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10 weirdly named natural places in America and the stories behind them.

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The Grand Canyon. The Rocky Mountains. The Great Lakes. Many of the names of our American natural wonders are ... a little on the nose.

To be fair, back in the day when people were exploring 3.8 million square miles of largely uncharted territory, literally circling the wagons to brainstorm the name of a random mountain or lake probably got old fast. “Well, they’re pretty rocky, ain’t they? Rocky Mountains — boom. Done.”

But in this vast, amazingly diverse land we call the United States, there are still lots of pretty damn strange names of natural features that might make you say, “Hm, maybe I should go to that pretty place with the funny name.”


As an avid hiker and fan of our national parks, here are a few of my favorite of those pretty places with funny names — and some that are still on my list of places to go.

1. Bumpass Hell, Lassen Volcanic National Park, California

Bumpus Hell: when the neighbor's hounds eat all your turkey.

GIF via "A Christmas Story."

Bumpass Hell, on the other hand, is something very different.

Bubbling mud pots. Colorful steaming pools. Overwhelming stench of rotten egg. Lassen Volcanic National Park in the northern Sierra Nevada is Yellowstone's lesser-known cousin. Its biggest area of thermal features has a name that would make Sir Mix-a-lot proud: Bumpass Hell.

It gets its moniker from Kendall Vanhook Bumpass, an ill-fated late-1800s settler who fell into one of its boiling mud pits, severely burning his leg, which is one way to enshrine your name in history, I guess.

Today, you can avoid Bumpass’ fate by exploring the stinky-but-surreal area from the safety of sturdy, carefully placed boardwalks.

2. Big Bone Lick State Park, Kentucky

Whoever decided to put a sign for this park on the freeway clearly didn't have the best interests of teenage boys in mind. We may never know how many ounces of Mountain Dew were lost to the limitless guffaws this name has caused over the years.

Putting aside the adolescent yuks, Big Bone Lick is still just a weird name. Contrary to how it sounds, this place was not named for licking any kind of bones. It’s the site of an ancient salt lick — mineral deposits where mammoths, mastodons, and other large animals fed and died, leaving their big bones for William Lewis (of Lewis and Clark fame) to dig up.

Ha-ha-ha, Big Bone Lick.

3. Unalaska Island, Alaska

Is this an oxymoron? Actually, no. Despite its name, this island is, in fact, in Alaska — in the 1,200-mile-long Aleutian archipelago, to be exact.

Unalaska doesn't mean un-Alaska — it's more along the lines of “near Alaska.” The word “Alaska” goes back to Russian colonial times, when it referred to the mainland of, yep, you guessed it: Alaska. “Unalaska” is thought to be a combination of Russian and the Aleut indigenous language meaning “near the mainland.” And while Unalaska may be hundreds of miles off the coast of mainland Alaska, that’s just a little jaunt in Alaska terms.

3. Grand Tetons, Wyoming

The Grand Teton mountains are just ridiculously beautiful.

Yeah. Photo via tpsdave/Pixabay.

Early French trappers thought so too. So much so that these wondrous peaks reminded them of other beautiful things from back home when they first laid eyes on them. Legend has it that these early Francophoners named the peaks Les Trois Tetons — The Three Teats (or The Three Breasts).

Devil's advocate: These dudes were probably super homesick and lonely, like ancient mariners who imagined mermaids on long voyages.

Or, they were just French.

4. Dolly Sods, West Virginia

Finally, a national park covered in neatly manicured Bermuda grass! ... OK, not quite.

The strange name derives from an 18th-century German homesteading family — the Dahles — and a local term for an open mountaintop meadow — a "sods." The wilderness area is also full of sphagnum (peat moss) bogs due to its unique terrain and ecosystem.

It's gorgeous to look at — just watch where you step.

5. Mount Fairweather, Alaska

This 15,325-foot peak that sits on the border between Alaska and British Columbia has “the unofficial distinction of the worst-named mountain on earth” — as it actually has terrible weather.

Margerie Glacier and Mount Fairweather during some fair weather. Image via Eric E Castro/Wikimedia Commons.

Its moniker wasn’t given ironically, though: Legendary explorer Capt. James Cook supposedly named Mount Fairweather from the comfort of his ship offshore in 1778 during a rare period of clear skies.

The rare badass who's climbed it would likely say otherwise.

6. Donner Lake and Donner Pass, California

They say fortune favors the bold. "They" are wrong, at least sometimes. Fortune certainly didn't favor the bold but ill-fated Donner Party in 1846.

