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When 2 famous singers came out as gay — and 9 other great things that happened in 2014 country

Country music is sometimes criticized for not being very progressive. And with the rise of "bro country" in the past couple years, such criticisms are not entirely unfounded. But here's a list of some pretty awesome stuff that went down in the country music world in 2014.

1. Kacey Musgraves won two Grammys and bunch of other awards.

Background via Thinkstock. Quote from The Wall Street Journal.

Kacey Musgraves is amazing. She's a popular female country artist who — *GASP* — actually sings about things other than trucks, beer, and gettin' it on. Her 2013 album, "Same Trailer Different Park," features the song "Follow Your Arrow," which is based on not letting the haters get you down. It goes, "Make lots of noise, kiss lots of boys, or kiss lots of girls if that's something you're into." Besides, Musgraves has been writing hit songs for country artists for years — 'bout time she got some more recognition!

Just to tally it all up, in 2014, Musgraves won two Grammy Awards (for Best Country Song and Best Country Album), an Academy of Country Music Award (for Album of the Year), and a Country Music Association Award (for Song of the Year).

2. Maddie & Tae took the scene by storm with "Girl in a Country Song."

The teen duo consisting of Maddie Marlow and Tae Dye debuted their first hit single, "Girl in a Country Song," in mid-2014. The song is (a) VERY CATCHY, (b) so on point, and (c) really impressive for a debut single. And the video is hilarious as well, so check that out when you can.

My absolute favorite line is this: "We used to get a little respect. Now, we're lucky if we even get to climb up in your truck, keep my mouth shut, and ride along down some old dirt road we don't even want to be on, and be the girl in a country song." So good!

3. On Nov. 20, 2014, Ty Herndon came out as gay.

Ty Herndon may be best known for his 1996 hit "Living in a Moment." But he's back in the country scene making a splash with a recent announcement that he's gay — and in a happy, long-term relationship. He came out in an exclusive interview with Entertainment Tonight.

Background via Thinkstock. Quote via Entertainment Tonight.

4. A few hours later, Billy Gilman came out as gay.

This just gets better and better! Just a few hours after the news about Ty Herndon, 26-year-old Billy Gilman (known for "One Voice," his first single at age 11, and more recently "Say You Will") posted a video to YouTube in which he let the world know he's gay.

And to make the story even BETTER, the great LeAnn Rimes took to Twitter in support of each star.

5. Brad Paisley made fun of the Westboro Baptist Church by taking a selfie with them outside of his concert.

OK, now this one is just hilarious. In June 2014, Brad Paisley spotted some angry picketers outside his concert in Kansas. Now, Paisley is famous for the 2005 song "Alcohol" and seems to post on Instagram about moonshine regularly. I can't tell you whether or not he drinks alcohol, or whether or not he's religious, but I can tell you that he took to Instagram to make fun of the picketers outside his summer concert.


Westboro Baptist Selfie!! Or west-Burro(ass) selfie. Hopefully they can hear the show out here. We'll play loud.
A photo posted by Brad Paisley (@bradpaisley) on

Did you see that witty caption? It says, "Westboro Baptist Selfie!! Or west-Burro(ass) selfie. Hopefully they can hear the show out here. We'll play loud."

6. Kira Isabella took a stand against rape culture with her song "Quarterback."

Image via Thinkstock. Lyrics from "Quarterback."

Kira Isabella is a Canadian country music artist (they exist!) who released her first single in 2011. Her most recent album, "Caffeine & Big Dreams," features the single "Quarterback." In the song, a young girl gets invited to a party by the quarterback of the football team. He gets her drunk, they have sex (her first time), and the next day she is horrified to find pictures of the incident posted all over the Internet. The lyrics leave the story intentionally unclear — What really happened that night? Who did or said what? — but when the whole town takes sides, no one takes the girl's, and no one believes that she was wronged in any way (which, let's just say it, is some serious bullsh*t 'cause that sh*t was definitely not consensual).

Image by Raymond Santos, used under a Creative Commons license. Quote from ThinkProgress.

The song "Quarterback" was written by Rivers Rutherford, Bobby Hamrick, and Marti Dodson. Fun fact: According to this article, the song was pitched to Carrie Underwood, but her team turned it down.

