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People share the hard truth that pretty people have these 13 advantages over everyone else

Understanding the privilege is the first step to correcting it.

via Canva/Photos

Three very good-looking people.

As the world becomes increasingly more concerned with the ways that humans perpetrate bias across many different traits, such as race, ethnicity, income level, sex, gender, and sexuality, a spotlight has been shone on the advantages that people get for being good-looking. It’s another way some thrive because of their genetic luck, while others must work much harder for equal treatment.

Sure, looks aren’t 100% genetic. Some people can become more attractive by leading a healthy lifestyle or having cosmetic surgery. But genetics set a ceiling on how conventionally good-looking someone can be. The notion that some people are treated better (or worse) because of how they look is known colloquially as “pretty privilege,” but it stems from a term first coined by psychologist Edward Thorndike in 120: the halo effect.

Why are pretty people treated better?

The halo effect is a cognitive bias that states that when people have a favorable overall impression of someone, it influences how they feel about their specific traits. So, someone who people think is good-looking will also be seen as more moral, capable, and intelligent. Conversely, less conventionally attractive people are seen as more likely to be criminals or of lower intelligence.

pretty girl, good looking woman, brown hair, nice smile, modelA brown-haired woman smiling.via Canva/Photos

The halo effect is a fancy way of explaining that hot people have many advantages socially and professionally. They also get a better shake of things from the legal system.

A Redditor asked the AskReddit subforum a blunt question: “What’s something attractive people can do, that ugly people can't?” Here are 13 of the best responses to the question to give everyone a better idea of what pretty privilege means in everyday life.

1. Help from strangers

"Anyone can ask, but attractive people are so much more likely to get help from strangers. Just a sad little twisted fact of life."

"Some people would even deny help because the person offering is unattractive."

"This is what I was thinking. I used to be pretty, now I’m older and definitely less so, just being honest. I used to get people just offering to do things like fix my car or something in my apartment. Now it’s all wait in line and pay up which makes sense. Just an odd transition."

2. Get good tips

"Get good tips as a waitress/waiter without REALLY trying."

"A super hot friend of mine used to only work 2-3 nights a week because she made so much in tips. Haven't seen her in a while, but I remember that conversation."

"Good god THIS. I'm not spectacularly attractive, but I bartend a shift with someone who is. The level of obliviousness with her when she's confused as to why guys slide her $20-$30 tips while I'm getting twenty percent at best is absolutely bonkers."


attractive woman, good looking woman, model, black hair, pretty womanA model looking beautiful. via Canva/Photos

3. Free drinks

"Go out broke and come home drunk."

"Yeah, I have a couple of female friends who were super hot back in the day (2000-2004 time frame). One had Jessica Rabbit's body, and the other was prettier, if not so curvy. It wasn't uncommon to go out with them, and we'd all get free drinks because bar managers wanted them to be hanging out in their bar - people would apparently pop their head in and decide to stay based on how many/how hot the girls in the bar were. Our friends were sharp and realized they were driving that boat and would demand free drinks for all of us, not just them."


attractive woman, good looking woman, model, blonde hair, pretty womanAn attractive woman.via Canva/Photos

4. Easier to make it in showbiz

"Singer / artist. Even though looks have nothing to do with talent. Makes me wonder how many amazing voices are not being heard because the record company old fat dudes don't think the artist is hot."

5. People assume you're a good person

"Yeah, it's called the halo effect. We tend to assume attractive people are nicer and smarter."

"It doesn't help that children's books, cartoons, and movies like Lord of the Rings put such big emphasis on 'pretty = good, ugly = bad.'"

6. Easy to flirt

"Flirt without cringe backlash."

"There is a great How I Met Your Mother episode about that. If you’re hot (or if the other person is into it) super creepy actions come across as romantic. It’s part of the reason no one should ever take dating advice from romcoms."



7. They're treated nicely

"The funny thing is, pretty people constantly bitch that everyone hates them for being beautiful or think that they're stupid. Like nah... maybe once in a blue moon you'll run into a hater and it'll stick out to you... but nah."

