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Many folks with HIV stay silent about their status. The reaction to Charlie Sheen's story shows why.

Many people say the hardest part of living with HIV is the stigma. Here's some easy ways to treat HIV-positive people with compassion.

This morning, actor Charlie Sheen made a huge announcement: He's HIV-positive.

Photo by MIchael Buckner/Getty Images.


The move comes after the Internet exploded yesterday with speculation about the actor's status after the National Enquirer promised a "bombshell world exclusive" about the actor's private life.

All totally valid criticisms of Sheen aside, no one deserves to have their personal information shared without their permission. Sheen probably wouldn't even have shared his status without the threat of extortion hanging over his head, because there is still so much stigma and so many misconceptions surrounding an HIV diagnosis. But now that he's come forward, it's significant that he was able to share his story in his words before anyone else could.

Individuals with HIV should be able to live without shame and with the freedom to be open about their lived experiences.

Reactions to Sheen's announcement show we still have a long way to go to overcome stigma about the virus.

Sheen shares that he was diagnosed about four years ago. Why did he keep it secret for so long? Uh, the cover of this magazine might give a hint.

Photo via National Enquirer.

Treating someone's HIV status — a private medical condition that is likely irrelevant to everyone who'll read it — as a sensationalist gossip topic isn't just gross, it's wrong. Not to mention: HIV and AIDS aren't interchangeable diseases — to proclaim, on the cover of a magazine no less, that Charlie Sheen not wanting to disclose his HIV diagnosis is an "AIDS COVER-UP" wildly misrepresents what an HIV diagnosis means in 2015. Media reactions like this are why he and millions of other Americans are hesitant to disclose their HIV status.

Misconceptions and stigma about HIV play a large factor in why many with the diagnosis stay silent, often forever.

“We're finding, despite the fact that we've been living with this disease for 30 years, that the greatest challenge we're facing is stigma," David Furnish, chairman of the Elton John AIDS Foundation, said in an interview with The Advocate. "[That's] the biggest hurdle we have to overcome."

Stigma against HIV-positive people is a large reason why discrimination is so rampant. Loss of housing, employment, and close relationships is common for people with HIV or AIDS in ways that many folks with other life-threatening conditions don't face.


Retired NBA player Magic Johnson publicly disclosed his HIV-positive status in 1991. Since then, he's become an outspoken advocate for safer sex and HIV/AIDS prevention. Photo by Stephen Dunn/Getty Images.

Here's what you need to know about HIV:

Stigma is a tricky thing that many people don't realize influences how they treat someone — because it can seem so normal. Remembering these facts will help you destigmatize HIV and AIDS when you find yourself in conversations about it in the real world.

1. HIV and AIDS are not interchangeable.

HIV stands for human immunodeficiency virus, which is a tiny organism in the body.

AIDS (acquired immunodeficiency syndrome) refers to the condition one can get after HIV completely compromises their immune system.

An individual can have HIV for many years and never get AIDS. Only a doctor can make the call whether someone has AIDS. Thanks to progress in medical care, people in the U.S. who take antiviral treatments often never get AIDS.

2. The risks of contracting HIV through everyday contact like handholding or sharing a swimming pool is minimal.

HIV is not spread through the air, casual touch, tears, sweat, or saliva. So it's OK to use the same bathroom, eating utensils, and water fountain. In the U.S., the most common way people are infected is through penetrative sex, which is why it's important to use condoms.

But it's not just through sexual activity. There are reasons to be extra cautious if, say, you have a cut on your hand and you help your friend with HIV bandage a cut on her hand. HIV is transmitted through certain body fluids, like blood, coming into contact with the bloodstream, damaged tissue, or a mucous membrane like the mouth.

3. HIV is not a punishment.

No one deserves to get HIV. It is not a condemnation from God or some sort of punishment for certain acts that others may not approve of. When you read your magazines in the checkout aisle of the grocery store, don't buy into all the correlations between Charlie Sheen's history of being a "womanizer" or his relationships with sex workers meant to imply that his HIV infection is a punishment for that. It only takes one bad needle, one broken condom, or one partner to transmit the disease.

