+
A PERSONAL MESSAGE FROM UPWORTHY
We are a small, independent media company on a mission to share the best of humanity with the world.
If you think the work we do matters, pre-ordering a copy of our first book would make a huge difference in helping us succeed.
GOOD PEOPLE Book
upworthy
Family

Help is on the way for a desperate mom who couldn't find size 23 shoes for her teenage son

Her son Eric Kilburn Jr. is a 6'10" freshman in high school.

size 23 shoes, eric kilburn, big feet

A size 21 Nike shoe made for Tacko Fall.

A local reporter at Hometown Life shared a unique and heartfelt story on March 16 about a mother struggling to find shoes that fit her 14-year-old son. The story resonated with parents everywhere; now, her son is getting the help he desperately needs. It's a wonderful example of people helping a family that thought they had nowhere to turn.

When Eric Kilburn Jr. was born, his mother, Rebecca’s OBGYN, told her that he had the “biggest feet I’ve ever seen in my life. Do not go out and buy baby shoes because they’re not gonna fit,’” Rebecca told Today.com. Fourteen years later, it’s almost impossible to find shoes that fit the 6’10” freshman—he needs a size 23.


The teen's height doesn't stem from a gland issue; he comes from a family of tall people. Both his parents are over 6 feet tall.

Eric plays football for Goodrich High School in Goodrich, Michigan, but doesn’t wear cleats, which led to a sprained ankle. He also suffers from ingrown toenails that are so severe he’s had two nails on his biggest toes permanently removed.

Last year, the family was lucky enough to stumble upon five pairs of size 21 shoes at a Nike outlet store. It was discovered they were made especially for Tacko Fall, the NBA player with some of the most enormous feet in the game. To put things in perspective, Shaquille O’Neal wears a size 22.

However, Eric soon grew out of those as well. The family was left with one more option: have orthopedic shoes made for Eric at the cost of $1,500 with no guarantee he won’t quickly grow out of those as well.

After his mother’s heartfelt plea to Hometown Life, the family got much-needed help from multiple companies, including Under Armour and PUMA, who are sending representatives to Michigan to measure his feet for custom shoes.

CAT has reached out to make him a custom pair of boots. Eric hasn't had any boots to wear for the past five Michigan winters.

Kara Pattison started a GoFundMe campaign on behalf of the family to help them purchase custom shoes for “the rest of the time Eric has these feet.” It has raised nearly $20,000 for the family in just over a week.

“The success of this fundraiser is well beyond what was ever expected,” Pattison wrote on the site on March 18. “The Kilburns plan to open a bank account dedicated to Eric's future footwear and some specialized sports equipment. He can use this to get a helmet that fits for football along with pads. They will also look into a football and track jersey for him.”

The sense of relief felt by Rebecca, Eric and the rest of the Kilburn family must be incredible. It has to be frustrating to be unable to provide your child with something as basic as footwear.

“It’s been overwhelming,” Rebecca told Hometown Life. “I have been this puddle of emotions, all of them good…It’s the coolest thing to be able to say we did it! He has shoes! I am not usually a crier, but I have been in a constant state of happy tears…We are so grateful.”


This article originally appeared on 03.23.23

A child being rude.

Sometimes, it can feel like half of parenting is repeating yourself over and over again, asking your child to brush their teeth or take a dish from the living room to the sink. It’s exhausting and makes you feel like a nag. Don't you wish there was a simple way to make your kids listen the first time?

Dr. Rebecca Kennedy, aka “Dr. Becky,” is a clinical psychologist and founder and CEO of Good Inside who says she has a quick way to make your kids more cooperative and less rude. Talk about killing two soul-crushing birds with one parenting stone.

Dr. Beckly got into psychology after growing up with anorexia as a teenager.

“Okay, no matter how old your kid is, you can use this 15-second tip to decrease rudeness and increase cooperation,” she says in a TikTok video with over 32,000 views. “Find your child today and ask them this question. 'Hey, I was just wondering, what could I do better as your parent?'”


The psychologist says that even if the child has a random or impractical answer such as “Let me stay up ‘til midnight” or “I’d like to eat macaroni and cheese for breakfast, lunch and dinner,” just to listen. Simply by listening, you can change your child’s behavior.

She says we should also ask more questions to further the conversation: “Tell me more. What would that be like?”

Want to improve your relationship with your kid in less than 15 seconds? Watch this reel for a quick-win strategy. 