7. Steve Grand kept being Steve Grand.

Steve Grand is acclaimed by some as the first popular country musician to start a career already out of the closet. In March 2014, he ran a successful Kickstarter campaign to fund his first full-length album featuring the hit 2013 single "All-American Boy." The success of that fundraiser — as well as his 2014 singles "Back to California" and "Time" — prove that he's not leaving the country music scene any time soon.

Here's a clip from the video for "All-American Boy," which was super popular on the Internet when it came out in 2013.

I can't imagine why. It's not like he's adorable or anything. JEEZE.

8. Glen Campbell "sung out" about his battle with Alzheimer's.

In 2011, Glen Campbell (of "Rhinestone Cowboy" — you'd know it if you heard it) announced that he had been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease, a degenerative disease for which there is no cure. In October 2014, Campbell released one final song to make us all cry (and so everyone would remember the music he's all about).

Image by Arnielee, used under a Creative Commons license. Lyrics from "I'm Not Gonna Miss You."

Be sure to catch the whole music video for "I'm Not Gonna Miss You."

9. Sheryl Crow sent out this plea on Twitter (and then defended it).

After listening to the radio for over an hour without hearing a single female voice, Sheryl Crow took to Twitter with a plea:

Later, in a radio interview, Crow stood by her initial tweet.

Original image via Thinkstock. Quote from interview with KNCI 105.1.

10. Kenny Chesney called out the genre for objectification of women.

In a recent interview with Billboard magazine, Kenny Chesney spoke out against the "bro country" we've all been hearing so much of.

Image by LawrenceFung, used under a Creative Commons license. Quote from Billboard.

He gets props for that, for sure, but let's not be too quick to fawn over him as The Savior of Objectified Damsels in Distress. In another interview he explains, "I am learning that when you write songs about women, the perfect place to start is their spirit." I don't really want Kenny Chesney writing anything about my spirit, so the whole thing feels a little "eyeroll-y" still, but we'll let him stick around on our list all the same.

11. Garth Brooks cancelled his appearance on NBC's "The Tonight Show" after Darren Wilson was not indicted.

Image via Thinkstock


Post by Garth Brooks.

On Nov. 25, 2014, (the day after the announcement that Darren Wilson, the officer who shot Michael Brown, would not be indicted — a day of massive civil unrest in our country), Garth Brooks announced via his Facebook page that he had cancelled his Thanksgiving appearance on NBC's "The Tonight Show." He said, "To spend the day promoting our stuff like nothing was wrong seemed distasteful to me." While that's really the only hint we've got as to what his reasoning was, I think it's safe to say this was a pretty bold and respectful move on his part.

So what do ya say? Is it finally time to admit to the world that country music has stolen your heart (and radio)? I'd say so.

And finally, there's no way I covered every awesome thing about the 2014 country music scene. Know of any big progressive moments that I missed? Get at me! I'd love to hear about 'em on Twitter, @meganhazel.


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5 ways people are going "all in" this week

From the silly to the sentimental, here are five ways people on the internet have been giving it their all.

5 ways people are going "all in" this week
5 ways people are going "all in" this week
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Going “all in” is its own kind of magic. Whether it’s a wildly energetic karaoke performance, a full-blown birthday bash for an elderly Chihuahua, or an over-the-top homecoming proposal (more on that in a moment), there’s something undeniably joyful about witnessing pure, unfiltered enthusiasm. Seeing that kind of passion and creativity, you can’t help but smile.

To celebrate that all-or-nothing spirit, we’ve rounded up some of the internet’s finest examples (at least for this week) of people fully committing to the bit. Prepare to be impressed, amazed, and maybe even a little inspired to go “all in” yourself.

1. This high school biology project

@jimcheo jordin sparks said it best #funny #funnyvideos ♬ No Air (feat. Chris Brown) - Jordin Sparks

Oh, to be in high school again. The days where you could be as silly as you wanted and still somehow get an A (for effort). This student-made video—a project for biology class, explaining the respiratory system—is the perfect example of a high school assignment, as well as a great example of someone truly going “all in.” Does this explain the respiratory system? Kind of! But is it full of creativity, passion, and genuine hilarity? Absolutely. The dedication it took to make this video alone—and the enthusiasm of the kids that made it—certainly deserves an A.

