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People are sharing the adult problems that 'nobody prepared you for' and they're so true

Here are 21 of the most relatable.

being an adult, adult lessons, growing up
via PixaBay

Being an adult is tough.

Nothing can ever fully prepare you for being an adult. Once you leave childhood behind, the responsibilities, let-downs and setbacks come at you fast. It’s tiring and expensive, and there's no easy-to-follow roadmap for happiness and success. A Reddit user asked the online forum, “What’s an adult problem nobody prepared you for?” and there were a lot of profound answers that get to the heart of the disappointing side of being an adult.

One theme that ran through many responses is the feeling of being set adrift. When you’re a kid, the world is laid out as a series of accomplishments. You learn to walk, you figure out how to use the bathroom, you start school, you finish school, maybe you go to college, and so on.

However, once we’re out of the school system and out from under our parents’ roofs, there is a vast, complicated world out there and it takes a long time to learn how it works. The tough thing is that if you don’t get a good head start, you can spend the rest of your life playing catch-up.

Then, you hit middle age and realize that life is short and time is only moving faster.

Adulthood also blindsides a lot of people because we realize that many adults are simply children who grew older. The adult world is a lot more like high school than a teenager could ever imagine.

The Reddit thread may seem a bit depressing at first, but there are a lot of great lessons that younger people can take to heart. The posts will also make older people feel a lot better because they can totally relate.

Being an adult is hard, exhausting and expensive. But we’re all in this together and by sharing the lessons we’ve learned we can help lighten each other's load just a bit.

Here are 21 of the most powerful responses to the question: “What is an adult problem nobody prepared you for?”

1. Lack of purpose

"Lack of purpose. All your young life you are given purpose of passing exams and learning, then all of a sudden you are thrown into the world and told to find your own meaning," — Captain_Snow.

2. No bed time

"You can stay up as late as you want. But you shouldn't," — geek-fit

3. Friendships

"Where did all my friends go?" — I_Love_Small_Breasts

Most of them are at the same place as you are ... Probably wondering the same thing," — Blackdraon003

4. Bodily changes

"I'm closer to fifty than forty, would have been nice to be better prepared for some of the ways your body starts to change at this point that don't normally get talked about. For instance your teeth will start to shift from general aging of your gums," — dayburner.

5. People don't change

"Didnt know that other adults have the emotional intelligence of teenagers and its almost impossible to deal with logically," — Super-Progress-6386

6. Money

"$5K is a lot to owe, but not a lot to have," — Upper-Job5130

7. Our parents age, too

"Handling the decline and death of your parents," - Agave666

8. Free time

"Not having a lot of free-time or time by myself," — detective_kiara

9. No goals

"Not having a pre-defined goal once I was out of college. Growing up my goals were set for me: get through elementary school! then middle school! Then high school, and get into college and get a degree, then get a job, and then...? Vague "advance in your career, buy a house, find a spouse, have a kid or multiple, then retire." At 22 I had no idea how to break that down more granularly," — FreehandBirdlime

10. Constant upkeep

"Life is all about maintenance. Your body, your house, your relationships, everything requires constant never ending maintenance," — IHateEditedBGMusic

11. Exhaustion

"Being able to do so many things because I'm an adult but too tired to do any of them," — London82

12. Loneliness

"Being an adult feels extremely lonely," — Bluebloop0

13. Dinner

"Having to make dinner every. Fucking. Day," — EndlesslyUnfinished

14. Time changes

"The more life you’ve lived, the faster time seems to go," — FadedQuill

15. You're responsibile, even if you didn't mean it

"You are held to account for bad behaviour for which you are negligent even if you had no intention to cause harm. As a lawyer, I see this all the time. People don't think they're responsible for mistakes. You are," — grishamlaw

16. Work is like high school

"The intricacies of workplace politics," — Steve_Lobsen writes. "

"When you're in school, you think that you won't have to deal with gossiping and bullying once you leave school. Unfortunately, that is not true," — lady_laughs_too_much

17. Nowhere to turn

"How easy it is to feel stuck in a bad situation (job, relationship, etc) just because the cost and effort of getting out can seem daunting. And sometimes you just have to accept a figurative bowl full of shit because you can't afford to blow up your life," — movieguy95453

18. The happiness question

"Figuring out what makes you happy. Everyone keeps trying to get you to do things you're good at, or that makes you money, but never to pursue what you enjoy," — eternalwanderer5

19. Constant cleaning

"The kitchen is always dirty. You’ll clean it at least three times every day," — cewnc

