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Why these 77 alternatives to Black Friday are way cooler than that new gadget.

So you’re thinking of getting up at 3 a.m. on Black Friday?

Image via iStock.

With five barely digested portions of your Thanksgiving dinner in your belly, you're contemplating getting up at 3:00 in the morning. You may not be one of the over 25 million people working retail, and yet, you just know you'll find yourself trudging through the darkness en route to your local shopping center on Friday. It'll probably be cold. You might have that frost/mini-snowflake pattern thing crusting up on your windshield and the defrost won't kick in as fast as you'd like. I get it. You want to get that newest shiny toy for a moderate discount — for you or your family. Totally understandable.


But maybe you don't. Maybe you're going because everyone else is going. Maybe you're going because it's tradition. Maybe you're going just to see if there's anything you want to buy yourself. Maybe you'd rather do anything but shop on the biggest shopping day of the year.

So before you set that pre-dawn alarm on Friday, might I suggest...

77 other things you could do with your time on Black Friday:

1. Call* those who couldn’t be with you and yours on Thanksgiving.

You’ll be surprised how just a simple conversation can mean more than a million thanks.

*yes, call, don’t text

2. Donate to a charity that will help those less fortunate.

(And don’t post about it on social media ... you’ll thank yourself later.)

3. Move that football game with your buddies to Friday instead of Thursday during the day.

You’ll be rested and less likely to break your wrist trying to imitate Odell Beckham Jr. while wearing dungarees.

4. Have you ever tried sleeping in?

I do it once a month and it is the best thing ever.

5. Go to a park.

It will likely be the emptiest it’s ever been (though, if this idea takes off, sorry in advance if you walk into Woodstock).

6. This list is very important:

A book, a blanket, a cuppa, and a window. Trust me.

Image via iStock.

7. Volunteer at a soup kitchen.

Balance out the abundance of Thanksgiving dinner with providing sustenance for those in need.

8. Write letters.*

To relatives, old friends, Amnesty International, or your favorite teacher or mentor.

*actual letters, not FB messages or anything involving an IP address

9. Listen to the Beatles.

Because there's nothing you can do that can't be done.

10. Make a December 1 resolution.

Get a month ahead of the curve and start those crazy things you’re thinking of doing for two weeks in January.

11. Eat all the leftovers.

Think about how much more of them you can eat if you don’t have to wake up at 3 a.m. to wait in line to buy an off-brand Blu-ray player for $17.

12. Watch all the movies.

There are some amazing movies with and without Benedict Cumberbatch in them out there. You should go see them.

13. Follow up on those things you said you were thankful for the day before.

Sometimes we go though the motion and thank everything we can think of before dinner on Thanksgiving because we’re just sitting there waiting to regret the third serving of canned cranberry. Go through that list and see how you can show your thanks.

14. Research the 2018 midterm elections.

Sorry, did I put you to sleep there? If you want change, now is the time to get involved and see how the races are shaping up. Presidential elections have turned into reality shows ... oh, how they did ... but hardly anyone votes in the midterms because they’re so borrrrring. Look up what happened to Obama’s power in 2010 and if that nightmare isn’t enough to shake up some activism in you, then just wait till Jan. 20.

15. Rewatch every episode of "Westworld" five times.

Because WHAT DOOR?

Image from "Westworld"/HBO.

16. That closet/shed/storage space/shelf/cabinet that has all the stuff in it?

Clean it out, organize it from (a) "Things that you definitely don’t need to keep" to (b) "That wrinkly pea coat that you’ll definitely need in a few weeks."

17. Winter-proof your home!

With 30 years of New England winters under my belt, I feel your cold pain, my northern friends. This is less important for me, living in Los Angeles now, but for those of you in cooler climates, Black Friday is the perfect time to see what energy-saving steps you can take to save money and stay warmer through the winter.

18. Netflix and chill your leftover turkey.

Or reheat it. But make sure you have enough because Netflix will suck you in for days. (Yes, Netflix, I am still watching "Sense8." STOP ASKING ME.)

19. Does "aunt" rhyme with "haunt" or "ant"?

You talk to her roughly three times a year, maybe now's the time to dig down deep and finally answer the question of how it’s pronounced.

20. Plan or dream of a vacation outside your comfort zone.

I hear Argentina is lovely around the last third of January, or perhaps a nice jaunt to Manitoba in the spring. Hop online and do some research on places you’ve never dreamed of going. Hot tip? Mexico City is super affordable, close, and nothing short of stunning.

21. Who is your representative in Congress? Do you know?

Aha! Gotcha! Really, though — imagine there was no Google: How would you get in touch with the most important government employee responsible for representing you? Mine is Adam B. Schiff, and not only is he awesome, but I’ve had the pleasure of interviewing him. His advice on how to have your voice heard? Call your representative. It’s that simple.

