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5 ways Obama is using $118 million to improve the lives of women of color.

The White House has a $118 million plan to improve the lives of women and girls of color.

The White House unveiled a five-point plan in November aimed at helping women and girls of color.

The plan is part of an effort by the Obama administration to address the unique challenges facing women and girls of color, tackling topics like health care, violence, economic development, criminal justice, and media representation.

For those of us (like myself) who aren't women of color, it's easy to gloss over these challenges — so let's pay attention.

I know some people will be thinking, "Why not just have a summit about the struggles that affect all of us? Why not just all people?"

The answer to that is simple: because we're always talking about all people. If we want to find solutions, and not just platitudes, we need to look at the issues on a closer level.

Here's what the White House hopes to accomplish. It's worth listening to.

Many of these are issues that affect people of all races and genders but which make success particularly difficult for women and girls of color.

Obama senior advisor Valerie Jarrett, shown here in a November 2013 photo, was one of roughly 40 speakers at the summit. Photo by Olivier Douliery-Pool/Getty Images.

1. Address the racial and gender disparities that affect what kind of education our children receive.

One of the biggest issues is how school discipline is handled. Data shows that girls of color are disproportionately targeted for things like detention and suspension.

"Black girls are suspended at higher rates (12%) than girls of any other race or ethnicity and at higher rates than white boys (6%) and white girls (2%)," reads a statement on the White House's website. "American Indian/Alaska Native girls are also suspended at rates that exceed those of white students."


How do we address this? Well, one of the suggestions put forward by the Obama administration is additional funding to study the root causes in these disparities. What we do know is that when students aren't in school as the result of suspension or expulsion, they're not learning; when they're not learning, that sets off a whole chain of not-so-great things.

2. Invest in programs to end the school-to-prison pipeline.

"In 2013, black females were nearly three times as likely as their white peers to be referred to juvenile court for a delinquency offense," reads a Department of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention report.

Last year, the Obama administration released guidelines to support at-risk girls — in particular, to help keep those involved in school discipline or sexual abuse from ending up in prison.


3. Promote diversity in science, technology, engineering, and math (STEM) programs.

In a look at 2012 data on science and engineering degrees, minority women accounted for just 11.2% of bachelor's degrees, 8.2% of master's degrees, and 4.1% of doctorate degrees.


One of the administration's educational goals has been to help spark interest in the sciences at an early age. That's certainly a start to addressing these problems.

4. Provide programs, resources, and education to reduce unplanned teen pregnancies.

Teen pregnancies have been on the decline! Go us! However ... the White House acknowledges that "black and Latina girls remain more than twice as likely as white girls to become pregnant during adolescence." As teen mothers are less likely than their peers to graduate from high school (just half of teen moms graduate by the time they turn 22), this feeds into some of the aforementioned challenges.


While programs like those run in Colorado have been a huge success, the White House's latest move could be just as helpful. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention will spend $9.75 million to ensure public health centers are up to standards — complete with accurate, comprehensive material surrounding sex ed. Oh, and they made a teen pregnancy prevention app!

5. Address the wage gap in both gender and race.

Yes, the wage gap exists. Usually, though, we just hear about the difference between what men make and what women make. The truth is that if you factor in race, it's even worse. For example, check out this chart from the American Association of University Women.


That's ... not good, and we need to do something about it. On the White House's end, the president is recommending making permanent some of the tax cuts set to expire in 2017 and pushing to bring paid family leave to the U.S. Just as big, however, was Friday's announcement that the Ms. Foundation and Prosperity Together announced a five-year, $100 million commitment to fund programs to help low-income women find success.


Can the issues discussed be fixed in a day? Of course not. But these are some real, actionable steps. And that's great.

The intersection of racism and sexism is one of those areas that seems to get left behind in much of the "American Dream"-type talks and debates we hear politicians talk about. That's what makes today so different. For one powerful day, the focus was on those who so frequently get stepped on, talked over, and pushed away from policy conversations.

The women in attendance at the summit came ready to set the agenda. Now it's our responsibility as a country to help see it through.