2. The Grandma Stand

One thing that’s great to go “all in” on is spreading cheer and joy—and that’s what our friends are doing this week with The Grandma Stand.

The premise is simple: You’ve got a grandma at a booth who gets people talking about the good stuff in their lives. Today’s question? What’s one small thing that brings you joy? The answers are sweet and thoughtful, and the result is a whole lot of goodwill (and hugs!) between total strangers. That’s always lovely to see.

Another thing we like to go “all in” on? Saving money. And right now our friends at All In are giving us a fantastic deal on some seriously tasty snacks. To get a free (!!!) box of their organic snack bars, sign up with your phone number on Aisle, grab two boxes of All In bars at Sprouts, snap a pic of your receipt, and text it through Aisle. They’ll Venmo or PayPal you back for the cost of one box, and then all you have left to do is enjoy your new favorite treat. Easy peasy.

3. This extremely specific HOCO proposal 

@dawson002256 best hoco proposal ever #fyp #hoco #viral #proposal ♬ original sound - .

Speaking of high school: Gone are the days where you can simply walk up to someone in the hallway and ask them to be your date to homecoming or prom. Kids these days are starting their own tradition—elaborate staged “proposals” in order to officially pop the question: Will you go to the dance with me?

Homecoming proposals are a perfect example of going “all in,” just by themselves—but this particular one is truly special. The creator shares that she loves sharks and is afraid of butterflies, so for a truly unique and heartfelt “proposal,” her potential date actually dresses up like a shark and stages a massive fight with his friends—all dressed in butterfly costumes—on her front lawn. The commitment, the creativity—it’s all here, on full display. (And she said yes, by the way!)

4. The Anthropologie rock prank 

@phoebeadams112

His full on crash out at the end HAHA

♬ original sound - Phoebe Adams

The internet has been obsessed with this viral prank, and it’s not hard to see why: Not only is it hilarious, the women who are doing the pranking are truly committing to the bit.

The prank started with one content creator, Phoebe Adams, who posted a TikTok of her unboxing a package in front of her boyfriend, Dan. Adams, bursting with excitement, pries open the box to reveal…a rock. But this isn’t any ordinary rock, she explains, gushing over how “perfect” it is. This particular rock is one-of-a-kind, from the bougie retail chain Anthropologie—and it only cost $150. It was on sale!

Dan, rightfully, is horrified and confused. But Adams keeps on torturing him: “This isn’t a regular rock! It’s a one-of-a-kind rock they found on the ground.” (“That’s where rocks COME FROM!” --Dan)

The best part is that this prank quickly went viral, and other creators are following in Adams’ footsteps. Husbands and dads everywhere are confused. It's mayhem. And probably the funniest thing that's happened on the internet this year.

(Even Anthropologie (the brand) has gotten in on the fun. That’s true commitment.)

5. The most elaborate (and fun) wedding entrance we've ever seen 

@benaholtzman Nothing says ‘forever’ like forcing your friends to learn the dance from Miss Congeniality 💍✨ #oneinamillion #weddingtok #weddingentrance #misscongeniality ♬ original sound - Ben Holtzman

We’ve all seen the movie Miss Congeniality, right? For those of you who weren’t teenage girls growing up in the early aughts, allow us to break it down: Sandra Bullock plays Grace Hart, a frazzled special agent working for the FBI. After an extensive makeover (because every movie from the late nineties and early aughts loved a good makeover montage), Gracie enters the Miss America Pageant undercover as Gracie Lou Freebush to prevent an act of terrorism that’s been threatened to go down during the competition. Long story short, it’s a feel-good classic with some of the most memorable movie lines in cinema. (“What is your idea of a perfect date?” “I’d have to say April 25th, because it’s not too hot, not too cold—all you need is a light jacket!”)

In the movie, the contestants all enter the stage to introduce themselves to the audience in a choreographed number to the song “One in a Million”—and so that’s exactly what these two grooms (presumably huge fans of the movie) have done for their wedding entrance. The choreographed sequence involves the grooms and their wedding party (and maybe even some of the guests), and they all truly give an unforgettable performance. Whether you’re a fan of this movie or you’ve never seen it, this wedding entrance really is one in a million.

