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“A balm for the soul”
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Family

Teens live in a social media world that most grown-ups know almost nothing about.

Being connected to your friends all day is fun. Just don't take it too seriously.

The social life of a teen is as virtual as it is physical.

Teenagers have been glued to their phones for decades. Of course, a phone used to be for talking with friends for countless hours.

These days, talking's the least of what a phone is for.

It's all about the exciting forms of connection the Internet offers. "Social media," "social networking" — the key word is "social." And most teens are fanatically social.

Of course, there are horror stories.

With online bullying and other forms of predators, parents can easily be overwhelmed by their kids' online ambitions. Site age limits? Whatever. Kids fudge their ages and stories, and the peer pressure to join in or be left out is intense.

Parents wonder if kids understand the dangers.

Parents may know Facebook, and they might know about Twitter, Snapchat, and Instagram, but how it all folds together for a teen is something they can really only imagine. Parents are left with the choice of terrifying their child with how bad the world can be or just trying to remain as vigilant as possible.

Lots of parents end up just praying their kids have some common sense.

Dr. Gregory Dillon got together with some teens to talk about their strategies for dealing with the anxieties of online life.

"When you go digital, you're basically amplifying yourself way out. And so the question is how much can you handle." — Dr. Gregory Dillon

On the one hand, by interacting with a larger audience, you might get more approval than you're used to in the physical world. But, on the other hand, you also stand to be rejected on a much larger scale. And that can be awful.

They talked about four things.

FOMO: Fear of missing out

Misinterpretation

Communicating with texts removes all the visual and tone-of-voice clues, so it's something to be really wary about.

"Like" anxiety

Likes on Facebook and Instagram too easily become a measure of popularity. It's exciting when you get them and painful when you don't.

It's hard not to count your Likes.

Achieving a balance

Dillon's suggestion was to think of all online and offline activities as slices in a pie chart. Each has a place — and caring about Likes is fine — as long as it doesn't overwhelm everything else you care about.

The teens' thoughtful answers and self-awareness are encouraging. And there's barely a moment in which the kids smiles' aren't communicating how much fun their online lives are.

Maybe they're up to the challenge after all.

Listen in:

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National Geographic Documentary Films
National Geographic Documentary Films
Family

Nat Geo's 'Blink' tracks a family finding beauty while facing blindness as they travel the globe

“Let's go all in and fill their visual memory with as much beauty as we can."

via Edith Lemay/NatGeo

Mia, Leo, Colin, and Laurent Pelletier pose on top of their camper van in front of adouble rainbow while in Mongolia.

True

“Blink,” a new film by National Geographic Documentary Films shows how a family with four children, three of whom are going blind, embraces life in the face of an uncertain future. It’s a testament to the resilience of the Lemay-Pelletier family but also a reminder for all of us to seize the day because all our futures are uncertain.

Edith Lemay and Sébastien Pelletier are the parents of Mia, a 13-year-old girl, and three boys: Léo, 11, Colin, 9, and Laurent, 7. Over the last six years, they’ve learned that Mia and the two youngest boys have retinitis pigmentosa, a rare genetic disease in which the cells of the retina slowly die. As the disease progresses, the person develops “tunnel vision” that shrinks until very little vision remains.

The diagnosis devastated the parents. "The hardest part with the diagnosis was inaction. There's nothing they can do about it. There's no treatment,” Edith says in the film.

However, even though the parents couldn’t affect the progress of the disease, they could give their children’s senses an epic experience that would benefit them for a lifetime.

“We don’t know how fast it’s going to go, but we expect them to be completely blind by mid-life,” said the parents. Mia’s impairment advisor suggested they fill her visual memory with pictures from books. “I thought, I’m not going to show her an elephant in a book; I’m going to take her to see a real elephant,” Edith explains in the film. “And I’m going to fill her visual memory with the best, most beautiful images I can.”

