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An unexpected, outrageous casualty of Trump's travel ban, and 6 ways to fight it.

When you're a refugee in a new place, you're facing a lot of unfamiliar things. New foods. New languages. New schools. New neighbors.

That's where organizations like World Relief come in. Among other services, the Baltimore-based nonprofit helps resettle refugees, partnering with local churches across the U.S. to help refugee families feel more at home in their new communities. With President Trump's travel ban targeting Muslims, however, the nonprofit's facing a new, discouraging obstacle.


Photo by Ron Sachs - Pool/Getty Images.

World Relief announced it's closing five offices across the country — laying off over 140 of its workers in the process — due to President Trump's travel ban barring refugees.

"Our staff at each of these locations have served diligently and sacrificially — some of them for many years — and we are deeply saddened to have to make this difficult decision," World Relief President Scott Arbeiter said in a statement, noting the tragic move will hinder the group's ability "to serve the world's most vulnerable people."

Even in the relatively short amount of time that the travel ban was signed and enforced before courts blocked key provisions, its ramifications are still causing refugees — and the groups aiding them — to suffer. What's more, the travel ban — announced by a president elected largely for his commitment to put American workers first — is now causing job losses: World Relief's woes will result in over 140 employees losing their jobs.

Despite its struggles, however, the nonprofit is devoted to doing whatever it can to make a difference.

“The unfortunate truth is that given the unprecedented nature of the global refugee crisis, there are simply more people than ever that need our support and our compassion," CEO Tim Breene said in a statement.

If the news out of World Relief is frustrating to you, here are six ways you can keep fighting for refugees in the wake of the group's setbacks:

1. Keep calling Washington. It works.

The Senate has been overwhelmed with phone calls from constituents across the country. Sen. Chuck Schumer's office told CNN that roughly 1.5 million calls were pouring into the Senate every day the first week of February, with the vast majority focused on Trump's controversial cabinet picks and executive orders.

John McCain probably won't personally call you back. But you should still call. Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images.

Outraged callers won't guarantee success all the time (take Education Secretary Betsy DeVos' razor-thin confirmation, for instance). But it works better than most voters realize (case in point: Congress' attempt to gut the Office of Congressional Ethics). Call your senators and members of Congress and tell them you're against Trump's travel ban.

2. Pledge to register as a Muslim if Trump attempts to start a Muslim registry.

Trump has suggested a national Muslim registry would help keep us safer from terrorism, yet again dangerously blurring the lines between religious extremists and the vast majority of Muslims. This sort of fearmongering is used to justify his travel ban. Regardless of your personal faith, you can stand with all Muslims by pledging to register yourself.

3. Support the vital organizations aiding refugees in the U.S. and around the world.

Conflict in Syria has caused a refugee crisis unlike anything we've seen since World War II, with millions of families torn away from their communities and forced to rely on the goodness of others for food, shelter, and protection.

Photo by Bulent Kilic/AFP/Getty Images.

There are many groups of all sizes doing vital work helping refugees this very moment, and they could use our support: Doctors Without Borders, UNICEF, White Helmets, Karam House, Syrian American Medical Society, Islamic Relief USA, UNHCR, Oxfam, Save the Children, and, yes, World Relief.

4. Post the news about World Relief on Facebook along with this video explaining why refugees are not the problem.

Over 700k refugees have resettled in the United States since 9/11. During that time, not a single one has carried out an act of terror. Video by Valerie Bischoff.

Posted by Upworthy on Thursday, October 13, 2016

Your friends and family should see how anti-refugee rhetoric and policies affect far more people than refugees themselves — like the 140 World Relief employees who lost their jobs due to unfounded fear.

5. Sign a petition against the ban, then spread the word.

A MoveOn.org petition against Trump's travel ban — which states "targeting people based on their religion is wrong and unconstitutional" — has reached nearly 400,000 signatures. Help it reach 1 million.

