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11 things you can do to have a Thanksgiving in the true spirit of the holiday.

This Thanksgiving, let your belly be full of love and gratitude ... and pie.

11 things you can do to have a Thanksgiving in the true spirit of the holiday.

The first time a bunch of immigrants and locals got together in the U.S. to eat some home-cooked fowl, it was 1621.

And, according to some historians, it was more like a big, loose, last-minute festival than a fancy sit-down dinner.


This "First Fun Thanksgiving" image via Mike Licht/Flickr (based on original by Jean Leon Gerome Ferris).

They probably didn't even eat turkey! Mostly, they were just really happy to have enough food to eat because life in the new world was rough.

This year, to have a holiday that celebrates this gorgeous season, honors the food and history of our land, and feels full of love (instead of just plain full), here are some ideas to keep in mind:

First, forget the hype and reconnect with the real.

1. Make your understanding of the holiday as rich and studied as the menu.

Why? Because this holiday has a pretty special history! The very first recorded "Pilgrims and Indians" feast, for example, is a happy story, but later meals have a sad and gruesome meaning.

And do you even know that first tribe's name? It's the Wampanoag! Here's a great great summary with some startling information in it and links to learn even more.

And while you're at it, you can teach your kids a real-er story about our country.

This version, for example, is kid-oriented, brain-stimulating, and will make for some cool dinner conversation with the whole family. And you can freak them out with the picture of eel pie.

2. Get your 1621 vibe on.

Think about what that first harvest festival was like. Nathaniel Philbrick points out that to all the pilgrims from Great Britain, where fall is kind of ho-hum, the New England trees turning color would have been shocking and awesome.

Hear his take on the history, in parts 1 and 2. What kind of autumnal appreciating can you do where you are?

3. Try an actual recipe from a Native American tribe.

Slow Food USA offers this neat interactive map and collection of recipes, many of them from Native tribes, organized by region.

Photos from SlowFood USA, used with permission.

When you serve your Wampanoag stewed pompion, add some dinnertime trivia, courtesy of Smithsonian: The first Thanksgiving couldn't have had pumpkin pie as we know it, because they didn't have butter or wheat to make pie crust.

Speaking of planning that menu...

4. Up your veggie-to-meat ratio!

Image by Rebecca Siegel/Flickr.

Whether you're having bacon on your Brussels sprouts or not, you can shop for food that's been raised in a way that cares for the earth. What we eat affects the climate, and raising animals can be tough on a planet! Green things up with gosh-I'm-so-thanksgivingful- for-the-bounty-of-the-earth gusto.

5. Make your turkey a marvel.

For example, you can use this search tool to find a grocery store near you that'll offer Certified Humane poultry. Or get Pilgrim-y and get a heritage turkey. (Again, makes for great table conversation.) Get the whole low-down on turkeys from this this guide.

6. Keep it local.

This is seriously the holiday to support farmers in the region where you live — it's a holiday all about their harvest! See if your grocery store has a "local" section, or find a nearby farmers market. Learn more about where our food's coming from and how to have a 100-Mile Thanksgiving from these rad stats and infographics.

That's a long trip for a little broccoli stalk! Infographic by Sustainable America, used with permission.

7. If it came outta the earth, put it back in!

In other words, compost your potato peels. You know what the Pilgrims always said? "Waste not, want not." Well I'm not sure they said it, but I bet they lived it. Bag up all your veggie trimmings and stems and leaves — and stuff that fell on the ground — as you go, stick it in your freezer, and then take it to a compost collection center near you. I used to promise myself I'd make soup stock with all that stuff, but I'm so tired of cooking after Thanksgiving that I prefer composting the food waste. It helps me feel like I'm respecting the food I'm making not to send any of it into a landfill.

8. Drink well! How about some apple cider from local apples? Or wine grown ecologically?

For guaranteed holiday cheer, my recipe is apple cider from the farmers market, heated on the stove with a cinnamon stick and spiked with bourbon. But if wine's your thing, check out the free guide you can get from Slow Wine.

Finally, make the day after Thanksgiving more wonderful, too.

