Millennial man wonders if he’s ‘dumb’ for wanting kids in his late 30s

“I don’t want to be a geriatric dad, but I don’t feel like I’m old?”

May 23, 2024

Photo credit: Canva – A man is wondering if it's too late for him to have children at 38 years old.

The medical community coined the term “geriatric pregnancy” to differentiate anyone who becomes pregnant after the age of 35, mostly as a safety measure. But while there are some age-related risks that come from having a baby later in life, many argue that the label is misleading and outdated…not to mention offensive.

Still, it’s enough for some to wonder if they’re somehow too late when it comes to starting a family.

That was certainly the case for a man who sought advice on the “Millennial” subreddit asking if he and his wife were “dumb” for changing their minds about having kids in their late 30s.

“My wife (34 f) and I (37 m) have suddenly found ourselves having the kid conversation a lot after 12 years together as ‘childfree,’” he wrote, saying that he could see them both “trying” in about a year to 18 months. By then he’ll be 38.

He went on to explain that a lot his childhood was spent moving around and feeling neglected as a result of his parents getting divorced, all of which made him not feel “stable” enough to have kids of his own.

But now, he and his wife are debt free and have stable income, setting a solid foundation to start a new chapter. But still, they wonder if it’s too late.

Am I dumb for having kids at age 38?
byu/stillyoinkgasp inMillennials

“Now I’m staring down the reality that the youngest I’ll be if we have kids is 38. I don’t want to be a geriatric dad, but I don’t feel like I’m old? I already have back and neck issues, though. I have friends with a 16-year-old FFS! Do I want to be 56 with an 18-year-old? Anyone have kids late that maybe can shed some perspective?”

People were quick to offer insight.

“My dad was 38 when I was born, I’m 40. He’s a healthy, active 78 and is a fully present granddad. We had our first at 30 and were oddly the youngest parents in our friend group and among our kids peers at school,” one person wrote.

Another added, “My dad was 38 when I was born, and 56 when I was 18. And guess what? We’re now 71 and 33 and still go biking, sailing, and bar hopping. All is possible! :)”

A third shared:

“I’m 36 with a 3 yr old. Met a woman at the playground yesterday who is 42 with a 4 yr old. I personally am glad that it panned out this way for me, bc my spouse and I are in a much better place relationship wise, financially, and professionally to take optimum care for our kiddo. If it had happened sooner, we would have struggled and I probably wouldn’t be where I am today career wise.

There is absolutely pros and cons to both, but 38 is not too old. Hell my parents had my youngest brother when they were both 48 and he’s a great kid. Just because your path deviates from the norm doesn’t mean it’s wrong or you missed your chance.”

Another suspected that the man’s fears had “nothing to do with age” and were really just the regular parenting anxiety. The OP replied, “Fair…I thought maybe it was financial, but when we ‘solved’ that it persists…”

And that’s when another person broke down how parenting is a logic-defying “leap of faith” at any age, so anxiety is just part of the process.

parenting, parenting at 30, geriatric pregnancy — "No one can really prepare you for what it’s like to be a parent." <a href="https://www.canva.com/photos">Photo credit: Canva</a>

“Part of the problem is that no one can really prepare you for what it’s like to be a parent. You just can’t fully understand what it’s like until you have a kid…The best descriptions of parenthood that I got before having a kid was 1) that it’s both the best and worst thing that will ever happen to you and 2) that it’s like dying and being reborn as a completely new person. Parenthood isn’t like your old life plus a kid. It is a totally different life,” they wrote.

“We had kids late and as far as that goes it’s been fine so far. Biggest issues for us have been that dealing with both the sleep deprivation during the baby years and the constant illness in the daycare and school age years would probably have been easier in our 20s and 30s but I don’t think those are really easy for parents of any age.

There’s no real wrong or right answer in this decision. Whatever you choose it will be the best choice for you.”

Lastly, someone suggested that if they were wanting to have kids, to act now, as “there’s no sense in kicking the can any further.” Apparently, that’s what the OP’s wife keeps telling him.

Bottom line: having a baby earlier in adulthood is by no means an inherently superior choice to waiting until later. And no matter what age it happens, you’ll never feel 100% ready for such a huge transition. Make the choice that works best for you. Forget the rest.

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In Partnership With Habitat For Humanity →

Homeowners celebrate the completion of their new home in Cambodia's Siem Reap Province alongside Habitat for Humanity volunteers and staff.

Culture, Family

A safe, stable home can change lives for the better. Here’s how Habitat for Humanity wants to make that possible for everyone.

Better health, better jobs, and a brighter future all start with access to a safe, affordable home.

Sarah Watts

3/25/2026
A single door can open up a world of endless possibilities. For homeowners, the front door of their house is a gateway to financial stability, job security, and better health. Yet for many, that door remains closed. Due to the rising costs of housing, 1 in 3 people around the world wake up without the security of safe, affordable housing.

