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Here are some simple, but brilliant, April Fools' Day pranks to pull on your friends

Here are 17 of the best responses.

april fools' day, april fools history, pranks

via Marco Verch Professional Photographer

April 1 is April Fools' Day.

Nobody really knows why we celebrate April Fools' Day on the first day of April. Some people believe that it goes back all the way to the Roman Empire when they celebrated Hilaria, a festival of merriment where people dressed up in disguise.

Others say that it began in 1583 in France when the country switched from the Julian calendar to the Gregorian calendar, as called for by the Council of Trent. Folks who were slow on the uptake and didn’t realize that the calendar had moved to January 1 became the butt of jokes and pranks.

Regardless, this is your reminder that on April 1, 2022, you should be prepared to prank some people or at least be aware that it’s April Fools' Day so you can avoid being the victim of someone else’s tomfoolery.

A Reddit user who goes by the name Never--Mind asked the online forum to share their favorite April Fools' Day pranks and they got a ton of great responses. “Since April Fools day is fast approaching, what have been some of your best April Fool pranks?” they asked.

The great thing is that most of them are really easy to pull off. When it comes to pranks, simple is usually best. Simple pranks are harder to detect and easier to accomplish without getting caught.

Here are 17 of the best responses to the r/AskReddit question.

1.

"There are 4 doors to our building and my co-worker put a sign on each one that says 'Door broken use other door' with an arrow pointing left." — Proud Turtle.

2.

"Piece of opaque tape over the laser on everyone's mouse. IT was pretty pissed, I need to take that one to the grave with me." — [deleted]

3.

"I work in Sales, and it seems like we always have a new guy around April. I like to write down on a post-it 'Please follow up with Mr. Baer at...' and then the number for the San Francisco zoo." — mismistu

4.

"Here's mine for this year. I hope it works. I recently purchased an espresso machine that leaves me with little hard pucks of compressed coffee grounds. I intend on covering them in frosting and leaving them on the break room table at work. Muhaha." — FuzzyManPeach

5.

"A greek radio station once said on the news that Greece would quit the euro and go back to their old currency (this was before the whole economy crisis there). The Greek stock market had a crazy and troubled morning until they finally got that it was only an April Fools Joke." — isablaubear

6.

"High school summer, my friend had a habit of getting up at 1 or 2 in the afternoon. I dropped by his place and his mom informed me that he was still sleeping and I should go wake him up. He's a really heavy sleeper so I decided to have a little fun. I moved his cell phone into the center of the floor, about 4 feet from his bed. I crawled under the bed and gave him a call. No response. Called again and I finally heard movement. Hand comes down, can't quite reach the phone. Foot comes down, another foot. He's got the phone sitting down on the edge of the bed.

A very groggy, '..hey, what's up man.. what are you up to?'
I pull off the best freddy kreuger voice I can muster, and yell out, "I'M UNDER THE BED" and grab his ankles with a vice grip. He jumps halfway across the room, nearly faceplants since I have his feet. He kicks my hands away and half scamper/crawls across the room until he realizes what happened. There was lots of swearing, he didn't think it was as funny as I did." — JMace

7.

"I'm a female kindergarten teacher. I wore a mustache all day long and pretended it wasn't there...even with the parents. Everyone got a kick out of it except for one student who cried because 'I looked scary.'" — HotTamalesYum

8.

"One April 1st I got up before my wife. I went to the kitchen to get some water. I opened the curtains to see that our neighbour's house, across the lane, was on fire. I ran to the bedroom and told my wife. She opened one eye and said, "Sure, sure. Ha ha." She got up seconds later when she could hear the fire trucks. Every April 1st, as a joke, I tell her the same thing." — windy496

9.

"It wasn't mine, but it was my mother's. I was six years old and one day she gave my daily cereal, which was cheerios, in milk. But today it was different. The milk was a teal blue, and luckily my six-year-old self seemed to notice. I asked 'Mommy what's wrong with the milk?' She said 'oh nothing a blue cow just made it.' And I was more excited than terrified and ate it all up. I told all the kids at school I ate a blue cow's milk and they were all jealous as fuuuuuck. it wasn't until later I realized it was dyed, and I felt like a fraud for telling all my friends I ate a blue cow." — randomfactgirl

10.

