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'SAHMs Listen up!': Texas UPS driver has blunt message about entitlement and stay-at-home moms

“I mean, how entitled could you be?”

via J.R. Minton (used with permission)

A Texas UPS driver has a strong opinion on stay-at-home moms.

J.R. Minton, a 33-year-old UPS driver from the Dallas, Texas, area, recently ruffled some feathers with a viral TikTok video titled “SAHMs Listen up!” that begins with him asking, “I mean, how entitled could you be?” At first, Minton appears to fail to appreciate the enormous amount of emotional, mental, and physical labor that stay-at-home moms provide.

“I truly cannot imagine the amount of arrogance you must have to sit there and complain when you are so privileged to have a person who is willing to provide such a carefree life for you,” Minton continues. “Let’s get real! What do you do all day? Your spouse is taking care of everything so you can take care of one thing. How complicated could it be: all you do is go to work?”

At this point, legions of stay-at-home mothers and those who love them considered trucking themselves to Dallas to find this unappreciative UPS driver. However, it was soon apparent that Minton was referring to himself.

@minton__jr

Grow tf up—You should be doing more. #sahm #sahmlife #momlife #mom #momsoftiktok #sahmsoftiktok #sahmtok #momtok


“For 10 hours a day, you get to live the life of a single, childless, carefree man because your wife was willing to take the financial risk of allowing you to be successful in your career while she takes care of everything else,” he continues. “She provides childcare services, home cleaning services, medical services, food services, scheduling services, and a list that goes on and on. And you provide... a paycheck? And you have the nerve to call yourself the provider! What is it going to take for you to realize that, bro, everything you have in your life is because of a stay-at-home mom.”

The commenters on the video breathed sighs of relief and then praised Minton, a father of 4, for publicly appreciating his wife’s work.

sigh of relief, relief, woman sighing, exhaustion, exasperation, joy A woman breathing a sigh of relief. via Canva/Photos

"My sleeves were rolled up, earrings were off, hair tied up.... I was so ready...." one commenter joked. "I thought I landed in enemy territory for a min..." another added. "You have just made me realize after all these years that *I* am the freaking provider and that feels amazing,” a stay-at-home mother wrote.

People appreciate Minton’s post because he praised stay-at-home mothers and placed his wife’s work above his, which he characterized as merely bringing home a paycheck. Minton has one job, delivering packages, but as he noted, his wife is an expert in over five different professions. In a world where stay-at-home moms are fighting to be seen as equals to their working spouses, Minton places them on a pedestal and owes his “carefree life” to them.

"Married life, with children, is bound to be chaotic," Minton told Upworthy. "It’s bound to have its ups and downs; It’s made me question myself a thousand times. However, the marriage my wife and I share has given me the space to find peace."

via Canva/Photos

Minton may be sharing an opinion we don't hear often enough, but he doesn't think he's the only one who thinks that way. "The last thing I am is rare or unique. There’s nothing special about the way that I feel or the things that I say. I have the same thoughts, feelings, frustrations and problems that any other husband or father might be struggling with," he told Upworthy. "The only difference that might be apparent is how I choose to react to the same situations any other man might encounter."

This post isn’t the first time Minton has pulled the bait and switch on his followers. Last year, he made a video where he appeared to take pride in the fact that he never “helps” his wife with chores.


The twist in this video was that he doesn’t “help” his wife with chores because they are also his responsibility. "Because I do what I am supposed to do as a father and a husband. I cook. I clean. I do the laundry. I take care of the kids. I can't help my wife do those things because they are my job, too,” he reveals.

He then urged men to change their perspectives on how they view stay-at-home moms. “Change the way you speak, change the way you think, and grow the f*** up and be a man," he added.

Minton is an equal partner to his wife because he wants to treat his wife and family differently from how he was raised. “Pretty much everything about my parenting style is in spite of what I saw when I was growing up,” he told Today.com. It's wonderful to see someone like Minton breaking the generational cycles. What makes it even better is that he wants to teach others to do the same.

This article originally appeared in January 2025.

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'Marriage only benefits men': Texas UPS driver gets real about why men aren't getting prenups

Who's taking the real risk here?

via Elvert Barnes/Flickr

A UPS driver on his phone.

It’s common to hear about a man who was well off while married but who, after a divorce, is financially struggling and blames his ex-wife and her lawyer for his lot in life. Abby Eckel, a popular content creator who discusses the inequities of domestic labor in relationships, asks why more men don’t get prenuptial agreements.

