upworthy
Add Upworthy to your Google News feed.
Google News Button
More

A 5th-grader wrote 7 rules for talking to girls — but grown-ups could learn from them too.

When school began in 2016, Zoë was already over it.

Specifically, she was fed up with a boy in her class named Noah, who, like many fifth-grade boys, hadn't quite figured out how to flirt with girls in a way that's not intrusive and obnoxious.

According to Twitter user @WhosDenverJones, a reported friend of the kids' teacher, Zoë did try to let Noah down easy. Unfortunately, Noah was stubborn and persistent, like kids can be in the heat of their first big crush.

Zoë took matters into her own hands, writing him a colorful letter that laid down the ground rules of courtship, consent, and general communication of romantic intent:

Zoë's letter is obviously cute and hilarious. But it's also painfully poignant — and, unfortunately, relevant to relationships beyond the fifth grade.

Obviously, Noah's still just a kid and we should forgive his preadolescent oversights. Chances are, the poor kid genuinely didn't know any better, and now he's feeling heartbroken and confused. As a former fifth-grade boy myself, I can relate.

That doesn't mean we should just let it slide, of course. There are plenty of grown men in this world who still haven't figured out the lessons that Zoë put forth in her letter. But everybody's gotta learn some time, and a fifth-grade heartbreak is the perfect opportunity to drive the point home.

Let's break it down:

1. "Do not touch my shoulders."

This is a pretty simple request. Zoë — like all women — doesn't need a guy's help brushin' off her shoulders. Her body is her body, just like anyone's body. It belongs to her and her alone.

GIF via KellyRowlandVEVO/YouTube.

2. "Do not get behind me with all that playing + foolishness. (Don't get behind me at all.)"

Again with the personal space invasion! Listen, people: Just because you're not touching someone doesn't mean it's OK to crowd them.

This isn't limited to intentional crowding either. Sometimes guys tend to take up more space anyway, even when we don't mean to. So pay attention to your own personal bubble, and be aware of other people's bubbles around you too.

GIF from "The New Girl."

3. "Do not speak to me unless it's a greeting, which will be never."

I hate to break it to you, bros, but no one owes you a conversation. If someone doesn't want to talk, then don't talk to them. It doesn't matter if you think you're being nice or polite or complimentary. If they don't wanna hear it, then it's just plain obnoxious.

(Also, protip: Never try to start a conversation by yelling at someone from across the street.)

GIF from "Bachelor in Paradise."

4. "Stop playing with me on the bus."

This might sound adorably specific to Zoë and Noah's schoolyard situation, but it's actually something that affects a lot of women when they're out in public — at every age and in every part of the country.

Just because you have a captive audience doesn't mean you should hold them captive and force them to interact with you. Next time you're out in the park or waiting for the train and you see a cute woman chillin' with her headphones on and a copy of "The Handmaid's Tale" in her lap? Leave her alone, please and thanks.

GIF from "The Adventures of Pete & Pete."

5. "I have a short temper with people and you ruin my day because you play 2 much."

There are two things going on here: First, when someone tells you straight-up what they need in order to maintain their own mental well-being, you should listen. It doesn't matter if they convey it verbally or physically (read: sitting and waiting for the train, like above). Even if you find that kind of self-assurance to be incredibly attractive, the best way to honor it is by not bothering her.

The second truth that young Zoë hits on is that women often have to work extra hard to get the credit and recognition they deserve. That's not your fault, but it is unfortunately the way our society works. That means she ain't got time for your games, and you should respect that too. (Especially when she's being so forward about it.)

Remember, kids, it's not misandry if you're just being obnoxious and/or an evil thug in service of Justin Hammer's insidious agenda. GIF from "Iron Man 2."

6. "Reread 500 times."

Zoë might only be in fifth grade herself, but she's articulating the same frustrations of every woman who's ever lived and is similarly sick of having to repeat these exact same points over and over and over again.