Since 1976, Habitat for Humanity has made it their mission to unlock and open the door to opportunity for families everywhere, and their efforts have paid off in a big way. Through their work over the past 50 years, more than 65 million people have gained access to new or improved housing, and the movement continues to gain momentum. Since 2011 alone, Habitat for Humanity has expanded access to affordable housing by a hundredfold.

A world where everyone has access to a decent home is becoming a reality, but there’s still much to do. As they celebrate 50 years of building, Habitat for Humanity is inviting people of all backgrounds and talents to be part of what comes next through Let’s Open the Door, a global campaign that builds on this momentum and encourages people everywhere to help expand access to safe, affordable housing for those who need it most. Here’s how the foundation to a better world starts with housing, and how everyone can pitch in to make it happen.

Volunteers raise a wall for the framework of a new home during the first day of building at Habitat for Humanity’s 2025 Carter Work Project.

Globally, almost 3 billion people, including 1 in 6 U.S. families, struggle with high costs and other challenges related to housing. A crisis in itself, this also creates larger problems that affect families and communities in unexpected ways. People who lack affordable, stable housing are also more likely to experience financial hardship in other areas of their lives, since a larger share of their income often goes toward rent, utilities, and frequent moves. They are also more likely to experience health problems due to chronic stress or environmental factors, such as mold. Housing insecurity also goes hand-in-hand with unstable employment, since people may need to move further from their jobs or switch jobs altogether to offset the cost of housing.

Affordable homeownership creates a stable foundation for families to thrive, reducing stress and increasing the likelihood for good health and stable employment. Habitat for Humanity builds and repairs homes with individual families, but it also strengthens entire communities as well. The MicroBuild® Initiative, for example, strengthens communities by increasing access to loans for low-income families seeking to build or repair their homes. Habitat ReStore locations provide affordable appliances and building materials to local communities, in addition to creating job and volunteer opportunities that support neighborhood growth.

Marsha and her son pose for a photo while building their future home with Southern Crescent Habitat for Humanity in Georgia.

Everyone can play a part in the fight for housing equity and the pursuit of a better world. Over the past 50 years, Habitat for Humanity has become a leader in global housing thanks to an engaged network of volunteers—but you don’t need to be skilled with a hammer to make a meaningful impact. Building an equitable future means calling on a wide range of people and talents.

Here’s how you can get involved in the global housing movement:
- Speaking up on social media about the growing housing crisis
- Volunteering on a Habitat for Humanity build in your local community
- Travel and build with Habitat in the U.S. or in one of 60+ countries where we work around the globe
- Join the Let’s Open the Door movement and, when you donate, you can create your own personalized door
- Shop or donate at your local Habitat ReStore
Every action, big and small, drives a global movement toward a better future. A safe home unlocks opportunity for families and communities alike, but it’s volunteers and other supporters, working together with a shared vision, who can open the door for everyone.

Visit habitat.org/open-door to learn more and get involved today.
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https://youtu.be/4Al1UorzYZE?feature=shared A man speaks to a judge in a courtroom.

Family, Parenting

Man ran a red light rushing to his wife. What the judge did next left the courtroom silent.

“Based on those circumstances, I think it’s appropriate that I dismiss this case.” Judge Frank Caprio after hearing why a man ran a red light to reach his pregnant wife.

Adam Albright-Hanna

Upworthy Staff

5/6/2026

When Jean Lucardi appeared before Judge Frank Caprio on “Caught In Providence,” he was facing a fine for running a red light. The case started with the kind of light-hearted banter that makes Caprio’s courtroom famous. The judge joked about Lucardi’s impressive beard, asking why he grew it.

“Because I’m bald,” Lucardi said. “So, making sense with my face.”

Caprio teased that maybe the sun’s glare on his bald head caused him to miss the light. But the mood shifted completely when Lucardi explained what actually happened.

A pregnant woman makes a phone call. Photo credit: Canva

Lucardi worked as a Lyft driver to support his family. The day he ran the red light, his pregnant wife called him while he was stopped at a signal. She was bleeding. She was having a miscarriage. This was their fifth loss.

“When she called me, she told me she was bleeding and she was pregnant at the time, and I shut down the app, and I was trying to rush to go be with her because she was by herself in the house,” Lucardi explained. He thought he was catching a yellow light but realized later it had already turned red. His wife eventually recovered, but they lost their baby that day.

The courtroom went quiet.

“Based on those circumstances, I think it’s appropriate that I dismiss this case,” Caprio said. He asked about Lucardi’s family, and Lucardi shared that it had been a difficult time. He’d been taking steps to help his wife heal from the trauma of multiple pregnancy losses.