20. Life costs money

"One adult problem nobody prepared me for is how expensive everything is. I always thought that as an adult I would be able to afford the things I wanted, but it turns out that's not always the case! I've had to learn how to budget and save up for the things I want, and it's been a difficult process," — Dull_Dog_8126

21. Keeping above water

"All of it together. I was relatively warned about how high rent is, car bills and repairs, how buying healthy food is expensive as hell but important for your health, how to exercise and save what you can, my parents did their best to fill in my knowledge about taxes and healthcare and insurance that my schooling missed, about driving and cleaning a household, about setting boundaries at work but working hard and getting ahead if you can, about charity and what it means to take care of a pet and others, about being a good partner if you were lucky enough to have one, about how dark and messed up the world is when you just read the news and what all that means to me and my community… I was reasonably warned about all of it.

"No one could have ever prepared me for how hard doing all of it at the same time and keeping your head above that water would actually be," — ThatNoNameWriter


This article originally appeared two years ago.

How can anyone get by on this?

I've written extensively about minimum wage, supported by fact-checkers, economists, and scholarly studies. All of them support raising the minimum wage as a solution to lifting people out of poverty and getting them off public assistance. It's slowly happening, and there's much more to be done.

But when it comes right down to it, where the rubber meets the road is what it means for everyday workers who have to live with those wages. I honestly don't know how they do it. Ask yourself: Could I live on this small of an hourly wage? I know what my answer is.

(And note that the minimum wage in many parts of the county is STILL $7.25, so it could be even less than this).

paychecks, McDonalds, corporate power, broken systemOne year of work at McDonalds grossed this worker $13,811.18.via JustFrugalMe/YouTube

The YouTube channel Just Frugal Me discussed the viral paycheck and noted there's absolutely nothing wrong with working at McDonald's. More than 2 million people in the U.S. alone work for the fast food giant. The worker's paycheck shows they put in 72 hours over the pay period, making $8.75 per hour. Before taxes, that's $631 for the week. Just Frugal Me's breakdown is even more eye-opening, breaking down this person's pay after taxes and weighing across average rent and utility costs. Spoiler Alert: the total costs for basic necessities far outweigh what this person is making even while working 12 hours per day. But they do make too much to qualify for Medicaid, meaning they will have to go out and buy their own health insurance.

mcdonald's, minimum wage, restaurants, fast food, burgers, big macA photo of a McDonald's in Hartford, CT. via Mike Mozart/Flickr

Even in states like California, where the state's $20 minimum wage ensures that people earn nearly three times as much as the federal minimum wage, which remains as low as when this paycheck first made the rounds nearly 10 years ago.

Still, even for a worker that maxed out at 40 hours per week and took zero vacation or sick time, that's only a little over $41,000 per year. That's barely half the median wage in the state of $78,000 and far below a sustainable living wage in cities like Los Angeles.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

The U.S. federal minimum wage is just $7.25 and hasn't been raised since 2009. In April 2025, the Raise the Wage Act of 2025 was introduced in the House of Representatives and U.S. Senate. The bill would increase the federal minimum wage to $17 an hour by 2030 and eliminate the subminimum wage for tipped workers and those with disabilities. But supporters should be cautious that it's unlikely to pass the Republican-controlled Congress.

If the Wage Act of 2025 were to pass, over $22 million workers would get a raise, which is 15% of the U.S. workforce. It would raise $70 billion for low-wage Americans, an increase of $3,200 per worker.

“No person working full-time in America should be living in poverty," Virginia Congressman Bobby Scott said in a statement. "The Raise the Wage Act will increase the pay and standard of living for nearly 22 million workers across this country. Raising the minimum wage is good for workers, good for business, and good for the economy. When we put money in the pockets of American workers, they will spend that money in their communities,”

This story originally appeared ten years ago. It has been updated to reflect new information.

via Artiquities/Wikimedia Commons and Beastie Boys/YouTube

Adam "MCA" Yauch and Adam "Ad-Rock" Horovitz.

The Beastie Boys are one of the most unique bands in the history of hip-hop and rock. They created a hybrid sound that mixed old-school hip-hop, hardcore punk, and buttery funk instrumentals that shouldn’t make sense together but still sound fresh to this day. They were also hilarious, as seen in their music video "Sabotage" where they dressed as ‘70s cops, and in their unhinged interviews where they never gave a straight answer.

Adam “Ad-Rock” Horovitz, Adam “MCA” Yauch, and Michael “Mike D” Diamond were able to create memorable music, groundbreaking videos, and great live performances because, at the band's root, was a great friendship forged in the hardcore punk record shops of the late ‘70s and early ‘80s New York City. Given their goofy, subversive image, it’s no surprise that they loved making each other laugh—and a story that Horovitz tells in the bonus material of 2020's Beastie Boys Story documentary proves that Yauch would go to the ends of the Earth to prank his friend.