If you cite Sheen's wild past and say he got what he deserved, that assumption reflects on all people who have HIV, no matter how careful they were in their lives. It reinforces the myth that HIV-positive people are being punished for bad decisions, a stigma that they face every day.

4. People of all genders and sexual orientations can get HIV.

For a long time, HIV was seen as something only gay and bisexual men should worry about. But according to the CDC, 23% of people with HIV are women. Of women who were newly infected, 84% were from heterosexual contact.

While most folks get HIV from sexual contact, remember that there are other ways people get infected, like being born with it or through a blood transfusion. In general, it's just best not to assume how they got HIV. It's irrelevant at this point anyway, right?

5. You can't tell whether someone is HIV-positive by how they look.

Just because someone doesn't "look sick" doesn't mean they're HIV-negative. Many HIV-positive people can be symptom-free for years before discovering they are infected. That's why it's so important to get tested regularly. You'll be able to get early medical intervention and prevent inadvertently infecting someone.

Actor Danny Pintauro, best known for his role as Jonathan Bower on the TV show "Who's the Boss" as a child, came out as HIV-positive this year. Photo by Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images.

Here's how to handle conversations about HIV and AIDS in real life to stop stigma in its tracks:

Be mindful of your language when talking about HIV. A lot of common terms can reinforce stigma. For example, the term "clean" when referring to negative HIV status implies that someone who is HIV-positive is dirty.

Treat a person respectfully when they disclose their status. Be compassionate in your response and make sure to respect their privacy. Their disclosure is not consent to being an open book about sexual history, medical treatment, or how they contracted the virus. And just because they disclose their status to you doesn't mean they're giving you permission to reveal it to everyone else, too.

Do not speculate on or disclose someone's HIV status without permission. Basically, don't do what the Enquirer did with Charlie Sheen.

Get tested. Knowledge is power. Visit this link to find a place near you. A lot of places offer free testing, which can be completed in a few minutes!



Olympic gold medalist Greg Louganis tested positive for HIV in 1988. He is an advocate for LGBT and people diagnosed with HIV/AIDS. Photo by Jason Kempin/Getty Images for The Point Foundation.

Educating yourself about HIV just doesn't make you more knowledgeable, it makes you a real force in reducing HIV stigma.

HIV stigma is very real — and it has dangerous consequences. It keeps people from getting treatment and but also getting the care and support from others that they (all of us?) need. Many studies have found there are significant public health risks because of stigma.

We're probably never going to persuade everyone to treat Charlie Sheen's diagnosis with respect and dignity or prevent them from making stupid TIGER BLOOD jokes. But the lessons we learn from how we talk about Sheen's announcement have real-world repercussions on non-famous people living with HIV stigma every day.

If we work hard to reveal the reality — that living with HIV isn't a death sentence, that there's nothing to fear from HIV-positive individuals — we can create a world where folks can divulge their status on their own terms. It'll be a better, safer world for everyone.

empty nester, empty nesters, declutter, decluttering, decluttering tips

Mom and empty nester shares her tips for decluttering her home.

Deep cleaning and decluttering a home is a daunting task—especially for empty nesters. After spending a lifetime creating memories and living together under one roof, doing a big declutter can take an emotional toll.

It's a milestone that many empty nesters know the sting of. And in a cleaning community on Reddit, a 51-year-old mom and recent empty nester shared her experience cleaning and decluttering her home after entering this new phase of life.


"In my entire life, my house has always been messy. I mean, I didn’t have a disaster-level situation going on, but if someone dropped by unannounced, it would’ve been super embarrassing," she shared. "When my kids were younger, we had a housekeeper because I just couldn’t keep up. Now that we’re empty nesters, I realized I never really learned how to keep house."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

She explained that the book Unf*ck Your Habitat: You're Better Than Your Mess played an integral part in helping her declutter—and offered eight helpful tips to fellow empty nesters looking to organize their new lives.

1. Put stuff away, not down.

Her first tip is the key to decluttering.

"Whatever you have goes right back where it’s supposed to go when I’m done with it," she notes.

2. Do laundry every day.

And she doesn't just wash and dry her laundry when doing it.