“Our thoughts are with you and your family. Good luck to you. The case is dismissed,” Caprio told him.

The episode, titled “The Pain of Losing a Child,” captured something that doesn’t always show up in courtrooms: the ability to see the human being behind the violation. This wasn’t about letting someone off the hook for breaking a rule. It was about recognizing that sometimes life puts people in impossible situations where following every rule to the letter stops making sense.

Caprio has built a reputation for this kind of compassion. In another episode called “Homeless and Hungry,” he met a homeless autistic woman whose car had been booted with ten violations. She’d just secured a job and was living in her car. She asked for a lenient payment plan. Instead, Caprio covered $300 of her $400 fine through the Filomena Fund and gave her a month to pay the remaining $100. When he learned she was eating only one meal a day, he made sure she left the court with enough money to buy food.

These moments show what’s possible when the justice system makes room for understanding alongside enforcement. Lucardi left that courtroom without a fine, but probably with something more valuable: the knowledge that someone in a position of power had listened to his story and responded with humanity instead of just procedure.

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Photo credit: via Ketut Subiyanto/Pexels – A woman is upset with her husband and wants to leave him.

Family, Modern Families

‘Why women leave’: Woman who ‘does everything’ shares why she left her husband who did nothing

This is a common story in many households.

Tod Perry

Upworthy Staff

5/6/2026

There are a few prominent reasons why 70% of divorces in the United States among heterosexual couples are filed by women. Women have more economic opportunities than in decades past and are better positioned to care for themselves and their children without a husband’s income.

Another big reason is that even though the world has become much more egalitarian than in the past, women still bear the brunt of most of the emotional labor in the home. In 2022, Gilza Fort-Martinez, a Florida-based licensed couples’ therapist, told the BBC that men are socialized to have lower emotional intelligence than women, leaving their wives to do most of the emotional labor.

Secondly, studies show that women still do most of the domestic work in the home, and, among couples with children, women are often the default parent. In short, many women are pulling double or triple duty for their households.

One woman’s day says it all

In 2023, a TikToker with two children (now @littleoldme_myversion, but formerly @thesoontobeexwife) shared why she decided to leave her husband of two decades and her story recounts a common theme: She did all the work and her husband did little but complain.

The video, entitled “Why women leave,” has received over 2 million views.

@littleoldme_myversion
Y’all I laughed when I realized he truly does treat me better now then when he was trying to be in a marriage with me. How is this better?? How did I ever think before was ok?? #toxicrelationship #divorce #mentalloadofmotherhood #divorcetok #divorceisanoption #chooseyou #mentalhealth #mentalload #fyp #mentalload #emotionallabor
♬ labour – Paris Paloma

“So for the men out there who watch this, which frankly I kind of hope there aren’t any, you have an idea maybe what not to do,” she starts the video. “Yesterday, I go to work all day, go pick up one kid from school, go grocery shopping, go pick up the other kid from school, come home. Kids need a snack, make the snack. Kids want to play outside, we play outside.”

Her husband then comes home after attending a volunteer program, which she didn’t want him to join, and the self-centeredness begins. “So he gets home, he eats the entire carton of blueberries I just purchased for the children’s lunch and asks me what’s for dinner. I tell him I don’t know because the kids had a late snack and they’re not hungry yet,” she says in the video.

She then explains how the last time he cooked, which was a rare event, he nearly punched a hole in the wall because he forgot an ingredient. Their previous home had multiple holes in the walls. Dr. Gail Saltz, a psychiatrist and host of the Power of Different podcast, says that when men punch walls, it’s a sign that they haven’t “learned to deal with anger in a reasonable way.”

“Anyway, finally one kid is hungry,” the TikToker continues. “So, I offered to make pancakes because they’re quick and easy and it’s late. He sees the pancake batter and sees that there’s wheat flour in it and starts complaining. Says he won’t eat them. Now, I am a grown adult making pancakes for my children who I am trying to feed nutritionally balanced meals. So yes, there’s wheat flour in the pancake mix.”

Then her husband says he’s not doing the dishes because he didn’t eat any pancakes. “Friends, the only thing this man does around this house is dishes occasionally. If I cook, he usually does the dishes. I cook most nights. But here’s the thing: That’s all he does. I do everything else. Everything. Everything.”

She then listed all of the household duties she handles.

“I cook, I clean the bathrooms, I make the lunches, I make the breakfasts, I mow the lawn, I do kids’ bedtime. I literally do everything and he does dishes once a day, maybe,” she says.

@littleoldme_myversion
I HAVE OFFICIALLY FILED FOR DIVORCE 🎉 #divorce #divorcetok #toxicrelationship #divorceisanoption #fyp #mentalhealth #chooseyou #iamenough #iwillnotbeafraid #mentalloadofmotherhood #emotionallabor
♬ Cool Kids (our sped up version) – Echosmith

The comments poured in from everywhere

The video received over 8,700 comments and most of them were words of support for the TikToker who would go on to file for divorce from her husband.

