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Woman simply refuses to let a female work on her car—'they belong behind the scenes'

misogyny, feminism, female mechanic

via @centrayray

When a video caption reads, “blows my mind how people can be,” you tend to expect the worst. And though it’s practically common knowledge that misogyny is still a very real thing, watching this woman outright refuse to let another woman work on her car is still shocking. Not to mention troubling.

Nearly 2 million people on TikTok have now seen this video, which was uploaded by a woman named Rachel (@25centrayray), who works at a car dealership in the service department.

On the screen we see: “When a Karen calls and we are all female service writers…”


@5centrayray

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Rachel’s coworker, Autumn, simply answers the phone with a warm, professional greeting, and the woman on the other line is already displeased.

“Autumn, I didn't ask for a female, I would like to talk to a male.”

Yeah, she said that. And more.


The woman continued, “my opinion is that females don’t belong in the service department. They belong behind the scenes doing the paperwork.”

This is the part that really got me. Like, doesn’t this woman know that 99% of most jobs is paperwork? What does that even mean?

Rachel lets us know that their department is run by a female service director who oversees two dealerships and has more than 25 years of experience. So if this woman is looking for a qualified professional, she’s in luck!

But if she simply needs a male in charge, she’s asking for disappointment.

Autumn breaks the sad news that unfortunately, there are no males in the dealership’s service department. The only solution is to transfer her to the sales department, where there is a male coworker.

Which is actually a nonsolution as, predictably, the woman will get transferred back. And she does.

When the woman eventually gets back on the line, she tells Autumn that she needs to make an appointment, threatening, “I just hope there are no females on the desk when I get there.” Yikes.

Once again Autumn (the real MVP of this whole debacle) keeps her cool and politely reminds the woman that there are still no males who work in the service department.

The woman’s reply? “Oh God, that is totally messed up. I need my oil changed but there better be a male mechanic that I can talk to.”

Rachel lets us know that this woman is something of a regular customer, and has “some issue every visit,” but this goes beyond just being a difficult patron.

The woman then says that she doesn’t "want a female working on [her] car” because last time she came, it took a hour to do a job that should have taken five minutes. That because an “incompetent” female failed to page her at a reasonable time, she had to “track down a male” to get it sorted.

Rachel tells us what actually happened though.

“The time she speaks of is the appointment she refused to reschedule due to our shop getting hit with Covid and being down four techs so the shop was behind, and was told of the extended wait time.”

It’s always a best practice to avoid judgment and take a middle approach, but as a woman watching this, I can’t help but be gutted.

As one person wrote, “I will never understand female hating other females,” and, well, yeah. Hate is what it feels like.

Other people in the comments were quick to respond to this abhorrent behavior, including a woman who wrote, “as a female mechanic I’m livid.”

“This is repulsive,” another person added.

Others had more biting (yet pretty funny) responses:

"Ma'am, did you get your husband's approval first before you called us? I’d like a handwritten permission and notarized before we can continue..."

“You should have told her that her husband needs to call to schedule the appointment to make sure it's the right service being requested.”

To the dealership’s credit: The owner, rightfully “shocked and outraged” after seeing this video, had the woman “fired as a customer.”

You would think—especially in this day and age—that our society could wrap their heads around the fact that yes, women are completely capable of doing more than “behind the scenes” jobs.

But rest assured, if this woman holds this opinion, others do too. It’s heartbreaking and infuriating all at the same time.

On the other hand TikTok is an amazing platform for exposing outdated thinking and challenging obsolete societal norms. One of our staff writers, Tod Perry, wrote a few months ago about a female mechanic who was told “she didn’t belong” by a male coworker. As the headline suggests, she proved him wrong.

As more and more women pursue opportunities, do kickass work and succeed, it’s bound to piss a few people off, who somehow view equality as some sort of threat to tradition. But in the end, that’s their problem.

empty nester, empty nesters, declutter, decluttering, decluttering tips

Mom and empty nester shares her tips for decluttering her home.

