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Parkland students offer 7 great ideas about gun control — plus a ridiculous one.

In the lead-up to the March for Our Lives, The Guardian turned its pages over to the editors of Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School's student paper.

Eagle Eye staff wrote or edited more than a dozen stories on the British media outlet's U.S. website, complete with a number of great on-the-ground reports from the march itself. It was a really great idea, giving a large platform to some budding young journalists, and it was largely well-received.

Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School student Emma Gonzalez stands with other students during the Washington, D.C., March for Our Lives. Photo by Jim Watson/AFP/Getty Images.


One story did inspire a bit of controversy: "Our manifesto to fix America's gun laws" included a few clumsy goals mixed in with the good.

First, there's the good: Eagle Eye editors propose banning semi-automatic weapons that can fire high-velocity rounds, writing, "Civilians shouldn’t have access to the same weapons that soldiers do. That’s a gross misuse of the second amendment." Presumably, the students are referring to a renewed ban on so-called assault weapons, something that a recent Quinnipiac poll found was supported by around 67% of Americans.

They also call for a ban on bump stocks; the creation of a database for gun sales and elimination of background-check loopholes; a repeal of the Dickey Amendment, which prevents the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention from conducting any research that results in a recommendation for more gun restrictions; and for the government to raise the purchase age requirement to 21.

Then there's the not-so-good: "Dedicate more funds to mental health research and professionals," reads one of the recommendations, noting, "Many of those who commit mass shootings suffer from [PTSD, depression, and other debilitating mental illnesses]."

The trouble with that recommendation isn't in the actual policy itself — it's true that increased funding for mental health research and professionals would be helpful, generally — but in its justification.

As it turns out, individuals with mental illness are actually less likely than those without mental illness to carry out a gun-related homicide. Where mental illness does play a big role in gun deaths is suicide. So by all means, we should dedicate those funds to mental health programs, just not for the reasons these students are suggesting.

Millions of people around the country attended March for Our Lives rallies on March 24, 2018. Photo by Shannon Finney/Getty Images.

Another less-than-ideal agenda item is a call to increase funding for school security. Marjory Stoneman Douglas had one armed school resource officer on campus the day of the shooting. Can one officer protect 3,000 students? Probably not. Is the answer to fill halls with armed guards and officers? Also probably not.

Yes, a school resource officer did engage with the gunman in the recent school shooting in Maryland (which ultimately ended in the student's death by a self-inflicted gunshot). That officer's action is commendable, but there are unintended consequences of merging our schools with the police state: Time and again, school resource officers have been caught getting physically violent with students — especially students of color.

One idea in particular is worth another look: Allowing mental health providers to more freely speak with law enforcement about patients.

This may sound like a good idea, but it's actually a call to relax privacy laws and likely will just make the entire situation a whole lot worse. It is worth considering the students' context here, however:

"As seen in the tragedy at our school, poor communication between mental healthcare providers and law enforcement may have contributed to a disturbed person with murderous tendencies and intentions entering a school and gunning down 17 people in cold blood.

We must improve this channel of communication. To do so, privacy laws should be amended. That will allow us to prevent people who are a danger to themselves or to others from purchasing firearms. That could help prevent tragedies such as the Parkland massacre."

Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School staff members return to school on Feb. 23 after the shooting. Photo by Joe Raedle/Getty Images.

To be sure, most people who've been following the story coming out of Parkland will be able to agree that the shooter, Nikolas Cruz, fell through the law enforcement cracks. There were warning signs, but the real issue wasn't that law enforcement didn't know; it was that after school guidance counselor tried to have him involuntarily committed in 2016, a state agency determined that his "final level of risk is low."

Basically, everyone involved was human — but still in touch with each other. That's because the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act (HIPAA) already allows health providers to communicate with law enforcement if they believe there is a "serious and imminent threat of harm to self or others."

In fact, under HIPAA, providers have a duty to notify law enforcement in those situations. Further loosening those rules will only discourage people from seek help they need.