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The story starts in 1992 when the Beasties were performing as part of their Check Your Head tour in San Francisco. After the show, Horovitz was approached by a “super creepy dude” backstage who insisted that he take his ring. To get out of the situation, Horovitz took it. Weeks later when he got home to New York, he found the ring in his bag and, fearing it had a “hex” on it, Horovitz placed it on a little shelf in his bedroom.

The next day, the band was on a train to Washington, D.C., and Horovitz found the ring in his bag again. He was sure he had left the ring at his home and, confused, he began to replay the situation in his head. "I stood up from my train seat and I told Mike, Adam, and everyone about the ring. They started making fun of me," Horovitz said. So, he took the ring and threw it to the other end of the train car. “And I moved on with my life,” Horovitz said.


Fifteen years later, in 2007, the band was on tour in Santiago, Chile. While leaving their hotel, Horovitz reached into his backpack, and there it was: THE RING. “I f****** froze, I ran down to the lobby in full panic mode and told everybody, ‘The ring, I got the ring!” Horovitz exclaimed. But the band didn’t seem to care."

“Stop doing this to me,” Horovitz told the ring as he stood before a fountain in front of the hotel. He threw the ring in the fountain, and the band left Chile. “The next night, we’re all on the side of the stage, ready to play a show, and Yauch pulls me aside: 'Hey man, I put the ring in your bag.'" Horovitz couldn’t believe his ears. In 1992, Yauch picked up the ring Horovitz had thrown across the train car and waited for the perfect time to slip it back into Horovitz’s bag.

Yauch had since brought the ring with him every time they went on tour and waited for the perfect time to “sneak it into" Horovitz's bag. Yauch wasn’t ever going to tell Horovitz it was him, but because he seemed so “genuinely freaked out,” he let him in on the joke.

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“Who has the prank stamina to hold it back for 15 years?” Horovitz asked the crowd. “I am not only impressed by this, but I am proud to have a friend with such practical and tactical joke skills. Thank you, Adam, for elevating the team that coach built around you.”

Adam Yauch passed away at the age of 47 in 2012 from cancer. After his passing, the band broke up, vowing to never play again without their founding member and friend.

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Van Gogh's Starry Night, 1889.

Vincent van Gogh never got to enjoy his own historic success as an artist (even though we've been able to imagine what that moment might have looked like). Van Gogh died in 1890 at the age of 37 in Auvers-sur-Oise, France after shooting himself in the chest with a revolver. It was a tragic end to a turbulent life marked by mental instability and severe self-doubt.

According to the Van Gogh Museum, in a letter to his brother Theo in 1890, just a couple of weeks before his death, Van Gogh wrote, "...my life, is attacked at the very root, my step also is faltering." The man was struggling and exhausted. The high standards he had set for himself and his art were taking a toll. He was unsure about his future and, up to this point, had not received much recognition for his work and thought himself a failure "as a man and as an artist."

His most well-known work, Starry Night, was famously painted while Van Gogh was staying in an asylum in France 1889 after he mutilated his ear during a psychotic episode. According to the Van Gogh Museum, though, this may not be the full story. While it is widely agreed that Van Gogh did in fact cut off his own ear, the museum notes that it was because of a fight between Van Gogh and Paul Gaugin, the artist he had been working for in Aries, that led to the violent explosion that highlighted his deteriorating mental state.

Vincent Van Gogh, artist, 19th century, famous artist, Starry NightVincent Van Gogh's Self-Portrait, 1889Image via Canva.

As one of the best known and most studied artists of the 19th century, Van Gogh's madness and how it influenced his work is not new information. But it turns out that those of us who have appreciated his work have been missing out on some critical details for more than 100 years—revealed in the 2010s thanks to the Hubble Space Telescope.

A video at the bottom of the page will explain everything, but before we get there, let's do some backstory:

We known Van Gogh was an artist—and a genius artist at that—but, it turns out, he was also scientist. Kind of.

Whether intentionally or not, fresh eyes have found that Van Gogh's art—aside from being breathtaking—also captures one of science and nature's most elusive concepts: Turbulence.

The concept of turbulence is hard to understand with math, but it turns out art makes it fairly easy to comprehend through depiction. So, what is turbulence?