The Pelletier family (from left): Mia, Sebastien, Colin, Edith Lemay, Laurent and Leo inKuujjuaq, Canada.via National Geographic/Katie Orlinsky

This realization led to an inspiring year-long journey across 24 countries, during which every family member experienced something on their bucket list. Mia swam with dolphins, Edith rode a hot-air balloon in Cappadocia, and Léo saw elephants on safari.

Colin realized his dream of sleeping on a moving train while Sébastien saw the historic site of Angkor Wat.

“We were focusing on sights,” explains Pelletier. “We were also focusing a lot on fauna and flora. We’ve seen incredible animals in Africa but also elsewhere. So we were really trying to make them see things that they wouldn’t have seen at home and have the most incredible experiences.”

Cameras followed the family for 76 days as they traveled to far-flung locales, including Namibia, Mongolia, Egypt, Laos, Nepal and Turkey. Along the way, the family made friends with local people and wildlife. In a heartbreaking scene, the boys wept as the family had to leave behind a dog named Bella he befriended in the mountains of Nepal.

But the film isn't just about the wonders of nature and family camaraderie. The family's trip becomes a “nightmare” when they are trapped in a cable car suspended hundreds of feet above the Ecuadorian forest for over 10 hours.

annapurna range, blink, nat geoLeo, Laurent, Edith, Colin, Mia, and Sebastien look out at the mountains in the Annapurna range.via MRC/Jean-Sébastien Francoeur

As expected, NatGeo’s cinematographers beautifully capture the family's journey, and in the case of “Blink,” this majestic vision is of even greater importance. In some of the film's quietest moments, we see the children taking in the world's wonders, from the vast White Desert in Egypt to a fearless butterfly in Nepal, with the full knowledge that their sight will fail one day.

Along the way, the family took as many pictures as possible to reinforce the memories they made on their adventure. “Maybe they’ll be able to look at the photographs and the pictures and they will bring back those stories, those memories, of the family together,” Edith says.

But the film is about more than travel adventures and the pain of grief; ultimately, it’s about family.

“By balancing [the parents’ grief] with a more innocent and joyous tale of childlike wonder and discovery, we felt we could go beyond a mere catalog of locations and capture something universal,” the directors Edmund Stenson and Daniel Roher, said in a statement. “Keeping our camera at kid-height and intimately close to the family, we aimed to immerse the audience in the observational realities of their daily life, as well as the subtle relationships between each of them. This is a film built on looks, gestures and tiny details—the very fabric of our relationships with one another.”

Ultimately, “Blink” is a great film to see with your loved ones because it’s a beautiful reminder to appreciate the wonders of our world, the gift of our senses and the beauty of family.

The film will open in over 150 theaters in the U.S. and Canada beginning Oct. 4 and will debut on National Geographic Channel and stream on Disney+ and Hulu later this year. Visit the “Blink” website for more information.

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Science

Ecologist 'burst into tears' seeing endangered gliders using boxes designed to save them

A third of the greater gliders' remaining habitat was destroyed in the Australian wildfires, and researchers didn't know if their high-tech box idea would work.

Mark Gillow/Flickr

Greater gliders are endangered in Australia and rely on old-growth tree hollows to make their nests.

When a team of Australian researchers started checking the high-tech boxes they'd installed to help save endangered greater gliders, they weren't sure what they were going to find. The hope was that the tree-dwelling marsupials would use them for nesting—a replacement for the tree hollows they normally nest in—but no one knew whether or not the creatures would take to them.

So when Dr. Kita Ashman, Threatened Species and Climate Adaptation Ecologist at WWF-Australia, found a glider in the second box she checked, she was thrilled.

"I just burst into tears, I was so surprised and so happy," she told ABC News Australia.

Greater gliders are nocturnal marsupials that live in old-growth forests of eastern Australia. They have large ears, fluffy fur, long tails, and they can glide up to 100 meters at a time. The species is only found in Australia.

