More
A self-proclaimed 'redneck' just ended the debate on gay marriage.
Absolutely hilarious.
02.12.15
What possible issue could a parent have had with this book?
Schools often have to walk a fine line when it comes to parental complaints. Diverse backgrounds, beliefs, and preferences for what kids see and hear will always mean that schools can't please everyone all the time, so educators have to discern what's best for the whole, broad spectrum of kids in their care.
Sometimes, what's best is hard to discern. Sometimes it's absolutely not.
Such was the case when a parent at a St. Louis elementary school complained in a Facebook group about a book that was read to her 7-year-old. The parent wrote:
"Anyone else check out the read a loud book on Canvas for 2nd grade today? Ron's Big Mission was the book that was read out loud to my 7 year old. I caught this after she watched it bc I was working with my 3rd grader. I have called my daughters school. Parents, we have to preview what we are letting the kids see on there."
The book in question, "Ron's Big Mission," highlights a true story from the childhood of Challenger astronaut Ron McNair, who had experienced discrimination as a child in South Carolina because he was Black. In 1959, when he was nine years old, McNair wanted to check out books at the library, but the librarian told him the library didn't loan books to "coloreds." McNair refused to leave the library until he was allowed to check out books. Rather than give him a library card, the librarian called the police, who ultimately convinced her to just let him check out books.
Seriously, what issue could this parent possibly take with such an inspiring story of a kid standing up to injustice and fighting for the right to educate himself? This was a child who single-handedly changed a library's racial segregation policy and grew up to be an astronaut—a genuine, real-life hero. What is there to take issue with? The parent didn't specify, so we're left to conjecture, but if there's any other possible reason than racism, I can't think of one.
Rockwood Education Equity and Diversity Director Brittany Hogan told KMOX News Radio that after hearing of the complaint, other parents responded immediately in the book's defense.
"They were saying this is amazing that they were buying copies of the book," Hogan said. "One of our parents came out and said she was going to purchase a copy for every second-grader at the elementary school that her children attends."
Hogan called McNair a hero and said, "He deserves to be celebrated. His story deserves to be told to our children. It's important that we continue to move in a space that embeds diverse curriculum."
And the school responded in the best possible way—by announcing the book was going to be read aloud to the whole student body via Zoom. That's how you shut down a bigot. Boom.
Here's Pond Elementary Principal Carlos Diaz-Granados reading "Ron's Big Mission" to students via Zoom and sharing why he thinks it's an important book for kids:
- YouTubewww.youtube.com
This article originally appeared on 9.18.23
"Sometimes I just feel really angry and I don’t know why."
An anonymous mother posted a question to Quora, a website where people can ask questions and other people can answer them. This mother wrote:
How do I tell my wonderful 11 year old son, (in a way that won't tear him down), that the way he has started talking to me (disrespectfully) makes me not want to be around him (I've already told him the bad attitude is unacceptable)?
It's a familiar scenario for those of us who have raised kids into the teen years. Our sweet, snuggly little kids turn into moody middle schoolers seemingly overnight, and sometimes we're left reeling trying to figure out how to handle their sensitive-yet-insensitive selves.
"Ah, puberty," she wrote, "It changes our sweet, wonderful little boys into sweet, eye-rolling, angsty, accidentally disrespectful, but still wonderful young proto-men." Yup.
Eberhardt then described a discussion she had with her 11 1/2 -year-old son when he started going through this stage—a conversation they had in the car, which is usually the best place to have potentially uncomfortable discussions with kids.
She told her son that she'd messed up in the way she'd talked to him about puberty, then explained exactly what was happening in his brain.
“I've spent all this time talking to you about the way puberty changes your body," Eberhardt told her son, "and what to expect as you go through the changes, but I completely forgot to talk to you about what's going on in your brain right now. Puberty is the time when your brain grows and changes more than at any other time in your life — well, except for when you're a baby, perhaps. So I really let you down by not preparing you for that. I'm so sorry."
Her son accepted her apology, then asked why is his brain was changing.
“That's the amazing thing," she told him. "Did you know that your brain grew and developed so quickly when you were little that by the time you were about five or six, your brain was almost as big and powerful as an adult's brain?"
