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Woman's viral thread is a moving reminder of when the first companies supported Pride

It wasn't so long ago that public support of Pride was a truly brave and life-affirming choice.

pride, corporate pride, lgbtqia branding
Photo by Norbu GYACHUNG on Unsplash

Pride has become overrun by brands, but it wasn't always the case.

Recently, I went with my family to Target, one of our favorite stores. We were only going for a couple of things, but our plans were derailed as soon as we walked in (which is often how it goes at that store). What caught our eyes this time? Target had already put up its Pride display. My partner and I excitedly searched through accessories like sunglasses and mini flags, looking specifically for items featuring the lesbian pride flag. I successfully grabbed an accessory bag plus a pair of rainbow sunglasses for my kiddo before eagerly heading over to the main display.

In recent years, the Target display for Pride has become one of my favorite parts about the month of June. As a queer woman, I like the ease of being able to get something to show my queerness while I’m also picking up household items. It’s nice to be able to buy rainbow kitchen towels that I know I will proudly use all year round. At the same time, I still feel weird about it. Because it goes beyond a T-shirt or a flag. You can’t walk down an aisle without seeing a rainbow adorn something it normally doesn’t—wine, deodorant, even hot sauce.

While it’s nice to see brands acknowledge that June is Pride month, it still feels like overkill. But a friend shared a Twitter thread with me that reminded me of something very important. While rainbow capitalism still leaves a lot to be desired, there was a time in the not so distant past that brands wouldn’t even acknowledge the LGBTQIA+ community. And while we still have a long way to go, we have to give space to that past.

Sigrid Ellis, whose Twitter bio lists her as an “editor, air traffic controller, parent, feminist, writer, queer,” tweeted:

“As an Elder Queer I want everyone during on corporate gayness to just know a smidge of history. Companies used to refuse our money. Car dealerships would turn us away. Banks would refuse us mortgages. Restaurants and grocery stores would ask us to leave.”

It’s easy to forget the time before the LGBTQIA+ community was as accepted as we are now. However, our history is a lot more recent than people remember, and there are still many queer elders who remember how different things were in the '80s and '90s, which was only 30-something years ago. Ellis is talking more specifically of that time, when Pride was far more radical and significantly less corporate. But also, a time when vocally supporting gay people would do a lot more forward-facing damage to a company than it does now.

Ellis explains that when brands sponsored Pride, it meant that they were safe. And for those who were out at a time where it was significantly less safe to be visible, that meant something. It doesn’t mean they’re perfect allies to the community—but their vocal support in spite of knowing it could affect their bottom line says a lot.

“When Subaru sponsored a float at Pride, it meant we could buy cars there with dignity.

"When Target marched at Pride, it meant my gf and I could go shopping together.

"My first mortgage was from Wells Fargo bank because they would accept gay money,” Ellis wrote.

There’s a reason for the jokey stereotype about lesbians who drive Subarus. It’s because the company wasn’t afraid to stand with the LGBTQIA+ community when no other car companies would. That makes a difference when you’re making such a large purchase. And like I said, Target has been there for a while. I’ve watched the Pride section grow exponentially over the last few years, going from a few vague shirts with rainbows to having items for asexual, nonbinary and aromantic folks. They have family Pride outfits that feature same sex parents (though it would be awesome if they made shirts for the kids of those parents).

It was only 10 years ago, in June 2012, that the internet melted down when Oreo posted a photo in support of Pride. The image of the iconic cookie, posted on Facebook a year and a day after gay marriage was legalized in New York, featured six rainbow-colored layers of creme. The words over the image read “June 25 Pride.” The post was captioned “Proudly support love!” according to an article from Time. “Many commenters have denounced the company for supporting gay rights and for taking on political positions unrelated to its cookie-production mission,” the article stated. In a testament to how time moves things forward, Oreo has special Pride packaging this year.

Do we still have a long way to go before corporate Pride won’t feel like a moral dilemma? Absolutely. But if we keep pushing the needle forward with the understanding of the past, we just might get there.

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A 6-year-old designed a custom t-shirt for his first day of school and it's seriously the best

Thank you, Blake, for bringing some much-needed sunshine into our day.

Unfading adornments

When 6-year-old Blake Rajahn shows up to his first grade classroom on Monday, he will arrive bearing an uplifting a message for his fellow students.

