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Science

17 photos of animals that prove there's nothing natural about traditional gender roles

These animals demonstrate the greatness of nature and its stubborn unwillingness to conform to human expectations for the way things "should be."

animals, nature, gender roles, traditional
Image via Pixabay.

We have our eyes on you too.

Traditional gender roles are "natural," goes the common refrain.

Heterosexuality? That's natural too, apparently. Staying one gender your whole life? Definitely natural.

There's only one problem: Nature (and science) beg to disagree.


In reality, male and female animals set up their relationships thousands of different ways in the wild. In many species, males are the primary caretakers of the next generation while females ignore their offspring and mate promiscuously. Even the existence of "male" and "female" as distinct categories is often not so clear in certain species.

Some animals have the ability to change sex to respond to various outside pressures and conditions.

A few can even mate with themselves.

Here are 17 animals that demonstrate the greatness of nature and its stubborn unwillingness to conform to human expectations for the way things "should be."

1. Jacanas

birds, science, nature, incubation

"Mom went out for a pack of cigarettes and never came back."

​Photo by Ozan Kill

Ask any tropical bird out there, and they'll tell you that male jacanas are pretty much the best dads of the bunch. Not only do male jacanas stick around the nest to incubate the eggs and raise their offspring, they even carry them under-wing when they fly.

Meanwhile, female jacanas are ... not exactly super nurturing. After gathering up a harem of nearly half a dozen males and laying her eggs, the female jacana splits in order to fly around, murder the young of rival females, and mate with their former partners.

This is considered charming.

2. Clown fish

species, environment, reefs, fish

Clown fish were invented by Disney/Pixar in 2003.

Photo by Rachel Hisko on Unsplash

Like many species of reef fish, clown fish can, and frequently do, change sex. Unlike most species of reef fish however, all clown fish are born male and are led (in familial groups) by a dominant female.

When she dies, the next-biggest male simply ... becomes female and takes charge of the group.

What you just heard was the sound of a billion other species slapping themselves on the forehead at the same time, wondering why they didn't think of that, realizing it's now too late and that now they'd just be, like, hopping on the trend.

3. African buffalo

leadership, hierarchies, grazing, grasslands

Everyone is getting out there for an afternoon stroll.

Photo by Soerfm/Wikimedia Commons.

Not only are female buffalos are responsible for coordinating the movements of the entire herd — they do it democratically. When it's time to find a new grazing spot, each female takes a turn standing up and gazing in the direction they want to travel, and when they're done, the whole group moves that way.

While status hierarchies exist within herds, the elections are equitable — one cow, one vote.

Change You Can Moo-Lieve in. Make the Grasslands Great Again.

4. Bees

matriarchy, male drones, hive, honey

"Aaaaaaagh! Aaaaaagh! Aaaaaagh!" — Nicholas Cage.

Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

Bees famously take the matriarchy to the extreme. A single queen bee oversees thousands of smaller female workers and male drones.

While most bees live, at most, a few weeks, the queen typically survives several years before the hive goes looking for a new queen to start the cycle over again. All to advance the species-wide goal of refusing to fly out of your car even though all four windows are down.

5. Komodo dragons

komodo dragon, eggs, offspring, evolution

Party out with your tongue out... alone even.

Photo by Mark Dumont/Wikimedia Commons.

Female komodo dragons can lay viable eggs that produce offspring without a male partner, which pretty much explains why komodo dragon Tinder never truly caught on.

6. Praying mantises

copulation, life cycle, insects, hunters

Not as romantic as it looks.

Photo by Oliver Koemmerling/Wikimedia Commons.

Mantis males are often smaller than mantis females, a discrepancy that leaves many males feeling insecure, as it enables females to frequently — though not always — eat their heads during sex.

7. Common reed frogs

amphibians, forrest, frogs, reproduction

So many choices for the day ahead.

Photo by ChriKo/Wikimedia Commons.

These tiny, resilient amphibians can change sex from female to male, allowing them to successfully reproduce if they suddenly find themselves surrounded by frogs of the same sex.

This ability makes them one of the most successful species on Earth at inspiring anxious Sam Neil monologues.

8. South American marmosets

monkeys, jungle, troops, community

"Hey, pa? You ... you wanna ... play catch?"

