+
upworthy
More

The moving way these women got their parents to meet them halfway on marriage.

The moving way these women got their parents to meet them halfway on marriage.
True
SK-II

What do you do when your family expects you to get married but you just aren’t ready?

Women around the world continue to face this question as gender roles and expectations morph from generation to generation. In China, marriage expectation runs deep, which in turn often creates a divide between millennials and their parents. According to their parents, women are supposed to find a husband while they are young.  Meanwhile, the independence and ambition of modern young women are often criticized rather than praised.

All photos via SK-II.


But the world is changing fast. Many young Chinese women either aren’t ready for marriage or don’t feel the need to conform to the cultural expectations attached to it.  Marriage rates in China have plummeted. The average age for women in China to marry has increased from age 20 in the 1950s to approximately age 27 today—and that reality is causing a rift between generations. Women who love and respect their parents find themselves struggling to communicate their desire to hold off on marriage without being outright defiant thereby damaging their family relationships.

SK-II is helping young Chinese women and their parents bridge this gap with their #ChangeDestiny campaign.

The global prestige skincare brand wants to help women take their destiny into their own hands while also preserving and protecting their relationship with their parents. One way their doing that is by showcasing the story of three single Chinese women in their new documentary film, "Meet Me Halfway."

These women have spent years avoiding going home for Chinese New Year due to marriage pressure they'd experience from their families. In the film, each one takes the first daunting step to reach out to her parents so they can break down the barriers that have kept them apart and start building a bridge of understanding.

These women and their parents in the film aren’t actors. We see their struggles and real emotions as they begin the hard conversations they’ve been avoiding for years. The three women’s circumstances may be unique, but the gap they feel between them and their parents is the same. And with 8 out of 10 single Chinese women saying they hesitate to go home for Chinese New Year due to similar marriage pressure, they're far from alone.

“We want to tell women worldwide—destiny can change, when you have the courage to take the first step to meet halfway,” shares Sandeep Seth, Vice President of Global SK-II. “We hope the stories of these three brave women can inspire other women to take the first step, start a conversation with their families about marriage pressure and in the process, empower them to live life on their own terms and shape their own destinies.”

It takes effort and courage to change tradition, but these women’s stories show us that it doesn’t have to ruin relationships. In fact, it can strengthen them tenfold.

Duan Yu Li was excited to introduce her parents to her boyfriend last Chinese New Year, and had planned to bring him home for Chinese New Year last year. Unfortunately, her parents couldn’t accept that she was dating someone who wasn’t Chinese, and the whole trip got cancelled. Duan Yu Li wants her parents to be proud of her and her successful career, but she feels like they can’t connect because of their expectations for her to marry someone within her culture.

Yang Yang lives in Shanghai, but her parents keep pressuring her to come back to her hometown of Wengzhou to get married and settle down. "Women shouldn't work so hard," says Yang Yang’s father. Her mother adds, "It’s exhausting for a girl." Yang Yang says she feels indebted to her parents, but wants them to see her as an adult who can make her own decisions.

Lin Yan’s was raised by a strong, independent mother, and she has taken after her. A radio DJ, Lin Yan wants to focus on her career, but her mother is constantly trying to set her up with a man. She doesn’t always answer her mother’s phone calls because she feels so much pressure from her, which makes her feel guilty and widens the emotional gap between them.

Each woman wrote a handwritten letter to her parents inviting them to meet her in a neutral location, and we get to witness their moving reunions in the film. Through tearful hugs and hopeful words, these daughters and parents are beginning the process of mending their relationships and coming to a place of mutual understanding.

Hopefully, these real-life reconnections will inspire more families to take those fateful first steps to bridging this generational gap and find the middle ground together.

Watch these poignant stories unfold here:

Health

4 simple hacks to help you meet your healthy eating goals

Trying to eat healthier? Try these 4 totally doable tricks.

Photo by Anna Pelzer on Unsplash

Most of us want to eat healthier but need some help to make it happen.

True

When it comes to choosing what to eat, we live in a uniquely challenging era. Never before have humans known more about nutrition and how to eat for optimal health, and yet we’ve never been more surrounded by distractions and temptations that derail us from making healthy choices.

Some people might be able to decide “I’m going to eat healthier!” and do so without any problem, but those folks are unicorns. Most of us know what we should do, but need a little help making it happen—like some simple hacks, tips and tricks for avoiding pitfalls on the road to healthier eating.