Blake's mother, Nikki Rajahn, runs a custom personalization business in Fayette County, Georgia, and she asked her son what kind of t-shirt he wanted for his first day of school. He could have chosen anything—his favorite sports star's number, a cool dragon, a witty saying—anything he wanted, she could make.

Blake chose something unexpected—an orange t-shirt with a simple, sweet message for the other kids at his school to see. Five little words that might just mean the world to someone who reads them.

"I will be your friend."

Ouch. My heart.

Rajahn shared the story on her business Facebook page:

"I have to brag on my son. I told him that as a back to school gift, I will make him any shirt he would like. It could have anything—a basketball theme, football, etc. which are all his favorites. He thought a while and said, 'will you please make me a shirt that says "I will be your friend" for all the kids who need a friend to know that I am here for them?' Never underestimate your kid's heart for others! I love my sweet Blake! #stopbullying"







Apparently, such a gesture is typical of Blake. "He has always had a heart for others and is very genuine," his mother told Upworthy. She said she's donating part of the proceeds of her t-shirt sales to the Real Life Center, a non-profit that helps families in need in Tyrone, Georgia, all because of Blake.

"During the summer we had a vacation Bible school that he went to," she said, "and they did a toothbrush and toothpaste drive for the Real Life Center. He came home saying we needed to go to the Dollar Store to get some that night. We told him we would go the next day, but he had to use his money for it. He said that was fine, so we asked how much he would like to spend. He said, 'It's for people who don't have any, right?' We said yes, so he very matter-of-fact said, 'Well all of it!' And he did!"

Rajahn said everyone has been very encouraging and people are starting to order their own version of the t-shirt with "#blakesfriends" added to it.

She also shared Blake's reaction to hearing that his shirt idea was starting to spread on Facebook—and again, it's just the sweetest darn thing.

"Ever since I posted about my son and his shirt, I have sold some and told Blake about it. He said, "Oh good! Now more and more people are going to have more and more friends!" He is just so flattered so many want to be his twin too 😊"

Sometimes all a person needs is one friend so they won't feel alone, and Blake going out of his way to make sure kids feel welcomed by him is an example even adults can learn from. If we all reached out to people who might be shy or who might feel excluded, and let them know in some small way that we are open to being friends, what a better world we could build.

Thank you, Blake, for bringing some much-needed sunshine into our day.


This article originally appeared on 8.2.19

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Culture

In 1972, an Italian singer wrote a hit song with English-sounding gibberish and it's so trippy

Seriously, this might be the catchiest 2 minutes of utter nonsense ever recorded.

Le Pietre Rotolanti/YouTube, @HarrietMould/Twitter

Sometimes it seems like social media is too full of trolls and misinformation to justify its continued existence, but then something comes along that makes it all worth it.

Apparently, a song many of us have never heard of shot to the top of the charts in Italy in 1972 for the most intriguing reason. The song, written and performed by Adriano Celentano and is called "Prisencolinensinainciusol" which means...well, nothing. It's gibberish. In fact, the entire song is nonsense lyrics made to sound like English, and oddly, it does.

Occasionally, you can hear what sounds like a real word or phrase here and there—"eyes" and "color balls died" and "alright" a few times, for example—but it mostly just sounds like English without actually being English. It's like an auditory illusion and it does some super trippy things to your brain to listen to it.

Plus the video someone shared to go with it is fantastic. It's gone crazy viral because how could it not.

And if you thought that video was something, check out another one of the same song by the same singer. Why are there two videos? Who knows. But this is truly one of the most 1970s things that has ever happened.

Adriano Celentano - Prisencolinensinainciusolwww.youtube.com

Wow, right?

In a 2012 interview on NPR's All Things Considered, Celentano explained how the silly pop song came about.

"Ever since I started singing, I was very influenced by American music and everything Americans did," he told Guy Raz, through interpreter Sim Smiley.

"So at a certain point, because I like American slang—which, for a singer, is much easier to sing than Italian—I thought that I would write a song which would only have as its theme the inability to communicate," he said. "And to do this, I had to write a song where the lyrics didn't mean anything."

In fact, Celentano didn't even write down any lyrics for the song at first, but just improvised the sounds. And people didn't appear to care. "Prisencolinensinainciusol" reached number one on the charts not only in Italy, but also in France, Germany, and Belgium.