Photo by Maxim Bilovitskiy/https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/en:Creative_Commons.

Female marmosets tend not to be terribly interested in their babies. A few weeks after giving birth, they're mostly out of their kids' lives forever.

Marmoset dads, on the other hand, are excellent caretakers, feeding, grooming, and transporting their young as well as coaching Marmoset Little League and always batting their kid cleanup.

9. Spotted hyenas

aggression, dominance, African plains, arid climates

Someone has to lead this party.

Photo via Pixabay.

Not only are female hyenas stronger and more aggressive than males, male and female hyena genitals are nearly identical in appearance. They're so similar that it's extremely difficult to tell the difference with the naked eye, which ultimately doomed the '70s game show "What Sex is That Hyena?" to cancellation after just half a season.

10. Seahorses

eggs, mating process, sea life, oceans

"OK, so. I need a really big favor."

Photo by Mikhail Preobrazhenskiy on Unsplash

While males of numerous species nurture their offspring, the male seahorse takes things several steps further. During the mating process, he receives eggs from the female and not only fertilizes them, but carries the offspring until they hatch.

A recent poll of male seahorses found that an overwhelming majority experience a secret surge of satisfaction when their partners get kidney stones.

11. Cuttlefish

coloration, species rivalries, genetics, fish

Blumph.

Photo by Michal B. on Unsplash

Unlike middle school boys across America, male cuttlefish don't have a lot of hang-ups about appearing feminine to their peers. Masters of camouflage, these future delicious fried antipasto will often alter their coloration in order to pass for female around rival males.

If an actual female is around, they'll leave the other half of their body as is, appearing half male and half female.

12. Topi antelopes

Africa, herd animals, promiscuity, food

Oh hey.

Photo by Whit Welles/Wikimedia Commons.

Female topi antelopes are not only sexually promiscuous, but when it's time to mate, they almost always make the first move. In some cases, female topis pester male antelopes for sex so relentlessly that the male has to physically fight them off. (Cue dozens of Facebook commenters yelling at male antelopes for complaining about something that's "obviously awesome" and insisting they're lucky and should "just be grateful for the attention.")

13. Laysan albatrosses

birds, mating, wildlife

"Al." "Al."

Photo by Patte David/U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service/Public Domain Images.

Some female albatrosses mate in female-female pairs, often for life.

(Side note: All male albatrosses are named Al Batross. Every single one of them. That's a proven fact).

14. Banana slugs

slugs, sex organs, horror

"When I think about you..."

Image via Pixabay.

A hermaphroditic species, banana slugs have both male and female sex organs and occasionally mate with themselves.

Though banana slugs do seem to prefer mating with other slugs, doing so typically ends with one slug chewing the other's penis off, because nature is a cavalcade of endless, random horror.

15. Orcas

whales, pods, matriarchal, peers

"You have to hit the home button twice, grandma."

Photo by Mike Doherty on Unsplash

Killer whales live in matriarchal pods, and female whales are more likely to take charge of the group than their male peers.

The oldest female whales are often the go-to source for information about where to find food, and in exchange for keeping the whole family alive, the younger whales patiently show them time and again how to use the iPad.

16. Emperor penguins

documentaries, Antartica, frozen tundra, trekking

"Where is that voice coming from?"

Photo via Pixabay.

Anyone who's seen "March of the Penguins" knows that male emperor penguins guard their eggs tightly, perilously balancing them on their feet while their female companions go off to do traditional woman stuff like trekking across the Antarctic tundra, diving for food in the freezing cold ocean, and pleading with Morgan Freeman to shut the hell up so they can focus on not being eaten by seals for like five goddamn seconds.

17. Bonobos

genetics, sex, apes, animal kingdom

"Mmmmmm. Yeah. Mmmmm. All right. Yeah." — Bonobos, all the time.

Photo by Sean Foster on Unsplash

The female-led bonobos have invented perhaps the most ingenious way of preventing intra-species violence in the entire animal kingdom. Basically, everyone just has sex with everyone else — males with females, females with females, males with males, in pretty much every kind of way imaginable.

The near-constant hetero-homo-orgiastic delight that results pretty much prevents anyone from being mad at anyone ever and unites the species around the common goal of being the best apes ever invented.

We share about 99% of our DNA with bonobos.