"Last year I posted on Craigslist under the personals section, listing wfm. Googled "selfie" and found some hot girl and used that on the post. Pretended I had just moved to town, and was looking for a good time around town, and someone who knew how to show a girl a good time. I posted my friend Victor's cell number and said the girl's name was Victoria and went by Vic. I specified at the end of the post that 'I'm kinda picky though, so send me a pic if you think you've got the goods, and you may get one back ;)'

Anyway, this was 1 am on 4/1. By 3 am his girlfriend was waking him up saying "someone's blowing up your phone" Vic -"hand it to me." She picks it up, only to see a dick pick that says "hey Vic, here's mine, send me yours." Oh and over 50 more dick shots. By the time he came into work his phone had died twice, and he had over 500 dic pictures sent to him. I deleted the post, told him it was me and we had a good laugh. Still, one of my favorite stories to tell, though I still work with him and I'm scared for this year." — SopwithStrutter

11.

"I replaced a picture of one of my friend's family members with a black and white picture of Boris Johnson." — RugbyTime

12.

"In 3rd grade, the teacher walks into the room with a pissed look. She says the tests from yesterday were horrible and starts telling everyone's super-low grades out loud. She goes on to give us all a piece of paper, saying we are having another test right now. She then proceeds to write the instructions on the board: April's Fool. Super scary moment for me. A girl cried." — Shroomsters

13.

"At the office, fill a bowl with trail mix, but remove all M&M's and replace with Skittles." — cgrant993

14.

"Not necessarily done on April's fool, more like random days throughout the year. One day for uni we went on a bus trip to go check out the cadavers at another uni. Our lecturer was going to meet us down there, so I took this opportunity to buy him a singing Disney Princess birthday card, I got everyone on the bus to sign it and told them all it was his birthday, which of course it wasn't but no one clicked that I was joking, I mean I had been in class with these people for 2 years and if they hadn't figured out I was a smartass, they're not fit and observant enough to be doctors. So I had convinced the class to sing him happy birthday once we got off the bus, which has started a new tradition. Randomly over time with we'd try top that. I once bought him a cake, streamers, banner, hats and party blowers and got my whole year level to barge into one of his classes and sing happy birthday. Everytime he posts a serious post on the Facebook Page for new students, I always post 'happy birthday scott.'" — scottydoeskno

15.

"A few years ago I bought 200 packets of mayonnaise and hid them all over my boyfriend at the time's room. I tucked them in the pockets of all his clothes, in his board games, behind his wall art- anywhere you could think of there was mayonnaise. He was still finding mayo a couple years later." — AimeeSaysGrowl

16.

"When I was fourteen I came inside and found my parents sitting solemn and serious in the living room. They had me sit down and told me that I was adopted. I was devastated to hear such a thing, and my dad told me how my birth parents had to send me to the United States because it was practically the end of the world for them. They couldn't get away, and so i was smuggled into the US and adopted. Now the time had come for me to know the truth, to inherit the items my birth parents had sent with me, to begin my journey to learn who I really was, and to take on my destiny. . . As the last son of Krypton." — [Deleted]

17.

"I told my friend I was pregnant as a prank and he offered to marry me and raise the baby together...it didn't feel like a prank anymore." — TheSilverLinings

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Young creators are finding their voice and platform on Facebook

Photos from Tay Nakamoto

Facebook is no longer just your mom’s favorite place to share embarassing photos.

The social media platform has grown in popularity for young users and creators who enjoy forming connections with like-minded individuals through groups and events.

Many of these users even take things offline, meeting up in person for activities like book clubs, brunch squads, and Facebook IRL events, like the recent one held in New York City, and sharing how they use Facebook for more than just social networking.

“Got to connect with so many people IRL at an incredible Facebook pop up event this past weekend!” creator @Sistersnacking said of the event. So many cool activities like airbrushing, poster making + vision boarding, a Marketplace photo studio, and more.”

Tay Nakamoto, a designer known for her whimsical, colorful creations, attended the event and brought her stunning designs to the public. On Facebook, she typically shares renter-friendly hacks, backyard DIY projects, and more with her audience of 556K. For the IRL event, she created many of the designs on display, including a photobooth area, using only finds from Facebook Marketplace.

“Decorating out of 100% Facebook Marketplace finds was a new challenge but I had so much fun and got it doneeee. This was all for the Facebook IRL event in NYC and I got to meet such amazing people!!” Nakamoto shared on her page.

Also at the event was Katie Burke, the creator of Facebook Group “Not Wasting My Twenties.” Like many other recent grads at the start of the pandemic, she found herself unemployed and feeling lost. So she started the group as a way to connect with her peers, provide support for one anopther, and document the small, everyday joys of life.

