upworthy

body positivity

Popular

Plus size figure skater with unreal moves is inspiring girls everywhere

So many kids have been told they can't figure skate because of their body shape. The doubters were clearly wrong.

Canva Photos

This figure skater is something else.

Is there anything more beautiful and graceful than ice skating? It's got the gorgeous aesthetics of gymnastics and dance combined with an almost other-worldliness as the skaters glide and fly around the ice. There's a reason people can't seem to look away from the rink when the winter Olympics roll around every couple of years.

However, the sports of ice skating comes with certain expectations of what the skaters body should look like. For women, most high level skaters are almost always extremely petite and slight. It stands to reason that this body type must be a requirement to perform at a high level, right?

Wrong. Laine Dubin is one skater who's out to prove that there's no "right way" for an athlete to look.

Dubin, most recently a student at Quinnipiac University where she was a standout on the skating team, began posting videos of her routines online in 2018. Believe it or not, she didn't set out to start a body-positive revolution—she just wanted to document her progress and free up some space on her phone,

But almost instantly, she began to develop a following. No one had ever seen anyone like her pulling off the moves that she could, all with so much personality and showmanship that sucked people in. Not only that, Dubin displays outstanding power and grace on the ice. If you've only ever watched the "prototypical" Olympic skaters perform, what Dubin does almost looks impossible. It's really amazing to behold.

One clip in particular recently went mega viral to the tune of over 30 million views:


@lainedubin

THE WINNER TAKES IT ALLLLLLLLL🏆🥇 🎥 @Emma #figureskating #figureskatingtiktok #iceskating #iceskatingtiktok #plussizefigureskater #figureskatingtiktoks #iceskater #figureskater #adultfigureskater #adultsskatetoo

Dubin has undoubtedly found her people on social media. The responses to her videos could bring tears to your eyes. Not only are viewers in awe of her skill on the ice, they find so much hope and inspiration in what Dubin is doing:

"Ok but as a bigger Asian girl who has always dreamed of ice skating this made me tear up 😭 so proud of you"

"I NEVER see plus sized rep in figure skating, YOU ARE INCREDIBLE THIS IS SO COOL!!"

"the fact no one knows how absolutely impressive this is especially with girls our size I love ice skating I've been a fan forever the power and strength you need to pull your up and spin like that"

"wait! someone with my body type figure skating?!!! like a GODDESS may I add, this makes me feel so seen, and like, maybe I could do this with some practice as well!!!!!???"

"As a plus sized girl who had the idea of figure skating shot down, thank you for making the lil girl in me happy and I'm so damn proud of you. You're awesome."

The comments just like these roll in on Dubin's videos every single day. But that doesn't mean that general attitudes across the sport are ready to change.

Women skaters, especially, are mercilessly mocked, fat-shamed, and picked apart by viewers, coaches, and even judges of the sport. Five-time Olympic medalist Tessa Virtue has dealt with people nitpicking her body her entire career, called either too fat or too muscular. Bronze medalist and two-time US National Champion Gracie Gold had to take a hiatus from the sport to get help with an eating disorder. One of the most promising young figure skaters in recent memory, Yulia Lipnitskaya, was forced to retire at just 19 due to anorexia along with injuries.

There are a lot of factors that contribute to this major problem. The norm is for female skaters in competition to wear incredibly skimpy dresses and outfits that accentuate their form and technique, which would make anyone self-conscious about their body. Canadian skater Kaetlyn Osmond adds that less body mass also helps them achieve sky-high jumps on the ice.

@lainedubin

the greatest thing you’ve ever seen since sliced bread🍞 (thats a joke people) #figureskating #figureskatingtiktok #iceskating #iceskatingtiktok #plussizefigureskater #figureskatingtiktoks #iceskater #figureskater #collegiatefigureskating

Dubin is living proof, though, that a plus-sized body can be athletic, graceful, and beautiful. It means so much to all the kids who think they shouldn't bother pursuing their love of the sport because their own body type will never allow them to fit in.

“It’s just people seeing representation in the media of themselves being represented first,” Dubin tells US Figure Skating. “That’s what will make people feel validated and that’s what will lead to change with body inclusivity in the skating space.”

The way she's racking up millions and millions of views, it's fair to say she—along with other plus-sized skaters—could have a real, tangible impact on the next generation of skating athletes.

This article originally appeared in April

Men's Health

Chiefs star Patrick Mahomes says his 'dad bod' may be the key to his incredible success

This inspired other dudes to jump in with their own epic dad bod tales.

