Millennials nearing 40 are sharing their biggest mistakes so everyone can learn from them
Here are 21 of the most powerful responses.
Millennials are now old enough to seriously reflect on life.
It seems like only yesterday a millennial was a college kid that baby boomers chided for being entitled and Gen Xers thought were way too sincere and needed to learn how to take a joke. Today, the oldest millennials, those born around 1980, have hit their 40s and have lived long enough to have some serious regrets.
They also have enough experience to take some pride in decisions that, in hindsight, were the right moves. The good news is that at 40 there is still plenty of time to learn from our successes and failures to set ourselves up for a great second half of life. These lessons are also valuable to the Gen Zers coming up who can avoid the pitfalls of the older generation.
A Reddit user who has since deleted their profile asked millennials nearing 40 “what were your biggest mistakes at this point in life?” and they received more than 2,200 responses. The biggest regrets these millennials have are being flippant about their health and not saving enough money when they were younger.
They also realized that the carefree days of youth are fleeting and impossible to get back. So they should have spent less time working and more time enjoying themselves. Many also lamented that they should have taken their education more seriously in their 20s so they have more opportunities now.
The responses to this thread are bittersweet. It's tough hearing people come to grips with their regrets but the realizations are also opportunities to grow. Hopefully, some younger people will read this thread and take the advice to heart.
Here are 21 of the most powerful responses to the question: “Millennials of Reddit now nearing your 40s, what were your biggest mistakes at this point in life?”
1.
"Not taking care of my hearing, not even 35 and going deaf." — Kusanagi8811
2.
"Not getting healthy earlier." — zombiearchivist
3.
"Staying too long at a job in my 20s, just because it was safe and easy. When I finally got the motivation to leave, ended up with an almost 50% pay boost." — Hrekires
4.
"Thinking that I could and should put myself on the back burner for anything and anyone else." — lenalilly227
5.
"Smoking and not dealing with my shit the right way." — Allenrw3
6.
"Pining after the wrong person." — runikepisteme
7.
"I turned 40 this year and just started liking who I am. Why the fuck did it take 40 years for self acceptance?" — guscallee
8.
"Take care of your fucking back. Lift with your knees. Sure it's rad when you grab a fridge by yourself and lift it in the back of a moving truck unaided, but one day that shit is going to have consequences that won't just magically go away by resting and "taking it easy" for a week." — GuyTallman
9.
"I wish I spent more time with my dad while I had the chance." — CharlieChooper
10.
"I'm 37. I absolutely could have taken better care of my body, but I'm in relatively good health. I'm starting to realize how important it is to maintain my health. I do also think I drank far too much in my 20 and early 30's. I'm trying to rectify that now, but it's hard. So that I guess." — dartastic
11.
"I'm not sure if people have experienced the same but when I entered my 30s I became convinced I was rapidly running out of time. Rather than using that as motivation I let it paralyze me with indecision because I "couldn't afford to make the wrong choice." Consequently, I'm now 39 and, though I've had great things happen in my 30s, I regret spending so much time worrying and so little time committing to a course of action." — tomwaste
12.
"Work to live, don’t live to work. You have half your working life after you turn 40 but only 20-25 years to really live it up before the responsibilities become heavy and your joints start to ache. Live life. Really LIVE it. Experience as much you can. Every sensation, sight, sound, touch. Be open. Be brave. Live your first few decades in the fast lane. You have the rest of your life to take it easy, when you have no choice." — MrDundee666
13.
"I should have paid more attention to my parents telling me to save money and less attention when they were teaching me about purity culture." — Arkie_MTB
14.
"If I could tell my 18 year old self one thing, it would be to save 10% of every paycheck I ever got." — PutAForkInHim
15.
"Thinking that I have time to do everything I want only to find myself loosing time, and the endless energy I used to have in order to purse them." — ezZiioFTW
16.
"Not wearing sunscreen." — blueboxreddress
17.