California-bound, the Donner Party group of settlers gambled on a newly discovered shortcut through the Sierra Nevada, past what was then called Truckee Lake. They hit a wall of early snow at the pass and ended up stranded for months in the freezing cold. They soon ran out of food and, faced with starvation, eventually resorted to cannibalism. Rescuers finally reached the camp in late February, leading about half of the original 87 members of the party to safety.

Donner Lake from Donner Pass. Image via Frank Schulenburg/Wikimedia Commons.

Today, busy Interstate 80 traverses the pass between Sacramento and Reno. Take a moment on your drive to pull off at the gorgeous Donner Lake viewpoint, remember this grisly bit of history, and give thanks for your warm bed and three squares a day.

7. Pando, aka Trembling Giant, Utah

This natural feature is unique on this list: It’s a living thing — an 80,000-year-old living thing. Formerly thought to be largest living thing in the world (the actual largest living thing in the world is now thought to be a humongous fungus in Oregon), Pando is a massive grove of 47,000 quaking aspens in Utah that are all one life-form. The trees are genetically identical and all grow from the same root system. Wild.

Unfortunately, Pando isn’t doing so well. Overgrazing by deer and cattle is killing its young trees, which could lead to full collapse of the organism. Scientists, heroes that they are, are of course trying to save it.

8. Delmarva Peninsula

How do you name a peninsula shared between three different states? You combine their names, of course! The 170-mile-long Delmarva Peninsula, which forms the east side of the Chesapeake Bay, owes its name to the combination of Delaware, Maryland, and Virginia, all of which have a foothold on the landmass. Presumably, Virginia goes last because its sliver is the smallest. Hey, fair is fair.

Image via Planiglobe/Wikimedia Commons (altered).

9. Denali, Alaska

Denali. The stuff of legends. The highest peak in North America, at a staggering 20,310 feet.

Photo via skeeze/Pixabay.

Located in the eponymous national park in Alaska, this peak was recently in the news for a name change — or, more accurately, a name reversion. The word "Denali" means "the high one" in the local native Athabaskan language. What a perfect name, right? But as per usual, back in the day some greedy white dude mucked everything up by renaming it after newly elected President William McKinley, who these days is mostly known for being assassinated and succeeded by Teddy Roosevelt (sorry, Billy).

The national park was also called McKinley from 1917 to 1980. It was renamed Denali when it was combined with Denali National Monument. At that time, the Alaska state Board of Geographic Names also restored the mountain’s original name, but the U.S. Board on Geographic Names did not recognize it until President Obama put an end to all that last year, restoring it to its rightful name: Denali.

No word yet on whether President Trump will re-revert it to Mount McKinley. Or, knowing him, Mount Trump.

10. Glass Beach, Fort Bragg, California

Sometimes, one generation's trash makes another's paradise.

This beautiful beach is covered in litter. Seriously — it’s strewn with glass from a former city dump site. But the powerful California surf has shaped and polished millions of small shards into smooth pebbles, to colorful effect. (The red ones are old taillights.)

In a twist of irony, the glass at Glass Beach — which, again, is trash — is now protected by the California state parks as a “cultural feature,” which means you can’t remove any garbage from the beach.

Some of these places may sound made up, but they're very real, and they only begin to scratch the surface of what America has to offer.

If you're looking for a breath of fresh air and need something a little more novel than yet another trip to the Grand Canyon, give some of these breathtaking locales a try.

But a quick warning: Like many of Earth's greatest treasures, a few of these spots are in danger from climate change and other forms of human impact. (Glass Beach is basically made of garbage, for cryin' out loud.)

Visit them while you can — or, at the very least, let those catchy names be a constant reminder to always, always act in service of the planet.

Once a refugee seeking safety in the U.S., Anita Omary is using what she learned to help others thrive.
Pictured here: Anita Omary; her son, Osman; and Omary’s close friends
Pictured here: Anita Omary; her son, Osman; and Omary’s close friends
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In March 2023, after months of preparation and paperwork, Anita Omary arrived in the United States from her native Afghanistan to build a better life. Once she arrived in Connecticut, however, the experience was anything but easy.

“When I first arrived, everything felt so strange—the weather, the environment, the people,” Omary recalled. Omary had not only left behind her extended family and friends in Afghanistan, she left her career managing child protective cases and supporting refugee communities behind as well. Even more challenging, Anita was five months pregnant at the time, and because her husband was unable to obtain a travel visa, she found herself having to navigate a new language, a different culture, and an unfamiliar country entirely on her own.


“I went through a period of deep disappointment and depression, where I wasn’t able to do much for myself,” Omary said.