Kansas City Chiefs Patrick Mahomes - Indianapolis Colts Ja… | Flickr

"That Dad Bod, man," Patrick Mahomes reportedly joked after he barreled his way into the end zone in a game against the San Francisco 49ers. According to an article by Rustin Dodd for The Athletic (owned by The New York Times), this is just one of many references to Mahomes's less-than-traditional athletic physique.

In the same article, Rams quarterback Matt Stafford's wife, Kelly, is quoted as having posted on Instagram, "Dad bod is a requirement to be an NFL QB. Show me a shredded QB, and I’ll show you a not very good QB.”

Patrick Mahomes Showtime GIF by Kansas City ChiefsGiphy

Clearly, Patrick and Matt are far from the only NFL superstar athletes without washboard abs—and this really is nothing new. From Peyton Manning to tight end Travis Kelce, the list is endless. Caleb Jones, an offensive tackle for the Patriots, weighs in at 370 pounds. Aaron Gibson, who once played OT for the Lions, Cowboys, Bears (oh my!) at one point weighed 410 pounds. (He's now retired and lost over 100 pounds to get healthier.)

But that's just football, where one could argue that a little more padding provides protection. Just recently, NBA player Luka Dončić got traded to the Lakers, despite his openly "unhealthy" lifestyle and being considered "overweight" by professional standards. Would he be a better player if he lost weight and stopped smoking? Not necessarily. Basketball stars through the years have often notoriously had "everyman" bodies and yet displayed amazing athleticism. And don't even get me started on baseball players.

Season 3 Baseball GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy

But some doctors warn that the dad bod (which is often used to describe men with a little extra weight in their midsections) can actually be a sign of poor health. Beer belly or just middle age, Dr. David Brill, in an article posted for the Cleveland Clinic, shares that a dad bod "left unchecked can lead to the three horsemen of the apocalypse: high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and high blood sugar."

Ours de la fête des pères avec de la biè Photo stock libre ...www.publicdomainpictures.net

In any case, this growing (pun intended) trend of a little extra teddy-bear fat in our jocks is inspiring all kinds of dudes on TikTok. Like Chill Guy 1, who posed sadly for the camera writing, "Strangers on the internet have commented on my weight gain." Only to cut to a guttural scream, while shirtless. There he proudly states, "F the haters! Love yourself always."


@chillary_chilton

Never let someone elses opinion determine how you feel about your body #fitness #wegojim #gym #dadbod #bodypositivity #selflove

And Supdaily, who exclaims, "I love food" while patting his round stomach.


@supdaily

Dad bod check #suchascientist #gummygame #foryoupage #fyp #dadbod #dadbodchallenge #dadbodcheck

Don't forget Logan Pete, who uses his dad bod as merely the vessel to share this inspiring message: "Oh hey, just some dad advice for anyone who needs it. You are a good person. You're trying your hardest. Your brain is just a jerk that plays tricks on you and tells you things that aren't true. And you probably deserve a cookie."

@logan_pete_

You got this kiddo! #dad #dadsoftiktok #dadbod #dadjokes #daddy

Dad bod squads are all the rage, and it doesn't seem to matter if you're just a person on TikTok or Taylor Swift's boyfriend's bestie. Dr. Brill added, “A chiseled body doesn’t have to be the goal. But there’s a sweet spot to be found. You don’t have to be ripped to be healthy."

Love Stories

'Fat girl meets hot guy' love story has happy ending and plenty of haters

This one's for anyone who's ever been told "you'd be so beautiful if only you lost a little weight."

Unsplash

Sierra Hufham was on vacation in the Dominican Republic when she got to chatting with a nice older couple by the pool. The three of them hit it off so well, Hufham — single at the time — decided to take a chance: "If you have any kids, I'm daughter-in-law material."

The couple introduced her to their son, Brandon, but there was a problem: “It was like, love at first sight. It was magical," she tells People. But..."I was shocked because he was this hot, ripped guy. And here I am, this big girl.”

The unspoken rules of our society dictate that a relationship like this could never work out, between a self-described fat girl and a fitness-obsessed dude with six pack abs. But a few years later, Sierra and Brandon got married and, despite the odds, they're happier than ever.

Sierra recently explained the ups and downs of her unique love story on TikTok, where it went viral.

Sierra shares her journey under the handle @the_fatgirldiaries. In her most popular clip, she bluntly asks and answers the question: "Can fat girls date hot guys?"

"The answer is 100% unequivocally Yes," she says. "Because I landed one."


