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Men, this is what we need to learn about bromance (and how it could make us healthier).

Is anything better than a beautiful bromance?

"What?" GIF from "Sherlock."


You know, bros being bros with each other?

GIF from "Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers."

Love or hate the bro + romance portmanteau (and many people do have strong and valid feelings about its usage, not to mention the ways it's used as queerbaiting instead of actual LGBTQ representation), you've got to admit that close male friendships do sometimes seem as though they're reserved exclusively for male friends in TV shows and movies.

And don't get me wrong — bromances are fun to watch, but...

...as much as we love to see pairs of dude friends in our TV shows and movies, they may be becoming an endangered species here in the real world.

Though men desire friendship and affection, studies have shown that a lot of us are struggling to form lasting friendships with one another.

GIF from "Star Trek"/Omaze.

This struggle may be the result of one of the worst (and most pervasive) stereotypes: That men want to be alone.

"There's a stereotype of the lone male wolf," says Liz Kirby, one of the authors of a new study about male bonding, referencing the idea that guys are just naturally more isolated than women and don't need emotional support systems or aren't as biologically predisposed to having feelings.

It's the same stereotype that says that men don't need help dealing with day-to-day stress, that a guy shouldn't open up about his feelings, that he shouldn't complain or cry, and that when something bad happens men just deal with it.

Usually stoically.

"I'm not crying. It's raining on my face." — Men, probably. GIF from "Doctor Who."

"There's no reason that has to be the case," Kirby told me. "This idea that only women are the ones who need these social bonds or who can draw on these social bonds is really just not true."

Even science thinks bromances are awesome.

At least, so says the results of Kirby's new study from University of California Berkeley that involved male rats, bro-bonding, and good ol' brain chemicals.

Mmm ... brain chemicals. GIF from "Ratatouille."

The results of the study show that after male rats experienced mild stress, their levels of oxytocin (a hormone in the body which helps bond with others) went up. What's more, they found that male rats, when allowed to hang out with their male rat friends after those mildly stressful days, would get another hit of oxytocin as well.

"Bonding causes oxytocin and oxytocin causes bonding. It's a vicious love cycle," Kirby says. In essence, the study showed that male bonding time can be both a male body's natural response to stress and also one of the best treatments for it.

And guys, this isn't just metaphorically good for our hearts.

Studies show that deep male friendships may be good for our biological hearts too. Friendships can reduce stress, make us more resilient to future stresses, decrease our chances of getting depressed or anxious, and help keep us healthy. One study found that having a friend is as important to a person's health as quitting smoking.

"We do better, we live longer, we are healthier when we have friends," said Kirby.

The idea that deep friendships are good for you isn't exclusive to men, of course — all this stuff about hormones and friendships and health applies to lady-lady friendships, lady-dude friendships...

...human-Hulk friendships... GIF from "Avengers 2: Age of Ultron."

...or any types of friendship, really, but male-male bonds often get kind of ignored in these discussions.

This isn't just a feel-good message either — Kirby's research could one day help defeat one of today's greatest specters: post traumatic stress disorder.

Remember oxytocin, the friendship hormone? Kirby's researchers found something interesting about that. When stress is bad enough — like car-accident, PTSD-levels of bad — oxytocin levels don't go up the same way as when we experience mild, bad-day-at-the-office stress.

Instead, those traumatic experiences lower oxytocin in the body, and no oxytocin means no bonding instinct.

This might help explain why people sometimes retreat away from their support networks after experiencing a traumatic event or why they don't act a certain expected way. It could even help scientists figure out better ways to help anyone suffering from trauma.

This is what Kirby wants to study next — to see if her team can figure out a way to help refuel a person's oxytocin levels. If they can do that, she says, "we might be able to help people with PTSD come back out of their shell."

So, yes, men: Bromances have incredible power.

We should embrace friendships, not shy away from them. Spend some time with friends. Share your feelings. Ask for help. It's OK; it's even good for you!

Bromances can turn stress into friendship, help head off future stress, and can actually help us live longer.

Most hearteningly of all, they might be able to kill off that stupid lone-wolf stereotype that society tells us we need to fulfill — the part that can make you feel the most alone when you're struggling.

So, bros. Remember this the next time you have a bad day at the office.

Don't be this guy:

Be these guys:

You and everyone around you will be better off for it.

Nature

Pennsylvania home is the entrance to a cave that’s been closed for 70 years

You can only access the cave from the basement of the home and it’s open for business.

This Pennsylvania home is the entrance to a cave.

Have you ever seen something in a movie or online and thought, "That's totally fake," only to find out it's absolutely a real thing? That's sort of how this house in Pennsylvania comes across. It just seems too fantastical to be real, and yet somehow it actually exists.