While recognizing that what works for one person may not work for another, here are some helpful habits and approaches that might help you move closer to your healthy eating goals.

man pulling chip out of a chip bagOur mouths loves chips. Our bodies not so much.Photo by Bermix Studio on Unsplash

Goal: Snack on less junk food

Tip: Focus your willpower on the grocery store, not your home

Willpower is a limited commodity for most of us, and it is no match for a bag of potato chips sitting on top of the fridge. It’s just a fact. Channeling your willpower at the grocery store can save you from having to fight that battle at home. If you don’t bring chips into your house in the first place, you’ll find it a lot easier to reach for something healthier.

The key to successful shopping trips is to always go to the store with a specific list and a full stomach—you’ll feel much less tempted to buy the junky snack foods if you’re already satiated. Also, finding healthier alternatives that will still satisfy your cravings for salty or crunchy, or fatty foods helps. Sugar snap peas have a surprisingly satisfying crunch, apples and nut butter hit that sweet-and-salty craving, etc.

slice of cakeYou can eat well without giving up sweets completely.Photo by Caitlyn de Wild on Unsplash

Goal: Eat less sugar

Tip: Instead of “deprive,” think “delay” or “decrease and delight”

Sugar is a tricky one. Some people find it easier to cut out added sugars altogether, but that can create an all-or-nothing mindset that all too often results in “all.” Eating more whole foods and less processed foods can help us cut out a lot of ancillary sugar, but we still live in a world with birthday cakes and dessert courses.

One approach to dessert temptation is to delay instead of deprive. Tell yourself you can have any sweet you want…tomorrow. This mental trick flips the “I’ll just indulge today and start eating healthier tomorrow” idea on its head. It’s a lot easier to resist something you know you can have tomorrow than to say no to something you think you’ll never get to have again.

Another approach when you really want to enjoy a dessert at that moment is to decrease the amount and really truly savor it. Eat each bite slowly, delighting in the full taste and satisfaction of it. As soon as that delight starts to diminish, even a little, stop eating. You’ve gotten what you wanted out of it. You don’t have to finish it. (After all, you can always have more tomorrow!)

colorful fresh food on a plateA naturally colorful meal is a healthy meal.Photo by Anna Pelzer on Unsplash

Goal: Eat healthier meals

Tip: Focus on fresh foods and plan meals ahead of time

Meal planning is easier than ever before. The internet is filled with countless tools—everything from recipes to shopping lists to meal planning apps—and it’s as awesome as it is overwhelming.

Planning ahead takes the guesswork and decision fatigue out of cooking, preventing the inevitable “Let’s just order a pizza.” You can have a repeating 3-week or 4-week menu of your favorite meals so you never have to think about what you’re going to eat, or you can meal plan once a week to try new recipes and keep things fresh.

It might help to designate one day a week to “shop and chop”—getting and prepping the ingredients for the week’s meals so they’re ready to go in your fridge or freezer.

woman holding blueberries in her handsOrganic foods are better for the Earth and for us.Photo by andrew welch on Unsplash

Goal: Eat more organic/humanely raised food

Tip: Utilize the “dirty dozen” and “clean 15” lists to prioritize

Many people choose organic because they want to avoid pesticides and other potentially harmful chemicals. Organic food is also better for the planet, and according to the Mayo Clinic, studies have shown that organic produce is higher in certain nutrients.

Most people don’t buy everything organic, but there are some foods that should take priority over others. Each year, researchers from the Environmental Working Group (EWG) analyze thousands of samples of dozens of fruits and vegetables. From this data, they create a list of the “Dirty Dozen” and “Clean 15” fruits and vegetables, indicating what produce has the most and least pesticide residue. These lists give people a good place to start focusing their transition to more organic foods.

To make organic eating even simpler, you can shop O Organics® at your local Albertsons or Safeway stores. The O Organics brand offers a wide range of affordable USDA-certified organic products in every aisle. If you’re focusing on fresh foods, O Organics produce is always grown without synthetic pesticides, is farmed to conserve biodiversity, and is always non-GMO. All animal-based O Organics products are certified humane as well. Even switching part of your grocery list to organic can make a positive impact on the planet and the people you feed.

Healthy eating habits don’t have to be all or nothing, and they don’t have to be complicated. A few simple mindset changes at home and habit changes at the grocery store can make a big difference.