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Man visits his empty home and discovers squatters, so he moves in with them

Talk about toxic roomies.

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A couple moves boxes into their new home

Picture it: you buy a new home knowing it's a bit of a fixer upper, but it's yours. You're expecting to move in slowly while you work on the house, but when you make your way to your new-to-you home, someone is already living there. Or maybe you're selling a home that's been sitting vacant and when the realtor gets there to show the property, someone has moved in. What do you do?

The logical answer would be to call the police because, clearly, there are intruders in your home who have made it their own. You have all the paperwork showing you own the property so it should be a no brainer. Wrong.

Marco Velazquez had this very situation happen when trying to sell a vacant home that he owns. When he reached out to the local authorities, he was informed that the people who moved into his home unlawfully cannot be forced out.

Under the current law in Illinois where the incident took place, squatters have rights and the police cannot forcibly remove squatters from the home. It's unclear if the squatters were scammed or if they were aware the property was not legally theirs as they presented police officers with mortgage paperwork, but the mortgage company listed did not exist.

squatters, squatters' rights, homeowner rights, Marco Velazquez, property dispute, Illinois law, moving in with squatters, viral story, real estate nightmare, eviction Row of boarded-up homesCanva

No matter how the couple came about living in the home, it wasn't legally theirs. There needed to be a resolution, but they weren't interested in leaving. That's when the homeowner decided to come up with something a little out of the box: Velazquez decided if the people in his home couldn't be removed, they'd be getting a new roommate–him.

"I said I'm not moving out and I said at one point they gotta leave, they gotta get tired of us being in the property. I called a couple of friends to stay overnight and I knew they were not gonna like that," Velazquez says to ABC 7 Chicago.

The homeowner moved in with his wife and several friends, bringing air mattresses and blankets determined to tire out the squatters. However, it quickly became apparent that the illegal tenants were not planning to move out. In actuality, the morning after Velazquez moved in, the squatters demanded he pay them $8,000 for them to move out. While the stunt of moving in with squatters was a Hail Mary, Velazquez knew that the arrangement wasn't safe and heard stories of squatters staying for months.

squatters, squatters' rights, homeowner rights, Marco Velazquez, property dispute, Illinois law, moving in with squatters, viral story, real estate nightmare, eviction A man walks down a alleyCanva

Instead of continuing to wait out the squatters, the man started negotiations with the couple to get them out of his house so it could be sold. He paid the couple $4,300 to leave his home. Shortly after the pair moved out, he learned that the woman had previously been arrested after squatting in someone else's home. Velazquez is hoping that he can also bring charges against the woman and her male partner for squatting in his home.

"We didn't want to give them money but we heard really bad stories about squatters taking over properties six, eight, ten months, even a year," Velazquez says. "I heard stories before about squatters. I never thought it was going to happen to me."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

This article originally appeared earlier this year. It has been updated.

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Simple 60-second test could give major clues as to how long you'll live

Ironically, the move is called a "dead" hang.

via Ketut Subiyanto/Pexels and Dinielle De Veyra/Pexels

How long can you hang out? The answer may say a lot about your potential lifespan.

Here's a morbid question: Would you really want to know how long you have to live? On one hand, it’d probably inspire you to go out and complete your bucket list. On the other, it may be depressing to know just how many days you have left. Well, science has yet to discover a way to determine the average person's life expectancy, but some indicators can show whether someone is in danger of having their life cut short by deteriorating health.

You could, if you were so inspired, shell out a bunch of money for fancy genetic and biological testing. Chasing immortality is all the rage with billionaires, so if you've got the money, you can find out an awful lot about how long you're likely to live.

Or you could just hit the gym or local playground and find out for free.

A study published by Clinical Interventions in Aging in 2019 determined that handgrip strength can be a reliable proxy for how long one has to live, or longevity.

One of the best ways to judge handgrip strength is to time how long you can hang from a bar. To test your grip strength, find yourself a pull-up bar, whether at a gym or local park, take a deep breath, and start hanging. Don't worry, you don't need to be able to do a pull up!

Ironically, the move is called a "dead hang." So-called, because you literally just hang there for as long as possible.

The literature revealed that 30 seconds is a good target for women and 60 is an excellent goal for men.