Celentano's ability to sound like he's singing in English without actually saying anything in English is pretty impressive. Especially when you hear him sing in Italian, like this:

Adriano Celentano - L'emozione non ha voce - Official Video (With Lyrics/Parole in descrizione)www.youtube.com

Languages are fun. And funky. And frustrating when you don't understand them. Celentano was purposefully making a point with "Prisencolinensinainciusol" to break down language barriers and inspire people to communicate more. Whether he succeeded in doing that or not, it sure is entertaining to see him try.


This article originally appeared on 12.1.20

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Hospice nurse shares clue she uses to know if someone is dying 6 months before it happens

"Allow the body to be the guide."

via Sabinevanerp/Pixabay

An old woman holding a cane.

Death is the last great mystery that all of us face. We don’t know when we will go or can really be sure what comes next. So there’s understandably a lot of fear and uncertainty that most of us feel around death, whether we’re thinking about ourselves or a loved one.

That’s why Julie McFadden's work is so important. As a palliative care nurse in the Los Angeles area, who has seen over a hundred people die, her TikTok videos shed light on the process to make us all a bit more comfortable with the inevitable.

McFadden is also the author of the bestseller, “Nothing to Fear.”

The nurse’s experience helping people in their final stages has given her a unique perspective on the process. In a recent video, she shared how she can see the first symptoms that someone is going to die a natural death about 6 months before they finally do.

Interestingly, she can determine that someone only has half a year left to live when most of us have no idea they have entered the final stages of life.

@hospicenursejulie

Replying to @Mariah educating yourself about scary topics will help decrease fear. ✨Nothing to Fear ✨- my book- out june 11th #hospicenursejulie #hospicenurse #caregiversoftiktok #medicaltiktok #learnontiktok #nothingtofearbook

What are the symptoms of dying at the 6-month mark?

McFadden adds that people who are dying are usually placed in hospice care when the symptoms begin to appear around the 6-month mark.

"You will have very generalized symptoms. Those symptoms will usually be, one, you will be less social. So you'll be more introverted than extroverted," McFadden said. "Two, you will be sleeping a lot more. And three, you will be eating and drinking a lot less. Literally, everyone on hospice, I see this happen to."

heaven, clouds, ray of lightA Ray of light over a mountain. via PIxbay/Pexels



What are the symptoms of dying at the 3-month mark?

You are going to notice more debility,” McFadden continues. “They will be staying in their house most of the time. It's going to be difficult getting up and just going to the bathroom. Again, sleeping a lot more and eating and drinking a lot less.”

What are the symptoms of dying at the 1-month mark?

Something usually begins to happen in the final month of someone’s life. They start to believe they are in contact with others they have lost. It’s like they are there to make the dying person feel comfortable with their final transition.

"Usually around the one month mark is when people will start seeing 'the unseen', they have the visioning. They'll be seeing dead relatives, dead loved ones, dead pets, old friends who have died,” McFadden said. “Again, not everyone — but many, many people will start seeing these things at around one month."

heaven, death, trumpetAn angel with a trumpet.via PixaBay/Pexels

Angela Morrow, a registered nurse at Verywell Health, agrees that people in the final stage of life often hear from those who have passed before them. Morrow says we should refrain from correcting the patients when they share their stories of talking to people and pets who have died. "You might feel frustrated because you can't know for sure whether they're hallucinating, having a spiritual experience, or just getting confused. The uncertainty can be unsettling, but it's part of the process," Morrow writes.

At the end of the video, McFadden says that the most important factors palliative care nurses look at to determine the stage of death are eating, drinking and sleeping. “Most people, a few weeks out from death, will be sleeping more than they are awake. And they will be barely eating and barely drinking,” McFadden said.

i.giphy.com

In the end, hospice nurses “allow the body to be the guide” as they help their patients transition from life to death.

McFadden’s work has brought a lot of peace to her followers as they go through trying times. "My mom is in hospice right now and she’s currently, I think, hours or days from death. YourTikToks have helped me out tremendously," Deb wrote. "My grandma passed away in February, and she experienced all of this. this page brings me peace knowing everything she went through was natural," Jaida added.

"Thanks, Julie. I volunteer in a hospice end-of-life facility, and this helps educate the families. Your posts are wonderful," Grandma Nita wrote.

One of the things that makes death so scary is the number of unknowns surrounding the process. That’s why it’s so important that McFadden shares her stories of helping people to the next side. She shows that death is a natural process and that hospice nurses are here to help make the transition as peaceful as possible.