According to Britannica, turbulence, or turbulent flow, is a concept of fluid dynamics in which a type of fluid flow (liquid or gas like air or water or air) undergoes an irregular fluctuation or energy cascade. In other words, the air or water swirls and eddies as it moves: big eddies make smaller eddies, and those make even smaller ones, and so on. Common examples of turbulent flow include blood flow in arteries, lava flow, atmosphere and ocean currents, and the flow in boat wakes or surrounding the tips of aircraft wings.

It looks like this:

figures, flow, turbulence, turbulent flow, science, movementTurbulent flow illustrated and animated.All Van Gogh GIFs via TED-Ed.

The thing is, scientists only started figuring this out pretty recently.

turbulence, turbulent flow, science, nature, researchAnimation of art referencing science.All Van Gogh GIFs via TED-Ed.

And yet, there was Mr. Vincent van Gogh, 100 years earlier in his asylum with a mutilated ear and able to accurately capture this turbulent flow in what would become his most famous work, Starry Night.

Starry Night, Van Gogh, turbulence, art, art captures scienceAnimated Starry NightAll Van Gogh GIFs via TED-Ed.

The folks who noticed Van Gogh's ability to capture turbulence checked to see whether other artists did the same. Most of the Impressionists achieved "luminance" with their art—a striking and lifelike depiction of light's effect on color. While impressive, they did not capture or depict turbulence the way Van Gogh did.

The Scream, Edvard Munch, art, popular art, history, painting An animated depiction of The Scream.All Van Gogh GIFs via TED-Ed.

Not even Edvard Munch's The Scream, with it's swirling color and movement, could recreate what Van Gogh had accomplished.

Even in his darkest time, Van Gogh was able to capture—with eerie accuracy—one of nature's most complex and confusing concepts 100 years before scientists had the technology to do so.

Who would have thought that the beauty Van Gogh captured was foreshadowing what scientists would observe in the real, natural world in a century's time? To learn even more, watch the TED-Ed video below:

- YouTubeyoutu.be

This article originally appeared twelve years ago. It has been updated.

Joy

French folks trying to pronounce 'tricky' English words is a delightful dive into linguistics

Who'd have thought "thorough" and "hedgehog" would be harder to say than "psychophysicotherapeutics"?

Parisians tried to say specific words in English to hilarious effect.

Our human family speaks thousands of languages, expressing thoughts, ideas, and feelings with different sounds that make it impossible to understand one another even when we're saying the exact same thing. Linguistic studies teach us about how languages developed, how they are structured, what makes them unique or interesting, and why certain things are harder to say in some languages than others.

We learn from infancy how to form the sounds of our native language with our mouths. Early language development impacts what muscles we use and in what way, which becomes super obvious when you try to learn a different language as an adult. Depending on your native language and the one you are trying to acquire, certain words and sound combinations can be super tricky to pronounce. Sometimes the mouth just won't do it, but it can be a whole lot of fun to see people try.

That's why a video from Frenchly of Parisians trying to pronounce certain words in English has garnered millions of views. French pronunciation is famously challenging, but the ability to speak French perfectly creates its own challenges with other language. Ever seen a native French speaker try to pronounce "squirrel"? How about "thorough"? These French speakers did their best, but even they had to laugh as they fumbled their way through saying these words.

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The most telling might be when "hedgehog" kept being pronounced "edge-ogg" and the woman who pronounced the "h" sound saying she felt like she was speaking German. Indeed, English has strong German roots, but most of us wouldn't necessarily think of the "h" sound as indicative of that fact.

Listening to these Parisians trying to overcome their French-speaking muscle training to pronounce these English words is as fun as watching Americans trying to pronounce tricky words in French. We're all in the same boat, battling our tongues as we try to overcome our mouths' resistance to making certain sounds and giggling over the inevitable flubs that come along with learning another language.

However, these kind of funny pronunciation mishaps aren't confined to different languages. Sometimes just having a specific accent can make certain things harder to say. Have you ever heard a Scottish person try to say "purple burglar alarm"? Hilarious.

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As one commenter wrote, "Definitely shows how different languages requires the difference in movement of the jaw, mouth and tongue to create words."

"It’s essentially like trying to go against deeply rooted muscle memory," added another.

Another shared, "I'm French and used to live in Australia for a while. On the first weeks my jaw hurt so bad, I was hoping nobody would talk to me for a few days so I could recover from muscle pain!"

Other commenters celebrated the humor of it all:

"Others: 'Skweerul!' 'Sqwarrel!' 'Skyrel!' that one guy: S Q U A R E F R I E N D."

"The confidence behind 'square friend' has me doubting my own native pronunciation."

"Okay, 'square friend' is just a better name for them. Let's change it."

squirrel, french, english, words, funny, gifBring It Reaction GIF by reactionseditorGiphy

"They asked him to say “lettuce”, says the entire menu of Subway. That’s a flex."

