upworthy

healthy eating

Self-care is not what we've be taught one therapist explains

Self-care. It's something that has been co-opted by wellness influencers and gurus that somehow (and all-too-often) involves spending money on something luxurious. Self-care is often branded as things like pedicures, vacations, and hour-long massages at the spa, but according to Dr. Raquel Martin, we've been doing self-care all wrong.

In July 2024, Martin—a licensed psychologist—uploaded a video to her Instagram explaining what self-care is truly supposed to be. Spoiler alert? It's not meant to be indulgent. At least, indulgence shouldn't be an all-the-time expectation of self-care. Martin acknowledges that the wellness industry has monetized and conflated self-care with self-indulgence, and she explains that having self-care propped up as something that is indulgent isolates people who cannot afford those types of activities.

The psychological toll for conflating self-care with self-indulgence can get dangerously high. In the 2020 Psychology Today article, "Why Does Self-Care Sometimes Feel So Hard?", author and licensed psychologist Alicia H. Clark Psy.D notes that "indulgence stops being self-care when you feel guilty or unhappy with yourself, and this threshold is different for everyone." She goes on to say that "one person's self-caring indulgence can be another's gateway to self-harm, depending on your relationship with the activity, your capacity for moderation, and the reality of its consequences." This makes wellness influencers who tout a heavily indulgent, "treat yo' self" ideology of self-care all the more dangerous. Self-care is not one size fits all, and for those who struggle with self-discipline and moderation, the mindset can do more harm than good.

self-care, indulgence, moderation, treats, discipline Parks And Recreation Treat Yo Self GIFGiphy

So, what is self-care actually? How is it achieved? And is it always supposed to feel good? Dr. Martin goes on to share how she practices self-care, and what she lays out was surprising her viewers. According to Martin, "Self-care is not responding to every call and, if I do not have the bandwidth to have the conversation, stating that I don't have the bandwidth to have the conversation." She also notes that she says "No" to things she doesn't want to do, sets a financial budget, and does not drink caffeine after 4 p.m.

These things might seem a little boring when compared to indulgent self-care, but one thing is clear: these self-care practices are actually good for Martin's body, health, and overall wellness.

Much of what Martin listed are things a lot of people don't consider as self-care, but in actuality, self-care is defined simply by taking care of one's self. This means practicing self-care is getting in a few minutes of exercise a day, drinking more water, or spending time with friends. You don't have to spend money to care for yourself.

yoga, exercise, movement, body, health, self-careA woman practices Yoga.Image via Canva.

Commenters were shocked and thankful for Martin's clarification on what self-care is actually supposed to be:

"Love this list!! As a massage therapist, I have to call out the misconception that massage is indulgent. I'm always telling my patients that self care is more than a bath. I will be sharing this list with my patients. I'm also trying to make massage more accessible," one person writes.

"Thank you for this post. I’m internalizing your advice to see how I can apply. You resonated with my thoughts on so many levels. However, you also provided some clarity and food for thought/fuel for action," another says.

"I really appreciate what you said about pallet cleansers! Sometimes I get frustrated with myself because I'm not able to read and consume and learn about all the issues different people are facing. It's really important to me to learn about those things, not just for awareness, but also so I can do something about it. But self care is so important throughout that, like leaving my phone in the other room, or watching my comfort shows like you said. I often read kids books or TV because of how horrible the world is right now, and I need something extremely wholesome to balance it out. Also, workshop? I'm not sure what that means but I like learning from you. Thanks," another viewer shares.

So, maybe it's time to collectively ditch those indulgent expectations of self-care and really take a look at ways we can actually care for ourselves instead.

This article originally appeared last year.

True
Robert Wood Johnson Foundation

Whether you are a foodie, a chef, a food stamp recipient, or all of the above, if you live in Oakland, California, you might be shopping at Freedom Farmers’ Market.

That might come across as an unusual mix of people if you’re new to the farmers market scene, but it's actually becoming the norm.

Over the past 30 years, farmers markets have surged in popularity. With a community feel, assorted selections of fresh foods, and sourcing from local farms, the farmers market can be one of the best ways to get your food.


For many low-income people, accessing fresh food is a challenge — butit’s especially important for them to overcome the challenge.