The group hosts career panels, created a sister group for book club, and has meetups in cities around the US.

Another young creator making the most of Facebook is Josh Rincon, whose mission is to teach financial literacy to help break generational poverty. He grew his audience from 0 to over 1 million followers in six months, proving a growing desire for educational content from a younger generation on the platform.

He’s passionate about making finance accessible and engaging for everyone, and uses social media to teach concepts that are entertaining yet educational.

No matter your interests, age, or location, Facebook can be a great place to find your people, share your ideas, and even make new friends IRL.

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Researchers dumped tons of coffee waste into a forest. This is what it looks like now.

30 dump truck loads and two years later, the forest looks totally different.

assets.rebelmouse.io

One of the biggest problems with coffee production is that it generates an incredible amount of waste. Once coffee beans are separated from cherries, about 45% of the entire biomass is discarded.

So for every pound of roasted coffee we enjoy, an equivalent amount of coffee pulp is discarded into massive landfills across the globe. That means that approximately 10 million tons of coffee pulp is discarded into the environment every year.

When disposed of improperly, the waste can cause serious damage soil and water sources.

However, a new study published in the British Ecological Society journal Ecological Solutions and Evidence has found that coffee pulp isn't just a nuisance to be discarded. It can have an incredibly positive impact on regrowing deforested areas of the planet.

via British Ecological Society

In 2018, researchers from ETH-Zurich and the University of Hawaii spread 30 dump trucks worth of coffee pulp over a roughly 100' x 130' area of degraded land in Costa Rica. The experiment took place on a former coffee farm that underwent rapid deforestation in the 1950s.

The coffee pulp was spread three-feet thick over the entire area.

Another plot of land near the coffee pulp dump was left alone to act as a control for the experiment.

"The results were dramatic." Dr. Rebecca Cole, lead author of the study, said. "The area treated with a thick layer of coffee pulp turned into a small forest in only two years while the control plot remained dominated by non-native pasture grasses."

In just two years, the area treated with coffee pulp had an 80% canopy cover, compared to just 20% of the control area. So, the coffee-pulp-treated area grew four times more rapidly. Like a jolt of caffeine, it reinvigorated biological activity in the area.

The canopy was also four times taller than that of the control.

The forest experienced a radical, positive change

via British Ecological Society

The coffee-treated area also eliminated an invasive species of grass that took over the land and prevented forest succession. Its elimination allowed for other native species to take over and recolonize the area.

"This case study suggests that agricultural by-products can be used to speed up forest recovery on degraded tropical lands. In situations where processing these by-products incurs a cost to agricultural industries, using them for restoration to meet global reforestation objectives can represent a 'win-win' scenario," Dr. Cole said.

If the results are repeatable it's a win-win for coffee drinkers and the environment.

Researchers believe that coffee treatments can be a cost-effective way to reforest degraded land. They may also work to reverse the effects of climate change by supporting the growth of forests across the globe.

The 2016 Paris Agreement made reforestation an important part of the fight against climate change. The agreement incentivizes developing countries to reduce deforestation and forest degradation, promote forest conservation and sustainable management, and enhance forest carbon stocks in developing countries.

"We hope our study is a jumping off point for other researchers and industries to take a look at how they might make their production more efficient by creating links to the global restoration movement," Dr. Cole said.

This article originally appeared on 03.29.21

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Joy

More than optimism: How to cultivate the world-changing power of hope

Optimism is a mindset. Hope is an action-oriented skill—and one that can be honed.

Photo by Andres Ayrton/Pexels

Hope is a skill.

Hope can be hard to find in tough times, and even when we catch a glimmer of hope, it can be hard to hold onto. And yet, the ability to remain hopeful in the face of hardship and adversity is an example of the human spirit we've seen displayed time and time again.

But what exactly is hope? How does hope differ from optimism, and how can we cultivate more of it in our lives?

Cynics may see hope as naive at best and as blind idealism at worst, but according to Thema Bryant, PhD, former president of the American Psychological Association, hope is really about staying open to the possibilities.

“Hope isn’t a denial of what is, but a belief that the current situation is not all that can be,” Bryant said, according to the APA. You can recognize something’s wrong, but also that it’s not the end of the story.”

People often think of hope and optimism as the same thing, but there are some key differences between them in the social psychology world. Optimism is a state of mind that sees the future through a positive lens and expects that it will be better than the present. Hope, on the other hand, is action-oriented. It involves having a goal for that positive future and making a concrete plan to move toward it.

