Chechnya is still killing gay men. Now a prominent Russian singer may be dead.
Why aren't more people talking about this?
In August, Russian singer Zelimkhan Bakayev traveled from Moscow to Chechnya to celebrate his sister's wedding. Then, he vanished. His online activity came to a halt; his Instagram account was deactivated. With few options and even fewer answers, his mother called on Chechen leader Ramzan Kadyrov last month to provide clarity, desperate to know what had happened to her son.
How does a high-profile Russian singer simply ... disappear?
It's likely, officials believe, Bakayev was swept up in Chechnya's horrifying and ongoing anti-gay purge targeting queer men like him.
Missing Russian pop star Zelimkhan Bakayev reportedly a victim of Chechnya's anti-gay regime.… https://t.co/cS9rCO0VTM— Crack Magazine (@Crack Magazine) 1508788800
This past spring, Moscow newspaper Novaya Gazeta reported Chechen officials were arresting, torturing, and even murdering men believed to be gay or bisexual.
In undisclosed state prisons, officials were (and are likely continuing to) torture detainees, often pushing victims to provide information on other gay men in the region so other arrests could be made. Kadyrov reportedly set a deadline to "eliminate" Chechnya's gay and bisexual population by the start of Ramadan: May 26, 2017.
Chechen leader Ramzan Kadyrov. Photo by Alexander Nemenov/AFP/Getty Images.
Tragically, Bakayev may be among those killed.
While Chechen officials have denied the broad accusations about the purge, multiple human rights groups operating in or around the region — notably, the Russian LGBT Network and Amnesty International — claim the arrests and murders are happening and haven't stopped in the months following initial reports.
At a press conference on Oct. 16, Russian LGBT Network founder Igor Kochetkov told reporters his organization learned Bakayev's disappearance was linked to the anti-gay purge: "At the end of August, we received confirmation of our earlier presumption that Bakayev was detained by Chechen authorities due to suspicion of homosexuality."
YouTube videos uploaded after Bakayev's arrest make his disappearance particularly odd and alarming.
Following the singer's arrest in Chechnya's capital city of Grozny, bizarre YouTube videos — linked to a suspicious account that hasn't published any other content — were shared showing Bakayev alone in a room (aside from a person filming), listening to music and drinking energy drinks, Newsweek reported. The curtains on the windows had been pulled.
[rebelmouse-image 19532651 dam="1" original_size="931x472" caption="An image lifted from a suspicious YouTube video of Bakayev published on Sept. 24, 2017." expand=1]An image lifted from a suspicious YouTube video of Bakayev published on Sept. 24, 2017.
In the video, Bakayev tells viewers he's spending time enjoying himself in Germany. But viewers have pointed out the drinks in the video aren't available in Germany and the furniture spotted in the room is made by a Russian company. Had the videos been made to give false hope to the public of Bakayev's safety?
Now, friends are fearing the worst. NewNowNext reported on Oct. 20 that Bakayev has been murdered, pointing to an anonymous tip as its source. As Chechnya has no free press and victims are understandably fearful to go on record, information concerning the singer has been difficult to verify. (Upworthy has reached out to the Russian LGBT Network to learn more about the status of Bakayev's situation; this article may be updated.)
The world isn't paying enough attention to Chechnya's relentless anti-gay purge. But you can help change that.
Share this article with family and friends. Contact your representatives and demand that they speak up on the matter. Sign this petition by Amnesty International calling on authorities to investigate the situation and bring those accountable to justice. Call on President Donald Trump — who has yet to speak up on the matter — to do more in pressuring Russian President Vladimir Putin and Kadyrov to halt Chechnya's crackdown on queer men in the region.
We can't let this injustice continue.
Update (10/25/17): The Russian LGBT Network confirmed via email that Bakayev remains missing: "We know only that Zelim disappeared, and that the law enforcement agencies did not do anything to find him," a communications manager from the network explains. "We cannot confirm that he is dead."
Our mouths loves chips. Our bodies not so much.Photo by 
You can eat well without giving up sweets completely.Photo by 
12 non-threatening leadership strategies for women
We mustn't hurt a man's feelings.
Men and the feels.
Note: This an excerpt is from Sarah Cooper's book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings.
In this fast-paced business world, female leaders need to make sure they're not perceived as pushy, aggressive, or competent.
One way to do that is to alter your leadership style to account for the fragile male ego.
Should men accept powerful women and not feel threatened by them? Yes. Is that asking too much?
IS IT?
Sorry, I didn't mean to get aggressive there. Anyhoo, here are twelve non-threatening leadership strategies for women.
Encourage.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When setting a deadline, ask your coworker what he thinks of doing something, instead of just asking him to get it done. This makes him feel less like you're telling him what to do and more like you care about his opinions.
Sharing ideas.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When sharing your ideas, overconfidence is a killer. You don't want your male coworkers to think you're getting all uppity. Instead, downplay your ideas as just "thinking out loud," "throwing something out there," or sharing something "dumb," "random," or "crazy."
Email requests.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pepper your emails with exclamation marks and emojis so you don't come across as too clear or direct. Your lack of efficient communication will make you seem more approachable.
Idea sharing.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
If a male coworker steals your idea in a meeting, thank him for it. Give him kudos for how he explained your idea so clearly. And let's face it, no one might've ever heard it if he hadn't repeated it.
Sexism.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you hear a sexist comment, the awkward laugh is key. Practice your awkward laugh at home, with your friends and family, and in the mirror. Make sure you sound truly delighted even as your soul is dying inside.
Mansplain.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Men love explaining things. But when he's explaining something and you already know that, it might be tempting to say, "I already know that." Instead, have him explain it to you over and over again. It will make him feel useful and will give you some time to think about how to avoid him in the future.
Mistakes.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Pointing out a mistake is always risky so it's important to always apologize for noticing the mistake and then make sure that no one thinks you're too sure about it. People will appreciate your "hey what do I know?!" sensibilities.
Promotions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Asking your manager for a promotion could make you seem power- hungry, opportunistic, and transparent. Instead, ask a male coworker to vouch for you. Have your coworker tell your manager you'd be great for the role even though you don't really want it. This will make you more likely to actually get that promotion.
Rude.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Sometimes not everyone is properly introduced at the start of a meeting. Don't take it personally even if it happens to you all the time, and certainly don't stop the meeting from moving forward to introduce yourself. Sending a quick note afterward is the best way to introduce yourself without seeming too self-important.
Interruptions.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When you get interrupted, you might be tempted to just continue talking or even ask if you can finish what you were saying. This is treacherous territory. Instead, simply stop talking. The path of least resistance is silence.
Collaboration.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When collaborating with a man, type using only one finger. Skill and speed are very off-putting.
Disagreements.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
When all else fails, wear a mustache so everyone sees you as more man-like. This will cancel out any need to change your leadership style. In fact, you may even get a quick promotion!
In conclusion...
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
Many women have discovered the secret power of non-threatening leadership. We call it a "secret power" because no one else actually knows about it. We keep our power hidden within ourselves so that it doesn't frighten and intimidate others. That's what makes us the true unsung heroes of the corporate world.
About the Author: Sarah Cooper
Sarah Cooper is a writer, comedian, and author of 100 Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings. Her new book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings, is out now.
The comedic book cover.
With permission from Sarah Cooper.
A satirical take on what it's like to be a woman in the workplace, Cooper draws from her experience as a former executive in the world of tech (she's a former Googler and Yahooer). You can get the book here.
This article was originally published on March 25, 2019.