Deep cleaning and decluttering a home is a daunting task—especially for empty nesters. After spending a lifetime creating memories and living together under one roof, doing a big declutter can take an emotional toll.

It's a milestone that many empty nesters know the sting of. And in a cleaning community on Reddit, a 51-year-old mom and recent empty nester shared her experience cleaning and decluttering her home after entering this new phase of life.


"In my entire life, my house has always been messy. I mean, I didn’t have a disaster-level situation going on, but if someone dropped by unannounced, it would’ve been super embarrassing," she shared. "When my kids were younger, we had a housekeeper because I just couldn’t keep up. Now that we’re empty nesters, I realized I never really learned how to keep house."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

She explained that the book Unf*ck Your Habitat: You're Better Than Your Mess played an integral part in helping her declutter—and offered eight helpful tips to fellow empty nesters looking to organize their new lives.

1. Put stuff away, not down.

Her first tip is the key to decluttering.

"Whatever you have goes right back where it’s supposed to go when I’m done with it," she notes.

2. Do laundry every day.

And she doesn't just wash and dry her laundry when doing it.

"Just one load, start to finish. Wash, dry, fold, and put away," she shares. "Also, no chair or floor laundry. It gets put in the hamper or hung back up. No clothes are ever out."

3. I make the bed every day.

The benefits keep on giving by doing this, she notes.

"It just makes my bedroom look cleaner and I smile every time I come in my room," she writes. "Plus we aren’t fighting over the covers when we get in because the bed is straightened out."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

4. Do a quick daily clean-up of commonly used spaces.

She cleans the places that she and her husband use frequently.

"I keep a stack of cleaning rags in my master bath because it’s the only bathroom that’s used every single day. Every night, I spray the counter, wipe everything down, put everything back (that my husband leaves out), and wipe the mirror," she explains. "I also wipe down the toilet. I find that I don’t need a huge, big cleaning of this space because I’m keeping it up daily. Same goes for the kitchen."

5. Dishes are always put away, cabinet or dishwasher.

No dishes in the sink or stuck in the dishwasher.

"Dishes are finished in the dishwasher? It’s emptied and dirty ones are placed inside while waiting for the dishwasher to get full," she notes.

@brunchwithbabs

Life Changing Dishwasher Hack #tutorials #kitchenhacks #parentsoftiktok #dishwasherhack

6. Don't neglect your shoes.

When she takes them off, they get put away.

"Shoes are put away immediately upon walking in the house," she shares.

7. Knock out small tasks.

There is no time to waste.

"If it takes less than 5 minutes clean it while you’re waiting for something else to get done," she writes.

8. Take no days off.

Rather than assign certain days for cleaning, she is constantly doing it throughout the week.

"Lastly, I do not have scheduled cleaning days. I just do something all the time," she explains. "My life is kind of unpredictable, we love traveling or going out for the day so my so called cleaning schedule would be shot to hell every time. It’s better this way, because now I never feel behind."

Humor

Sweden wryly tells Switzerland they should split tourism topics so people stop confusing them

"Switzerland can promote loud noises, such as yodeling. In return, Sweden gets silence and…a lack of yodeling."

visit sweden, switzerland, countries, europe, swedish, swiss

People apparently don't know Sweden from Switzerland.

Sweden and Switzerland have over 1,000 years of peaceful relations, but that doesn't mean there aren't any issues between the two countries. An annoying thorn lingers in the side of both nations, but it's neither country’s fault. The problem? The rest of the world can’t tell them apart. People simply don’t know their kroppkakor (Swedish potato dumpling) from their birchermüesli (a Swiss breakfast dish), and constantly mix up Sweden with Switzerland.

