+
upworthy
Family

Stay-at-home mom shares her life 'without the filters' and parents everywhere can relate

"Let me walk around my house and make you feel better about yours."

emily feret, tiktok moms, mom influencers

Emily Feret wants to "normalize being normal."

In the age of social media, it’s easy for moms to feel bad about themselves. Given the “positivity bias” of social media, parents are much more likely to share idealized pictures of their families that make everyone else feel like they’re the only ones who don’t have it together.

A study published in “Computers in Human Behavior” found that being confronted with “idealized motherhood” can increase anxiety and put unnecessary pressure on your mental health.


“And interestingly, it didn’t matter if the idealized portrayal was from a social media influencer [a “mommy influencer”] or an average Instagram user [an “everyday mom”],” the study’s author Dr. Ciera E. Kirkpatrick writes.

“Idealized content from either of these sources had the same negative effect—indicating that anyone putting out idealized motherhood content like this can have harmful effects on new moms. It’s not just a problem with influencers,” Dr. Kirkpatrick continues.

One stay-at-home mom is doing her best to make everyone feel better about the chaos that comes with having children. TikTokker Emily Feret has earned over 1 million followers on the platform because of her videos that aim to "normalize being normal."

In one of her posts, she shows you what a “normal” person's fridge looks like. "You guys love these, I like to normalize being normal, life without the filter. So I'm gonna show you my fridge so you can feel better about yours,” Feret says in the video.

@emilyjeanne333

THE FRIDGE #WorthTheWait #normalizechaos #normalizenormal #messyhouse #fridgetour #normal #nofilter #pinterestmom #hotmessmom

In another video, she takes a walk through her house, "so you can feel better about yours." On her journey, she encounters a washing machine that doesn't work quite right, a bed that isn't made properly and a massive stack of toilet paper she keeps in her hallway.

@emilyjeanne333

Reply to @magickaldust normalizing normalcy #normalizechaos #normalizenormal #normalizenormalcy #messyhouse #hotmessmom #nofilter #fyp

Feret also provides support for mothers who feel overwhelmed.

“The mess isn’t going to go anywhere. You have young kids. You’re at home all the time. You’re living in your home. It’s going to look lived-in, and that’s okay,” she said. “Your kids are little. Enjoy them. Love them.”

“I want you to know that you’re doing enough by doing exactly what you’re doing right now,” she added.

@emilyjeanne333

#stitch with @marandaarbo I don’t know you but I see you and I love you. Breathe mama #breatheinbreatheout #nornalizechaos #nornalizemess

Feret told Parents what inspired her to share her home life on TikTok.

"I was watching all these videos and seeing all these pictures on social media of these picture-perfect houses and 'filtered lives,' and it was making me feel bad about my life," Feret told Parents. "I was not seeing any houses or moms that looked like me and my life. I wanted to show how my life is not at all like that and that you can be 'normal' and be doing a wonderful job even if your house is a mess and your kids are driving you crazy."

Feret’s videos are clearly resonating with parents because she’s had over 38 million likes on TikTok. She can’t believe the success that she’s had being “normal” but is happy she can help mothers like herself.

“All I have ever wanted to do is to help other people. The response has been overwhelming. I have people sending me gifts and celebrities commenting on my posts. It’s incredibly surreal,” she told Motherly. “I wanted other moms, and really anyone out there, that if their life does not look like an Instagram post it doesn’t mean you aren’t doing well.”


Family

Dad takes 7-week paternity leave after his second child is born and is stunned by the results

"These past seven weeks really opened up my eyes on how the household has actually ran, and 110% of that is because of my wife."

@ustheremingtons/TikTok

There's a lot to be gleaned from this.

Participating in paternity leave offers fathers so much more than an opportunity to bond with their new kids. It also allows them to help around the house and take on domestic responsibilities that many new mothers have to face alone…while also tending to a newborn.

All in all, it enables couples to handle the daunting new chapter as a team, making it less stressful on both parties. Or at least equally stressful on both parties. Democracy!

TikTok creator and dad Caleb Remington, from the popular account @ustheremingtons, confesses that for baby number one, he wasn’t able to take a “single day of paternity leave.”

This time around, for baby number two, Remington had the privilege of taking seven weeks off (to be clear—his employer offered four weeks, and he used an additional three weeks of PTO).

The time off changed Remington’s entire outlook on parenting, and his insights are something all parents could probably use.