Image via iStock.

22. Have a friendly game night.

We all know every game of Monopoly ends up in a huge fight, so plan accordingly, and make sure to bankrupt the uncle who voted for Donald Trump as fast as possible.

23. Check out the latest books at Kirkus Reviews.

I know that this might lead to some kind of shopping. But they just released their "Best Of" lists for the year, and personally, I’m 100% excited to get "Super Extra Grande" before then and just take a minute and #6.

24. Craft day with the kids!

Instead of rushing into a department store and wading around like a sardine trapped in oil all day, grab the kids and grab some crafting materials and just create some hideous — I mean, beautiful — artwork for the fridge.

25. No kids? Craft day with yourself!

No kids here either. (It’s OK. Really. Where is this obsession with everyone having kids? Not everyone wants kids, OK? Some of us just want to do our solo craft projects in peace.)

So let’s make some awesome stuff.

Like…

26. Learn origami.

I’m sure there’s at least one video online that can show you how to make cranes and ... wait, what else is there besides cranes? See? All the more reason to find out.

Image via iStock.

27. Organize all your music.

Maybe you only have "Hamilton" and "Hamilton Mixtape" on repeat — all. the. time. But sometimes when you go searching for your favorite Barenaked Ladies jam, you don’t know if it’s on your phone, iPad, CD, laptop, etc. Take today and get the ball rolling on syncing up all your glorious tunes so that next time you wonder what he says after “Watching X-files with no lights on,” you can cue it up on any device you have handy.

28. Find out how to say “in the house” in French.

29. Rewatch the entire "Back to the Future" trilogy

Yes, Nike released self-tying shoes, the Cubs won, and Biff got elected, but there’s also a happy ending in there ... somewhere.

30. Days and nights at the museums.

How about getting yourself the gift of knowledge, culture, history, art, and more?

Lots of museums have Black Friday events, and while they’ll probably be crowded, they'll likely have less of a "running of the bulls" vibe as your local mall.

31. Don’t cook a single thing.

Get creative with those leftovers. Have you ever had a cranberry/stuffing/sweet potato sandwich on two slices of thick cut turkey? You’re welcome.

But instead of bread, use turkey. Trust me. Image via iStock.

32. Or bake everything.

Main course is all set (see above), but how about the heavenly smell of fresh baked bread, pecan pie, or cinnamon rolls piping through your house as you bask in your decision to not leave the house at 4:00 in the morning to fight over a toy that will be ignored two days after Christmas.

33. Update your Bucket List.

Highlights on mine include: learning to knit, going skydiving, and seeing "Hamilton." What about you?

34. Decide on the best trilogy ever and watch it. All of it. Extended editions too.

"Star Wars"? Indy? "Back to the Future"? "Qatsi"? "Before Midnight"? "Toy Story"? "Lord of the Rings"? "Matrix"? "Twilight" (kidding)?

35. Support local businesses.

Obviously you're avoiding the malls and stores with massive plastic signs, but if you head down to your local “main street” and pop into some of the local family-owned shops, chances are they’ll appreciate your patronage and you’ll be helping your community in more ways than one.

Image via iStock.

36. Bubble. Bath.

When was the last time you just dipped into soapy, bubbly hot goodness and just relaxed?

37. Unplug for a bit.

Try it for a few hours. It’ll be hard and the phantom vibrations will drive you nuts for a the first 20-30 minutes, but then ... oh, then ... you’ll feel 100% more relaxed.

38. Avoid using #blessed.

True enlightenment doesn’t require a data plan.

39. See if you can help out your parents with anything.

I wish I could still do this, so if anything, for me, give them a call, head over, and see if they need help with anything around the house. You know, if you can.  

40. Have a "Monty Python" marathon.

Because with today’s current events, it's so good to "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life."

41. Immerse yourself in "The Crown. "

Wait. You haven’t seen "The Crown"? OK. Well that’s literally your entire Black Friday right there.

Image from "The Crown"/Netflix.

42. Make sure your younger siblings still know who’s in charge.

Noogies were a great method back in the day, but simply making them do the dishes does wonders to reassert your oldest sibling status. It’s the little things.

43. Debate the merits of and rank local cuisine from around the country.

Please share this list with me (hello, I am @LACarlos on Twitter). Currently I have Chicago deep dish pizza above a Philly cheesesteak but that “wiz wit” is making a run for it.

44. Define "materialism."

Let me Google that for you.

45. Have you heard of this website called Upworthy?

If there’s one internet hole you can fall all the way down in, I suggest reading some of the stories you can find on this very website. They’re pretty damn thoughtful and all the smiles and empathy are 100% free.

46. Rank the greatest sports teams of all time.

What metric will you use? Titles? Global reach? David Ortiz? So far, I have the Yankees in second to last place, but of course, any team that appropriates native culture is at the bottom of the list as well.