Don't act dumb. I know you've heard all this stuff before. And if you think you haven't, it's probably because you haven't been paying attention.

But maybe you'll listen to another dude — me — when he tells you: Let it go.

GIF from "Frozen." Kind of.

7. "You like me (as a gf) but I don't like you (as a bf). I'm too young!"

This is the central idea of "consent," just in case you still weren't clear on the other points that Zoë made: No means no, bro. And that's that.

GIF of Amber Rose on "It's Not You, It's Men" with Reverend Run and Tyrese.

Zoë's letter can basically be boiled down to one crucial point: Instead of letting "boys be boys," we need to teach them that consent is important and that no one is entitled to someone else's body, time, or affections.

Preferably, we would start that education well before fifth grade, but when it comes to kids like Noah, it's better late than never.

In an ideal world, Zoë wouldn't have been forced to express herself with such entertaining eloquence.

But the fact that a fifth-grade girl is able to be so forward with her feelings and articulate the frustrations that so many other women are feeling? That's pretty cool. It means that something's changing in the world, and it's absolutely for the better.

From Your Site Articles
More
Innovation

Ontario teen says he'll live in 'modular home' invention for a year to prove it can end homelessness

He's already invented a wooden car.

ideas, homelessness, prodigy, social work, solutions
Photo credit: @ribalzebian on Instagram

Ribal Zebian is going to test a house he designed by living in it for a year.

Ribal Zebian, a student from the city of London in Ontario, Canada, already made headlines last year when he built an electric car out of wood and earned a $120,000 scholarship from it. Now, he's in the news again for something a little different. Concerned with homelessness in his hometown, Zebian got to work creating a different kind of affordable housing made from fiberglass material. In fact, he’s so confident in his idea that the 18-year-old plans on living in it for a year to test it out himself.

Currently an engineering student at Western University, Zebian was concerned by both the rising population of the unhoused in his community and the rising cost of housing overall. With that in mind, he conjured up a blueprint for a modular home that would help address both problems.

Zebian’s version of a modular home would be made of fiberglass panels and thermoplastic polyethylene terephthalate (PET) foam. He chose those materials because he believes they can make a sturdy dwelling in a short amount of time—specifically in just a single day.

“With fiberglass you can make extravagant molds, and you can replicate those,” Zebian told CTV News. “It can be duplicated. And for our roofing system, we’re not using the traditional truss method. We’re using actually an insulated core PET foam that supports the structure and structural integrity of the roof.”

Zebian also believes these homes don’t have to be purely utilitarian—they can also offer attractive design and customizable features to make them personal and appealing.

“Essentially, what I’m trying to do is bring a home to the public that could be built in one day, is affordable, and still carries some architecturally striking features,” he said to the London Free Press. “We don’t want to be bringing a house to Canadians that is just boxy and that not much thought was put into it.”

Beginning in May 2026, Zebian is putting his modular home prototype to the test by living inside of a unit for a full year with the hope of working out any and all kinks before approaching manufacturers.

“We want to see if we can make it through all four seasons- summer, winter, spring, and fall,” said Zebian. “But that’s not the only thing. When you live in something that long and use it, you can notice every single mistake and error, and you can optimize for the best experience.”

While Zebian knows that his modular homes aren't a long-term solution to either the homeless or housing crisis, he believes they could provide an inexpensive option to help people get the shelter they need until certain policies are reformed so the unhoused can find affordable permanent dwellings.

@hard.knock.gospel

What to buy for the homeless at the grocery store. 🛒 Most people get it wrong. After being there myself, these are the survival items that actually matter 💯 The 2nd to last one is about more than survival—it’s about DIGNITY. We are all one circumstance away from the same shoes 🙏 SAVE this for your next grocery run. 📌 IG@hardknockgospel Substack@ Outsiders_Anonymous #homelessness #helpingothers #kindness #payitforward #learnontiktok

Zebian’s proposal and experiment definitely inspires others to try to help, too. If you wish to lend a hand to the unhoused community in your area in the United States, but don’t know where to look, you can find a homeless shelter or charity near you through here. Whether it’s through volunteering or through a donation, you can help make a difference.