“Why aren't more men asking for prenups, or why aren't more men asking for postnups if they're under the belief that they will get taken for everything that they have in the event of a divorce?" she asked. “There's a 50% chance that you're gonna get a divorce. Why are you not asking for prenups and post-nups? I genuinely want to know what the reason is if you feel like you have so much to lose in the event of a divorce, why are you not protecting yourself?”

Why aren't men getting prenups?

@abbyeckel

I am genuinely asking. Why dont men ask for a prenuptial agreement before getting married? Lots of men have told me that there is no benefit to them in getting married, and that the risk is far greater in the event of a divorce. That they will be put into financial ruin in the event of a divorce, therefore getting married, simply isn’t worth it for them. So why aren’t more men asking for prenuptial agreements, or even post nuptial agreements, in order to protect themselves from said financial ruin? #divorce #marriage

The video caught the attention of J.R. Minton, a Dallas-area UPS driver and popular TikTok user with four kids and a stay-at-home wife who talks about family life. Minton flipped the script on Eckel’s question by revealing something that many men would have a hard time saying: most men aren’t successful until they get married and have the support of an amazing woman. Therefore, they didn't need a prenup when they got married.

“Men are more likely to be successful if they are married and women are more likely to be successful if they are single,” Minton said, before singing the praises of stay-at-home women.

Stay-at-home moms make a lot of sacrifices

“Whenever a child is born, a woman is typically the person that takes off time to take care of the child, and if there's a stay-at-home parent, most often it's going to be a mom. While some men like to say that that is a privilege for the woman, what it really is is a financial risk that the woman is taking, Minton said. “She is not furthering her career; she is dependent upon another person to be successful so that she can continue to take care of the children she's taking a financial risk for the sake of her family.”

On the other hand, because of the woman’s sacrifice, when she should be in the prime of her career, the man can thrive. He develops connections and skills and gets promotions, while she spends most of her time at home.

stay at home mom, sahm, laundry, upset woman, pile of clothes A stay-at-home mom can't stand the laundry. via Canva/Photos

A lot of the women in the comments loved Minton’s honesty. “This man needs protection at all costs....his honesty is brutal to men,” one woman wrote. “My husband flat out says that he wouldn't have made it as far in his career as he has without me sacrificing what I have to stay home with our kids,” another added.

Minton wasn’t wrong when he said that men experience a much larger boost in income when they become married than women do. That has a lot to do with the pressures of childbearing that overwhelmingly fall on women. That’s probably why 85% of all married people say they've never signed a prenup, but 56% of those who’ve signed one had a previous marriage.

“So how come men don't want a prenup for their marriage?” Minton concludes his response to Eckel’s question. “Most men don't have very much before they get married. They become successful after the marriage.”

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UPS driver's tongue-in-cheek 'homeowner advice' is actually super important

So many homeowners need to hear this.

Photo credit: Canva

Several emergency responders chimed in to agree.

A UPS worker might have been joking when he offered his “best advice ever” for homeowners, but it’s actually something that should be taken seriously.

In a clip posted to his TikTok, the Arkansas-based driver (presumably named Austin), says:

“Listen carefully because it’s going to be the best decision you make when going about this. Whenever you paint your house, whenever you build your house, and you go to buy numbers at Lowe’s or Walmart, or wherever you go to get your numbers, one trick you need to know—you get any color besides the one that your house is.”

@austin_ups

Best kept secret #homeowners #homes #ups #secrets #hacks #goodvibes #energy #fyp

Sure, having hard to read or even completely absent home numbers presents not only a frustrating problem for those who make deliveries, but it can also be detrimental in times of emergencies.

And if you don’t want to take Austin’s word for it, you can trust the several health care professionals and fellow drivers that agreed.

“Can’t believe the number of houses without a number on it AT ALL. Not on the curb, not on the house, not on the mailbox.”

“Delivery driver here. Make sure the numbers are larger than one inch on your mailbox. Especially if you live on a busy street and the speed limit is above 35mph. We can’t see those tiny numbers. Just sayin’.”

“Listen, as a home health nurse, make sure SOMETHING even has numbers we can see.”

“Our numbers are 9” tall. My husband is a paramedic. Ikyky.”

“As a first responder please make your house number visible for emergency services!!!”

“UPS, FedEx, Domino's and other delivery companies should all get together and make a serious but funny commercial about this very real issue.

Back in 2021, an Amazon worker made a similar PSA, warning a home she had delivered to that “my dude…it’s unsafe, honestly,” to not have visible numbers.

@_jesshuseman

We just moved in and this happened today…she’s not wrong though. Guess I need to get some house numbers. #amazondelivery

Generally speaking, high contrast levels (black numbers against a white painted house, for example) work best, as well as having the numbers high enough to see and be visible on the curb.