Planet

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True

Our love for the ocean runs deep. Does yours? Enter here!

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Here’s how to enter:

  • Go to ocean.org/date and complete the quick form for a chance to win - it’s as easy as that.
  • P.s. If you follow @oceanwise or donate after entering, you’ll get extra entries!

Here are the incredible dates:

1. Staycation + Surf Lesson

Hang ten on the ultimate ocean date! Whether you're beginners or seasoned surfers, a cozy stay by the ocean and surf lessons will have you riding the waves and making unforgettable memories together.


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Peter Dinklage on "Game of Thrones?

When it comes to actors doing accents across the pond, some Americans are known for their great British accents, such as Natalie Portman ("The Other Boleyn Girl"), Robert Downey, Jr. ("Sherlock Homes"), and Meryl Streep ("The Iron Lady").

Some have taken a lot of heat for their cartoonish or just plain weird-sounding British accents, Dick Van Dyke ("Mary Poppins"), Kevin Costner ("Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves") and Keanu Reeves ("Bram Stoker's Dracula").

Some actors, such as Tom Hardy (“The Drop”) and Hugh Laurie (“House”), have American accents so good that people have no idea they are British.

Benedict Townsend, a London-based comedian and host of the “Scroll Deep” podcast, says there is one word that American actors playing characters with a British accent never get right. And no, it’s not the word “Schedule,” which British people pronounce the entire first 3 letters, and Americans boil down to 2. And it’s not “aluminum,” which British and American people seem to pronounce every stinking letter differently.

@benedicttown

The one word American actors aways get wrong when doing an English accent

What word do American actors always get wrong when they do British accents?

“There is one word that is a dead giveaway that an English character in a movie or a TV show is being played by an American. One word that always trips them up. And once you notice it, you can't stop noticing it,” Townsend says. “You would see this lot in ‘Game of Thrones’ and the word that would always trip them up was ‘daughter.’”

Townsend adds that when British people say “daughter,” they pronounce it like the word “door” or “door-tah.” Meanwhile, Americans, even when they are putting on a British accent, say it like “dah-ter.”

“So top tip if you are an actor trying to do an English accent, daughter like a door. Like you're opening a door,” Townsend says.



What word do British actors always get wrong when doing American accents?

Some American commenters returned the favor by sharing the word that British actors never get right when using American accents: “Anything.”

"I can always tell a Brit playing an American by the word anything. An American would say en-ee-thing. Brits say it ena-thing,” Dreaming_of_Gaea wrote. "The dead giveaway for English people playing Americans: ‘Anything.’ Brits always say ‘EH-nuh-thin,’” marliemagill added.

"I can always tell an actor is English playing an American when they say ‘anything.’ English people always say it like ‘enny-thin,’” mkmason wrote.



What is the cot-caught merger?

One commenter noted that the problem goes back to the cot-caught merger, when Americans in the western US and Canadians began to merge different sounds into one. People on the East Coast and in Britain pronounce them as different sounds.

“Depending on where you live, you might be thinking one of two things right now: Of course, ‘cot’ and ‘caught’ sound exactly the same! or There’s no way that ‘cot’ and ‘caught’ sound the same!” Laura McGrath writes at DoYouReadMe. “As a result, although the different spellings remain, the vowel sounds in the words cot/caught, nod/gnawed, stock/stalk are identical for some English speakers and not for others.”

American actors owe Townsend a debt of gratitude for pointing out the one thing that even the best can’t seem to get right. He should also give the commenters a tip of the cap for sharing the big word that British people have trouble with when doing an American accent. Now, if we could just get through to Ewan McGregor and tell him that even though he is fantastic in so many films, his American accent still needs a lot of work.

This article originally appeared last year.

Health

25-year-old U.S. mom is shocked after receiving an astronomical bill from baby's NICU stay

For starters, the hospital charged it cost $4,337 every time they moved the baby's room.

A woman looks at a massive medical bill.

Twenty-five-year-old Janice Hernandez, who goes by @JaniceHeartss on TikTok, has her hands and heart full after her baby, born in late October, was diagnosed with Prader-Willi syndrome (PWS). PWS is a rare genetic condition that leads to physical, mental, and behavioral problems. A key feature of Prader-Willi syndrome is a sense of always being hungry. It also results in poor muscle tone, distinct facial features, and a poor sucking reflex. It can also lead to behavioral problems down the line.