8. They get the benefit of the doubt

"In general, get the benefit of the doubt. Applies to so many situations. Make a mistake, oh everyone makes a mistake sometimes. Acting mean, they’re probably having a bad day. Something unfortunate happens to then, why do bad things happen to good people?"


attractive man, blue-eyed man, gay man, man holding man, handsome manA good-looking man embraced by his lover.via Canva/Photos

9. Get the job

"Get hired is a HUGE one no one talks about."

"As a female, if I was interviewed by a man, I got the job…interviewed by a woman? I wouldn’t. During my ‘not sure what I’m doing with my life phase’ I went through a lot of jobs and really did test out this theory."

10. Interacting with kids

"I think for men, interact with children in a completely normal way. If an ugly guy tries to interact with a child, they're seen as a creepy pedo."

"Divorced dad here. When my kids were very young, I would often take them to parks on weekday mornings during my visitation (my ex would never allow me in whatever house she was living in, due to distance it wasn't just weekends) to play because they usually weren't very full or overcrowded. The first year I would often, but not always, get the stink-eye or otherwise be watched closely by other moms that were there, which was uncomfortable. I hit the gym and diet and lost over 40 pounds and gained a 4-pack that winter as part of channeling my post-divorce energies into something productive. The next summer, the reactions I got taking my kids to the parks was much better. Not perfect, but noticeably more favorable."


handomse man, male model, curly hair, good-looking man, man smilingA man sitting on a mountaintop.via Canva/Photos

11. Hot gay guys can do anything

"In the gay community, hot guys can do or say literally anything they want, even with an absolutely nasty personality, and they’ll still have a whole group of starry-eyed guys fawning over them. If you’re average—or God forbid, not even average—you’re either treated like you’re invisible (if you’re lucky), or treated like garbage (which is usually the case), regardless of anything else you may have going for you. Don’t even get me started on the complicated race and class strata enforced on top of all this. Nobody really talks about it, but it’s the reason I sort of scoff/laugh anytime some activist says the community is 'supportive.' I mean it is, if you’re a hot, rich white guy."

12. Don't have to work as hard

"Getting noticed quickly and hence promotions quickly. I've realized it's easier to climb the corporate ladder being attractive and lazy than ugly and hardworking."

13. You get the deal

"Haggling for price reductions on anything. I seriously had a friend who got discounted gas at the gas station from the owner's son. She was hot with annoying baby voice and played dumb even with her phd and it almost always worked."

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Starbucks' social media team sets an important tone addressing racial bias.

"We cannot deny that this is a race issue."

On April 12, two black men were arrested while waiting for their friend at a Starbucks in Philadelphia. Their crime? Waiting for a friend, apparently.

The incident, caught on film, shows the two men being placed in handcuffs by police officers while confused customers tried to ask what exactly they had done wrong. The incident sparked a lot of justifiable anger and resulted in an apology from both Starbucks, and the Philadelphia police chief, a few days later.

At NBC, writer Elon James White shared an "uncomfortable truth for white America" about the incident.

"While this incident went viral, it is only remarkable because of how unremarkable it actually is," he wrote, highlighting another Starbucks video from California showing a black man being denied access to a store's restroom, while a white man was allowed in without scrutiny.

People protesting at the Starbucks where the two men were arrested. Photo by Mark Makela/Getty Images.

Starbucks announced plans to close all 8,000 of the company's corporate owned stores on May 29 for mandatory racial-bias training.

In a statement posted to Facebook, the company explained they were working with well-established civil rights advocates and anti-racism organizations to develop a curriculum for its 175,000 employees. The plan has gotten some majorly mixed reactions, ranging from people arguing that the Philadelphia location and police did nothing wrong, to those who think this is an important step in addressing the issue, to people who believe this is simply too little, too late.

All screenshots are from Starbucks/Facebook.

Whether the training itself will be considered a success remains to be seen. Still, the company's responses on social media have an important lesson for us all.