6. Support the refugees in your own community, who — now more than ever — need to know they're welcome here.

As TED Ideas notes, there are plenty of practical ways you can help folks integrate into your city, especially if you live in a region with a high population of refugees. Start a soccer team — even if you can barely kick a ball — and make sure to include refugee kids. Volunteer to help a refugee student learn English. If you're a business owner, hire them (or if you know a business owner, nudge them in the direction to do so).

1951 Coffee Company in Berkeley, California, hires refugees to help give them a leg-up after resettling in the U.S. Photo by Josh Edelson/AFP/Getty Images.

Trump's travel ban targeting Muslims is immoral, ineffective in keeping us safe, and bad for U.S. workers.

In the U.S., there have been more than enough terrorist attacks since 9/11 carried out by right-wing extremists — and none from refugees. The vetting process to enter the U.S. as a refugee is long and arduous and certainly not one that leaves us vulnerable to terrorism, experts have argued.

Don't let the ban — and the misguided views of Islam that's helped buoy it — become normalized. Stay outraged.

Photo by Katie Emslie on Unsplash

There are times in parenting where you just feel kind of useless.

You can't carry the baby, take a late-night breastfeeding shift, or absorb any of the pain and discomfort of childbirth.

Sometimes the best you can do is to try to take care of your partner.

That's what brought user u/DietyBeta to the AskParents subreddit with a well-meaning question.


"My wife watches our 1yo, works, and is 12 week pregnant. How can I make her daily life easier while I'm away at work?"

He says that when he gets home from work, he takes over all parenting and homemaking duties.

But yeesh! That's still... a lot to handle. No wonder his wife is stressed out.

A few folks chimed in to pat the OP on the back. After all, it's great to see a dad who realizes how much is falling on mom's shoulders and actively looking for ways to lighten the load!

Some helpful suggestions rolled in, like taking over meal prep and making her easy lunches to heat up, hiring cleaners, or paying someone to walk the dogs.

woman in black shirt lying on couch Photo by Alexander Grey on Unsplash


But then even more people came in to the comments asking the same question over and over: If mom is working, why isn't the 1-year-old in daycare?

u/young-mommy wrote: "Is the one year old in daycare? If not, I would start there. Working from home with a child gets harder and harder as they enter toddlerhood"

u/min2themax said: "It’s nice of you to be asking how to help her but she really is getting the fuzzy end of the lollipop here. It sounds like she is literally always working or parenting. Sometimes both at the same time. Walking the dogs and making her lunches and prepping meals and doing laundry is all well and good but this is not at all sustainable."

u/alternative-box3260 said: "Have the one year old in daycare. I was in a similar situation and it’s impossible. I was able to breath after that, not before."

And u/sillychihuahua26 wrote: "She’s caring for your 1.year old while working? That’s a horrible plan. You guys need childcare like yesterday."

We have a legitimate childcare crisis in our country, and stories like this one really bring it to life.

Childcare in the United States isn't nearly accessible or affordable enough for most families. Period.

ChildCare Aware found that that average cost of childcare in 2022 was $10,853 per year, or roughly 10% of a median family income (in 2024, it's likely even more than that — yet the actual workers at childcare centers are somehow severely underpaid).

But even that eye-popping number is conservative. Anyone who lives anywhere close to a city (or in California or New York) knows the number will be way higher. It's just not feasible for most families to put their child, let alone multiple children, in full-time care while they're young.

And yet! The percentage of households with two parents working full-time has been rising for decades. Life is more expensive than ever, and the extra income from two working parents really helps, even if it's offset by those child care costs.

More and more families are trying to scrape by — by trying to do it all

woman in white shirt sitting on brown wooden armchair Photo by Keren Fedida on Unsplash

Now we don't know whether the OP's family can afford childcare for their 1-year-old or not, although in a later update to the post he wrote:

"As far as daycare, she doesn't want to because she feels like she would be missing out on the time"

So even if you can afford childcare, there's the still the crushing guilt of shipping your child off to be raised by strangers to deal with! Classic.

(Take one guess who shoulders most of the daycare guilt — dads or moms?)

The work-from-home revolution has been a Godsend for parents in certain ways — flexibility, balance, less commuting time — but its also saddled many of them with double duty.