Also, law enforcement has an extremely sketchy history when it comes to responding to calls involving mental illness. A 2015 report found that nearly 1 in 4 fatal police encounters involved someone with mental illness, making mentally ill people an estimated 16 times more likely to be shot by police compared with the rest of the population — in part because not enough police officers are trained to deal with the mentally ill.

The general scope of the Parkland students' goals appear well-intentioned and actually within reach. Still, it's worth considering a few unintended consequences.

This is the starting point of a discussion, and the world is better because these students are speaking up for what they believe in. They may not get it totally right 100% of the time, and that's OK.

People attend the March for Our Lives in Washington, D.C. Photo by Mark Wilson/Getty Images.

Update 4/3/2018: This post was edited to clarify the detail that the Maryland school resource officer was later determined not to have taken down the armed student but that he had confronted him before the student took his own life.

When 6-year-old Blake Rajahn shows up to his first grade classroom on Monday, he will arrive bearing an uplifting a message for his fellow students.

Blake's mother, Nikki Rajahn, runs a custom personalization business in Fayette County, Georgia, and she asked her son what kind of t-shirt he wanted for his first day of school. He could have chosen anything—his favorite sports star's number, a cool dragon, a witty saying—anything he wanted, she could make.


Blake chose something unexpected—an orange t-shirt with a simple, sweet message for the other kids at his school to see. Five little words that might just mean the world to someone who reads them.

"I will be your friend."

Ouch. My heart.

Rajahn shared the story on her business Facebook page:

"I have to brag on my son. I told him that as a back to school gift, I will make him any shirt he would like. It could have anything—a basketball theme, football, etc. which are all his favorites. He thought a while and said, 'will you please make me a shirt that says "I will be your friend" for all the kids who need a friend to know that I am here for them?' Never underestimate your kid's heart for others! I love my sweet Blake! #stopbullying"







Apparently, such a gesture is typical of Blake. "He has always had a heart for others and is very genuine," his mother told Upworthy. She said she's donating part of the proceeds of her t-shirt sales to the Real Life Center, a non-profit that helps families in need in Tyrone, Georgia, all because of Blake.

"During the summer we had a vacation Bible school that he went to," she said, "and they did a toothbrush and toothpaste drive for the Real Life Center. He came home saying we needed to go to the Dollar Store to get some that night. We told him we would go the next day, but he had to use his money for it. He said that was fine, so we asked how much he would like to spend. He said, 'It's for people who don't have any, right?' We said yes, so he very matter-of-fact said, 'Well all of it!' And he did!"

Rajahn said everyone has been very encouraging and people are starting to order their own version of the t-shirt with "#blakesfriends" added to it.

She also shared Blake's reaction to hearing that his shirt idea was starting to spread on Facebook—and again, it's just the sweetest darn thing.

"Ever since I posted about my son and his shirt, I have sold some and told Blake about it. He said, "Oh good! Now more and more people are going to have more and more friends!" He is just so flattered so many want to be his twin too 😊"

Sometimes all a person needs is one friend so they won't feel alone, and Blake going out of his way to make sure kids feel welcomed by him is an example even adults can learn from. If we all reached out to people who might be shy or who might feel excluded, and let them know in some small way that we are open to being friends, what a better world we could build.

Thank you, Blake, for bringing some much-needed sunshine into our day.


This article originally appeared on 8.2.19

A couple arguing before bedtime.

Just about everyone who has been married has been told countless times by older, more experienced couples that one of the most essential rules is, “Don’t go to bed angry.” They swear it’s best for a relationship to hash out the disagreement before bed and ensure it’s resolved before anyone gets any shut-eye.

That advice makes a lot of sense. It’s hard to get to sleep after fighting with your significant other. The argument keeps playing over and over again in your head. You may be angry. You may be hurt. That’s a bad position to be in, if you need to get your 40 winks.

However, making a big problem solvable by the time we go to bed is like watching a big family problem get fixed in 23 minutes on a sitcom. It's just not realistic. Some issues deserve more thought and conversation.


