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If it feels like everyone in public is wearing earbuds—Apple AirPods, specifically—that’s because the behavior is on the rise. In fact, the phenomenon has even been the subject of scientific inquiry, with one study out of the New Jersey School of Architecture examining people’s creation of “private sound environments” in busy urban spaces.

People might choose to listen to calming music, a podcast, upbeat tunes, or even just silence or white noise. But it’s not the content causing debate—it’s the etiquette involved. There’s been no shortage of discourse around the use of AirPods in public, and one of the most hotly discussed places, fittingly enough, is also one of the most common: the grocery store.

Some say wearing earbuds in the grocery store is antisocial

A recent post on X with nearly nine million total views featured a number of strong opinions on both sides.

The original poster claims to have stopped wearing AirPods at the grocery store because “it’s antisocial, doesn’t matter if everyone else is doing it, you have to start with yourself.”

Another user replied that they had also recently quit: “I had the same realization recently. I used to fill every ’empty’ moment with podcasts, grocery shopping, jogging, gaming, even cooking, thinking I was being productive by multitasking. But instead of feeling smarter, my brain felt constantly overloaded with noise and information.”

Others argued that wearing earbuds dramatically decreases social awareness and said people tuned into music or a podcast would frequently stand in their way or otherwise behave rudely due to their inattentiveness.

In another X post, a user called wearing headphones in public a “dystopian tech trend” and worried that things would only get worse with AI-enhanced glasses, more engaging and addictive mobile apps, augmented reality experiences, and more.

Psychology Today chimed in on the topic in 2022 with an article titled “Why Earbuds Are a Threat to Ourselves and Society.” In it, Jim Taylor, PhD, wrote:

“When you are wearing earbuds, you are also sending a signal to others around you that you don’t want to be disturbed. And think about those spontaneous moments in your life when you met someone who became important to you (or you haven’t had those moments because you’re always plugged in). They happened because you were open to the world around you. With earbuds, you are creating a virtual wall that surrounds you and that doesn’t readily allow others into your world.”

Psychologists weigh in

The first generation of AirPods is about 10 years old now. Clinical thinking around their use has evolved quite a bit in that time.

For example, Dr. Shannon Franklin, co-founder and director of clinical training at Element Q Healing Center, says that headphones in public aren’t antisocial—they’re a regulation strategy:

“[It’s] not a rejection of connection. For folks who are neurodivergent, anxious, or highly sensitive to sensory input, a grocery store is genuinely overwhelming. The headphones aren’t saying ‘leave me alone,’ they’re saying ‘I need to manage this environment so I can function in it.’ There’s also just the reality that public space has gotten louder and more stimulating. People are protecting their attention and their nervous system.”

Ilana Grines, a licensed marriage and family therapist at Daily Therapy Dose, agrees and challenges the stigma behind “closing yourself off.”

“The stigma comes from this idea that we’re supposed to be available to strangers at all times and that being polite means staying open to whatever comes at you,” Grines said. “There’s a real difference between being antisocial and being intentional about where you spend your social energy. The person with earbuds in at the grocery store might be saving up that energy for a meaningful conversation with someone they actually care about later. That’s protective, and probably important to their overall wellbeing.”

She calls wearing AirPods in public “the opposite of antisocial” and argues it demonstrates great self-awareness and social awareness.

To take it a step further, women in particular have admitted to wearing earbuds more frequently in public to tune out and protect themselves from harassers and people who might pose a danger to them. Other people use headphones as a tool to help ward off pushy salespeople, volunteers seeking signatures on clipboards, and other contentious social interactions that can heighten anxiety.

AirPods at the grocery store, and in other public spaces, is ultimately a gray area. There’s a fine line between using technology to self-regulate or protect your peace and slipping into a dystopian reality where we’re all too self-involved in our own little tech worlds to notice each other.

The study out of the New Jersey School of Architecture actually found something interesting worth noting. The subjects observed enjoyed busy indoor spaces, like public transit or the grocery store, more when they had earbuds in. But they found far less enjoyment in nature, like public parks, than individuals who didn’t wear headphones.

In other words, there’s a time and a place. It’s polite and respectful to look a cashier in the eye and engage with them human-to-human, not tune them out with headphones. And if you’re outside the grocery store and in the natural world, research has shown you’ll get much more out of the experience if you tune in to the sounds and sights around you.

But it’s not antisocial to realize that you don’t owe anyone your time, and it’s OK if you need a little self-regulation to function in high-stimulation environments. It’s good timing that we finally have the tools to do it—and enjoy some awesome tunes at the same time.