"But here's the thing," she continued, "Even though your brain was super powerful, the instructions were for a child's brain. And all the information about building an adult's brain was a bit… let's say fuzzy. So your brain did the best it could, but it didn't really know what kind of person you were going to be back then, or what shape brain you were going to need."
“Now we come to puberty," she went on. "See, puberty is amazing. Not only is your body being transformed from a child's body to an adult's body, your brain has to be completely rewritten from a child's brain to an adult's brain."
“That sounds hard," her son responded.
“Yeah, it is," Eberhardt replied. “That's why I wish I'd warned you first. See, it takes a lot of energy to completely rewrite a brain. That's one of the reasons you get tired quicker at the moment — and that, of course, manifests in you being crankier and less patient than normal."
Eberhardt paused, then added, “That must be really frustrating for you."
Her son looked over at her, wiping his eyes. “It is," he responded. Sometimes I just feel really angry and I don't know why."
Eberhardt continued, “The other thing is that one of the first parts of your brain that gets super-sized to be like an adult is the amygdala. That's the part that controls your emotions and your survival instincts. You know how we've talked about fight/flight/freeze before, and how sometimes our brains think that being asked to speak in public is the same level of threat as being attacked by a sabre tooth tiger?"
Her son laughed. “Yes. So you have to tell your brain that there's no sabre tooth tiger to help you calm down."
“That's right," Eberhardt replied. "Well, that's what the amygdala looks after: sabre tooth tiger warnings and big emotions. So, the thing with puberty is that all of a sudden you've got an adult-sized amygdala hitting all your emotion buttons and your sabre-tooth tiger buttons. That must be really hard for you to manage."
Her son nodded and said, “Sometimes I don't know why I say the things I do. They just come out, and then I feel bad."
This is the moment where what a parent says can make or break a kid's spirit. But Eberhardt handled it with empathy and expertise.
“I know, Sweetheart," she said before explaining:
“See, the last part of your brain that gets rewritten is right at the front of your head. It's called the frontal cortex. And that's the part of your brain that's good at decision making and understanding consequences. So you've got this powerful adult amygdala hitting you with massive emotions, but you've still got a fuzzy child frontal cortex that can't make decisions or understand consequences as quickly as the amygdala wants you to. It pretty much sucks."
“So it's not my fault?" her son asked.
“No, it's puberty's fault your brain works the way it does," Eberhardt answered. "But that doesn't mean it's not your responsibility to recognise what's going on and change your actions. It's not easy, but it's not impossible, either. Your feelings are your feelings, and they're always okay. But you get to choose your actions. You get to choose what you do with your feelings. And, when you make a mistake, you get to choose to apologise for that mistake and make amends."
Eberhardt said she then paused for dramatic effect. “That's how you prove that you're becoming an adult."
It's also remarkable what happens when we empathize and communicate with our kids instead of simply chastising them.
Her son responded with a perfectly understandable and relatable, “Puberty sucks."
“Puberty absolutely sucks," Eberhardt responded. “I'm not in your head, but I can only imagine that it's a mess of confusion and chaos, and you don't know from one minute to the next how you feel about things."
Her son looked at her in surprise. “Yes! Exactly!"
“If it's confusing for you living inside there," Eberhardt continued, "imagine how confusing it is for me, when I only see your actions."
“That must be really confusing," her son agreed.
She nodded. “Do you know what that means?"
“What?"
“It means sometimes I'm going to make mistakes. Sometimes I'm going to get upset at things you do because I don't understand what's going on in your head. Sometimes I'm going to forget that you're halfway to being a man, and accidentally treat you like a child. Sometimes I'm going to expect more from you than you're able to give. This is my first time parenting someone through puberty, and I'm going to make mistakes. So can I ask you a favour?"
“What is it?"
“Can you just keep telling me what's going on in your head? The more we talk, the easier it will be for both of us to get through this puberty thing unscathed. Yeah?"
“Yeah," her son said.
Eberhardt said they "had a cuddle" before they got out of the car. She also said this conversation didn't magically make her son always speak respectfully or make her remember that he's not a little boy anymore. However, it did open up lines of communication and gave them a shared language to use.
