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The Johnny Depp v. Amber Heard trial has spurred vital conversations about toxic relationships

The way we view abuse and addiction is forever changed.

johhny depp amber heard verdict

No amount of fame or fortune can forgive abuse.

Well, ladies and gentlemen … court is no longer in session. The Johnny Depp v. Amber Heard trial is over. The gavel has officially been struck.

The verdict fell largely in favor of Depp, who was technically awarded a total of $15 million (the total amount was lowered based on state lawsuit limits) after the jury voted "yes" to all three of his defamation claims against Heard, which primarily focused on her 2018 Washington Post op-ed alluding to being the victim of domestic violence.

The embattled star, who was not present in court during the final ruling, released a statement saying “I hope that my quest to have the truth be told will have helped others, men or women, who have found themselves in my situation.”

Meanwhile, Amber Heard, who was awarded a comparatively small $2 million for one of her three defamation claims, lamented that the verdict “sets back the idea that violence against women is to be taken seriously.”

The virality of this trial has certainly brought out a lot of toxic behavior online. The countless hot takes and tawdry video reenactments paint a concerning picture of our culture. Monica Lewinsky recently described the trial as a “celebrity circus” in a Vanity Fair op-ed, with the general public being the “guilty” party.

And yet—as with any widespread cultural phenomenon—there have also been positive, socially impactful conversations taking place across social media. Peering past the dizzying, disheartening effects of tabloid overload, our collective understanding of toxic relationships has adapted to be more nuanced and empathetic.


For one thing, it could help empower men to speak out as victims of domestic abuse.

During the trial, a video was played in the courtroom where Heard said, “Tell people it was a fair fight and see what the jury and judge think. Tell the world, Johnny. Tell them, ‘I, Johnny Depp, a man, I’m a victim, too, of domestic violence, and it was a fair fight,’ and see if people believe or side with you.”

Screenshot taken from a live video of the trial.

YouTube

Regardless of who’s right or wrong in this case specifically, that audio recording alludes to the very real obstacles many male victims of domestic abuse face. According to Psychology Today, even asking for help often elicits “gender-stereotyped treatment” which leads to “denial, fear, shame, embarrassment, and stigmatization.” So many don’t report abuse for fear of humiliation.

When an arguably powerful man like Depp takes the stand and tells the world that yes, he is a domestic violence survivor, it can not only encourage other men to share their story, it can help broaden our perspective around what abuse actually looks like. It's definitely not one-size-fits-all.

There’s also the very vital roles that mental health and substance abuse play in a relationship.

Early on, Amber Heard was diagnosed by clinical and forensic psychologist Dr. Shannon Curry with borderline personality disorder (BPD). As with any mental condition, those with BPD can experience extreme challenges in relationships without proper treatment and support. As Healthline states, those with BPD may be affectionate in one moment and suddenly switch emotions without notice. But again, that doesn’t make romantic relationships impossible, nor does it make those with BPD villains. The trial has made BPD an unsavory buzzword, but with more awareness hopefully comes more empathy.

Both Heard and Depp had their fair share of addictions. This can be a particularly dangerous catalyst for violence. Addiction Center reports that 80% of domestic violence crimes are related to drugs and the risk increases when both parties abuse a substance. I think most of us understand that domestic violence and substance abuse are closely linked on an intuitive level.

And then, there’s perhaps the most potentially toxic relationship of all, which the trial illuminated perfectly—that between social media and the public.

The internet is a valuable resource for spreading awareness, having conversations and peer educating ourselves. But without discernment, that resource quickly becomes a black hole threatening to suck away all our compassion into the void. If ever there was a doubt in our mind about just how brazen humanity can be at times, this trial has provided hearty proof. The internet isn’t going anywhere. It’s up to us to use it wisely.

Abuse of all kinds should be taken seriously. No amount of fame or fortune can withstand its damage long-term. The trial may be over, but because of it, we will probably be rethinking our views on abuse for a long time to come. And that, in the very least, is a win for humanity.

Health

4 simple hacks to help you meet your healthy eating goals

Trying to eat healthier? Try these 4 totally doable tricks.

Photo by Anna Pelzer on Unsplash

Most of us want to eat healthier but need some help to make it happen.

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When it comes to choosing what to eat, we live in a uniquely challenging era. Never before have humans known more about nutrition and how to eat for optimal health, and yet we’ve never been more surrounded by distractions and temptations that derail us from making healthy choices.