47. Rewatch "The Godfather" duology.

Because there are only TWO Godfather movies that matter. (Thanks, Sophia.)

48. Follow people you admire online.

Because it would be super sketchy if you did it IRL. Stop trying to make stalking cute, Hollywood. It's not.

49. Order a pizza from a local joint.

If you can, order pizza from a mom-and-pop shop that is probably using the same recipe they’ve had in the family for 100 years instead of from a massive corporation. Eat all the history.

Image via iStock.

50. Use the internet for good.

I joke about certain hashtags, but there are so many out there that are socially conscious and helping to bring about change. Take a look: #YesAllWomen, #BlackLivesMatter, #UmbrellaRevolution, and #WhyIStayed #WhyILeft are some that have made an impact.

51. Make plans to march to the best mall ever on Jan. 21.

You know, with 1 million other women who are also marching. With signs. Justice and liberty for all has no price, after all.

52. Watch a movie and also learn about climate change.

"Before the Flood," a movie produced by Leonardo DiCaprio, Martin Scorsese, and others, is a moving documentary that helps us understand even further the steps we need to take regarding climate change.

53. Write something.

You don’t have to finish it on Friday, but have you ever had an idea for a short story? A book? A poem? An article? It usually takes some guy named Lin-Manuel six-seven years to write something, so don’t feel rushed. Sit back and jot down some ideas and see where your imagination takes you.

54. Make a baby...

You know, if you want to and are totally ready to. Otherwise, make sure you're fully protected.

55. ...or adopt a pet.

Because they are adorable, loyal, always happy, and did I mention adorable? Go to an adoption center and just try to not walk out with a new best friend.  

Image via iStock.

56. Make mulled wine.

It’s so good. (You can totally do this on Thursday as well.) But the smell and the warmth is 100% what Thanksgiving weekend should feel like.

57. Make some handmade gifts.

For example, lazy and delicious handmade vanilla extract. You’ll save money and be the coolest.

58. Get involved in your local government.

You’d be surprised how much thought goes into, “Should we put a stop sign there?” I have friends who felt the same way and a year later they've become elected neighborhood council members; they get to help make the decisions with their constituency. Research it online and make a game plan.

59. Take a hike.

No, really. Grab the friends, family, dog, boots, and bundle up and go for a hike. Who knows how much longer we’ll have these 58 glorious national parks? Might as well enjoy them now.

Image via iStock.

60. Figure out how to play this game well.

When you're done with the Monopoly debacle, try wrapping your head around Go, which is considered the hardest game in the world.  It “possesses more possibilities than the total number of atoms in the visible universe.”

61. Have a video game marathon.

Blow into those cartridges, fire up the ol' Sega Genesis, and demolish all the Sonic levels. (I am definitely not a child of the '80s.)

62. It's Black Friday, so stick to a theme: watch "Black Sails," "Black Mirror," and "Orphan Black."

Jury is still out on "Code Black" though.  

63. Write some cards.

Don’t print them out. Don’t use a template. Go old school here. Jot down some thank-you notes, some well wishes, or even some holiday cheer. Oh, and you have to make sure you send them. So buy stamps.

64. Watch the best coach in sports lose to my home team.

The National Basketball Association seems to be the league having the right kinds of conversations. Gregg Popovich is what all coaches should be. The Boston Celtics are rebuilding. It’s an early game so enjoy it and maybe we’ll have a miracle. There are also plenty of other entertaining games from one of the best sports league in America.

65. Clear the air with your family after awkward election conversations.

So you had some awkward conversations about politics with your relatives. First, take a breather and regroup. But then, if you're up for it, the day after is a good time to revisit why they feel a certain way and what can be done to unite as a whole, starting with your family. If they’re OK with having some respectful dialogue, give it a whirl. If not, remember you probably only need to see them a few times a year.

66. OK, so if you must shop:

See if you can find some gifts that give back, that are socially conscious, that do more than just pick up dust in your random stuff closet.

Image via iStock.

67. Turn your leftovers into a Frankenstein meal.

Have you ever had a turkey/stuffing/cranberry pie made from scratch? Have you ever made potato pancakes on the griddle using just mashed potatoes from the vat from last night? You’re welcome.

68. Marathon some Broadway show tunes and try to sing along.

I’m 100% serious here.

69. Branch out from Broadway. Try local theater.

When’s the last time you went to your local theater? Escapism a wonderful thing, so look up what’s happening in your regional theaters. I bet there are no fewer than 50 "Godspell," "Oklahoma!," "Fiddler on the Roof," and "Hello, Dolly!" productions happening right now. Even better? You’ll be supporting local artists and community organizations.

70. Laugh.

There are countless improv troupes, stand-up comedians, and other people who tell jokes in exchange for money out there. Find a local comedy club or comedy show, grab a table, and get ready to laugh uncontrollably.