“The amount of women I’ve heard say that their male partners are only teaching how to be completely independent of them, theirs going to be so many lonely men out there,” one commenter wrote. “I was married to someone just like this for over 35 years. You will be so happy when you get away from him,” another said.

“The way you will no longer be walking on eggshells in your own home is an amazing feeling. You got this!” one more added.

@littleoldme_myversion
If I ever date a man again they have to like Taylor, Chappell and alllllll the girly pop #taylorswift #chappellroan #swifttok #swiftie #pop #girlypop @Taylor Swift @Taylor Nation @chappell roan
♬ original sound – Little Old Me

Two years later, here is where she is now

Two years on, our TikToker is doing well. Her page is dedicated to “single motherhood,” “life in [my] 40s,” and, of course, “loads of Taylor Swift [and] some books.” In a recent TikTok video, she shares footage of a show where people of all ages and stages are dancing to a cover of Taylor Swift’s “I Can Do it With a Broken Heart” with text overlay that reads, “The only kind of men I will accept in life, those that enthusiastically sing Taylor Swift and Chappell Roan.” Honestly, that’s the standard and more power to her.

This article originally appeared three years ago. It has been updated.

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Photo credit: Canva – Postpartum depression requires various kinds of support.

Family, Moms

New mom shares texts from her mother-in-law that exemplify postpartum depression support

This mother-in-law knows what she’s doing.

Annie Reneau

5/5/2026
First-time motherhood can feel overwhelming in every way. Bringing a human into the world that you are responsible for and fall madly in love with is life-changing, to say the least. But when you add a layer of postpartum depression (PPD) onto that overwhelm, it can all feel like way too much to handle.

A mom shared texts her mother-in-law sent her when she was struggling with PPD with her firstborn, and people are loving them. The post from @mamaesterm provides a great example of what support looks like.

@mamaesterm
#babiesoftiktok #firsttimemom #postpartum #mil
♬ Atlantis (Sped Up Version) – Seafret

First, it’s important to note that one of the most important ways to support someone going through PPD is to encourage and help them seek professional help. Treatments are available.

Each text has a specific element that makes it particularly effective:

‘Can I come by and help tidy up while you take a nap with the baby?’

This message acknowledges that Mom needs sleep and also needs a clean home. Often, those needs are not compatible in the early weeks and months of motherhood. People tell you to “sleep when the baby sleeps,” but if you have a high-needs baby, nap time is often the only time you have to get things done. People will also say the state of your house doesn’t matter, but for many, if not most, it’s easier to manage mental health when the home is under control.

So, having someone ask if they can come and help with the house while Mom naps with the baby hits both needs simultaneously.

Helping with the house while Mom sleeps can be a huge help.

‘You’re doing such a great job, I know it’s hard sometimes. [heart emoji]‘

Encouragement is so important for new parents. It’s common to feel like you have no idea what you’re doing with a new baby, while desperately wanting to not screw it up. And when you’re struggling with PPD, the guilt over feeling unable to care for your child the way you want to makes all of that worse. Being told you’re doing a good job feels like a refreshing drink of water.

‘Look how sweet she is she’s the cutest little thing, I’m obsessed with the precious photo editing app you told me about.’ [baby photo]

When you’re wrapped up in all the feelings, hormones, and overwhelm of new motherhood with PPD piled on top of it, it’s easy to lose perspective. Seeing reality through a loved one’s eyes can sometimes help ease some of the distorted thinking.

The beauty in this message is there’s no shame or guilt attached to it. Some people might say something like, “Why are you sad? You have a beautiful, healthy baby!” which often just leads the mom to feeling guilty about feelings she can’t control. This text makes no judgments, and, in fact, reminds the mom of something positive she has done for her family.

Overwhelmed mother next to baby’s crib.

‘Pete mentioned it was a long night with baby girl. I’m doing a Starbucks run and will drop off breakfast for you on the porch.’

This one might just be the best. Asking if someone wants help is great. But sometimes just doing the thing without asking, especially if it’s not intrusive in any way, is the way to go. Saying, “I’m heading out for food. I’m going to grab you some and drop it on your porch,” removes any obligation from the equation. No decision had to be made. No pressure to interact or entertain, which can be a big load off. And no guilt over the state of the house or your lack of a shower, which is huge.

As one commenter wrote, “Starbucks left on the porch…that’s someone who just wants to love and help without intruding. She’s a gem, keep her.”

What are some common signs of PPD?

Hormonal fluctuations after birth can cause a lot of emotional ups and downs. What makes postpartum depression different from the “baby blues” is the intensity and severity of the downs.