Then something incredible happened: Omary met a woman who would become her close friend, offering support that would change her experience as a refugee—and ultimately the trajectory of her entire life.

Understanding the journey

Like Anita Omary, tens of thousands of people come to the United States each year seeking safety from war, political violence, religious persecution, and other threats. Yet escaping danger, unfortunately, is only the first challenge. Once here, immigrant and refugee families must deal with the loss of displacement, while at the same time facing language barriers, adapting to a new culture, and sometimes even facing social stigma and anti-immigrant biases.

Welcoming immigrant and refugee neighbors strengthens the nation and benefits everyone—and according to Anita Omary, small, simple acts of human kindness can make the greatest difference in helping them feel safe, valued, and truly at home.

A warm welcome

Dee and Omary's son, Osman

Anita Omary was receiving prenatal checkups at a woman’s health center in West Haven when she met Dee, a nurse.

“She immediately recognized that I was new, and that I was struggling,” Omary said. “From that moment on, she became my support system.”

Dee started checking in on Omary throughout her pregnancy, both inside the clinic and out.

“She would call me and ask am I okay, am I eating, am I healthy,” Omary said. “She helped me with things I didn’t even realize I needed, like getting an air conditioner for my small, hot room.”

Soon, Dee was helping Omary apply for jobs and taking her on driving lessons every weekend. With her help, Omary landed a job, passed her road test on the first attempt, and even enrolled at the University of New Haven to pursue her master’s degree. Dee and Omary became like family. After Omary’s son, Osman, was born, Dee spent five days in the hospital at her side, bringing her halal food and brushing her hair in the same way Omary’s mother used to. When Omary’s postpartum pain became too great for her to lift Osman’s car seat, Dee accompanied her to his doctor’s appointments and carried the baby for her.

“Her support truly changed my life,” Omary said. “Her motivation, compassion, and support gave me hope. It gave me a sense of stability and confidence. I didn’t feel alone, because of her.”

More than that, the experience gave Omary a new resolve to help other people.

“That experience has deeply shaped the way I give back,” she said. “I want to be that source of encouragement and support for others that my friend was for me.”

Extending the welcome

Omary and Dee at the Martin Luther King, Jr. Vision Awards ceremony at the University of New Haven.

Omary is now flourishing. She currently works as a career development specialist as she continues her Master’s degree. She also, as a member of the Refugee Storytellers Collective, helps advocate for refugee and immigrant families by connecting them with resources—and teaches local communities how to best welcome newcomers.

“Welcoming new families today has many challenges,” Omary said. “One major barrier is access to English classes. Many newcomers, especially those who have just arrived, often put their names on long wait lists and for months there are no available spots.” For women with children, the lack of available childcare makes attending English classes, or working outside the home, especially difficult.

Omary stresses that sometimes small, everyday acts of kindness can make the biggest difference to immigrant and refugee families.

“Welcome is not about big gestures, but about small, consistent acts of care that remind you that you belong,” Omary said. Receiving a compliment on her dress or her son from a stranger in the grocery store was incredibly uplifting during her early days as a newcomer, and Omary remembers how even the smallest gestures of kindness gave her hope that she could thrive and build a new life here.

“I built my new life, but I didn’t do it alone,” Omary said. “Community and kindness were my greatest strengths.”

Are you in? Click here to join the Refugee Advocacy Lab and sign the #WeWillWelcome pledge and complete one small act of welcome in your community. Together, with small, meaningful steps, we can build communities where everyone feels safe.

This article is part of Upworthy’s “The Threads Between U.S.” series that highlights what we have in common thanks to the generous support from the Levi Strauss Foundation, whose grantmaking is committed to creating a culture of belonging.

Education

How embracing the 'Empty Boat Theory' can help you keep anger and anxiety in check

The classic Taoist parable has found new life on TikTok, but its core message stays the same.

empty boat theory, taoism, buddhism, psychology, mindset, anger, anxiety, self help, mindfulness

Ancient wisdom for the modern day.

We all have moments where it feels like the world is against us. When we assume people are thinking negatively about us, we act accordingly by becoming angry or anxious. Once that mindset latches on, it can be tough to let go.

But one simple Taoist parable-turned-viral-TikTok-hack offers a gentle yet powerful reminder that we are not the main character in everyone’s story.


What is the “Empty Boat Theory”?

@sean.of.the.living The “empty boat” theory has me brain spinning lately. This is a brain hack to staying in a happier mindset. #advice #emptyboat #lifehack ♬ original sound - sean.of.the.living

Think of it as a thought experiment. Imagine yourself on a boat in the middle of a lake, as another boat drifts towards you, threatening to knock right into you. The closer this incoming vessel gets, the angrier you become.