'Hey how about you work full-time because we need the money AND keep an eye on the kids, since you're home anyway!'

But it doesn't work like that, and trying to do both is crushing modern parents.

In fact, the Surgeon General of the United States just put out an official advisory based on the plummeting mental state of today's parents.

We know parents are having a hard time and that it's getting picked up in the national conversation. But hearing about a mom working full-time with a 1-year-old on her hip while pregnant, and a dad stuck working out of the house who's at a total loss for how to make things better really paints a pretty bleak picture.

No one should have to work full-time and parent full-time, at the same time.

A fridge full of microwavable lunches and a fleet of dog walkers isn't going to make it any better until things start changing from the very top.

Photo by Raul Angel on Unsplash
woman carrying smiling baby

Anyone who's had a baby knows how the sound of crying can feel like torture. Literally.

If you're lucky, you get a baby who rarely cries, but some babies spend weeks or months being screechy, colicky little fussbuckets whose unbearable cuteness is the only thing that keeps you from throwing them out the window. (If you haven't had one of those babies, that may sound horrifying, but if you know, you know.)

Sometimes babies cry because they're hungry, which is a problem easily fixed. Sometimes babies cry because their diaper is soiled—also an easy fix. Sometimes babies cry because they are clearly overtired—easy to fix on paper, but not always so simple in practice. Still, you at least know what's bugging them.

But sometimes babies cry and you can't figure out why. It might be gas, but they can't say, "My tummy hurts." Maybe they want to be held or cuddled, but not like that. Nope, not like that. Not like that, either. Perhaps they see all these big humans doing things they can't do and they're just mad about being a helpless baby. Who knows?

With fussy babies, the traditional "feed them, change them, rock them" advice often doesn't make a dent. The crying can make you feel like you're losing your mind, so if someone figures out a trick to get them to stop—even for a while—it feels like a godsend.


That's one reason this video of a dad demonstrating how he gets his baby to stop crying in 18 seconds flat has gone viral.

In a TikTok video, Jonathan, aka "Tuque Daddy," shows how he holds his 2-month-old son with one hand and wraps his little arms across his body in a "self hug" with the other. Then he holds one hand over the baby's arms and torso and the other cradling him under the diaper. A little gentle bobbing in this position and voila! Baby stops crying in 18 seconds.

Watch the magic happen (and just ignore the rogue "8" that gets stuck on the screen):

@tuquedaddy

Reply to @king.marcellius I wanna see people try!! Duet this and try if you can!! I wanna see y’all super heroes 🥰🥰🥰 #tuquedaddy #fypシ #parenting

See how even just a few seconds of that crying sends an electric jolt down your spine? It was enough for some commenters to say "Maybe I need to rethink wanting a baby." (My 13-year-old son came into the room while I was watching the video and said, "That's so annoying. How did you have babies?" Yep, that was you, dude. You're welcome. After the second viewing, he actually said, "Wow. Sorry.")

But then the unbearable cuteness comes in, doesn't it? Gracious, that little one's face at the end. It's amazing how quickly babies can take us from "Arrrrgh" to "Awwww."

And this daddy's gentle patience and reassurance is a beautiful cherry on top. "You alright, my boy?" So dang sweet.

Speaking of sweetness (and unbearable cuteness), check out Tuque Daddy's convo with his boy in another video:

@tuquedaddy

Paid actor 🤣 #tuquedaddy #fypシ #daddio #funny #baby #boy #dadsoftiktok @housecoatmommy

And as for the way he calmed the baby down? That's a legitimate technique that a "magician pediatrician" in Santa Monica, California shows the parents of his patients. Dr. Robert Hamilton has been treating babies and kids for more than three decades. His video describing "the hold" has been viewed more than 53 million times on YouTube and he has been featured in videos all around the world for his ability to almost instantly calm babies down.

If you have a baby in your life, give "the hold" a try the next time they're crying and see if the magic happens for you.

This article originally appeared on 2.16.22

It's kitten season!