Keep ReadingShow less
Photo by Bambi Corro on Unsplash

Can flying to college twice a week really be cheaper than renting?

Some students choose to live at home while they go to college to save money on living expenses, but that's generally only an option for families who live in college towns or cities with large universities where a student can easily commute.

For University of British Columbia student Tim Chen, that "easy commute" is more than 400 miles each way.

Twice a week, Chen hops on a flight from his home city of Calgary, flies a little more than an hour to Vancouver to attend his classes, then flies back home the same night. And though it's hard to believe, this routine actually saves him approximately $1,000 a month.

Keep ReadingShow less

Christine Kesteloo has one big problem living on a cruise ship.

A lot of folks would love to trade lives with Christine Kesteloo. Her husband is the Chief Engineer on a cruise ship, so she gets to live on the boat pretty much for free as the “wife on board.” For Christine, life is a lot like living on a permanent vacation.

“I live on a cruise ship for half the year with my husband, and it's often as glamorous as it sounds,” she told Insider. “After all, I don't cook, clean, make my bed, do laundry or pay for food.“

Living an all-inclusive lifestyle seems like paradise, but it has some drawbacks. Having access to all-you-can-eat food all day long can really have an effect on one’s waistline. Kesteloo admits that living on a cruise ship takes a lot of self-discipline because the temptation is always right under her nose.

Keep ReadingShow less
Internet

Man goes out of his way to leave tip for a server after realizing he grabbed the wrong receipt

Instead of just brushing it off and moving on, the man wrote out a note explaining what happened with a sincere apology along with a $20 cash tip and delivered it to the restaurant.

Man goes out of his way to leave forgotten tip for server

Being in the service industry can be hard. People have to spend long hours on their feet, deal with repetitive movements that can create pain and sometimes interact with not so nice customers. When you rely on tips for survival on top of everything else, it can feel like a bit of a gut punch when someone decides not to leave you one despite how good your service was.

One customer must've realized the disappointment that can occur after not receiving a tip when serving tables because he went out of his way to give one. In a post shared on Reddit, a customer revealed in a letter that he realized he took the wrong receipt after leaving. Instead of taking the blank one, he took the merchant's copy which holds the tip amount and his signature.

The error was discovered when he was checking his bank account and saw the amount taken off of his card was not the amount he expected. That's when he decided to check the receipt from that day and saw the error.

Keep ReadingShow less

Tony Trapani discovers a letter his wife hid from him since 1959.

Tony Trapani and his wife were married for 50 years despite the heartache of being unable to have children. "She wanted children,” Trapani told Fox 17. "She couldn't have any. She tried and tried." Even though they endured the pain of infertility, Tony's love for his wife never wavered and he cherished every moment they spent together.

After his wife passed away when Tony was 81 years old, he undertook the heartbreaking task of sorting out all of her belongings. That’s when he stumbled upon a carefully concealed letter in a filing cabinet hidden for over half a century.

The letter was addressed to Tony and dated March 1959, but this was the first time he had seen it. His wife must have opened it, read it and hid it from him. The letter came from Shirley Childress, a woman Tony had once been close with before his marriage. She reached out, reminiscing about their past and revealing a secret that would change Tony's world forever.

Keep ReadingShow less
Science

Scientists have finally figured out how whales are able to 'sing' underwater

The physical mechanism they use has been a mystery until now.

Baleen whales include blue, humpback, gray, fin, sei, minke whales and more.

We've long known that baleen whales sing underwater and that males sing in tropical waters to attract females for mating. What we haven't known is how they're able to do it.

When humans make sound underwater, we expel air over through our vocal chords and the air we release rises to the surface as bubbles. But baleen whales don't have vocal chords, and they don't create bubbles when they vocalize. Toothed whales, such as sperm whales, beaked whales, dolphins and porpoises, have an organ in their nasal passages that allows them to vocalize, but baleen whales such as humpback, gray and blue whales don't.

Whales are notoriously difficult to study because of their size and the environment they require, which is why the mechanism behind whale song has remained a mystery for so long. It's not like scientists can just pluck a whale out of the ocean and stick it in an x-ray machine while it's singing to see what's happening inside its body to create the sound. Scientists had theories, but no one really knew how baleen whales sing.

Now, thanks to researchers at the University of Denmark, that mystery has been solved.

Keep ReadingShow less