We should look to those like Melissa Harris-Perry, Loretta Lynch, Valerie Jarrett, and all the other women who spoke at the conference as inspiration to fight racism and sexism wherever we see it through society and ensure that future generations are offered the same opportunities as their peers regardless of race or gender.

U.S. Attorney General Loretta Lynch is the first black woman to hold that office. Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images.

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Humor

Comedian nails the differences in how each generation arrives at someone's home

"Millennials will arrive late, but they will text you to let you know they're on their way, just as they're about to get into the shower."

Samuel Peter/Pexels

Boomers will knock. Loudly. At all hours.

There's no doubt that there are contrasts between the generations, as baby boomers, Gen X, millennials and Gen Z see and experience the world quite differently. While generation gaps have always existed, the tech age has widened those gaps in big ways, which sometimes creates challenges but often results in hilarity.

For instance, watching a Gen Zer try to figure out how to use a rotary phone is pure entertainment. The way emojis are used and interpreted varies vastly by age, making for some chuckle-worthy communication mishaps. Slang terms can be hard to keep up with the older you get, but they can also be manipulated by savvy elders to great comedic effect.

gen z slang, w rizz, generations, generation gap, generational differences Riz W Sign GIF Giphy

And now, comedian Jake Lambert is comparing how the different generations arrive at someone's house in a viral video that's been viewed more than 12 million times.

"You've basically got boomers who will turn up completely unannounced any time from about 7:00 in the morning and they will knock on your door just slightly louder than the police using a battering ram carrying out a house raid," Lambert begins.

"And then you've got Gen X. They would have made the plans well in advance, and they would've also checked in a couple of days before just to make sure the plans are definitely still happening," he goes on. "You see, Gen X is the forgotten generation and they're so scarred by this title they would've assumed that you'd forgotten not only about the plans but about their very existence."

"Millennials will have hoped that the plans would've been canceled. There's no reason that a millennial will ever actually want to come to your house," he continues. "They will arrive late, but they will text you to let you know they're on their way, just as they're about to get into the shower. And a millennial will never knock on your door. You'll just get a text either saying 'here' or 'outside,' and that's your cue to go and let them in."

"Similarly, Gen Z will never actually knock," he concludes. "But the chances are they won't have to, as they would have been documenting the entire journey from their house to yours, maybe even on Facetime using this angle [camera facing directly up at the chin] as they go along for some reason. Either that or they'll just send a picture of your front door or a selfie of them outside it. And again, just like the millennial, that's your cue to go and rescue them from the outside world."

gen z, selfie, generation gap, generational differences, generations Gen Z will send a selfie from outside your house as an indicator that they've arrived. Photo credit: Canva

People feel alternately seen, attacked and validated by Lambert's assessments, with the most common response being "accurate."

"I‘m a millennial, my husband GenX. Scarily accurate! 😂"

"Described this millennial to a T."

"This is surprisingly accurate 😂 I laughed slightly louder than the police using a battering ram…"

"Sooo accurate…guilty of the lateness and ‘here’ text 🙃"

"I must admit I'm a millennial. But knocking on the door feels so aggressive, uknow? 😅😇"

"Millennial texting to say almost there but just started getting dressed to go out. Why do we do this? It's not intentional, at least not for me."

millennial, ok boomer, generation gap, generational differences, generations Giphy

"Honestly your observations are just brilliant! GenX-er here!"

"The Gen Z angle omg. 😂😂"

Naturally there are some people who don't resonate with their generation's description, but there are exceptions to every rule and some people will never fit a stereotype. However, judging by the wave of affirmative responses, Lambert has nailed the generational generalities across the board—and done so in a way that allows us all to laugh at ourselves.

You can follow Jake Lambert on Instagram.

This article originally appeared last year.

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People share the moments they felt the most joy with no sex, drugs, or alcohol involved

This is just so wholesome.

Photo credit: Canva

Sometimes happiness is right at our fingertips.