71. Throw a cuddle party.

Significant other? Puppy? Teddy bear? Comforter? Oversized pillow? Find the position where everything is just perfect, put your phone on mute, and spend a couple hours just dozing with your favorite cuddle buddy.

72. Go all-in on some sweet, sweet nap time.

See 71 above. More of a solo cuddle party kind of person? That’s totally fine because this way no one can judge you for your deafening snoring. The struggle is real.

73. Watch movies about the dystopian future.

Just in case you might actually need those survival skills soon.

74. Donate your old clothes.

Clean out your closet. Get rid of the clothes you don't wear anymore or don't want and find them a better home. Goodwill takes a variety of donations, but did you know there are organizations that specifically accept donated business clothes? Don’t want that old suit? Donate it! It can actually help someone get a job.

75. Paint things every color.

Finger? Watercolor? Spin art? Bob Ross? Your old room? Plan new colors for the new year.

76. Do something you think is childish.

Eat something with your hands. Go play in a pile of leaves. Eat mac and cheese with hot dogs. Draw on the walls. Spin around until you fall over. Watch a Disney movie.

You’ll smile.

77.  Appreciate ... something.

You don’t actually have to do anything today. You could just sit back and appreciate that you have all these options, and more importantly, that you are, hopefully, lucky enough to share them with family, friends, and more.

Image via iStock.

Black Friday doesn't have to be a soul-sucking, manic corporate nightmare if you don't want it to be.

If you love shopping on Black Friday? Sure, go for it. If you need to shop on Black Friday? Do it.  

But you don't have to shop just because everyone else is.

Shopping on Black Friday not only means being away from your family, it also means thousands of workers across the country will be away from theirs, likely working long hours and extended shifts. So if you can, just say "no" to Black Friday shopping, and pick one or two or three of the items on this list to spend your day enjoying instead.

Joy

People from around the globe share 15 signs that someone is obviously an American

"An Italian told me that Americans walk confidently in the wrong direction."

tourists, american tourists, us tourists, vacation, american style

Americans on vacation.

One of the fun things about traveling to different countries is that you not only get to learn about other cultures, but you also learn some things about your own. Americans who travel abroad often learn that people around the world appreciate them for being open, friendly, and good at spreading hope and optimism.

On the other hand, people in other countries can often tell when an American is coming from a mile away because they speak loudly, whether indoors or outdoors. Americans also have a very peculiar body language and are known to lean on things when they have to stand for an extended period.



A Reddit user posed a question in the AskReddit subforum to learn more about how Americans stand out abroad: What's an "obvious" sign that someone is American? The post received more than 35,000 responses, with an overwhelming number of commenters noting that Americans are all smiles and love to make small talk, something most people appreciate.

According to Redditors, here are 15 "obvious" signs that someone is American:

1. They have a unique confidence

"An Italian told me that Americans walk confidently in the wrong direction."

"Been taught to walk fast, and look worried.. People think you know what you're doing."

2. They're friendly

"I worked as a cashier in a tourist place in Paris, I always recognised Americans because they were kinda friendly to me and they always left tips."

"I guess there are worse things than friendly and generous."


3. Time = distance

"If someone asks how far away something is, an American will tell how you long it takes to get there as opposed to a physical distance."

"It actually pisses off some Americans to give a distance in miles, unless they're calculating gas mileage. In some places, you have to give with and without traffic options. I think it's more valuable info in time than in distance."

4. Grinning at strangers

"The gentle grins you give to strangers if you make eye contact with them as you pass by, at least in the Midwest. was not well received in Germany."

"I dated a European man here in the US. When we walked together, every time I made eye contact with someone on our path I would smile at them, and they would always smile back. Boyfriend was so confused at all these strangers smiling at me. Kept asking if I knew all these people. It was hilarious."


5. They like personal space

"How much personal space they give themselves. Americans like at LEAST an arm's length."

"We're conditioned to fill spaces evenly. I noticed when i worked delivery, spending lots of quality time on elevators that for every new person that enters, everybody shuffles to even things out. Similar thing plays out in social gatherings and bars. Not sure if that's universal or not, but I find it interesting. I think the size of our personal bubbles is because our spaces are generally much larger because we've got the space (heh) to build bigger buildings, sidewalks, roads etc. Might also explain why we're louder. Used to filling larger spaces with volume."

Body language expert Joe Navarro says that among Americans, the social zone for acquaintances and casual interactions is four to 12 feet, while family and close friends stand 1.5 to four feet apart. The intimate zone, for those closest to us, ranges from the skin to about 18 inches.


6. They lean

"According to the CIA, when training to be a spy, you have to unlearn how to lean. Americans tend to lean on things when standing still."