Then, at the last second, you steer your boat out from the path of collision, only to notice that the other boat is empty. What this really puts into perspective, as TikToker @sean.of.the.living put it, is “There was never anybody to be angry with in the first place.”

“That’s life, isn’t it?” he said. “We assume everything’s about us. ‘They’re just doing that to screw me, to piss me off.’”

“Most of the time, nobody’s thinking about you.”

The Empty Boat Parable

@aliabdaal The Empty Boat: A Lesson in Letting Go A man gets furious when another boat crashes into him, shouting and ready to fight. But when the fog clears, he sees the boat is empty. No one was steering, no harm was intended. His anger disappears. Most frustrations in life are just empty boats. People are dealing with their own struggles, not trying to hurt you. Next time you feel anger rising, ask yourself – am I just reacting to an empty boat?
♬ original sound - Ali Abdaal

However, long before it was a viral brain hack on TikTok, this story taught how much self-inflicted suffering comes simply from the stories we tell ourselves about other people's attitudes towards us.

As the parable goes, a young monk (or simply a young man, depending on which version you read) hops onto a boat in hopes of finding a quiet spot to meditate. Suddenly, he is bumped by another boat. Furious, the monk opens his eyes and lashes out at the person responsible for disrupting his flow. There is, however, no one to blame. The boat is empty. Knowing there's now no one to be mad at, truly, the man's anger instantly dissipates.

The core message is that sometimes a bump is just a bump. We need not assume malicious intent, and would be better equipped to handle life’s collision with grace if we didn’t.

The Spotlight Effect

Bringing it into therapy-speak, the Empty Boat Theory/Parable also relates to the spotlight effect, which is the tendency to wrongly believe that others are mentally scrutinizing us when, in fact, they are likely not thinking about us at all.

This bias is a symptom of egocentrism. You don’t have to be a full-blown narcissist to be egocentric. We all, from time to time, consider ourselves to be the center of the universe in some way. It’s part of being an individual! But without mindfulness, we can let our egos overestimate how many eyes are actually on us at any given time, which only leads to a lot of unnecessary anxiety.

Whether you wanna call it a brain hack, ancient wisdom, or a psychological principle, we could all benefit from reminding ourselves to really pick our battles. Easier said than done in today’s world, but vital nonetheless. Here's to hoping that being aware of all the empty boats out there will lead to smoother sailing for everyone.

And if you're wondering just who’s to blame for letting that rogue boat out to wreak havoc on the water…? Well, that’s a different conversation.

This article originally appeared last year.

Joy

A 'social experiment' lets people from Texas and San Francisco randomly connect on a payphone

"People don't want to be seen as stereotypes. People look to connect on human stuff."

Matter Neuroscience,  payphone experiment, Texas, California, Abilene, San Francisco, humanity
Photo Credit: Canva, Matter Neuroscience, Instagram

Two payphones set up in Abilene, Texas and San Francisco, California let complete strangers chat.

Imagine you're walking by a payphone in Abilene, Texas, when it unexpectedly rings. You pick up, only to hear that a total stranger over 1500 miles away in San Francisco is on the other end of the line. Do you argue, as so many social media algorithms would have people do? Or do you dig into your primal human instinct, the one that makes evolution possible, and find yourself connecting?

The biotech company Matter Neuroscience had this thought. What if they chose one of the most conservative and most liberal cities in the U.S. and installed free payphone-looking devices in each one? The idea is to bridge the gap between the great divide many are currently experiencing. Whether due to politics, religion, or different lifestyles, many are seemingly forgetting that we're all just human beings searching for contentment.


On their Instagram page, Matter Neuroscience (@Matterneuroscience) explains that it's about people connecting from all walks of life. "The goal of this project is to create space for friendly, human-to-human conversations. We believe that a few different opinions (even on important political topics) should not block us from having a truly positive, maybe even fun conversation with other humans."

How it works

As explained on the initial Instagram Reel, "When one phone is picked up, it automatically calls the other." In a video, we see one of the Matter Neuroscience teammates, Logan Ivey, setting up an old payphone that was bought on Facebook Marketplace for $300.00. Ivey jimmies it open to put a modem inside, with a Verizon SIM card inserted. In essence, it's a cell phone inside of a payphone.

On the side, the words "The Party Line" are painted to entice people walking by to give it a shot. At the top of the "payphone" in San Francisco, they've written "Call a Republican." (In Texas, it says "Call a Democrat.") There's an extra plaque at the top that says, "This payphone is a social experiment. Right now you're in San Francisco, the most liberal city in America. When you pick up this phone, it will automatically connect you to another payphone in Abilene, Texas, the most conservative city in America."