Historically speaking, sex, drugs, and alcohol have been humanity’s go-to dopamine spiking refuges, a short-lived opportunity to feel pure, unadulterated pleasure, in spite of Mother Nature deciding it plays second fiddle to survival and procreation. However, we know these pleasure sources often aren’t as pure as they seem inherently, since they can lead to addiction.

And yet, judging from the truly wholesome answers to this Reddit question:

“What's the purest joy you've ever felt without intimacy, substances, or alcohol?”

…we are offered the reminder that maybe joy isn’t so elusive after all. And in fact, it comes to us, in the simplest of ways. Which can be a bit of a relief for those of us still convinced that happiness lies just on the other side of that goal post.

Below are some of our favorite answers. You’ll definitely notice a few major themes, but hopefully the biggest takeaway of all will be the reminder that in many ways, happiness is waiting to be felt by us. And maybe feeling a bit happier is only one hug, laugh, or sunset away. .

The wonders of nature

happiness, sex, drugs, alcohol, sober living, sobriety, psychology, psychology of happiness, ask reddit A person basking in nature. Photo credit: Canva

“Seeing the sea for the first time.”

“For me, it was watching a sunrise on a quiet morning—just the colors, the stillness, and knowing the world was waking up. Pure, simple joy.”

“When I first saw a desert, it was honestly depressing. But then night fell and I saw the bands of the milky way galaxy.”

“I had never seen fireflies in real life but got to see them when my daughter was five. I wish I had a picture of my daughter’s face when we had one flashing and crawling up my shirt…We got to experience it together for the first time. If my memory starts to fade I hope that one is last to go!”

“When I was 24…I had just gone through a lot of BS…and was dealing with severe abandonment issues. I was casually seeing a guy and a friend of ours was moving to Washington and needed a ride. So we offered. Very long story short, shit hit the fan. We ended up penniless with nowhere to go…and randomly stumbled on this alpaca homestead that also provided camping…we spent the next few weeks working for them during the day…I mainly worked on the lawn…weeding this plot of land in front of their big log cabin.Every day I worked on the land and just thought about all the things that used to torment me…I eventually became grateful for every single thing that happened in my life, I was grateful for the good and bad. I just felt complete peace and acceptance. I was content for the first time in my life.

Things started randomly coming together…Every single thing we needed was provided in the most insane ways…Before, it was impossible to be alone with my own thoughts. After…I knew that there was something bigger than me…I knew beyond any doubt that true gratefulness connected me with it…I don't think that would have happened if I wasn't so immersed in nature, either. It was like the physical and spiritual connected to allow me to find myself. I swear I'm not a hippy 😂 I just think that radical love for yourself and radical gratefulness leads to some very incredible places that you can't reach otherwise.”

“I was snorkeling alone in a bay off a small Greek island. Suddenly there was a huge shoal of sardines all around me. There must have been thousands of them. I kept taking huge breaths and swimming underwater amongst them for as long as I could hold my breath. It was incredible, like a dream. Almost as if I was flying with a flock of birds. I swam with them as long as I could until they headed for deeper water.”

Second chances

happiness, sex, drugs, alcohol, sober living, sobriety, psychology, psychology of happiness, ask reddit Two people hugging.Photo credit: Canva

“When my parents were on the verge of separation I was very sad for a whole week and I was just trying to process how our lives are going to change forever. One evening my mom, my sis and I were talking about this whole mess and at the exact moment my father opened the door and there was awkward silence because mom and dad weren't talking at all. Suddenly everyone laughed at the awkwardness of the situation and that's when it hit me that ‘this is probably the last time we are laughing as a family of 4…’While laughing I burst into tears because I felt pure joy and peace I was missing for the past week and that day I understood the value of having a loving family. Luckily my parents didn't separate and things are better now.”

“Riding a horse again after being wheelchair-bound for five months.”

