What we can learn from what Kim Davis and the Pope did this week
Here are the do's and don'ts of faith, ripped from the headlines.
This week was a pretty big week for God in the news.
Well, OK. Maybe God wasn't the hot topic. But religion certainly was. There were two very big stories that seemed to have little in common, but both can teach us some important lessons about religion if we look closely enough.
The first was the saga of Kim Davis. The Kentucky clerk refused to do her job and sign marriage certificates for same-sex couples in the name of "conscience" and in doing so, she became a national symbol for anyone who opposes marriage equality on religious grounds.
Kim Davis at her church service, er, I mean, rally. Photo by Ty Wright/Getty Images.
According to Davis — who spent five days in jail and was greeted at her release by presidential candidate Mike Huckabee and hundreds of cheering, cross-waving supporters — it was her faith and her religious conviction that made her do it.
Contrast that with the second time that religion took center stage this week: Pope Francis encouraged every single Catholic parish in Europe to "take in one migrant family." The call to the region's approximately 120,000 parishes was made in response to the continent's ongoing refugee crisis, which has hit record levels and finally shocked the world into paying attention.
Photo by Vincenzo Pinto/Getty Images.
“In front of the tragedy of the tens of thousands of refugees escaping death by war or hunger, on the path towards the hope of life, the Gospel calls us, asks us to be 'neighbors' of the smallest and most abandoned." — Pope Francis
Why should we look at those two stories together? For sure, there are plenty of legal, political, and theological debates that can be had about both Kim Davis and Pope Francis.
But to me, the most interesting part of these two stories — and what connects them — is what they both can teach us about faith.
Strong faith can be a tremendous force for good in the world. It has helped provide education and basic needs for millions of people and has been a foundational component of civil and human rights efforts all around the world, the most famous of which is the 1960s American civil rights movement.
Photo via the Abernathy family/Wikimedia Commons.
But we also know that faith can be very dangerous. It has been used to justify things like slavery, the oppression of women, and most recently, the killing of gays all over the world.
How can something so good do such bad? Or, if you're not a person of faith, maybe you're wondering how something so bad can do such good.
Here's my theory.
I think of faith as the ideas and beliefs that people have about God. But religion is the tricky part — the rules and practices that humans created to figure out how to actually connect with their god.
In all the major world religions, the practices and rules were created in a very specific cultural context (like, for example, 2,000 years ago in "Bible times"). But when cultures change, which they're guaranteed to do, things get tough for religion.
The subtle signs of anti-gay protesters. Photo by Jenny Mealing/Wikimedia Commons.
The kind of faith that relies most heavily on religious rules often focuses on what I call the don'ts:
Don't legalize alcohol. Don't teach sex education. Don't legalize abortions. Don't be gay. Don't legalize marijuana. Don't let people get married. Don't [fill-in-the-blank].
When people of faith make their primary agenda item a don't in order to maintain the cultural status quo, it can:
- Oppress people and violate rights.
- Cause very real pain and harm in people's lives.
- Repel millions of people away from the idea of faith and God altogether.
Faith used in this way ultimately always loses. (See again slavery, prohibition, oppression of women, legalizing abortion, gay marriage, etc.)
That is the kind of faith we saw on display in Kentucky this week.
But when faith focuses on the do's — working to solve problems, meet needs, and serve others — it ultimately wins.
Yes, that is Mother Teresa. Because ... of course. Photo by Roslan Rahman/AFP/Getty Images.
The do's are actions and principles like these:
Do love your neighbor. Do feed the hungry. Do heal the sick. (Free health care anyone?) Do seek justice. Do practice humility. Do give more than you receive. Do take in thousands of refugee families.
Faith used in this way can:
- Remind us of the simple truths hiding beneath complex issues.
- Empower us to take concrete action in response to pain and injustice.
- Connect and draw people together across all divides.
