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Ryan Reynolds calls wedding with Blake Lively at plantation 'a giant f__king mistake'

Ryan Reynolds calls wedding with Blake Lively at plantation 'a giant f__king mistake'
E! News/Twitter

Dominant culture in much of the U.S. has long romanticized grand, antebellum-era plantations as a throwback to a bygone era, conjuring up images of Gone With the Wind romanticism while glossing over the heinous slavery that took place on them.

Plantations, with their mansions, tree-lined driveways and well-kept grounds might make a visually stunning backdrop for an event, but the whole slavery reality gives "stunning" a whole new meaning. Ignoring that reality—which people have done for decades—produces pretty pictures, but when you fully acknowledge the horrible history of the ground you're standing on, it's hard to feel okay about using a plantation as a party venue.

When Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively held their wedding at Boone Farm, a South Carolina plantation, in 2012, they were likely looking through a fairly typical white American (or in Reynolds' case, white Canadian) lens. But in an interview with Fast Company, Reynolds expressed profound regret for their wedding location choice.

"It's something we'll always be deeply and unreservedly sorry for. It's impossible to reconcile. What we saw at the time was a wedding venue on Pinterest. What we saw after was a place built upon devastating tragedy. Years ago we got married again at home—but shame works in weird ways. A giant fucking mistake like that can either cause you to shut down or it can reframe things and move you into action. It doesn't mean you won't fuck up again. But repatterning and challenging lifelong social conditioning is a job that doesn't end."

Reynolds' acknowledgment could be viewed as lip service if it ended there. But it doesn't.

On the financial front, Reynolds and Lively made two $1 million donations to the NAACP Legal Defense Fund and the Young Center for Immigrant Children's Rights last year. They also donated an additional $200,000 to the NAACP Legal Defense Fund this May following the killing of George Floyd.

Though Fast Company says Reynold's is reluctant to talk about racism too much, for fear of being just another white celebrity drowning out voices of people of color, the star has used his social media platform to draw attention to social justice issues and encourage civic action through electing leaders that will make needed reforms in the justice system.

Regarding justice in the workplace, the actor, producer and entrepreneur also told Fast Company, "Representation and diversity need to be completely immersive. Like, it needs to be embedded at the root of storytelling, and that's in both marketing and Hollywood. When you add perspective and insight that isn't your own, you grow. And you grow your company, too."

Reynolds is backing that statement up with action as well. In an Instagram video last week, he announced the Group Effort Initiative, in which he will be using a portion of his salary on an upcoming film to bring in people from marginalized communities to work on the film, get paid for training, and gain valuable skills in the filmmaking industry.

It's one thing to recognize that you've done something insensitive or harmful. It's another to acknowledge it, learn from it, and make amends through real action. While we can't undo the past, we can all strive to build a more equitable and just future.



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Millennial mom asks her own mom about raising a kid in the 80s and is mortified

"What did you do without Google?!"

@thedailytay/TikTok

"My anxiety could not have handled the 80s."

Raising kids is tough no matter what generation you fall into, but it’s hard to deny that there was something much simpler about the childrearing days of yesteryear, before the internet offered a million and one ways that parents could be—and probably are—doing it all very, very wrong.

Taylor Wolfe, a millennial mom, exemplifies this as she asks her own mother a series of rapid-fire questions about raising her during the 80s and the stark contrast in attitudes becomes blatantly apparent.

First off, Wolfe can’t comprehend how her mom survived without being able to Google everything. (Not even a parent, but I feel this.)

“What did we have to Google?” her mom asks while shaking her head incredulously.

“Everything! For starters, poop!” Wolfe says. “Cause you have to know if the color is an okay color, if it's healthy!”

“I was a nursing mom, so if the poop came out green, it was because I ate broccoli,” her mom responds.

…Okay, fair point. But what about handy gadgets like baby monitors? How did Wolfe’s mom keep her kid alive without one?

“I was the monitor, going in and feeling you,” she says.