From Your Site Articles
homelessness
InnovationScience
Friendship

An NFL reporter was criticized for consoling the losing coach, then fans came out to defend her

"You can call me fake all you want to, honey. I’ve been doing this a long time.”

reporters, journalists, tv, press conference, NFL, football, sports, coach, kindness, humanity
Photo credit: Canva

A reporter gave an NFL coach a pep talk after a loss, sparking a firestorm of criticism.

The Jacksonville Jaguars haven't won a playoff game in three years, and have just a handful of postseason victories in their short history. They have never been to a Super Bowl, making them just one of four teams in the NFL never to do so. That's why, after fielding one of the franchise's best teams in years, their latest quick playoff exit was a hard one for fans and the team itself to swallow. It was heartbreaking and gut-wrenching for nearly everyone in the Jacksonville area.

After suffering a narrow defeat at the hands of the Buffalo Bills this past weekend, head coach of the Jaguars Liam Coen took the podium to answer questions and accept accountability for the loss. Business as usual, despite how demoralized he was feeling.

One of the questions, however, was far from the usual fare. A Jacksonville Free Press associate editor named Lynn Jones-Turpin raised her hand and chose to use her time to give the coach words of encouragement instead of a hardball question.

"I’m going to tell you, congratulations on your success, young man," she said. "You hold your head up. You guys have had a most magnificent season. You did a great job out there today. You just hold your head up, OK? Ladies and gentlemen, Duval. You keep it going. We got another season. Much continued success to you and the entire team."

The warm, rousing words had a visible effect on Coen, who began beaming while nodding gracefully. "Thank you, ma'am," he said with genuine appreciation.

Talk about a legendary pep talk. You can watch the roughly 30-second moment here:

- YouTube www.youtube.com

The brief interaction was picked up by national sports reporters and celebrated as a wholesome moment of compassion between two professionals.

Adam Schefter of ESPN called it an "awesome" moment. His post highlighting the interview got nearly 20 million views on X.

Commenters found the compassionate exchange extremely refreshing coming from the usually cutthroat world of sports, where reporters and coaches spar and trade passive-aggressive barbs. They're often pitted against each other as enemies, with reporters seeking transparency and accountability and coaches just wanting to be left alone to coach. Coen and Jones-Turpin broke the mold—for one afternoon at least.

"Whoever she works for needs to give her a raise. We need more people like this in the world!" one wrote.

"This really is wonderful. It’s fun watching his facial gyrations while she talks to him like an aunty. You can see the kid in the man. Wonderful."

"Epically classy from that reporter. Not the finish they wanted, but this squad showed heart all year."

"This healed me and I’m not even a Jags fan" someone added.

While not strictly professional, the moment between Coen and Jones-Turpin was a rare thing of beauty. But that didn't stop the curmudgeons from questioning the reporter's professionalism and journalistic integrity.

Many fans (notably, of non-Jaguars teams) and members of legacy media were quick to point out that a reporter consoling a coach after a loss is not a good display of journalism ethics.

Hosts on Fox News Sports Radio said, "This is a No-No. She sounds like a fan."

Jemele Hill, a writer for The Atlantic, wrote on X, " It’s literally the first lesson you learn — you aren’t a fan. You can love sports. You can be a fan of competition and games. But you are absolutely not a fan," while expressing distaste at how Jones-Turpin handled the interaction.

AP reporter Mark Long, in a now deleted post, called the question "embarrassing" and questioned Jones-Turpin' credentials, calling her "fake news."

The back and forth between supporters appreciative of her words and people looking for journalists to hold a hard line in the sand became quite a kerfuffle in social media, racking up millions and millions of interactions.