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Dad shares his 'complaints' about a tiny Black-Owned Business owner, and it's too adorable

"I been waiting on my order to get done for 45 minutes, and I'm the only customer here."

Christopher Kyle/Instagram

Being the parent of a toddler is a unique joy that only lasts for a fleeting season, which is why you have to take full advantage of it while you can. And one dad is clearly doing just that.

Christopher Kyle is father to adorable, 18-month-old Ava, who treated her dad to a meal at her sit-down restaurant. Only according to Kyle, the service left much to be desired.

In a post on Instagram, Kyle shared a photo of Ava in her play kitchen while he sat waiting for his food in a tiny chair at a tiny table. He wrote:

"So I tried to support another Black Owned Business for lunch today. It's called Ava's Kitchen, just opened end of April. It's a very clean establishment, but whewww let me tell you about this owner.

First off, I asked why there are balloons on my chair, and it's not my birthday? She talm'bout, mind yah business; those are Mommy's.

I been waiting on my order to get done for 45 minutes, and I'm the only customer here. She was making good progress at first, then she stopped for 20 minutes to go watch Paw Patrol.

Overall the customer service could be better, but the cook is a cutie; so I'll give her another chance. Let's not give up on Black businesses so fast after one mistake. 💕"

People absolutely loved this dad's humor and clearly stellar parenting skills. Anyone who has sat through a tea party—or any activity with the wee ones—knows that for all of its cuteness, toddler play is an exercise in patience and endurance.

Upworthy shared Kyle's story well on on our Instagram page and our readers did not disappoint.

Some played right along with the game:

"Starting a restaurant is tough.. give her a chance ❤️❤️"

"I mean, she started a restaurant during a global pandemic, give her a break 😂"

"Is she taking reservations?"

Fans of Paw Patrol had some words:

"Paw Patrol is a must watch so 🤷🏾♀️😂"

"I died at Paw Patrol 🤣🤣🤣 that's my show though. I don't have kids I just watch it just because lmao."

"Paw Patrol break is mandatory. Too cute! ♥️"

Others just gushed over the entire scene:

"Love EVERYTHING about this!! The adorable owner, the custumer's humor and the incredible love"

"That's the cutest restaurant owner I've ever seen. The dad's face is priceless! 😂👍❤️"

"LoL the story is funny & beautiful!!! This warms my heart!! This babygirl will grow up to have such a healthy look at men (in any capacity) as long as she & her Daddy keep such a beautiful bond!! Happy Father's Day (early) Keep encouraging her to do her thing and her confidence will continue to soar!! I just love this!! 😍😍😍"

Well done, dad. And well done, Ava. Can't wait to see you open your own real business someday, baby girl.


This article originally appeared on 5.28.20

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In his last interview, Carl Sagan warned that America will be taken over by a 'charlatan' political leader

Sagan never would have believed in a fortune tellers but dang this is prescient.

via PBS

Astronomer Carl Sagan was the original host of "Cosmos" back in 1980 and it became most watched show in public television history. Few science communicators have been able to match his talent for stoking wonder about the universe.

Shortly before his death in 1996, he appeared on "Charlie Rose" and made a dire warning about how the average Americans' lack of skeptical, scientific thinking could lead to disastrous consequences.

Today, we can see the problems that are happening due to America's anti-science streak whether it's anti-vaxxers, conspiracy theories or climate change deniers.

Sagan was right, America will suffer due to a lack a lack of scientific skepticism.


Carl Sagan and Government_ Charlie Rose.wmvwww.youtube.com


"We've arranged a society on science and technology in which nobody understands anything about science and technology, and this combustible mixture of ignorance and power sooner or later is going to blow up in our faces," he told Rose. "I mean, who is running the science and technology in a democracy if the people don't know anything about it?"

He then warned that our lack of critical thinking leaves us vulnerable to those who wish to exploit our ignorance.

"Science is more than a body of knowledge, it's a way of thinking," he says. "If we are not able to ask skeptical questions to interrogate those who tell us something is true to be skeptical of those in authority, then we're up for grabs for the next charlatan political or religious who comes ambling along."

Sagan believes that a democracy cannot function without an educated populace.

"It's a thing that Jefferson lay great stress on. It wasn't enough, he said, to enshrine some rights in the Constitution and the Bill or Rights, the people had to be educated and they have to practice their skepticism and their education," he says. "Otherwise, we don't run the government, the government runs us."


This article originally appeared on 9.4.20

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