“We often use the word ‘hope’ in place of wishing, like you hope it rains today or you hope someone’s well,” said Chan Hellman, PhD, a professor of psychology and founding director of University of Oklahoma's Hope Research Center. “But wishing is passive toward a goal, and hope is about taking action toward it.”

That sense of personal agency is the key difference between someone who is optimistic and someone who is hopeful, as the authors of the study, "Great expectations: A meta-analytic examination of optimism and hope," Gene M. Alarcon, Nathan A. Bowling and Steven Khazon wrote:

"Simply put, the optimistic person believes that somehow—either through luck, the actions of others, or one’s own actions—that his or her future will be successful and fulfilling. The hopeful person, on the other hand, believes specifically in his or her own capability for securing a successful and fulfilling future."

Both hope and optimism require a belief in a better future, but hope puts some of the power to make it happen into our own hands. And while hope and optimism are closely linked, they don't necessarily have to go together. As Arthur Brooks has pointed out, a person can be a hopeless optimist, believing in a better future but feeling helpless to do anything to create it, and a person can also be a hopeful pessimist who takes actions to improve things but still sees the future negatively.

Ideally, one would strive toward being an hopeful optimist. Why? Well, for one, both hope and optimism are good for our health, according to studies done on them. And secondly, hope is what motivates us to act. Without hope, we have a whole lot of people wishing for change but not actually doing anything about it.

But how do you become more hopeful if it doesn't come naturally? How do you hone hope?

An article on Psyche by Emily Esfahani Smith shared study findings on how to cultivate hope, which includes:

- Changing the story you tell yourself about adversity, remembering that hard times are temporary

- Focusing on the things you have control over, like your routines, habits and the way you treat other people

- Reframing obstacles as challenges to overcome rather than immovable limitations

- Looking to your past successes instead of your past failures

- Asking yourself what you hope for and then continuing to answer until you find an attainable goal

- Envisioning that goal and mapping out a plan to move towards it

Being hopeful about your own future may feel like a different beast than having hope in humanity's future, but we all have a role to play in creating a better world and hope is the driver strives to make it happen. As Augustine of Hippo allegedly said, "Hope has two beautiful daughters; their names are Anger and Courage. Anger at the way things are, and Courage to see that they do not remain as they are." If we find ourselves angry at the way things are, we need to find the courage to act. The question of what actions to take may remain, but we need the belief and conviction to act that hope provides in order to figure it out.

Most importantly to remember is that hope is a choice. It may not come naturally or easily to everyone, but hope is something we can choose to nurture in ourselves as well as encourage in others.

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Pop Culture

Two brothers Irish stepdancing to Beyoncé's country hit 'Texas Hold 'Em' is pure delight

The Gardiner Brothers and Queen Bey proving that music can unite us all.

Gardiner Brothers/TikTok (with permission)

The Gardiner Brothers stepping in time to Beyoncé's "Texas Hold 'Em."

In early February 2024, Beyoncé rocked the music world by releasing a surprise new album of country tunes. The album, Renaissance: Act II, includes a song called "Texas Hold 'Em," which shot up the country charts—with a few bumps along the way—and landed Queen Bey at the No.1 spot.

As the first Black female artist to have a song hit No. 1 on Billboard's country music charts, Beyoncé once again proved her popularity, versatility and ability to break barriers without missing a beat. In one fell swoop, she got people who had zero interest in country music to give it a second look, forced country music fans to broaden their own ideas about what country music looks like and prompted conversations about bending and blending musical genres and styles.

And she inspired the Gardiner Brothers to add yet another element to the mix—Irish stepdance.

In a TikTok that's been viewed over 17 million times, the Gardiner Brothers don cowboy hats while they step in time to "Texas Hold 'Em," much to the delight of viewers everywhere.

Watch:

@gardinerbrothers
Beyoncé 🤝 Irish dancing #beyonce #countrymusic

Michael and Matthew Gardiner are professional Irish-American stepdancers and choreographers who have gained international fame with their award-winning performances. They've also built a following of millions on social media with videos like this one, where they dance to popular songs, usually in an outdoor environment.