9. Make better use of that Friday.

Celebrate Buy Nothing Day by … buying nothing. Suggested alternatives to violent stampeding at the mall? A lo-o-o-o-ng walk, catching up on a stack of magazines, a game of soccer or touch football, making an overdue phone call, or finally attempting to make that soup stock with your leftovers.

10. Spend that time with people, places, or things that make you feel grateful.

Need inspiration? Check out the 365 Grateful project.

Just one example of gratitude from 365 Grateful's Facebook page. Photo used with permission.

11. Really commit to your community.

Lots of us suddenly remember how lucky we are, and want to give back by volunteering on Thanksgiving, but places need help year-round. (In fact, many say they can't even offer volunteer shifts to all the people who want to come during the holidays.) Commit to sowing the seeds of gratitude and community throughout the year, with a group you feel as warm and gooey as sweet potatoes about.

And finally, remember to say thanks — to the person cooking dinner or bringing over a side dish, to the grocery clerk, to your ride home, and to whomever you're thankful for now and throughout the year.

Courtesy of Amita Swadhin
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In 2016, Amita Swadhin, a child of two immigrant parents from India, founded Mirror Memoirs to help combat rape culture. The national storytelling and organizing project is dedicated to sharing the stories of LGBTQIA+ Black, indigenous people, and people of color who survived child sexual abuse.

"Whether or not you are a survivor, 100% of us are raised in rape culture. It's the water that we're swimming in. But just as fish don't know they are in water, because it's just the world around them that they've always been in, people (and especially those who aren't survivors) may need some help actually seeing it," they add.

"Mirror Memoirs attempts to be the dye that helps everyone understand the reality of rape culture."

Amita built the idea for Mirror Memoirs from a theater project called "Undesirable Elements: Secret Survivors" that featured their story and those of four other survivors in New York City, as well as a documentary film and educational toolkit based on the project.

"Secret Survivors had a cast that was gender, race, and age-diverse in many ways, but we had neglected to include transgender women," Amita explains. "Our goal was to help all people who want to co-create a world without child sexual abuse understand that the systems historically meant to help survivors find 'healing' and 'justice' — namely the child welfare system, policing, and prisons — are actually systems that facilitate the rape of children in oppressed communities," Amita continues. "We all have to explore tools of healing and accountability outside of these systems if we truly want to end all forms of sexual violence and rape culture."

Amita also wants Mirror Memoirs to be a place of healing for survivors that have historically been ignored or underserved by anti-violence organizations due to transphobia, homophobia, racism, xenophobia, and white supremacy.

Amita Swadhin

"Hearing survivors' stories is absolutely healing for other survivors, since child sexual abuse is a global pandemic that few people know how to talk about, let alone treat and prevent."

"Since sexual violence is an isolating event, girded by shame and stigma, understanding that you're not alone and connecting with other survivors is alchemy, transmuting isolation into intimacy and connection."

This is something that Amita knows and understands well as a survivor herself.

"My childhood included a lot of violence from my father, including rape and other forms of domestic violence," says Amita. "Mandated reporting was imposed on me when I was 13 and it was largely unhelpful since the prosecutors threatened to incarcerate my mother for 'being complicit' in the violence I experienced, even though she was also abused by my father for years."

What helped them during this time was having the support of others.

"I'm grateful to have had a loving younger sister and a few really close friends, some of whom were also surviving child sexual abuse, though we didn't know how to talk about it at the time," Amita says.

"I'm also a queer, non-binary femme person living with complex post-traumatic stress disorder, and those identities have shaped a lot of my life experiences," they continue. "I'm really lucky to have an incredible partner and network of friends and family who love me."

"These realizations put me on the path of my life's work to end this violence quite early in life," they said.

Amita wants Mirror Memoirs to help build awareness of just how pervasive rape culture is. "One in four girls and one in six boys will be raped or sexually assaulted by the age of 18," Amita explains, "and the rates are even higher for vulnerable populations, such as gender non-conforming, disabled, deaf, unhoused, and institutionalized children." By sharing their stories, they're hoping to create change.

"Listening to stories is also a powerful way to build empathy, due to the mirror neurons in people's brains. This is, in part, why the project is called Mirror Memoirs."

