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This awesome sports league welcomes all genders, sexual orientations, and skill levels.

Athletic stigmas be damned.

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DICK'S Sporting Goods

Growing up, dodgeball was one of Darius Soler’s biggest fears.

A game where the kids who bullied him for being “big and gay and effeminate” could all target him with plummeting balls? Hard pass.

One day, when Soler was dodging gym class, the teacher found him curled up in a bathroom stall, feet propped on the door to conceal his presence. The coach then forced him to go to gym and “everyone threw balls at me — it was all of them, versus me,” remembers Soler.

Not surprisingly, as an adult, Soler thought his dodgeball days were far behind him — until his coworker invited him to watch his gay dodgeball league play.

A rush of anxiety overcame him as he watched the game — everyone was being hit by balls — but in the end, all the players united on the court, friendly, laughing, and apparently, all on the same side.

Seeing the camaraderie between players completely changed Soler’s vision of what a dodgeball game could be about. He joined the very next season.

“Now I love it,” he says. “I turned my fear into my strength and have grown a lot. Dodgeball has taught me a lot about camaraderie and I’m very grateful that I found my tribe.”  

Across America, LGBTQ sports leagues are creating communities.

“I didn’t have my gay friends, and now I have a bunch,” says Soler. Today, he plays on an all-black, gay dodgeball team. “I’ve never been on an all-black gay team of anything,” Soler says of the “family” he’s found.

This past Pride, Soler came out as trans and gender nonconforming, and says that the safe space built through the dodgeball league has offered immense support in realizing his identity.

“It’s been integral to who I’ve become. I don’t have a fear of showing who I am,” Soler says. “Everyone celebrates who they are.”

Soler’s far from the only person who has found a new community thanks to LGBTQ sports clubs. However, unlike him, Henry was actively looking.

When Henry (who’s name has been changed to maintain his privacy at work) first moved to New York City after college, he was struggling to build a gay group of friends. Some of his college friends had also moved to the city, and he was slowly building up a professional network. But when it came to building a tightknit circle of people who shared the same sexual orientation, he didn’t know where to start.

“I wasn’t looking for a relationship or a hookup. I just wanted friends,” he says.

An introduction to LGBTQ dodgeball through a colleague led Henry to sign up for kickball and bowling teams as well. And before long, he had a close-knit group of friends that he now regularly enjoys brunch and exploring New York with.

“People always say it’s so hard to make friends, specifically in the gay community,” he says. “But gay sports provided me a group of gay best friends — I don’t know where else you’d get that. It’s an opportunity to meet hundreds of people you already have something in common with — you have nothing to lose.”

In Los Angeles, Andrew Miller had a similar social struggle.

He had moved to L.A. over a decade before he found his LGBTQ sports league, and though he had a small cluster of gay friends, “They weren't the closest of friends, but they were my gay friends. The only activities we could do together were going out in West Hollywood,” he says.

Five years ago, a coworker asked Miller if he wanted to join Varsity Gay League, and Miller was intrigued by the “opportunity to meet other gays [who weren’t] in a bar scene.” He was eager to socialize with like-minded people and build a new support network.

Almost instantly, he felt like he belonged to a “chosen family.”

Varsity Gay League members playing volleyball. Photo via Varsity Gay League.

“This has nothing to do with the sport. No one signs up to win a game of dodgeball, kickball, or volleyball. They sign up to be part of a community,” Miller says.

“You’d be shocked at how not good people are at the games, but we all have fun.”

When he started playing, Miller could barely catch the ball, but now, he’s taken on the role of director of operations in the organization.  

For athletes who have been playing sports since childhood, LGBTQ sports organizations also offer the space to continue a lifelong hobby with their community.

In Boston, 32-year-old Stacey Furtado, who has played basketball since middle school, runs the Boston Women’s Gay Basketball League, a collective of 14 teams made up of 125 women, who range from former professional players, to women who have barely dribbled a basketball in their lives. Teams are drafted to equally distribute the athletic talent (or lack thereof). The most important element, as Furtado puts it, is making sure that every player feels welcome and that they’re building community.

Stacey Furtado about to sink a basket in the Boston Women's Gay Basketball League. Photo via Stacey Furtado.

“Last year my team was seventh in the rankings, but number one in our social hearts,” says Furtado. In fact, several players who met in the league have gotten married and “umpteenth relationships” have been born from games and socials.

“The pressure is off when you meet people through a sport,” Furtado says, “We’re all looking for friendships probably even more than love. The most rewarding thing is when you see that happen. People really find community.”

For those who are not athletically inclined, Furtado recommends going to an LGBTQ sports game to cheer on the players. “It’s a positive, active, fun environment,” she says of spectatorship.

Building a tight-knit circle of friends as an adult is hard, especially if you’re a marginalized person looking for similar people to bond and empathize with.

A Varsity Gay League kickball team. Photo via Varsity Gay League.

Though all these individuals came to their LGBTQ sports teams with various athletic background and ambitions, they all joined athletic leagues in search of the same thing: community.

Despite life’s ever-changing struggles — be it feeling like an outsider on the playing field or lacking a strong, supportive community as an adult — LGBTQ sports connect people in unexpected, stigma-defying ways.

This story was produced as part of a campaign called "17 Days" with DICK'S Sporting Goods. These stories aim to shine a light on real occurrences of sports bringing people together.

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5 ways people are going "All In" this week

From the silly to the sentimental, there are so many ways people like to go “all in” on something. Here are our five favorite examples this week.

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When you hear the words “all in,” what do you think? If you’ve read our last week's article, you might say lip syncing in the car so passionately that the car flips (special effects included). We've found that going "All In" can also be something heartfelt and magical, like not giving up on your lifelong dreams and becoming a figure skater at the age of 49.

Going “All In” is about doing what is special to you, whether it’s a lifelong goal or accidentally being way too passionate. Our friends at All In Food ask you what you “go all in” on? They’re all in on good ingredients, giving back to the community, and with this article, finding the best stories of people who go “All In” every week.

1. A Rubik's Cube Celebration

There’s nothing better than a bit of nostalgia to start your day. Let’s paint a picture: the year was 2016, and a young man in a red shirt placed an unsolved Rubik's cube in a bag. The next second he pulled it out: SOLVED. Someone in the crowd called out, “There are two Rubik's cubes in the bag!” What happened next was truly amazing, and the audiences reaction did not disappoint. You’ll have to watch the video yourself to see how the audience went "all in" with their response.

2. A Very All In Merry Poppins Costume

If you’ve ever watched a video by Justin Flom, you’ll know he goes All In on costumes for his kids all the time, and his 2.7 million followers exemplify that people will never get tired of his creativity and the whimsy that he creates for his family. With a hole cut out on the top of an umbrella and a bungee cord hooked into the ceiling, Justin’s daughter was able to seamlessly become Mary Poppins, using her umbrella to gently drift down from their second story. October has just begun…we can’t wait to see what else Justin goes All In on!

3. All In on Singles

This company is all about going all in, so much so it's called All In Food. These bars are packed with fiber and delicious ingredients, making for the perfect snack bar. For the last few months, All In bars have been available by the pack in three delicious flavors at Sprouts Farmers Market. As of this week, they have an exciting launch at the Sprouts "New For You Destination," so you can buy them as a single bar.

Now, you might be wondering, "Is this bar for me?" And just like dating, you need to try it to know for sure! So get out there and give it a go! You might be All In on the best snack bar too. And to give you that push, All In is giving you a free bar; just snap a pic of your receipt, and you’ll be reimbursed through the Aisle app!

4. All In on…birdwatching?

This trailer for the film, “LISTENERS: A Glimpse into Extreme Birdwatching” has got me hooked. This film is about the non-stop, action-packed game of birdwatching, aka "birding." One thing's for certain: bird watchers go all in. Before you judge, take a look at the trailer; you might be surprised by the competitive edge that the sport has garnered. I might not be All In on birdwatching just yet, but you can count me in on watching this completely free documentary on YouTube.

5. Man dancing at a football game

@gbrotherson

So this happened today! Best Day Ever! @Atlanta Falcons

Last on our list, we have proof that dance and sports don’t need to be mutually exclusive; a man can do both (yes, I’m talking to you, Chad from High School Musical 2). This video of a man dancing at an Atlanta Falcons football game is truly a great time all around. Gary Brotherson, a self-proclaimed “Jorts and Slides enthusiast,” according to his Tik Tok bio, went all in with his energetic dance moves while he was caught on the stadium fan cam.

Thank you for rounding us out this week Gary. We can't wait to see what the internet is going all in on next week!

Snag your free (!!) snack bar here while this deal lasts. Just pick up a bar at Sprouts and text a pic ofv your receipt to get it for free. Enoy!

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Yes, even cats have a favorite person. How they choose and how to tell they've picked you.

Just because they seem uninterested doesn't mean they don't pick favorites.

Photo credit: Canva

Even cats have a favorite person. Here's how they choose.

Cats may be persnickety at times or appear aloof to the presence of humans, but that doesn't mean they don't have their favorites. Just like dogs, cats also fancy having a human best friend, but unless the feline companion is overly affectionate, one may not know they've been chosen.

Some cats live up to the expectation that they will give the most attention to the person who likes them the least. But most cats are particular about who they choose to give their attention to. In a one-person household, there could be a real possibility that the human in the equation isn't the favorite. After all, cats are not dogs who will be excited by their humans' mere existence. Cats are much more like broke royalty who expect their humans to be grateful for the opportunity to scoop out their litter boxes.

cat; cats; pets; cat's favorite; people and cats; cat snuggles; cat behavior Curious cat and baby share a gentle moment on the grass.Photo credit: Canva

Due to the imaginary royal title, a cat is much more discerning about who they give their priceless attention to. Usually, it's easy to tell who kitty has designated as their favorite person in a multi-person household. But the question remains, how do they pick their person?

According to Union Lake Veterinary Hospital, "People who communicate with their cat by getting to know their cues and motives are more attractive to their cat companions." They added, "Another reason behind their preference is the cat’s breed or personality. If your cat is the type who wants to be chill and relax, they will probably gravitate towards the family member who is calm and quiet. Playful, energetic cats who love to stay active will likely choose a friend who gives them this exercise and attention. In fact, it may be that your cat is revealing something about you in why they choose to love you best."

cat; cats; pets; cat's favorite; people and cats; cat snuggles; cat behavior Feline friends sharing a tender moment by the window.Photo credit: Canva

Certified Feline Training and Behavior Specialist and founder of Cat Behavior Solutions, Molly DeVoss, explains to Rover that cats prefer people who have a calming presence, feed them, and play with them. She also shares how trauma in a cat's early life influences how they form attachments to humans. "If a cat (or kitten) were in an abusive or neglectful situation with a certain demographic, they’re more likely to feel uncomfortable and unsafe around some types of people."

How can you tell if a cat has chosen you as their favorite human?

Cats will let you know that you might be their favorite person by doing a few things. According to DeVoss, if a cat is keen on you being their number one human, they'll do things like headbutt your hands, legs, and even forehead. They'll bring you their toys, rub their scent on you, rub their teeth or mouth on you, and groom you by licking your hair. DeVoss also says that when a cat exposes their belly or flops around briefly, it displays a deep level of trust.

cat; cats; pets; cat's favorite; people and cats; cat snuggles; cat behavior A sweet moment shared with a fluffy friend.Photo credit: Canva

To become your cat's favorite person, you may need to start sharing some common interests. That doesn't mean you have to stalk bugs or start knocking things off of counters, but if your cat likes watching out the window, you can make it a shared activity. Cats can also be trained to perform tricks, especially those that are active and attentive to their surroundings. You can even get a cat play yard or "catio" for the ones that seem as if they're longing to do some porch sitting with you.

You can also bond with them by talking to them throughout the day, even if they don't know what you're saying, Union Lake Veterinary Hospital says. Being affectionate with your cat more often, with pets, hugs, and scratches, will make them feel loved and safe. Doing some of these things will have your feline companion purring their little hearts out in no time.

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Gen Xers and Boomers share the sobering warning signs about aging that totally snuck up on them

"Eventually you will end up in that CVS aisle you always skipped because it didn’t pertain to you."

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A group of friends hang out

Hands down, no one can speak on the truths about aging quite like Boomers (those born 1946 to 1964) or Gen X (those born 1965 to 1980). With years of life under their belt, they possess rare wisdom and insight into what it's like to really get old.

Over on Reddit, user @Knightress04 posed the following question to Boomers and Gen Xers on the hilariously named /AskOldPeople channel: "What’s something about aging that no one warned you about, but you wish they had?"

The responses did not hold back. Gen Xers and Boomers opened up about their first-hand experiences and let their opinions flow.

aging, Gen X, Boomers, Reddit, getting older, life advice, AskOldPeople, menopause, retirement, signs of aging A group of people sit around talkingCanva

These are the best responses to the warning signs about aging from Gen Xers and Boomers, including the good, the bad, and the ugly:

"The slow loss of everything, your abilities, your health, your friends, relatives, places you loved, etc. Just the eroding away of everything." —@ BreadfruitOk6160

"All the loss you endure." —@southerndude42

"I wish they had warned me that it's OKAY 'not to do anything' when you retire. My husband and I have been retired about two years now, and it's been wonderful. But we're not jetting around the world. We are just relaxing, enjoying being home. And that's okay, it doesn't mean we have a worse life now." —@slenderella148

aging, Gen X, Boomers, Reddit, getting older, life advice, AskOldPeople, menopause, retirement, signs of aging An older couple relaxes at homeCanva

"The invisibility." —@TimeSurround5715

Aches and pains don’t go away in a day. Sometimes it takes a week." —@OscarTravolta

"Start appreciating the smallest things… like a quiet morning, or when a friend texts u a meme outta nowhere. those tiny moments hit diff now." —@quietswoon

"It’s so much harder to gain muscle once you age." —@GroundAndSound

"That eventually you will end up in that CVS aisle you always skipped because it didn’t pertain to you." —@IntentionAromatic523

"How fast time goes by. I was 21 yesterday. Now I'm 69. Time went by way to quickly." —@Dry-Cause2061

aging, Gen X, Boomers, Reddit, getting older, life advice, AskOldPeople, menopause, retirement, signs of agingGif from "The Office" via Giphy


"That I would feel this great. And content. And so much more in love with my SO, decade after decade. That there would be as much joy in walking fast laps as there was in running full court basketball. That for all the travail I've had a wonderful life. That it would become so easy to understand Robinson Jeffers:"

Still the mind smiles at its own rebellions,
Knowing all the while that civilization and the other evils
That make humanity ridiculous, remain
Beautiful in the whole fabric, excesses that balance each other
Like the paired wings of a flying bird."

—@Own-Animator-7526

"All the napping! I've never needed so many naps..." —@Familiar_Collar_78

"Menopause. I knew so little about it beyond hot flashes, but what absolutely NOBODY told me was: after 40+ years of mostly painful, heavy periods, it is a GLORIOUS feeling not to have a period anymore. 🙌 I especially love the freedom of being able to travel without having to calculate whether I’d need to pack extra products and underwear. (Thank God my agony came pretty much like clockwork every 28 days. 🙄)." —@Technical-Bit-4801

"Death, there are fewer & fewer people that know who you really are & where you came from. I've these parts of my life I shared with friends, & they're dead now. It's a strange feeling, when I'm gone it'll be like those moments never happened. The loss of shared experiences, I guess. It's nothing terribly important, or even very impactful, it's just slightly sad." —@Inside_Ad_7162

aging, Gen X, Boomers, Reddit, getting older, life advice, AskOldPeople, menopause, retirement, signs of aging A woman sits alone in a fieldCanva

"How precious time will feel. Every moment matters to me now and I have no patience for squandering it. I consider myself very laid back but if there is anything that will trigger me, it's someone wasting my time. Feels like they're stealing my most precious resource." —@PicoRascar

"As a male. The crazy ear and nose hairs that grow." —@Mikethemechanic00

"Late sixties. ....something about aging no one warned about? sounds like it's gotta be something bad. I wasn't warned about how independent, footloose and fancy free I'd feel once all work and family commitments and obligations were fulfilled. And I can be cantankerous whenever I wanna be. Most folks get warned about long term health consequences but it is difficult to overcome the insidious long-term ill-health consequences of commercial, corporate, processed, fast food pressures and convenience. way too much is spent on consequences of poor health and not enough on prevention and education --- imho." —@Buzzhoops

aging, Gen X, Boomers, Reddit, getting older, life advice, AskOldPeople, menopause, retirement, signs of aging An elderly man jogging happilyCanva

"The sensitivity. I have always been a very sensitive person who feels things deeply. But I'm also GenX so calloused, but lord a mercy if middle-age hasn't turned me into a crybaby. I swear I never used to cry so much." —@earthgarden

"That regularly putting money into savings or a retirement account is as important as brushing your teeth every day." —@InternalAcrobatic216

"When you hear a song or band from your youth that you absolutely hated because they were so cheesy and god-awful bad, but now when you hear it.. it brings back smiles and memories…. that’s the cleansing power of Nostalgia!" —@Hillman314

This article originally appeared earlier this year. It has been updated.

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27 English words people have a hard time enunciating properly, even native speakers

"The word I notice people struggle with is 'vulnerable'. Something about that N following an L is tricky."

Image via Canva/Povozniuk

English words that are difficult to enunciate.

The English language is hard to master, even for native speakers. With over an estimated one million words in the language, not only are English words hard to memorize—they can be hard to properly pronounce and enunciate. Getting tripped up with pronunciation can make your communication unclear, or worse—make you sound uneducated.

As American English teacher Vanessa explains, many mispronounced words are common and used in daily conversation due to tricky consonants and vowels in English words. But by knowing the proper pronunciation, it can help you become a more confident speaker, which is why she shared 33 words that are hard for English language learners to pronounce, such as "probably," "drawer," and "sixth."

On the subreddit r/words, a person posed the question: "What's a word you've noticed many native English speakers have difficulty enunciating even though the word is used fairly often?"

Turns out, there are a menagerie of words people notoriously stumble over. These are 27 English words that people say are the hardest to enunciate.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Tricky 'R' words

"The word I notice people struggle with is 'vulnerable'. Something about that N following an L is tricky." - common_grounder

"Rural." - Silent-Database5613

“'Nucular' for nuclear." - throwawayinthe818

"Remuneration v renumeration (first one is correct)." - RonanH69

"February. It sounds like you're pronouncing it like it's spelled Febuary. But it's spelled February." - SDF5-0, ShadedSpaces

"Mirror. Some people pronounce it 'meer'." - weinthenolababy, diversalarums

"Anthropomorphize is a word I have to use semi-frequently with limited success each attempt." - ohn_the_quain

"I can’t say the phrase 'rear wheel' without considerable effort." - ohn_the_quain

"Eraser (erasure, but they're talking about the pink rubber thing)." - evlmgs

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Multiple syllables

"Exacerbated vs exasperated." - SNAFU-lophagus

"'Asterisk'. A lot of people wind up inadvertently name-checking Asterix. I think it's best for those who struggle to use the alternative name for that punctuation mark, the 'Nathan Hale', after the American patriot who famously declared, 'I can only regret that I have but one asterisk for my country!'" - John_EightThirtyTwo

"I realized recently I have always mispronounced mischievous. It's mis-chiv-us, not mis-chee-vee-us. I don't know if I've ever heard anyone pronounce that correctly." - callmebigley"

'Supposebly' [supposedly]. Drives me up the wall." - BlushBrat

"Library. My coworker knows I hate it, so he’ll say Liberry every time." - Jillypenny"ET cetera, not 'ect' cetera. I think people are used to seeing the abbreviation etc and since there is no diphthong tc in English their mind bends it into ect." - AdFrequent4623

"The amount of people who say Pacific when they're trying to stay specific is pretty alarming. I'm not even sure if they know it's a different word sometimes." - Global-Discussion-41

"Then there was my old boss who would confidently and consistently use the word tenant when he meant tenet." - jaelith"

"Probably." - Rachel_Silver

"Contemplate. It's one of those word I hear people stumble over more than anything, often it comes out as Comtemplate, Contempate or a combination of both." - megthebat49

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Foods

"Turmeric. People drop the first R. It drives me nuts!" - Jillypenny

"Oh, and it’s espresso, no X [ex-presso]." - Jillypenny

"Also cardamom with an N." - nemmalur

"Pumpkin (punkin)." - evlmgs

espresso, espresso gif, sipping espresso, espresso drink, drinking espresso sipping modern family GIF Giphy

Awkward vowels

"Crayon 👑. My ex pronounced it 'cran'. Drove me up a wall." - rickulele, premeditatedlasagna

'Mute' for moot. A good friend of mine, who's extremely intelligent and articulate otherwise, says that. Unfortunately, it's a word she likes to use. I haven't had the heart to tell her she's pronouncing it incorrectly, and it's been three decades." NewsSad5006, common_grounder

"Jewelry." - weinthenolababy

"I hear grown adults calling wolves woofs and they're not doing it to be funny." - asexualrhino

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Baby 'writes' heartbreaking note to plane passengers sitting nearby on its first flight

"Thank you for being patient."

@callmebelly/TikTok
An excellent reminder to show kindness and patience.

The reality is that listening to a baby cry during a flight might be aggravating, but it’s nothing compared to the moans, groans, and eyerolls that the baby's parents must endure from other passengers when it happens. No matter what tips and tricks are used to try to soothe a little one’s temperament while 30,000 miles in the air, crying is almost inevitable. So, while having to ease their own child’s anxiety, moms and dads also must suffer being the pariah of the trip. What a nightmare.

Airplanes are a particularly tricky public space in which to take your children. First, unlike, say, fine dining or the opera, flying with a baby isn't always optional. Sometimes, a certain level of travel is required of your life and small children have to come along. Second, and probably worst of all, there is no escape from the airplane once you've boarded. No matter what happens; crying, puking, blowouts, or spills — you're stuck dealing with it, and the dirty looks, until the plane has landed.

Recently, one mom was apparently trying so hard to avoid upsetting her fellow flight members that she went above and beyond to essentially apologize ahead of time if her baby began to cry on its first flight.

It was a gesture that, while thoughtful, had folks really feeling for how stressed that poor mom must be.

In a clip posted to his TikTok, one of the passengers—Elliot—explained that the mom handed out small care packages to those nearby.

“She’s already so busy and took the time to make these bags for everyone,” Elliot said, before panning the camera to reveal a Ziplock bag full of candy, along with a note that made him “want to cry.”

The note read: “It’s my first flight. I made a deal to be on my best behaviour—but I can’t make any guarantees. I might cry if I get scared or if my ears start to hurt. Here are some treats to make your flight enjoyable. Thank you for being patient with us. Have a great flight.”

Elliot appeared to be choked up at the thoughtfulness on display as he examined the contents of the bags.

Like Elliot, those who watched the video felt some ambivalence at the well intentioned act. Many felt remorse that she would feel the need to appease people in this way.

“This is so sweet but also … kind of breaks my heart that we live in a world in which parents feel the need to do that.”

“Because jerk people have shamed parents into believing that they need to apologize for their kids' absolutely normal behavior. What a gem of a mom.”

“You know that sweet mom worried about this trip so much.”

“That poor mom probably spent nights awake … nervous about that flight, thinking of ways to keep strangers happy.”

"That's a mom trying so hard."

"the fact she took up valuable carry on space for these treat bags"

"Always wondered if we don’t bring kids out in public how can they learn to act in public? thank you for being so sweet to this mom"

Then again, who wouldn't appreciate some free candy and a friendly note?!


Many rallied behind the mom, arguing that making others feel more comfortable with her child being on board was in no way her responsibility.

“No mom should be apologizing. Adults can control their emotions … babies not …. Hugging this mom from a distance.”

“Dear new parents: no you don’t have to do this. Your babies have the right to exist. We all know babies cry. We know you try your best.”

Many commenters pointed out that a crying baby is far more stressful on the parent than other passengers. It's so easy to pop in your headphones and crank up your music or movie if someone else's baby is bothering you. Not so easy when you're the one responsible for soothing them!

The care package trend, sometimes called a "pre-apology", has become all the rage in recent years.

Passengers seem to universally find them adorable and fun. And some parents even enjoy the time and care it takes to make them. In a way, it can help ease the anxiety that naturally comes along with flying with a baby. It also creates a fun memory of that first flight.

But it's definitely not something any parent should feel like they have to do.

Etiquette expert Jo Hayes told What To Expect "Airplane goodie bags are all well and good for the craft-inclined or if you’re just excited to commemorate your little one’s first flight, but it's not the expectation that all parents must do this. Heaven knows, parents have enough pressure on them as is."

@xopolkadots34xo

the cutest lil flight package.. my jaw was on the floor so sweet 🥹 #babytok #travel #fyp

Luckily, there are just as many stories of fellow passengers being completely compassionate towards parents with small children—from simply choosing to throw on their headphones during a tantrum (instead of throwing one themselves) to going out of their way to comfort a baby (and taking the load off a frazzled parent in the process). These little acts of kindness make more of an impact than we probably realize. Perhaps if we incorporated more of this “it takes a village” mindset, flying could be a little bit more pleasant for everyone involved.

This article originally appeared in February. It has been updated.

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A state in the Midwest edged out Texas as the 'friendliest'—sparking a fierce debate

People note the difference between being "friendly" and being "kind."

https://www.canva.com/photos

Two friendly neighbors wave hello.

Americans are often proud of their home states for a variety of reasons. Maybe they have the best chili, whale-watching, or music scenes. Sometimes it's for more substantial reasons, like a strong statewide healthcare system or robust environmental laws. But when it comes to downright friendliness, nearly everyone thinks they're doing it right.

As a Texan living in Los Angeles, it's baffled me that people don't routinely say hello—at least not in my part of town. Even when it's just me and one other person in an elevator, they will often do anything but make eye contact. Back in Dallas, I'd have left that elevator ride with an Instagram follow and an invite to Thanksgiving. (Okay, slight exaggeration.)

As we rolled into 2025, the World Population Review (which, according to its website, reviews "solid data" and polling, "beyond population statistics to cover economics, geography, and social trends") had a big finding about the "friendliest" state.

WCCO CBS reported, "The study found that Minnesota is the friendliest state." This edged out Texas and other notoriously friendly-seeming states in that region (depending on who you ask). They continued, "So the top five is: Minnesota, Tennessee, South Carolina, Texas, and oh yes – Wyoming." They further add, "Apparently, Wyoming is so friendly that you can leave your keys in the car with the engine running and no one will touch your car."

- A report on which state is the friendliest. www.youtube.com, WCCO

The anchors then have a conversation about it, one of them sharing, "Part of why I'm still here is I'm having a great 'people experience.'" The other anchor chimes in, "I knew about the reputation coming in. I had a roommate from Minnesota, and he was like, 'You could just leave your house unlocked in your neighborhood and no one would bother you.' Everyone was just really friendly and kind." (He notes that people are a tad grumpy after a Vikings loss, though.)

There was some pushback on the "Minnesota nice" reputation, with one anchor claiming people can be passive-aggressive. At the same time, the others hadn't quite experienced that, a few in the comments shared in the sentiment.

But of course, not everyone agrees with the ranking. Over on Reddit, a recent post asks, "What's the friendliest state and why?" This got 1.6 thousand comments, and, as one might imagine, they're quite varied. One person jokes, "I predict 50 different answers, lol."

What became extremely apparent early in the comments was the attempt to find a nuanced definition of what it means to be "friendly" in the first place. There was quite a distinction between what was considered "friendly" and what was considered "kind."

One person writes, "I think New England has kind people, but they aren’t particularly 'friendly.' Folks won’t stop for idle chit-chat and small talk, but if they see you’re in actual need of assistance, they’ll move mountains to help a stranger."

maine, new england, friendliness, lighthouse, U.S. A lighthouse overlooks the ocean in Maine. Giphy

Another agrees, "I can see that. Friendly can mean different things to different people. I can't speak for most of the other states in NE, but as a Mainer, we do generally keep to ourselves, but that's more about being reserved as opposed to being standoffish, though it can look like that. We're more than happy to talk to folks and have a good time. The easiest way to start a conversation as a tourist is to ask a local what restaurant they'd recommend. You'll have a great conversation, and probably some great food too!"

A Jersey person enters the chat to say sometimes what is considered "friendly" feels like too much to them. "I’m from NJ, so I’m used to some abrasive but friendly strangers, if that makes sense. Like, I’ll hold the door for you, but call you a shmuck while I do. I travel to NC often, and the people there are generally just nice for no reason. Lots of baby name-calling – 'honey,' 'sweetheart' – even if they don’t know you. Also, courtesy is kind of just a given there. Part of me is creeped out by the overt kindness because I'm used to most people just minding their business, not being 'too much.'"

friendliness, southern charm, kindness, hello, U.S. A woman tips her hat and says hello. Giphy GIF by StickerGiant

In an Upworthy article from last year, staff writer Annie Reneau discussed the "nice vs. kind" debate, couched in an East Coast-West Coast rivalry. She quotes an X commenter, who writes, "Niceness is saying 'I'm so sorry you're cold,' while kindness may be 'Ugh, you've said that five times, here's a sweater!' Kindness is addressing the need, regardless of tone."

Many on the Reddit thread also note that friendliness and kindness can be subjective, depending on one's ethnicity, gender, etc. It's certainly not a one-size-fits-all experience. And at the end of the day, the first commenter was correct. Nearly every state was represented with excellent reasons for why its state was lovely.

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