For example, she wrote, "He knows what I mean when I say, 'Sweetheart, I'm not a sabre tooth tiger.'"
Ebehardt wrapped up her excellent answer by saying that she and her son are "muddling through this crazy puberty thing" together, and that she's "completely confident that he'll come out the other end a sweet, wonderful young man."
It's always so helpful to see examples of good parenting in action. Ms. Eberhardt's response is something all parents can tuck away for the appropriate time. It's also a great reminder that our tweens aren't trying to try us—they're just trying to get used to their new and improved brains.
This story originally appeared on 1.05.19
“I’m not a millionaire ... I just live full-time on cruise ships.”
Giving it all up and retiring to live on a cruise ship at 32 seems like a lifestyle choice only available to the ultra-wealthy. However, two financially savvy retired school teachers from Tennessee have managed to do just that, spending under $10,000 for the first eight months at sea.
Monica Brzoska, 32, and Jorrell Conley, 36, met in 2015 while teaching in Memphis, Tennessee. The following year, they booked a week-long cruise to Mexico, Belize, and Grand Cayman. After that, they were hooked on cruising together.
Eight years later, in March 2023, they booked a week-long Caribbean cruise. When it was over, instead of returning home to Memphis, they had a wild idea: Why not continue to book consecutive cruises? So, they did just that.
Monica was inspired to start living the life she always wanted after her father fell ill and her mother told her: "Don't wait for retirement. Follow your dreams."
The couple crunched the numbers and found that if they chose the cheapest cabins and used the deals they’ve received from Carnival Cruises, they could book the first 8 months for just under $10,000. “It sounds mad, but the numbers made sense. Accommodation, food and entertainment would be included – we’d only need spending money,” Brzoska told The Sun. “And because we’d been on so many Carnival cruises, we’d earned access to some amazing offers.”
Hopping from ship to ship isn’t difficult for the couple because many disembark from the same ports. But they sometimes have to fly when they can’t walk to the next ocean liner.
The couple then quit their jobs, sold their possessions, and started a new life on the high seas. They rent out their 3-bedroom home in Memphis to maintain steady cash flow. The average 3-bedroom home in the area rents somewhere between $1200 to $1900 a month.
Over the first year of their new life, the couple completed 36 consecutive cruises. They have already visited countless destinations across the globe, but they can’t choose a favorite. "For a cultural experience, we loved Japan," Brzoska told a Carnival Cruise director on Instagram. The couple also loved Greece for its “history” and Iceland because it was the "closest to being on Mars."
One of the most incredible benefits of loving on a cruise ship is that so many things are taken care of for you. The couple never has to cook any meals, do any laundry or drive. Every night, there is something to do, whether it’s checking out a comedy show or enjoying drinks and dancing in the nightclub.
Plus, on cruises, just about all the costs are covered, so you rarely have to open your wallet. It’s a stress-free, all-inclusive lifestyle. Brzoska says that when you remove the everyday stresses from life, it’s great for your marriage. “Without the daily stresses of life, we rarely argued, but always told each other if we needed space or more time together,” she said.
The couple also makes sure to have one date night a week, during which they dress up and have a nice meal together.
Most people may be unable to give it all up and live their lives hopping from ocean liner to ocean liner. But there’s a great lesson in the story of Brzoska and Conley: You never know how much time you have left, so don’t wait for retirement to live the life of your dreams.
Upworthy has reached out to Brzoska for comment and is still awaiting a response.
Betsy and Irv are finally getting the happy ending they deserve. Together.
There’s a whole genre of music and movies dedicated to the idea of someone being swept off of their feet after circumstances tried to keep them from their true love. Romance novels could single handedly keep public libraries and bookstores afloat. Everyone loves "love" and the story of Betsy and Irv just takes the cake. Betsy Sailor attended Penn State University as a business major, which was almost unheard of in 1978 and Irv Pankey attended the university while playing football. The pair’s paths never crossed, until an unfortunate incident bonded the two forever.
That year, Betsy was at home singing and dancing with her refrigerator door as one does when looking for food, when she was sexually assaulted at knife point by none other than star Penn State football player, Todd Hodne. When Irv heard the evidence against Hodne during the trial, he knew he had to do something about it. In fact, he was the only one on the team who did.
