Louis went through some really hard things and came out “Unbroken.” But we all go through things and come out better for it. Check out the call to action at the end of this video, and maybe your story can help others the way Louis’ has.
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A safe, stable home can change lives for the better. Here’s how Habitat for Humanity wants to make that possible for everyone.
Better health, better jobs, and a brighter future all start with access to a safe, affordable home.
A single door can open up a world of endless possibilities. For homeowners, the front door of their house is a gateway to financial stability, job security, and better health. Yet for many, that door remains closed. Due to the rising costs of housing, 1 in 3 people around the world wake up without the security of safe, affordable housing.
Since 1976, Habitat for Humanity has made it their mission to unlock and open the door to opportunity for families everywhere, and their efforts have paid off in a big way. Through their work over the past 50 years, more than 65 million people have gained access to new or improved housing, and the movement continues to gain momentum. Since 2011 alone, Habitat for Humanity has expanded access to affordable housing by a hundredfold.
A world where everyone has access to a decent home is becoming a reality, but there’s still much to do. As they celebrate 50 years of building, Habitat for Humanity is inviting people of all backgrounds and talents to be part of what comes next through Let’s Open the Door, a global campaign that builds on this momentum and encourages people everywhere to help expand access to safe, affordable housing for those who need it most. Here’s how the foundation to a better world starts with housing, and how everyone can pitch in to make it happen.
Volunteers raise a wall for the framework of a new home during the first day of building at Habitat for Humanity’s 2025 Carter Work Project. Globally, almost 3 billion people, including 1 in 6 U.S. families, struggle with high costs and other challenges related to housing. A crisis in itself, this also creates larger problems that affect families and communities in unexpected ways. People who lack affordable, stable housing are also more likely to experience financial hardship in other areas of their lives, since a larger share of their income often goes toward rent, utilities, and frequent moves. They are also more likely to experience health problems due to chronic stress or environmental factors, such as mold. Housing insecurity also goes hand-in-hand with unstable employment, since people may need to move further from their jobs or switch jobs altogether to offset the cost of housing.
Affordable homeownership creates a stable foundation for families to thrive, reducing stress and increasing the likelihood for good health and stable employment. Habitat for Humanity builds and repairs homes with individual families, but it also strengthens entire communities as well. The MicroBuild® Initiative, for example, strengthens communities by increasing access to loans for low-income families seeking to build or repair their homes. Habitat ReStore locations provide affordable appliances and building materials to local communities, in addition to creating job and volunteer opportunities that support neighborhood growth.
Marsha and her son pose for a photo while building their future home with Southern Crescent Habitat for Humanity in Georgia. Everyone can play a part in the fight for housing equity and the pursuit of a better world. Over the past 50 years, Habitat for Humanity has become a leader in global housing thanks to an engaged network of volunteers—but you don’t need to be skilled with a hammer to make a meaningful impact. Building an equitable future means calling on a wide range of people and talents.
Here’s how you can get involved in the global housing movement:- Speaking up on social media about the growing housing crisis
- Volunteering on a Habitat for Humanity build in your local community
- Travel and build with Habitat in the U.S. or in one of 60+ countries where we work around the globe
- Join the Let’s Open the Door movement and, when you donate, you can create your own personalized door
- Shop or donate at your local Habitat ReStore
Every action, big and small, drives a global movement toward a better future. A safe home unlocks opportunity for families and communities alike, but it’s volunteers and other supporters, working together with a shared vision, who can open the door for everyone.
Visit habitat.org/open-door to learn more and get involved today.
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Master linguist visits town with world’s most ‘perplexing’ accent and finally meets his match
Most shockingly, it’s an extremely unique form of English.
Some languages are harder to learn than others. Many who’ve tried will say that Eastern languages like Chinese Mandarin and Japanese are extremely difficult for non-natives because of the unique sounds and intricate writing system. Others, like Hungarian or Finnish, have complex grammar rules that are challenging for beginners.
Some people find pretty much all of them simple. Or at least, they enjoy the challenge.