Angelina Jordan blew everyone away with her version of 'Bohemian Rhapsody."

At Upworthy, we've shared a lot of memorable "America's Got Talent" auditions, from physics-defying dance performances to jaw-dropping magic acts to heart-wrenching singer-songwriter stories. Now we're adding Angelina Jordan's "AGT: The Champions" audition to the list because wow.

Jordan came to "AGT: The Champions" in 2020 as the winner of Norway's Got Talent, which she won in 2014 at the mere age of 7 with her impressive ability to seemingly channel Billie Holiday. For the 2020 audition, she sang Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody," but a version that no one had ever heard before.

With just her Amy Winehouse-ish voice, a guitar and a piano, Jordan brought the fan-favorite Queen anthem down to a smooth, melancholy ballad that's simply riveting to listen to.

Keep ReadingShow less
Family

Woman who was pressured to quit her job to raise stepdaughter's baby makes a bold decision

This sparked an important conversation about family responsibility.

via Pixabay

A middle-aged woman holding a baby.

A story that recently went viral on Reddit’s AITA forum asks an important question: What is a parent’s role in taking care of their grandchildren? The story is even further complicated because the woman at the center of the controversy is a stepparent.

The woman, 38, met her husband Sam, 47, ten years ago, when his daughter, Leah, 25, was 15. Five years ago, the couple got married after Leah had moved out to go to college.

Leah’s mom passed away when she was 10.

Last year, Leah became pregnant, and she wanted to keep the baby, but her boyfriend didn’t. After the disagreement, the boyfriend broke up with her. This forced Leah to move back home because she couldn’t afford to be a single parent and live alone on a teacher’s salary.

Keep ReadingShow less

Around 1 a.m. on April 24, semi-truck drivers in the Oak Park area of Michigan received a distress call from area police: An unidentified man was standing on the edge of a local bridge, apparently ready to jump onto the freeway below.

Those drivers then did something amazing. They raced to the scene to help — and lined up their trucks under the bridge, providing a relatively safe landing space should the man jump.

Keep ReadingShow less

Dan Vasc sings "Amazing Grace" with a heavy metal twist.

"Amazing Grace" may just be the world's most beloved and recognizable hymn, with people from all faith traditions and walks of life finding meaning and comfort in its lyrics. It was written in 1772 by John Newton, a former slave trader, after a near-fatal shipwreck caused him to reevaluate his life, convert to Christianity and become a devoted abolitionist.

Newton's spiritual has been sung by countless people in countless renditions, but there's a good chance you've never seen it sung quite like this.

Heavy metal singer Dan Vasc recorded a solo rendition of "Amazing Grace" and shared it on his YouTube channel, where it has received over 7 million views. If you're thinking that the grungy, high-pitched scream-singing that marks metal music is a strange match for a traditional Christian hymn, you could be right. But give Vasc's version a listen before passing judgment because he might just change your mind.

Keep ReadingShow less
@lovefranceschiee/TikTok

No one would say no to an easier pregnancy

Is there a perfect time of year to get pregnant? One that avoids having to skip even looking at holiday foods for fear of stirring up morning sickness? That offers a stress-free wardrobe transition? Makes swollen feet, frequent urges to pee, and relentless heartburn somehow more bearable?

According to one mom—the answer is yes.

In fact, this month not only makes pregnancy a cakewalk, it even gives parents a kid with the best astrological sign, if you’re into that sort of thing.
Keep ReadingShow less
Joy

Woman's explanation of 'girl math' has some scratching their heads while others nod along

In so many ways it makes a lot of sense...if you don't think about how nonsensical it is.

Woman's explanation of 'girl math' has some people confused

If you've been on any social media platform lately then you've likely heard about the different types of math. No not the one that makes 80s babies cry (otherwise known as common core), but the silly "math" like "boy math" or "girl math." Each explanation more ridiculous than the next while some take on a more serious tone, it's the silly ones that keep people wanting more.

Kelley Lorraine posted a video of her sitting in the car with her husband as she tries to explain "girl math" to him. It didn't take long for him to express confusion, many times interjecting with questions and audible noises of disproval. What was interesting to me was that everything she said made perfect sense...as long as you don't think about it too much.

Kelley's version of "girl math" had to be one of the most oxymoronic-nonsensical-logical reasoning that's ever been explained for this "math" challenge.

Keep ReadingShow less