Therefore, if you go longer than the goal, you’re looking at a long life. But if you can’t quite get there, your life may be shorter than you’d like.

longevity, aging, living long, getting older, seniors, dying, mortality, health, fitness, longevity test Cats are undefeated in grip strength. Giphy

Dr. Peter Attia, founder of Early Medical and author of Outlive: The Science and Art of Longevity (2023), believes that grip strength is a great way to determine one’s overall health.

“It's just a great proxy for overall body strength and muscle mass, but I think it's also a very functional form of strength,” he said on The Drive podcast. “Basically, everything in your upper body is mediated through your hands. And if your grip is weak, everything downstream of that is weak. When you watch someone who's got a weak grip deadlifting it's very difficult for them to deadlift correctly because they don't create a proper wedge."

There are may ways to measure grip strength, but the dead hang is likely the simplest. When you think about it, it requires an incredible combination of shoulder mobility, spinal stability, core strength, and overall fitness. Not only are these all positive biological health markers, they're also all key to preventing falls as we get older.

Regularly practicing the dead hang, on the other hand, has incredible benefits including stretching your muscles and deloading your joints and spine, giving them a much needed rest.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Doctors Eve M. Glazier and Elizabeth Ko at UCLA Health say poor grip strength is connected to numerous diseases. “Research continues to link a decline in grip strength to a range of adverse health issues, including heart disease, arthritis, osteoporosis, Type 2 diabetes and certain cancers. It has also been found to be a predictor of the likelihood of post-surgical complications, post-surgical recovery time and mortality,” they wrote on the UCLA Health blog.

Weight can also significantly affect how long a person can hang from a bar. So, do lighter people have an unfair advantage over those on the heavier side? Well, weight is also an important indicator of longevity. A study published in Aging Cell found a direct correlation between increased body mass and decreased longevity.

Other studies have elaborated on the findings: More important than your absolute grip strength and dead hang ability may be how it changes over time. Losing grip strength is a negative sign for your overall health, but maintaining or even building it is associated with better outcomes.

Another good reason to hit the gym regularly, at any age. No matter where you're starting, you want to do everything you can to maintain that level of strength as long as possible.

The good news for people who didn’t quite make their hang time goal is that you can improve it by practicing dead hangs.


longevity, aging, living long, getting older, seniors, dying, mortality, health, fitness, longevity test Practicing dead hangs will help you maintain grip strength no matter what your starting point. Photo by Charlotte Karlsen on Unsplash

How to perform a dead hang (according to Healthline):

  • Use a secure overhead bar. Use a step or bench to reach the bar with your arms easily. You don’t want to jump straight into a dead hang.
  • Grip the bar with an overhand grip (palms facing away from you). Aim to keep your arms shoulder-width apart.
  • Move your feet off the step or bench so you’re hanging on to the bar.
  • Keep your arms straight and stay relaxed.
  • If you’re new to the exercise, hang for 10 seconds. Then, work your way up to 45 seconds to 1 minute at a time.
  • Slowly step back onto the step or bench before releasing your arms. Repeat up to 3 times if you wish.
Grip strength is so strongly correlated with longevity that many medical professionals advocate for it being considered a true biomarker. A biomarkers is a regularly measured state of the body that's used as a key health indicator, like blood pressure or cholesterol. Grip strength, some say, should be regularly evaluated at medical check ups as an indicator of healthy aging.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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These 4 words can keep a conversation flowing forever no matter how bad you are at small talk

There's literally no way to screw this up.

Credit: Canva

A couple talking over coffee.

Many people find making small talk to be an excruciating experience. They think it’s boring to talk with a stranger about the weather, sports, or weekend plans. They may also feel like they don’t have anything to contribute to the conversation, or they don’t understand the point of having one in the first place.

However, those who excel at making small talk have a tremendous advantage in their professional and romantic relationships, as well as forming new friendships. Most importantly, small talk is a window to transition into medium talk or, eventually, deep, meaningful conversations. The problem is that many people get stuck in small talk, and things stall before progressing to something beneficial.

conversation, friends, small talk, chatting Two women chatting in front of a fire. Credit: Atlantic Ambience/Pexels

How to get better at small talk

The great thing is that, like anything, making small talk is a skill that we can all improve by learning some simple conversation techniques. One technique that is great for keeping a conversation going, like hitting a ball back and forth past a net in tennis, is a simple statement:

"It reminds me of…”

A Redditor recently shared some great examples of how the phrase can be used to turn a mundane topic, such as the weather, into something much more fun:

Them: "It's been really rainy, huh?"