The fact that both countries start with the same letters hardly seems like an excuse, yet here we are. Swedish people who move to the United States often complain of being introduced as Swiss. The New York Stock Exchange flew a Swiss flag to honor Spotify (a Swedish company), and a French hockey team once greeted their Swiss opponents, SC Bern, by playing the Swedish National Anthem and raising the Swedish flag. Skämtar du med mig? (“Are you kidding me?” in Swedish)


To end the confusion once and for all and help the world finally recognize the differences between the two nations, Sweden has created a landmark proposal to Switzerland. It is dry, wry, and genuinely hilarious.

- YouTube youtu.be

“If people struggle to separate our two countries, we need to help them. We can’t change the names of our nations, but we can become more distinct. Sweden offers the luxury of a different nature, that’s why we think it’s time to decide who promotes what, and hopefully, we can reach an agreement,” said Susanne Andersson, CEO of Visit Sweden.

The Swedish proposal is simple and practical, just like its citizens. The country hopes to make a clear distinction between the two countries by deciding who talks about what. “We will be able to communicate things like sandbanks, rooftops and silence. Meanwhile, Switzerland will focus on banks, mountain tops, and loud noises,” Andersson said in a statement.

visit sweden, northern lights, switzerland, europe, confusion Sweden get the Northern Lights.Photo: David Schreiner/Folio/imagebank.sweden.se

The Swedes hope that people will learn to distinguish Switzerland's technological advancements, such as particle accelerators and luxurious watches, from Sweden’s natural phenomena that, instead of winding you up, help you wind down. "Switzerland will offer luxury, including its expensive watches. And Sweden will offer a different kind of luxury, like forgetting about time," Andersson proposed.

The first draft of the official settlement was presented to Switzerland and provided to visitors of the Visit Sweden website. “We’re hoping that Switzerland will negotiate with us on this important matter. But if they want contemporary fashion, the answer is no. They get to have leather couture, and we think that’s fair,” Andersson said, referencing the yellow-painted leather pants traditionally worn by herdsmen in Appenzeller.

stockholm sweden, visit sweden, switzerland, rooftop, tourism Sweden gets rooftops. Switzerland gets mountatintops.Photo: Emmie Bolmstedt/Visit Sweden

If Sweden and Switzerland come together on an agreement to distinguish their national identities, it’ll be a big win for the entire world. But, until then, the best way for you to truly learn the difference is to visit Sweden yourself.

Sweden’s calming, beautiful nature will refresh your spirit like no place on Earth. Imagine sailing on its pristine lakes while a sharp breeze runs through your hår (hair). Enjoy a hike in perpetual daylight during the Midnight Sun Period, or feast your ögon (eyes) on the mesmerizing Northern Lights in Swedish Lapland.

Looking for some high-altitude adventure? You and a friend could even take a yodeling tour in the Alps in the shadows of the magnificent Matterhorn. Sounds like fun? Sorry, got you. The Matterhorn is in Switzerland, and Swedish people don’t yodel; it throws off their lagom—a unique brand of Scandinavian chill.

sweden, swedes, swedish flag, tourism, switzerland Yay, Sweden. Giphy

Of course, Switzerland is nice, too. As long as you know what country you're heading to when you get on the plane, you'll surely find plenty of beauty and bliss in either one. But we have to hand it to Sweden for their tongue-in-cheek diplomacy throwing friendly shade at its "Sw" counterpart.

Find your lagom by planning your trip to Sweden today.

Joe grew up without stability. Now, he’s giving 10 adopted sons the home he never had.
True
Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption

Like many children who are placed in foster care across the United States, Joe’s childhood was marked by chaos and a struggle to survive.

Joe still remembers neglect and abuse being part of his daily reality. Often left to care for his younger siblings alone, Joe grew up far too quickly.


He and his brothers were placed in the New York foster care system at an early age. And when he aged out of foster care at 21, he had no family to turn to for support.

“Statistically, I should be in jail, or I could be dead,” Joe said. “But that’s not my destiny.”

Today, Joe is determined to change the trajectory for young people lingering in foster care … as an adoptive parent and as an advocate, raising awareness along with organizations like the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption.