They continue their mission statement, writing, "The goal for this project is to have people from different places have meaningful conversations. Because hostile political discourse increases our brain's cortisol levels and suppresses our happiness. But positive conversations do the opposite. We are recording the conversations so that we can highlight positive ones on our social media account, though any personal names shared will be bleeped out, as we treasure your anonymity. Have fun and enjoy!"

The results

People are already taking the "have fun" part to heart. In one conversation, the phone rings in Texas and a young woman answers. After some giggly pleasantries, they each establish the cities they're in and the current weather. The adorably pure laughter continues as they realize what a cool thing they're taking part in. The Texan shares, "I've been to San Francisco before. You have those cool little streets and stuff."

The Californian is, unfortunately, late for a meeting, but noted, "I was like I had to pick up." The Texan is glad she did, gushing, "Oh my goodness. We picked up at the same time. I'll probably never see you again. But Jesus loves you and I hope you have a good life."

The Californian agrees. "Oh yeah, you too. Sending you all the best. All the blessings."

Another conversation has a Texas woman and a California guy connecting nearly immediately. He admits, "I was running down the street and I heard the phone ring. Wait a second, I know that phone!"

They laugh and once again pleasantly discuss the weather. He then asks, "What else do you want to talk about?"

She answers honestly, saying, "I don't know! We just wanted to call and make some friends." He replies, "Oh fantastic! Well, I'm going to meet a bunch of friends out. We're a group called Moto Chug. It's not really a group, but it's the group text name. And we're all friends who ride motorcycles together." He tells her a bit about their group, to which she replies in earnest, "You are so cool. I hope that you know that. And I hope that you go and tell your friends that this random college kid from Abilene, Texas thinks that you guys are so cool."

He sweetly responds, "Awww, awesome! Right on! Well, it's great to talk to Texas, man. Hang in there. I've got good family in Texas and they're all great people. Hella love going from San Francisco to Abilene, Texas right now."

They then exchange names before he tells her, "We need to make more connections to make this a better place."

The comment section is delighted. One writes, "I'm grinning from ear to ear — just pure joy on what's going on here! Can't wait for the next call."

Another adds, in part, "The type of discourse we really need in this country."

Matter Neuroscience and their mission

Matter Neuroscience has been searching for the definitive formula for happiness since they were founded in 2019. Alongside the Happiness Research Institute, Maastricht University, and the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai, they (according to their website) sought "to find a universal biomarker for happiness to guide all of us to long, happier, healthier lives." But what they've found is that the answer is far more complex than some doctors or even philosophers might suggest.

Upworthy had the chance to chat with Ben Goldhirsh, who co-founded Matter Neuroscience, alongside neuroscientist Axel Bouchon. (Small world! Goldhirsh incidentally was also one of the co-founders of GOOD Worldwide, the umbrella company of Upworthy.) He explained that in all of his research, he has found that if people only understood how the brain worked, it could make a real difference. "It's interesting how culture sort of focuses you on certain areas. The reality is that your biology requires this rainbow of activity."

He also notes that everyone should benefit from happiness research, not just depression and anxiety patients. Their team decided, "We should create something that is useful to everyone. So, we basically opened up the 'Emotional Fitness Club' (an app.) Everyone should understand the science of happiness. We all have this incredible organ, and we're trying every day to teach people about this stuff."

The payphone experiment wanted to test how people, when stripped to just two voices across the country, would react to one another. "One of the topics that a lot of people in our community were talking about is how stressful things feel right now. And so cortisol is this fascinating and super valuable chemical in the brain that is popped out when we experience conflict or a fight-or-flight response."

The question posed was: "Are we in a state of fight or flight actually? Or are we actually just misconstruing things and feeling like we're in conflict? If we put a phone booth in the most liberal city and the most conservative city based on voting blocks, will people choose conflict? Because in a way, that's what the media would make you think people would choose. Or will people choose to connect and find common ground, which releases all these positive emotions, or chemicals, in the brain? Will they choose cortisol and conflict? Or will people choose cannabinoids and finding common ground?"

Turns out, at least so far, that 100 percent of the people in these conversations have chosen common ground. "I get to listen to all of this. It's this amazing break from the funny mirror that we're constantly looking in."

Additionally, Goldhirsh shares that people are just looking to connect. "People don't want to be seen as stereotypes. People look to connect on human stuff. Like 'Oh, I'm on a date.' Or 'Gosh, this sandwich is so expensive.' Humans are awesome, and if given the chance to connect, it brings out our humanity. And it's really nice to see how we biologically evolved to connect with each other directly. And when we have those opportunities, it turns out the best parts of us."

