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Fatherhood

The new daddy 'poo timer' is a funny gift idea, but it calls attention to a real issue

"Today I started a new rule. If he is in the bathroom for more than 10 minutes, I flip the wifi off."

via Dude I Want That

There are many, many things that change in a household after children arrive. The number of toys and bright-colored items strewn about the house make it look like a clown moved in.

Parents soon give up any chance of watching a TV show they enjoy until after the children go to bed.

The refrigerator becomes jam-packed with juice boxes, go-gurts, and large frozen bags of chicken nuggets.

There's also a strange disappearing act that happens.

"Mom, where's dad?" the child asks.

"He's in the bathroom," mom replies with a shrug.

Funny, before children, dad used to be in and out of the bathroom in a few minutes. Now, he spends thirty minutes staring at his phone, watching YouTube, and setting his fantasy baseball lineup in his new palace of solace.

While it's always good to get some alone time, it becomes a problem when dad leaves his spouse to handle the child-rearing and chores because he's taking his time on the throne.

In a recent story covered by Upworthy, a mother on Reddit admitted she turns off the wi-fi in the house if her husband takes too long in the restroom.

"Over the past couple months he has been spending more and more time in there," the mother wrote. "He always takes his phone. He is always watching YouTube. His average session is 25 minutes in there, often longer, rarely shorter."

"Today I started a new rule. If he is in the bathroom for more than 10 minutes, I flip the wifi off," she wrote. "He has not spent more than 15 minutes in the bathroom at a stretch today, but is extremely upset."

For those who find that tactic a bit drastic, Katamco has created the Toilet Timer, an hour-glass style timer that can be flipped over when dad enters the bathroom.

"The Toilet Timer is for the poo-crastinator taking their sweet time," reads the product description. "This is a sand timer that runs for about five minutes. Help your loved one get back to the people they are trying to avoid."

While the daddy poo-timer seems like a fun passive-aggressive gag gift, there's a real reason it exists. After having kids, the average dad's time spent on the pot goes up considerably.

A poll of 1,000 British men found that dads spend seven hours a year hiding from their families in the bathroom.

The poll found that 25% of men said if they couldn't escape to the bathroom they "don't know how they'd cope." A third said that a trip to the bathroom is the only time they get to themselves.

Fourteen percent stow away items such as books, magazines, and food for the time they spend in their palace of solitude.

Who the hell eats while sitting on the toilet?

Domestic life can be stressful for both parents. Maybe if these dads need a breather from the trials of domesticity they should just ask their spouses? That seems to be a much more constructive way of handling the stress than hiding out in fear.


This article originally appeared on 3.5.20

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Identity

'Normal and natural': Scientists admit the animal kingdom is a lot gayer than they thought

It's “widespread and natural in the animal kingdom.”

via DSD/Pexels and Sebastian Voortman/Pexels

Some adorable penguins and monkeys.

LGBTQ people have faced discrimination around the globe for centuries. A big reason is that non-heterosexual relationships have been seen as unnatural by both church and state. LGBTQ people have either been seen as acting against the will of God for rejecting the traditional family structure or, nature, for engaging in sexual activity that doesn’t result in reproduction.

However, science has slowly been striking down the idea that homosexuality is unnatural by proving that it’s seen across countless species, from bonobo monkeys to black swans to fruit flies. A landmark 2019 research paper found that over 1500 species of animals exhibit homosexual behavior.

However, now it appears that the paper wildly underestimated the amount of homosexual activity happening in nature.

A new report published on June 20, 2024, in the journal PLOSOne shows that same-sex sexual behavior in the animal kingdom is much more prevalent than previously documented. The big reason is that researchers have been underreporting their observations.

The study surveyed 65 experts and 77% said that they had observed same-sex sexual behavior in the species they studied. However, only 48% reported collecting data on the observations and only 18% published their findings.

“Many respondents reported that their lack of recording data or publishing on SSSB [same-sex sexual behavior] was due to a perception that it was very rare,” Karyn Anderson, a PhD candidate in evolutionary anthropology at the Univerity of Texas, who led the study, told CNN. “When looked at on a broader scale, we found instead that it was very commonly observed by our survey participants.”

Anderson adds that homosexuality is, in fact, “widespread and natural in the animal kingdom.”

The news doesn’t surprise Josh Davis, author of “A Little Gay Natural History,” a book that examines the diversity of sexual behavior in the natural world.

“Whilst it has only been officially recorded in around 1,500 species, this figure is likely a massive underestimate,” he told IFL Science. “This is because it can be found in pretty much every branch of the evolutionary tree, from beetles and butterflies to turtles and squirrels, so the idea that it is limited to just a few hundred species out of the 2.13 million described to date is incredibly unlikely.”

“There’s a growing suggestion it’s normal and natural to almost every species,” he added. “It’s probably more rare to be a purely heterosexual species.”

lgbtq, gay animals, sexuality research

People enjoying a pride parade.

via Aleks Magnusson/Pexels

At first, it may seem as though same-sex sexual behavior runs counter to evolution. If animals reproduce through heterosexual intercourse, why do some still have same-sex relations?

Researchers believe that homosexuality may have evolved in humans because individuals with a degree of same-sex attraction benefit from greater social integration, mobility, and stronger social bonds. So, there is a survival benefit to participating in same-sex sexual behavior.

These developments are further proof that humans and the rest of the animal kingdom have never been exclusively heterosexual and those that have same-sex relations are as natural as those who do not. It seems the more we learn about the science of sexuality, the more we realize that Lady Gaga was right on the mark when she wrote “Born This Way.”