According to the Cleveland Clinic, these symptoms can be signs you might be struggling with PPD:
- Feeling sad, worthless, hopeless, or guilty
- Worrying excessively or feeling on edge
- Loss of interest in hobbies or things you usually enjoy
- Changes in appetite or not eating
- Loss of energy and motivation
- Trouble sleeping or wanting to sleep all the time
- Crying for no reason or excessively
- Difficulty thinking or focusing
- Lack of interest in your baby or feeling anxious around your baby
If you’ve recently given birth and these symptoms sound familiar, definitely have a conversation about what you’re feeling with your doctor. And if you know someone who is struggling postpartum, support is crucial. In addition to helping them find professional help, providing encouragement and practical help, especially without having to be asked, can be invaluable.
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Photo credit: Instagram/@kendraalley [with permission] – Kendra Alley's sons give pitch presentation for family vacation pick.

Family, Parenting

Parents start family tradition where kids pitch their ideas for the next vacation

“You could see his confidence building as he presented.”

Emily Shiffer

5/5/2026

Building confidence isn’t easy at any age, but for mom Kendra Alley, she is making sure she starts the process early. By getting creative, she’s teaching her young sons about confidence.

The married mom-of-three shared her family’s new tradition that doubles as a confidence-building technique. When each child turns 10 years old, they get to choose where the family goes on vacation.

The caveat: they must do a pitch-presentation explaining where they want to go and why. “In our family, turning 10 means you pick the family trip. Anywhere in the world. But you have to research it … and present it to us,” she explained in an Instagram post.

View this post on Instagram

The pitch-presentation, explained

Alley told Upworthy more details about what the presentation entails, and why she and her husband have their sons do it.

“Whenever one of our boys turns 10, they get to choose anywhere in the world for a family trip. They have to research the destination, and present it to the family,” she shared. “We give them a simple outline to follow (where, why, things you want to do, things your want to buy, things you want to eat, etc.) We love that it teaches them budgeting, planning, public speaking, patience (they make the presentation about two months in advance, but we know their location months before that), and gratitude all wrapped into something exciting and memorable.”

She adds, “One of my favorite parts is that they have to think about and anticipate the trip for a long time. In a world of instant gratification, there’s something really special about waiting, preparing, and building excitement as a family. I honestly think the anticipation makes the experience even sweeter for them. They don’t want to waste a second.”

The tradition began in 2024, when their oldest son turned 10. He chose to go to Loch Lyme in New Hampshire (and drive there in an RV). And this year, her second oldest son turned 10. For his trip, he chose Hawaii.

View this post on Instagram

Her second son gives his presentation

Alley captioned the video of her second son Loch’s presentation, “I’m so proud of him, he was so nervous. You could see his confidence building as he presented.”

“Let’s do it!” Alley encourages him, and her husband shouts, “You’ve got this, my man!”

He stands in front of them in the family’s living room with a microphone and a presentation of slides on the TV. He is clearly nervous, and Alley says to him, “Just start by telling us why we’re here!”

As he speaks about his dream to travel to Hawaii (while dressed in an on-theme Hawaiian shirt), he visibly becomes more secure in himself as he details things he wants to eat (like shaved ice), the top things he wants to see (“Mauna Kea and Mauna Loa which are the twin mountains that kind of look like butt cheeks”), and do (like swim with sharks), and more.

She also told Upworthy, “This video was from our middle son’s presentation for Hawaii. My eldest’s trip was two years ago, and MUCH different. I think parents are craving meaningful experiences and traditions that bring everyone together.”

View this post on Instagram

Viewers respond

Many parents and viewers were inspired by the Alley’s family tradition, and shared their thoughts in the comments:

“Love this. As someone who teaches people public speaking and presentation skills, this is amazing. I have never thought about having my own kids develop their skills in this area.”

“Bravo to the parents. Persuasive speaking, presentation design, research, and then he gets the experiences of travel on top of it. I love this 👏.”

“I implore folks to MAKE YOUR KID DO SMALL PRESENTATIONS LIKE THIS AS EARLY AND OFTEN AS POSSIBLE! Thank me later! —-A former high school public speaking teacher.”

“Love his close – end with a question and a big ask. He’s got a future in sales 👏.”

“I told my daughter we were doing this after you told me this idea and she is pre-planning for Japan 😭🙏🏼🤣.”

“I love someone who dresses the theme!”

“This is the sweetest 🥹❤️.”

“I just love this so much! Such epic parenting….from a non parent 😂.”

“Stealing this for my future children.”

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https://www.canva.com/photos/MAG3IPmP7w8-father-and-son-reading-book-together-on-sofa-at-home/A quote about reading fairytales to children is often attributed to Albert Einstein.

Family, Parenting

Why people have been accidentally giving Einstein credit for this powerful quote about fairytales

“If you want your children to be intelligent, read them fairy tales. If you want them to be more intelligent, read them more fairy tales.”