"'Hedgehog.' 'I'm pretty sure that's a city.' Best quote of all time."

"This is so endearing and fun. It just goes to show that none of us should feel silly learning a new language. Language, no matter what it is, is hard!"

"It brings me some strange comfort to know that French-speaking people feel the same way about English words as I, an English-speaking person, feel about French words."

"French lady: 'th-th-therouuw' Also French lady: 'Psychophysicotherapeutics.'"

"I can’t believe that 'psychophysicotherapeutics' was the only word she could pronounce."

(The psychophysiotheraputics pronunciation actually makes sense since the word is quite similar in French: psychophysicothérapeutique. Thank you Greek and Latin roots.)

And yes, there is a similar video of Americans trying to pronounce French words:

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It's a good reminder to be patient with each other and ourselves as we learn another language. It's not easy, and the more we can laugh at ourselves like these good-natured Parisians, the more enjoyable that learning process can be.

A man and woman have a heated argument.

In the heat of the moment, sometimes we can say things that we don't mean. Other times, we TOTALLY mean the things we say, but still shouldn't say them, especially to our partners. Romantic relationships can be tricky, rife with beautiful connections and memories—but equally fragile in terms of resentment, misunderstanding, and ego.

Mark Travers, Ph.D., is a psychologist and relationship therapist who has spent years studying what works and what doesn't in arguments. He notes that so often the cracks in a relationship don't appear out of nowhere. "More often than not," he writes for CNBC, "they crumble under the weight of small missteps that quietly accumulate—until they become too heavy to manage."

He shares that as he's worked with many couples, he sees people come in for therapy who cite the fighting itself as the reason they need counseling. But he's noticed that upon examination, it's what is said during those fights that can really be the final straw. One phrase, in particular, is especially toxic. "There’s ONE phrase I’ve seen come up in these exchanges that’s more damaging than you think: ‘Why can’t you be more like [insert other person’s name]?’"

It's the comparison part that's especially troubling and can often lead to the end of the relationship. "What couples fail to recognize is that the person named is actually irrelevant, whether it’s an ex, a best friend’s girlfriend, or even ‘how you used to be.’ The real message will always remain the same: ‘You’re not enough, and someone else—anyone else—could do a better job at being my partner.’"

This can cause massive insecurity in the partner, where they're always second-guessing if they're good enough or if they're replaceable. If instead of saying, "I feel frustrated when I don't feel heard," you instead say, "Why can't you be like Kevin's wife? She never creates drama," you might be permanently damaging the very fabric of your bond. Think of it like a shirt with a hole in it. You keep washing it, the hole gets bigger until it completely falls apart.

couples, love, arguments, relationships, therapyCouple in love, fighting and repeating the cycle. Giphy

Why do we sometimes do this? Travers posits that it's because we're scared to say how we really feel. The more unsteady or insecure we feel in a relationship, the less we communicate. This creates a cycle of misunderstandings. He cites a study that "examined the impact of intimacy, relational uncertainty, and a partner’s interference on the directness of communication about relational irritations." In summation, communication is the key to (hopefully) feeling secure and stable, which in turn, gives partners a jumping off point for success.


@stefanossifandos

Four things NOT to say in a relationship! ❌ #relationshipadvice #relationshiptips #relationships #fyp #foryou #CVSPaperlessChallenge

Good news: There are tools to learn how to avoid these relationship traps, and some of them simply require rephrasing toxic terms. He gives the example, "If you catch yourself about to say, for instance, 'Why can’t you be more like Alex? He never blows up over small things,' give these a try instead:

  • 'I know we both get frustrated sometimes, but it would mean a lot to me if we could speak to each other kindly, without yelling.'
  • 'It’s hard for me when our arguments escalate so fast. I’d love for us to work on staying grounded together during tough moments.'

There are many couples' counselors online who share other traps to avoid. Stef Anya, LMFT, shares on her YouTube channel, "10 Phrases to Avoid in Your Relationship."

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These include lines like "Here we go again," or "You always (do this)." Any hyperbolic "extreme phrasing" can lead the other person to shut down, and it hardly ever gets the results we're looking for.

Also, steer clear of big declarations like "We're done, it's over!" Sure, you might feel that in the moment, but is that what you really want? It can cause irreparable damage and most certainly increase insecurity. And another chestnut so many of us are guilty of saying? "Calm down." When has telling someone to relax ever made them relax? (Unless, I guess you're at a spa, and even then I personally tense up.)

Relationships take effort, and obviously they don't always work out. But if you're willing to communicate with respect and openness, you're halfway there.