"Just one load, start to finish. Wash, dry, fold, and put away," she shares. "Also, no chair or floor laundry. It gets put in the hamper or hung back up. No clothes are ever out."

3. I make the bed every day.

The benefits keep on giving by doing this, she notes.

"It just makes my bedroom look cleaner and I smile every time I come in my room," she writes. "Plus we aren’t fighting over the covers when we get in because the bed is straightened out."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

4. Do a quick daily clean-up of commonly used spaces.

She cleans the places that she and her husband use frequently.

"I keep a stack of cleaning rags in my master bath because it’s the only bathroom that’s used every single day. Every night, I spray the counter, wipe everything down, put everything back (that my husband leaves out), and wipe the mirror," she explains. "I also wipe down the toilet. I find that I don’t need a huge, big cleaning of this space because I’m keeping it up daily. Same goes for the kitchen."

5. Dishes are always put away, cabinet or dishwasher.

No dishes in the sink or stuck in the dishwasher.

"Dishes are finished in the dishwasher? It’s emptied and dirty ones are placed inside while waiting for the dishwasher to get full," she notes.

@brunchwithbabs

Life Changing Dishwasher Hack #tutorials #kitchenhacks #parentsoftiktok #dishwasherhack

6. Don't neglect your shoes.

When she takes them off, they get put away.

"Shoes are put away immediately upon walking in the house," she shares.

7. Knock out small tasks.

There is no time to waste.

"If it takes less than 5 minutes clean it while you’re waiting for something else to get done," she writes.

8. Take no days off.

Rather than assign certain days for cleaning, she is constantly doing it throughout the week.

"Lastly, I do not have scheduled cleaning days. I just do something all the time," she explains. "My life is kind of unpredictable, we love traveling or going out for the day so my so called cleaning schedule would be shot to hell every time. It’s better this way, because now I never feel behind."

great depression, the great depression, great depression recipes, great depression food, great depression recipe
Lewis Wickes Hine/Library of Congress, Dorothea Lange/Wikipedia

Recipes from the Great Depression to make today.

The Great Depression, which lasted from 1929-1939, caused economic turmoil worldwide. Families struggled to feed themselves, and went to extreme lengths to stretch food and utilize all available ingredients.

Known as the Greatest Generation (those born between 1901 and 1927), their resourcefulness resulted in a number of creative (and delicious) recipes that remain relevant today. Home chefs and bakers shared their Great Depression recipes on Reddit that have been passed down and are still enjoyed today to help others get inventive and save money.


From soups and stews to cakes, these are 17 Great Depression recipes to try.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Soups, Stews and More

Beef and Noodles

"My grandmas go to: Bag of egg noodles 1 can of creamed corn 1 can Campbells chicken noodle soup 1 lb ground beef. Salt and pepper to taste. Brown ground beef, add all other ingredients, add enough water or light chicken stock to cover noodles if needed. Bring to boil, and reduce to a simmer for about 15 minutes, take off the heat and let it rest 10 minutes before serving with buttered white bread. I still make this to this day. My kids loved it too. Basically homemade Hamburger Helper." - -__Doc__-

Hoover Stew

Ingredients

1 box noodles
A can of tomatoes
1 package of hot dogs, or 1 can of sausage or meat
A can of corn, peas or beans
2-4 cups water

Instructions

"Mix all ingredients together in a pot until boiling. Then simmer for 15-20 minutes until the noodles are tender. If you have aromatics, onion and garlic would be a great addition. If not, the recipe is great as is." - Josuaross54

Zaprezna soup

"Depression soup... make a roux, add salt pepper and caraway seeds. Add water to make a thick soup texture. Use an egg or two mixed with flour and salt pepper and mix together to make dumplings.. drop into the soup to cook.. This was called zaprezna soup or depression soup. We ate it often in the 60's after my dad abandoned us. Money was short but this soup was good." - User Unknown

Chipped Beef On Toast

Ingredients

8 oz. dried beef jerky
2 tbsp butter or oil
4 tbsp flour
4 cups milk
Salt and pepper to taste
Sliced homemade bread, for serving