Arieh Smith, a YouTuber known as Xiaoma, is a polyglot—someone who has mastered many languages. He’s known as a linguistics master and his skill and teachings have earned him nearly a whopping seven million subscribers on social media.
Xiaoma recently traveled to a well-known part of the world and finally met his match in the form of a dialect he just couldn’t crack: English.
No, not regular American or British English, but a specific accent and dialect called Glaswegian; spoken in Glasgow, Scotland.
Glasgow is a beautiful and fascinating city. Photo by Dorin Seremet on Unsplash Xiaoma says Glaswegian is known as one of the trickiest English accents in the entire world, and so he was eager to go and see—or hear—it for himself. He quickly meets up with a local guide who has agreed to show him around the city, and immediately, Xiaoma can hardly understand the man at all. When the guide tells Xiaoma that the day is going to have “tops off weather,” the YouTuber is baffled. (It’s just a clever, and cheeky way, of describing good weather.)
“You guys speak English, but it’s different, it’s like…”
“Swahili,” the guide finished for him. Xiaoma agrees.
Later, Xiaoma interacts with a few randoms on the street, who all greet and welcome him warmly, even though they can’t understand each other all that well. Eventually, Xiaoma tries his hand at a few of the Glaswegian phrases he’s picked up, but he just can’t seem to match the pace and cadence of the natives—even though they’re technically speaking the same language!
You’ve got to watch the whole series of interactions to truly appreciate this fascinating dialect:
Reactions poured in as nearly a million people have viewed the video to date. Many were fascinated by the language, but even more viewers appreciated the cultural representation on display in the video.
The video resonated especially with UK residents and people who had Scottish ties:
“This might be the most authentic representation of glasgow ive seen on an international channel – no sanitised tourist pish, just normal folk on the street.”
“Was born and raised in Glasgow for the first 9 years of my life, been back there a few times over the year but not returned in maybe 20 odd years now, this made me extremely homesick as to how friendly and willing to chat to strangers everyone is, you don’t get that South of England.”
“The language is rich but their cheekiness is richer”
“Glaswegians you’ll notice are very informal but very friendly. Most of the slang is crude humour jabbing at the nature of things and I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“Man, being a native Scot I always have a big smile on my face hearing Scottish folk talk, especially Glaswegians. Pure magic, like!”
Glaswegian is an incredibly stubborn, resilient accent that shows no signs of going away anytime soon.
Fancy a visit? Photo by Artur Kraft on Unsplash Many different towns and regions across the UK have their own specific dialects, but a lot of them are becoming “diluted” due to global television, social media, etc. It’s related to a concept called “global homogenization.” The more we’re able to travel both physically and digitally, and the more we all consume the same media and culture on a large scale, the more we lose some of the regional intricacies that make the world so fascinating. Languages blend together, cultures flatten on, accents disappear. For example, the Brogue—an extremely rare English dialect found in some Atlantic coast islands in the United States—is quickly fading away.
Not Glaswegian.
“Interestingly, what is not happening in Scotland is the dilution of accents to a more homogenised anglicised accent on the scale that we are seeing in England, and in fact the Scots accent remains very distinctive,” Professor Jane Stuart-Smith of Glasgow University told The Independent in 2015.
While the accent is beautiful, in its own strange way, maybe its the local culture and the good-hearted nature of the people who speak it that keeps it alive. You might not be any closer to understanding or speaking Glaswegian after watching Xiaoma’s video, but with any luck, your interest in visiting Scotland will be piqued.
This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.
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Three lions have the most beautiful reaction to a man singing a Guns N’ Roses song to them
“What a beautiful interaction to witness.”
There are several stories written about music taming the savage beast, but this is no fairy tale. A video shows a small pride of lions in an enclosure hear the acoustic guitar and soothing singing of a French singer-songwriter covering Guns N’ Roses’ “November Rain.” One would think that the animals would be annoyed or ignore the music period. Instead, something heartwarming happened.
One by one, the lions approached the musician known as Plumes as he performed. They calmly laid down and started yawn-singing to the tunes while nuzzling one another, with two lions cuddling less than a yard from where Plumes sat and played. The lions were relaxing and enjoying the concert along with their afternoon nap, showing off the gentler side of the predatory wild cats.