@thedailytay My anxiety would have hated the 80s. Or maybe loved it? IDK! #fyp #millennialsontiktok #parenttok #momsoftiktok #comedyvid ♬ original sound - TaylorWolfe

Could it really be that easy? It was for Wolfe’s mom, apparently. Rather than relying on technology, she simply felt her child and adjusted accordingly.

“If you were hot, you slept in a diaper. If you were cold, you had a blanket around you.” Done and done.

Wolfe then got into more existential questions, asking her mom if she ever felt the stress of “only having 18 summers” with her child, and how to make the most of it.

Without missing a beat, Wolfe's mother says, “It's summer, I still have you.”

Going by Wolfe’s mom, the 80s seems like a time with much less pressure.

From feeding her kids McDonald’s fries guilt-free to being spared the judgment of internet trolls, she just sort of did the thing without worrying so much if she was doing it correctly.

That’s nearly impossible in today’s world, as many viewers commented.

“Google just gives us too much information and it scares us,” one person quipped.

Another seconded, “I swear social media has made me wayyyy more of an anxious mom."

Even a professional noted: “As someone who has worked in pediatrics since the 80s, the parents are way more anxious now.”

I don’t think anyone truly wants to go back in time, per se. But many of us are yearning to bring more of this bygone mindset into the modern day. And the big takeaway here: No matter how many improvements we make to life, if the cost is our mental state, then perhaps it’s time to swing the pendulum back a bit.


This article originally appeared on 8.24.23

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Doctors warn you should never pop a pimple in the in the 'triangle of death' on your face

It could cause some severe health problems, including death.

via Anna Nekrashevich/Pexels

An area of the face known as the "triangle of death."

Parents always warn teenagers not to pop their acne because it will leave a scar, but that doesn’t always stop them from trying to eliminate painful blemishes that make them feel like the entire world is staring at them. However, recently, doctors have been warning people that popping zits in a specific area of the face can, in rare cases, lead to death.

Doctors say people should avoid popping pimples in an area of the face known as the “triangle of death.” The triangle covers the center of the face and extends from the bridge of your nose down to your upper lip.

The dangers of popping zits in the triangle became a big news item after many TikTok doctors shared a popular rumor that a Brazillian teen died from popping a pimple on her face.


@dermdoctor

RIP @realstories be careful in the triangle of death… this is possible but incredibly rare #dermatologist

Is it dangerous to pop pimples on my face?

Regardless if the story of the Brazilian teen is true, the takeaway from the story is important. One can get a serious infection and even die from popping a pimple inside the triangle of death. According to the Cleveland Clinic, this part of the face is a direct line to your brain.

“This area is unique because there are a lot of blood vessels there that are connected to the brain,” Dr. Kiyanna Williams tells Self. “If you were to get an infection [in the triangle of death] and it happened to spread, it could go down those blood vessels [in the cavernous sinus] connected to the brain and cause larger problems.”

These problems include a stroke, vision loss, or even death.

Infections that start with a popped pimple can lead to septic cavernous sinus thrombosis, a blood clot in the cavernous sinus that can create a brain abscess, damage to facial nerves, meningitis, pneumonia and septic emboli.

The Cleveland Clinic shared a TikTok video warning people about popping zits in the dreaded triangle of death.

@clevelandclinic

When it comes to your health, there’s one triangle you shouldn’t be obtuse about. The danger of popping a pimple on your nose or near your mouth. 👆👃🏼👄 #fyp #dangertriangle #pimplepop #skincare101 #health #skincare #themoreyouknow #healthtips

A big reason why people get infections after popping zits is because they don’t wash their hands. “If you pick your face with dirty fingers, dirty nails, or have dirty skin, you run the risk of causing a skin infection,” Dr. Joshua Zeichner, the director of cosmetic and clinical research at the Department of Dermatology at Mount Sinai in New York, told Huffington Post.

We must stress that although popping pimples in the triangle of death can lead to serious health problems, the chances are very slim. “Thankfully, it’s relatively unlikely,” Alok Vij, MD told Cleveland Clinic, “but whenever there’s a violation of the skin and interaction with bacteria, there’s always a possibility for infection, which can lead to greater health concerns.”

