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Health

Woman shares private before-and-after pictures to reassure people that plastic surgery is OK

“Get it done,” she urged. “Get work done.”

fluently forward, plastic surgery, tiktok

Woman shares her positive experience with plastic surgery.

There is an age-old debate over whether someone should get plastic surgery to overcome their insecurities or learn how to accept them by talking to a therapist.

Plastic Surgeon Dr. Chales T. Slack says that plastic surgery can’t solve all someone’s problems. “Perkier breasts won’t save your marriage,” Parker wrote on his blog. “A new nose won’t guarantee a promotion. And while cosmetic surgery can give you a boost of confidence and add to your self-esteem, it cannot fix big underlying psychological issues.”

Studies show that for some plastic surgery can be a big boost to their self-esteem, while for others, such as those with body dysmorphic disorder, it can lead them to feel even worse about themselves.


Over recent years, public opinion surrounding plastic surgery has changed. Previously, many thought cosmetic treatments were vain, superficial, or only for people with low self-esteem. But these days, more see it as self-care in a world where people feel judged for their appearance.

Since the pandemic, there has been a huge surge in people getting plastic surgery. Especially among those younger than 45. At least 30% of plastic surgeons say their business has at least doubled since 2020.

Shannon McNamara, the host of the Fluently Forward podcast, recently reshared a video of her getting a nose job to inspire others who are feeling insecure about their body to get work done.

@fluentlyforward

Throwback post #nosejob #rhinoplasty #beforeandafter

“I’m short, I’m petite, and I just feel like my nose stuck out so much,” she said in the video. “I feel like anyone else who doesn’t like their nose, you will know the feeling. I don’t even have to describe it; it was all I thought about.”

McNamara believes the pain of being uncomfortable with her nose went way beyond the satisfaction she could ever feel by having a “natural” body.

“I thought about my nose every day,” she said. She then shared a memory of when she was in the 7th garage and went out of her way to sit in an odd position in class to ensure her crush couldn’t see her profile.

She also spoke out against those who said she shouldn’t get plastic surgery because she was “so beautiful that she didn’t need” it. McNamara believes cosmetic surgery can be necessary when extreme feelings of insecurity cause stress hormones to overtake your body. “It’s just sending cortisol through their system,” she argues.

“Get it done,” she urged. “Get work done.”


Five years after the surgery, McNamara is satisfied with her new look. "I don't give a rat's A about my nose,” McNamara said. “I just don't think about it, and that was what I wanted. And I think everyone who says that they got their nose done, the only thing they regret is not doing it sooner."

McNamara’s video is a strong case for those who want to remove the stigma surrounding plastic surgery. However, the research shows that the answer should differ for everyone, depending on the root causes of their insecurities. "The whole idea of aesthetic surgery being superficial, it's just not," Dr. Adam Kulker tells InStyle. "People tend to be very judgmental, but it's so much more important to focus on the individual and their self-perception."


Family

Married couple swears by the '3-Hour Night' as a relationship game changer

"If you’re stuck in a rut with your evenings — try this!"

@racheleehiggins/TikTok

Want out of a relationship rut? The Three hour night might be the perfect solution.

Almost every long term relationship suffers from a rut eventually. That goes especially for married partners who become parents and have the added responsibility of raising kids. Maintaining a connection is hard enough in this busy, fast paced world. Top it off with making sure kids are awake, dressed, entertained, well fed, oh yeah, and alive…and you best believe all you have energy for at the end of the day is sitting on the couch barely making it through one episode on Netflix.

And yet, we know how important it is to maintain a connection with our spouses. Many of us just don’t know how to make that happen while juggling a million other things.

According to one mom, a “three-hour night” could be just the thing to tick off multiple boxes on the to-do list while rekindling romance at the same time. Talk about the ultimate marriage hack.

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Health

Relationship expert shares her advice on how to 'stop an argument in its tracks'

She has the perfect question to ask once your partner gets defensive.

Therapist Lauren Consul has one trick to stop arguments before they begin.

Arguments start to take off when one partner begins to get defensive. So, therapist Lauren Consul shared her relationship-saving tip to "stop an argument in its tracks" when one partner goes into self-preservation mode.

Lauren Consul is a couples and sex therapist who’s developed a following of nearly 160,000 people on TikTok and has received over 5.4 million likes. She is an infidelity expert and hosts retreats to help people "survive and thrive" after one partner has strayed.

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Pop Culture

Here’s a paycheck for a McDonald’s worker. And here's my jaw dropping to the floor.

So we've all heard the numbers, but what does that mean in reality? Here's one year's wages — yes, *full-time* wages. Woo.