@drbeckyatgoodinside

Want to improve your relationship with your kid in less than 15 seconds? Watch this reel for a quick-win strategy. The best part: When we use strategies like this in calm moments, we reduce the frequency of difficult moments with our kids. Of course, I’m a realist… I know you need in-the-moment strategies too! Cue: My Conquering Problem Behaviors Workshop. You’ll get an entire toolbox of in-the-moment and outside-the-moment strategies for reducing outbursts and strengthening your bond with your kid. Learn more in the link in bio!

“I mean, imagine your boss coming to you randomly and asking how they could be a better manager to you. Just by asking the question and listening,” she continued. Dr. Becky says that asking our kids how we’re doing as parents communicates three essential ideas: “I care about you. I respect you. I'm invested in this relationship.”

This type of questioning builds a connection with a child that can spill over into other behaviors. “You're building connection. And with more connection always comes more cooperation,” she ends the video.

The big takeaway from the video is that when we enhance our connection with our kids, they will be less likely to disobey or be rude because they feel heard and respected, so there’s no need to act out. They will also return that respect by listening to you when you have a request, such as taking out the trash or putting down their phone and coming to dinner.

Some people in the comments got funny responses when they asked their kids what they could improve. “I asked my 5yr old. I got a mildly scathing look and she said ‘erm, maybe try and burn dinner less next time?’” Collette wrote. “My 5 yo told me to look better and get a haircut,” Mark Amend added.

Dr. Becky’s quick question is a great way for parents to strengthen their relationships when things are going well instead of trying to forge connections during conflict. It’s a great reminder that even when parenting, an ounce of prevention is a pound of cure.

Dr. Becky sums up the importance of prevention in her TikTok caption: “When we use strategies like this in calm moments, we reduce the frequency of difficult moments with our kids,” she wrote.


This article originally appeared on 6.6.24

America's Got talent/Youtube

“How do we know that the dog is a real dog?” asked Simon Cowell.

What dog owner wouldn’t want to jam out to Queen with their pup while the world watches? Of course, our version probably wouldn’t be nearly as impressive as what Roni Sagi and her black and white border collie, aptly named Rhythm, did for “America's Got Talent” on Tuesday.

First off, audiences knew they’d instantly be in for a treat when Sagi and Rhythm recreated the band’s famous pose for “Bohemian Rhapsody.” But it only got better from there, in a routine that featured a mash-up of “Bohemian Rhapsody” and “Don’t Stop Me Now.”


The dance duo wowed judges and audiences alike with synchronized steps, turns, flips…and even a cool bridge pose trick (seriously, this was a dog owner’s dream come to life). Simon Cowell jokingly asked “How do we know that the dog is a real dog?” because Rhythm was just that good.

Sagi would later end up sharing that Rhythm earned his name from an early age, already tapping his little feet on her bed at only 6 weeks old. By that point, Sagi had already had experience training therapy dogs, which undoubtedly gave her a good foundation for working with her little “tornado storm.”

Perhaps it should come as that much of a surprise that Rhythm is so gifted. After all, border collies are notorious for being able to pick up skills quickly, and there have been several border collies that have broken world records—including records for intelligence, balance and skateboarding (yes, really).

But Sagi seems to credit their chemistry less on Rhythm’s species traits, and more on his individual personality.

“It’s so much fun to have a partner that wants [to perform] as much as you,” she said. “He wants to do it all, and he wants to do it now, and he wants to do it as good as he can.”

Down in the comments, online viewers shared their praises—and awe—for Rhythm’s performance.

“This was the most amazing dog act I've seen!” one person wrote.

“That precious dog Rhythm is SO talented and smart!!! I don’t understand how he knows what to do when his back is to her?!! This dog is truly dancing and just extremely talented!!!” added another.

Still another said, “This dog is the most energetic and enthusiastic I've ever seen.”

Of course, Rhythm wasn't getting all the love. One person wrote, “I don't usually like dog acts, but this was impressive. Roni is very creative with what she does and obviously a great dancer herself and trainer.”

Maybe we can’t get all dogs to perform quite on this level, but it does show us just how amazing man’s best friend really is.

Watch the full act below:

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Family

13 comics use 'science' to hilariously illustrate the frustrations of parenting.

"Newton's First Law of Parenting: A child at rest will remain at rest ... until you need your iPad back."

All images by Jessica Ziegler

Kids grab everywhere.


Norine Dworkin-McDaniel's son came home from school one day talking about Newton's first law of motion.

He had just learned it at school, her son explained as they sat around the dinner table one night. It was the idea that "an object at rest will remain at rest until acted on by an external force."

"It struck me that it sounded an awful lot like him and his video games," she joked.


A writer by trade and always quick to turn a phrase, Norine grabbed a pen and scribbled some words:

"Newton's First Law of Parenting: A child at rest will remain at rest ... until you need your iPad back."

