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Tony Robbins mansplained #MeToo to a woman who paid to see him. It didn't end well.

Tony Robbins is an incredibly powerful man. But a video that went viral over the weekend revealed he has a major weakness when it comes to understanding women.

The 6-foot-7 self-help phenom, whose philosophy is based on strength, empowerment, and straight talk, regularly fills stadiums with devotees. But this time, while speaking to another sold-out room in late March, he went a little too far.

"I'm not knocking it," he said, but "if you use the #MeToo movement to try to get significance and certainty by attacking and destroying someone else, you haven't grown an ounce. All you've done is basically use a drug called significance to make yourself feel good."


Fortunately, one woman was brave enough to stand up to Robbins.

"I think you misunderstand the #MeToo movement," Nanine McCool said into the microphone. "Certainly there are people who are using it for their own personal devices, but there are also a significant number of people who are using it not to relive whatever may have happened to them, but to make it safe for the young women. So that they don't have to feel unsafe."

Robbins advanced on her with a fist out and then questioned whether resisting him is helping. He even suggested that he knew "a dozen men" who'd had to opt to hire men over a "more qualified" but "very attractive" woman "because it's too big of a risk."

"I think you do the whole movement a disservice," McCool replied to a torrent of applause.

Days later, McCool still refuses to back down.

In a conversation with Refinery 29 about the viral video published on April 8, McCool stated that as a survivor, she believes Robbins' assertion that anger was hurting the movement was wrong.

"Being sexually abused, harassed, raped, you're entitled to your rage," she told the outlet. "I just think that the #MeToo movement is a platform, a place for discussion and empathy."

Standing up wasn't easy, she said, but as she watched another powerful man display a startling lack of empathy for those who had been silenced, she felt like she had to do something.

"I don’t remember making that decision to stand up but at some point I was like, 'Oh my god, I'm yelling at Tony Robbins. I need to sit down,' but it was too late," McCool told Refinery29.

McCool says it was a painful experience; she could feel Robbins' anger. But she didn't sit down. Because she wasn't just standing up for herself — something #MeToo founder Tarana Burke, who weighed in on the controversy over the weekend, understands all too well.

"We need a complete cultural transformation if we are to eradicate sexual assault in our lifetimes," Burke explained in a statement on the movement's website. "It means we must build our families differently, engage our communities, and confront some of our long-held assumptions about ourselves."

There's a simple reason why Robbins' take on #MeToo is inherently flawed.

#MeToo isn't about attacking. It isn't about destroying. It's about bringing to light the sexual harassment, misconduct, and assault that's been kept under wraps for so long.

The goal is to provide empathy for those who have been harassed and to hold those who have committed these terrible acts (often powerful men) accountable. While the movement may make some men (including, apparently, Tony Robbins) uncomfortable, it's changing the landscape of how our society views and talks about sexual violence.

McCool's bravery should be a catalyst. And this moment is a reminder of how much the movement has yet to do.

In the days following the video's viral spread, McCool has been celebrated, and Robbins has been both vilified and defended. Soon after the video went viral, Robbins issued an apology, stating that he has much more to learn.

But no apology is as important as a commitment to do better. And watching the video, understanding its dynamics, and then vowing to listen to those who are pushing the movement forward is something that we all need to do.

As she told Refinery29, McCool hopes the video itself will be used to train men "who don't get it." She thinks we can all do better.

Because this isn't about punishment — it's about change. It's about listening to and believing survivors. It's about empathizing with those who are finally brave enough to come forward.

McCool just wants us all to keep the discussion going.


We all know that Americans pay more for healthcare than every other country in the world. But how much more?

According an American expatriate who shared the story of his ER visit in a Taiwanese hospital, Americans are being taken to the cleaners when we go to the doctor. We live in a country that claims to be the greatest in the world, but where an emergency trip to the hospital can easily bankrupt someone.

Kevin Bozeat had that fact in mind when he fell ill while living in Taiwan and needed to go to the hospital. He didn't have insurance and he had no idea how much it was going to cost him. He shared the experience in a now-viral Facebook post he called "The Horrors of Socialized Medicine: A first hand experience."

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With permission from Sarah Cooper.

Men and the feels.


Note: This an excerpt is from Sarah Cooper's book, How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men's Feelings.

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One way to do that is to alter your leadership style to account for the fragile male ego.

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Man lists 8 not fun, but very important things you need to start doing as an adult.

"Welcome to being an adult. Maybe you weren't told this by your parents, but this is through my trial and error."

@johnfluenzer/TikTok

8 things you should be doing as an adult. Spoiler alert—none of them are fun.

Who among us hasn’t come into full adulthood wishing they had known certain things that could have made life so so so much easier in the long run? Choices that, if made, ultimately would have been much better for our well-being…not to mention our wallets.

But then again that is all part of growing older and (hopefully) wiser. However there is something to be said about getting advice from those who’ve been there, rather than learning the hard way every single time.

Thankfully, a man who goes by @johnfluenzer on TikTok has a great list of things young people should start doing once they become adults. Are any of his suggestions fun, cool or trendy? Not at all. But they are most definitely accurate. Just ask any 30+-year-olds who wished they had done at least four of these things.
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Her boyfriend asked her to draw a comic about their relationship. Hilarity ensued.

The series combines humor and playful drawings with spot-on depictions of the intense familiarity that long-standing coupledom often brings.

All images by Catana Chetwynd


"It was all his idea."

An offhand suggestion from her boyfriend of two years coupled with her own lifelong love of comic strips like "Calvin and Hobbes" and "Get Fuzzy" gave 22-year-old Catana Chetwynd the push she needed to start drawing an illustrated series about long-term relationships.

Specifically, her own relationship.

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My wife surprised her coworkers when she came out as trans. Then they surprised her.

She was ready for one reaction but was greeted with a beautiful response.

All photos by Amanda Jette, used with permission.

Zoe comes out to her coworkers.


Society, pay attention. This is important.

My wife, Zoe, is transgender. She came out to us — the kids and me — last summer and then slowly spread her beautiful feminine wings with extended family, friends, and neighbors.

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It started with a simple, sincere question from a mother of an 11-year-old boy.

An anonymous mother posted a question to Quora, a website where people can ask questions and other people can answer them. This mother wrote:

How do I tell my wonderful 11 year old son, (in a way that won't tear him down), that the way he has started talking to me (disrespectfully) makes me not want to be around him (I've already told him the bad attitude is unacceptable)?

It's a familiar scenario for those of us who have raised kids into the teen years. Our sweet, snuggly little kids turn into moody middle schoolers seemingly overnight, and sometimes we're left reeling trying to figure out how to handle their sensitive-yet-insensitive selves.


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