Ariana Grande Singing GIF by The VoiceGiphy

"I don't want you to feel like if you are fat, that you are a fetish. Because you're just a person, you're a person just like a skinny girl. As a person you have personality, you have beauty, you have style, you have finesse just like a skinny girl does. So don't feel like anybody's out of your reach. Because they're not."

Sierra goes on to explain that she was told her whole life that she'd never be able to make an attractive man fall in love with her, and it took years and years of work to undo that programming and rebuild her confidence.

"[My own mother] used to say to me 'You know, you're so pretty but if you just lost 100 pounds, you'd be a knockout and then you could get a really good looking guy.' ... That ruined my self-esteem for a long time."

"But she was wrong 'cause I got literally like the hottest guy in the world and I'm 150 pounds heavier than him. And he loves me as I am and not as a fetish. You can land anybody you want to, weight is not the issue here. It's peoples mindsets and their hearts and that's what matters."

Watch the full video here:


@the_fatgirldiaries

Channeling my inner @Alicia Mccarvell for this one because her marriage inspires me daily and I feel such a similar way🫶🏼 My husband has loved me thin and he has loved me overweight. Because he fell in love with who I am as a person, my weight does not matter. My husband is into fitness and the personal training type world and it interests us both. Weight and food has always been my issue, but that doesn’t have anything to do with love, attraction, or our relationship. Yes, some of us have preferences and thats totally okay but in the end it should be all about the person’s heart and values, goals and dreams, humor and lifestyle, and thats what he fell in love with. I know that no matter my weight, this man supports and loves me and it is not a fetish of any kind. Its because we’ve invested and put effort into our relationship and built a beautiful life together. I couldnt be more thankful for this man and how he refuses to judge me. Yes, he wants me to be my healthiest, but that does not include a number on the scale. Ladies, you are all beautiful no matter your weight and you can land anybody you want to. The world is your oyster. Love goes beyond looks. Everything is about heart. Love you forever baby😘 #weightlossjourney #relatable #fat #fatgirl #plussize #biggirl #viralvideo #loseweight #diary #glp1 #glp1journey #tirzepetide #weightlosscommunity #glp1community #controversial #hubby


The video got over 800,000 views and counting, along with thousands of comments. The overwhelming majority showed Sierra really struck a cord with women everywhere.

Clearly Sierra isn't the only one who felt, or was repeatedly told growing up, that they'd never find love without losing weight.

"Literally the stuff my mom said to me wrecked me still 25 yrs later," one user wrote.

"My whole life has been 'You have such a pretty face, if you only lost X pounds...'" said another.

"This actually made me cry. I grew up in a household that said mean things like the things your mother said to u and it diminished my confidence. I’m working on my confidence. Thank you for this," another user added.

Comments just like this poured in over and over. Sierra's video was cathartic for so many women who had experienced the same struggles and were overjoyed to finally have some hope for their own happy ending.

@the_fatgirldiaries

Replying to @mvtroffa You all asked and I answered! Fat girls can get hot guys too! Dont count yourself out just because you are bigger! Your heart, personality and confidence are what is going to shine through. You deserve all the love in the world. #fatgirl #biggirl #relationshiptiktok #fyp #weightloss #fat #relatable #controversy #controversial #hubby #couplegoals

But Sierra says she gets plenty of haters, too, and lots of "rough" comments. But it doesn't stop her from continuing to spread her journey of acceptance, love, and positivity.

There's a ton of stigma around thinner men dating fatter women. Women like Sierra get told constantly that their "hotter" spouses can do better, will eventually cheat on them, or that they don't deserve the love that they've found. Fat women are expected to be grateful to get any attention at all and to accept poor treatment or even abuse in relationships.

Frustratingly, it doesn't really seem to go the other way. Larger men who date women who are thinner than them also receive scrutiny, but not nearly to the same level. In fact, they're more likely to get a high five for somehow pulling off such a coup!

Even some of those who aren't openly critical of Sierra's story remain skeptical. "Your husband is one in a million," a commenter wrote. "Most men don't like chubby. They don't look past the weight," said another. "Yeah they like use behind closed doors not in public," someone wrote.

Sierra, through her social media following, is out to prove those people wrong, and that weight is just a number. She believes confidence is the sexiest trait a person can have, and she's living proof that it just might be true.

Image from YouTube video.

An emotional and strong Matt Diaz.


Matt Diaz worked extremely hard to lose 270 pounds over six years.

But his proudest moment came in March 2015 when he decided to film himself with his shirt off to prove an important point about body positivity and self-love.

