Baby girl plays barista with her dad and it's an adorable masterclass in patient parenting
There's a reason 62 million people have tuned in to see this daddy-daughter duo making coffee together.
Sailor and her daddy making a coffee drink together
As any parent can attest, raising kids isn't easy. It can be fun and rewarding, though, if you're able to find the joy in helping a tiny human learn and look at messes and mistakes as necessary parts of that learning process.
A TikTok video showing a dad and his young daughter playing barista together has been viewed 62 million times in a week, partly because it's freaking adorable and partly because it's a prime example of patient, positive parenting.
The TikTok account @sailorkinsley went viral in 2021 for a video of baby Sailor pouring water into a glass. Since then, we've seen Sailor grow more and more skilled as her parents coach and encourage her in her learning.
In the wildly popular barista video, Sailor pours together some kind of Starbucks-style coffee drink with her dad sitting beside her and guiding her through each step. The interactions between them are as sweet as the drink appears to be.
There's so much to love about this video from a parenting perspective. Watch:
@sailorkinsley Coffee made by my mini 🫶🏽 #fyp
First of all, it took Sailor three tries to get the ice cubes in the glass, and all her daddy did was tell her to keep trying. He gave her the choice of whether she wanted to try squeezing the syrup into the glass, and when she said no, he still gave her a sense of ownership by asking her how much was enough.
When she tossed the lids of the containers and then the milk carton, he didn't overreact or disrupt the process; he just matter-of-factly said, "You gonna pick it up." When he said, "That's good, that's good, stop!" and it took her a second to stop pouring, he didn't criticize or push, but honored the time it takes a little one to process a command and coordinate the follow-through.
And when she overfilled the glass and spilled over the side and onto the table? No chastisement. Just encouragement. She can see the spill. She knows it happened. She'll get better and better at it the more she practices.
In fact, another video Sailor's mom shared shows just how far the wee one has come in the past year with her pouring skills. It's both peak cuteness and a visual of how it takes mistakes and time to make progress and grow.
@sailorkinsley Visit TikTok to discover videos!
It's even clear how much she's learning in the differences between the barista video shared on February 16 and this one shared on February 23. Check out how her skills improved in just a week:
@sailorkinsley Coffee made by my mini 🫶🏽 #fyp
People in the comments gushed over the adorableness of it all, and some shared how wonderful it was to see parents being so patient with their kids. A number of people shared that they would have been hit or yelled at for spilling while pouring, and many simply wouldn't have been given the opportunity to try at all.
"Imo the goal of parenting is teaching the kiddos how to be functioning adults," wrote on commenter on Reddit. "I'm in my 30s and still making messes in life. At this girl's age, the important lesson is learning shit happens sometimes and how to clean up the mess without getting upset or feeling like a failure. The whole patience thing is hard but perspective is key. For show or not, this dad is killing it."
"I’ve seen the mom and now the dad," wrote another. "This girl is truly lucky to have such loving parents. Just a reminder, to let people fail and help them instead of overcorrecting every behavior."
"It’s hard to break generational traits and habits, man," responded another. "Idk about y’all but I remember being terrified when I spilled as a kid. I have to fight my instinct to overreact to little sh*t all the time. Thankfully though, I’m trying to be more like the dad in this video every day."
It's hard to know what healthy, helpful parenting looks like if we haven't seen it modeled, so Sailor's parents are doing us all a service with these sweet little demonstrations. Keep up the good work, mom and pop.
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12 non-threatening leadership strategies for women
We mustn't hurt a man's feelings.
Men and the feels.
Note: This an excerpt is from Sarah Cooper's book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings.
In this fast-paced business world, female leaders need to make sure they're not perceived as pushy, aggressive, or competent.
One way to do that is to alter your leadership style to account for the fragile male ego.
Should men accept powerful women and not feel threatened by them? Yes. Is that asking too much?
IS IT?
Sorry, I didn't mean to get aggressive there. Anyhoo, here are twelve non-threatening leadership strategies for women.
Encourage.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When setting a deadline, ask your coworker what he thinks of doing something, instead of just asking him to get it done. This makes him feel less like you're telling him what to do and more like you care about his opinions.
Sharing ideas.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When sharing your ideas, overconfidence is a killer. You don't want your male coworkers to think you're getting all uppity. Instead, downplay your ideas as just "thinking out loud," "throwing something out there," or sharing something "dumb," "random," or "crazy."
Email requests.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pepper your emails with exclamation marks and emojis so you don't come across as too clear or direct. Your lack of efficient communication will make you seem more approachable.
Idea sharing.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
If a male coworker steals your idea in a meeting, thank him for it. Give him kudos for how he explained your idea so clearly. And let's face it, no one might've ever heard it if he hadn't repeated it.
Sexism.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you hear a sexist comment, the awkward laugh is key. Practice your awkward laugh at home, with your friends and family, and in the mirror. Make sure you sound truly delighted even as your soul is dying inside.
Mansplain.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Men love explaining things. But when he's explaining something and you already know that, it might be tempting to say, "I already know that." Instead, have him explain it to you over and over again. It will make him feel useful and will give you some time to think about how to avoid him in the future.
Mistakes.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pointing out a mistake is always risky so it's important to always apologize for noticing the mistake and then make sure that no one thinks you're too sure about it. People will appreciate your "hey what do I know?!" sensibilities.
Promotions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Asking your manager for a promotion could make you seem power- hungry, opportunistic, and transparent. Instead, ask a male coworker to vouch for you. Have your coworker tell your manager you'd be great for the role even though you don't really want it. This will make you more likely to actually get that promotion.
Rude.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Sometimes not everyone is properly introduced at the start of a meeting. Don't take it personally even if it happens to you all the time, and certainly don't stop the meeting from moving forward to introduce yourself. Sending a quick note afterward is the best way to introduce yourself without seeming too self-important.
Interruptions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you get interrupted, you might be tempted to just continue talking or even ask if you can finish what you were saying. This is treacherous territory. Instead, simply stop talking. The path of least resistance is silence.
Collaboration.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When collaborating with a man, type using only one finger. Skill and speed are very off-putting.
Disagreements.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When all else fails, wear a mustache so everyone sees you as more man-like. This will cancel out any need to change your leadership style. In fact, you may even get a quick promotion!
In conclusion...
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Many women have discovered the secret power of non-threatening leadership. We call it a "secret power" because no one else actually knows about it. We keep our power hidden within ourselves so that it doesn't frighten and intimidate others. That's what makes us the true unsung heroes of the corporate world.
About the Author: Sarah Cooper
Sarah Cooper is a writer, comedian, and author of 100 Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings. Her new book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings, is out now.
The comedic book cover.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
A satirical take on what it's like to be a woman in the workplace, Cooper draws from her experience as a former executive in the world of tech (she's a former Googler and Yahooer). You can get the book here.
This article was originally published on March 25, 2019.