You:

Option 1 (Personal Story): "Yeah, it reminds me of a time I went on a run in the rain and nearly got hit by a car."

Option 2 (Music / Pop Culture): "It reminds me of every Adele song. When I'm driving, I feel like I'm in a music video."

Option 3 (Family): "It reminds me of my dad, he used to love playing with us in the rain as kids."

Option 4 (Thing you watched / World News): "It reminds me of this documentary I saw where they're trying to make it rain in the Sahara Desert.”

Option 5 (Place you lived): “It reminds me of when I lived in Australia, it barely ever rained there. I actually love this weather.”


- YouTube www.youtube.com

You see in this example that using “It reminds me of…” opened up the conversation to five potential new and more exciting topics. The “You” in the story could have responded with, “Yeah, it sure is rainy,” and the conversation would have ended right there. But instead, branching off the topic of rain into something a bit deeper took the conversation to the next level. You get extra points if you can take the “reminds me of” into a topic that you assume the other person will be interested in.

What’s a polite way to change the topic in a conversation?

Using “this reminds me of…” is also a polite way to move the topics in another direction, especially when it's a topic that you don’t want to discuss or one that makes you feel a bit uncomfortable. Or, if it’s a situation where the other person is monologuing on one topic for a very long time, this makes it easy to transition away from their diatribe.

conversation, small talk, chatting, cafe Two guys chat at a cafe. Credit: Helena Lopes/Pexels

Ultimately, the phrase is an excellent way for you to save the person you’re talking to from being stuck in the small talk rut as well. It shows you understand that when someone brings up the weather, they are merely getting things started with something both of you have in common. They probably don’t want to talk about the weather for 30 minutes, unless they are a meteorologist. “It reminds me of…” is an invitation to go a bit deeper and shows the other person that you’d like to learn more about them.

This article originally appeared in April. It has been updated.


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Ask kids this basic question to instantly make them more cooperative — the answer doesn't matter

Just by asking and listening, you've already won.

via Hunter Johnson/Unsplash

This trick can fix any attitude.

Raising kids can be a frustrating experience, no matter how rewarding you also find it. Sometimes, it can feel like half of parenting is repeating yourself over and over again, asking your child to brush their teeth or take a dish from the living room to the sink. It’s exhausting and makes you feel like a nag. Don't you wish there was a simple way to make your kids listen the first time?

Dr. Rebecca Kennedy, aka “Dr. Becky,” is a clinical psychologist and founder and CEO of Good Inside who says she has a quick way to make your kids more cooperative and less rude. Talk about killing two soul-crushing birds with one parenting stone. Dr. Becky got into psychology after struggling with anorexia as a teenager.

“Okay, no matter how old your kid is, you can use this 15-second tip to decrease rudeness and increase cooperation,” she says in a TikTok video with over 32,000 views. “Find your child today and ask them this question. 'Hey, I was just wondering, what could I do better as your parent?'”

parents, children, child, parenting, trick, communication A mom and son talk on the couch.Canva Photos

The psychologist says that even if the child has a random or impractical answer such as “Let me stay up ‘til midnight” or “I’d like to eat macaroni and cheese for breakfast, lunch and dinner,” just to listen. Simply by listening, you can change your child’s behavior.

She says we should also ask more questions to further the conversation: “Tell me more. What would that be like?”

@drbeckyatgoodinside

Want to improve your relationship with your kid in less than 15 seconds? Watch this reel for a quick-win strategy. The best part: When we use strategies like this in calm moments, we reduce the frequency of difficult moments with our kids. Of course, I’m a realist… I know you need in-the-moment strategies too! Cue: My Conquering Problem Behaviors Workshop. You’ll get an entire toolbox of in-the-moment and outside-the-moment strategies for reducing outbursts and strengthening your bond with your kid. Learn more in the link in bio!