He knocked on her door, introduced himself and offered to essentially be her protection as she traversed through campus. The pair were glued at the hip until graduation. Irv went on to play for the LA Rams and Betsy went on to work in human resources. They hadn't spoken since, until 44 years later when ESPN decided to cover their unique bond that helped Betsy get through college.
Hear directly from Betsy Sailor and Irv Pankey as they discuss their relationship in my recent interview with them (created by director @nicole_noren ): 12/12pic.twitter.com/GmWVIYp38O— Paula Lavigne (@Paula Lavigne) 1651148562
Irv and Betsy stayed in touch after the documentary was filmed, and when ESPN did an update, Betsy became emotional while talking about Irv. The two smiled and said they spend as much time together as possible. Irv said “We’re riding off into the sunset. Calling it a day. Peace out! I hope we can enjoy each other’s company for the rest of our lives and just move on,” He continued “We’re 65 years old. We ain’t got time to be messing around.”
If that isn’t a love story to write home about, then I don’t know what is. Best wishes Betsy and Irv. You both deserve a lifetime of happiness.
This article originally appeared on 04.29.22
Raul Torres is a guardian angel.
Becca Moore is a popular TikToker with over 800,000 followers who's known for her funny, laid-back takes on dating. Like any influencer-type she was at the Coachella music and arts festival in Indio, California recently. While she was at Coachella, she was robbed of her phone, rental car keys and wallet.
“I went to Coachella this weekend and I thought this guy was kinda hitting on me but then he just robbed me,” Becca says at the beginning of her three-minute TikTok video with over 3 million views. After the festival, she was left with no ride, money, or means to get in contact with friends and family. She was stranded in the desert.
Becca’s friend’s hotel called her an Uber so she could get to a local store to buy a new phone.
“A normal Uber driver takes you to a place and then drops you off. He insisted on coming in with me and making sure that I was going to have a ride after that,” Becca said.
The store wasn’t able to get her a new phone because she didn’t have access to her current plan. But Raul wouldn’t give up, so he took her to the local police station where they were able to locate the Airbnb where the thief was staying. The police let them into the room and they searched it but couldn’t find the phone.
@becccamooore the uber driver that saved me from going missing is @buds4u559!! 😭 after spending the day w him he told me his daughter is a senior in high school & is having a hard time going through chemo. i made a gofundme, he could’ve left me and didn’t have to help me the way he did! I’d love to help his fam give his daughter a normal end to her senior year of high school this year (prom!!) i’m putting it in my bio!!
After the big let-down, Becca and Raul decided to take a break from their quest and refresh their spirits with some margaritas, on Raul. “Just because he’s an angel on this Earth,” Becca said in her TikTok video.
“He told me all he wants is for his daughter to have a normal end to her senior year, and to be able to go to big events like prom and graduation,” Becca said.
Raul also revealed that his father had cancer as well.
His revelations put Becca's troubles in perspective and made his decision to drop his driving for the day to help Becca all the more incredible.
@becccamooore thank god he refused to leave me 😭 raul’s tiktok is @buds4u559. also you can donate to the fam in my bio!! thank you all for your donations and generosity. you today, me tomorrow!! #TipsForRaul
After the final slurps of their margaritas, Becca still wasn’t sure how she’d get home. But Raul wouldn’t give up. “We’re getting your phone,” he exclaimed.
Becca believes the robber abandoned the phone after realizing the police were involved. Then, Raul helped Becca get a rental car so she could get home. Before saying their goodbyes, the two had spent eight hours together.
"Raul ended his Uber shift that morning to spend his day helping me, expecting nothing in return,” she said in her TikTok video. So she used her considerable audience to ask followers to help contribute to a GoFundMe page for Raul and his family. Over the first 4 days, the campaign has raised over $144,000.
"When I was in the car with him it seemed like we were both so focused on my situation. We were only talking about me getting a phone and like things that did not matter. And he completely glazed over the fact that his daughter and his dad were the ones that needed help," she admitted.
On Friday, April 29, Raul's dad passed away from cancer.
The story of Becca and Raul is a great reminder that no matter how big our troubles seem, it’s always important to put them in perspective.
This story originally appeared on 05.03.22