To make things worse for Hernandez, after her baby spent 7 weeks in the NICU, she received a bill in the mail, and it’s the cost of two to three houses in some parts of the United States. “I just got the bill for my daughter's NICU stay,” she said in a video with over 3.5 million views. "Do you guys wanna know how much it is? Do you wanna converse or have a conversation about the price? $738,360 freaking dollars. Almost a million dollars.”

That’s right, $738,360 freaking dollars.

@janiceheartss

Anyone actually pay their medical debt ooooorrrrrrrrr??? #nicumama #nicubaby #nicuwarrior

Hernandez then looked at the itemized bill and found she was charged astronomical amounts for everyday items and services. “For example, I noticed on the bill that there is a little tiny tube of Aquafor that they gave me that I actually still have $25. $25 for a tiny tube of Aquaphor that I thought the nurse was just giving me to be cute and give it for free. No, ma'am, they made sure to charge every single little thing,” Hernandez continued.

In a follow-up video, she shared that it cost $4,337 every time the staff switched her baby’s room. “Imagine if I didn't have insurance," she said according to Daily Mail, I'd have to pay all of this. 'Here in America, just to breathe costs money, and so, of course, when you step foot into a hospital, they start charging you automatically.”

How much money do Americans owe in medical debt?

Hernandez’s piece struck a chord with many Americans who have also received huge medical bills. A 2021 study found that Americans owe at least $220 billion in medical debt. Approximately 14 million people (6% of adults) owe at least $1,000, and 3 million (1% of adults) owe more than $10,000.

"Damn, how long was she in for? Our daughter was in the NICU for three weeks, and ours was $147k," Kristina asked in the comments. "My son died in the NICU after 4.5 months, and our bill was $6 million," Kaori added. "They charged me $2500 a night for the nursery that my baby never even went to. They also didn’t have a nursery," another user wrote.

Many people who live in developed countries where healthcare is free found the three-quarters-of-a-million-dollar bill astonishing. "In Saudi Arabia, all medical bills are covered by the government," one user wrote. "As a Canadian, I genuinely can not understand this," another added. "Genuine question from someone not located in the US: How on Earth do people pay these massive costs? What happens if you need medical care but have no insurance? Do you just not get treated?" Lola K asked.

media1.giphy.com

In another follow-up video, Hernandez shared that she got an update from her insurance company, and her daughter’s stay may not be fully covered. Insurance said it would pay $442,2918.75 of the $739,416.00 bill, leaving her owing $302,741.51. But she hopes that insurance will eventually kick in more. “They don't know if they're gonna be able to cover it yet,” Hernandez said. “It literally says pending or not payable. Charges that are either not covered or need more review by us.”

@janiceheartss

Replying to @Roman BIGGGG update! Guess it’s time for more waiting 🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️#hospitalbill #insurance #nicu #hospital

via Pixabay

One of the most wonderful things about having a dog is how attached they become to their owners. I work from home and my Jack Russel terrier, Scout, lies next to me on his bed for most of the day. The only time he leaves my office is for a sip of water or to go outside and sun his belly on the porch.

That's why whenever I leave the house and can't take Scout with me, I wonder, "Does he miss me? Is he sad that he's alone?" Studies show that our dogs miss us the moment we leave the house and that feeling slowly intensifies until we are gone for about four hours and they have a "plateau of melancholy." That's why the longer you're away, the more excited your dog is when you return home.

The moment I pull up in my car Scout begins to howl like a wolf trying to contact someone who's miles away. It's like, "Dude, I'm 30 feet away. Give me a second to grab the groceries out of the trunk."

Researchers from the Universities of Pisa and Perugia, Italy have found that if you give your dog some affection before you leave the house they'll have less anxiety while you're away.

They conducted experiments with 10 dogs between the ages of one and 11 without attachment issues. The group was composed of seven mixed-breed dogs, one Labrador retriever, one Hovawart, and one Chihuahua.

Participants in the study walked their leashed dogs into a fenced area where they were greeted by a researcher who took their dog's heart rate. In the first test, after the owners walked their dogs into the area, they talked with a researcher for one minute then left without giving the dog any special attention.