Gen X; Gen X grandparents; absent grandparents; Gen X worst grandparents; Millennials; worst grandparents; Gen Z

Gen X designated the 'worst grandparents' by Millennials

Generation X, typically the children of Baby Boomers born between the years of 1965-1980 tend to have a complicated reputation depending on who you ask. Some view them as a feral generation never to be spoken of poorly without consequence, while others view them as innovators pushing us into the future. But in recent years, Gen Xers have been dubbed the "worst grandparents" by social media users.

This multi-year conversation started when a video went viral calling Gen X out for being "terrible" grandparents, claiming that they never want to help with grandchildren. It didn't take long before other Millennials piled on to air their own grievances about Gen X grandparents. Most people criticizing the "new grandparents" were genuinely perplexed as to how they did not want to be more involved in the lives of their grandchildren.


Gen X; Gen X grandparents; absent grandparents; Gen X worst grandparents; Millennials; worst grandparents; Gen Z Family baking fun in the kitchen.Photo credit: Canva

Kylie Muse reveals in a video that she felt neglected by her Gen X parents growing up, saying, "It's quite a common theme for Gen X parents to be neglectful in some capacity and it's just crazy to me how more of them haven't learned from the past 20 to 30 years, instead of these grandparents seeing their kids having kids as an opportunity to restore the health in their relationships with their kids by showing up and helping them during the hardest transition of their lives, they would rather double down and compromise their relationship with that next generation. All for the sake of hyper-individualism and pride."

@kylies.muse

Gen x grandparents and their beloved empty nest 🥴 just say you hate having a family 😭 #grandparents #grandparentsoftiktok

The critique coming from the younger generation is not lost on Gen X, and they started coming out in force to respond with such vigor you'd think John Hughes had just announced the re-release of The Breakfast Club. It would seem that some of the people complaining of the lack of involvement have not considered that Gen X could have valid reasons for not immediately jumping in to take on grandparenting in the way some expect. A man by the name of John S. Blake gives a candid look into why Gen X was neglected as children and, in turn, became hype-independent at an early age.

"As a Gen X who's been on this earth long enough to have some hindsight I can tell you this, being independent at a young age is not a flex, what it actually means is capitalism is so brutal that our parents were forced to neglect their own children to stay alive. My generation was struggling so much that we had to leave our children unattended in order to produce enough so that we could afford to exist," Blake says.

@blackfluidpoet

Replying to @ellens0061 #foryoupage #homealone #fyp #foryou

But perhaps one of the most heart wrenching explanations comes from an elder Millennial who goes by the name Amazing Dea. In response to another Millennial who asks about Gen X being let off the hook, Dea shares, "Being as though you look like you might be a younger Millennial, let me go ahead and enlighten you. Generation X and older Millennials had to live through more than just this pandemic. We had the crack epidemic, we had the AIDS epidemic and let me tell you something, it was scary as f***."

Dea went on to explain that there were apartment complexes burned due to high populations of people with AIDS living in them and how they would witness people go from being completely normal to being addicted to crack in a matter of weeks. It seems that depending on socioeconomic status, Gen Xers lived wildly different lives with the common theme being growing up entirely too fast at an extremely young age.

Gen X; Gen X grandparents; absent grandparents; Gen X worst grandparents; Millennials; worst grandparents; Gen Z Three generations smiling by the sea.Photo credit: Canva

Another person kindly breaks down the confusion over why Gen X isn't rising to the occasion of being award-winning grandparents. In response to the criticism she replies, "We grew up in a different time, first of all. A lot of us, meaning me, Gen X, I was raised by boomers. A lot of us did not get raised by our grandparents. We were like the feral kids, like by 7 and 9 years old we were actually babysitting our brothers and sisters, alright."

The woman explains further in the video that Gen X doesn't want to raise their grandchildren or simply be babysitters, that there's a difference between expecting grandparents to be involved and expecting them to be babysitters.

@that1crazy72

Let’s take it a step further. You share DNA with your grandkids they are part of you not everyone gets the privilege of being a grandparent so if you are one take that as a blessing #genxgrandparents

In many of the response videos shared by Gen Xers, they certainly seem to love their grandchildren and children alike, but there's a discrepancy in expectation. The consensus of the forgotten generation seems to be that they had adult responsibilities much too early, were exposed to adult life experiences at a young age, and were often left to their own devices for long periods of time while also being told that their voices didn't matter.