And just like that, she started creating "The Science of Parenthood," a series that names and identifies hilarious, universal parenting struggles. She put in a quick call to her friend Jessica Ziegler, a visual and graphics expert, and together the two set out to bring the project to life.

Here are some of their discoveries:

1. Newton's first law of parenting

parents, babies, parenthood

A taste of the “gimmies."

2. The sleep geometry theorem

teenagers, science of parenthood, science

There’s plenty of room.

3. The baby fluids effusion rule

baby fluids, adults, babies

Duck.

4. The carnival arc

avoidance, county fair, town

Can we go?

5. The Archimedes bath-time principle

bath time, bubbles, clean up

Clean up the clean up.

6. Schrödinger's backpack

homework, school, responsibility

Homework... ehh.

7. The naptime disruption theorem

naps, doorbells, sleep deprivation

Who needs sleep. It’s rhetorical.

8. Calculation disintegration

math, education, calculator

I have a calculator on my phone.

9. Chuck e-conomics

economics, resources, toys

How much does that cost?

10. Plate tectonics

food, picky eaters, fussy eaters

Where’s the chicken tenders?

11. Silicaphobia

beach, sand, vacation

Oh good, sunburns.

12. Delusions of launder

laundry, chores, home utilities

When did we get all these clothes?

13. The Costco contradiction

Costco, name brands, comic

I want them now, not then.

Norine and Jessica's work struck a nerve with parents everywhere.

Norine said almost every parent who sees the cartoons has a similar reaction: a quiet moment of recognition, followed by a huge laugh as they recognize their own families in the illustrations.

But is there more to it than just getting a few chuckles? You bet, Norine and Jessica said.

"Even, at the worst possible moments, you're standing there, your child has just vomited all over you, or you've opened up the diaper and your kid is sitting waist deep in liquid ****. Even at that moment, it's not really that bad," Norine said. "You will be able to laugh at this at some point."

"It gets better. You're not alone in this parenting thing."


This article originally appeared on 11.30.16

People reveal the 'unwritten rules' of their households and they're delightful bizarre

"If you have a cat on your lap and want something from the kitchen someone else has to get it for you. Cat must not be disturbed."

Rule: The cat must not be disturbed.

In our house, we have a rule called "I Have a Cat." If one of our two cats is sitting in your lap, you are automatically exempt from having to do anything. Everyone else in the house has to serve you until the cat decides to vacate.

This rule isn't written anywhere, and we never actively decided it was a rule, it just became one because no one would dare to disturb Princess Nala when she's comfy and cuddly.

We're apparently not the only family with such a rule. Most families have unwritten household rules that others might see as strange when "enforced," which is why when someone on Reddit asked, "What’s an unwritten rule in your household that would seem bizarre to outsiders?" people delivered with some delightful, hilarious and sometimes even helpful examples.

Here are some of the best:

The 'loud noise' and 'I’m ok' rules

If you know you’re going to make a loud noise, say dropping a heavy bag down the stairs you had to yell 'loud noise' to warn everyone that the noise was coming and planned

If you made a loud noise unplanned you had to yell 'I’m OK' so no one came running or did come running I’d you were NOT ok. Side note this rule was created when grandpa dropped a toilet on his finger."

"Any loud noise coming from the shower/bathtub must quickly be followed by an audible 'oh sh_t'/'dammit'/'heck!' and change to the shower spray sound, proving movement.

Failure to acknowledge will result in a 'you good in there?' from the outside party."

Rules for getting out of doing dishes

"This is at my mom's place: If you are wearing long sleeve shirts you are exempt from doing the dishes."

"We just had a rule that once the dishwasher (one of us kids - the actual dishwasher was used as storage for go cups since mom was convinced they were shitty at cleaning dishes) was done with all the dishes that had been cleared from the table and shut the water off, any additional dishes were not their responsibility. This led to the designated dishwasher racing through doing the dishes and slower eaters racing to finish their food. “Haha sucker - the water’s off!” was commonly heard growing up."

"When we don’t feel like cleaning the kitchen entirely after dinner or we leave junk in the living room, whatever the case may be, we’re obligated to declare 'who closed last night!?' And then we blame it on the baby."

The empty paper towel roll goes to the doggo—appropriately announced

"When you use the last paper towel from the roll you have to take the cardboard tube and yell 'do-ta-do' in it and then give it to the dog when he comes running so he can shred it!"

"We call these cardboard bones and they also require some sort of announcement through it before giving it to the dog."

