50 years ago, today's size 00 was an 8. This viral post shows why vanity sizing must end.

"Stop believing the social normatives about who and what you should be."

Deena Shoemaker was going through her closet when she realized something odd: She had several pairs of pants in drastically different sizes.

It wasn't that she had gained or lost a lot of weight recently. Despite the varying sizes on the labels, each pair of pants fit her exactly the same. Shoemaker is simply a victim of something that plagues millions of people around the world: arbitrary clothing sizes. Some brands are "true to size" while others "run small" or "run large." Still others use "vanity sizing" like double- or triple-zero to make sizes seem smaller than they are.

Finding six pairs of pants that fit her the same in a range of sizes from 5 to 12 opened her eyes to just how ridiculous our clothing size system truly is. And as a mentor coach at Youth Horizons, a nonprofit organization that supports at-risk kids, Shoemaker knew that teen and tween girls felt her frustration magnified tenfold.


She decided to share photos of herself wearing the pants to show just how absurdly unstandardized clothing sizes are.

No I'm not selling my pants; I've just got a bone to pick. I've worked with teen & pre-teen girls as a leader and...

Posted by Deena Shoemaker on Saturday, December 10, 2016

She wrote the post as a letter of support to the girls she's worked with over the years, many of whom struggled with body image issues:

"I've have girls sob in my arms and ask me, 'if I were skinnier, would he have stayed?' I've counseled girls who were skipping meals. I've caught some throwing up everything they've just eaten."

She goes on to explain why she's not happy with the sizing discrepancy that exists across clothing brands:

"When you resize a girl's pants from a 9 to a 16 and label it 'plus size', how am I supposed to fight that? ... How do you expect me to convince her that she doesn't need to skip dinner for the next month because her pant size didn't *actually* go up by seven digits?"

Finally, she implored any girls reading the post to recognize that clothing size does not determine their worth as a person:

"My dear beautiful girls, my size 2 girls or my size 18 girls, your size doesn't determine your beauty; your life does."

There's truth to what Shoemaker found in her own closet: Clothing sizes have been jumping all over the place for the better part of a century.

Photo via iStock.

According to a report from Time, over 50 years ago, model Twiggy wore a size 8. Today, writer/comedian Mindy Kaling wears that same size. These two women have two very different body types. What used to be a size 8 is now considered a size 00.

So where did these crazy size fluctuations originate? Simply put, clothing manufacturers thought women would find their actual measurements on clothing unnerving, so they began a practice known as "vanity sizing" to make women's sizes appear smaller. The horrible irony is the same system that was designed to make women feel better about their size is now making them feel frustrated and confused every time they go shopping.

Thankfully, there are people in the fashion world fighting to make clothes shopping a more inclusive, less stressful experience for people with a range of body types.

Melissa McCarthy promoting her brand Seven7. Photo by Paul Conrad/Getty Images.

Companies like ModCloth are doing away with separate plus-size sections in favor of including extended sizes with their main clothing lines because separating larger sizes is a form of fat-shaming. Newer designers like Mallorie Dunn are featuring women of all sizes to model their clothes and show the world they're actually made for anyone to wear. More and more, we're seeing curvy and fat models, actresses, and designers featured in the fashion world.

But we still have a long way to go. No one should feel they have to change their body to fit into clothes — clothes should be designed to fit the beautiful spectrum of body types that exist in the world. Not only that, but clothing should be marked appropriately and practically. Creating new sizes to make customers feel better only makes it seem as though some body types should be hidden or ashamed to be seen.

As long as vanity sizing exists, young girls who are just growing into themselves and learning to be comfortable with their bodies will face frustration when they go shopping. That's why it's vital for them to have people like Shoemaker on their side telling them it's all just bullshit anyway.

As Shoemaker wrote on Facebook: "Stop believing the social normatives about who and what you should be. You are lovely and you are loved. Just exactly the way you are."

Family
Photo by Gregory Hayes on Unsplash

"Can I buy you a drink?" is a loaded question.

It could be an innocent request from someone who's interested in having a cordial conversation. Other time, saying "yes" means you may have to fend off someone who feels entitled to spend the rest of the night with you.

In the worst-case scenario, someone is trying to take advantage of you or has a roofie in their pocket.

Feminist blogger Jennifer Dziura found a fool-proof way to stay safe while understanding someone's intentions: ask for a non-alcoholic beverage or food. If they're sincerely interested in spending some time getting to know you, they won't mind buying something booze-free.

RELATED: States are starting to require mental health classes for all students. It's about dang time.

