+
upworthy
Health

Woman's explanation for being 'standoffish to men in public' brings up an important point about unwanted attention

This is why talking about women's experiences is so important.

Woman's explanation for being 'standoffish to men in public' brings up an important point about unwanted attention

When Lily Evans set out to walk her dog, she had no idea the story of that walk would later go viral on the internet.

When she took to Twitter to recount her experience, she opened with a simple question, one that many men have probably wondered for a long time — though women already know the answer.

(Before you click through to the thread itself, note that Lily's Twitter account is expressly for adults and may be NSFW.)



All Twitter images from Lily Evans/Twitter, used with permission. A transcript of the excerpted tweets is available at the end of the story.

assets.rebelmouse.io

The walk started off normal enough. Until she ran into a seemingly friendly stranger.

A man eating on a nearby bench offered her dog, Echo, a treat.

assets.rebelmouse.io

He eventually asked her if she lived in the area — which could be considered slightly intrusive — but all in all, it was just small talk.

But then she ran into him again shortly after.

assets.rebelmouse.io

Evans says his friendly banter — maybe innocent, but more likely not — was making her incredibly uncomfortable.

And yet he continued to linger.

assets.rebelmouse.io

Then he invaded her physical space with an out-of-nowhere hug.

"I was terrified," she wrote.

assets.rebelmouse.io

Evans hurried home, petrified the man would follow her.

He didn't. But the experience left her shaken and upset. Worst of all, she says, she has been through this many, many times before.

Her story went viral in a hurry, with over 44,000 retweets, 68,000 likes, and thousands of comments.

"The response from other women has been pretty heartbreaking," Evans writes in a Twitter exchange with Upworthy. "Many, many women have used this as an opportunity to share their stories of harassment, assault, or even just being very frightened."

The replies to Evans' tweet thread is littered with similar stories — seemingly "nice" guys on the street or public transportation who push small talk far past its acceptable boundaries.

Though she's glad her story made other women feel more comfortable coming forward with their own experiences, Evans hopes it also leaves an impression on men who read it.

"I had several guys ask me how they can be more non-threatening, and that's exactly what I was aiming for."

"I got a lot of replies from men saying, 'Oh, I'm so sorry that happened, but we aren't all like that! Some of us are nice guys,'" she says. "And while that's true, my point was that strangers cannot know what your intentions are until it's too late.


She hits on an important point: It's not inherently wrong or creepy to strike up a conversation with a stranger, but women truly never know when a simple "hi" is going to turn into them being followed and harassed.

"I had several guys ask me how they can be more non-threatening, and that's exactly what I was aiming for," she says. "I just want men to be more self-aware and understand that when a woman they don't know is skittish, it's nothing personal. We're just trying to be safe."


This article originally appeared on 07.18.19





Florida teacher Yolanda Turner engaged 8th grade students in a dance-off.

We've said it before and we'll say it again: Teachers deserve all the kudos, high fives, raises, accolades, prizes and thanks for everything they do. Even if they just stuck to academics alone, they'd be worth far more than they get, but so many teachers go above and beyond to teach the whole child, from balancing equations to building character qualities.

One way dedicated educators do that is by developing relationships and building rapport with their students. And one surefire way to build rapport is to dance with them.

A viral video shared by an assistant principal at Sumner High School & Academy in Riverview, Florida shows a group of students gathered around one student as he challenges a teacher to a dance-off.

Keep ReadingShow less
Pop Culture

Jon Stewart returns to the 'Daily show' and doesn't miss a beat

In his first episode back as host, Stewart didn't mince words listing off the ways Biden and Trump were "similarly challenged."

Montclair Film Festival/Wikipedia, Paramount/Wikipedia

Jon Stewart returns as host of "The Daily Show"

After a nine year hiatus, Jon Stewart has returned as host of “The Daily Show.” And it’s a comeback so seamless, it’s as though he never truly left.

The GOAT of late night satire has a reputation for pointed humor, informed commentary and genuine enthusiasm for the topics he covers (not to mention his relentless interviewing skills) and Monday’s show had all these elements we’ve come to expect.

Wasting no time, Stewart dove right into one of his brutal but balanced assessments—this one of both President Joe Biden and Donald Trump.

Keep ReadingShow less

Fowl Language by Brian Gordon


Brian Gordon is a cartoonist. He's also a dad, which means he's got plenty of inspiration for the parenting comics he creates for his website, Fowl Language (not all of which actually feature profanity).

He covers many topics, but it's his hilarious parenting comics that are resonating with parents everywhere.

"My comics are largely autobiographical," Gordon tells me. "I've got two kids who are 4 and 7, and often, what I'm writing happened as recently as that very same day."

Keep ReadingShow less
Joy

A homeless man asked a college student for some tea, and a deluge of kindness followed

The unlikely pair spent the day getting to know each other, and now thousands of strangers are invested in Unc's well-being.

Neither Sanai Graden nor her "Unc" knew what their meeting in a parking lot would lead to.

Every once in a while, a story of two strangers turns into a shared connection that touches millions. This is one of them.

Sanai Graden is a 21-year-old college student living in Washington, D.C., who likes to vlog on TikTok while she does everyday things. As she was heading to the grocery store on a random day at the end of January 2024, she turned on her camera, and soon after, a man approached and asked her if she could help him get some hot tea.

Not money. Not even food. Just some simple, hot tea.

Graden told the man she was going to Trader Joe's and he could go along with her and they could stop at Starbucks. As they walked and chatted, Graden learned the man was homeless, had no family and was suffering from prostate cancer. He has just gotten insurance, but it wouldn't kick in for 45 days and he needed a prescription filled.

Keep ReadingShow less
Joy

Cookie company offers cheeky break-up boxes just in time for Valentine's Day

It's the sweetest send-off soon to-be exes could ask for.

@insomniacookies/Instagram

Who wouldn't wanna be broken up with this way?

Love is in the air for some…but not everyone.

Ultra popular cookie delivery company Insomnia Cookies recently announced a special box guaranteed to add a dash of sweetness to any Valentine’s Day breakup.

Along with a customized assortment of 12 delicious cookies, customers can choose between four cheeky break-up messages:

“It’s not me, it’s you.”

“You’re sweet, but not my flavor.”

“I have the hots for your roommate”

“We’re done. Have a nice life.”

Keep ReadingShow less
Pop Culture

A stadium of people launched into an incredible, spontaneous 'Bohemian Rhapsody' sing-along

"For almost 6 minutes, the equivalent of a small city sang, with one voice, the beautiful song of a man who has been dead for decades. If you can do this, you're not just a famous person, you're a legend."

When polarization starts to feel like a defining characteristic of humanity, sometimes we need a reminder that people really are capable of coming together as one.

Watching a stadium full of Green Day concertgoers bust out their best "Bohemian Rhapsody" when it came over the loudspeakers is just such a reminder.

As the person who uploaded the concert footage to Reddit noted: "For almost 6 minutes, the equivalent of a small city sang, with one voice, the beautiful song of a man who has been dead for decades. If you can do this, you're not just a famous person, you're a legend."

Keep ReadingShow less