In the second test, the dog owners petted the dog during their interaction with the researcher.

In both tests, the owners left the fenced area and hid far enough away so that the dog couldn't smell them.

After the owners left, the dogs looked for them for about three minutes on average. After the owners returned, the researchers measured the dogs' levels of the stress hormone cortisol as well as their heart rates.

The researchers found that whether the dogs were petted or not, their cortisol levels were unchanged. But their heart rate showed a marked decrease if the owners petted them before leaving. Researchers later watched videos of the dogs and found that the ones that were petted showed " behaviors indicative of calmness for a longer period while waiting for the owner's return."

Next time I'm ready to leave the house and Scout follows me to the front door after saying, "Sorry bud, you can't go with me on this trip," I'll kneel down and give him a little extra love and attention.

Maybe that way he won't howl like the house is on fire when I pull up in my car after a trip to the grocery store.

This article originally appeared four years ago.

Unsplash

Conflict between parents and grandparents is hard to avoid. A lot of the time, it comes down to generational differences. When our parents were raising us, there weren't smartphones and there was no Disney+ or Netflix (well, at least not the streaming version). In general, kids had more freedom and less supervision in the 80s and 90s. Parenting styles like gentle parenting or conscious parenting weren't things people thought about as frequently. Again, there was no Instagram shoving it in your face over and over! In some cases, research and data gathered over time have shown us a better way, even though previous generations of parents were doing the best with the information they had.

So it's natural for grandparents to have, um, opinions about how their grandchildren are being raised at times. According to the AARP, most disagreements center on how children are disciplined, what they eat, and how much screen time they get. The sad thing is that when these conflicts become too common, or escalate too far, grandparents can start to miss out on time with their grandkids. There's got to be a way to avoid or mediate these conflicts before they get to that point.

One grandma just laid out her three simple rules for new grandparents who want better relationships with their kids and grandkids.

Giphy

Maria, who goes by MomMom Maria online, took to Instagram to offer the blunt advice for new or expecting grandmas — though they can definitely apply to any grandparent.

Rule number one. You are not the parent.

"That is crucial. You're not this child's parent," Maria says in a selfie-style video filmed in her car. "You're privileged to be a grandmother. You're not the mother."

It sounds obvious, but Maria's absolutely right about this one. The parents get to make the decisions on how their kids are raised, how they are disciplined, what they eat, what they can and can't watch on TV, and more. As a grandparent you're not the decision-maker and you're not the one who's ultimately responsible. You can have your own thoughts and opinions, but you don't really get a say. Harsh but true!

Rule number two: Respect the parents' boundaries.

"And guess what? You don't have to understand them," says Maria. "'I don't understand why she doesn't want us to kiss the baby!' You don't have to understand, respect their boundaries."

Conflict doesn't have to come from disagreements about parenting. Some parents butt heads with grandparents over their kids being spoiled and showered with gifts (and other junk that parents then have to find a place for in crowded houses). It can be tough for grandparents to understand or agree with a boundary like "Please don't buy them anything without asking me first," but Maria argues that grandparents must respect boundaries even if they don't understand or agree with them.

Number three, a corollary to rule number two: It's not about you.

"You're not a victim," Maria says. “You're not a pushover. You're just being respectful of their role as parents and realizing that your role is a grandmother. I love it."

Just because you're keeping critical thoughts and opinions and disagreements on how the children are being parented to yourself doesn't mean you're being weak. That's just being respectful of the parents' boundaries and decisions. It's a good thing that you're working to ensure a positive relationship with your children and grandchildren! That's an investment that will reap more and more dividends as the kids get older.

Maria's tips united people from across the aisle — both parents and grandparents agreed the guidelines could make for better relationships.

Maria's video struck a cord with a huge audience of over 300,000 viewers on Instagram. Most were fully on board with the 'new rules.'

"Grandmother to a 7-month-old and two-week-old. Absolutely agree. And I remember how it was when I was a young mother and my MIL made unsolicited comments," one fellow grandma chimed in.

"And remember things have changed since you were a mom: swaddling, no blankets, back sleeping, etc. Just nod and say ok!" offered another user.