Matt had lap-band surgery in 2009 at age 16.

Through the course of his weight-loss journey, Matt became passionate about promoting body positivity for people of all shapes and sizes.
before and after weight loss photos of young man

Here's Matt at 16 years old and 497 pounds versus recently after his surgery — at 22 years old and 220 pounds.

Images via Matt Diaz, used with permission.

To stay motivated, he started sharing his journey on social media, posting before-and-after photos, answering questions and giving support to followers, and even sharing his meals and favorite workouts. Six years later, Matt is down over 270 pounds and is a very active voice in the online body-positivity movement.

But in all his years of sharing his story, the one thing he's never done is showed what his body looks like after 200+ pounds of weight loss. So he uploaded the video above to show his followers his true self.

man shows excess skin post weight loss

Sharing what happens with extreme weight loss.

Images via Matt Diaz, used with permission.

man crying beside comment

Working through fear...

Images via Matt Diaz, used with permission.

man crying beside comment

Loving myself.

Images via Matt Diaz, used with permission.

man crying beside comment

Scary and important.

Images via Matt Diaz, used with permission.

Shortly after he posted the video online, originally to Tumblr, it quickly went viral and garnered thousands of shares and comments from people around the web. I was one of the thousands touched by the video, so I reached out to Matt to find out more about what motivated him and what he hopes others can take away from his story. Here's what he had to say:

Upworthy (UP): Why was it so important for you to post this video?

Matt Diaz (MD): "I'm a really big advocate for self-love and body positivity. I think it's important that we learn to love the bodies we're in, even if we don't necessarily like every little thing about them. However, in the time I'd been writing and talking about it, I'd never actually shown my excess skin to anyone. It felt dishonest somehow, to others and to myself. I couldn't tell others that I wanted them to love themselves and keep myself hidden away and ashamed of my skin."

"I know what it feels like to hate your body, and to be depressed about it, and I never want anyone to feel that way again. So, if making myself vulnerable can help one person, why not?"

UP: What's the response been like? Anything particularly unexpected?

MD: "I think that putting any opinion on the Internet will garner a certain amount of negativity and cynicism, but I haven't seen anything like that at all. I've read every comment and message since the video has gone up, literally thousands, and they're all so thoughtful.

A really surprising side-effect were the number of transgender people who've thanked me saying that they understood my struggle, even though their body-related insecurity grew from different roots. I'd never even begun to [think] of what that must be like, and the fact that my message could help even though my problems began somewhere else is really incredible.”

UP: What advice or words of encouragement do you have for someone who's struggling to love their body?

MD: "I know it's difficult, especially when you're starting out. I want you to remember that you are not the problem, certain aspects of society are the problem. You'll constantly be told that you're too heavy or too tall to be attractive, or you're not masculine or feminine enough, or that your skin isn't the right tone or your hair isn't the right color, and these people are always always always wrong.

Luckily, we're slowly starting to see these ideas get phased out by modernity. Plus-sized, un-retouched models are getting more attention in major brands, more attention is being put on the alternative scene for high fashion, it's becoming clear that these negative ideas are not going to last, though it's going to take a while."

"Understand that to love yourself is to contest the negative things that were put into your head. Every smile, tattoo, bathing suit, and crop top is a small revolution. Tell yourself you're beautiful every day, and I promise you will be."

Watch video below:

Matt's story is a personal one, but it's one we can all learn from.

I think the most important thing to take away here is that self-love takes time and is different for everyone no matter what they look like. It's also worth noting that for Matt, losing weight was an important part of his journey, but that might not be the case for everyone. Even so, our society has such incredibly high and unrealistic body standards that even many of those who do work to lose weight end up feeling uncomfortable or being shamed for not having "perfect bodies" once they've lost weight.

There's no such thing as a "perfect body" because everyone is different, which is what makes us beautiful and great! I'm glad there are people like Matt in the world who are not only willing to share their stories but also to inspire others by showing that body confidence comes in all shapes and sizes, and that everyone deserves to feel good about who they are. Here's hoping Matt's inspiring words can help others begin to love and accept themselves, no matter where they're at in their journey.


- YouTube


UPDATE: In May 2016, Diaz, who now goes by they/them pronouns, underwent skin removal surgery with top New York City Plastic Surgeon, Dr. Matthew Schulman. They had 43 pounds of excess skin removed and appeared on Schulman's show, The Doctors, for their big reveal. Keep up with Diaz and their life on Instagram where they've recently shared their wedding. Congratulations!


This story originally appeared ten years ago.