A complex problem with an evidence-based solution

More than 100,000 children in the U.S. foster care system are waiting for a safe, permanent home. But the sad reality is that thousands will “age out” of the system between 18 and 21, stepping into adulthood without support, guidance or a safety net.

The consequences of this can be devastating. Youth who leave foster care without the support of a forever family are much more likely to experience negative outcomes, including homelessness, unemployment, substance abuse and early, unplanned parenthood.


Through its signature program, Wendy’s Wonderful Kids®, the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption is working to be a part of the solution across the U.S. and Canada. Through this program, the Foundation supports the hiring of adoption professionals — known as recruiters — who serve children most at risk of aging out of foster care, including older children, children with special needs and siblings.

Wendy’s Wonderful Kids recruiters use an evidence-based, child-focused model, identifying trusted adults in the child’s network who may be open to adoption — and research shows that it works. A five-year, national evaluation showed that children referred to the program are up to three times more likely to be adopted.

Changing the journey for a new generation

Xavier was 18 and at risk of aging out of foster care without family support when he met Joe.

“My biggest fear was that I was going to age out and not know how to be sufficient on my own,” Xavier said. But Joe adopted Xavier just weeks before he was set to age out of the system. In the years that followed, Joe adopted from foster care again. And again.

Today, Joe is a father to 10 sons, seven of whom were adopted with help from the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption.

“Meeting my boys has put them on a different path,” Joe said. “Wendy’s Wonderful Kids was a real support and guide to being able to do what I try to do: making sure they have the tools to survive.”

“For me, it’s been beautiful to see that [my brothers are] spreading out to go live their own lives,” Xavier said. “It’s something [Joe] has prepared us for. He gave us the mentality that we could do whatever we want.”

Writing a new ending

After aging out of foster care, Joe managed to defy the odds, graduating from college and becoming a school counselor. Still, despite his own success story, he knows that many children who spend time in foster care aren’t as fortunate.

Joe hopes providing a “home base” for his sons means a brighter future for them.

“Here, we have people you can call your family — your brothers, your father,” Joe said. “Everybody, no matter where they are, knows that they can come home.”

Learn more about the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption and how you can help find forever families for more children lingering in foster care right now.

Nature

Pennsylvania home is the entrance to a cave that’s been closed for 70 years

You can only access the cave from the basement of the home and it’s open for business.

Black-Coffey Caverns; cave house; basement cave; Baker Cavern

This Pennsylvania home is the entrance to a cave.

Have you ever seen something in a movie or online and thought, "That's totally fake," only to find out it's absolutely a real thing? That's sort of how this house in Pennsylvania comes across. It just seems too fantastical to be real, and yet, somehow, it actually exists.

The home sits between Greencastle and Mercersburg, Pennsylvania, and houses a pretty unique public secret. There's a cave in the basement. Not a man cave or a basement that makes you feel like you're in a cave, but an actual natural cave you can't get to unless you go through the house.


Turns out the cave was discovered in the 1830s on the land of John Coffey, according to Uncovering PA, but the story of how it was found is unclear. People would climb down into the cave to explore occasionally until the land was leased about 100 years later and a small structure was built over the cave opening.

The idea was to make it accessible to visitors and use the cave as a tourist attraction, and the small structure was eventually built into a two-story house. It was closed to the public in 1954 after the land was purchased for limestone mining and it remained closed for nearly 70 years. Sometime during that 70-year closure, the home that contains the cave was purchased by Dara Black, and in 2021, it reopened to the public.

Currently, the home is occupied by Black, but to gain access to the cave you can simply book a tour. The best part about booking a tour is that you only have to make a donation to enter. It's a pay-what-you-can sort of setup, but since someone actually lives in the home, you can't just pop in and ask for a tour. You have to go during the "open house" times available.

According to the Black-Coffey Caverns Facebook page, they treat the tours truly as an open house, complete with snacks and drinks. There's a waiting room area where people can chat and eat while they wait for the tour to start. They also offer cave yoga once a month. According to Uncovering PA, the tour takes about 45 minutes to complete and there are about 3,000 feet worth of passageways.

