Jameela Jamil's story about getting harassed after rejecting a guy went viral because it’s relatable for all the wrong reasons.

Photo by Andrew Toth/Getty Images

Nearly every woman has a story of receiving hostility because they rejected a man’s advances.

At best, we receive insults, such as “You should be flattered someone wants to go out with you,” or “Whatever, you’re ugly anyways.”

At worst, it’s physical violence.


The Good Place actress (and internet hero) Jameela Jamil opened up about the time she was punched in the face for turning down someone who was hitting on her. Yup, you read that right.

Jamil posted a story of a time when she received verbal abuse for turning someone down. “Was out at the shops with my friend. Man ogles me. Man then approaches me to give me his number. I explain I have a boyfriend but thank him for the offer. Man then threatens my career, saying I better remember that I rejected him. And then Shouts at me that I’m low class...,” postedJamil.

When women turn down men, we come up with all sorts of excuses. We make up boyfriends. We nervously giggle. We say we’re not looking for someone right now. It’s all a show to avoid getting figuratively (and apparently sometimes literally) punched in the face.

It’s not fair that women have to do this, as one Twitter user commented onJamil’s post. “It’s gross that you had to mention that you were already taken by another man (we’ve probably all done this) to try to ‘let a man down easy’ in order to stay safe and that didn’t even ducking work,” wrote@SnarkyTwin.

The comment promoted Jamil to reveal the reason why she always gives the “I have a boyfriend” excuse.  “I once said no thank you to man when I was 19 and didn’t have an excuse... and he punched me in the face. After that whether or not I have a boyfriend, I say I do. Being a woman is truly, constantly scary. It’s like existing on thin ice,” posted Jamil. Like she’s suddenly going to want to go out with him because he punched her in the face?

Even though Jamil’s stories are, unfortunately, commonplace, we can learn something from these experiences. “Wecneed to teach children about rejection, so that we can change the way we see rejection as a society. We need to destigmatize it, so that it doesn’t feel like the ground is swallowing you up when someone says no, however nicely. This would lessen their need to lash out,” Jamil wrote.

Jamil’s Tweets inspired other women (and men) to open up about their experiences.

It should be enough to say, “Sorry, I’m not interested,” and have it end at that.

We shouldn’t have to make up excuses because we’re afraid of retaliation.

Now that women are speaking out against it, hopefully receiving harassment will be less common in the future.

lop
More

Abigail Disney is the granddaughter of the late Roy Disney, the co-founder of the Walt Disney Co. Abigail herself does not have a job within the company, but she has made some public complaints about the way things are being run and how it is effecting the employees of the company.

Disney recently spoke on the Yahoo News show "Through Her Eyes," and shared a story of how a Magic Kingdom employee reached out to her about the poor working conditions at the theme park. So, Disney went to see for herself, and she did not like what she found.

Keep Reading Show less
popular
Wellington District Police

Some animals have no respect for authority. Rogue penguins are disobeying the police in New Zealand, and they can't stop, won't stop.

Two little blue penguins were spotted at Sushi Bi near the Wellington railway station, allegedly trying to nest. The penguins had to cross through busy lanes of traffic running between the harbor and the sushi bar.

The dangerous duo was detained by the police, then released back into Wellington Harbour.

Keep Reading Show less
Nature

Netflix

How much of what we do is influenced by what we see on TV? When it comes to risky behavior, Netflix isn't taking any chances.

After receiving a lot of heat, the streaming platform is finally removing a controversial scenedepicting teen suicide in season one of "13 Reasons Why. The decision comes two years after the show's release after statistics reveal an uptick in teen suicide.

"As we prepare to launch season three later this summer, we've been mindful about the ongoing debate around the show. So on the advice of medical experts, including Dr. Christine Moutier, Chief Medical Officer at the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, we've decided with creator Brian Yorkey and the producers to edit the scene in which Hannah takes her own life from season one," Netflix said in a statement, per The Hollywood Reporter.

Keep Reading Show less
Culture
Magnific Eye / Unsplash

Los Angeles is experiencing a homeless epidemic that was years in the making.

Over the past six years, the unhoused population in the city has risen 75 percent. The city's lack of homeless shelters and affordable housing has forced many who can't afford L.A.'s sky-high rents to live on the streets.

According to LAist, since 2000, renter incomes have decreased by 3 percent while rents have gone up 32 percent.

While the city has launched a $100 million-per-year program to help the problem, rapper, entrepreneur, and actor Jaden Smith has found his own way of responding to the crisis: love.

Keep Reading Show less
Communities