The home sits between Greencastle and Mercersburg, Pennsylvania, and houses a pretty unique public secret. There's a cave in the basement. Not a man cave or a basement that makes you feel like you're in a cave, but an actual cave that you can't get to unless you go through the house.

Turns out the cave was discovered in the 1830s on the land of John Coffey, according to Uncovering PA, but the story of how it was found is unclear. People would climb down into the cave to explore occasionally until the land was leased about 100 years later and a small structure was built over the cave opening.

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via Pexels

A couple celebrates while packing their home.

One of the topics that we like to highlight on Upworthy is people who are redefining what it means to be in a relationship. Recently, we’ve shared the stories of platonic life partners, moms who work together as part of a “mommune” and a polyamorous family with four equally-committed parents.

A growing number of people are reevaluating traditional relationships and entering lifestyles that work for them instead of trying to fit into preexisting roles. It makes sense because the more lifestyle options that are available, the greater chance we have to be happy.

A recent trend in unconventional relationships is married couples "living apart together," or LATs as they are known among mental health professionals.

Actress Helena Bonham Carter and director Tim Burton, actress Gwyneth Paltrow and producer Brad Falchuk, and photographer Annie Leibovitz and activist Susan Sontag are all high-profile couples who’ve embraced the LAT lifestyle.

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Family

Professional tidier Marie Kondo says she's 'kind of given up' after having three kids

Hearing Kondo say, 'My home is messy,' is sparking joy for moms everywhere.

Marie Kondo playing with her daughters.

Marie Kondo's book, "The Life-Changing Art of Tidying Up," has repeatedly made huge waves around the world since it came out in 2010. From eliminating anything that didn't "spark joy" from your house to folding clothes into tiny rectangles and storing them vertically, the KonMari method of maintaining an organized home hit the mark for millions of people. The success of her book even led to two Netflix series.

It also sparked backlash from parents who insisted that keeping a tidy home with children was not so simple. It's one thing to get rid of an old sweater that no longer brings you joy. It's entirely another to toss an old, empty cereal box that sparks zero joy for you, but that your 2-year-old is inexplicably attached to.

To be fair, Kondo never forced her way into anyone's home and made them organize it her way. But also to be fair, she didn't have kids when she wrote her best-selling book on keeping a tidy home. The reality is that keeping a home organized and tidy with children living in it is a whole other ballgame, as Kondo has discovered now that she has three kids of her own.

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Pop Culture

YouTube star MrBeast sponsors 1,000 people's cataract surgery to help them see again

"I had never heard of MrBeast so I almost hung up. But gratefully did not hang up."

YouTube star sponsors 1,000 people's cataract surgery

Blindness touches people's lives around the world and YouTube star Jimmy Donaldson, more popularly known as MrBeast, is trying to do something about it. Donaldson made it his mission to help 1,000 people regain their eyesight with the help of Dr. Jeff Levenson, an ophthalmologist and surgeon in Jacksonville, Florida.

Levenson has been operating a program called "Gift of Sight" for over 20 years. The program provides free cataract surgery to uninsured people who are legally blind for free, so long as they meet certain criteria. Levenson had never heard of Donaldson, and he almost hung up on him when the YouTube star called to ask about a partnership.

"I had never heard of MrBeast so I almost hung up. But gratefully did not hang up," Levenson told CNN.

After figuring out that Donaldson was indeed a real person who wanted to help others, the duo called around the Jacksonville area to determine the people who needed help the most. They got their list of clients from free clinics and homeless shelters, which covered the United States portion of the surgeries.

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A mom makes sensory sand by putting Cheerios in a blender.

A parenting influencer who goes by the name @ellethevirgo on TikTok has shared a brilliant hack that can turn a simple box of Cheerios into a fun sensory sand experience. The great part is that the sand is edible, so you don’t have to worry if your child puts some in their mouth, which they will inevitably do.

The recipe for Cheerios sensory sand is pretty simple:

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Gaël Monfils makes tennis a must-see.

Tennis isn't always the most entertaining sport to watch, especially if you're not particularly interested in seeing a ball get slapped across a net at 1,000,000 mph approximately 17,000 times. You could probably get whiplash or eye strain if you focused too hard on it. While some people love the sport, others need a little more than grunts and sneaker sounds to capture their attention.

If you're in the group of people who need to be entertained, look no further than Gaël Monfils, a professional French tennis player that has earned the nickname, "The Entertainer." Monfils turned pro in 2004 and has multiple championship matches under his belt, and yet he still takes the time to be...extra while playing.

In a compilation video uploaded to TikTok, we see the 36-year-old tennis player dancing after hitting the ball across the net just out of his opponent's reach. But of course, he also doesn't hit the ball like your average player, either. In one part of the video, Monfils jumps up extremely high and bicycle kicks as he hits the ball with his tongue hanging out of his mouth.

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