All of this is true, according to Jonna Mendez, the former chief of disguise at the CIA, who has shared some of her tips and tricks for making Americans seem more European. "So we would de-Americanize you," Mendez told NPR. "They think that we are slouchy, a little sloppy. And they think that they can almost see that in our demeanor on the street because they stand up straight. They don't lean on things."


7. They don't have an indoor voice

"I've lived in America for 25 years, and it still irritates me that instead of lowering their voices in restaurants so everyone can hear, Americans just scream over each other and make their restaurants as loud as clubs."

"For some reason, my otherwise smart and wonderful American friends will speak in the same volume, diction, and speed regardless of any outside factor unless specifically asked."

8. Dessert for breakfast

"In my homestay in London, I was told that I was 'so American' for enjoying a piece of cake for breakfast (not frosted cake, but like a nuts and dried fruit spiced coffeecake kind of thing). Apparently, that's exclusively for like a 4 pm snack, and breakfast is more of a savory meal."

"A lot of American breakfast items in my mind are desserts (pancakes, muffins, waffles, etc.). It doesn't mean I won't eat them, but it's kinda weird to do so."

9. They wear their clothes differently

"A British man once told me he knew I was American because I was wearing a baseball cap backwards."

"An Italian told me they could tell I was American because I wore my sunglasses on the top of my head when I wasn't using them."


10. Exposed soles

"While visiting Turkey, I was told that I looked American because I was sitting with one leg across the other, and the bottom of my shoe was exposed. Apparently, it's rude idk."

"In a lot of places outside of the US, showing the bottom of your shoe is rude."

11. Tactical gear

"Tactical sunglasses."

"I'm in the US, and virtually anything marketed towards men has the word 'tactical' in front of it."

12. They love small talk

"I'm from California (though a smallish town), and we wave to neighbors on our road, even if we haven't met, and start conversations in the grocery line with people if the opportunity presents itself. Also, smiling and saying hello to someone you happen to walk by and make eye contact with is quite normal. We are a social species, it would be so weird not to be friendly, even to strangers, for me, and I'm not even that social of a person."

"What really gets me to it is not that Americans do small talk constantly, but the fact that they are so good and fast at it. I mean, I say 'yeah, it's hot,' and they reply with some interesting fact or make a connection to their hometown. I feel less of myself after this. They must have some small talk class in school or some sh*t."

13. They like to point

"I've always observed my US friends like to point at stuff while walking and say what it is…. We were out walking around Amsterdam recently and they were like 'hey look it's a smoke shop'…. 'Oh look a sex shop'…. 'Oh hey, it's a prostitute' …. 'Look at the canal'…. 'Wow it's another prostitute'….. 'another canal' etc etc. It was like watching Netflix with Audio Descriptions turned on."

"You know that little voice inside your head, your internal monologue? Americans seem to monologue their thoughts."


14. Optimism and enthusiasm

"Dunno in all context, but Americans in Europe stand out with their ceaseless optimism and enthusiasm."

"I'm reminded a lot of Ted Lasso. Everyone I know (all Americans) loves the show. I wonder what kind of European fan base it has."

"Americans are so positive and have such a thirst for life. It sickens me."

15. They eat while walking

"When I lived in Europe, people said only Americans eat while walking. I'd be eating a bagel or something on the way to work or class, and multiple people asked if I was American lol."

"Jay Leno said on Top Gear, I think it was, that Americans are also the only people who eat while driving. I don't do this, but I constantly see people who do, haha, especially in LA, where people spend a lot of time in their cars."

Health

11 people share the 'harsh truths' that helped them become far more emotionally mature

"How people treat me is not my fault, but I am responsible for what I tolerate."

upset woman, hurt people, discussion, argument, heartache
via Pexels

A woman listens to a harsh truth.

It can be heartbreaking to realize that someone you love can't live up to your expectations. It can be even harder to look back at choices you’ve made in life and know you could have been kinder or put more effort into things that really mattered.

However, when we bravely face the hard truths we have to learn in life, we become emotionally stronger. The struggle may be painful at the time, but as the saying goes, “We are stronger in the places where we’ve been broken.” On the other side of the emotional Rubicon is healing, wisdom, and strength.


A poster in Reddit’s emotional intelligence subforum asked users a very personal question that got to the heart of how they became stronger people: “What’s a harsh truth you had to accept to become emotionally mature?” The responses showed the power of taking personal responsibility and seeing yourself and others with rigorous honesty.

upset woman, woman driving, crying in car, honesty, realization An upset woman sits in her car.via Canva/Photos

The discussion is a wonderful reminder of the gold that we can find on the other side of heartache and loss. Here are 11 of the best harsh truths people had to accept to become emotionally mature.

1. Bad parents aren't an excuse

"Having sh*tty parents is not an excuse to be a sh*tty adult. At a certain point, it's on you to do the work and break the cycle."