A lot of the time, when a company finds itself in the midst of a public relations disaster, their social media teams will come up with a few canned statements to respond to criticism on social media. Starbucks took a different approach — and has been offering personal replies to dozens of people.

Responding to criticism arguing that the Philadelphia incident was just a few bad apples, the company replied, "Because systemic racism and bias is bigger than one partner, one store or one company. We are shutting our stores for this training because we recognize that we have the responsibility to be part of the solution."

Others lamented the thought of going without their coffee for an afternoon, saying that the company's response was overblown. To that, Starbucks owned up to its less than stellar history, writing, "There are countless examples of implicit bias resulting in discrimination against people of color, both inside and outside our stores," and explaining that they have a responsibility to act.

"There was no reason for the police to be called to our Philadelphia store," they wrote to another commenter.

Another commenter used this as an opportunity to highlight legitimate grievances people and communities of color might have with law enforcement. The company responded by saying there are plans to meet with Philadelphia government and law enforcement officials to ensure this doesn't happen again. While it's not a national solution, it is something.

When someone pointed out that it shouldn't have taken a viral video for the company to get serious about fighting racial bias, Starbucks responded that the program rolling out May 29 will become part of new employee onboarding moving forward.

"Maybe train your employees on how to deal with loitering in general and not make it a color issue?" wrote another commenter. The company responded, "We cannot deny this is a race issue, which is why we are implementing this training."

Generally speaking, people should avoid calling the police in all but the most extreme cases, and Starbucks made its position on that clear in one of the responses, writing, "While there are situations where a call to police is justified (such as violence or aggressive behavior), this was not one of them."

The company was rightly wary of accepting praise for doing something it should have been doing all along. "We hope this proves to be an impactful step — one of many we know we have to take."

Yes, the manager who called the police has been fired.

Racism and unconscious biases are very real, and we'd all benefit from taking a step back and examining our own.

If one good thing comes out of what happened in Philadelphia, it's the chance for those who are white — and can't possibly know what it's like to be made to feel unwelcome in public spaces or to have our existence treated as automatically criminal on the basis of our skin color — to see the "uncomfortable truth" James mentioned in his article. This isn't a one-off incident, and it's not limited to just Starbucks. This is an everyday reality for many people of color. It's on all of us to push for a better world and to work to be our best selves.

What happened to those two men should never happen again. It almost certainly will, but it shouldn't. Take a page out of the Starbucks social media team's playbook and recognize this is a cultural problem that we have a responsibility to address — and then hold yourself accountable for your actions.

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9 simple ways to talk to kids about race that can help make the world kinder.

Administrators at Fox Chapel Middle School in Spring Hill, Florida, recently fired a teacher who gave her sixth graders an assignment asking them to consider how "comfortable" they would be in the company of various people. Some of the 41 scenarios identified these "others" in terms of race, ethnicity, nationality, or religion.

For example:

"Your new roommate is a Palestinian and Muslim."

"A group of young black men are walking toward you on the street."

"The young man sitting next to you on the airplane is an Arab."

"Your new suite mates are Mexican."

"Your assigned lab partner is a fundamentalist Christian."

Many Fox Hill students and parents were upset. "They’re kids. Let kids be kids. Why are they asking kids these questions?" one mother to a seventh-grade student wondered. "I just don’t think it’s something that needs to be brought in school." Another parent said, "I just think that sometimes kids are just too young to start that at this age, and in school."

Such sentiments are familiar — and deeply misguided.

In the United States, a lot of us believe that children, especially white children, are racial innocents — completely naive, curiously fragile about the realities of race, or both.

Image via iStock.

The truth is that well before their teen years, the majority of children are well aware of prevailing biases, and most kids of all racial stripes have taken on a bunch of their own.

Researchers have been studying the development of racial and ethnic biases in children for a long time, and we know quite a bit. We know that within a few months of birth, babies prefer own-race faces, probably because most are surrounded by people who look like them. Sometime during the preschool years, however, this relatively innocent pull toward the familiar morphs into something else.