"I grew up looking at greater gliders all throughout the Dandenong Ranges. So they have a really special place in my heart," said Dr. Ashman told ANU.

The special nesting boxes were designed and created through a partnership between Australian National University (ANU), Greening Australia and the World Wide Fund for Nature-Australia after bushfires destroyed a third of the greater gliders' remaining habitat. The tree hollows that greater gliders rely on to nest can take over 100 years to form, according to ANU, so it's not like they can just find some new trees to live in when their homes are destroyed.

Nesting boxes that are commonly used for wildlife aren't a good fit for greater gliders, as the thin walls and lack of thermal protection can result in gliders overheating. (Heat-stressed gliders will slow their eating, which can be life-threatening, according to ANU.) The high-tech boxes in this project are insulated and include a non-toxic, heat-reflective, fire-resistant coating to keep gliders safe.

"I've affectionately been calling this design the Goldilocks box because we hope it will keep greater gliders not too hot and not too cold and will help to increase the species' resilience in a changing climate," Ashman said in July 2022.

"Producing and installing high-quality nest boxes is costly," added ANU research fellow Dr. Kara Youngentob, "so this project is very important because it will help us understand if expensive interventions like nest boxes are the best use of funding in our urgent mission to save greater gliders."

It appears that their efforts are paying off.

"What we didn't know was whether these boxes worked and whether they have an impact on the glider population," Dr. Youngentob told ABC News Australia. "Much to our delight, within a few months of them going up they are already being used by gliders, so we know the individuals themselves like them and use them."

According to Youngentob, greater gliders are the largest gliding marsupial at risk of extinction. More than 200 nesting boxes have been installed in Victoria's East Gippsland and in Tallaganda National Park in New South Wales. Youngentob told ABC News Australia that this project will help researchers learn more about how many of the species are left in the wild.

The quiet, nocturnal marsupial faces threats from climate change and deforestation in addition to the wildfires that ravaged Australia in 2020. Their population has fallen by 80% in the past 20 years and the species reached endangered status in July of 2022.

"They're a treasure for this country." Dr. Youngentob told ANU. "And I think the more people know about them, the more that they will fall in love with them and want to protect them too."


This article originally appeared on 1.20.23

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Someone stole their co-worker's pie from the office fridge then realized it was loaded with THC

An unforgettable lesson in why you shouldn't take someone's food without permission.

Photo credit: Canva

Someone ate a coworkers pie without permission–it was infused

There's nothing more annoying in an office setting than a coworker constantly eating food out of the break room fridge that isn't theirs. They know it's not theirs so they wait until no one is around to swipe whatever looks most appetizing. Sometimes it's a case of secretly bullying someone else by specifically eating one person's food or snacks left in the community space.

This sort of behavior can make anyone frustrated, especially if the victim of the food snatcher was looking forward to their packed lunch. Anyone who has experienced having their food taken has likely thought about how satisfactory it would feel to somehow get revenge on the culprit. One person didn't have to plot retaliatory strike, seems karma entered the room on this worker's day off.

Fola who owns, Sades Dulces where she sells baked goods uploaded a video detailing a phone call she received from a local business about a pie consumed by their employees.

Fola reveals that outside of her Sades Dulces, she sells THC infused pies, which is the same type of pie she recently delivered to a customer's employer. The state in which this occurred has legalized the selling and consumption of marijuana, including any products derived by the THC oils so someone ordering an infused pie wasn't out of the norm for this small business. In this case, she was directed to drop the pie off so the customer could take the pie home for the weekend. Unfortunately for everyone involved, the customer forgot the pie in the employee refrigerator.

two sliced pies on brown wooden chopping board Photo by Natalia Y. on Unsplash

That's when a sneaky office snacker, who works weekends, took it upon themselves to break open the brand new uneaten pie. They not only began to eat the pie, they shared the pie with eight other people, none of which knew the pie was infused with THC including the original pie thief.