But if the fear of death doesn’t deter you from popping pimples on your face, you should stop to avoid creating a permanent scar. “Honestly, you should always avoid popping pimples,” Dr. Vij continued. “Doing so can lead to inflammation, post-inflammatory hyperpigmentation and scarring — and, of course, infection.”

What to do if I get a pimple?

Suppose you find yourself with a painful pimple and you don’t want a scar or to risk an agonizing death from a brain infection. In that case, the American Academy of Dermatology Association advises applying a warm, damp washcloth to the pimple for 10 to 15 minutes, 3 times daily. This will help it come to a head so it will eventually heal.

You can also treat the pimple with a topical medication containing the active ingredients adapalene, azelaic acid, benzoyl peroxide, or salicylic acid. A hydrocolloid acne patch can also protect your skin and support healing.

When using acne-fighting topical creams, it’s also important to stay out of the sunlight and to apply sunscreen because the medications can make your skin more sensitive to the sun.

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Culture

Guy starts singing a Sam Cooke song at the barbershop and blows everyone away

With 7 million views on TikTok alone, Shawn Louisiana's incredible viral video is a must-see.

Shawn Louisiana/YouTube

Sometimes a person opens their mouth to sing, and magic happens. It's hard to pinpoint exactly what qualities make a voice transcend the average and transfix an audience, but we know it when we hear it.

Enter Shawn Louisiana.

A video of him singing in a barbershop has gone viral and it's definitely worth a watch. He wrote on YouTube, "The older guy didn't think I could pull off a Sam Cooke song," but when he started singing "A Change is Gonna Come," he definitely proved that he could. Really well. Like, whoa.

Watch:

The older guy didn't think I could pull off a Sam Cooke song #achangegonnacomewww.youtube.com

There's a reason that video has gotten nearly 7 million views on TikTok alone.

Louisiana frequently shares videos of himself just singing casually for the camera, and I don't understand why this man's talent is not more well known yet.

I mean, just listen to this "Stand By Me" cover. Like butter. Sing me to sleep, sir.

Stand By Me - Ben E. King cover #tiktokwww.youtube.com

His Instagram account says he's available to book for weddings. That's nice, but someone please get this man a record deal so we can listen to him croon all day.

For more from Shawn Louisiana, follow him on TikTok, Instagram, and YouTube.


This article originally appeared on 9.1.21

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Pop Culture

Nervous flyer? Flight attendant reveals her top tips for calming down

Her viral TikTok video shares brilliant tips on how to calm yourself during airplane turbulence.

Photo credit: Canva

It can be hard not to panic when you're being rattled around thousand of feet in the air.

Next time you’re on a flight and experience turbulence, remember this solid advice from 23-year-old Rhia Kerr. She is, after all, a flight attendant.

Kerr, a flight attendant for Irish carrier group Ryanair (according to the New York Post) went viral on TikTok after sharing how you can calm yourself during turbulence.

The video shows Kerr seated mid-flight, as the words “Turbulence is a sudden shift in airflow and can be felt as jolts or vibrations inside the aircraft,” appear onscreen.


@rhizzlemynizzlee Mild turbulence, an everday occurrence! #fearofflying #turbulence ♬ Viva La Vida Coldplay sped up - Discord: olmac16


“When we experience turbulence, naturally our brains can’t comprehend being out of control and the sensation of falling can cause our brains’ fear response center to send a distress signal into our brain,” she continues.

Even though our brains don’t know how to handle the situation, Kerr attests that—despite what horror stories show up on the news about random plane malfunctions—aircrafts are “designed to withstand worse conditions” than turbulence.

Breathing Exercises for Flight Anxiety

But if trying to reason with your amygdala proves unsuccessful, Kerr suggests breathing exercises. The Calm app apparently has an entire section dedicated to this, as well as a couple of different methods listed on its website you can do before the light, or whenever mid-flight anxiety pops up. Check those out below:

Deep breathing

Deep breathing encourages full oxygen exchange, helping to slow down your heart rate and stabilize blood pressure, thereby reducing stress and anxiety.