People remarked upon the lion’s reaction to Plumes’ tunes:
“Wow! That is truly an incredible interaction with them. They really enjoyed your singing to them.”
“Omg, the way they cuddle.”
“What a beautiful interaction to witness.”
“Music is the universal language!”
“That was so magical! Music speaks to the soul. Human, animal, all relate to the feelings music evokes.”
This isn’t the only time Plumes has performed for an animal audience. In fact, his social media and YouTube channel show videos of multiple concerts for humans and creatures alike. He not only has played his guitar and sang for lions, but for tigers and bears (oh my!) among many other animals at wildlife refuges, enclosures, and zoos.
While Plumes performs his music for a wide variety of animals today, he started at home, playing for a herd of cows in the French countryside while living with his grandmother.
“I read somewhere that cows like music, that it’s soothing to them,” Plumes shared with AMFM Magazine. “They were super receptive. They gathered around, some even rubbed against me. It was magical.”
Since then, Plumes had been taking the opportunity to warm up his vocal chords and provide various animals a free mini-concert throughout his tours and travels, recording video of their reactions to his music.
“Animals inspire me to be kinder, more patient,” he added. “They remind us to reconnect with nature. Maybe we’ve lost touch with nature, and these videos help people feel that connection again.”
Understandably, most people believe music and music appreciation are uniquely human traits, but there are studies that music isn’t exclusively for homosapiens’ enjoyment. Some studies show different species reacting positively to music in different ways. Chimpanzees sway to music, dogs tend to show calmer behaviors when listening to classical music, and sea lions synchronize their head movements to a song’s beat, just to name a few. There are veterinarians that suggest creating a music playlist for your dog to play when leaving the house so it helps reduce their separation anxiety.
It’s interesting to see how music impacts different animals in different ways, especially if music helps them. Over time, who knows how much music will bring man and animal closer together. If a lion can enjoy Guns N’ Roses, the possibilities are nearly endless.
This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.
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‘Why women leave’: Woman who ‘does everything’ shares why she left her husband who did nothing
This is a common story in many households.
There are a few prominent reasons why 70% of divorces in the United States among heterosexual couples are filed by women. Women have more economic opportunities than in decades past and are better positioned to care for themselves and their children without a husband’s income.
Another big reason is that even though the world has become much more egalitarian than in the past, women still bear the brunt of most of the emotional labor in the home. In 2022, Gilza Fort-Martinez, a Florida-based licensed couples’ therapist, told the BBC that men are socialized to have lower emotional intelligence than women, leaving their wives to do most of the emotional labor.
Secondly, studies show that women still do most of the domestic work in the home, and, among couples with children, women are often the default parent. In short, many women are pulling double or triple duty for their households.
One woman’s day says it all
In 2023, a TikToker with two children (now @littleoldme_myversion, but formerly @thesoontobeexwife) shared why she decided to leave her husband of two decades and her story recounts a common theme: She did all the work and her husband did little but complain.
The video, entitled “Why women leave,” has received over 2 million views.
“So for the men out there who watch this, which frankly I kind of hope there aren’t any, you have an idea maybe what not to do,” she starts the video. “Yesterday, I go to work all day, go pick up one kid from school, go grocery shopping, go pick up the other kid from school, come home. Kids need a snack, make the snack. Kids want to play outside, we play outside.”
Her husband then comes home after attending a volunteer program, which she didn’t want him to join, and the self-centeredness begins. “So he gets home, he eats the entire carton of blueberries I just purchased for the children’s lunch and asks me what’s for dinner. I tell him I don’t know because the kids had a late snack and they’re not hungry yet,” she says in the video.
She then explains how the last time he cooked, which was a rare event, he nearly punched a hole in the wall because he forgot an ingredient. Their previous home had multiple holes in the walls. Dr. Gail Saltz, a psychiatrist and host of the Power of Different podcast, says that when men punch walls, it’s a sign that they haven’t “learned to deal with anger in a reasonable way.”