Being able to afford all your needs…because money does buy some happiness

“Last night, I went to Target, bought only what I needed, came home to my one bedroom apartment, changed into comfy clothes, lit a candle, and opened the window to a complete downpouring thunderstorm…I sat on the couch, watched a romance movie, ate dinner, my cat crawled her way into my arms and just purred next to my ear while I held her. I vacuumed, folded my laundry, put it away. Brushed my teeth and got into bed, and realized that not only do I have my own apartment to myself, I could still smell the aroma of dinner around and it smelled like HOME. After all the years of shitty roommates and being broke and working two jobs, I make enough to afford my own apartment…and have enough time to spend time enjoying it. I almost cried for joy.”

“I was in an accident and got a decent settlement when I was younger…For a couple years I was able to buy everything I needed, a lot of stuff I wanted, and spend money on my friends. Genuinely those years were the happiest I’ve ever been.”

Residual joy from someone else’s win

“I’m a software developer. During COVID, a close friend of mine got laid off from his job at a catering company.…I offered for him to live with me and my family during the pandemic rent-free and teach him how to code.For the following year and a half, I worked closely with him every single weekday; helping him through tutorials, projects, bugs, frustration, and moments of exasperation…After living with us for a year and a half and applying to over 600 jobs in the last 6 months, he finally got an offer as a software engineer, not only paying more than he ever made at a restaurant, but also with full benefits so he could get dental work done…getting this job meant that he was essentially set for life…The day I came home after he got the offer, we just laughed and cried and bro-hugged forever. It was one of the proudest moments of my life and I’ll never forget that feeling of truly lifting someone else up in a way that affects the rest of their life. This month marks his 3rd year into his engineering career and he is still killing it.”

“Hearing my wife was cured of cancer. Those words will forever be engraved in my memory and associated with pure joy”

“Watching my little boy ring the bell last week after beating cancer ❤️”

Kindness from strangers…especially in times of struggles

happiness, sex, drugs, alcohol, sober living, sobriety, psychology, psychology of happiness, ask reddit Two kids enjoying a milkshake. Photo credit: Canva

“Me and my brother were dirt poor, but we saved up enough money for a McFlurry. We were at the McDonalds door counting up our coins to make sure we had enough. I went in, payed for the McFlurry with exact change, the person at the register saw my brother waiting outside by the door, she handed me two. It felt like Christmas.”

Being the recipient of unconditional love

“The day my niece, who had just learned to talk, saw me walk in the door and screamed my name before running up to hug me. Zero agenda, zero conditions.. just pure joy from someone happy I existed.”

“Being with someone I truly could be myself with. It lasted for only a few months, but I can't remember anything that comes close since.”

“I would have to say the private last dance at my wife and I’s wedding…We had a whole song just to ourselves and the emotions of the day overwhelmed me. I didn’t cry at the first look, but I cried then. I may have been a bit buzzed but the happiness I felt was profound.”

Earning the love of an animal

happiness, sex, drugs, alcohol, sober living, sobriety, psychology, psychology of happiness, ask reddit A sweet doggo. Photo credit: Canva

“The day my rescue dog laid her head on me to fall asleep after 2 years of work to help her”

“That feeling when a rescue finally trusts you is just unreal. My most recent cat hid under the bed for a few days and one night just randomly decided to come onto the bed and plop down right between my husband and I. I could've cried.”

“I had a rescue parrot…You could not look at him without him visibly trembling…And yet, I could see he wanted so badly to love and trust…I will never forget the first time I offered him my head, since he looked like he wanted to touch it, and he very roughly preened my hair…Once that particular threshold was crossed, he was the most love hungry member of our flock…You could not give him enough loving…I’ll always be grateful to have known and helped you, my dear Smudge.”

“I recently went back to Italy after being gone. The people that I thought would come to see me didn’t, and I was feeling a bit unwelcome. I went to my favorite bar/cafe/restaurant…After I sat down for about 5 minutes the bar’s cat was frantically meowing at me and trotting over to greet me. She remembered me :) I was so happy and the beginning of my stay was a lot better because I was feeling a bit alone and forgotten.”

Engaging the senses

“Fresh cool sheets on my bed with the windows open in the fall for a mid-day nap!”

“Playing live music. Being emotionally connected to a room full of people is an amazing feeling. And of course everyone likes being clapped at.”