But Brick & Batten, an exterior design company, has a few other really helpful tips:

The further the house, the larger the numbers

Brick & Batten recommends 3” or larger for houses 0-69 feet away from the street, 4” or larger for houses 70-110 feet, 5” or larger for houses 111-132 feet, 6” or larger for houses 133-160 feet, 8” or larger for houses 161-300 feet, and 8” or larger for houses 301-385 feet, respectively.

Choose long-lasting material

Opt for powder-coated numbers, and pleeeeeeaase replace the old, tired, rusty ones already falling off.

Place numbers somewhere eye level or higher

And in a location free from obstructions like overgrown foliage or seasonal decorations.

Make it visible at night

Place them near a light source, or install one.

Jazz things up with a plaque

Just because they need to stand out, doesn’t mean it has to go against your house design. With a little attention to aesthetics, it can even become a bit of an accent piece.

Making sure house numbers are visible is probably not on the top of anyone’s mind, but it’s little details like this that can really come back to bite us one way or another. So let’s make our lives—and the lives of our delivery drivers—better by following these simple tips.

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Doorbell camera catches a UPS driver in a moment of contagious joy over a simple snack

Her adorable orangutan walk says it all.

@kenistoc/Reddit

Her delight at finding a snack she liked has people in stitches.

In the age of Amazon and other online retailers, delivery drivers have become an integral part of our lives. But most of us rarely interact with the people who drop packages at our door via UPS or FedEx or USPS, and if we do, it's usually only for a few seconds. We might manage a friendly "Good afternoon!" or quick "Thanks a bunch!" as they hustle to and from their vehicle, always rushing to fulfil their quota as efficiently as possible.

Delivery folks work hard. They're on their feet much of the day, traipsing up hundreds of front walks a week, through all kinds of inclement weather. Yes, it's their job and they're paid to do it, but it's always nice to have your work seen and appreciated, which is one reason a video of UPS driver discovering a sweet treat on a customer's front porch is going viral.

Another reason is that it's just hilariously adorable.

A doorbell camera caught a UPS driver wearing a holiday bauble headband walking up to the door and dropping off a package as she talks to herself. After she takes a photo of the delivery, she sees that the customer had left a little tray of drinks and snacks, and her "Oooh, do I see honey bunny?" is a sign of the hilarity to come.

Watch her reaction and the way she joyfully make her way back to the truck.

Unsurprisingly, people are in love with the driver and her giddy goofiness.

"I literally laughed out loud at her crazy walk back to the truck. I need more people like her in my life."

"I have a friend like that, he just makes my day every time we see each other. 😂"

"That is way adorable! Simple act that makes the day of a random person <3."

"I don’t know anything else about her but she’s my new fave human."

"OMG she reminds me of our mail carrier so much. We leave her cookies at Christmas and she always does a little happy dance that day."

Delivery drivers and former delivery drivers shared that these kinds of gestures really do mean a lot.

"As a former delivery driver, i want you to know that if you leave snacks and drinks out for us, we love you to the moon and back. 💜"

"Driving for Amazon paid my rent for 10 months. Not exaggerating when I say that it was a dark time in my life. Snacks made me smile. every. single. time."

"I mean... I literally took something from every house that had stuff out. I worked 10-12hrs+ during the holidays... I needed every calorie I could get walking 20-30miles a day."

"Even when I didn't take them I appreciate them. it's like seeing a sign that says we love delivery drivers."

"I'll tell you what, the people who leave food got me through my holidays as a postal carrier. Nothing slaps harder than an ice cold redbull and bag of pretzels and ice cold bottle of water that was left in a cooler. I had a lady who asked me what I liked and then had sperate bags labeled "Mail carrier USPS" and "UPS GUY" and "FED EX GUY" with our preferred snacks. She asked me what my favorite ice cream was and she knew my mile long loop and knew when I parked, I'd be done in 15mins, so, she'd be waiting at the truck every day all summer with an ice cream and a napkin.

There are some people who just f---ing make the day feel worth it, if you are one of these people, you are what makes delivering mail worth it. We do notice the nice things you do for us, THANK YOU."

"I do this during the summer. I'm in Texas so it's routinely over 100°F. I'm always trying to make sure there are cold drinks for our postal workers and delivery people."

"I do it during Australian Christmas. 40c/100f plus on a December day. Coke water and Gatorade always gone by lunch."

It's a good reminder that it doesn't take a lot to show appreciation and make someone's day. These kinds of positive interactions, even when asynchronous and not directly face-to-face, are an important part of building the kind of world we all want to live in.


This story originally appeared last year.

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