Dr. Alexandra Solomon, a licensed clinical psychologist at The Family Institute at Northwestern University and a clinical assistant professor in the Department of Psychology at Northwestern University, recently made the case that it’s “loving” to go to bed angry in the caption of a myth-busting Instagram post.



Dr. Solomon is also the host of the “Reimagining Love Podcast,” where she challenges some of the questionable messages we’re given about love and relationships.

“I’ve been a couples therapist for over a quarter of a century and I’m here to remind you that it’s OK to go to bed mad,” she wrote in the caption of a viral Instagram post. She adds that it can be “loving” to go to bed angry under the following circumstances:

  • You’re exhausted.
  • You don’t have privacy.
  • You’ve been drinking or using drugs
  • It’s late and you’re talking in circles
  • One of both of you has a big day tomorrow
  • You have little kids who’ll be up at the ass crack of dawn needing pancakes
  • You’re at risk of saying or doing something that you’ll regret because you’re upset and exhausted

couple fight, go to bed angry, conflict resolutionA couple fighting before bed.via Sasint/Pixabay

However, she also shared 5 reasons when it’s not OK to go to bed angry:

  • Not every night, not even lots of nights.⁣
  • Not to prove a point.⁣
  • Not to get the upper hand.
  • Not to punish your partner
  • Not to show your partner what a jerk they are

Dr. Solomon says being tired makes us more likely to make extreme arguments and be more hostile than when we are well-rested. She believes that when couples go to bed angry, they should do so consciously with their partners by calling a “time out” on the argument and acknowledging the difficult situation.

“This is a really hard conversation,” or “I think we both feel pretty hurt and misunderstood,” you could say before tabling the discussion for the following day. You can also perform a loving gesture, such as getting your partner a glass of water or squeezing their foot before bed to let them know you are still safe.



Relationship myths such as “don’t go to bed angry” can become a real problem for couples who fail to live up to what’s seen as the relationship gold standard. When couples violate the relationship commandment and go to bed angry, they blame themselves when really, they’re not doing anything wrong. Conflict is natural. So is being tired.

That’s why Dr. Solomon’s myth-busting, Disney-did-us-wrong approach is so important.

"We grow up on this study stream of fairytales, song lyrics and romantic comedies that give us a view of love that is simplistic and unrealistic," says Dr. Solomon told Parade. "Then, when we bump into problems and challenges in our own lives, we end up feeling like we are the problem, rather than the myths being the problem."

cvouple fight, conflict resolution, relationshipsA couple fighting before bed.via RDNE Stock project/Pexels

Ultimately, relationships are complex, and myths such as “don’t go to bed angry” and the “happily ever after” story we’re told as children give us a false impression about what love and true partnership are all about. Then, when we fail to meet those expectations, we find fault in ourselves and our partners.

"Going to bed mad is painful enough on its own," Dr. Solomon says. "It feels lonely. It feels yucky. To add another layer of shame—[that] somehow this is wrong, I'm wrong, you're wrong, we're wrong—makes a hard thing harder."

Dr. Solomoan wants us all to realize that relationships are complex. So there’s nothing wrong with giving each other a break and sleeping on it for a night.


Julian Worsham gets a new cart.

Six-year-old Julian Worsham of Beaverton, Oregon is like a lot of other first-graders: he loves Super Mario and Taekwondo. But he has achondroplasia, the most common form of dwarfism, and goes to a school that wasn't built for kids his height.

"He's born into a world that just, in some ways, is not built for him," Julian's father, Brett, told WHAS11.

His mother did a walk-through before his first day at school to make sure he wouldn't run into any problems because of his height but forgot to check the cafeteria. [We] "noticed that where the food was, was right at his head," Heather told the Beaverton School District. Then, to make things more of a struggle, he had to carry his tray outside to the lunch benches.

The school made him a makeshift cart out of an upside-down milk crate on wheels to help him transport his lunch from the cafeteria to the benches.