And last, but certainly not least—seeing the world

happiness, sex, drugs, alcohol, sober living, sobriety, psychology, psychology of happiness, ask reddit Someone seeing the world. Photo credit: Canva

“Traveling. The pure excitement of being in a new country, taking everything in and seeing what kind of adventure unfolds. Especially true for my first solo trip 10 years ago when I had wanted to travel forever and finally did, despite people telling me not to.”

May we all find one simple thing to bring us pure joy just like this today.

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Heroes

Man finds genius loophole to beat squatters at their own game. Homeowners say he's a hero.

"All I'm doing is becoming a squatter and flipping this process on them."

Canva Photos

Flash Shelton has been nicknamed the "Squatter Hunter" and helps people take their homes back.

Squatters' rights laws are some of the most bizarrely misused legal realities we have, and something no one seems to have a good answer for. Most of us have heard stories of someone moving into a vacant home and just living there, without anyone's permission and without paying rent, and somehow this is a legal question mark until the courts sort it out.

According to The National Desk, squatters' rights are a carryover from British property law and were created to ensure that abandoned property could be used and to protect occupants from being kicked out without proper notice. The argument is that it's better to have someone openly living in a home and taking care of it, properly maintaining it, versus it laying abandoned and rotting away. Families and residents add value to a community, and those residents should have rights — or so the reasoning goes.

It should go without saying that squatter law isn't meant to allow someone to just take over someone else's property, but sometimes that's exactly what happens.

A squatter takeover is exactly what happened to Flash Shelton's mother when she put her house up for rent after her husband passed away.


A woman contacted her with interest in the property, only she wanted to do repairs and look after the home instead of paying rent. Before anyone knew it, she had furniture delivered (which she later said was accidental) and set up camp, despite Shelton's mom not agreeing to the arrangement.

But since the woman had expressed her intention and already moved in, the matter was out of police hands, as Shelton found out when he tried to contact the local sheriff. If that sounds like trespassing to you, well, join the club.

“They said, ‘I’m sorry but we can’t enter the house, and it looks like they’re living there, so you need to go through the courts',” he shared in a YouTube video.


Shelton rightfully didn't want the expense of a court battle, so he took matters into his own hands—not with violence, but with logic. He had his mom lease the home to him, and then told the squatter that she had to move everything out because he was moving things in.


squatters, homeowners, criminals, trespassing, law, property law, viral videos, youtube, squatter hunter How exactly is squatting not trespassing? It's complicated, for some reason. Giphy

“If they can take a house, I can take a house," he said.

He was calm and clear about her having to get everything out within the day or he would have people come and take it, and thankfully, she didn't put up a big fight.

That experience made him realize how squatter law can be abused, but that there's a faster system for removing a squatter than to go through the court system. If a squatter can move in and force a homeowner to take them to court to prove they are living there illegally, then he could simply move in alongside the squatter, putting the squatter in the position of having to take the homeowner to court instead.

"The legal process is so slow, and at some point when they're in there, you're going to feel like they have more rights than you do and that's how you're going to be treated. So even though you it's your house and you're paying the mortgage or whatever, at some point squatters feel like they have more rights than you, so they don't have an incentive to leave until a judge tells them to, until they're actually ordered to, and that could take months."

After successfully removing the squatters in his mother's house, Shelton has been tackling similar squatter situations for other homeowners in California, earning him the nickname "The Squatter Hunter."

"All I'm doing is becoming a squatter and flipping this process on them," Shelton told CBS News. "I figured if they could take a house, I could take a house."

According to CBS, he's successfully removed a dozen squatters in the past year. ""I'm not going in and I'm not hurting anyone," he said. "I'm not kicking them out, I'm not throwing them out." He's literally just moving in himself, setting up cameras, and then creating small annoyances until the squatters get fed up enough to move out; like making uncomfortable alterations to the home or making a ton of noise at inopportune hours.

Shelton parlayed his success into a reality show on A&E called, fittingly, Squatters. It premiered in July of 2025. To put it lightly, it looks intense! Clips posted on Shelton's social media show hostile standoffs with angry squatters and even he and his team causing damage to the home or creating nuisances to help drive the squatters out.