A California farmers market. All images via Carle Brinkman.

For instance, consider the families who need help getting food during a financially difficult time. Sometimes, they're struggling after a sudden layoff or a medical emergency. Sometimes, they need food assistance after a natural disaster — like the fires that recently devastated parts of California including Napa Valley, which is just across the Bay from the Freedom Farmers’ Market.  

So, they turn to SNAP (Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program) — the program known as “food stamps.” In almost two thirds of those households that participate, recipients are elderly, disabled, or children — people whose health can really depend on a nutritional diet made up of fresh fruit and vegetables.

But with a limited budget, it’s often cheaper and more convenient to buy processed foods.

That’s why incentive programs like Market Match are stepping up to help them access the fresh food they need at farmers markets.

Market Match is a California program that helps people use their SNAP benefits at locations like the Freedom Farmers Market in Oakland, a city with a poverty rate that's higher than the national average.

Here’s how it works: Farmers market shoppers use their SNAP benefits, known in California as CalFresh, to pay for food. When they buy eligible foods like fruits and veggies, Market Match then provides matching funds so they can buy even more.

That means, for example, that a parent with $10 to spend on their EBT card can bring home $20 worth of fresh produce — which makes a big difference for someone who’s trying to feed their kids healthy food on a limited budget.

“When SNAP shoppers come to market using their CalFresh benefits, they’re people just trying to feed their kids and make ends meet,” says Martin Bourque, executive director of Berkeley’s Ecology Center, the organization that runs the Market Match program. “Market Match was designed to empower people receiving those benefits to make healthier food choices and to participate in the local food system.”

When Market Match launched in 2009, they were at 44 farmers markets. Today, the program operates in over 290 locations, and includes manuals for market managers, trainings for out-of-state markets, and plans to keep expanding in the coming years.

Programs like Market Match help empower people to make healthy choices, regardless of their economic status.

Throughout the state, the results clearly show that Market Match has a big impact. In 2017, 73% of low-income customers surveyed said they ate more fruits and vegetables as a result of the program. 85% said they’re buying new kinds of fruits and vegetables.

And this difference matters a lot.

“Diet-related illness is really disproportionately impacting people living in poverty,” says Bourque. “Being able to eat fresh, and local, and organic, and overcoming some of the cost barriers so that everyone can have access to healthy, sustainable, and just food is important."

California’s certainly not the only state where health improves when cost barriers fall. Nationwide, farmers markets with SNAP incentives see higher sales from SNAP shoppers. And shoppers at these markets are improving their diets, eating almost a quarter cup more of fruits and vegetables.

“More SNAP eligible shoppers are coming to market, they're spending more dollars at market, and they're buying a broader variety of foods than they normally would,” says Bourque.

As one surveyed shopper reported back: “Being able to eat new foods has completely changed the way my family and I live our lives. We are beginning to understand the importance of a healthy lifestyle.”

The perks of SNAP at farmers markets reach local farmers and the economy too.

“Being able to contribute directly to the health of my community with the produce we grow is what keeps us farming year after year,” Moira, a produce seller for Marin Roots Farm, told Market Match in 2016.

When SNAP recipients are empowered to shop at the farmers market, they help lift up their whole community, including farmers like Moira.

And with every $5 in SNAP benefits generating $9 for local economies, low-income families are also helping to improve their communities.

In 2017, Market Match shoppers spent $4.4 million at farmers markets — generating more than $7.9 million in economic activity across the state.

When low-income shoppers get a chance to make healthy choices for their families and communities, they take it.

With programs like these, we can see the incredible difference these offers are making for SNAP participants everyday.

People are empowered to eat healthy food, local farmers are supported and the economy of a whole community benefits.

The research is full of exciting results — like showing that SNAP recipients shopping at farmers markets feel a greater sense of community. With people of all different backgrounds interacting at the farmers market, many say the market’s best benefit is that it “brings people together.”

For the communities that support these food systems, there are many more proud days ahead.

True
Gates Foundation: The Story of Food

Random thoughts I have while looking at sweet potatoes:

"You'd look great as a plate of fries."

"Honestly, who was the first to decide to put marshmallows all over you?"