"When I saw it I thought, 'Wow,'" said Enedelia Mottram, who's served lunch for the school district for 18 years. "I just wanted to help Julian, because I mean his head barely reaches the lunch line. He can't see anything."


Julian's first cart wasn't cutting the mustard.

via Beaverton School District

That night, she talked to her husband, James, a metalworker, to see if he could come up with something better. He got his team together at Wright Manufacturing in Portland to create a new cart that allowed Julian to transport his lunch tray and see over the counter.

James told the Beaverton School District that he wanted to make something that Julian would be "proud to push around."

James and his team put together a badass cart with adjustable, handlebar grips just like a motorcycle that has a stool inside so he can reach the countertop. It is adorned with flames and a personalized license plate that says, "JULIAN."

Julian's parents were blown away by the care and creativity that was put into creating his cart.

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"They took the time to get those license plates with his name, which is just like, they just really put a lot of heart into it. So when I saw it, the first thing I saw was actually a picture of James and his team who made the cart and I cried. It's just such a sweet thing," Heather said.

Julian loves the license plate and the flames and is now able to grab his lunch and get out to the benches in style.

"He's independent now," said Mottram. "Before, a staff member [would] have to be there to help him," she said.

Heather hopes that the story will inspire others to reach out and help other people in need.

"There's just wonderful people in this world that, you know, they have their eyes open. They're seeing needs that need to be met and they're meeting them. So I hope that other kids can get their needs met through this," she said.


This article originally appeared on 11.3.21

Photo by Mark Farías on Unsplash
man in black suit jacket kissing woman in white sleeveless dress

Loneliness is one of the most dangerous health problems in the United States, although it’s seldom discussed. Psychology Today says loneliness has the same mortality risks as obesity, smoking, alcoholism and physical inactivity.

A meta-analysis from Brigham Young University found that social isolation may increase the risk of premature death by up to 50%. The problem with loneliness is that people suffer in silence and it afflicts the ones we don’t see.

A TikTok user who goes by the name Megan Elizabeth recently shared a touching story on social media about how her grandfather was feeling lonely so he reached out to her.

The story shows what can happen when one person is brave enough to confront their social isolation and the important role grandkids can play in their grandparents’ lives.


It started when Megan's grandpa texted her to ask if she'd like to come over for a sleepover. “I haven’t been feeling well and miss you. We can order food and watch a mystery show. Love, grandpa,” he wrote.

Megan was happy to go see him, so grandpa made a series of requests to make the sleepover a hit.

“Could you pick up applesauce? The cinnamon kind,” he asked. “And if you go somewhere with mash potatoes, I would like that because I have no teeth and can only eat soft things. Ha!”

He also wanted some strawberry ice cream for dessert. “Thank you. You are my favorite granddaughter,” he ended the conversation. Megan later noted that she’s his only granddaughter.

Megan came by with a big bag of food and some ice cream and the two hung out and watched his favorite black-and-white “mystery movies.”

When it was time for bed, grandpa hadn't forgotten how to put her to sleep. He got her a glass of water to put by the bed in case she got thirsty and left a flashlight on the nightstand just in case his 29-year-old granddaughter got scared.

The next morning, at 5:30 am, he watched her leave for work.

Grandfather and granddaughter grew up close to one another.

Megan lived with her grandparents when she was young while her parents saved up money for a house. When they bought one, it was right across the street.

“I am so lucky to have grown up with my grandpa and my grandma (rest in peace),” she wrote on Instagram. “I feel so happy. I am thankful for my grandpa and he will never understand how much love he truly has shown me. And more importantly, the love he showed my grandma while she was alive. I believe in love and loyalty because of this man. He is my hero,” she added.

Megan's time with her grandfather made her realize a valuable lesson about her life.

"I think one of the most important realizations I have had recently is that it’s important to live in the moment but it is important to live in the now with intent," she wrote on Instagram, "so that when you are 92, you look back and smile at all the people you loved, the memories you made and the life you chose to live."