The melding of Irish dance with country music sung by a Black American female artist may seem unlikely, but it could be viewed merely as country music coming back to its roots. After all, country music has its roots in the ballad tradition of the Irish, English and Scottish settlers in the Appalachian region of the U.S. And despite modern country music's struggle to break free from "music for white people" stereotypes, it has roots in African-American traditions as well. For instance, the banjo, which has long been used in bluegrass and country music, was created by enslaved Africans and their descendents during the colonial era, according to The Smithsonian.

People are loving the blending of genres and culture that the TikTok exemplifies.

"Never thought I’d see Irish step dancing while Beyoncé sings country," wrote on commenter. "My life is complete. ♥️"

"So happy Beyoncé dropped this song and exposed my timeline to diversified talent 👏🏽👏🏽," wrote another.

"Beyoncé brought the world together with this song 😭," offered another person.

"Ayeeee Irish Dancing has entered the BeyHive chatroom… WELCOME!! 🔥🔥🔥" exclaimed another.

"I don’t think I can explain how many of my interests are intersecting here," wrote one commenter, reflecting what several others shared as well.

The Beyoncé/Gardiner Brothers combo and the reactions to it are a good reminder that none of us fit into one box of interest or identity. We're all an eclectic mix of tastes and styles, so we can almost always find a way to connect with others over something we enjoy. What better way to be reminded of that fact than through an unexpected mashup that blends the magic of music with the delight of dance? Truly, the arts are a powerful uniting force we should utilize more often.

And for an extra bit of fun, the Gardiner Brothers also shared their bloopers from filming the video. Turns out stepping in the rain isn't as easy as they make it look.

Beyoncé Bloopers #texasholdem #gardinerbrothers

@gardinerbrothers
Beyoncé Bloopers #texasholdem #gardinerbrothers

This article originally appeared on 2.26.24

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Science

'All wrong': Neil deGrasse Tyson totally changes people's understanding of tides in 48 seconds

"The tide doesn't actually come in and out..."

via Neil deGrasse Tyson/Wikimedia Commons and Heinz Klier/Pexels

Neil deGrasse Tyson at Howard University 2010

Astrophysicist and master science communicator Neil deGrasse Tyson is blowing people’s minds by describing how tides actually work, as opposed to how we see them as mere humans.

He recently described the “misunderstood” phenomenon in an episode of “Star Talk” with co-host Chuck Nice.

“Tides are widely misunderstood. The next thing I say may be mind-blowing to you. The tide doesn’t actually come in and out. What happens is there is a bulge of water, two of them, on opposite sides of the Earth,” Tyson began his discussion.

“They are caused by the Sun and the Moon and Earth turns inside that bulge. So when we say [the tides] rise and fall, tidally what is happening is we are rotating into the bulge and then out of the bulge," he continued.

What you think you know about tides is all wrong…www.youtube.com

The quick explanation exposes an even greater scientific idea, that humans are limited in understanding because of our perspective and language. "So we're stuck with language, from our own perspective, rather than the language of what's actually happening,” Tyson explains. “It's simpler to say the water goes in and out. It's simpler to say the sun set rather than, Earth rotated such that our angle of view on this stationary sun fell below our local horizon."

For a more in-depth description of how tides work from “Star Talk,” check out the video below. The famed scientist also wrote a blog post on the tidal forces back in 1995, which describes the phenomenon on an even deeper level.

Neil deGrasse Tyson Explains the Tideswww.youtube.com

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Health

Please read this before you post another RIP on social media

There is a hierarchy of grief and it's important to know where you fall on it before posting about someone's death.

Image from GOOD.

Working through grief is a community thing.

Grieving in the technology age is uncharted territory.

I'll take you back to Saturday, June 9, 2012. At 8:20 a.m., my 36-year-old husband was pronounced dead at a hospital just outside Washington, D.C.

By 9:20 a.m., my cellphone would not stop ringing or text-alerting me long enough for me to make the necessary calls that I needed to make: people like immediate family, primary-care doctors to discuss death certificates and autopsies, funeral homes to discuss picking him up, and so on. Real things, important things, time-sensitive, urgent things.

At 9:47 a.m., while speaking to a police officer (because yes, when your spouse dies, you must be questioned by the police immediately), one call did make it through. I didn't recognize the number. But in those moments, I knew I should break my normal rule and answer all calls. "He's dead??? Oh my God. Who's with you? Are you OK? Why am I reading this on Facebook? Taya, what the heck is going on?"

Facebook? I was confused. I hadn't been on Facebook since the day before, so I certainly hadn't taken the time in the last 90 minutes to peek at the site.