"Not recognizing the importance of work/life balance earlier in life. My late teens, all 20's, and early 30's were spent pulling 60-100+hr weeks because I thought it was what was required to succeed. How wrong I was. Others stabbed me in the back and reaped the reward.
1.) Putting work first for too long. Work is my #1 priority during work hours now. After quitting time, I don't think about it (much) anymore. I don't vent to my wife or friends about it anymore either.
2.) Investing more into fast cars than solid long-term investments. Sure, it was fun, but I could have made bookoos more had I put that towards less-fun investments.
3.) Not using PTO and just waiting for the payout. All those years, missed. I'm in my mid 30's and I didn't actually have a real vacation until 3 years ago.
4.) Not realizing that "the good guy" often loses. Just because you're morally justified doesn't mean you're going to win. Just because there's a number to call doesn't mean anyone will actually help you. Just because "law" exists, doesn't mean people follow it, enforce it, or create justice. The world is dog eat dog and cynicism can be healthy in moderate doses." — [Deleted]
18.
"When you get out of college, keep your friends. No matter how hard it is. Hold on to them." — mpssss22
19.
"I imagine these are kinda universal:
- Not getting fit and healthy
- Assuming I'd be offered proper guidance on how to achieve my goals
- Assuming higher education would help me achieve my goals
- Spending far too long caring what people think
- Not taking risks that might better my life when I was younger and had nothing to lose
- Staying in relationships too long after they were clearly done." — katapultperson
20.
"Always ask for more pay. Starting, yearly, before leaving, whatever. Get that money." — SensibleReply
21.
"Spending too much time in front of a screen and not enough enjoying life." — BellaPadella
This article originally appeared two years ago.
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Millennial mom struggles to organize her son's room.Image via Canva/fotostorm
Boomer grandparents have a video call with grandkids.Image via Canva/Tima Miroshnichenko
Information from the NICABM website regarding the "Window of Tolerance."Photo Credit: The National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine 
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Gen Xers and Millennials share 17 of the strangest things their Baby Boomer parents do
"My mom writes her emails in MS Word, then attaches the Word document to the email."
A Baby Boomer couple.
Generational fights have raged since the dawn of time, and a recent spat between Millennials and Baby Boomers is no exception. Baby Boomers, who raised Millennials, accuse the younger generation of being entitled and irresponsible with money. At the same time, Millennials accuse Boomers of having it easier economically while making it harder for those who came after them.
Where is Gen X in the battle? Probably off in the corner somewhere, saying, "Whatever." Aside from the generational sniping, there are some things the older generation does that are just plain baffling to younger people. Whether it's outdated worldviews, a refusal to adapt to modern technology, or a lack of self-awareness, Baby Boomers can do some strange things.
To help the younger folks get over their frustrations with parents from the "Me Generation," a Redditor asked: "What is the most Boomer thing your parents still do?" The stories were pretty funny and relatable, showing that almost everyone with parents over 60 is dealing with the same thing.
Here are 17 of the "strangest" things people's Baby Boomer parents do:
1. Phones on full blast
"Play iPhone slot machine games at full volume in the doctor’s office."
"My dad pretty much exclusively has his phone on speaker, and just walks around in public talking with it at max volume (and talking really loud himself). I’m like 'Dad, the entire supermarket doesn’t want to listen to you, and Uncle Jim complains about how often you have to pee.'"
2. Still using checkbooks
"My mom balances her checkbook every week. They still have a landline."
"And she probably has way more money than you will until she dies!"
3. Email issues
"My mom writes her emails in MS Word, then attaches the Word document to the email."
"Like the email is just the virtual envelope for the digital letter."
4. Restaurant jokes
"All those little restaurant comments.
'Wow, they'll let anyone in here!' when seeing a friend at said restaurant.
'Thanks for having us, not everyone will' to the waiter at the end of the meal.
'As you can see, it was terrible' when the staff takes away the clearly entirely eaten plate.