2. Nobody owes you anything, nobody is coming to save you

"That's right, if you want change, start a revolution yourself."

"Or, as my therapist put it, 'the cavalry is not coming. It's on you.'"

3. You never truly know what anyone is thinking

"You will never really know what people are thinking. They will say what they think people want to hear or avoid the truth. You truly have to trust yourself and work with yourself. Identify what you’re thinking and feeling, and then work with it. And there are no answers. Some things will always be a mystery and never solved."

Psychologists call this phenomenon the Theory of Mind, which holds that we can understand and interpret others' beliefs, thoughts, and feelings to read social situations. However, even though we may come close to understanding other people's inner states, we can never be 100% sure.

upset man, sad man, man in his 30s, man by ocean, anxiety, depression An upset man grabs his head.via Canva/Photos

4. You can mean well and still hurt people

"Two things can exist at once! You can mean well and absolutely hurt someone’s feelings. You arent above accidentally upsetting someone."

"This one is huge to me lately. I had to break up with someone who I do love, but I can't be with anymore. He refused to believe I ever loved him if I was hurting him, I said two things can be true at the same time!"

5. Beware of takers

"Lots of folks are takers, and if you are a giver and don’t know this, they will drain you dry."

"My mum always categorises people by 'radiators' and 'drains.'"

6. Watch where you place your self-worth

"If you tie your self-worth to another person, you are giving them power to take your self-worth out the door with them if they leave. That's not a power you want to give them, and I highly doubt they would want that either."

7. People hear what they want to hear

"Feel what they want to feel, do what they want to do, say what they want to say... all we are control of is our boundaries and what we do with how we feel."

upset woman, woman at computer, calculator, stress, anxiety A stressed-out woman.via Canva/Photos

8. Radical accountability

"Radical accountability is often not fun but will completely transform your capacity, integrity, self-trust, potential for growth, etc."

David Goggins, a motivational speaker and former Navy SEAL, is known for championing the power of radical accountability. Here, he shares how he created an accountability mirror. Every day, he wrote a mistake on a Post-it note and attached it to his mirror. He then methodically worked on fixing each misstep.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

9. Being honest about motivations

"Being able to take responsibility for my actions means considering all of the harm I’ve caused and being able to look at my motivations honestly. It’s really hard to do that because the shame can be so strong, but it’s honestly really healing to be able to face yourself like that."

10. You're responsible for what you tolerate

"How people treat me is not my fault, but I am responsible for what I tolerate. I really didn't want to have to be accountable for myself for a very long time. It was simply easier to blame anyone and anything outside of myself for what happened to me. But I must admit that my life transformed once I started taking responsibility. Many people don't want to admit that they play their part in what happens to them (bar if they're a child, obviously - and very serious cases of abuse and violence). And I was one of them."

11. Some people will never reach emotional maturity

"That the people you love deeply and dearly may never become emotionally mature themselves. They may still try to defend and protect themselves even when all you wanted to do was be seen or heard. Taking it personally when you just want a resolution. It's realizing their limits are so much smaller than yours. What it so simple for you to do, even things like taking accountability for your actions, seems like a fkn mountain for them that they aren't willing to start climbing."

john waite, police, cops, rock stars, musicians
Photo credit: Kiowa County Sheriff’s Office via Facebook, cropped

Kansas police pulled over an '80s pop star, and it led to a wholesome moment.

Being pulled over by the police is always nerve-racking, and it's probably even more awkward when the driver is a pop star with multiple chart-topping singles. In July 2025, one such encounter went viral after sheriff's deputies in Kiowa County, Kansas, stopped a vehicle transporting British '80s hitmaker John Waite. But instead of leading to tension, the traffic stop resulted in a genuinely wholesome moment.

Waite and his band were en route to their concert at United Wireless Arena in Dodge City when they were pulled over for speeding. Sergeant Justin Rugg just happened to be a longtime fan. "I'm not even on cloud nine; I'm on like cloud 12," he said after making the stop, according to the Kiowa County Sheriff Office's Facebook page. The post continued: "It's not every day our Deputies get to pull over cool guys!!"


Everyone was a good sport about the whole thing. Waite took a photo with the officer and even had his band pose for another, leaning over the hood of the patrol car and looking back at the camera in mock confusion. The band eventually made it to the show, and both Waite and the sheriff's office shared the photos. The KCSO wrote to Waite, "Have a rockin' time and check out that beautiful Kansas sky!" On his own account, the musician added, "Pulled over for speeding. Good guy cop!"

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"The next thing I know, I'm taking photographs with him, and we're almost wrestling"

Neither the report nor the social media posts officially say whether Waite's crew received a speeding ticket, but given the cordial tone of the photo session, it seems likely they were let off with a warning.