Who can resist a sweet little kitten trying to cross the road? Even if you’re not a fan of cats, you’d likely stop for a baby animal in the street. That’s what happened to Robert Brantley of Louisiana. Brantley was on his way to work and spotted a tiny white and gray kitten trying to get across the street. Being a kind human, he stopped his car to bring the kitten to safety. But he got more than he bargained for, because as he was scooping up the little thing, several more kitty cat siblings came running out of the nearby grass.


In all, Brantley counted 13 kittens. Twelve more than he planned on caring for, but by the looks of his Instagram page, his family has taken their role of cat rescuers seriously. With kitten season being in full effect in these warmer months and pet surrenders remaining high since the return to work from the pandemic, Brantley taking on fostering 13 kittens is much needed. Humane societies across the country are reportedly full or even over capacity. My own local humane society currently has nearly 150 animals over its limit and is begging for foster families and adopters to help clear the shelter.

It’s not only humane societies that have reached or exceeded capacity. Animal rescues across the board are in dire need of people to take animals to make room for the inevitable drop off of puppies and kittens from the current litter season. Mating season, which subsequently turns into puppy and kitten season, starts in early spring and lasts throughout the summer. This inundates local shelters and rescues.

Some shelters, like my local humane society, are asking people who find litters of puppies or kittens to do exactly what Brantley is doing.

Foster them and attempt to adopt them out on their own. It looks like Brantley's wife decided to get these now cleaned up kitties in their Sunday best to have a photoshoot in her makeshift studio. One kitten sported a bow tie while the others climbed around the enclosure patiently awaiting their turn. It also seems Brantley himself is having fun with the situation—in one video he talks about what he packs to go on a marksmanship match and includes 13 kittens along with his tripod and toolkit.

In one of Brantley’s most recent updates, he says that two of the kittens, Michael Scott and Nala, have been adopted by a family in Alexandria, Louisiana. In the same update he informs his followers that one of the kittens still left to be adopted is currently on daily medication and the family is keeping up with check-ups for the rest of the furry crew.

Here’s hoping that all of these little guys get adopted out soon. And may more people take Brantley’s lead to foster the kittens or puppies they find if they have the means. This can also serve as a reminder to spay and neuter your pets and any strays you may be caring for outside of your home.


This article originally appeared on 6.16.22

Royalty-Free photo: Woman holding mop | PickPik

Sometimes the internet is like a great big community. One that supports its members who are in need of help.

Aaliyah (@oc.liyahh) revealed her struggles of working full-time, without a home of her own, in a heartfelt TikTok video. Little did she know that sharing her story would lead to not only sincere support from total strangers online, but some actual solutions for her problem.

As a full-time employee at Home Depot, Aaliyah worked eight-hour shifts, five days a week. But once she clocked out, it didn’t get much easier.

Having only her car for shelter, Aaliyah would have to use facilities like Planet Fitness to take a shower, only occasionally being able to afford a night in a hotel. With those kinds of challenges, it’s perfectly understandable she admitted to always being tired and “barely ever smiling.”

@oc.liyahh #fypシ #viraltiktok ♬ Sure Thing (cover version) - Tik Toker

Aaliyah’s clip soon went viral with more than 5 million views, and though there were some accusations of Aaliyah “faking it,” the overall response was incredibly supportive. Some even came out to share similar experiences.

“I used to sleep in my car and take showers at the gym also and worked two jobs and barely slept,” one person wrote, encouraging her with, “now I own a small business, my house and two vehicles.”

Another added, “keep at it. I was homeless…I would shower at friends’ houses and ride a bike to work. Now I got my own place and car.”

It does help to hear how others have overcome obstacles you’re currently facing, but Aaliyah received even more reason to remain hopeful.

Unbeknown to her, Aaliyah’s very workplace could provide assistance. Many TikTok users informed her of the Homer Fund, a grant program that provides financial assistance to employees facing hardship. According to the company website, more than 150,000 associates have already been helped.

In a series of follow up videos, we find out that Aaliyah did reach out to the Homer Fund, and received not only emergency funding to get a hotel, but permanent housing as well.