Imagine living on top of a cave and just taking strangers on a walk under your floorboards essentially. It makes me wonder if the house is quiet at night or if you can hear echoes of the cave sounds while you're trying to sleep. From the Facebook page, it appears that the cave doesn't have any lights, but there were pictures with some Christmas lights mounted to the cave walls. Otherwise, you have to use flashlights.

Hopefully, no mischievous children decide to play hide and seek or you just might have to call in a rescue crew. Literally. But what an unbelievable "pics or it didn't happen" kind of story to tell. It's not every day you run into someone that has a door that leads you to an underground cave.

If you want to see what a cave tour looks like starting from the outside of the house, check out the video below:

- YouTube youtu.be

This article originally appeared three years ago.

Joy

18-year-old took her college savings and bought the restaurant where she was a dishwasher

Samantha Frye, the newest owner of Rosalie's restaurant, is proving there's more than one way to invest in your future.

Samantha Frye, Rosalie’s Restaurant, teen entrepreneur, Ohio diner, dishwasher to owner, college savings, skip college, small business, Gen Z work, restaurant owner, trade vs college, National Student Clearinghouse, college enrollment, state promise programs, community college, Ohio State, Strasburg Ohio, inspiring teens, American Dream, local business

There are many way to invest in your future

Eighteen-year-old Samantha Frye has traded college life for entrepreneurship, and she has no regrets.

Frye began working at Rosalie's Restaurant in Strasburg, Ohio at 16 as a dishwasher, working up the ranks as a kitchen prep, server, then line cook. All while working a second job, sometimes third job.


After graduating from high school, Frye started college at Ohio State with plans of studying business or environmental engineering. But when she came back to work a shift at Rosalie’s for winter break, an opportunity arose—the owners had planned to sell the restaurant.

Ohio diner, dishwasher to owner, college savings, skip college, small business, Gen Z work, restaurant owner, trade vs college, National Student Clearinghouse, college enrollment, state promise programs, community college, Ohio State, Strasburg Ohio, inspiring teens, American Dream, local business She traded books for menus. Photo credit: Canva

The moment the opportunity appeared

"I was thinking that maybe [buying] was something I wanted to do," she told News 5 Cleveland. "I had savings because I was saving for college, so I had quite a bit of money saved away. And I was like, I could possibly do this."

Frye acted on that gut feeling, and used her college funds to buy Rosalie’s. Now she spends every day at her new business, either in the kitchen, on the floor or in the office meeting with sales reps.

Support and skepticism from the community

Though Fyre's mother, Brandi Beitzel, confessed to USA Today that she wasn’t initially “on board” with her daughter abandoning college plans, over time she became very “proud” of her for forging her own path, and applauded her “drive and ambition.”

That sentiment is echoed both by Rosalie’s regulars and staff, who are amazing at the young woman’s drive and confidence.

“I just really think she's a great example of a young lady that is following her dreams and doing what she loves,” said Leanna Gardner, an employee.

Rethinking college costs and alternatives

It’s no secret that there are significantly less students attending college—down by about a million since the start of the pandemic. And while there are no doubt potential long term collective consequences to that, with exorbitantly high student loan rates, it’s easy to see why young adults would avoid massive debt for careers that don’t require a college degree.

Luckily, there are more efforts to make college an affordable option being made nationwide, like offering a free two years worth of college to graduating students.

And as Frye is proving by example, not going to college is certainly not a death sentence for one’s future. There are many ways to plant seeds for success. Honestly, college or no college, no matter which path is taken, there will likely be more uncertainty than there are guarantees. Perhaps the best bet then is trust those pings of intuition.

"You don't need college to make a decent living, and I think that's what a lot of people think nowadays," Frye attests. "Follow your instinct, honestly. If it feels right, just do it."

This article originally appeared last year.