How to practice:

  • Sit or lie down in a comfortable position.
  • Place one hand on your chest and another on your abdomen.
  • Inhale deeply through your nose, allowing your diaphragm to expand (your abdomen should rise higher than your chest).
  • Exhale slowly through your mouth.
Breath focus

Breath focus combines the benefits of deep breathing with mental concentration, creating a focal point that helps draw your attention away from the anxiety and onto something positive.

How to practice:

  • Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths.
  • As you breathe, focus on a particular word or image that brings you calm.
  • Visualize that word or image as you inhale and exhale.
The 4-7-8 breathing technique

The 4-7-8 technique forces your mind to focus on counting and your breath, diverting your thoughts from anxious triggers. The longer exhale acts as a natural sedative.

How to practice:

  • Close your mouth and inhale through your nose for 4 seconds.
  • Hold your breath for 7 seconds.
  • Exhale completely through your mouth for 8 seconds.
Alternate nostril breathing

This technique promotes balance and unity of both sides of the brain, contributing to calmness and mental clarity.

How to practice:

  • Sit in a comfortable position and close your eyes.
  • Close off your right nostril with your right thumb.
  • Inhale through your left nostril.
  • Close off your left nostril with your right ring finger and release your right nostril.
  • Exhale through your right nostril.
  • Repeat, alternating nostrils.
Enhanced Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR)

This method combines physical relaxation with deep breathing, helping to reduce muscular tension that might accompany anxiety.

How to practice:

  • Begin by tensing up a group of muscles as you breathe in, such as your toes or fists.
  • Hold for a count of 5.
  • Exhale and simultaneously release the tension in your chosen muscle group.
  • Work your way up (or down) your body, focusing on each muscle group on the way.

Kerr also advises listening to calming music (binaural beats can be great for this) fastening your seatbelt and closing your eyes.

And while trying to mitigate panic is important to avoid hyperventilating (“which will make you feel worse”) , she says that you should absolutely press the call bell to get help when needed. Don't suffer alone. And it’s probably wise to notify the staff before take-off that you might need some extra assistance.

Bottom line: Turbulence is normal. It doesn't mean that “the aircraft is going to fall out of the sky” and, perhaps most importantly, “the crew onboard are trained to handle it.”

“You are in very safe hands,” Kerr concludes.

So safe in fact, that it’s worth reminding yourself that as far as statistics are concerned, the safest travel possible is 30,000 feet in the air on a commercial airplane.

And if you need one more stress relieving tool up your sleeve, there’s a lot to be said about pretending you’re in jello.

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Springfield residents flood Haitian restaurant with support to 'conquer with love'

“We know Springfield is full of love. "[It] does not have the hate that is being told to the rest of the country…"

Photo credit: David Wilson (left) Lëa-Kim Châteauneuf (right)

Residents of Springfield, Ohio, can enjoy Haitian dishes like the traditional Haitian griot at Rose Goute Creole.

Whenever prejudice and hate rear their ugly heads, support and love find a way to snuff them out.

A rumor started by a Facebook post from a Springfield, Ohio, resident alleging that Haitian immigrants were killing and eating neighborhood pets quickly rose up through the misinformation chain, all the way to the U.S. presidential debates, causing a firestorm of ugly accusations and heinous hatred toward the Haitian population in the town. Despite assurances by the Springfield police department, city officials and mayor, as well as Ohio's governor, that the allegations are unfounded and false, the town has become a focal point for anti-immigrant bigotry.

False allegations about Haitians in Springfield eating pets created tension and threats

Those false allegations and bigotry have led to real-world consequences. Hate groups that were already targeting Haitians in Springfield were empowered by former president Donald Trump parroting their rhetoric. Public schools and municipal buildings in the city were closed for multiple days due to bomb threats. Two colleges in Springfield moved to virtual classes after bomb threats linked to the false claims. Haitian residents fear for their safety in the town they call home, with some even afraid to leave their houses.