Instructions

"Add jerky and oil to a pan over medium heat. Cook until the meat softens, about 3-4 minutes. Stir in your flour and cook for 1-2 minutes. Add milk and bring to a low boil. Allow sauce to thicken for up to 5 minutes. Season with salt and pepper if you have it. Serve over homemade bread, toasted if desired." - Josuaross54

Rivel Soup

"In Ohio…My mom would cook Rivel Soup when I was a kid in 80s and 90s. She still makes it. It’s milk based with flour dough balls in it. I hate it. Sometimes they would fry potatoes and put them in the soup." - Vegetable_Record_855

Potato Soup

Ingredients

4 large potatoes, peeled and sliced (or 2 cans of potatoes)
2 garlic cloves, chopped
One carrot, sliced
A can of meat, sausage, or hot dogs (optional)
3 cups water or stock
3 cups milk
Any herbs you have on-hand
Salt to taste

Instructions

"Slice all your potatoes, garlic, and carrots. Add to a soup pot with the meat, water, and milk. Bring to a boil and reduce the heat, keeping the mix at a low simmer. Then, cook for 30 minutes until all veggies are tender. Add herbs and salt, if using. Serve hot." - Josuaross54

Tuna Fish Stew

"My mother's family always made tuna fish stew. It is celery, potatoes, canned tuna fish, milk, and hard boiled eggs. Sautee the celery until half way cooked, throw in some chopped potatoes and water. Cook until the potatoes are done. Thin the stew with some milk. Throw in chopped hard boil eggs. Salt and pepper to taste Serve over stale bread. It was cheap, quick, and really filling." - RoseNoire4

@foodwanderer

Great Depression Cooking Recipe #greatdepression #recipe #cooking #frugalmeals #cookingonabudget #nostalgia #friedpotatoes #hotdogs #foodwanderer #tastetest #SplashSummerVibe

Sides

Baked Beans

Ingredients

1 package soaked dried beans, or 2 cans of beans
One tomato, chopped
1 onion, chopped
2 cloves garlic, chopped
2 tbsp lard
Two tbsp molasses
One cup water

Instructions
"Soak your beans, if using dried, overnight and drain the liquid. Prepare your veggies by chopping. Omit any vegetable that you do not have on-hand. Add lard to a stock pot and cook your vegetables until tender. Add the beans, molasses, and water. Cook all together with a lid on for 2-3 hours or until the beans have your desired consistency. Add more water if needed.

Milk Potatoes

"Milk potatoes. Fry sliced potatoes with salt, pepper and a bit of onion until almost done. Pour milk over potatoes and simmer until potatoes are cooked through." - kms811•6y ago

Ash Cakes

"Ash cakes got their name because different renditions are cooked in the hot white ash of your campfire. These are only 3 ingredients but are filling and have a great texture.

Ingredients

½ cup cornmeal
1 cup meat stock or water
2 tbsp lard or grease

Instructions
Mix both ingredients together in a bowl and allow to sit overnight to hydrate the cornmeal. Pat into a bread pan and refrigerate or add to your cool storage before allowing to set up. The next day, slice into 1-inch slices and fry in melted lard. Serve hot and crispy." - Josuaross54

Sweets

Potato Donuts

"Potato donuts 🍩 from depression era cooking with Dylan Hollis." - BainbridgeBorn

Wacky Cake

"If you have interest in baking, make a wacky cake. It’s a chocolate cake that has no milk, butter, or eggs, because those items were scarce during the Depression, but it is so good! The recipe I linked has more steps, but I’ve known a lot of people to literally just dump and mix everything in the baking dish." - gwhite81218

@bdylanhollis

The cake without butter, eggs or milk #baking #vintage #cooking #cake

Rice Pudding

Ingredients

1 cup rice
2 cups milk
2 tbsp butter
3 tbsp honey, maple syrup, or molasses
Pinch of cinnamon

"Combine all ingredients in a small saucepan and cook over low heat, about 20 minutes, stirring frequently. Taste for doneness and cook an additional 5 minutes, tasting until desired consistency. Serve warm." - Josuaross54

