A Politician Pretends To Like Old People For 10 Seconds

That Phillip Mamouf-Wifarts makes a really good point, though.

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Gil Fulbright: Hi, I'm Gil Fulbright. The people that run my campaign, they've made this commercial and I'm in it. This campaign, its not about me, its about crafting a version of me that'll appeal to you. A version that visits random work sites with paid actors, pointing at things. A version of me that doesn't find old people loathsome or pointless. As a conventionally attractive, yet curious still family.

Listening to my constituents, legislating, these are things I don't do. What I do is spend about 70% of my time raising funds for reelection. I'd do anything to stay in office. My name's Gil Fulbright, but hell I'll change my name to Phil Gulbright or Bill Fulbright or Philip Mouthfulloffarts. These are the things that are important to me and these are the fine people that finance my campaign. Now in order to do these things, I have to stay in office. And to stay in office, I have to keep these guys happy.

Now if any of these things make these guys unhappy, well my hands are tied. So come November, the choice is clear. You want another spineless mouthpiece for special interests and lobbyists or a spineless mouthpiece for special interests and lobbyists? I'm Philip Mouthfulloffarts and I approve this message.

There may be small errors in this transcript.

This campaign was carefully crafted by experts. Check out the Honest Gil homepage if you get a chance.

Jul 11, 2014

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