Emily Shiffer

5/5/2026

German physicist Albert Einstein was a genius. Many people view him as a wise authority on life advice and wisdom, and numerous Albert Einstein quotes are now famous.

One topic he shared his insights on is parenting. Einstein was a father of three, and he shared his thoughts on how to raise resilient kids.

But there is one parenting quote often attributed to Einstein that he did not say. The topic: how to make children more intelligent.

Einstein’s misattributed quote

The famous quote people assume Einstein said is:

“If you want your children to be intelligent, read them fairy tales. If you want them to be more intelligent, read them more fairy tales.”

However, the quote has not been verified as directly coming from Einstein. Folklorist Stephen Winick at the American Folklife Center of the Library of Congress explained the “folklore” behind the quote and how it’s been spread throughout the years.

The story about Einstein’s fairytale quote

According to Winick, Einstein may in fact have said the quote (or a version of it), but it was likely misconstrued throughout the years.

“As a result of this oral, print, and electronic transmission, the story of Einstein advocating fairy tales resembles other folk stories: it exists in multiple versions that vary in their details,” he explained.

He traced the history of Einstein’s quote using the Library of Congress resources, noting that the quote was first shared in print in 1958 by librarian Elizabeth Margulis in an article titled “Fairy Tales and More Fairy Tales” in the New Mexico Library Bulletin.

Margulis shared a story about an interaction she heard about between Einstein and another woman, where the woman asked him advice on how to help her son become a scientist:

“In Denver I heard a story about a woman who was friendly with the late Dr. Einstein, surely acknowledged as an outstanding ‘pure’ scientist. She wanted her child to become a scientist, too, and asked Dr. Einstein for his suggestions for the kind of reading the child might do in his school years to prepare him for this career. To her surprise Dr. Einstein recommended ‘fairy tales and more fairy tales.’ The mother protested this frivolity and asked for a serious answer, but Dr. Einstein persisted, adding that creative imagination is the essential element in the intellectual equipment of the true scientist, and that fairy tales are the childhood stimulus of this quality! (p.3)”

@nicholas
The #final #words of Albert Einstein #learnontiktok #epitaph #history #historybuff
♬ Paper Birds (3 min) – Jordan Halpern Schwartz

Modern-day misinformation on Einstein’s quote

The story shared by Margulis has been the crux of the quote’s origin, but it was not a firsthand account. Winick adds that her story was then re-shared by another famous children’s librarian in 1958, and another version of the story was given in a 1963 library publication by author Doris Gates, furthering its spread.

Winick cites an article by children’s librarian Jane Buel Bradley to explain:

“…Doris Gates, writer and children’s librarian, reports that Albert Einstein told an anxious mother who wanted to help her child become a scientist: ‘First, give him fairy tales; second, give him fairy tales, and third, give him fairy tales!’”

Since the 1960s, the quote has continued to take on a life of its own. However, evidence of Einstein ever saying it has yet to be confirmed.

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Photo credit: Canva – A woman is suprosed after reading something on her computer

Family, Kids

Woman with an unfortunate name has a hilarious warning for all parents-to-be

Her name is Samantha Hart. Her professional email address is the problem.

Tod Perry

Upworthy Staff

5/5/2026

The recent trend of parents going out of their way to give their children unique names has brought up a lot of discussion on social media. Some of these names sound cute when a child is 5 years old. But will Caeleigh, Zoomer or Rhyedyr look like a serious adult on a job application in a few years?

A recent viral video on TikTok is a unique twist on the current discussion surrounding names. Samantha Hart has a name that doesn’t seem like it would draw any negative attention in professional circles. However, her parents didn’t consider email conventions when they named her back in the late ‘90s when email was new.

Her name was fine, but her email was not

“My name is Samantha Hart,” she said. “Most companies use the email designation of first initial, last name, meaning my email would be ‘shart.’” For the uninitiated, a “shart” is an unintentional release when one thinks they only have gas. Yikes.

@thesam_show
sorry if i talk about this problem too much but it is HAPPENING AGAIN!!
♬ original sound – Sam Showalter

The issue arose because Samantha has had two “professional” jobs in the past in which her name has been an issue. So, as she began a third job, she wondered how to approach the situation with a new employer.

“At every single workplace, I have received an email from HR the week before I start letting me know that my name does not exactly fit the company email structure as they would intend and [asked] would I mind if they gave me a different structure for my email,” Hart said.

So she asked her followers on TikTok if she should just “reach out, right off the bat” to her employer and ask for “something else” or wait for HR to react to her email situation. But most of the responses were from people who have been in the same embarrassing situation as Samantha and wished their parents had thought twice before naming them.

She was definitely not alone in this

“Clittmann has entered the chat. Have been dealing with this since college,” Chris.Littmann responded.