While the argument seems to be around their lack of involvement as grandparents, they appear to be saying that they want to enjoy the freedom they didn't have as children, while being valued as a person and not a babysitter. In many follow up videos, Gen Xers gushed over their grandchildren and how they loved when they were around. It's just that they draw the line at raising them. Maybe for some, their experiences with their own childhood isn't enough to move Gen X out of the "worst grandparents" category, but for others it provides much needed context.

This article originally appeared in June.

Pop Culture

People rally behind an older woman who refused to train her 25-year-old replacement

"They expected me to teach her the job they said I wasn't good enough for."

ageism, workplace ageism, workplace violations, hr, negotiating severance package, exit strategy, hiring, jobs

An older employee refused two train her replacement who was "fresh out of grad school."

When an older employee was asked to train a 25-year-old to do the same job she'd been doing for as long as the young recruit had been alive, she had some choice words. And it became a vital lesson in not getting exploited.

The TikTok creator, who goes by The Unobsolete (@theunobsolete) centers her content around helping people “fight age bias” in the workplace. She explained how she had been “passed over” for a promotion that she had rightfully earned over the past two-and-a-half decades and was instead expected to train someone “fresh out of grad school” who presumably would then do the job for a fraction of the price.


“They expected me to teach her the job they said I wasn’t good enough for.”

The Unobsolete didn’t entertain pleasantries as she flat-out said “no.”

@theunobsolete watched 25-year-old get my promotion then ask me to train her. I said no. Not sorry. Not maybe. Just no. She shocked. Manager furious. HR email about team player. Don’t care. They passed me over for promotion I earned. Gave it to someone with zero experience. Expected me to teach her job they said I wasn’t good enough for. Train my replacement? Pay me. Want 25 years knowledge? Triple salary consulting rates. Want me to smile while you humiliate me? Wrong person. Not your free training program. Not making cheap hire look competent. Not handing over everything so you can pay her half. They said unprofessional. I said appropriately compensated or not sharing. They said not supporting team. I said team didn’t support me. Silence. Second you stop being useful they stop caring. Stop pretending you owe them anything.#promotions #over50 #notateamplayer #genx #isaidno ♬ original sound - The Unobsolete

"I'm not your free training program," she explained. "Want me to smile while you humiliate me? Wrong person." Furthermore, she noted that if she were going to move forward with the training, she would be expecting “triple salary consulting rates” as payment.

While she got reprimanded by HR for not “being a team player,” she maintained her stance that she deserved to be “fairly compensated for her expertise” or she wasn’t sharing it.

"They said [I was] not supporting [the] team. I said [the] team didn’t support me."

She then concluded the video with a word of caution to other folks who might find themselves in similar situations:

"The second you stop being useful, they stop pretending to care. So stop pretending you owe them anything."

With over four million views, the video certainly resonated. People flooded the comments agreeing how real ageism is in the workplace, and commended The Unobsolete for standing her ground.

"Can't be a team player for a team that played you," one person said.

Quite a few shared their own horror stories. One person recalled, "They hired 6 people to replace me and the work I was doing & wanted me to train them. Nope."

Another said, “I was laid off from a job and they said they’d be fine, because I wrote a literal manual on how to do everything for when I was on vacation. First thing I threw in the trash cleaning out my office. They emailed a few days later, asking where it was. I told them.”

In subsequent videos, The Unobsolete shared that while she didn’t get fired outright (for obvious legal reasons), the company had less direct ways of phasing her out. First, a meeting was held to discuss her "attitude.” Then, she was excluded from company functions and given less work. Eventually, she was called into another meeting and told the company's culture might not be a "good fit" for her.

@theunobsolete UPDATE: Refused to train replacement. What happened next I expected. Two days later meeting with manager and HR. My attitude. Not that they passed me over or wanted free labor. My attitude refusing exploitation. They said not collaborative poor leadership need team players. I said you passed me over want free training punish boundaries that’s control not collaboration. Silence. Not willing develop staff maybe not culture fit. I said right. Culture exploiting experience isn’t my fit. Ready for compensation talk? No? Back to my job. Didn’t fire me. Can’t. Lawsuit risk. Instead stopped including meetings gave projects away documented everything performance issues. Managed out playbook. I documented everything back. Every email meeting project. Knew exactly what they were doing. #promotions #isaidno #refused# #over45 #corporatetiktok ♬ original sound - The Unobsolete


"I agree," The Unobsolete apparently said in the meeting. "A culture that exploits experience isn't a fit for me."

Still, she didn’t back down and asked what the severance package she would receive for leaving. Unsurprisingly, that offer started off low with two weeks' worth of pay. The Unobsolete told them she expected six months of pay with full benefits through the end of the year, plus a neutral reference letter, and a release stating that they wouldn’t contest her unemployment.