The do's are where the magic happens. The do's are what we saw from the Pope this week. It's the do's that are currently behind the Moral Mondays movement for economic justice and the religious leadership in the Black Lives Matter movement, not to mention the thousands of organizations working to take care of the earth, provide for the homeless, and support women and families.
Kim Davis didn't save a life this week. The Pope just may have helped save thousands.
This tale of two acts of faith teaches an important lesson, not just for those of us who identify as Christian or religious, but for anyone looking for ways to use what they believe to make a difference. The world becomes measurably, tangibly, and practically better with the do's of faith. That, to me, sounds like a major win that all people — religious and not — can get behind.
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There's a reason why some people can perfectly copy accents, and others can't
Turns out, there's a neurodivergent link.
A woman in black long sleeve shirt stands in front of mirror.
Have you ever had that friend who goes on vacation for four days to London and comes back with a full-on Queen's English posh accent? "Oooh I left my brolly in the loo," they say, and you respond, "But you're from Colorado!" Well, there are reasons they (and many of us) do that, and usually it's on a pretty subconscious level.
It's called "accent mirroring," and it's actually quite common with people who are neurodivergent, particularly those with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). According Neurolaunch, the self-described "Free Mental Health Library," "Accent mirroring, also known as accent adaptation or phonetic convergence, is the tendency to unconsciously adopt the accent or speech patterns of those around us. This linguistic chameleon effect is not unique to individuals with ADHD, but it appears to be more pronounced and frequent in this population."
Essentially, when people have conversations, we're constantly "scanning" for information—not just the words we're absorbing, but the inflection and tone. "When we hear an accent, our brains automatically analyze and categorize the phonetic features, prosody, and intonation patterns," writes Neurolaunch. For most, this does result in copying the accent of the person with whom we're speaking. But those with ADHD might be more sensitive to auditory cues. This, "coupled with a reduced ability to filter out or inhibit the impulse to mimic…could potentially explain the increased tendency for accent mirroring."
While the article explains further research is needed, they distinctly state that, "Accent mirroring in individuals with ADHD often manifests as an unconscious mimicry of accents in social situations. This can range from subtle shifts in pronunciation to more noticeable changes in intonation and speech rhythm. For example, a person with ADHD might find themselves unconsciously adopting a Southern drawl when conversing with someone from Texas, even if they’ve never lived in the South themselves."
People are having their say online. On the subreddit r/ADHDWomen, a thread began: "Taking on accents is an ADHD thing?" The OP shares, "My whole life, I've picked up accents. I, myself, never noticed, but everyone around me would be like, 'Why are you talking like that??' It could be after I watched a show or movie with an accent or after I've traveled somewhere with a different accent than my 'normal.'
They continue, "Apparently, I pick it up fast, but it fades out slowly. Today... I'm scrolling Instagram, I watch a reel from a comedian couple (Darcy and Jeremy. IYKYK) about how Darcy (ADHD) picks up accents everywhere they go. It's called ADHD Mirroring??? And it's another way of masking."
(The OP is referring to Darcy Michaels and his husband Jeremy Baer, who are both touring comedians based in Canada.)
Hundreds of people on the Reddit thread alone seem to relate. One comments, "Omfg I've done this my whole life; I'll even pick up on the pauses/spaces when I'm talking to someone who is ESL—but English is my first language lol."
Sometimes, it can be a real issue for those around the chameleon. "I accidentally mimicked a waitress's weird laugh one time. As soon as she was out of earshot, my family started to reprimand me, but I was already like 'oh my god I don’t know why I did that, I feel so bad.'"
Many commenters on TikTok were shocked to find out this can be a sign of ADHD. One jokes, "Omg, yes, at a store the cashier was talking to me and she was French. She's like 'Oh are you French too? No, I'm not lol. I'm very east coast Canada."
And some people just embrace it and make it work for them. "I mirror their words or phrase! I’m 30. I realized I start calling everyone sweetie cause my manager does & I work at coffee shop."