Tomato Soup Cake

"Tomato soup cake." - AxelCanin

Water Pie

"Water pie 😋😍." - AxelCanin

Mock Apple Pie

"There was a thing for 'apple' pie made with Ritz crackers my grandmother made some time ago (she was born 1901 so def Depression life).https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/9545/mock-apple-pie/ That recipe looks more complicated than the one grandma made, but there are a number of recipes online for it, including one made by Ritz, on the box." - User Unknown

Hard Time Pudding

"Batter: 1 cup flour
1/2 cup white sugar
1/2 cup raisins (Optional, I hate them)
3 tsp Baking powder
1/2 cup water
Syrup: 1 1/2 cup Brown sugar
1 TBSP. butter/marg.
1 tsp vanilla
1 1/2 - 2 cup water

Mix together flour, sugar, raisins, Baking powder, and water. Pour into a baking dish. In a sauce pan combine brown sugar, butter, water bring to boil then add vanilla and pour over the batter. Bake at 300 º for 1/2 hour." - MsBean18

bee gees, how deep is your love, bee gees live

The Bee Gees singing "How Deep is Your Love" in 1998.

Not all live performances are created equal, but when the circumstances and the talent are just right, they can far surpass studio recordings. In 1998, the Bee Gees, brothers Barry, Robin and Maurice Gibb, stopped by ITV’s “Des O'Connor Tonight” with acoustic guitars in hand to promote their recent release, “One Night Only,” an album and live concert DVD featuring many of the band’s biggest hits.

The highlight of the performance was when Barry got ready to strum his guitar for a performance of “How Deep Is Your Love,” the 1977 megahit from the “Saturday Night Fever Soundtrack,” but instead chose to sing the song a cappella.


Barry starts the song solo in his beautiful falsetto, but then, when his brothers join him, they create a wonderful harmony that only brothers can make. The show’s host, Des O’Connor, a notable singer himself, even joins in for a few bars.

- YouTube youtu.be

Earlier in the performance, the brothers played their version of “Islands in the Stream,” a song made famous by Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers in 1983 that was written by the Bee Gees. In 1998, the song was enjoying a resurgence as its melody was used in the song “Ghetto Supastar” by Pras of The Fugees.

Robin Gibb later admitted that the song was initially written for Marvin Gaye to sing, but he was tragically murdered in 1984 by his father. The band also had Diana Ross in mind while composing the tune.

During the appearance, the band also sang “Guilty,” a song that the Bee Gees wrote for Barbara Streisand and Barry produced in 1980.

You can watch the entire performance here:

- YouTube youtu.be

The Gibb brothers started making music together when they were children, and after their first public appearance together at a local movie theater in 1956, they were hooked on performing.

“It was the feeling of standing in front of an audience that was so amazing," said Barry. "We’d never seen anything like it. We were very young, but it made an enormous impression. We didn’t want to do anything else but make music.”

After the family moved to Australia in 1958, Barry, Maurice, and Robin were "discovered" at the Redcliffe Speedway, where they had asked to perform between races. Even over the tinny PA system, their harmonies made an impression. Speedway manager Bill Goode introduced the trio to DJ Bill Gates, who set them up with a recording session.

the bee gees, gibb brothers, maurice, barry, robin gibb Stayin Alive GIF by Bee Gees Giphy

If you've ever wondered how the Bee Gees got their name, that was it: Bill Goode, Bill Gates, Barry Gibb, and the brothers' mother Barbara Gibb all had the initials B.G. After a strong reception on the airwaves in Brisbane, Gates forwarded the brothers' recordings to a Sydney radio station. They got a lot of airtime there as well, and the band had a run of success performing in Australia, but it wasn't until their return to England in 1967 that they became the international sensation we all know today.

Manager Robert Stigwood had received tapes from the Gibbs brothers and called them up within weeks of their arrival in the U.K.

“I loved their composing,” Stigwood told Rolling Stone in 1977. “I also loved their harmony singing. It was unique, the sound they made; I suppose it was a sound only brothers could make.”

- YouTube www.youtube.com

And, as they say, the rest is history. The award-winning 2020 HBO documentary, "The Bee Gees: How Can You Mend a Broken Heart" tells the story of the band with loads of footage from throughout their 40-year career, which includes not only their disco-era fame, but the various phases of their musical journey and the countless songs they wrote for other artists.