When the manager said her demands were “unreasonable,” The Unobsolete replied, “So is asking me to train my replacement for free.”

@theunobsolete UPDATE PART 3: Refused train replacement. How it ended. Three weeks managed out documented retaliation. Manager and HR called me in. Don’t think right fit anymore. Best we part ways.#refusedtotrain #notateamplayer #isaidno #over50 #corporatetiktok ♬ original sound - The Unobsolete

“I’ve never been prouder of someone I don’t know,” one viewer wrote.

Thankfully, this story has a happy ending. The Unobsolete got her demands met, and with that six months of pay, she was able to build what she “actually wanted.” Furthermore, she learned that not long after she left, the 25-year-old quit the job and the company was left scrambling to fill the position. Talk about karmic justice.

“Turns out, I wasn’t obsolete after all. I was just undervalued. There’s a difference.”

Now, she’s taking what she’s learned to help other experienced professionals protect themselves against being taken advantage of.

“They’re counting on you being afraid…stop being what they’re counting on.”

That’s useful advice for anyone, no matter what age they are.

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Aerial view of man mowing his lawn

There is a particular kind of frustration that comes with being told how to mow your own lawn. Not whether the grass is too long, not whether the edges need trimming, but the specific direction your lawnmower needs to travel. For the man behind the TikTok account @rootedlawnco, that was apparently the line.

His HOA had instructed him to mow only in straight lines. So he did. Sort of.


In a video that has been bouncing around TikTok with the caption "Take that HOA," he methodically mows his lawn in long, flowing, perfectly symmetrical waves. The result is gorgeous: a sea of alternating light and dark grass bands that roll across the yard like something off a golf course or a baseball field. He even varies the cut depth on alternating passes to give it a color shift, which makes the whole thing pop even more from a distance. The text overlay on the video reads, "When HOA tells you only straight lines." His face, for what it's worth, is extremely unbothered.

@rootedlawnco

Take that HOA!! #mowing #stripes #hoa #lawncare #mowing

In a follow-up video, he shared an aerial shot of the lawn covered in sand: "POV: You can't go to the beach, so you bring the waves to you."

@rootedlawnco

Surfs up 🤙🏽 What do you think of the wavey stripes? Pretty sure @Chase has these trade marked by now. #stripes #waves #lawnstripes #beforeandafter #reelmower #allettmowers #greengrass🌱 #dronevideo


The comments landed exactly where you'd expect. "Tell them you have astigmatism and this is straight," wrote @nowherenothin. @spiderlover74 added, "No way they're trying to control the direction you mow your lawn." One commenter, @caffeinatedpossum, offered a legal-ish read on the situation: "HOAs have legal rights to control the aesthetic of your grass, but there's no legal standard for them to control cutting patterns as the cutting pattern is semantic." (That's one interpretation, though HOA rules vary widely by state and governing documents, so your mileage may vary on that one.)

The broader frustration behind the video is real and well documented. A survey conducted by Rocket Mortgage found that 57% of HOA homeowners dislike having one, and more than 3 in 10 feel their HOA has too much power. A separate YouGov poll found that most Americans actually oppose HOA rules specifically around landscaping, with more people against those restrictions than in favor of them. And yet, 38% of HOA residents think their HOA is too restrictive, with rules about yard signs, fences, and landscaping among the most contested.

It's worth saying that HOAs were not invented to tell people which direction to push their lawnmower. The idea was originally to maintain shared spaces and protect property values. But there's a gap between that intention and the reality of a board with the authority to regulate the pattern of someone's grass, and that gap is where videos like this one get millions of views.

In yet another video, he openly disregards the HOA's rules against using sand to level his yard: "POV: When the HOA says no sand, but you did it anyway..."

@rootedlawnco

Yep, the HOA will be all over me for this one! Got a bumpy lawn? Check out my 4 part mini series on You Tube and learn all you need to know in under 10 minutes. Mowing is super enjoyable but mowing a smooth lawn is literally the best thing! I need to do this to my back lawn pretty badly. Maybe this Fall I will. #level #leveling #bumpy #Lawn #diy #lawntips #compost #sand #topsoil #smooth #HOA

There is something deeply satisfying about a response that is simultaneously fully compliant and completely defiant. He did not fight the rule. He did not post an angry letter or file a complaint. He just made something beautiful out of the constraint, posted it to TikTok, and let the rest of us enjoy it.

The lawn looks incredible, for the record.

You can follow @rootedlawnco on TikTok for more content on home decor and lifestyle.