"My customer doesn't work on the weekend so what ended up happening is that my customer put their pie into the 'frigerator at the job. We already know where I'm going with this, right," Fola says before continuing with the story.

Stealing Mike D GIF by Beastie BoysGiphy

She explains that the business called her asking a lot of questions about the pie because the people that ate it started to get sick causing the employer to need to call an ambulance. Fola tells the employer that the pie is infused with THC and everyone should be fine once it wears off but the woman refuses to give her customer's name fearing that they may get into trouble for the mishap.

Eventually Fola calls the customer to inform her about her nine coworkers eating her infused pie, which caused them to be sent home from work. According to Fola, the customer did not feel badly for her fellow coworkers, saying, "So, she's like 'oh my God.' And then she was like 'you know what, that's what they get because they keep eating people's food.'"

Raven Goodwin Eating GIF by FX NetworksGiphy

That's one way to learn a lesson about eating other people's food without permission. Of course if you're knowingly ingesting an edible containing THC, you expect to feel a little weird. These coworkers thought they were getting a regular piece of sweet potato pie and there was nothing to tip them off before consuming the product so they were likely caught off guard by their body's reaction. There's also the likelihood that the people who at the infused pie had never eaten infused foods previously, making the reaction even more concerning.

"If you've never had an edible before you are going to freak out because you don't know what's going on with your body," she laughs. "Half of them probably thought they were going to meet their maker so I can understand everybody freaking out."

@folathemasterpiece Infused pie gets people fired
♬ original sound - Fola

People in the comments found humor in the unauthorized pie eaters' misfortune while other's pointed out that the story makes a great marketing opportunity for the small business.

"Having a potluck on a pie you didn't purchase is WILDDDD," one person laughs.

"I'm crackin upppp. Chile this is why you cannot eat everybody food. Cause why the people at the office eating a pie that wasn't offered to them anyway lmao" another person asks.

"Why do people think it's ok to help themselves to other people's food or eat their lunch when not offered to them. It could have been something that they are allergic to. I'm sharing this video," someone giggles.

That 70S Show Lol GIF by PeacockGiphy

One person recalls what happened when they took too much of an edible by mistake, "My friend gave me a 50g edible, and mind you I like both flowers and edibles...I'm use to about 20-50g. I look at the package after I consumed and it was 500g. Thought was going to legit be the first one in history to die from canna...Almost drove to the hospital and snitched on myself."

Thankfully everyone who ate the pie is just fine, though they continued to be a little buzzed the day after the incident according to Fola's follow up video. But it's surely an unforgettable lesson on why you don't eat food out of a community refrigerator that doesn't belong to you.

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Pop Culture

Guy who sounds remarkably like Michael Jackson gets 27 million views on first TikTok video

Holy moly that voice.

Constru-centro/Wikimedia Commons

Brandon Conway sounds remarkably like Michael Jackson when he sings.

When Michael Jackson died 13 years ago, the pop music world lost a legend. However markedly mysterious and controversial his personal life was, his contributions to music will go down in history as some of the most influential of all time.

Part of what made him such a beloved singer was the uniqueness of his voice. From the time he was a young child singing lead for The Jackson 5, his high-pitched vocals stood out. Hearing him sing live was impressive, his pitch-perfect performances always entertaining.

No one could ever really be compared to MJ, or so we thought. Out of the blue, a guy showed up on TikTok recently with a casual performance that sounds so much like the King of Pop it's blowing people away.

Brandon Conway posted his first TikTok video ever on July 24, and in less than three weeks it's been viewed more than 27 million times. It's just him standing in a parking lot snapping his fingers and singing "The Way You Make Me Feel," but when he opens his mouth, whoa.

As he keeps going, it gets even more whoa. Then he hits Jackson's signature "he he" and the whoa turns into what?!?

Take a listen:

@brandonconway11

First post on tiktok let me know what you guys think! More videos coming soon feom mj to country to rock so yall be sure to stay tuned!#fyp #singer #usherchallenge @usher @tpain #letsgo #firstvideo

Uncanny, right? If you need a reminder of how Jackson himself sounded when he sang it, here's a live performance from Auckland during his 1996 world tour.