As one commenter wrote, "People that call the Bee Gees a 'disco group' don't have a clue. They had 10 albums out before they ventured into 'disco.' Their song catalogue is amazing and some of their very best songs were written long before Saturday Night Fever. Those 'disco' songs are classics as well. It is nice to see they are finally getting the recognition they deserve."

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

Learning

Communications expert shares 3 simple tricks to stop oversharing during conversations

Say goodbye to staring at your ceiling at 3 a.m. thinking about something embarrassing you said weeks ago.

oversharing; oversharing tips; stop oversharing; quitting oversharing; awkward conversations; embarrassing conversations

Communication expert says these tricks can help you stop oversharing

People do all sorts of things when they're nervous during a conversation. Some people fidget, others avoid eye contact, and others get red and blotchy on their chest and neck. Then, there are also those who share way too much information at inappropriate times due to stress, nervousness, or simply being neurodivergent. Oversharing often results in feelings of embarrassment, which can result in more nervousness in the moment.

A lot of oversharing is involuntary, leaving people wondering how they can save their sanity by not doing it to begin with. Jefferson Fisher, a communications expert, has the solution for people struggling with chronic oversharing. We've all been there, even if it's not something that happens frequently. There's a moment of awkward silence, and you attempt to fill it, only to tell a story better suited for a group of friends, not a work function.


After oversharing occurs, it's often quickly followed by its best friend—overthinking. Overthinking brings along anxiety, which can drag insomnia into the mix, becoming a party of unwanted guests. But Fisher claims a few of his tricks will stop unwanted words from falling out of your mouth in no time.

oversharing; oversharing tips; stop oversharing; quitting oversharing; awkward conversations; embarrassing conversations Friends sharing a moment in the sunlit park.Photo credit: Canva

In the brief video uploaded to YouTube, Fisher lists how to combat the inclination to overshare:

1. Balance the conversation

Estimate the amount of time it took for the person you're speaking with to share information with you, then try to match the time when you share. Fisher says, "If you are taking double the amount of time that somebody used, meaning your two to their one, well then the conversation is unbalanced, and you're probably talking too much."

oversharing; oversharing tips; stop oversharing; quitting oversharing; awkward conversations; embarrassing conversations Feeling the stress: A young woman holds her head in frustration.Photo credit: Canva

2. Set a mental word limit

Fisher says to avoid talking too much and subsequently oversharing, practice only using three to four sentences to say what needs to be said. This will help you avoid dominating the conversation or accidentally sharing too much information in the wrong setting. "If the other person wants to know more, well, they can ask," Fisher explains.

3. Watch for cues

"If you're saying too much, the other person is going to start looking disinterested," Fisher says. "They're going to look bored, they're going to have lack of contact, and that's a great place for you to just ask a question, any question. Because it forces you to stop talking."

oversharing; oversharing tips; stop oversharing; quitting oversharing; awkward conversations; embarrassing conversations Friends sharing a laugh over coffee at a cozy café.Photo credit: Canva

When it comes to handling the embarrassment or guilt that can come from oversharing, Happiful shares how to help alleviate the vulnerability hangover, writing, "In situations where you begin noticing that pit in your stomach of regret or embarrassment about oversharing, talk about it with the person you just opened up to. It could be as simple as acknowledging it, which can diffuse any tension you feel and resolve any awkwardness."

Using grounding techniques like breathing exercises, the 5-4-3-2-1 technique, or doing something physical can all help alleviate the feelings that come from oversharing. Writing about your feelings in a journal or even chatting with a friend who understands your oversharing struggle can go a long way when it comes to reducing anxiety from sharing too much information.

No matter the reason for oversharing, using the simple techniques above just might do the trick to reduce the habit.

french, paris, france, love, romance, Eiffel Tower
Photo Credit: https://www.canva.com/photos

A couple embrace. The Eiffel Tower

Leave it to the French to have the most beautiful, sexy, and sometimes non-translatable terms and phrases of endearment.