The comment sections are full of solid jokes and observations, including this one: "Excuse was he didn't want to be late for a show. He got off with a verbal. I'm going to have to try that next time." A commenter whose profile lists their occupation as a 911 dispatcher with the Kiowa County Sheriff's Office wrote: "I was just excited to dispatch on this call lol!! Freaking AMAZING!!!!! Hey, John Waite, stop in here on your way back!! It's my weekend to work so I didn't get to see you!!!!"

Months later, Waite laughed about the viral encounter during an interview with the YouTube channel AccordingToAmabile.

"[The officer] says, 'Who are you?'" he recalled. "I'm going, 'John Waite.' He says, 'John Waite!' And the next thing I know, I'm taking photographs with him, and we're almost wrestling. Everybody's cracking up and laughing. He was a great guy! That night, I look out in the audience, and he's raging, jumping up and down about four rows back! You meet some fantastic people [as a musician]. You really do. And a lot of it's very funny."

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You've probably heard Waite's '80s hits

While many people admitted they don't recognize the singer's name, it's likely they've heard at least a few of his songs.

Waite's first prominent gig came in the late '70s as the frontman and bassist of the hard rock–power pop band The Babys, best known for minor hits like "Isn't It Time" and "Every Time I Think of You." The group, which briefly included Journey keyboardist Jonathan Cain, broke up in 1981, and Waite launched a solo career the following year with his debut LP, Ignition. He enjoyed a long run of commercial success in the decade, landing 10 singles on the Billboard Hot 100, including his ultra-smooth 1984 No. 1 hit "Missing You." (If you haven't seen the music video, do yourself a favor. It's 1984 in visual form. Classic stuff.)

In between his various solo projects and tours, Waite had another breakthrough moment. In 1988, he co-founded the supergroup Bad English, which scored a No. 1 hit the following year with the sleek ballad "When I See You Smile." No wonder Sergeant Rugg was so impressed.

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David Bowie; MTV; MTV ending; David Bowie interview; diversity; music videos

1983 interview shows David Bowie calling out MTV for questionable treatment of Black musicians

With MTV winding down to an end, old interviews are resurfacing online. Recently, an interview featuring the iconic singer, David Bowie, resurfaced showing the late musician essentially taking over the interview in the most respectful way. Bowie exuded kindness and compassion while simultaneously and vigorously advocating for others.

In the clip from a1983 episode of MTV News, the singer is being interviewed by Mark Goodman. It starts seemingly after the interview has been going on for a while. Bowie directly asks Goodman if he might be able to ask him a question. The reporter quickly agrees, not knowing the weight of the question that would soon follow, but Bowie wasted no time getting to the point. As a longtime advocate, he saw a disparity and took the opportunity to ask the source directly.


"I'd like to ask you something," Bowie says while fiddling with his sock, perhaps out of nervous anticipation. "It occurred to me, having watched MTV over the last few months, it's a solid enterprise, and it's going a lot going for it. I'm just floored by the fact that there are so many bl...so few Black artists featured on it. Why is that?"

David Bowie; MTV; MTV ending; David Bowie interview; diversity; music videos David Bowie on swing in red suitElmar J. Lordemann/Wikimedia Commons

He finishes stumbling through his initial question, still picking at his sock, and makes direct eye contact with Goodman. The reporter attempts to explain that the network is trying to move in the direction of playing more Black artists, but is currently focused on "narrow casting." This answer wasn't enough for Bowie to move on. The late singer had several follow-up questions, which turned the interviewer into the interviewee.

"It's evident in the fact that the only few Black artists that one does see are on about two-thirty in the morning until about six," Bowie says matter-of-factly. "Very few are featured predominantly, predominantly during the day." Goodman attempted to interject before the recording artist interrupted to say that, over the last couple of weeks, he had noticed a change but called it a slow process. The reporter attempted to explain away the noticeable lack of diversity in the music videos shown during daytime hours by saying people like Bowie were not watching the channel long enough. But Bowie challenged the deflective answer as he dug for the truth.

David Bowie; MTV; MTV ending; David Bowie interview; diversity; music videos David Bowie album coverPiano, Piano!/Flickr

"Because one sees a lot on the...on the...there's one Black station on television that I keep picking up, and I'm not sure which station it's on. But there seems to be a lot of Black artists making very good videos that I'm surprised aren't used on MTV," Bowie counters.

Goodman then shifts gears a bit, explaining that they're trying to make sure MTV reaches a broad audience, including suburban families. " Oh, of course, also we have to do what we think, not only New York or Los Angeles will appreciate, but also Poughkeepsie or Midwest, pick some town in the Midwest, it will be scared to death by Prince, which we're playing, or a string of other Black faces," the reporter says.

David Bowie; MTV; MTV ending; David Bowie interview; diversity; music videos PrinceWorld's Direction/Flickr

Interestingly, Prince is from Minnesota, which is about as gosh-darned Midwest as a person could get. Yet the late chart-topping artist was the first name listed as being scary to Midwestern suburban moms. David Bowie, still not impressed, simply replies, "Very interesting."