"I'll call you back", I screamed and hung up. I called my best friend and asked her to search for anything someone might have written and to contact them immediately and demand they delete it. I still hadn't spoken to his best friend, or his godsister, or our godchild's parents, or a million other people! Why would someone post it to Facebook SO FAST?

While I can in no way speak for the entire planet, I certainly feel qualified to propose some suggestions — or, dare I say, rules — for social media grieving.

How many RIPs have you seen floating through your social media stream over the last month? Probably a few. Death is a fate that we will each meet at some point. The Information Age has changed the ways in which we live and communicate daily, yet there are still large voids in universally accepted norms.

This next statement is something that is impossible to understand unless you've been through it:

There is a hierarchy of grief.

Yes, a hierarchy. It's something people either don't understand or understand but don't want to think or talk about — yet we must.

There is a hierarchy of grief.

Hierarchy is defined as:

a system or organization in which people or groups are ranked one above the other according to status or authority, and
an arrangement or classification of things according to relative importance or inclusiveness.

What does this mean as it relates to grief? Let me explain. When someone dies — whether suddenly or after a prolonged illness, via natural causes or an unnatural fate, a young person in their prime or an elderly person with more memories behind them than ahead — there is one universal truth : The ripples of people who are affected is vast and, at times, largely unknown to all other parties.

A death is always a gut punch with varying degrees of force and a reminder of our own mortality. Most people are moved to express their love for the deceased by showing their support to the family and friends left behind.

In the days before social media, these expressions came in the form of phone calls, voicemail messages, and floral deliveries.

If you were lucky enough to be in close proximity to the family of the newly deceased, there were visits that came wrapped with hugs and tears, and deliveries of food and beverages to feed all the weary souls.

Insert social media. All of those courtesies still occur, but there is a new layer of grief expression — the online tribute in the form of Facebook posts, Instagram photo collages, and short tweets.

What's the problem with that? Shouldn't people be allowed to express their love, care, concern, support, and prayers for the soul of the recently deceased and for their family?

Yes.

And no.

Why? Because there are no established "rules," and people have adopted their own. This isn't breaking news, and you're not trying to scoop TMZ. Listen, I know you're hurt. Guess what? Me too. I know you're shocked. Guess what? Me too. Your social media is an extension of who you are. I get it. You "need" to express your pain, acknowledge your relationship with the deceased, and pray for the family.

Yes.

However...

Please give us a minute.

We are shocked.

We are heartbroken.

Give the immediate family or circle a little time to handle the immediate and time-sensitive "business" related to death. In the minutes and early hours after someone passes away, social media is most likely the last thing on their minds. And even if it does cross their mind, my earlier statement comes into play here.

There is a hierarchy of grief.

Please pause and consider your role and relationship to the newly deceased. Remember, hierarchy refers to your status and your relative importance to the deceased. I caution you to wait and then wait a little longer before posting anything. This may seem trivial, silly, and not worth talking about, but I promise you it isn't.

If the person is married, let the spouse post first.

If the person is "young" and single, let the partner, parents, or siblings post first.

If the person is "old" and single, let the children post first.

If you can't identify the family/inner circle of the person, you probably shouldn't be posting at all.

Do you get where I'm going with this?

In theory, we should never compare grief levels, cast the grief-stricken survivors into roles, or use words like status and importance. But maybe we need to at this moment (and for the next few weeks and months).

The "RIP" posts started hitting my timeline about an hour after my husband's death, and I certainly didn't start them. This created a sense of confusion, fear, anxiety, panic, dread, and shock for the people who knew me, too. What's wrong? Who are we praying for? Did something happen? Did someone pass? Why are there RIPs on your wall and I can't reach you? Call me please! What's going on?

That's a small sample of messages on my voicemail and text inbox. I had to take a minute in the midst of it all to ask a friend to post a status to my Facebook page on my behalf.

Your love and expressions of support are appreciated and needed, but they can also be ill-timed and create unintended additional stress.

The person is no less dead and your sympathy no less heartfelt if your post, photo, or tweet is delayed by a few hours. Honestly, the first couple of hours are shocking, and many things are a blur. Most bereaved people will be able to truly appreciate your love, concern, prayers, and gestures after the first 24 hours.

I've learned this from the inside — twice within the last four years. And I assure you that if we each adopted a little patience and restraint in this area, we would help those who are in the darkest hours of their lives by not adding an unnecessary layer of stress.

A few extra hours could make all the difference.

This article originally appeared on 05.07.19

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