Their association with romance makes it extra ironic that the French don't often say "I love you" (or "Je t'aime"). At least according to BBC Features Correspondent Sylvia Sabes in her 2021 article, "Why the French rarely say 'I love you."


Sabes suggests that words this important shouldn't just be thrown around: "The French don't say 'I love you' because they don't have a verb to express heartfelt sentiments for the people they care about. There is only the verb 'aimer,' which means both 'to like' and 'to love.' As a result, a French person is not exaggerating when they conjugate 'aimer' to explain their relationship to rugby, a warm baguette, or the smell of lilacs."

lilacs, flowers, love, amour, beauty Close up of lilac flowers. Photo by Olha Suntsova on Unsplash

For this reason, they don't dilute the words "I love you" as often as one might think. "Naturally, then, it feels trite and rather mundane to use the same word when describing intense feelings of love for one's newborn baby, a childhood friend, or a life partner."

She further notes that the French "show" their love. (In fact, even the very words "flattery," "chivalry," and "romantic" all stem from Old French words— flatterie, chevalerie, and romantique, respectively.)

And this includes finding specific wording to show their romantic love. From literary geniuses like Victor Hugo to everyday romantics, here are some French quotes sure to grab (the right person's) attention:

"Je t’envoie l’éternité dans une minute"

Translation: I’m sending you eternity in a minute.

For the complete context of the sentence, Victor Hugo wrote in an unpublished manuscript Lettre à Léonie Biard:
"Je n'ai qu'un instant. Je t'envoie l'éternité dans une minute, l'infini dans un mot, tout mon cœur dans : je t'aime."

Translation: "I only have a moment. I’m sending you eternity in a minute, infinity in a word, all my heart in: I love you."

This was written to Léonie Thévenot d'Aunet, a woman with whom Hugo had a scandalous affair. Once they were caught, she was arrested and sent to prison.

"Un seul être vous manque, et tout est dépeuplé"

Translation: "Only one person is missing, and the world is depopulated (empty.)"

On the subreddit r/French, someone asks for French "love quotes/sentences" for a letter they're writing for an anniversary. Regarding their boyfriend, they write in part, "Our 9th anniversary is coming next month and I want to write him a letter, but I want to include some cute and/or romantic quotes or sentences in French, no matter how silly or cheesy, so he can try to translate them and I watch him go happy puppy mode again hehe."

Many came through. One suggests this line from poet Alphonse de Lamartine—meaning, "without just one person, the world feels empty."


"Tu m'as manqué dans mes rêves"

Translation: I missed you in my dreams.

I learned this one in high school French class, and what I loved is our teacher taught us we could say it to anyone — romantic partners, puppies, and friends. (Probably best not to say it to our French teachers, however.)


"Je vous aime éperdument et je vous le dis et je vous le répète, mes mots l'expriment, mes baisers le prouvent, et quand j'ai fini… je recommence."

Translation: "I love you madly and I tell you so and I repeat it, my words express it, my kisses prove it, and when I'm done… I start over."

While this is a rather long one to memorize, it would be an excellent quote for a love letter. Victor Hugo's phrasing was so uniquely and devastatingly romantic, I had to quote him twice. Again, he wrote this in Lettre à Léonie Biard to his lover Léonie Thévenot d'Aunet.

"Tu me manques."

Translation: You miss me. (Or more precisely, you are missing from me.)

Again, I remember this expression from school. And the French-to-English translation can be a bit confusing and controversial.

There's an entire Reddit thread dedicated to this one sentence. The OP states, "So this phrase has always blown my mind. I understand that this expression means 'I miss you,' but that it literally translates to what is essentially 'You lack me.' Correct? If so, my first question is, why is this expression set up this way?"

Others explain the exact translation is more "You are missing from me" than "You miss me." One Redditor sums it up nicely: "The 'me' is an indirect object. Manquer is better understood here as 'to be missing' or 'lacking.' So it is more like 'you are missing/lacking/absent to me.' Your confusion is from approaching a French phrase using an English mindset."

In whatever mindset one might find themselves, these French phrases and quotes are sure to elevate the romance. At least, worth a shot!