By age 5, black and Hispanic children show no preference toward their own group compared to whites. On the other hand, white kids remain strongly biased in favor of whiteness. By the start of kindergarten, "children begin to show many of the same implicit racial attitudes that adults in our culture hold. Children have already learned to associate some groups with higher status, or more positive value, than others."

So, in reference to the doubtlessly well-meaning mom quoted earlier, the crucial question isn’t "Why bring issues of racial, ethnic, religious, and other kinds of bias into our schools?" It’s "How do we constructively engage the harmful biases we know pervade our schools and just about everywhere else? And what can we do to shape our children’s racial attitudes before and as they emerge?"

In that regard, research and experience offer some promising guidance to parents, guardians, teachers, and all of us who care for or about children.

These guidelines were developed by members of the Embrace Race team.

1. Start early.

Let your child know that it’s perfectly OK to notice skin color and talk about race. Encourage them to ask questions, share observations and experiences, and be respectfully curious about race.

2. Realize you are a role model to your child.

What you say is important, but what you do — how diverse your circle of friends is, for example — will probably have an even bigger impact on your child. If they don't attend a diverse school, consider enrolling them in activities such as sports leagues that are diverse (if you’re able). Choose books, toys, and movies that include people of different races and ethnicities. Visit museums with exhibits about a range of cultures and religions.

3. Let your child see you face your own biases.

We’re less likely to pass on the biases we identify and work to overcome. Give your child an example of a bias — racial or otherwise — that you hold or have held. Share with your child things you do to confront and overcome that bias.

4. Know and love who you are.

Talk about the histories and experiences of the racial, ethnic, and cultural groups you and your family strongly identify with. Talk about their contributions and acknowledge the less flattering parts of those histories as well. Tell stories about the challenges your family  —  your child’s parents, aunts and uncles, grandparents, and great grandparents — have faced and overcome.

5. Develop racial cultural literacy by learning about and respecting others.

Study and talk about the histories and experiences of groups we call African-Americans, Latinos, Asian Americans, Native Americans, and whites, among others. Be sure your child understands that every racial and ethnic group includes people who believe different things and behave in different ways. There is more diversity within racial groups than across them.

6. Be honest with your child, in age-appropriate ways, about bigotry and oppression.

Children are amazing at noticing patterns, including racial patterns (who lives in their neighborhood versus their friends’ neighborhoods, for example). Help them make sense of those patterns, and recognize that bigotry and oppression are sometimes a big part of those explanations. Be sure your child knows that the struggle for racial fairness is still happening and that your family can take part in that struggle.

7. "Lift up the freedom fighters:" Tell stories of resistance and resilience.

Every big story of racial oppression is also a story about people fighting back and "speaking truth to power." Teach your child those parts of the story too. Include women, children, and young adults among the "freedom fighters" in the stories you tell.

8. Teach your children to be "upstanders" for racial justice.

Help your child understand what it means to be — and how to be — a change agent. Whenever possible, connect the conversations you're having to the change you and your child want to see and to ways to bring about that change.

9. Plan for a marathon, not a sprint.

Make race talks with your child routine. Race is a topic you should plan to revisit again and again in many different ways over time. It’s OK to say, "I’m not sure" or "Let’s come back to that later, OK?" But then be sure to come back to it.

This story first appeared on Embrace Race and is used here with permission.

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Designing costumes for Lady Gaga didn't lead to this artist's big break. A website did.

'For someone who's part of a marginalized community, I feel like I'm finally being seen.'

Artist Fin Lee was living the not-so-glamorous freelance life, when they got the gig of a lifetime.

In fact, if you watched the 2016 Grammys, you probably saw their work. They designed and illustrated the costumes Lady Gaga's backup dancers wore during her tribute to David Bowie.

After years of struggling to catch a big break, Lee (artist name: Lostboy), who identifies as queer and uses they/them pronouns, finally got a foot in the door.