Lynn Jones-Turpin was finally given a chance to respond in an interview on local Jacksonville news, and she defended herself beautifully: By not feeling the need to defend herself at all.

"It was just an overwhelming day. I can tell you that this entire city, this town, our team, our city, and our coach, we were overwhelmed. ... Coach came out, and he was just... emotions. He was totally immersed in his feelings. He had tears, he bit his lip."

She then had a chance to address her critics head on. "I don't take no offense to it. Listen, I've been in this business more than 25 years. I've interviewed from Barack Obama to Terry Bradshaw to Tiger Woods. He can say whatever he wants about fake news. I am a member of the Black Press," she said, adding that Black-run newspapers like hers have been around for longer than most modern media outlets. "Support the Black Press. You can call me fake all you want to, honey. I’ve been doing this a long time.”

Adding more context, journalist Phil Lewis writes, "The Black Press never agreed to conform to the mainstream media’s ideal of 'objectivity.' In fact, the first Black newspaper aimed to distinguish itself from other newspapers of its time. This is not to say the pursuit of truth isn’t important, but realizing that 'objectivity' has always reinforced white worldviews."

Jones-Turpin then joked that she was the new "grandma" or "auntie" of the team.

Especially after her earnest appearance and non-apologetic attitude for her approach, the support for Jones-Turpin has been far louder than the criticism.

In a way, coaches and the reporters who cover their teams are coworkers. They interact on a near daily basis, and while they butt heads frequently, they both do what they do out of a shared love for the sport and even for the city they work for.

The game is ultimately just a game, but the emotions and real-life stakes are very real.

When emotions are high, who's to say they're not allowed a brief moment of humanity and compassion for one another? There are far worse things happening in the world—that much is for certain.

From Your Site Articles
sports
FriendshipJoy
Education

Public speaking expert shares the 3 'magic' phrases that instantly make you more likable

It's all about being genuinely open and curious.

party, chatting, likable, drinks small talk, men and women
via Canva/Photos

A woman speaking with two men at a party.

When we think of someone likable, we often imagine a person with a big personality who's the life of the party. We conjure up images of social butterflies and people who keep everyone at the dinner party glued to their every word when they tell a story. The funny thing is, according to research, that's not really the case.

Studies show that the easiest way to make someone like you is to show interest by asking questions during the conversation and making it clear that you like them. People also really love those who come off as genuine.

Michael Gendler, a co-founder of Ultraspeaking, a platform that helps people master the art of public speaking, recently shared three "magic" phrases that make you more likable, all of which align with what science tells us.

Three phrases that make you more likable

Phrase 1: "Here's what really scares me..."

This phrase resonates with people because it shows you're genuine by admitting your vulnerability. "Man, talk about your feats, real fears, not like 'Oh, I'm scared I'm going to be too successful.' Tell us about something that actually scares you. Don't be guarded. Be open, and other people will appreciate that," Gendler says.

Phrase 2: "You know what I really like about you?"

This phrase makes people like you because it counters a psychological phenomenon known as signal amplification bias, which suggests we tend to overestimate how clearly we express our feelings to others. This means that, many times, when we think others know we like them, they may not be so sure. So a little assurance goes a long way toward showing them the feeling is mutual. "People love being complimented as long as it is genuine," Gendler says.


Phrase 3: "Tell me more"

As Dale Carnegie wrote in How to Make Friends and Influence People, the key to interacting with others is focusing on being interested in them rather than trying to impress them by being interesting. "Be interested, not interesting," Carnegie writes.

A Harvard study supports this, showing that when you first start speaking with someone, you should follow your first question with two more. People who do this are rated as much more likable than those who, after one question, shift the conversation to themselves. "People love feeling like what they're saying is interesting. So invite them to speak more," Gendler continues.


