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stereotypes

Mental Health

The danger of high-functioning depression as told by a college student

Overachievers can struggle with mental health issues, too.


I first saw a psychiatrist for my anxiety and depression as a junior in high school.

During her evaluation, she asked about my coursework. I told her that I had a 4.0 GPA and had filled my schedule with pre-AP and AP classes. A puzzled look crossed her face. She asked about my involvement in extracurricular activities. As I rattled off the long list of groups and organizations I was a part of, her frown creased further.

Finally, she set down her pen and looked at me, saying something along the lines of "You seem to be pretty high-functioning, but your anxiety and depression seem pretty severe. Actually, it's teens like you who scare me a lot."


Now I was confused. What was scary about my condition? From the outside, I was functioning like a perfectly "normal" teenager. In fact, I was somewhat of an overachiever.

I was working through my mental illnesses and I was succeeding, so what was the problem?

I left that appointment with a prescription for Lexapro and a question that I would continue to think about for years. The answer didn't hit me all at once.

Instead, it came to me every time I heard a suicide story on the news saying, "By all accounts, they were living the perfect life."

It came to me as I crumbled under pressure over and over again, doing the bare minimum I could to still meet my definition of success.

It came to me as I began to share my story and my illness with others, and I was met with reactions of "I had no idea" and "I never would have known." It's easy to put depression into a box of symptoms.

lighted candles on man's hand lying on the floorPhoto by Fernando @cferdophotography on Unsplash

Even though we're often told that mental illness comes in all shapes and sizes, I think we're still stuck with certain "stock images" of mental health in our heads.

When we see depression and anxiety in adolescents, we see teens struggling to get by in their day-to-day lives. We see grades dropping, and we see involvement replaced by isolation. But it doesn't always look like this.

And when we limit our idea of mental illness, at-risk people slip through the cracks.

We don't see the student with the 4.0 GPA or the student who's active in choir and theater or a member of the National Honor Society or the ambitious teen who takes on leadership roles in a religious youth group.

person holding white printer paperPhoto by Sydney Sims on Unsplash

No matter how many times we are reminded that mental illness doesn't discriminate, we revert back to a narrow idea of how it should manifest, and that is dangerous.

Recognizing this danger is what helped me find the answer to my question.

Watching person after person — myself included — slip under the radar of the "depression detector" made me realize where that fear comes from. My psychiatrist knew the list of symptoms, and she knew I didn't necessarily fit them. She understood it was the reason that, though my struggles with mental illness began at age 12, I didn't come to see her until I was 16.

If we keep allowing our perception of what mental illness looks like to dictate how we go about recognizing and treating it, we will continue to overlook people who don't fit the mold.

We cannot keep forgetting that there are people out there who, though they may not be able to check off every symptom on the list, are heavily and negatively affected by their mental illness. If we forget, we allow their struggle to continue unnoticed, and that is pretty scary.


This article was written by Amanda Leventhal and originally appeared on 06.03.16













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Science

According to science, there is no difference between a "male" brain and a "female" brain

It's a great reminder that gendering activities and behaviors is a bunch of bunk.

Have you ever heard that women are "hardwired" to have better memories? Or that men are "naturally" better at navigating?

Sure, they're just stereotypes, but they're coming from somewhere. And for a long time we've been led to believe that men's and women's brains are fundamentally different, so why couldn't blanket statements like these hold some truth?

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psychology
Joy

Check out a human library, where you borrow people instead of books.

A surely unforgettable experience reaching all corners of the world.

Image via Pixabay.

Libraries no longer store only books.

There are libraries popping up around the world where you can see the books breathe.

You can watch the books blink, cry, laugh, and think. You can ask them any sort of question and get a real answer.

It's what the books hope you'll do.

At the Human Library, the books are people!

It's set up just like a normal library: You check out a "book" on a certain topic and have an allotted amount of time with it. Only at the Human Library, the book is, well, a human.

People who volunteer to become "books" make their experiences open and available, usually on issues that people tend to have a difficult time discussing. "Readers" are encouraged to ask questions freely, and they'll get honest answers in return. It's brilliant.

What kind of books can you borrow there?

1. Borrow a person with autism.

With 1 in 68 kids diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) today, there's no better way to learn about it than by interacting with someone who has it.

2. Borrow someone who has modified their appearance.

Ever make assumptions about people with lots of piercings and tattoos? Here's an opportunity to stop judging a book by its cover and get to know the inside.

3. Borrow a refugee and hear their story.

You've heard about the Syrian refugee crisis in the news. Why not put the media on hold and talk to an actual refugee?

4. Borrow someone who is transgender.

Perhaps you've always had questions about being transgender but didn't know how to ask them. Go ahead. Get your questions ready.

5. Borrow a homeless person.

What stories do they have of a life you may never know?

6. Borrow someone with deaf-blindness.

Just because they communicate differently doesn't mean their stories are less.