So far, Mirror Memoirs has created an audio archive of BIPOC LGBTQI+ child sexual abuse survivors sharing their stories of survival and resilience that includes stories from 60 survivors across 50 states. This year, they plan to record another 15 stories, specifically of transgender and nonbinary people who survived child sexual abuse in a sport-related setting, with their partner organization, Athlete Ally.

"This endeavor is in response to the more than 100 bills that have been proposed across at least 36 states in 2021 seeking to limit the rights of transgender and non-binary children to play sports and to receive gender-affirming medical care with the support of their parents and doctors," Amita says.

In 2017, Mirror Memoirs held its first gathering, which was attended by 31 people. Today, the organization is a fiscally sponsored, national nonprofit with two staff members, a board of 10 people, a leadership council of seven people, and 500 members nationally.

When the pandemic hit in 2020, they created a mutual aid fund for the LGBTQIA+ community of color and were able to raise a quarter-million dollars. They received 2,509 applications for assistance, and in the end, they decided to split the money evenly between each applicant.

While they're still using storytelling as the building block of their work, they're also engaging in policy and advocacy work, leadership development, and hosting monthly member meetings online.

For their work, Amita is one of Tory's Burch's Empowered Women. Their donation will go to Mirror Memoirs to help fund production costs for their new theater project, "Transmutation: A Ceremony," featuring four Black transgender, intersex, and non-binary women and femmes who live in California.

"I'm grateful to every single child sexual survivor who has ever disclosed their truth to me," Amita says. "I know another world is possible, and I know survivors will build it, together with all the people who love us."

To learn more about Tory Burch and Upworthy's Empowered Women program visit https://www.toryburch.com/empoweredwomen/. Nominate an inspiring woman in your community today!

Gage Skidmore/Wikimedia Commons

Wil Wheaton speaking to an audience at 2019 Wondercon.

In an era of debates over cancel culture and increased accountability for people with horrendous views and behaviors, the question of art vs. artist is a tricky one. When you find out an actor whose work you enjoy is blatantly racist and anti-semitic in real life, does that realization ruin every movie they've been a part of? What about an author who has expressed harmful opinions about a marginalized group? What about a smart, witty comedian who turns out to be a serial sexual assaulter? Where do you draw the line between a creator and their creation?

As someone with his feet in both worlds, actor Wil Wheaton weighed in on that question and offered a refreshingly reasonable perspective.

A reader who goes by @avinlander asked Wheaton on Tumblr:

"Question: I have more of an opinion question for you. When fans of things hear about misconduct happening on sets/behind-the-scenes are they allowed to still enjoy the thing? Or should it be boycotted completely? Example: I've been a major fan of Buffy the Vampire Slayer since I was a teenager and it was currently airing. I really nerded out on it and when I lost my Dad at age 16 'The Body' episode had me in such cathartic tears. Now we know about Joss Whedon. I haven't rewatched a single episode since his behavior came to light. As a fan, do I respectfully have to just box that away? Is it disrespectful of the actors that went through it to knowingly keep watching?"

And Wheaton offered this response, which he shared on Facebook:

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Images courtesy of Mark Storhaug & Kaiya Bates

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The experiences we have at school tend to stay with us throughout our lives. It's an impactful time where small acts of kindness, encouragement, and inspiration go a long way.

Schools, classrooms, and teachers that are welcoming and inclusive support students' development and help set them up for a positive and engaging path in life.

Here are three of our favorite everyday actions that are spreading kindness on campus in a big way:

Image courtesy of Mark Storhaug

1. Pickleball to Get Fifth Graders Moving

Mark Storhaug is a 5th grade teacher at Kingsley Elementary in Los Angeles, who wants to use pickleball to get his students "moving on the playground again after 15 months of being Zombies learning at home."

Pickleball is a paddle ball sport that mixes elements of badminton, table tennis, and tennis, where two or four players use solid paddles to hit a perforated plastic ball over a net. It's as simple as that.