“I mean, imagine your boss coming to you randomly and asking how they could be a better manager to you. Just by asking the question and listening,” she continued. Dr. Becky says that asking our kids how we’re doing as parents communicates three essential ideas: “I care about you. I respect you. I'm invested in this relationship.”

This type of questioning builds a connection with a child that can spill over into other behaviors. “You're building connection. And with more connection always comes more cooperation,” she ends the video.

The big takeaway from the video is that when we enhance our connection with our kids, they will be less likely to disobey or be rude because they feel heard and respected, so there’s no need to act out. They will also return that respect by listening to you when you have a request, such as taking out the trash or putting down their phone and coming to dinner.

Some people in the comments got funny responses when they asked their kids what they could improve. “I asked my 5yr old. I got a mildly scathing look and she said ‘erm, maybe try and burn dinner less next time?’” one parent wrote. “My 5 yo told me to look better and get a haircut,” another added.

Dr. Becky’s quick question is a great way for parents to strengthen their relationships when things are going well instead of trying to forge connections during conflict. It’s a great reminder that even when parenting, an ounce of prevention is a pound of cure.

family, parents, kids, parenting, bonding A happy family.Canva Photos

Dr. Becky sums up the importance of prevention in her TikTok caption: “When we use strategies like this in calm moments, we reduce the frequency of difficult moments with our kids,” she wrote.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

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Woman who saw the 'fake news' era coming secretly recorded everything she could for 30 years

It took four shipping containers to transport Marion Stokes' tapes to be digitally archived.

Photo credit: Canva/Marion Stokes via Wikimedia

Woman secretly recorded everything for 30 years, predicting rise of 'fake news.'

Fake news is something that is said so often that it seems to have taken on an alternate meaning. If someone dislikes something, they often claim it's fake news. If a news station reports something that contradicts a deeply held belief, a person may dismiss it as fake news. However, in reality, fake news is propaganda that aims to persuade viewers to believe something that contradicts factual information that can be proven.

Marion Stokes, concerned about the possibility of people attempting to deny factual national or global events, decided she'd be the keeper of the truth. The determined woman began recording news broadcasts on her VCR in 1979 as a means to preserve the truth, showcasing how the story evolved over time with different news outlets and varying viewpoints.

Marion Stokes; secret recordings; VHS; VCR tapes; recording news; fake news Retro vibes: setting up for a classic VHS movie night!Photo credit: Canva

Stokes's recordings didn't stop when one news broadcast was over. The frequent Philadelphia Current Affairs guest would record the news 24 hours a day, every day of the week, in an effort to capture the 24-hour news cycle. Yes, even when she was asleep, the news was being recorded. In a 2023 interview with the BBC, her son, Michael Metelits, explains her reasoning and how she did it.

"There were probably between five to six, sometimes up to eight, video cassette recorders in different rooms. And she or her assistant would scurry between the rooms, changing the video cassettes. They would be set to different channels, each one would have a pile of video cassettes next to it," he tells the outlet. "She really felt that preserving the 24-hour news cycle would...if people had access to that information, would enable people to make better decisions about politics and understand how news media worked a bit better, by seeing how the story changed over time, by providing access to sometimes alternative perspectives, but sometimes a range of perspectives."

Metelits further explains that he could see the value of people being able to witness how a story evolved, but that his mother possessed a compulsion that couldn't be denied. Stokes recorded news broadcasts from 1979 until her death in 2012, accumulating a collection of over 70,000 videotapes that contained entire news broadcasts. It required multiple shipping containers to house the tapes and send them to the Internet Archive, where they were digitized and uploaded for public access.

She didn't just collect video recordings of news broadcasts; she also had a newspaper collection from multiple newspaper subscriptions, hundreds of magazines, and multiple Macintosh computers. In fact, her interest in Macintosh computers led to her in-laws becoming very wealthy after Stokes encouraged them to invest in the company in its early years. Whether intentionally or due to her supposed undiagnosed hoarding condition, Stokes was an archivist determined to document things that might otherwise become lost. Thanks to her decades of unpaid work, people have access to broadcasts that may have otherwise been lost to time.

A documentary was released in 2019 about Stokes, who was also a producer of public access television. The film Recorder: The Marion Stokes Project premiered at the Tribeca Film Festival before being theatrically released and subsequently released on streaming services, where it is still available to watch.

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