7. Borrow someone who is obese.

Society loves to put people in categories. Break through those boundaries to get a fuller picture.

You can borrow a police officer. A veteran with PTSD. A single mom. A Muslim. Someone in a polyamorous relationship. A former gang member. A sex worker. A welfare recipient. A teacher. The list goes on.

The libraries are bringing people who would otherwise never interact together in a way that many communities long for.

That's what Ronni Abergel has sought to do since the library's launch in 2000. During a four-day test run at the Roskilde Festival in Copenhagen, organizers and festival attendees were stunned at the event's impact.

"The policeman sitting there speaking with the graffiti writer. The politician in discussions with the youth activist and the football fan in a deep chat with the feminist. It was a win-win situation and has been ever since," Ronni said on the Human Library's site.

A no-judgment zone is one key to its impact.

"It's meant to be a safe space to ask difficult questions and not to be judged," he told Upworthy. "To try and gain an important insight into the life of someone you think you know something about, but..."

You don't.

In our quick-to-judge, increasingly polarized world, it's no wonder these events are growing in size. We need them.

When asked what has changed since these events started, Ronni responded, “The world has changed, for the worse.”

He points to there being less tolerance, less understanding, and less social cohesion than when he first had the idea back in 2000. And unfortunately, he's right.

When we have states discriminating against transgender people using the bathroom, presidential candidates campaigning to ban an entire religion from entering the United States, and countries still facing stigma around Ebola, it can be hard to want to high-five humanity.

There's so much to learn about one another. A group of readers here borrowed a nudist.

It's time to face our fears and confront our stereotypes. To embrace the diversity of this world will allow us to feel more secure in it.

"When you meet our books, no matter who you are and where you are from or which book you will be reading, in the end, inside every person, the result will say: we are different from each other, we see things differently and we live life differently. But there are more things that we have in common than are keeping us apart." Truth.

If there's one immediately impactful way to bring communities together, a Human Library might just be it.

Learn more about it in the YouTube video below:

This article originally appeared on 02.18.16

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Identity

Hilarious skit illustrates the problem with 'Where are you from?' line of questioning

A simple turn of the tables makes it crystal clear.

Heidi Sadecky/Pixabay

There's no such thing as "a regular American."

There's nothing wrong with asking someone where they're from—in fact, it's a normal conversation starter among a lot of humans around the world. The follow-ups to the initial question, however, can turn problematic quite quickly when there are racial and cultural assumptions, biases and stereotypes underlying the questioning.

Unfortunately, that's all too often the case. Frequently, when the question is asked of non-white people in the U.S., "Where are you from?" leads to "No, where are you really from?" which then leads to an awkward ancestral analysis and an implicit "othering" that the questioner is often oblivious to.

That obliviousness isn't charming or harmless, as a video sketch played out by actors Stella Choe and Scott Beehner shows.

The "What Kind of Asian are You?" video from Ken Tanaka, originally released in 2013, starts with a woman on a trail stretching for a jog. A man comes up to her and starts chatting with her, and at first she seems interested. But then he almost immediately asks her where she's from while also telling her, "Your English is perfect."

She tells him she's from San Diego, but by the look on her face she clearly anticipates what's coming next. And sure enough, what follows is a predictable series of increasingly offensive questions and responses, which the character in the sketch probably just considers "friendly get-to-know-you talk."

But when the woman turns the tables and asks him the same exact series of questions and responds with exaggerated or inaccurate cultural stereotypes, he acts like she's the weird one.

Watch:

People who have been on the receiving end of these kinds of questions and assumptions have shared the video multiple times over the years since it came out, resulting in several waves of virality. And commenters have shared what they love about the video.

"It's the subtle things in this that make it the more awesome," wrote one person. "Like how she amalgamates in Irish stereotypes (Guinness, Top o' the mornin' to ye) with English stereotypes... the same way people like that guy mix Chinese, Japanese, Korean etc. stereotypes together as if those nations were the same thing."

"I'd just like to point out that while a lot of you think this is a parody video and this guy is a characterized, over-the-top version of a person, it's not," wrote another. "This is my life (minus me jogging and being as funny back). And it's not even a compilation of lots of mini experiences all summarized in one video to make even more of a point. In fact, if anything, I think it's missing the part where the man then tells her about how his last 5 girlfriends were all Asian and how he has learned how to make awesome spring rolls, where he starts speaking Korean at her, and then proceeds to ask if she has a boyfriend. Because then, it would be real life."

"This is an actual conversation I've had!!!" shared another. "So funny to see it here, wish I could've had a good comeback for it like this!"

Some people pointed out that the woman said her great-grandmother was from Seoul while the man said his grandparents were from England. That would technically make her more of "a regular American" than he is. (Unless, of course, "regular American" just means white. Ahem.)

Choe and Beehner also had some fun with the comments section, reading aloud some of the affirming as well as some of the more obtuse and/or racist responses to the original video. It's amazing.

You can find more Ken Tanaka videos on YouTube.

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comedy
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