"Growing up we'd blow into it like trying to blow a trumpet because it made the dog go apeshit. Then you 'beat' the dog with it along her back which gets her more excited, then you give it to her for destruction."

dog being hand fedGotta pay the dog tax.Photo by Karolina Kaboompics/Pexels

Dog taxes must be paid

"If you get ice from the freezer for whatever reason, you must pay the ice tax to the dogs."

"We have to pay the ice tax AND cheese tax. Brutal."

"It's the peanut butter tax and the cheese tax in my house. My dog is so psyched for the cheese tax that she comes running from pretty much anywhere in the house if she hears something that sounds like crinkling plastic in the fridge."

"We have ice tax, cheese tax, popcorn tax, bell pepper tax. These pups are ruthless!"

Meow back, always

"If a cat meows at you, you meow back. It's impolite not to answer."

"I have full on conversations with my friends cat and you can tell by the tones he uses he is actually speaking to you lol it's hilarious and I never get tired of it. I usually just keep meowing back and forth until I can tell he's had enough chit chat 😆"

"This is the only way to get my cat to stop meowing at me. If I ignore him he'll keep going. If I get up to see what he wants, he just looks at me. If I meow back a few times, he comes into the room I'm in and chills with me."

If I have to come find it for you when I just told you exactly where it is…

"If you tell me you can’t find something after I’ve told you EXACTLY WHERE IT IS, and I walk over there and find it EXACTLY WHERE I TOLD YOU IT WAS, I get to hit you with it."

"This is also a rule in my house, which led to this exchange -

'Mom, I need help finding something!'

'Okay, but if I find it right away, I get to hit you with it!'

'NEVERMIND I'LL FIND THE SCISSORS MYSELF.'"

"I started charging my kids $5 finder's fee each time."


board game piecesWinner cleans up!Photo by Pixabay/Pexels


Game winner does the cleans up

"Winner of a board game is charged with putting said game away."

"My family did this too! It's a great way to minimize competition drama because the winner gets to gloat about winning while tidying up and the rest get to gloat about not having to tidy up."

"This is so much better than the tradition my siblings and I got into of actively making messes while singing 'Loser picks it up!'

We grew up into civilized people, but this rule would have set us on the path sooner."

"The real competition would be making it clear you COULD win, but instead forced the cleanup on someone else."

You complain or give unsolicited advice, the job's yours

"If someone is voluntarily doing a chore, no one shall tell them how to do it differently unless damage is going to be incurred. If unsolicited advice is given without the intent to actively roll up sleeves and help, the task then belongs to the giver of the unsolicited advice."

"If more people tried to adopt even a fraction of this mind set then so many households would be so much happier. Yes weaponized incompetence is a thing and messed up when people do it but many times it's just priorities and preferences are different. My spouse folds the towels differently than I do. In our case it doesn't impact anything. So why would I get on their case about something so benign and add stress for no reason."

cat sitting on someone's lapThe Cat Lap Rule is universal, it seems.Photo by Andrew Kota/Pexels

Sorry, can't. I have a cat.

"If you have a cat on your lap and want something from the kitchen someone else has to get it for you. Cat must not be disturbed."

"I'd add we had as many as 7 cats at a time growing up so often everyone had a cat on their lap so the youngest cat would be the one chosen to be moved. Senior cats had great privilege."

"We call this 'Cat Rule' and over the years it has sub rules. For example, one cannot invoke Cat Rule more than three times in one lap sitting 😂"

"We call it being 'cat-atonic.'"

"We call that 'the prime directive'-- a sleeping cat must not be disturbed."

"We call that, 'the sacred law' 😂 Our cat is only affectionate on her terms so if she’s cuddling us, it’s a very special moment."

"We call this feline paralysis, love seeing everyone else’s names for this rule!"

And these extras, just for funsies…

"Bandit, our aged Great Dane, gets the cushion on the far right of the orange couch. No exceptions, no asking him to move, that’s his spot."

"Sometimes, my cat will carry a ball toy into the room and meow loudly. As soon as she drops the ball, every human in the house must clap and go 'Yaaayy!!' It is law."

"If you are going to use the kitchen tongs you must perform an OSHA approved test click to ensure that they are functional."

"In our household, the unwritten rule is that you must perform a full interpretive dance routine to earn the right to use the TV remote. It keeps the peace and provides nightly entertainment."

"You have to choose the topic of your fortune cookie before you read it. "this is about my new job" many a big life decision has been made this way.

Inside spiders are named Franklin. Outside spiders are named Fronklin. They are all good boys."


Family

When should kids get a smartphone? Backed my science, concerned parents now have the answer.

Parents don't want their kids "left out." But what are they really signing up for?

Four kids in school staring at their smartphones.