Very impressive. You can follow Brandon Conway on TikTok to hear more from him.


This article originally appeared on 8.10.22

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Parenting

New study reveals the correct way to respond when your kid gets hurt

Showing concern when your child falls over can make things worse.

yang miao/Unsplash

Every parent has experienced the two-stage reaction to their kid falling down while running around. Step one: Freeze and hold your breath. Maybe if you don't react, they won't cry. Right? Step two: This time, they're actually hurt. Here come the tears. You move in to go inspect the boo-boo and. Good news... 'tis but a scratch!

But for some reason they won't stop crying and saying how bad it hurts. "Come on, shake it off," you insist. "It's not that bad." You wonder if they're hamming up the near-invisible wound for a little extra attention, maybe you start to get annoyed.

A new study just found that if you behave this way, you'll scar your children for life. OK, just kidding. They'll be fine! But there is a simple, more effective way to handle boo-boos, both big and small.

A study in the journal aptly named Pain reveals that validating a child's pain, however minor, can have huge benefits.

girl crying on the sidewalkUnsplash

Whether a child has a microscopic scrape on their knee or is going into the hospital for a major operation, validation is the key.

How do you validate a child's pain, fear, or discomfort? It can take a lot of forms, including active listening ("I hear you..."), naming emotions or sensations ("It sounds like it stings."), praising or engaging with their healthy coping habits ("Great job being brave!"), or even just telling them it's normal and OK to feel whatever they're feeling ("I understand why you're scared.")

In Psychology Today, Ashley Hawthorn, a sensory studies expert, explains the study's relevance like this:

As adults, we develop a higher tolerance of pain. Small aches and pains are easily ignored in many cases. Sometimes, we expect children to be able to do this, too. But we forget that they're still learning what pain in, how to recognize it, and most importantly, how to cope with it.

A simple gesture to the effect of "Yes, you have correctly identified that you are in pain!" — as silly as it sounds — can help a child build confidence in their internal experiences.

Even if you think they may be blowing that pain out of proportion. That confidence can build on itself and continue to reap benefits long into adulthood.

“When a parent or doctor validates a child’s experiences in a way that matches their expressed vulnerability, it helps the child to feel accepted, builds connection and trust, and may help the child to develop critical skills in regulating their emotions,” lead study author Dr. Sarah B. Wallwork told Science Daily.

It makes sense the more you think about it.

If a parent or doctor questions the validity of a child's pain, it may make them more apprehensive about coming forward later in life. And this is true of everyone, not just children! We all need to be told and shown that what we're feeling is valid.

"By validating children's experiences of pain, they are likely to hold fewer negatively biased memories of pain and be in better position to seek help in the future, when then need it," Wallwork said.

Because pain is heavily tied to emotions and memories, using this approach can actually help children experience less pain when they're older. Wild, right?

Critically, validation and reassurance are different things, and can have very different outcomes

Validation means agreeing that your child's pain is real and, well, valid. It might sound like "I'm sorry that hurts," or, "It's OK to be nervous." Validation is not to be confused with reassurance. Reassurance is meant to be positive and make a person feel better about the situation. "You can get through this!" or "Don't worry, you're OK."

Confusingly, there's some evidence that reassurance has a negative effect on children's pain and distress, even though it sounds comforting!

A study in The Journal of Pediatrics says: "Reassurance may serve as a warning to the child that the caregiver is anxious, knows something bad is about to happen, or both."

Maybe this explains why initially ignoring it when your toddler topples over can sometimes prevent the hysterical tears, versus running over immediately with concern. It sounds like a lot to remember, but the framework is really simple. The next time your kid is in pain, scared, worried, or all of the above — all you have to do is listen and believe them.