Another user mentioned that she'd had a similar conversation with their therapist, who said: "grandparents are used to being *the* parents in the room. They often times don’t know how to or otherwise refuse to fall into a secondary role.” ... "And that hit hard," the user added. "I think a lot of these grandparents are not understanding that they don’t get to parent our kids. They need to step back and let us parent. It’s time for them to relax and step into that secondary role."

Giphy

But not everyone agreed with Maria's advice. Some grandparents, in particular, resented the fact that they should feel privileged just to be involved in a child's life at all, or they lamented not feeling connected to the family when their wisdom and experience wasn't being valued.

"I had one child. He grew up , got married, and is now a dad. I have one grandson," one person commented. "They live on the other side of the country. I keep my mouth shut about EVERYTHING. I text to get permission to call or be lucky enough to FT. I don’t send my grandson ANYTHING , not even so much as a cookie, unless I get their permission first. I struggle to have any conversation with him or his wife because I am not a part of their life. I keep my mouth shut, offer no opinions on anything . It is very hard to be so disconnected from them and it hurts but there is nothing I can do about."

Another commenter was upset by feeling like they knew better, but not being able to voice it:

"This is so hard to do as a GP. I want all organic. . Parents do not care. I want no sugar. They give lots of sugar . I want no screen time . Parents do lots of screen time . I want no cell phone scrolling. Parents scrolll constantly in front of baby. I’m trying so hard to not say anything."

Parents aren't "always right" when it comes to these conflicts, for the record. Ideally, there would be open and honest communication, and a relationship where grandparents' experience and wisdom was valued and taken into consideration, while also allowing space and boundaries for the parents to make the final decisions. Of course, communication is hard. It takes a lot of work and it requires multiple different parties to manage their emotions and egos. Learning to communicate about boundaries, rules, and differences in philosophy takes time — but Maria's three rules are a pretty good starting point for new grandparents who want to get off on the right foot.

Pets

The biggest fan of Kendrick Lamar's halftime show is a cockatoo, and he is rocking out

Even if you couldn't care less about this Lamar & Drake beef, this is so fun to watch.

NFL/Youtube, @banditthecockatoo/TikTok

Bandit is a Lamar fan through and through.

While there were certainly many folks at home bopping along to Kendrick Lamar’s epic halftime show, no one did it quite like an internet famous white cockatoo named Bandit—who seriously needs to be hired as one of Lamar’s back-up dancers post haste.

In the video below, we get to see the entire journey Bandit takes while listening to the performance— curiosity, intrigue, trying to find the beat, feather-raised excitement as he attempts his own dance moves, followed by full on hand banging, the works!

One thing is abundantly clear. In this infamous feud between Lamar and Drake, Bandit is definitely “Team Lamar.” Watch:

Of course, this spurred a lot of fun comments from viewers, especially folks referencing said feud.

“Even animals are feeling this diss track,” one person wrote, while another said “He’s feeling the power of KDot!” referencing one of Lamar’s earlier stage names.

Another commented, “I was waiting for him to yell MUSSSSSSTARRRRD!” which Lamar himself yelled in the song "TV Off" as a nod to Mustard, his co-producer, which also became a rather famous internet meme.

While Bandit had no actuarial awareness of the diss lyrics Lamar was spitting out, he, like many avians in the parrot family, was responding to the rhythm and beat of the music. Much about how and why these birds react to music remains a bit of a mystery, but they do seem to have their individual preferences. While Bandit clearly enjoys hip hop and rap, another might prefer classical music. One funny thing to note however—it’s been said that on the whole, parrots aren’t electronica fans. So no raves for them.

Of course, cockatoos and parrots can have eclectic tastes too! As we can see below, Bandit also has a soft spot for Billy Idol.

This charming bird has been a TikTok star for years now, entering his 300K followers with dance moves, food antics, and his own beef with “mean ol’ dad,” who has the audacity to touch his stuff. But Upworthy has encountered other cheeky cockatoos before, including one that maniacally chased its family around the house and a feathered anarchist who made headlines after uprooting anti-bird spikes.

All of these stories make sense, considering the cockatoos general penchant for attention seeking, which can lead to erratic and destructive behavior when ignored. But, as we can see, they are also incredibly intelligent, playful, and loyal to boot, making them excellent pets…as well as entertaining content creators, apparently. So bird parents, keep those video comin’.