“As Swallo, I feel your pain,” Samantha Wallo replied.

“My name is Sue Hartlove so my work emails are always shartlove,” Sue added.

“I went to college w Tiffany Estes,” Abby1233213 wrote.

“Rkelley has entered the chat,” Rach commented.

“Worked with a guy named Sam Adcock,” Lori added.

“My last name is Hartstein, and my mom’s personal email is ‘shartstein.’ People literally call her shart-stein,” Lyss wrote.

“I used to work with a BAllsman,” JenniferKerastas added.

“I worked with a Patrick Ecker at a previous job…” NoName wrote.

“Our high school used last name, first two letters of first name. My friend’s email ended up being ‘mountme,’” Averageldeal commented.

Andy Marks won the comment section with: “Always best to initiate the shart convo… wait too long and it tends to come out at the least opportune moment.”

Woman types on her phone. Photo credit: Canva

What the IT experts had to say

While the comments were dominated by people sharing their unfortunate email addresses, a few people in the IT field shared their advice for how Samantha should approach her new employer with her email issue. Most agreed that she should address the issue before it becomes a larger problem.

“As someone in IT—please reach out. When we have to rename a bunch of logins after someone starts it can cause headaches for everyone (inc you!),” Kelsey Lane wrote.

Expecting parents, please take notes.

As a postscript, Hart later told BuzzFeed that she was getting married and would be taking her new husband’s last name. “I actually will be sad when I change my last name,” she said. “It’s such an iconic thing, and it’s something that I’ve turned into a kind of lore for myself.”

This article originally appeared three years ago.

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Lynalice Bandy shares what her home looks like after working six 10-hour days and getting no help from her husband.

Family, Modern Families

“You deserve better”: Mom leaves her husband after he refuses to clean up for 6 days straight

That’s the sound of women everywhere applauding.

Tod Perry

Upworthy Staff

5/5/2026

Household inequity is getting better in some households. In others, it’s completely out of control. A viral TikTok video highlights an extreme version of inequality that many wives and mothers in heterosexual relationships face. However, the mom in this story hit her limit and won’t deal with it anymore. Lynalice Bandy, who goes by @5kids5catssomedogstoo on TikTok, posted a video that showed her home looking like a disaster after she worked six 10-hour days straight while her husband did nothing to help.

@5kids2catsandsomechaos
#divorce #parentingfail #messyhouse #whenwomen #depressionanxiety #clean #satifying
♬ SUN GOES DOWN – Andreas Roehrig

Her time-lapse video shows every room in the house completely trashed, with toys, food, and laundry scattered everywhere. “Shampoo on the carpets in the girls’ room, nail polish all over nugget covers, hair, and carpet. Scissors were used to cut hair, the down comforter, the mattress cover, and two nugget covers,” wrote the mom. “I’ve worked six, ten-hour days in a row with only one day off being a sick day,” she captioned the video. “I’d like to pretend I’m not the only person who cleans here, but as you can see…These rooms don’t get much attention when I’m not here.”

She says her husband’s excuse was that he was focused on doing his schoolwork and couldn’t pay attention to the kids. “Now, that school is out for a break, he doesn’t have that excuse anymore,” Bandy says, noting that all of his attention has been focused on “the four vehicles in our driveway that he wants to work on continuously.”

She packed up and didn’t look back

In a follow-up video, Bandy announced that she left her husband after the debacle.

The original video received over 17,000 comments, many of which were from supportive women. “You deserve much better, and he deserves to be alone. Much love to you from someone that left that life behind almost 20 yrs ago. You’ll get here, too,” Angela LaRoche wrote.

“Ma’am, you are nothing short of amazing! Hang in there!” Japanese with Jenny wrote. “That home is beautiful because of YOU,” Hillary added. “You put in so much work, and it is not unseen by me and so many others. But, you DO deserve better. Proud of you.”

@5kids2catsandsomechaos
Sounds about right…
♬ Fuck you by Lily Allan – Jess🏹

Even though Bandy’s experience with her husband is an extreme case of a couple whose domestic duties are way out of balance, it points to a problem that plagues many households. Even though families are becoming more equal, women still do significantly more housework than men.

The numbers tell an even bigger story

A study utilizing data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics’ American Time Use Survey found that women 15 years and older spend 5.7 hours daily doing housework and looking after kids and elders. Men in the same age group do an average of 3.6 hours of daily domestic work. That’s a 37% difference in time spent on household responsibilities.

Further, women who work an average of 35 hours a week spend 4.9 hours a day on household chores and child care, while men who work the same amount spend an average of 3.8 hours.