If you can distract them or help them cope with their pain in a healthy way? You're cruising to Parent of the Year status.

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Family

Teen shares why he won't change his 'girly' name even though his parents have serious regrets

His parents want him to choose a more "professional" name before college, but he won't have it.

via Canva

A teen fights with his parents to keep his name.

As parents age, they may regret the names they give their children. This is especially true as they get older and have to enter the professional world, where studies show unusual names are a hindrance. However, should they have the right to change their child’s name as a teen if their child isn’t into it?

That’s the crux of a recent viral story on Reddit’s AITA forum.

A 16-year-old boy who goes by the username 1ft2nyn shared how, for the past 6 years, his parents have been nudging him to use a different name, but he isn’t interested. “My parents started to regret my name when I was maybe 10 … [They] started sometimes calling me by my middle name and only stopping when I told them it was weird and I liked my first name. When I was 13, they asked me if I ever went by a nickname and I said no,” he wrote.

The boy’s name is Sunny, which was intentionally spelled with a u, the common girl’s spelling, instead of an o, as in the traditional boy’s spelling of “Sonny.” Sunny says his parents chose the name as a middle finger to their parents, who had insisted on having a hand in naming their previous kids.

names, baby names, name regretA teen fights with his parents to keep his name.via Canva

A year ago, the parents asked Sunny if he wanted to change his name to something “more adult” to spare him the expense of changing the name on his diploma when he graduates college. But Sunny wouldn’t budge. “I was like, ‘Oh, I guess if people want that, it makes sense.’ Then I said, ‘It must suck to hate your name.’

Six months ago, Sunny’s parents said he looked a lot like a “James” and asked if he liked the name Luke. Three months ago, they tried again and presented him with 3 new name options, and he declined to make the change. “They said they feel like they named me as a big f*** you to their families but felt bad that I had such an unserious name for a man. I told them I didn't want to change my name and I always loved the way they talked about finding my name,” Sunny wrote.

It’s interesting to note that the parent's final appeal to Sunny was as much about their own feelings as his. “They said they really didn't want to live with the guilt,” Sunny wrote. “I told them how I feel about my name is more important now. They told me I should at least think of their feelings and that I should consider the future and whether I'll be taken seriously.”

names, baby names, name regretA teen fights with his parents to keep his name.via Canva

So, is Sunny wrong for refusing to change his name to appease his parents and possibly make his professional life less challenging? The commenters on the post overwhelmingly supported Sunny for standing strong and keeping his name.

“Sonny or Sunny, regardless how you spell it is a perfectly normal name for a male. An identity is intertwined with a name and it's hard to separate the two. You, and you alone, are the person that should decide if you want to change your name,” Naisfurious wrote. “It sounds like your parents are more concerned about their feelings regarding your name than your feelings. that name is yours, you're your own person, and if you don't want to change your name because you like it, then don't. those are their feelings to live with, and putting them on you as a child is unfair and weird. I also have a weather name and I still love it, and i'm almost thirty. More power to you!” Anxious-Nobody-4966 added.

Because Sunny isn’t an adult, there is a slight chance that his parents could change his name without his consent. Some commenters said Sunny should take a firm stand and let his parents know there will be consequences for pushing too hard on this issue.

“Make it clear to your parents that if they were to do that there would be serious long term consequences for your relationship and that you will NEVER answer to or acknowledge that name under any circumstances and will have your name changed back the day you turn 18,” CelticMusebooks wrote. “Let them know the harder they push, the more stubborn you’ll be and if they don’t watch out, their grandson is going to be sunny jr. Whether you actually have a jr. is up to you, but it might help shut them up for now,” RezCuong added.

Ultimately, Sunny only has 2 more years left to fend off his parents and keep his name. The post he made on Reddit received over 2,000 comments from people who have his back, so it has to have given him the shot in the arm he needs to keep standing firm. This post is a great example of people pulling hard for someone to lean into positivity instead of settling for a boring name that looks good on a resume.

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