“Anyway, finally one kid is hungry,” the TikToker continues. “So, I offered to make pancakes because they’re quick and easy and it’s late. He sees the pancake batter and sees that there’s wheat flour in it and starts complaining. Says he won’t eat them. Now, I am a grown adult making pancakes for my children who I am trying to feed nutritionally balanced meals. So yes, there’s wheat flour in the pancake mix.”
Then her husband says he’s not doing the dishes because he didn’t eat any pancakes. “Friends, the only thing this man does around this house is dishes occasionally. If I cook, he usually does the dishes. I cook most nights. But here’s the thing: That’s all he does. I do everything else. Everything. Everything.”
She then listed all of the household duties she handles.
“I cook, I clean the bathrooms, I make the lunches, I make the breakfasts, I mow the lawn, I do kids’ bedtime. I literally do everything and he does dishes once a day, maybe,” she says.
The comments poured in from everywhere
The video received over 8,700 comments and most of them were words of support for the TikToker who would go on to file for divorce from her husband.
“The amount of women I’ve heard say that their male partners are only teaching how to be completely independent of them, theirs going to be so many lonely men out there,” one commenter wrote. “I was married to someone just like this for over 35 years. You will be so happy when you get away from him,” another said.
“The way you will no longer be walking on eggshells in your own home is an amazing feeling. You got this!” one more added.
Two years later, here is where she is now
Two years on, our TikToker is doing well. Her page is dedicated to “single motherhood,” “life in [my] 40s,” and, of course, “loads of Taylor Swift [and] some books.” In a recent TikTok video, she shares footage of a show where people of all ages and stages are dancing to a cover of Taylor Swift’s “I Can Do it With a Broken Heart” with text overlay that reads, “The only kind of men I will accept in life, those that enthusiastically sing Taylor Swift and Chappell Roan.” Honestly, that’s the standard and more power to her.
This article originally appeared three years ago. It has been updated.
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Grandma goes viral with 3 perfect, hilarious rules for her funeral
We finally know why Bertha’s not invited.
Forget kids. Grandmas say the darndest things. One grandma in particular took TikTok by storm for her brutally honest, yet hilarious “funeral rules.” And though Grandma Lill adds the caveat that it won’t be anytime soon, you had better remember these rules when the day finally comes. Or there might be two funerals to plan.
96-year-old Grandma Lill is no stranger to the spotlight. Her social media bios all read “I’m a celebrity” and she’s not foolin’ around. She has her own clothing line, YouTube Channel and her name has been uttered by the likes of Jimmy Kimmel and Steve Harvey. She’s basically the internet’s favorite granny.
But this video takes the cake at a whopping 50 million views. She’s gone full-blown viral now. Probably because she inadvertently brings up some little gems of wisdom we could all apply to dealing with the passing of a loved one.
Or maybe it’s just cause she’s delightfully cantankerous. Either way, it makes for some wholesome entertainment.
Without further ado, the three rules
1. Cry, but not too much
Or, as Grandma Lill puts it, “don’t make a fool of yourself.”
Funerals can be just as much about commemorating as they are expressing grief. We can also share the happy memories we have of those who have passed, not just shed tears.
I think this is what grandma Lill was getting at. Or maybe she just doesn’t like you stealing the attention.
2. Bertha ISN’T invited
Whoever this Bertha chick is … she messed up. She messed up big time. Bertha, you have been CANCELED.
And hey, why shouldn’t we decide who’s on the invite list for our last big day? If, for example, there’s a family member who caused a lot of pain, or with whom we just didn’t share a kinship … perhaps there doesn’t have to be an obligation to invite them to these major life moments.
Basically, this is your permission slip to openly decline any and all Berthas in your life. That goes for weddings, birthday parties, baby showers … you name it. Don’t let her in!
3. Get drunk afterward
As long as you take a shot for Grandma Lill.
After the ceremony honors what’s lost, take a moment to let go and move forward with the life that is still around you. Something tells me that letting it all go and celebrating life is something Grandma Lill’s a pro at.