Making a little over 10,000 for a yearly salary.

I've written tons of things about minimum wage, backed up by fact-checkers and economists and scholarly studies. All of them point to raising the minimum wage as a solution to lifting people out of poverty and getting folks off of public assistance. It's slowly happening, and there's much more to be done.

But when it comes right down to it, where the rubber meets the road is what it means for everyday workers who have to live with those wages. I honestly don't know how they do it.

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Woman refuses to change seats for mom and kids

Traveling with preteens and teens is a breeze in comparison to traveling with little ones but as a parent you still want to sit near your kiddos in case they need you for anything. If you've traveled on an airline in the last several years, you know it's much cheaper to chose the basic seats in the main cabin.

There's nothing different about these particular seats other than the airline sort of randomly selects your seat and if you're traveling alone, that's really not a bad deal. The risk gets to be a little higher if you're traveling with a party that you'd like to keep together - like your children. One mom took the risk and banked on a stranger accommodating...that's not quite how it played out.

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Modern Families

Mom shocked when boomer mother-in-law refuses to be called grandma and demands royal title

Many of the older generation refuse to be known as “grandma” or “grandpa.”

via Eviekizmet/TikTok and RDNE Stock project/Pexels

This mother-in-law will not be called "grandma."

A TikToker’s story about the grandiose title her mother-in-law chose instead of grandma is an excellent example of the growing trend of baby boomer grandparents rejecting their traditional titles.

A new mother who goes by the name EvieKizmet on the platform shared the story on January 6 and it received nearly 2 million views.

It all started when she and her husband asked her mother-in-law to choose the name she would use as a grandparent. Using a fake name as an example, she said that her mother-in-law chose “Mama Smith” and that didn't sit well with the mother. “Because realistically, a child is not going to call you by 2 names and it's going to be shortened to Mama. I'm a mama. Not you," she said.

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Mental Health

Man receives phone call from deceased father, proving that grief is like glitter

"Grief is like glitter. You never know when it's going to show up sometimes."

Man's phone call from deceased dad is lesson on grief

Grief is such a strong emotion that most people don't exit this earth having skipped the experience. When grieving the loss of a loved one in the early days, the grief can be so strong that it feels like physical pain. You may start to believe that you've cried so much that there must be something medically wrong with you for your body to still be producing tears. There's no placating cliché about grief that can make the early moments of it more tolerable.

But as people move past the active grieving stage, it contorts itself into something more tolerable that allows you to continue daily obligations before it changes again. Once years pass, grief becomes sort of like a silent passenger holding a jack-in-the-box. You find yourself having full on belly laughs again, feeling quite normal when suddenly out pops that dang clown from the depths of the box.

One man took to his TikTok account, dadchats, to share his experience with a surprise moment of grief for his father that passed away three years prior. It's the perfect depiction of the realities of grieving a profound loss.


"Last night my dead father called me on his cellphone," he starts the video. "It's 9:30 p.m. and I'm watching the Packers vs Taylor Swift game when all of a sudden my phone goes off and for the past five months if I get a call that late at night it's either about a vehicle warranty or it's about getting more printer ink."

The grieving son jokes about not having a printer before explaining how his deceased father called him. Turns out, it wasn't his father, likely much to is relief and simultaneous disappointment. The call was from his mother who never stopped paying for his father's phone unbeknownst to the man picking his heart up off of the floor after seeing "dad" pop up on his phone screen. He explains that his mother only ever calls him from her home phone so this call was sort of a jump scare of the worst kind.

@dadchats

Grief still knows my number

The man got emotional talking about the deep yearning you feel when missing a parent who has passed away. He revealed that his dad dying was a fear he had since childhood due to how old his father was when he was born so he stocked up on voicemails to avoid forgetting his dad's voice. After a few more tear filled moments, the grieving son gives a bit of advice.

"If you're struggling, especially just out of the blue, that's ok, that happens. That's normal, just sit in it. Grieve with it, feel it. It doesn't go away I don't think, it certainly hasn't for me, it still feels as fresh today as it did three years ago."

Viewers of his heartfelt video flocked to the comments to leave words of encouragement and to detail their own experiences with grief. It was truly a moment of what community can look like online.

"Your[sic] absolutely right that the first thing you forget is the sound of their voice! I so badly wish I could still hear the sound of my mom's voice," one person writes.

"Hits home! I called my dad every night for years and kept picking up the phone for months only to remember he won't answer," another admits.

"Grief is like glitter. You never know when it's going to show up, sometimes," someone relates.

That commenter is right, grief is like glitter. No matter how long ago you handled glitter you'll still find little sparkly flecks of it every where you go.