California isn't the only state that has seen issues with squatters. There are squatter stories from all over the U.S. of people moving into a property and refusing to leave without a court order, tying owners up in lengthy, expensive legal battles.

Though squatting is relatively rare overall, some areas of the country have more issues than others. California, Texas, Georgia, and Florida are areas, in particular, that struggle with squatters and abandoned properties.

Shelton even has a Change.org petition to try to get squatter laws changed to "make squatting in residential maintained homes criminal." Making squatting illegal "will shift the burden of proof onto the squatter and make the crime punishable with restitution an option for damages," the the petition states.

Not all homeowners will have access to someone like Shelton and his team to fight back against squatters. But until the laws change, he's doing as much as he can.

Watch Shelton share his personal story:

- YouTube www.youtube.com

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.


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Delta flight attendant shares her weirdest passenger interactions and the stories are wild

You really get all kinds of characters on an airplane.

Photo credit: Canva

Flight attendants have stories for days.

In some ways, airplanes are a great equalizer. People from all economic brackets, political persuasions, cultures, and walks of life fly on planes occasionally, so every flight is like a mixed bag of humanity.

Flight attendants see it all and have to interact with the vast array of people in all their quirks on a daily basis. Their job requires providing friendly customer service and also keeping passengers safe, which isn't always easy. Naturally, most flight attendants have stories for days, but we're not always privy to them.

flight attendant, flying, airplane, airlines, air travel Flight attendants have to interact with all kinds of people every day.Photo credit: Canva

A flight attendant named Savannah is giving us an inside look at the weird, funny, and surprising interactions she has with passengers, and it is a hoot. Savannah works for Delta, and her "Life of a Flight Attendant" videos have become viral favorites. It all started with a TikTok video where she launched right in with a handful of brief anecdotes:

"A guy in first class asked if he could smoke a cigarette, and when I said no, he said, 'But I'm in first class.'"

"One lady asked why there was orange juice in her mimosa."

"When we landed it was still dark outside, and one guy literally asked me if our flight took that long cuz it was nighttime again. Mind you, we left at 5:00 a.m. for an hour flight."

@savannah0191

Replying to @Terry she did in fact choose to fly to atlanta :)

"I had to inform one lady that we weren't the only airline that allowed babies when there was a baby crying—mind you, for like 15 seconds—and she said she was never flying Delta again. Because of the crying baby."

"The lady's husband asked why there wasn't a dinner on a 45-minute flight. At 8:00 a.m."

Savannah shared that she's had multiple passengers walk into the bathroom barefoot or in socks. One little boy asked if she was related to Tarzan. One lady dropped her back on Savannah's foot and told her to "Take care of it." She's had people tell her to ask the pilots to turn off the engines because they are too loud.

And that's just Part 1. Savannah has made 15 of these so far and she's gathering more stories by the day.

@savannah0191

Replying to @Terry she did in fact choose to fly to atlanta :)

Here's one fan favorite from Part 15:

"We board in Minneapolis and this lady comes on, she's like, 'I can't find my seat,' and I said, 'Can I see your boarding pass?' She was like, 'Well, I'm at G18.'

I said, 'Ma'am, there's no G on this plane. It's ABC DEF.' And she was like, 'Yeah, but my boarding pass says G18.' And I said, "Oh, that's the gate. We're parked at G18. Can I see your boarding pass? I'll let you know what seat you're in.'

She was like, 'I want to sit at G18.'

'Well, that's inside the airport, up the jetbridge. Um, can I see your boarding pass, and I can just, um, let you know your seat number?'

'Well, I want to sit at G18 and I'm not sitting anywhere else.'

airport, airlines, airplane, flight gate, flight attendant G18 is a gate, not a seat, ma'am. Photo credit: Canva

'I'm gonna propose a solution. You can go sit at G18 in the airport or you can hand me your boarding pass and I can show you your assigned seat and you can go to Atlanta. So, I'm gonna leave it up to you—it's your call—n=but there isn't a G18 on this plane. I'm very sorry. If you do want to sit at G18, it is in the airport, okay?'"