Thousands of commenters chimed in to celebrate Lill’s rules. But the overwhelming sentiment from almost every single one of them was: We need the full story of the beef with Bertha!
We finally found out who Bertha is
Lucky for us, all was revealed two years later when Grandma Lills made a video about attending Bertha’s funeral. Bertha had, allegedly, tried to hook up with Lill’s late husband. Not cool, Bertha! “I always knew I would outlive her,” grandma joked.
In another recent viral video, Lill spoofs popular “Get Ready With Me” videos from other influencers by bringing the viewer along as she gets dressed for a funeral. Of course, funerals aren’t the only topic Grandma Lill can make you laugh about.
Her TikTok channel is a carefully curated gallery of pure funny. Everything from bingo jokes to advice for getting back at your ex (yeah, she shows no mercy) can be found here.
What Grandma Lill gets right about funerals
No one likes funerals, least of all the person who’s there to be mourned. It’s why the idea of the Irish Wake is so popular: a spirited celebration of life that encourages laughter and merriment. Grandma Lills definitely has the right idea about how she wants to go out, and now that it’s cemented in Internet lore, her kids and grandkids will be forced to honor her wishes when the day comes.
This article originally appeared four years ago. It has been updated.
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The reason ‘good’ people experience less joy but feel more fulfilled in life
Being conscientious has some truly unexpected pros and cons.
If you’re not one, you probably know one: conscientious people are never late, they’re organized, and their word is their bond. They do things the “right” way. They like things in order. And they have a strong, nearly unbreakable sense of right and wrong.
They’re often good people. Very good. It’s hard to imagine there could be a downside to this personality type. But new research indicates there’s a little more to it than meets the eye.
New research reveals the costs of being too “good”
A recent study out of the University of Galway aimed to find out how personality traits affect the way we experience emotions.
Researchers began by measuring participants using a Five-Factor Model, which breaks personality into five key dimensions: Openness to Experience, Extraversion, Agreeableness, Neuroticism, and Conscientiousness.
Then they exposed the volunteers to several video clips which were each designed to elicit a specific emotion: anger, disgust, fear, joy, sadness, and surprise.
Interestingly, the clip the team chose to elicit joy was none other than the famous diner scene from When Harry Met Sally: a comedy classic.
People who scored high in conscientiousness were among the only group to react negatively to finding the scene funny or enjoyable. It did not trigger nearly as much joy in this group as it did for the others.
The research team theorized that, with such a powerful correlation, it was relatively safe to say that extremely orderly, structured, and conscientious people may have a lower capacity for experiencing spontaneous joy.
But there’s still a powerful upside to being conscientious
Here’s the tradeoff: while highly conscientious people laughed less and felt less joyful during the comedy scene, they also reacted less powerfully to the scene that primarily stimulated sadness.
What scene was that? The Lion King, of course. You know the one.
The findings suggest that, perhaps, living a structured and highly-orderly life can protect against negative emotions—even at the cost of some of the good ones.
Think about it. Imagine a person who never misses a deadline, forgets to pay a bill, or runs a red light. They’re never in trouble. People don’t get angry at them. They don’t wind up on probation at work or, worse, in jail.
“How people structure their environment may be a key shield from experiencing sadness, which may represent a significant motivator for people high in orderliness if they are sensitive to this emotion,” the researchers wrote.
If that doesn’t sound like a worthwhile tradeoff, another recent study builds on these findings and explores even more of the upside to living a conscientious life.
“Good” people excel at finding meaning and satisfaction in their work
Psychology Today reveals details of another recent study where, again, the Big Five personality dimensions were used to sort people into buckets.
Researchers out of KU Leuven found that highly conscientious people were among those most likely experience a “flow state.”
Flow is a mental state where you become completely immersed in your work, to the point that you don’t even notice the passage of time. It’s sometimes known as being “in the zone,” a state of effortless momentum, and generally people find it to be an enjoyable and deeply meaningful feeling.
“The characteristics of Conscientious individuals are essential for maintaining focus, managing challenges, and regulating efforts toward meaningful tasks,” the study’s authors write.