Don't forget to be genuine

Ultraspeaking's post is a breath of fresh air for those who aren't comfortable trying to impress others at parties, on dates, or in the office. The video shows that if you make people feel important, they're much more likely to like you in return. The key is that it has to come from the heart.

"Remember, don't just use these phrases and expect them to work," Gendler says. "They have to be genuine and open. That's what makes people likable."

From Your Site Articles
communication tips
EducationLearning
Culture

The 'honk if you…' bumper sticker sparks spirited debate about what honking really means

"I am almost 80 and have never heard the second interpretation. That is ridiculous."

honk bumper sticker, bumper sticker, driving, car honking, internet debate, car horn
Photo credit: Canva, aleksandrkondratov (left, cropped) / rofapic (text box) / Aflo Images from アフロ（Aflo) (right, cropped)

What does the honking mean in a "honk if you..." bumper sticker?

Novelty bumper stickers come in many varieties: proud displays of solidarity, cultural and political co-signs, and even unhinged silliness. But if you ask someone to name a famous example, there's a good chance they'll choose one that starts with the phrase "Honk if you…"

What exactly are these stickers trying to express, though? If one reads "Honk if you love dogs," does honking simply mean you also love dogs? Apparently there are two very different schools of thought, and dozens of people went online to debate how we should be interpreting these seemingly simple messages.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Fandom or snark?

"So what I've heard is that those 'honk if you like ice cream🍦' license plates can be read two different ways," one user wrote on Reddit. "1. The idea is that this person is broadcasting that they like this particular thing a lot. 2. It's kind of a joke that they're going to ignore you honking at them, because you must just be responding to the bumper sticker, not saying they're a bad driver. It's meant to be kinda snarky."

The responses seem roughly split 50/50, with tons of people expressing their shock in both directions. Here are some of the top comments:

"Not sure if it's bulls--- or not but I have never until this moment considered option 2"

"I am almost 80 and have never heard the second interpretation. That is ridiculous."

"I always thought of it the first way, it was recently explained to me to be the second—I forget which show I was watching, maybe Gilmore Girls, and she was doing an experiment to honk at people who have 'honk if you like _____' stickers and the drivers would get mad at her for honking. So she was theorizing that people who have those types of bumper stickers don't actually want you to honk at them. Which I guess makes it option two in reality and that's the joke."

honking, car honking, car horn, honk debate, bumper sticker Someone honks a car horn. Photo credit: Canva, rattanakun

"Yeah I always took it the first way. 'I like ice cream and I want to get excited about it with other people who also like ice cream!' And I always thought it was stupid. Never even considered it the other way, which is also stupid."

"I've never considered it to be anything other than a person broadcasting their fandom."

"I always thought it was just a poll type thing until recently lol I learned of the #2 option. So bizarre"

"That's correct. It's meant to be interpreted the second way. It's a joke that if they are honking at you for driving poorly, you will ignore and assume they like pizza or whatever the sticker says."

"I think this is historical revisionism. I never heard definition #2 until a couple years ago. I've always taken it as definition #1."

"Hi. I have always seen the 2nd interpretation, because the first one makes no sense. Honking is not like making small talk in line at the grocery. Nobody wants every car to honk at each other to communicate their likes and dislikes."

"I've only seen the second explanation on social media in the last few months, which leads me to believe it's another TikTok originating thing along the lines of trying to redefine what '9 to 5' means."

@ellaellaw

Replying to @WILL (hozier’s version)

"It took me a really long time to grasp"

As for the TikTok mention, that user could be referring to a viral post from content creator Ella, who explained the second interpretation. "It took me a really long time to grasp," they said. "It's more like a 'ha, the joke's on you' from the car that you're honking at with that sticker on."

Thousands of other users weighed in with their reactions, including many instances of the popular response "WHAT?"

On a related note, lots of people have recently experienced a "today years old" learning moment related to a specific "honk" bumper sticker. In a Reddit thread, one user admitted, "I just realized the phrase 'honk if you're horny' is a pun about horns," and they weren't the only one making that realization. "I even hear this phrase a lot," someone added, "but never made the connection."