However, amidst all of this chaos, some in Springfield are doing what they can to show their support for their Haitian neighbors.

People are showing up to show support for Haitians in Springfield in the wake of hateful bigotry

Hundreds of Springfield residents have flooded Rose Goute Creole Restaurant, a Haitian-owned eatery, in an effort to show the Haitian population there that hate has no place in their town.

“Springfield is diverse," city resident Steve McQueen, who helped arrange the act of "organized love," shared with Dayton 24/7 Now. “We know Springfield is full of love. [It] does not have the hate that is being told to the rest of the country and world as they’re even talking about.”

“We’re actually a beautiful city," added Springfield native Terrance Crowe. “I immediately shook my head and put my head down. You can’t conquer with hate, conquer with love.”

Rose Goute Creole opened in 2023, and manager Romane Pierre told the Springfield News-Sun what he's experienced in the wake of the falsehoods being spread about the Haitian community, which he said have come "as a shock."

“Yesterday some people call, I think they make some joke, ask if we have cat, dog," he said. "I say, ‘We don’t sell that. We sell chicken, fish, goat, pork, rice, beans.' I know my people — dogs, cats — we don’t do that in Haiti."

But Pierre has also been on the receiving end of support from other Springfield residents. "A lot of American people come here to try the food. They say ‘Don’t worry, we are with you,'" he told the News-Sun. "Everybody is welcome."

Why are there so many Haitians in Springfield, Ohio?

Thousands of Haitian migrants have moved to Springfield over the past several years after the city made a push in 2014 to welcome immigrants to fill a need for workers in the wake of population loss. The city had been labeled "the unhappiest city" in the U.S. by Gallup in 2011, with industries closing down, unemployment and crime rising, and people ultimately leaving. Since then, however, companies have been building plants, factories and warehouses, creating more jobs. The influx of immigrants filling those jobs has not been issue-free—adding that many people to a struggling town will naturally come with some challenges—but Pierre wants people to understand that Haitians came to Springfield to build a better life.

"I don’t want people to think that Haitians are bad people, because we came here to work," he said. "We work very hard."

Others have borne witness to the Haitian migrants' dedication to work. The United Farm Workers labor union has come to Haitians' defense on social media. And Springfield metal factory owner Jamie McGregor told PBS NewsHour that he has hired 30 Haitians and would love to hire 30 more.

"Our Haitian associates come to work every day," McGregor said. "They don't have a drug problem. They'll stay at their machine, they'll achieve their numbers. They are here to work."

Politicians keep pouring on the false claims about Haitians, with pushback from local and state officials

In addition to the false rumors of eating pets, other falsehoods being spread by politicians about Haitians in Springfield include that they are illegal immigrants (they have legal status), they have been spreading tuberculosis and HIV (the Ohio Department of Health reports that they haven't seen a discernible increase in communicable disease) and that they were "dropped" in Springfield with no warning (they've arrived over a period of years after the city joined a network of immigrant-friendly cities).

Ohio Governor Mike DeWine has called the rumors about the Haitians in Springfield "unfortunate."

"What we know is that the Haitians who are in Springfield are legal," he said an interview with ABC News' "This Week." "They came to Springfield to work. Ohio is on the move and Springfield has really made a great resurgence with a lot of companies coming in. These Haitians came in to work for these companies. What the companies tell us is that they are very good workers. They're very happy to have them there. And frankly, that's helped the economy now."

When hate comes to town, it's up to people of goodwill to make sure it doesn't find welcome. Even though there may be legitimate challenges that come with an influx of population, those are not insurmountable when a community comes together to solve them.

"“Why don’t we help them be better drivers or help them [learn to] speak English?” Springfield native Mark Houseman asked Dayton 24/7 Now. “We’re fighting a fight nobody will win. There’s no win at the end of this with that hate.”

“You’ve got to bridge the gaps, tear down those mental fences," added Crowe. "We’re all human; we’re all in one race, the human race.”

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