This article originally appeared on 04.27.22

Two northern cardinals captured on Carla Rhodes' bird-feeder camera.

The pandemic has caused many people to reevaluate their surroundings. When you’re stuck at home more often than you’d like, you start to pay a lot more attention to what goes on in your own backyard.

This type of introspection inspired wildlife photographer Carla Rhodes to get a closer look at the furry friends that live near her home in the Catskill mountains of New York.

What she found was magical.

“The winter of 2020-2021 was particularly brutal to humankind. After months of enduring the Covid-19 pandemic, we were now collectively slogging through winter. As a result of being stuck at home, I focused on my immediate surroundings like never before,” Rhodes said in a statement.


Rhodes positioned a DSLR camera trap beneath her bird feeder to get an up-close glimpse of the wildlife that came to sample her delicious seeds.

The results are an incredible series of photos of birds and other woodland creatures from a vantage point most people never see. Rhodes calls her project, "Beneath the Bird Feeder."

The birdfeeder photos also gave a new glimpse into the behavior of several species of birds and rodents that call the Catskills home.

“As I got deeper into the project, intriguing observations emerged,” Rhodes says. “I noticed distinct repeat visitors such as a Dark-Eyed Junco with an overgrown beak, a deer mouse with a notched ear, and an irruption of Red-Breasted Nuthatches. Dark-Eyed Juncos always showed up at the crack of dawn and Northern Cardinals would always be the last visitor of the day as dusk turned into evening.”

Here are 15 of the most captivating photos that Rhodes captured from beneath her bird feeder.

1. Dark-eyed junco

via Carla Rhodes

"Often overlooked and considered drab ground-feeding birds, Dark-Eyed Juncos hold a special place in my heart due to their funny and curious behaviors. Every day they were first to arrive beneath the bird feeder," Rhodes says. "Dark-Eyed Juncos were one of the most frequent and curious subjects beneath the bird feeder."

2. Dark-eyed junco

via Carla Rhodes

3. Dark-eyed junco

via Carla Rhodes

4. Tufted titmouse

via Carla Rhodes

According to All About Birds, the tufted titmouse is "common in eastern deciduous forests and a frequent visitor to feeders."

5. Mourning dove

via Carla Rhodes

​"Observing Mourning Doves was a daily pleasure, especially when they gathered to form a clean-up crew beneath the bird feeder. Mourning doves are monogamous and possibly mate for life," Rhodes writes.

6. Mourning dove 

via Carla Rhodes

7.  Mourning doves

via Carla Rhodes

8. Blue jay

via Carla Rhodes

"Blue Jays are known for their intelligence and complex social systems with tight family bonds," All About Birds says. "Their fondness for acorns is credited with helping spread oak trees after the last glacial period."

9. Northern cardinal

via Carla Rhodes

"Northern Cardinals were always the last to show up beneath the bird feeder, shortly after dusk every evening," Rhodes writes.

10. Black-capped chickadee

via Carla Rhodes

"Little flocks of Black-capped Chickadees enliven the winter woods with their active behavior and their cheery-sounding chick-a-dee callnotes as they fly from tree to tree, often accompanied by an assortment of nuthatches, creepers, kinglets, and other birds," the Audubon field guide to North American birds says.

11. Black-capped chickadee

via Carla Rhodes

12. Eastern gray squirrel

via Carla Rhodes

Eastern gray squirrels are important members of forest ecosystems as they play a vital role in dispersing seeds.

 13. American red squirrel

via Carla Rhodes

The American red squirrel is known for its distinct bushy and dark red tail with hints of a white outline.

14. American red squirrel

via Carla Rhodes

15. Northern short-tailed shrew

via Carla Rhodes

If you see a northern short-tailed shrew, be careful. It's venomous and paralyzes its victims with poisonous saliva. In humans, a bite can cause swelling and intense pain.


This article originally appeared on 01.03.22