From Your Site Articles
cars
CultureJoy
Education

Communication expert shares 3-step reset method for dealing with extremely negative people

Some folks live to rain on your parade.

negativity, thumbs down, man in suit, judgement, no good, bad
via Canva/Photos

A man giving a big thumbs down.

Everyone has that person in their life who casts everything in a negative light. You go out for a great meal, only to hear them complain about the service. They never highlight anyone's positive qualities, just their faults, and the only joy they seem to get comes from putting down the things you love.

It's like they are programmed to be antagonistic about absolutely everything. The problem is that, whether they're friends, family members, or co-workers, we're stuck dealing with people who drain our energy and have a knack for ruining a good time.

Fortunately for us, communication expert Jefferson Fisher recently shared a three-step reset method on YouTube for dealing with these impossible people. Fisher, who has become massively popular on social media, offers tips "to help people argue less and talk more."


How to deal with negative people

Here is Fisher's three-step reset method for dealing with negative energy:

1. Don't absorb the negativity

"Don't absorb what they said," Fisher says. "Instead, we're going to call it out. You're going to say it out loud. That means when you claim it, you control it. Meaning, you control your own reactions to it. That's the takeaway there."

Examples include:

"This feels tense."

"This feels heated."

"I'm sensing some negativity."

2. Call out the truth, not the tone

"When that happens to the negative energy, you're going to send it right back by having them repeat it," he says. "How? It's very similar to how I recommend handling insults. See, they can't repackage it in the same way again when you ask them to repeat it the same way. They can't say it the same way. Then they just look terrible."

@arnaldo.sifre

Master Negative Energy_ React to Truth, Not Tone Discover the simple but powerful technique Jefferson Fisher uses to stop negative energy without arguing or escalating. Instead of reacting to someone’s tone, you focus on the truth behind their words. The method? ➡️ Ask them to repeat what they said. Most passive-aggressive people cannot package their negativity the same way twice. When they repeat it, the tone weakens and the truth comes out. If it’s still negative, calmly ask again: “I need you to say that again—better.” This forces clarity, removes hostility, and shifts the power back to you. Stop reacting to tone. Start uncovering truth. Transform every interaction starting today. #fyp #CommunicationSkills #JeffersonFisher #ConfidenceTips #EmotionalIntelligence #StopNegativity #PassiveAggressive #BetterConversations #MindsetMatters #HealthyBoundaries #LifeSkills #SpeakUp #PersonalGrowth #RelationshipSkills #foryourpage

3. Protect your presence

"You cannot control another person's mood," he adds. "You cannot make somebody happier. That is their choice. … Big takeaway: you are making sure that your mind acknowledges the negative energy, but it neither matches it nor tries to attach to it. That's the difference. That's how you handle the negative energy."

Here's the whole video:

- YouTube youtu.be

Why are some people so negative?

A primary reason some people are overwhelmingly negative is that they are extremely fearful and hyperfocus on the negative aspects of life.

"In brief, almost all negativity has its roots in one of three deep-seated fears: the fear of being disrespected by others, the fear of not being loved by others, and the fear that 'bad things' are going to happen," Raj Raghunathan, PhD, writes in Psychology Today.

Humans also have a negativity bias, which means we're more primed to respond to negative than positive stimuli. That's why we remember insults far more often than praise and are more likely to recall negative moments than positive ones.

Why all the negativity? It's a survival technique. People who can detect danger and harmful situations are much more likely to survive than those who focus on the positive. Unfortunately, we sometimes have to make a conscious effort to see the good in the world.

Even though negative people can be a burden to be around, taking Fisher's advice and refusing to let them affect our presence can turn them into a reminder to reset and refocus on the positive in life.

From Your Site Articles
communication tips
EducationLearning
Trending Stories