"Wait. Are these yams?"

A thought I have never had: This type of potato saves lives.

As it turns out, they might actually do just that.

Image via iStock.

Welsy Anena's mother is convinced that orange sweet potatoes saved her daughter's life.  

Not in a "thanks for the side dish, I was so hungry!" kind of way. In an actual life-saving way.

Her daughter, Welsy, had been so sick as a baby, and in and out of a Ugandan hospital — sometimes in such serious condition, her mom didn't know if she'd even make it. But when her baby started being fed orange-fleshed sweet potatoes, her health turned around and now she's a vibrant, healthier kid. Whoa.

Her mom's story isn't the only one that depicts sweet potatoes as an edible hero.

You see, Welsy suffered from Vitamin A deficiency — the leading cause of preventable blindness in developing countries. In Uganda, 1 out of every 3 kids under 5 suffers from Vitamin A deficiency, resulting in almost 30,000 child deaths every year. And that's just in one country.

Orange sweet potatoes can help.

Image via International Potato Center, used with permission.

While orange sweet potatoes are common in the United States, they are very new in Africa.

For hundreds of years, Africans have had their own version of a sweet potato: white and yellow in color, very starchy and firm, and frankly, a terrible source of vitamin A.

That's a heavy contrast from the type of sweet potatoes we find in our grocery stores in the U.S., where they are carrot-colored and known for their vitamins and nutrients, especially their vitamin A.

Researchers had an idea: If orange sweet potatoes combat vitamin A deficiency, what would happen if they could get communities to eat them instead?

Maybe it could help prevent blindness and death in kids. They're finding out.

For the past 15 years, the International Potato Center (CIP) has been leading the way on introducing the orange-fleshed sweet potato in Africa.

Image via the International Potato Center, used with permission.

It's been an adventure and easier said than done. Africans initially scoffed at the idea of orange sweet potatoes. No way. The potatoes had a weird texture and weren't what they were used to eating. They were also grown differently from their traditional type of sweet potatoes. All signs pointed to no. Can you blame them?

The research team from CIP took note and developed a starchier version of the orange sweet potato that still contained more vitamin A than other potatoes, but tasted more in line with what Africans were accustomed to.

Once they had the potato how they wanted it, they had to get people to want to eat it.

They created widespread marketing campaigns that, according to Smithsonian magazine, included radio advertisements and visits to villages in vehicles with sweet potatoes painted on the side.

They traveled around the region teaching about the sweet potato's nutrition.

Image via the International Potato Center, used with permission.

And showed the power of eating them through pictures and words.

Image via the International Potato Center, used with permission.

They made sure to have a big presence at exhibitions and community-wide events.

Image via the International Potato Center, used with permission.

Children's songs were written and performed about the potatoes.

Image via the International Potato Center, used with permission.

The campaign worked. And it's still working today.

Today, the orange-fleshed sweet potato has reached 2.2 million households, which amounts to roughly 10 million people in Africa.

Scientists are super optimistic at the ability to reduce vitamin A deficiency through this new exposure to the potato. They project that by 2023, 30 million children could be saved from blindness and death because of it.

"We have evidence that  eating 125g of orange-flesh sweet potato provides a child the amount of vitamin A required to prevent blindness from vitamin A deficiency," wrote Joel Ranck, head of communications for the CIP, in an email."125g is about the size of one small sweetpotato."

It's no wonder the research team, comprised of Dr. Jan Low, Maria Andrade, and Robert Mwanga from the CIP, and Howarth Bouis of Harvest Plus, just won the 2016 World Food Prize for their work on this initiative. Bravo!

Image via the International Potato Center, used with permission.

Together they have built new excitement and hope surrounding child nutrition and preventable blindness in the 14 countries where the orange-flesh sweet potato is now available, with more countries to come.

Agnes Amony, a Ugandan farmer told Harvest Plus, "I began feeding my child on these nutritious foods following the knowledge I attained in the recommended feeding practices for children under five. My child began gaining weight steadily and I am in no doubt that these foods have saved my child’s life. I am forever grateful and will never stop feeding my child on these food crops."

Every step counts. Or, in this case, every bite.

See more on how the orange-flesh sweet potato could, in fact, change the world: