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Think catcalls are compliments? A music video flips the script to show why that's not the case.

Some men say they'd love to get catcalled. Jamie Kilstein puts that to the test.

Think catcalls are compliments? A music video flips the script to show why that's not the case.

By age 17, 85% of U.S. women are likely to have experienced some form of street harassment.

This is just one of several disturbing findings in Cornell University's 2014 Hollaback International Street Harassment Survey Project study. Others include that 11.6% of respondents report their first encounter with harassment happening before age 11, and the fact that 77% of U.S. women under age 40 reported having been "followed by a man or group of men in a way that made them feel unsafe during the past year." Wow.


But one of the saddest (and most common) pieces of advice given to women? "It's just a compliment." (Seriously. Look at some of the comments from men featured in one of our past articles.)


In a new music video, Jamie Kilstein flips the street harassment script, imagining a world where men are "complimented."

"I think guys legit think, 'Well, I would like being called handsome or whatever,' so what's wrong with that?" he tells me via e-mail. "But the reality is the men who say those things don't realize that it's not just one guy who says, 'Sorry to bother you, but you're really pretty.' That might be one of eight dudes who go up to that one woman in one day. And they all don't sound like that. Most don't."


"So he takes a deep breath, and suddenly he hears her..." GIFs from Jamie Kilstein.

It'd be great if we lived in a world where people could just compliment strangers. But we don't, and it's complicated.

"In a perfect world we would live and respect each other, and every once in a while you might be struck by such beauty that you have to approach this stranger, tell them how awestruck you are, fall in love, and have 2.5 kids."

That does sound like a pretty awesome world. But reality is more like...

"I have friends who have been spit on for not saying 'hi,' who have been followed, who have been threatened. OH FUN! I'm sure guys want that. Live in constant terror? SEXY!"

"Maybe show a little skin? Show what the good Lord gave you."

And sometimes "compliments" turn deadly. Sadly, there's no way to distinguish until it's too late.

Last year, Mary "Unique" Spears, a 27-year-old mother of three, was shot and killed after declining a stranger's advances. And less than two months after promoting an editorial titled "Hey ladies! Catcalls are flattering — deal with it," the New York Post reported a story about a 26-year-old woman having her throat slashed after turning down a stranger's request for a date.

"Women aren't there to put on a show for us. Who wants to be told to smile as they're walking through NYC?" says Jamie. "It's such a creepy thing to go up to a stranger and request."

"You got some fat b*lls? Why don't you jiggle those fat b*lls over here to mommy."

Take a listen to Jamie's (very NSFW) trip into the a world where men get "complimented" below.

Seriously, though, this has some pretty explicit language, so if that's not your thing, you might want to pass on this video.

Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash
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Glenda moved to Houston from Ohio just before the pandemic hit. She didn't know that COVID-19-related delays would make it difficult to get her Texas driver's license and apply for unemployment benefits. She quickly found herself in an impossible situation — stranded in a strange place without money for food, gas, or a job to provide what she needed.

Alone, hungry, and scared, Glenda dialed 2-1-1 for help. The person on the other end of the line directed her to the Houston-based nonprofit Bread of Life, founded by St. John's United Methodist pastors Rudy and Juanita Rasmus.

For nearly 30 years, Bread of Life has been at the forefront of HIV/AIDS prevention, eliminating food insecurity, providing permanent housing to formerly homeless individuals and disaster relief.

Glenda sat in her car for 20 minutes outside of the building, trying to muster up the courage to get out and ask for help. She'd never been in this situation before, and she was terrified.

When she finally got out, she encountered Eva Thibaudeau, who happened to be walking down the street at the exact same time. Thibaudeau is the CEO of Temenos CDC, a nonprofit multi-unit housing development also founded by the Rasmuses, with a mission to serve Midtown Houston's homeless population.

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Eight months into the coronavirus pandemic, many of us are feeling the weight of it growing heavier and heavier. We miss normal life. We miss our friends. We miss travel. We miss not having to mentally measure six feet everywhere we go.

Maybe that's what was on Edmund O'Leary's mind when he tweeted on Friday. Or maybe he had some personal issues or challenges he was dealing with. After all, it's not like people didn't struggle pre-COVID. Now, we just have the added stress of a pandemic on top of our normal mental and emotional upheavals.

Whatever it was, Edmund decided to reach out to Twitter and share what he was feeling.

"I am not ok," he wrote. "Feeling rock bottom. Please take a few seconds to say hello if you see this tweet. Thank you."

O'Leary didn't have a huge Twitter following, but somehow his tweet started getting around quickly. Response after response started flowing in from all over the world, even from some famous folks. Thousands of people seemed to resonate with Edmund's sweet and honest call for help and rallied to send him support and good cheer.

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Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash
True

Glenda moved to Houston from Ohio just before the pandemic hit. She didn't know that COVID-19-related delays would make it difficult to get her Texas driver's license and apply for unemployment benefits. She quickly found herself in an impossible situation — stranded in a strange place without money for food, gas, or a job to provide what she needed.

Alone, hungry, and scared, Glenda dialed 2-1-1 for help. The person on the other end of the line directed her to the Houston-based nonprofit Bread of Life, founded by St. John's United Methodist pastors Rudy and Juanita Rasmus.

For nearly 30 years, Bread of Life has been at the forefront of HIV/AIDS prevention, eliminating food insecurity, providing permanent housing to formerly homeless individuals and disaster relief.

Glenda sat in her car for 20 minutes outside of the building, trying to muster up the courage to get out and ask for help. She'd never been in this situation before, and she was terrified.

When she finally got out, she encountered Eva Thibaudeau, who happened to be walking down the street at the exact same time. Thibaudeau is the CEO of Temenos CDC, a nonprofit multi-unit housing development also founded by the Rasmuses, with a mission to serve Midtown Houston's homeless population.

Keep Reading Show less

The subject of late-term abortions has been brought up repeatedly during this election season, with President Trump making the outrageous claim that Democrats are in favor of executing babies.

This message grossly misrepresents what late-term abortion actually is, as well as what pro-choice advocates are actually "in favor of." No one is in favor of someone having a specific medical procedure—that would require being involved in someone's individual medical care—but rather they are in favor of keeping the government out of decisions about specific medical procedures.

Pete Buttigieg, who has become a media surrogate for the Biden campaign—and quite an effective one at that—addressed this issue in a Fox News town hall when he was on the campaign trail himself. When Chris Wallace asked him directly about late-term abortions, Buttigieg answered Wallace's questions is the best way possible.

"Do you believe, at any point in pregnancy, whether it's at six weeks or eight weeks or 24 weeks or whenever, that there should be any limit on a woman's right to have an abortion?" Wallace asked.

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When it comes to the topic of race, we all have questions. And sometimes, it honestly can be embarrassing to ask perfectly well-intentioned questions lest someone accuse you of being ignorant, or worse, racist, for simply admitting you don't know the answer.

America has a complicated history with race. For as long as we've been a country, our culture, politics and commerce have been structured in a way to deny our nation's past crimes, minimize the structural and systemic racism that still exists and make the entire discussion one that most people would rather simply not have.

For example, have you ever wondered what's really behind the term Black Pride? Is it an uplifting phrase for the Black community or a divisive term? Most people instinctively put the term "White Pride" in a negative context. Is there such a thing as non-racist, racial pride for white people? And while we're at it, what about Asian people, Native Americans, and so on?

Yes, a lot of people raise these questions with bad intent. But if you've ever genuinely wanted an answer, either for yourself or so that you best know how to handle the question when talking to someone with racist views, writer/director Michael McWhorter put together a short, simple and irrefutable video clip explaining why "White Pride" isn't a real thing, why "Black Pride" is and all the little details in between.


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