Psychology Today sums up the cutting-edge research: “Being dutiful, organized, and especially orderly may have its limitations, at least in terms of joy. However, there is the advantage of being less likely to get into the type of trouble that would trigger negative emotions. Then there is the upside of being able to bury yourself in your daily tasks to the point of not becoming bored or finding them useless.”
One bummer for conscientious people: being structured and organized to the point that you’re less joyful and less likely to laugh at something funny might make you less likable overall. But, you probably won’t care: further research suggests conscientious people live longer and stay sharper and healthier into old age better than their peers.
If it all seems like a moot point—after all, you’re either conscientious or you’re not—think again. Personality can, and often does change, over the course of a person’s life. It is possible to dial down your structured, risk-averse ways of thinking and open yourself up to more spontaneous joy. And it’s also possible to become more orderly and reliable, minimizing negative emotions and getting more done.
It’s a worthwhile exercise for anyone to see the upsides of their personality, who they truly are, and to know that who they are never has to be set in stone.
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Anxiety experts explain the fascinating reason 6:30 p.m. is a perfect time to enter the ‘no worry zone’
“It sets a clear boundary at a time when the mind is more likely to drift into worry.”
Anxiety can be a funny thing. It loops through our frontal lobes, and if left unchecked, it doesn’t always willingly see itself out. Psychologists have long studied ways to help quell anxiety, and while potential solutions are certainly not one-size-fits-all, they’re worth exploring.
One such idea is called the “6:30 p.m. rule,” which, according to a recent piece on MSN, was popularized by journalist Mel Bradman, who was treated for chronic anxiety. The theory is that if we set a certain time each day to tell our minds, “no more worrying,” we can, in essence, “trick” our racing brains into slowing down.
“No Worry Time”
In an op-ed for The Guardian, Bradman described her anxiety and said she was intrigued when her Norwegian therapist suggested the technique during a session:
“I was stuck in a particularly vicious circle of over-thinking, (and) she said: ‘Tonight after 6.30pm is ‘No Worry Time.’ ‘What do you mean?’ I asked. ‘Exactly that. From 6.30pm until you wake up the next day, you’re not allowed to worry.’”
When she pushed back on how that might help her, she relayed the therapist’s words: “‘By giving your brain a rest, and allowing the other parts of you that aren’t driven by anxiety to come back in,’ she said. She told me that anxiety is a bully, and like all bullies, it needed to be put in its place.”
Bradman continued the practice and says it helped her reframe the idea of worry. “Last year, when I was travelling in Bangkok, I saw a sign in a bar that read ‘No worry zone.’ I loved it. It was a reminder that I could make my life a worry-free zone, and that you don’t have to be held hostage by anxiety – sometimes you can call the shots,” she wrote.
It’s 6:30 p.m. for a reason
The MSN article notes that choosing 6:30 p.m. isn’t random:
“The choice of 6:30 p.m. is not insignificant. After this time, the brain begins its recovery phase: the fatigue accumulated throughout the day often amplifies negative thoughts and rumination. Setting a limit allows you to interrupt this cycle before it takes over, offering genuine mental rest, much like a muscle after exercise. To give you an idea, one study estimates that we have an average of 6,200 thoughts per day. It’s impossible to control them all, but framing them within a specific timeframe is entirely feasible and helps reduce stress.”
Upworthy spoke with Lisa Chen, a licensed therapist, who explained why this can be successful.
“This rule works because it provides a cut-off and psychological boundary for anxiety,” she said. “Anxiety tends to seep into any unstructured space, especially in the evening when our minds are tired and our brains are more susceptible to ruminating and over-thinking.”
It’s about the prefrontal cortex
“Later in the day, our prefrontal cortex is less effective, while our emotional center, driven by our amygdala, can take over and make us more reactive,” Chen added. “That’s why our worries can feel louder at night, and a 6:30 p.m. cutoff helps create a concrete boundary and routine to shift us out of a problem-focused mode into recovery.”
Rachel Loftin, a psychologist with Prosper Health, also told Upworthy why 6:30 p.m. is a good benchmark.