Can you imagine having conversations like this on a daily basis?

Some of Savannah's stories are just delightful, such as the kid who tried to convince her to give him gummy bears while his mom slept beside him or the elderly man who recognized her from TikTok and pulled up her account to show her her own face.

@savannah0191

guaranteed that mom heard our whole conversation 🥲😅

Part of what people love about Savannah's storytelling is that she has great timing and facial expressions. But she also seems like a genuinely sweet person who is perfectly suited to her job, which is always lovely to see. You can't interact with humans all day without a sense of humor. You also can't do it without actually liking people in general. Based on Savanna's viral video from 2021 in which she explains what she thinks about passengers based on what they're wearing, she really is well suited to interact with people all day:

@savannah0191

welcome onboard 🥰🥰 #flightattendantlife #greenscreen

You can follow Savannah on TikTok for more.


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Shocking new poll shows just how incredibly sheltered kids are these days

Seventy-one percent of 8 to 12-year-olds have never held a sharp knife.

via Canva/Photos

A young boy staring at out the window.

If you compare parenting in 2025 to what it was in the ‘70s or ‘80s, there are some glaring differences. The first is that back in the day, kids were allowed to explore more on their own. It was common to see seven- or eight-year-olds walk home from school alone, and some were latchkey kids who came home to an empty house until their parents got home.

However, there has been a significant cultural shift, where the family has become increasingly centered around children, and parents are more concerned than ever about their kids’ safety. Even though the overall crime rate in America is much less than it was forty years ago. The effects of these changes are apparent in a shocking new Harris Poll about eight to twelve-year-old American children.

sad child, sheltered child, girl at window, depression, helicopter parent, stuck inside A young boy staring at out the window.via Canva/Photos

How sheltered are 8 to 12-year-olds?

45% have not walked in a different aisle than their parents at a store

56% have not talked with a neighbor without their parents

61% have not made plans with friends without adults helping them

62% have not walked/biked somewhere (a store, park, school) without an adult

63% have not built a structure outside (for example, a fort or treehouse)

67% have not done work that they’ve been paid for (e.g., mowing lawns, shoveling snow, babysitting)

71% have not used a sharp knife

The problem with raising sheltered kids

The poll results are alarming because children raised without freedom and real-life experiences are likely to have a tough life as adults. Sheltered children become adults who have a hard time making decisions, connecting with other people, and overcoming challenges. Sheltered children also grow up lacking individuality and confidence. It seems that the intense need to protect children winds up making them terrified as adults.

dorm room, college girls, girls studying, college life, bedroom, College girls in a dorm room.via Canva/Photos

How to raise children who aren’t sheltered

Jonathan Haidt, social psychologist and author of The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness, says one way to raise confident, independent children is to give them jobs outside of the house. "Practice letting your kids out of your sight without them having a way to reach you. While you cook dinner for your friends, send your kids out with theirs to the grocery store to pick up more garlic—even if you don't need it,” he told NPR.

Haidt believes that when children are seen walking to the store to get milk, it transforms them, as well as the community. “The brilliant part of this challenge is that it changes the norms. Before you know it, it's normal to see an eight-year-old carrying a quart of milk. It's normal to see a nine-year-old on a bicycle—that's how you change the norms,” Haidt continues.

kid shopping, independant kid, boy, boy with pineapple, boy in grocery store A young boy shopping at a grocery store.via Canva/Photos

He also suggests that parents should print out kids' licenses, similar to the ones available here, so they can demonstrate their independence if questioned by adults.

Raising kids who are resilient, capable, and emotionally mature begins when parents loosen their grip and allow them more freedom and trust. For many, this may run counter to their instincts, but it's necessary to raise well-rounded kids. Furthermore, in a world where many children are sheltered, those with a greater sense of individuality and confidence will have a distinct advantage when they enter the hyper-competitive adult world. In the end, well-adjusted competent adults are built not by shleting kids, but by setting them free.

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