But if it's their intention to lower your defenses, they'll throw a mild tantrum after you refuse the booze. Her thoughts on the "Can I buy you a drink?" conundrum made their way to Tumblr.

via AshleysCo / Tumblr


via AshleysCo / Tumblr

The posts caught the attention of a bartender who knows there are lot of men out there whose sole intention is to get somone drunk to take advantage.

"Most of the time, when someone you don't know is buying you a drink, they're NOT doing it out of a sense of cordiality," the bartender wrote. "They're buying you a drink for the sole purpose of making you let your guard down."

So they shared a few tips on how to be safe and social when someone asks to buy you a drink.

From the other side of the bar, I see this crap all the time. Seriously. I work at a high-density bar, and let me tell you, I have anywhere from 10-20 guys every night come up and tell me to, "serve her a stronger drink, I'm trying to get lucky tonight, know what I mean?" usually accompanied with a wink and a gesture at a girl who, in my experience, is going to go from mildly buzzed to definitively hammered if I keep serving her. Now, I like to think I'm a responsible bartender, so I usually tell guys like that to piss off, and, if I can, try to tell the girl's more sober friends that they need to keep an eye on her.
But everyone- just so you know, most of the time, when someone you don't know is buying you a drink, they're NOT doing it out of a sense of cordiality, they're buying you a drink for the sole purpose of making you let your guard down.

Tips for getting drinks-

1. ALWAYS GO TO THE BAR TO GET YOUR OWN DRINK, DO NOT LET STRANGERS CARRY YOUR DRINKS. This is an opportune time for dropping something into your cocktail, and you're none the wiser.

2.IF YOU ORDER SOMETHING NON-ALCOHOLIC, I promise you, the bartender doesn't give two shits that you're not drinking cocktails with your friends, and often, totally understands that you don't want to let your guard down around strangers. Usually, you can just tell the bartender that you'd like something light, and that's a big clue to us that you're uncomfortable with whomever you're standing next to. Again, we see this all the time.

3. If you're in a position to where you feel uncomfortable not ordering alcohol:
Here's a list of light liquors, and mixers that won't get you drunk, and will still look like an actual cocktail:

X-rated + sprite = easy to drink, sweet, and 12% alcoholic content. Not strong at all, usually runs $6-$8, depending on your state.
Amaretto + sour= sweet, not strong, 26%.
Peach Schnapps+ ginger ale= tastes like mellow butterscotch, 24%.
Melon liquor (Midori, in most bars) + soda water = not overly sweet, 21%
Coffee liquor (Kahlua) +soda = not super sweet, 20%.
Hope this helps someone out!

RELATED: Permit denied for 'straight pride' parade in California

If you do accept a drink from someone at a bar and you want to talk, there's no need to feel obligated to spend the rest of the night with them.

Jaqueline Whitmore, founder of The Protocol School of Palm Beach, says to be polite you only have to "Engage in some friendly chit-chat, but you are not obligated to do more than that."

If someone asks to buy you a drink and you don't want it, Whitmore has a great tip. "Say thank you, but you are trying to cut back, have to drive or you don't accept drinks from strangers," Whitmore says.

What if they've already sent the drink over? "Give the drink to the bartender and tell him or her to enjoy it," Whitmore says.

Have fun. Stay safe, and make sure to bring a great wing-man or wing-woman with you.

Well Being
Photo by Artem Beliaikin on Unsplash

Jasmine has been used as a natural treatment for depression, anxiety, and stress for thousands of years. Oil from the plant has also been used to treat insomnia and PMS, and is considered a natural aphrodisiac. It turns out, our ancestor's instincts to slather on the oil when they wanted a little R&R were correct.

A study, published in the Journal of Biological Chemistry, and according to Professor Hanns Hatt of the Ruhr University in Bochum, Germany, revealed that jasmine can calm you down when you're feeling anxious.The results can "be seen as evidence of a scientific basis for aromatherapy."

"Instead of a sleeping pill or a mood enhancer, a nose full of jasmine from Gardenia jasminoides could also help, according to researchers in Germany. They have discovered that the two fragrances Vertacetal-coeur (VC) and the chemical variation (PI24513) have the same molecular mechanism of action and are as strong as the commonly prescribed barbiturates or propofol," says the study.

Keep Reading Show less
Nature


Rep. Peter King (R-NY) is a name you should remember. If you don't follow politics closely, remember his name because he's the first Republican in Congress to openly join the call for a renewed federal ban on assault weapons.

If you're a Democrat or a diehard progressive partisan, remember his name because it's proof that as a nation we can put principles before party and walk across the political aisle to get things done.

If you're a Republican, remember his name as evidence that real leadership in politics sometimes means risking your reputation to do what is right even when most of your colleagues disagree or lack the political courage to go first.

But let's allow Rep. King to explain himself in his own words:

Keep Reading Show less
Democracy