@5kids2catsandsomechaos
Can you spot how many times Winky sits in a box or plops for belly rubs? #cleaning #messyhouse #clean #timelapse #oddlysatisfying #grwm #carpetcleaning #cattok
♬ If I Go, I’m Goin – Gregory Alan Isakov

The comments show that many women are frustrated with their husbands for not doing their fair share. Hopefully, this video will encourage more people to speak out about domestic inequality and for more men to step up and do their part.

Here is where she is now

Nearly two years after Lynalice left her husband, she and her five children are living together in a new home. Her recent videos show that she’s having difficulty keeping it clean because she’s been working 60-plus hours a week and suffers from ADHD. Being the single mother of five has to be tough, so she has developed a new motto: “Progress, not perfection.” In November 2024, she shared a video of her and her family getting things together in their new home.

This article originally appeared three years ago. It has been updated.

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The mother of artist Doug Weaver made a curriculum for him for dating

Family, Parenting

His mother gave him the ‘husbands in training’ course every parent should give their kids

This is exactly the kind of parenting more people wish they had received.

Tod Perry

Upworthy Staff

5/5/2026

Even though the marriage rate in the United States is on a steep decline, chances are that the majority of kids growing up today will get married at some point in their lives. If current trends continue, roughly 40% of those marriages will end in divorce, according to current research.

Research published in the Couple and Family Psychology journal found that the top five reasons for divorce are a lack of commitment, infidelity, too much conflict, getting married young, and financial problems.

Wouldn’t it be great if we were taught from a young age how to be a good spouse so we could avoid these pitfalls? Many of them are totally solvable with good communication and commitment from both parties. But in American culture, most of us aren’t taught the specifics of how to have a happy and healthy marriage. Most of us tend to pick things up from watching the married people in our orbit, most likely our parents.

No comment on how that’s going.

The other way we learn is by making the mistakes ourselves. By then, it’s usually too late. And the data around second and third marriages isn’t very promising when you dig into it.

One mom decided to do something about it

Artist Doug Weaver had a much different upbringing. His mother, Mickey, made a curriculum for him and his two older brothers when they were kids to help them be great husbands when they got married.

You’ve heard of things like “Mom-Son Date Night” (some dads and daughters do it, too) where mothers will take their boys out on a “date” so they can learn basic chivalry and manners?

Weaver’s training was like that on steroids.

“When I was a kid, my mom did this thing for me and my two older brothers called ‘Husbands in Training,’” he explained in a TikTok video that has more than 5.9 million views. “It was a full, multiple-level curriculum on how to be a better husband.”

@dougweaverart
Husbands in training! #parenting #storytime #story
♬ original sound – dougweaverart

Weaver says the training covered topics from chivalry to eating to a rather uncomfortable discussion on “the ethics of the porn industry.” His mother also stressed the importance of listening to women and identifying when another man may be giving them trouble.

“There was a lot of really good stuff in that curriculum,” Doug said. “There were things like what to do if your spouse says something and the information they give is wrong. How to handle it if they say something wrong in public versus in private, when it is appropriate to correct them and when it isn’t.”

Weaver’s mother was also way ahead of her time because she made a big deal about teaching her sons the importance of consent. “We talked about consent, we talked about the basics of respecting and honoring women and listening to women, and all of the things that really just make you a decent human being,” Doug explained.

A young Doug must have absolutely hated sitting through conversations with his mom about porn, sex, and consent… but as a grown man, he looks back on the lessons fondly.

The curriculum was so good, dad enrolled too

The lessons were so powerful that even Weaver’s father decided to take the course. “A lot of the things that we were learning from my mom were things that he was never taught growing up,” Weaver said. “So, he decided he also wanted to take ‘Husbands in Training.’”

It brings to mind pre-marriage counseling or couples therapy. Programs are often offered (or mandated) through churches, so they aren’t usually a great fit for the non-religious. And couples without active “problems” may resist the idea of attending couples therapy due to the stubborn stigma around it.

The course officially ended when Weaver and his brothers got married. “My mom even made certificates of completion that she signed and gave to each of us on our wedding day,” he shared in his TikTok clip.

View this post on Instagram

However, the video Weaver shared was so popular on TikTok that he’s making his mother’s course available to the general public. “After posting about ‘Husbands in Training’ on TikTok, the TT community really wants my mom to produce content about raising boys to be good men,” he wrote on a GoFundMe fundraising campaign in 2022.

Now the lessons are available to everyone

The overwhelming response to Weaver’s TikTok has inspired a YouTube channel to spread Mickey’s lessons far and wide. But it has also made a lot of people realize that teaching people how to be great spouses is a lifelong journey and should be a major part of child-rearing. Learning how to be a good spouse shouldn’t just be something we pick up by accident.

As for Doug Weaver, his training appears to be paying off in the form of a happy marriage. He has since said he plans to adapt the curriculum for his own children, with a particular focus on consent and healthy conflict resolution.

This article originally appeared four years ago. It has been updated.

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