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Culture

Listen to these cheeky turkeys 'laugh' after one of them nips CNN's Anna Stewart in the bum

Anna Stewart/Twitter

CNN reporter Anna Stewart getting goosed by a turkey.

When your job has you standing in the middle of a huddled-up flock of hundreds of turkeys, you already know to expect the unexpected. But for CNN's Anna Stewart, the unexpected also turned out to be hilarious—in more ways than one.

As she was reporting from the KellyBronze turkey farm in Essex, England, Stewart found herself the literal butt of a turkey joke, and goodness did they find it funny. Stewart shared an outtake scene from a CNN segment on U.K. worker shortages and supply chain issues on Twitter, with the comment "Turns out what turkeys REALLY like is a good laugh, at my expense."

Seriously, you'll want the sound up for this:

One of the turkeys nipped her right in the bum, and when she whooped and laughed, the entire flock laughed too.

"Ow! That really hurt, he really got my a**," Stewart said. And right on cue, the turkeys laughed again.

Okay, they didn't actually laugh, but it sure sounds like they did. Their collective gobbling sounds just like a studio audience laugh track. Too, too funny.

Someone shared the outtake video on the Animals Being Jerks subreddit (which is a hilarious thing in its own right) and that prompted people to share videos it reminded them of.

Years ago, a video went viral of a man gobbling at a bunch of turkeys and them gobbling right back. Apparently, turkeys are quite reactive to sounds. And again, sounds like a laugh track (though the man's tearful laughter is really the best part).

Man gobbles at turkeys, turkeys gobble back.www.youtube.com

In another clip, a man appears to be giving a dictator speech to a huge warehouse full of turkeys, who keep cheering him on.

The turkey dictator.www.youtube.com

And in the actual aired CNN segment, Anna Stewart got the gaggle of gobblers to giggle just by clapping her hands. Not quite as entertaining as when one of them goosed her, but it's funny to see how easy it is to get them to react.

Thanks for the laughs, cheeky turkeys.

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Education & Information

A brutally honest kindergarten teacher shares five reasons why she quit the profession

via Jessica Gentry / Facebook

This article originally appeared on 11.04.19


Teachers in modern-day America face a whole host of problems. Under-funded schools, low pay, union busting, an overemphasis on standardized testing, and children who are addicted to technology.

But it seems the biggest problem for many teachers is dealing with parents.

"Today, new teachers remain in our profession an average of just 4.5 years, and many of them list 'issues with parents' as one of their reasons for throwing in the towel," Ron Clark, motivation speaker and author of five,books on education, said in a CNN editorial.

"Word is spreading, and the more negativity teachers receive from parents, the harder it becomes to recruit the best and the brightest out of colleges," Clark continued.

Jessica Gentry, a former kindergarten teacher for 12 years at at Stone Spring Elementary School in Harrisonburg, Virginia, wrote a viral Facebook thread about why she's left the profession and says that parents were a major reason.

"I think it's easier for people to believe that I left teaching because of the lousy pay," she wrote in a post last June that received over 270,000 reactions and 220,000 shares.

RELATED: Science proves 'kids these days' are fine—it's the adults who tend to be oblivious a-holes

"It was easier for my former HR director to believe it was because I found something that I was more passionate about. Some would allow them to assume that... let them be comfortable in their assumptions because your truth may lead to discomfort of others," she continued.

Gentry made a list of five major reasons why she left the profession and she held absolutely nothing back. Here is an edited version of her five reasons, you can read the whole post here.

1. The old excuse "the kids have changed". No. No friggin way. Kids are kids. PARENTING has changed. SOCIETY has changed. The kids are just the innocent victims of that. Parents are working crazy hours, consumed by their devices, leaving kids in unstable parenting/coparenting situations, terrible media influences... and we are going to give the excuse that the KIDS have changed?

2. In the midst of all of this... our response is we need to be "21st Century" schools. 1 to 1 student to technology. Oh. Okay. So forget the basics of relationship building and hands on learning. Kids already can't read social cues and conduct themselves appropriately in social settings... let's toss more devices at them because it looks good on our website.

3. And since our technology approach doesn't seem to be working, teachers must need more training. So take away two planning periods a week. And render that time utterly worthless when it comes to ADDING to the quality of the instruction.

4. Instead of holding parents accountable... and making them true partners, we've adopted a customer service mindset. I've seen the Facebook rants about attendance and getting "the letter". Well, here's the thing... I can't teach your child if he's not in school. I was cussed out by parents who wanted to attend field trips but missed the THREE notes that went home--and when they did attend a trip, sat on their phone the entire time. I've had parents stand me up multiple times on Conference Days then call to tattle on me when I refused to offer an after school option. I've had parents tell me that I'm not allowed to tell their child 'no'...

5. My mental and physical health was in jeopardy every.single.day. Knowing that your kids need and deserve more than they're getting. Sitting in one meeting after another, begging for more support, only to be told 'don't lose sleep over them'... when you LOVE your kids and are PASSIONATE about your mission... these messages tear you apart.

Gentry left the profession to focus on ways to help children where she believes they need it most, in their own homes.

RELATED: A dad's viral kindergarten field trip post highlights how freaking amazing teachers are

"I decided to start with my 1 at home... and work to help other mommas be able to show up for their ones at home," she wrote. "Because... I really do believe it starts there. I found something that allows me to impact the environments that [her former students] go home to."

In an interview with "Good Morning America," Gentry said the response to her viral post has been "overwhelmingly positive."

"There is an enormous amount of educators who feel that exact way but have felt alone and guilty for thinking so," Gentry told "Good Morning America." "I never expected it to reach farther than a few friends -- but I am so humbled to be able to throw the curtains open on the issue and give those who feel unable to say it a voice."

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