Some people might be able to decide “I’m going to eat healthier!” and do so without any problem, but those folks are unicorns. Most of us know what we should do, but need a little help making it happen—like some simple hacks, tips and tricks for avoiding pitfalls on the road to healthier eating.

While recognizing that what works for one person may not work for another, here are some helpful habits and approaches that might help you move closer to your healthy eating goals.

man pulling chip out of a chip bagOur mouths loves chips. Our bodies not so much.Photo by Bermix Studio on Unsplash

Goal: Snack on less junk food

Tip: Focus your willpower on the grocery store, not your home

Willpower is a limited commodity for most of us, and it is no match for a bag of potato chips sitting on top of the fridge. It’s just a fact. Channeling your willpower at the grocery store can save you from having to fight that battle at home. If you don’t bring chips into your house in the first place, you’ll find it a lot easier to reach for something healthier.

The key to successful shopping trips is to always go to the store with a specific list and a full stomach—you’ll feel much less tempted to buy the junky snack foods if you’re already satiated. Also, finding healthier alternatives that will still satisfy your cravings for salty or crunchy, or fatty foods helps. Sugar snap peas have a surprisingly satisfying crunch, apples and nut butter hit that sweet-and-salty craving, etc.

slice of cakeYou can eat well without giving up sweets completely.Photo by Caitlyn de Wild on Unsplash

Goal: Eat less sugar

Tip: Instead of “deprive,” think “delay” or “decrease and delight”

Sugar is a tricky one. Some people find it easier to cut out added sugars altogether, but that can create an all-or-nothing mindset that all too often results in “all.” Eating more whole foods and less processed foods can help us cut out a lot of ancillary sugar, but we still live in a world with birthday cakes and dessert courses.

One approach to dessert temptation is to delay instead of deprive. Tell yourself you can have any sweet you want…tomorrow. This mental trick flips the “I’ll just indulge today and start eating healthier tomorrow” idea on its head. It’s a lot easier to resist something you know you can have tomorrow than to say no to something you think you’ll never get to have again.

Another approach when you really want to enjoy a dessert at that moment is to decrease the amount and really truly savor it. Eat each bite slowly, delighting in the full taste and satisfaction of it. As soon as that delight starts to diminish, even a little, stop eating. You’ve gotten what you wanted out of it. You don’t have to finish it. (After all, you can always have more tomorrow!)

colorful fresh food on a plateA naturally colorful meal is a healthy meal.Photo by Anna Pelzer on Unsplash

Goal: Eat healthier meals

Tip: Focus on fresh foods and plan meals ahead of time

Meal planning is easier than ever before. The internet is filled with countless tools—everything from recipes to shopping lists to meal planning apps—and it’s as awesome as it is overwhelming.

Planning ahead takes the guesswork and decision fatigue out of cooking, preventing the inevitable “Let’s just order a pizza.” You can have a repeating 3-week or 4-week menu of your favorite meals so you never have to think about what you’re going to eat, or you can meal plan once a week to try new recipes and keep things fresh.

It might help to designate one day a week to “shop and chop”—getting and prepping the ingredients for the week’s meals so they’re ready to go in your fridge or freezer.

woman holding blueberries in her handsOrganic foods are better for the Earth and for us.Photo by andrew welch on Unsplash

Goal: Eat more organic/humanely raised food

Tip: Utilize the “dirty dozen” and “clean 15” lists to prioritize

Many people choose organic because they want to avoid pesticides and other potentially harmful chemicals. Organic food is also better for the planet, and according to the Mayo Clinic, studies have shown that organic produce is higher in certain nutrients.

Most people don’t buy everything organic, but there are some foods that should take priority over others. Each year, researchers from the Environmental Working Group (EWG) analyze thousands of samples of dozens of fruits and vegetables. From this data, they create a list of the “Dirty Dozen” and “Clean 15” fruits and vegetables, indicating what produce has the most and least pesticide residue. These lists give people a good place to start focusing their transition to more organic foods.

To make organic eating even simpler, you can shop O Organics® at your local Albertsons or Safeway stores. The O Organics brand offers a wide range of affordable USDA-certified organic products in every aisle. If you’re focusing on fresh foods, O Organics produce is always grown without synthetic pesticides, is farmed to conserve biodiversity, and is always non-GMO. All animal-based O Organics products are certified humane as well. Even switching part of your grocery list to organic can make a positive impact on the planet and the people you feed.

Healthy eating habits don’t have to be all or nothing, and they don’t have to be complicated. A few simple mindset changes at home and habit changes at the grocery store can make a big difference.

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