This young woman went from “barely being able to smile” to dancing and feeling “beyond grateful.”


This article originally appeared on 2.3.22

Photo by Karlo Tottoc on Unsplash

Imagine this.

You grow up loving animals – you're the rare type of human who loves cats and dogs equally. You're also fond of birds, lizards — pretty much anything that was worth of securing a spot on the Ark.

So you decide to become a veterinarian when you grow up so you can help as many of them as possible.

As a vet, you do get to help a lot of animals! But here are some other things you deal with on a daily basis.


Abandoned, mistreated, and abused pets. You know that horrible Sarah McLaughlin commercial with all the sad animals that haunts all of our dreams? Imagine waking up and clocking into work and seeing that, or worse, every single day.

long-coated black and white dog during daytimeMuch needed photo of a cute dog. Photo by Baptist Standaert on Unsplash

Owners that can't or won't get proper care for their pets. Pet care, including essential medications and surgeries, is really expensive. Someone might adopt a puppy because they have the means to feed it and get it vaccines, but that doesn't mean they have $10,000 to shell out for hip surgery a few years later, and as a vet you may have to watch that animal go without.

(Though that's probably preferable to when owners come in wanting to euthanize perfectly healthy pets due to inconvenience.)

And then there's the fact that most veterinarians must perform euthanasia on a daily basis — a heartbreaking reality of the job.

All of that while often saddled with medical debt and making less than stellar wages.

As tough as these things are, many vets report that they're somehow the least stressful parts of their day-to-day.

The worst thing that vets actually deal with, though, is all the humans.

It's unfortunately very common for pet owners to get angry about the cost of care and take it out on veterinarians and their staff, hurling abuse and accusations of greed at them.

Cyber-bullying is a big problem, too, with angry customers leaving bad reviews and social media posts that vets aren't allowed to respond to due to privacy concerns.

From there, it's not unheard of for angry clients to make threats or even resort to violence against veterinarians.

The reality of the career is a far cry from just playing with puppies all day — it's frequently dealing with difficult, entitled, or emotional owners.

It should be no surprise, then, that veterinarians are facing a mental health crisis — but somehow it still is.

short-coated brown puppy on white floorThis dog would never scream at a vet and make them cry Photo by Jairo Alzate on Unsplash

When I learned that this is one of the industries with the highest rates of depression and suicide, I was completely shocked.

Of course, thinking through the challenges of the job, it makes total sense.

But the issue clearly hasn't been getting enough attention.

A recent report from Australian dog food brand Royal Canin and the charity Love Your Pet, Love Your Vet spelled out some sobering data:

Vets were four-times more likely than the general population to commit suicide, with a heart-breaking 68% of veterinarians surveyed having lost a colleague to suicide.

Even at the less extreme ends of the spectrum, the stress, anxiety, burnout, and depression in the industry are catastrophic.

On top, the general public has no idea how bad the problem is — almost 80% of Australians surveyed were not aware of veterinary mental health issues at all.

The problem is just as bad in the USA and other parts of the World. But...

A report from the AVMA shows that things are getting (a little) better. Making more people aware will help.

a brown cat lying on the groundAnother cute pet break Photo by Simone Dalmeri on Unsplash

Despite being an underreported crisis, there are tons of groups fighting to make an impact here — dog food brands, non profits, professional trade organizations — and the good news it might just be making a difference.

The 2024 shows that the number of vets receiving counseling has nearly doubled in the last several years, in part thanks to an increase in veterinary practices offering mental health coverage and other assistance programs.

There's been a huge emphasis on preventive care, which early returns show has been working.

These changes taking place inside animal hospitals and vet practices are huge.

But there are a lot of things we can do as pet owners to make things better, too.

We can show our gratitude and say Thank You. We can not be jerks when a service costs more than we think it should. We can grieve or be upset or angry and not take it out on the veterinarian who's just trying to help.

Our pets are our family members, and many of us would do anything for them.

Now we have to take better care — MUCH better care — of the people who care for our pets.