Lee's artwork in the style of Egon Shiele (Bowie's artist icon), as well as Bowie's actual hands on jumpsuits for the dancers. Image used with permission.

You'd think designing costumes for Lady Gaga would be a career-changing milestone. But that's not how things went for Lee.

Lee continued to get the occasional illustrator job, but still had to work as a barista to make ends meet. Occasionally, they'd be in the running for a big, exciting gig again, only to watch as someone else got the job instead. Lee noticed a troubling and frustrating pattern to who that "someone else" often was. Though not always the same person, these artists had a few traits in common — namely, they were male, and often white, straight, and cisgender too.

"I think the way our society is — we’re used to seeing a certain type of person in a certain type of field," Lee explains.

By Lostboy. Used with permission.

Employers or potential employers often aren't aware they might have subconscious biases influencing their hiring process, but the data doesn't lie. This is a problem.

According to a study recently published in the American Sociological Review, white men are more than three times as likely to get called in for a job interview than a woman with the same qualifications. And that discrimination gets exponentially worse for transgender women.

So where do you go to find work when a potential employer's subconscious biases about who you are prevents them from seeing the good work you're capable of doing?

The turning point in Lee's career came when they became an early user of a new website called Women Who Draw.

Women Who Draw is a database of artists designed to give marginalized artists visibility and a deeper sense of community in a competitive field. The website specifies that it is "trans-inclusive and includes women, trans and gender non-conforming illustrators."

Photo via Women Who Draw. Used with permission

Lee was brought on as a beta tester by one of the site's creators, San Francisco illustrator Wendy MacNaughton. MacNaughton, together with fellow creator and artist Julia Rothman, hoped Lee, a queer Asian artist, could offer advice on how they wanted to see the site operate.

Lee happily obliged. "It's the first of it’s kind that I’ve seen where it’s so inclusive," Lee says.

By Annelise Capossela. Used with permission.

“Women [on the site] can choose how they want to identify in terms of their race, orientation, location, religion," says MacNaughton. "There are many other ways people identify, but those four seemed very relevant in terms of visibility, and useful for art directors when they’re looking for specific people who might have specific experience, expertise, or perspective."

For employers who want to hire more diverse illustrators, Women Who Draw is an incredibly helpful resource.

Heather Vaughan, an artist and art director for a gaming company, explained over email that "[Women Who Draw] actually came at a really great time. She says she was "specifically looking to find female artists to work with ... since women in games are an even smaller group."

By Heather Vaughan. Used with permission.

Today, Women Who Draw features over 700 artists, with portfolios that are an incredible representation of diversity, both artistically and demographically. Gracia Lam, who is Asian-Canadian and identifies as gay, says that Women Who Draw makes it so much easier for clients to choose illustrators who can help tell "fuller, more well rounded" stories.

By Gracia Lam. Used with permission.

Similarly, Annelise Capossela, a Brooklyn-based illustrator, says that Women Who Draw helps art directors who are looking to diversify their hiring pool and make the conscious choice to search for illustrators and artists who have "uniquely personal insight into certain topics or experiences."

By Annelise Capossela. Used with permission.

Shortly after Women Who Draw's public launch in December 2016, Lee got their first big editorial job.

On Christmas Day, Lee got a call from Rodrigo Honeywell, the Art Director of the travel section at the New York Times, offering Lee an opportunity to illustrate the feature image for an upcoming article.

Honeywell found Lee through Women Who Draw's database.

By Lostboy. Used with permission.

Lee has also seen a major uptick in visits to their website since WWD's database launched — over 600 hits on the first day alone.

Lee has come a long way in the year since the 2016 Grammys. But it was Women Who Draw that really helped them open the door to a full-time career as an artist.

Thanks to all the exposure from Women Who Draw, Lee now has a full-time job with an illustration agency that represents artists. They no longer have to serve coffee.

While that's great news for them, equal opportunities for artists like Lee may diminish under a Trump administration. There couldn't be a better time for a site like this.

"For someone who's part of a marginalized community, I feel like I'm finally being seen," Lee says.

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