With Bowie delicately placed in the middle of what was likely a highly anticipated interview at the time, Goodman was clearly scrambling and proceeded to only make things worse: the MTV News host shares that once white artists pick up the musical styles and trends of Black music, taking it on as their own, then it will be more acceptable to be seen on the music network. This response came after Bowie asked the host if he felt the stations, including radio stations, had a responsibility to make the process fairer and more integrated.

"Absolutely," Goodman says. "I think it's happening because white music and white musicians are now starting to play more than ever what...more than they have lately. Let's say in the past 10 years, what Black artists have been into, and now, hopefully, the lines are going to start to blur, and when we play a band like ABC, well, there's white and Black kids there enjoying it, and all of a sudden it's a little bit easier for a white kid to understand it."

Goodman goes on to share about a letter he read in a magazine called The Record, where the writer was ranting about the things he didn't want to see on MTV (i.e., Black artists, we can assume). The former Labyrinth star replies to this revelation by stating plainly, "Well, that's his problem."

Even by today's standards, a recording artist openly addressing any lack of diversity in the media is rare. Bowie addressing the inequity during an interview in 1983 was truly groundbreaking.

6 7, 6 7 meaning, group 7, group 7 meaning, slang, gen x parenting, millennial parenting
via @bryaninmsp/Instagram, used with permission. And Hyacinthe Rigaud/Wikipedia

Suddenly "6 7" isn't so aggravating. It's revolutionary!

Hate the "6 7" meme, but love history? You're in for a treat. Real estate agent and all-around funny guy Bryan Clapper may have just saved all of us old-timers from the dreaded tyranny of brain-rot Gen Z slang by, somehow, making it clever.

In a funny Instagram clip styled like an old-school "The More You Know" PSA, Clapper offers to "translate" Gen Z slang for Gen X or Millennial parents who may feel "confused" when their kids use it.


Clapper playfully argues that, rather than brain-rot gobbledygook, it's a reference to the date of June 7th, 1654, which, "as we all remember from our 400-level French history courses in college," marked the coronation of King Louis XIV. Yeah, that's pretty much common knowledge. Right?

6 7, 6 7 meaning, group 7, group 7 meaning, slang, gen x parenting, millennial parenting We really wish this were true. via @bryaninmsp/Instagram, used with permission.

So when your teenager says "6 7," what they're really saying is:

"I disagree with the colonial expansion of the French empire and the perceived divine right of kings, but acknowledge its role in creating the conditions that led to the French Revolution and the model for modern democracy that the United States is built on," Clapper says.

Therefore, the best response parents can use to sound cool is "Vive la France!" Truly, any excuse to shout this is welcome.

On the other hand, "Group 7," another bit of youth lingo, has nothing to do with the French Revolution, and everything to do with the 1920s, apparently. As Clapper jokingly explains, the term refers to the famed Canadian landscape painters known as the Group of Seven, founded by Lawren Harris, J. E. H. MacDonald, A. Y. Jackson, Arthur Lismer, Frederick Varley, Franklin Carmichael, and Frank Johnston.

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"Anyway, the hip kids love Group 7 because of their efforts to create a truly Canadian style of painting, rooted in deep respect for and connection with nature," Clapper says. Sure, yeah, that's it.

Neither slang phrase has anything to do with Clapper's explanations. "6 7" is intentionally nonsensical. "Group 7" carries a little more meaning, often signaling superiority or eliteness, but it also emerged out of nowhere and spread because of the internet.

But it's much more fun to step into Clapper's reality, isn't it? It certainly stoked the creative fires of other history buffs in the comments:

"Sorry you have misunderstood...6,7 refers to the historic Argentinian colony vote to adopt the crop rotation program for olive farmers in 1906. It was the first breakthrough for environmentally-minded produce pioneers. A historic victory for planet lovers and virtue signalers. And now that you know this, you should respond 'Ohhh-I-live that'. Sounds a little like 'olive that'!!...get it?"

"As a Latin teacher I feel like they're talking about Servius Tullius and Tarquinius Superbus, the sixth and seventh kings of Rome, after whom the Monarchy was replaced by the Republic. It's a commentary on the problems with one person having too much power. Such clever children!"

"I thought they were quoting Chaucer 'to set the world on six and seven' or Shakespeare 'But time will not permit: all is uneven, And everything is left at six and seven.'"

And many parents were thrilled to finally have the perfect comeback for the next time they hear the dreaded "6 7" term:

"I will now scream 'Viva la France' at my teenage kids incessantly. Thank you!"

"Irritating my teenager with 6-7 just got levelled up! Viva la France!"

It seems that in the war of words, the old fogies finally have the upper hand once again.