If you ask 20 parents the best age for a child to get a smartphone, you’ll probably get 20 different answers. That’s because we have yet to come to a consensus on when children are ready to have 24-hour-a-day contact with their friends and be subject to a brain-altering deluge of information algorithmically distributed to them by big tech companies.

Smartphones also expose users to all the harmful material available online and make them more vulnerable to bullying.

According to Common Sense Media, 42 percent of 10-year-olds report having smartphones. By age 12, that number increases to 71 percent; by age 14, it’s 91 percent. But what is the best age to give a child a smartphone so that they can stay in touch with their friends while also protecting their mental health?

When should parents give their child a smartphone?

An organization started by Brooke Shannon, a mother of 3, aims to set a new standard for parents everywhere. Wait Until 8th draws a line in the sand by saying the earliest a child should have a smartphone is after they've completed the 8th grade. “That is a reasonable time for parents to wait, and everyone will make a different decision for their family. Of course, the longer you can wait, the better," Mark SooHoo, a parent volunteer for the Wait Until 8th movement, told Upworthy.


SooHoo says social scientist Jonathan Haidt’s recent landmark book, “The Anxious Generation: How the Rewriting of Childhood is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness,” lays a strong foundation for delaying smartphone use as long as possible.

In the book, Haidt cites research that shows how, right around 2010, the U.S. and other developed nations saw an astronomical spike in mental health problems among young people, including self-harm, suicide, psychological distress, anxiety and depression. The spike perfectly coincides with the adaptation of smartphone technology and the subsequent decline in time spent with friends.

Or, as Haidt would write, the dawn of the phone-based childhood era.



Sapien Labs performed a study on nearly 28,000 young adults that found the age at which they were given smartphones or tablet technology “strongly correlates” with their mental health status. “The later the age at which these young adults first got a phone or tablet that they could carry with them in childhood, the better their mental well-being as adults,” the study states. "That's the core of what we're saying,” SooHoo told Upworthy. “This is all about the mental health of our children."

To help parents and children commit to the timeframe, Wait Until 8th created an online tool that makes it easy for parents to support each other in the decision. When you sign the Wait Until 8th pledge, you will be notified after at least 10 families from your child’s school and grade sign up, too. This gives parents strength in numbers to push back against their child’s requests for a smartphone. It also reduces the social pressure on kids without smartphones so they don’t feel left out.

wait until 8th, smartphones and kids, parentingWon't my child be left out without a smartphone?via Wait Until 8th/Instagram


SooHoo says community involvement gives parents more confidence in their decisions.

But what about parents who give their kids smartphones so they never lose touch with them? SooHoo says smartphones aren’t the only way to stay connected to your child. "This pledge is for smartphones only,” he told Upworthy. “Get them a smartwatch, get them a flip phone. Even something as simple as an AirTAg can tell you where your child is."

Do children without smartphones feel left out?

Many parents eventually cave in and get their kids phones because they don’t want them to feel left out. "Yes, I understand it's a valid concern,” SooHoo told Upworthy, but he has a different view of what being “left out” means. “But I do want my child to be left out of bullying. I do want my child to be left out of negative body issues. I do want my child left out of the harmful effects of social media."

"These smartphones are designed by some of the world's most brilliant user interface experts who design them just like you would a Vegas casino to keep you hooked. To keep your attention. To keep those dopamine hits coming,” SooHoo continued. “So, yes, I do want my child left out of that."

What’s worse? For a child to be left out of a Snapchat conversation with friends or brought into a world where they can be easily bullied and develop a severe mental health problem?

parents and smartphones, kids and smartphones, kids and technology.Boys sitting down and staring at their phones.via Pixabay/Pexels

Katie Degen, another Wait Until 8th volunteer, noticed a massive change in her son after giving him a smartphone.

“We gave him one when he was in fifth grade and we saw a difference right away,” she told The Record North Shore. “When we took it away for any reason, we would see our old kid again, the one who was engaged with the world. Then we’d give the phone back and see the difference again.”

Since then, she has replaced her son’s phone with a smartwatch. “It’s been a real game changer,” she added. “He’s talking more with his friends, and it’s actually changed for the rest of the family. We all use our phones less and interact more.”

Understandably, parents have different views on when or why to give their child a smartphone. But it’s becoming impossible to deny the impact they have on a child’s mental health. Smartphones are tools that connect people so it’s essential to have a collective answer to this collective problem. Wait Until 8th is one of the first organizations to promote a healthy way for kids to adapt to technology while empowering parents to make it happen together.

Visit Wait Until 8th's website for more information and to join the 60,000 parents in 50 states who have pledged to wait until at least 8th grade to give their child a smartphone.