“The ‘6:30 p.m. rule’ works because it sets a clear boundary at a time when the mind is more likely to drift into worry,” Loftin said. “Early evening is when the structure of the day falls away, so thoughts can expand unless something interrupts them. It also trains the brain through repetition. If you consistently stop engaging with worries after a set time, your mind starts to learn that evening isn’t the time for problem-solving, and those thoughts show up less.”
“It removes the need to decide when to stop”
Loftin says this can be especially helpful for neurodivergent patients.
“For neurodivergent adults, that clarity is especially helpful,” she said. “It removes the need to decide when to stop, making it easier to keep rumination from taking over the night.”
“Finish each day and be done with it”
Poet Ralph Waldo Emerson may have been on to something when he famously wrote:
“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.”
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New mom shares texts from her mother-in-law that exemplify postpartum depression support
This mother-in-law knows what she’s doing.
First-time motherhood can feel overwhelming in every way. Bringing a human into the world that you are responsible for and fall madly in love with is life-changing, to say the least. But when you add a layer of postpartum depression (PPD) onto that overwhelm, it can all feel like way too much to handle.
A mom shared texts her mother-in-law sent her when she was struggling with PPD with her firstborn, and people are loving them. The post from @mamaesterm provides a great example of what support looks like.
First, it’s important to note that one of the most important ways to support someone going through PPD is to encourage and help them seek professional help. Treatments are available.
Each text has a specific element that makes it particularly effective:
‘Can I come by and help tidy up while you take a nap with the baby?’
This message acknowledges that Mom needs sleep and also needs a clean home. Often, those needs are not compatible in the early weeks and months of motherhood. People tell you to “sleep when the baby sleeps,” but if you have a high-needs baby, nap time is often the only time you have to get things done. People will also say the state of your house doesn’t matter, but for many, if not most, it’s easier to manage mental health when the home is under control.
So, having someone ask if they can come and help with the house while Mom naps with the baby hits both needs simultaneously.
Helping with the house while Mom sleeps can be a huge help. ‘You’re doing such a great job, I know it’s hard sometimes. [heart emoji]‘
Encouragement is so important for new parents. It’s common to feel like you have no idea what you’re doing with a new baby, while desperately wanting to not screw it up. And when you’re struggling with PPD, the guilt over feeling unable to care for your child the way you want to makes all of that worse. Being told you’re doing a good job feels like a refreshing drink of water.
‘Look how sweet she is she’s the cutest little thing, I’m obsessed with the precious photo editing app you told me about.’ [baby photo]
When you’re wrapped up in all the feelings, hormones, and overwhelm of new motherhood with PPD piled on top of it, it’s easy to lose perspective. Seeing reality through a loved one’s eyes can sometimes help ease some of the distorted thinking.
The beauty in this message is there’s no shame or guilt attached to it. Some people might say something like, “Why are you sad? You have a beautiful, healthy baby!” which often just leads the mom to feeling guilty about feelings she can’t control. This text makes no judgments, and, in fact, reminds the mom of something positive she has done for her family.
Overwhelmed mother next to baby’s crib. ‘Pete mentioned it was a long night with baby girl. I’m doing a Starbucks run and will drop off breakfast for you on the porch.’
This one might just be the best. Asking if someone wants help is great. But sometimes just doing the thing without asking, especially if it’s not intrusive in any way, is the way to go. Saying, “I’m heading out for food. I’m going to grab you some and drop it on your porch,” removes any obligation from the equation. No decision had to be made. No pressure to interact or entertain, which can be a big load off. And no guilt over the state of the house or your lack of a shower, which is huge.
As one commenter wrote, “Starbucks left on the porch…that’s someone who just wants to love and help without intruding. She’s a gem, keep her.”
What are some common signs of PPD?
Hormonal fluctuations after birth can cause a lot of emotional ups and downs. What makes postpartum depression different from the “baby blues” is the intensity and severity of the downs.