'You're going to have me floating away in a minute' when more water is put into their glass"
5. Always have to mention race
"Constantly mentioning the race or ethnicity of everyone she mentions. Never with any negative connotation or comment, but usually, there is no reason for it to be relevant to the conversation."
"My Jewish mother will always whisper the word 'black' in case anyone hears her: 'So the nice black man at the hardware store helped me find the right garden hose.'"
6. Googling their Google
"Typing Google on Google before they Google the thing they’re looking for."
"In the Google search bar, they type Google? Lol."
7. Getting a job is a cinch
"Believing you can walk into a business and hand in a resume. If you have a college degree in any field, they'll hire you."
"Just physically hand over your resume to HR or the hiring manager. You'll make a mark and get hired!! Call the office and ask to speak to HR/Hiring Manager."
Any Millennial who argued with their Boomer parents about how hard it is to land a good job should feel vindicated by a 2022 study, which found that most older Millennials didn't secure good jobs until their early 30s, while most Boomers did so in their 20s. "To secure a good job, young adults need to acquire more education and high-quality work experience than was necessary for previous generations," the researchers wrote.
8. Why are they together?
"Stay married forever while they behave like neither one of them can stand each other."
"I'm on the other side of that. After my mom passed, my dad now acts like their marriage was picture perfect and they were the love of each other's lives, even though they couldn't stand each other for at the very least 40 of the 54 years they were married."
9. Collectables or hoarding?
"Think their 'collectibles' are truly valuable."
"My mom insists her Hummels are going to put my kids through college!"
"Mine are the Thomas Kincade paintings. She has a Victorian glass piece that might actually be worth something, but those damn paintings are the real investment."
10. Can you grab the mail?
"Ask me to bring in the mail when they go away for more than 24 hours."
"My parents think everybody is standing at the door waiting for the mailman every day, and don’t believe me when I tell them that some people go days without checking their mail. They think everybody is waiting for the mailman every day because 'somebody might send them a check.' Like, really?"
11. Zero responsibility
"'Well, I guess I was just a bad father.' Yeah. That attitude of anti-responsibility is exactly why 3 out of 4 of your children don't talk to you."
"Ha! Have the same dad, do we?"
12. Comment on people's appearance
"Comment on EVERYBODY’s body/appearance/weight. The first thing my dad does after not seeing me for a year is poke me in the gut and tell me how fat I am."
13. Boomer panic is real
"Literally throwing their hands up in a panic when they don't understand something. Where did they learn that?"
"Or just saying 'well, I don't know', especially when that comes right after you explaining it and showing them how to do something, with them nodding along and asking relevant questions all the way through."
In a video by YourTango, editor Brian Sundholm tried to explain Boomer panic in an empathetic way: "Most of us nowadays know the importance of recognizing and feeling our emotions." Sundholm then quoted therapist Mitzi Bachman, who explained that when people struggle to express their emotions, it can result in an "unhinged" reaction.
14. Annoying Facebook posts
"Post nonsensical rants on Facebook for other boomers to like, share, and comment. Often these rants are political, but not always. Basically cringe-fest."
"Most people won't do it, but share this post if you believe in god and freedom."
"I do NOT give Facebook permission to use my photos and personal information!"
15. Dinner pushers
"While we're eating breakfast. What do you want to do for supper?"
"Can't we enjoy this meal without worrying about the next?"
16. They print everything
"My boomer in-laws print EVERYTHING! The number of times I have said, 'quit wasting ink, email it to me, or text me the link. Or just text me the schedule, don't print it out.' GPS on their phones? Nope...print a map."
"Boomers and their paper man. My dad has finally started using the internet, but he still prints everything he likes. Like he'll see a boat listing on Craigslist and print the entire page, including a massive color photo of it, and he's definitely not going to be buying it either. He's got a stack of papers that is the internet that sits by his recliner. He just sits there with Fox News on (though it's usually muted for some reason, that's a plus) and looks at his papers."
17. Flirting with servers
"My dad is 77 still flirts with the young waitresses. It's f**king weird for everyone."
"He thinks he is in cute old man territory, but he is not."