Kingsley Elementary is in a low-income neighborhood where outdoor spaces where kids can move around are minimal. Mark's goal is to get two or three pickleball courts set up in the schoolyard and have kids join in on what's quickly becoming a national craze. Mark hopes that pickleball will promote movement and teamwork for all his students. He aims to take advantage of the 20-minute physical education time allotted each day to introduce the game to his students.

Help Mark get his students outside, exercising, learning to cooperate, and having fun by donating to his GoFundMe.

Image courtesy of Kaiya Bates

2. Staying C.A.L.M: Regulation Kits for Kids

According to the WHO around 280 million people worldwide suffer from depression. In the US, 1 in 5 adults experience mental illness and 1 in 20 experience severe mental illness, according to the National Alliance on Mental Illness.

Kaiya Bates, who was recently crowned Miss Tri-Cities Outstanding Teen for 2022, is one of those people, and has endured severe anxiety, depression, and selective mutism for most of her life.

Through her GoFundMe, Kaiya aims to use her "knowledge to inspire and help others through their mental health journey and to spread positive and factual awareness."

She's put together regulation kits (that she's used herself) for teachers to use with students who are experiencing stress and anxiety. Each "CALM-ing" kit includes a two-minute timer, fidget toolboxes, storage crates, breathing spheres, art supplies and more.

Kaiya's GoFundMe goal is to send a kit to every teacher in every school in the Pasco School District in Washington where she lives.

To help Kaiya achieve her goal, visit Staying C.A.L.M: Regulation Kits for Kids.

Image courtesy of Julie Tarman

3. Library for a high school heritage Spanish class

Julie Tarman is a high school Spanish teacher in Sacramento, California, who hopes to raise enough money to create a Spanish language class library.

The school is in a low-income area, and although her students come from Spanish-speaking homes, they need help building their fluency, confidence, and vocabulary through reading Spanish language books that will actually interest them.

Julie believes that creating a library that affirms her students' cultural heritage will allow them to discover the joy of reading, learn new things about the world, and be supported in their academic futures.

To support Julie's GoFundMe, visit Library for a high school heritage Spanish class.

Do YOU have an idea for a fundraiser that could make a difference? Upworthy and GoFundMe are celebrating ideas that make the world a better, kinder place. Visit upworthy.com/kindness to join the largest collaboration for human kindness in history and start your own GoFundMe.

Chris Evans is playing the lead role in the upcoming Pixar film "Lightyear."

Chris Evans was already skilled at squeezing hearts on social media, cavalierly sharing sweet pics of his adorable dog and piano-playing videos on Instagram, as if we could just casually watch him be a near-perfect man without swooning. And now he's being even more delightful with his gushing giddiness over getting to play his dream role.

The guy is already best known as the studly Marvel superhero Captain America, so what could possibly top that? Pixar, apparently. Evans' ultimate acting dream is being in a Pixar movie. And now that dream is coming true, the most eligible of the Chrises could not be cuter in his expressions of joy.

Sharing the new trailer for "Lightyear"—Pixar's origin story about the astronaut the Buzz Lightyear toy was based on in the "Toy Story" universe—Evans wrote on Twitter:

"I'm covered in goosebumps. And will be every time I watch this trailer. Or hear a Bowie song. Or have any thought whatsoever between now and July cause nothing has ever made me feel more joy and gratitude than knowing I'm a part of this and it's basically always on my mind."

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Cipolla's graph with the benefits and losses that an individual causes to him or herself and causes to others.

Have you ever known someone who was educated, well-spoken and curious, but had a real knack for making terrible decisions and bringing others down with them? These people are perplexing because we're trained to see them as intelligent, but their lives are a total mess.

On the other hand, have you ever met someone who may not have a formal education or be the best with words, but they live wisely and their actions uplift themselves and others?

In 1976, Italian economist Carlo Cipolla wrote a tongue-in-cheek essay called "The Basic Laws of Human Stupidity" that provides a great framework for judging someone's real intelligence. Now, the term "stupid" isn't the most artful way of describing someone who lives unwisely, but in his essay Cipolla uses it in a lighthearted way.

Cipolla explains his theory of intelligence through five basic laws and a matrix that he believes applies to everyone.

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