According to the Cleveland Clinic, these symptoms can be signs you might be struggling with PPD:
- Feeling sad, worthless, hopeless, or guilty
- Worrying excessively or feeling on edge
- Loss of interest in hobbies or things you usually enjoy
- Changes in appetite or not eating
- Loss of energy and motivation
- Trouble sleeping or wanting to sleep all the time
- Crying for no reason or excessively
- Difficulty thinking or focusing
- Lack of interest in your baby or feeling anxious around your baby
If you’ve recently given birth and these symptoms sound familiar, definitely have a conversation about what you’re feeling with your doctor. And if you know someone who is struggling postpartum, support is crucial. In addition to helping them find professional help, providing encouragement and practical help, especially without having to be asked, can be invaluable.
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Parents start family tradition where kids pitch their ideas for the next vacation
“You could see his confidence building as he presented.”
Building confidence isn’t easy at any age, but for mom Kendra Alley, she is making sure she starts the process early. By getting creative, she’s teaching her young sons about confidence.
The married mom-of-three shared her family’s new tradition that doubles as a confidence-building technique. When each child turns 10 years old, they get to choose where the family goes on vacation.
The caveat: they must do a pitch-presentation explaining where they want to go and why. “In our family, turning 10 means you pick the family trip. Anywhere in the world. But you have to research it … and present it to us,” she explained in an Instagram post.
The pitch-presentation, explained
Alley told Upworthy more details about what the presentation entails, and why she and her husband have their sons do it.
“Whenever one of our boys turns 10, they get to choose anywhere in the world for a family trip. They have to research the destination, and present it to the family,” she shared. “We give them a simple outline to follow (where, why, things you want to do, things your want to buy, things you want to eat, etc.) We love that it teaches them budgeting, planning, public speaking, patience (they make the presentation about two months in advance, but we know their location months before that), and gratitude all wrapped into something exciting and memorable.”
She adds, “One of my favorite parts is that they have to think about and anticipate the trip for a long time. In a world of instant gratification, there’s something really special about waiting, preparing, and building excitement as a family. I honestly think the anticipation makes the experience even sweeter for them. They don’t want to waste a second.”
The tradition began in 2024, when their oldest son turned 10. He chose to go to Loch Lyme in New Hampshire (and drive there in an RV). And this year, her second oldest son turned 10. For his trip, he chose Hawaii.
Her second son gives his presentation
Alley captioned the video of her second son Loch’s presentation, “I’m so proud of him, he was so nervous. You could see his confidence building as he presented.”
“Let’s do it!” Alley encourages him, and her husband shouts, “You’ve got this, my man!”
He stands in front of them in the family’s living room with a microphone and a presentation of slides on the TV. He is clearly nervous, and Alley says to him, “Just start by telling us why we’re here!”
As he speaks about his dream to travel to Hawaii (while dressed in an on-theme Hawaiian shirt), he visibly becomes more secure in himself as he details things he wants to eat (like shaved ice), the top things he wants to see (“Mauna Kea and Mauna Loa which are the twin mountains that kind of look like butt cheeks”), and do (like swim with sharks), and more.
She also told Upworthy, “This video was from our middle son’s presentation for Hawaii. My eldest’s trip was two years ago, and MUCH different. I think parents are craving meaningful experiences and traditions that bring everyone together.”
Viewers respond
Many parents and viewers were inspired by the Alley’s family tradition, and shared their thoughts in the comments:
“Love this. As someone who teaches people public speaking and presentation skills, this is amazing. I have never thought about having my own kids develop their skills in this area.”
“Bravo to the parents. Persuasive speaking, presentation design, research, and then he gets the experiences of travel on top of it. I love this 👏.”
“I implore folks to MAKE YOUR KID DO SMALL PRESENTATIONS LIKE THIS AS EARLY AND OFTEN AS POSSIBLE! Thank me later! —-A former high school public speaking teacher.”
“Love his close – end with a question and a big ask. He’s got a future in sales 👏.”
“I told my daughter we were doing this after you told me this idea and she is pre-planning for Japan 😭🙏🏼🤣.”
“I love someone who dresses the theme!”
“This is the sweetest 🥹❤️.”
“I just love this so much! Such epic parenting….from a non parent 😂.”
“Stealing this for my future children.”
