3 things you can do in your spare time to boost your confidence.
TED-Ed brings us 3 science-backed tips to become a more confident person.
"The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease forever to be able to do it," wrote J.M Barrie.
That line — appearing in the 1902 "Peter Pan" precursor "The Little White Bird" — is a perfect look at the power of confidence. "The reason birds can fly and we can't is simply that they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings," Barrie continued.
And while the latter part of his quote isn't exactly scientifically sound, it's not without merit.
For more than a century, we've remained fascinated with the story of Pan — the boy who never grew up, who lived without doubt. His is a story of pure, unfettered confidence. In a way, we all aspire to live a life so sure of ourselves.
A program from the first production of Barrie's "Peter Pan," staged February 1905 at the Duke of York's Theatre in London. Photo by Hulton Archive/Getty Images.
There are some major benefits to having confidence, and there are proven methods to boost it.
There's a saying that "confidence breeds success." But does it?
Science actually backs this up to a reasonable extent. Confidence can play a big role in how much success you experience in the workplace, in relationships, and even in your health. So let's take a look at how to get there.
If we can learn to fail, we can learn to succeed.
And no, I'm not about to push some "power of positive thinking" type tips nor am I going to tell you to run out and pick up a copy of "The Secret." Instead, let's take a look at some science-backed suggestions to becoming a more confident version of yourself, based off of a video from the people over at TED-Ed.
GIF via TED-Ed.
1. Give yourself a quick confidence boost by striking a "power pose."
Did you know you that something as simple as striking a powerful, confident pose can trick your brain into actually feeling more confident? Well, it can. Really.
Try this: Next time you're feeling nervous about something — like a job interview, for example — try taking a couple minutes right before and adopting this pose: Stand straight up, push your shoulders back and chest out, and place your hands on your hips.
Now THAT'S a power pose. Photo by iStock.
Studies have shown that this pose can lead to a short-term increase in confidence and reduction in stress. How does this work?
“Our nonverbals govern how we think and feel about ourselves. Our bodies change our minds," said Harvard Business School social psychologist Amy Cuddy in a 2012 TEDGlobal talk.
2. Convince yourself you have the ability to improve.
Now, this sounds like one of those "easier said than done" type suggestions, but it's actually not. Think about the things in your life you can't change and those you can. You can't change your eye color or your height, for example, but you can change your physical strength through training.
Photo by iStock.
Ask yourself if your goal is something you have the power to improve upon (even if improving might be really difficult). Is your goal to become a better public speaker? That's something you can improve upon. A better interviewer? That's a skill that can be honed. Have more upper body strength? With training, that's possible, too.
What you'll find is that there are very few things in life truly set in stone. We all have our own limitations, but as long as we can remind ourselves that we're not stuck, we have incentive to stay motivated.
3. Fail. Get up. Try again. Repeat.
You're going to fail, and that's a given. What matters much more than whether or not you fail is how you react to that setback. Do you get up? Do you regroup, come up with a new strategy, and try again? Or do you just throw in the towel?
Take a look at Michael Jordan, for example. He's a six-time NBA Finals champion, five-time Most Valuable Player, two-time Olympic gold medalist, and 2009 inductee into the basketball hall of fame. To many, he's considered the greatest player to ever play the game of basketball.
Michael Jordan is arguably the greatest player of all time but also a huge failure. Photo by Tim DeFrisco/Allsport/Getty Images.
But he's also someone who's experienced a lot of failure. Check out this voiceover from a 1997 Nike ad.
"I've missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed." — Michael Jordan
By the time Jordan's career finally came to an end in 2003, his missed shots totaled more than 12,000. Few of us will ever be as good at anything as Michael Jordan was at basketball. We will all fail. But do we get up? Do we try again? That's up to us.
If we can learn to fail, we can learn to succeed.
Beaver in water. Photo by 
An actual beaver dam on the now-thriving Price River
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A poster for the musical Les Miserables on a tall building. Photo by 
Lin Manuel Miranda at the Tony Awards. 
There's a reason why some people can perfectly copy accents, and others can't
Turns out, there's a neurodivergent link.
A woman in black long sleeve shirt stands in front of mirror.
Have you ever had that friend who goes on vacation for four days to London and comes back with a full-on Queen's English posh accent? "Oooh I left my brolly in the loo," they say, and you respond, "But you're from Colorado!" Well, there are reasons they (and many of us) do that, and usually it's on a pretty subconscious level.
It's called "accent mirroring," and it's actually quite common with people who are neurodivergent, particularly those with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). According Neurolaunch, the self-described "Free Mental Health Library," "Accent mirroring, also known as accent adaptation or phonetic convergence, is the tendency to unconsciously adopt the accent or speech patterns of those around us. This linguistic chameleon effect is not unique to individuals with ADHD, but it appears to be more pronounced and frequent in this population."
Essentially, when people have conversations, we're constantly "scanning" for information—not just the words we're absorbing, but the inflection and tone. "When we hear an accent, our brains automatically analyze and categorize the phonetic features, prosody, and intonation patterns," writes Neurolaunch. For most, this does result in copying the accent of the person with whom we're speaking. But those with ADHD might be more sensitive to auditory cues. This, "coupled with a reduced ability to filter out or inhibit the impulse to mimic…could potentially explain the increased tendency for accent mirroring."
While the article explains further research is needed, they distinctly state that, "Accent mirroring in individuals with ADHD often manifests as an unconscious mimicry of accents in social situations. This can range from subtle shifts in pronunciation to more noticeable changes in intonation and speech rhythm. For example, a person with ADHD might find themselves unconsciously adopting a Southern drawl when conversing with someone from Texas, even if they’ve never lived in the South themselves."
People are having their say online. On the subreddit r/ADHDWomen, a thread began: "Taking on accents is an ADHD thing?" The OP shares, "My whole life, I've picked up accents. I, myself, never noticed, but everyone around me would be like, 'Why are you talking like that??' It could be after I watched a show or movie with an accent or after I've traveled somewhere with a different accent than my 'normal.'
They continue, "Apparently, I pick it up fast, but it fades out slowly. Today... I'm scrolling Instagram, I watch a reel from a comedian couple (Darcy and Jeremy. IYKYK) about how Darcy (ADHD) picks up accents everywhere they go. It's called ADHD Mirroring??? And it's another way of masking."
(The OP is referring to Darcy Michaels and his husband Jeremy Baer, who are both touring comedians based in Canada.)
Hundreds of people on the Reddit thread alone seem to relate. One comments, "Omfg I've done this my whole life; I'll even pick up on the pauses/spaces when I'm talking to someone who is ESL—but English is my first language lol."
Sometimes, it can be a real issue for those around the chameleon. "I accidentally mimicked a waitress's weird laugh one time. As soon as she was out of earshot, my family started to reprimand me, but I was already like 'oh my god I don’t know why I did that, I feel so bad.'"
Many commenters on TikTok were shocked to find out this can be a sign of ADHD. One jokes, "Omg, yes, at a store the cashier was talking to me and she was French. She's like 'Oh are you French too? No, I'm not lol. I'm very east coast Canada."
And some people just embrace it and make it work for them. "I mirror their words or phrase! I’m 30. I realized I start calling everyone sweetie cause my manager does & I work at coffee shop."