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17 small, but significant, lifestyle changes that help people with anxiety.

17 small, but significant, lifestyle changes that help people with anxiety.

While it’s easy — and understandable — to roll your eyes when someone offers a “miracle cure” for your anxiety (Yes! I have tried yoga! Thanks for asking!!), it’s also important to acknowledge this truth: There are day-to-day changes you can make that might help you manage your anxiety.

We’re not talking about a miracle cure. We’re not saying breathing on a mat will make your problems go away. It’s just important to remember while you’re rolling your eyes that you’re not helpless in this fight.

While something that worked for one person might not work for you, that doesn’t mean nothing works for you — or that daily, destructive anxiety is inevitable.


Of course, that being said, anxiety will still happen, and when it rears its ugly head, it’s not your fault. It doesn’t mean you didn’t “try hard enough.” But for some of us, a slight change or tweak in our routine can at least make the fall a little softer, and the anxiety a bit more manageable.

Making small changes also doesn’t replace seeing a therapist or taking medication, if that’s what you need. It’s just important to know there are options out there.

To find out some small changes people made that made a significant difference in their life with anxiety, our partners at The Mighty reached out to their mental health community.

Here’s what they shared:

1. Making Your Bed Every Morning

“I make my bed in the morning. That way I start my day feeling like I’ve already accomplished something. Also, no matter how bad the day is, I have something nice to come home to.” — Clarissa L.

via Henrik Nyh / Flickr

2. Keeping Your Phone on Silent

“I keep my phone on silent. I never realized how much anxiety came from sudden phone calls or texts I wasn’t expecting. It doesn’t help that 9/10 times it’s a text that causes me more anxiety/drama/stress.” — Kathryn W

3. Opening Up to Others About Your Anxiety

“Being really open and honest with everyone that I have severe anxiety. When it’s really bad, I’m more open about it rather than hiding. I also draw a little smiley face on my wrist every day and make myself think a happy thought each time I see it!” — Cherokee M.

“Nightly check ins with my boyfriend. It helps to discuss the day and talk about what’s bothering me and the positive and negative things that happened. Helps set me up for sleep. Thank goodness he’s understanding and so patient with me when my anxiety becomes overwhelming for me.” — Monica T.

“I’ve informed people of my anxiety and have told them I need to leave the area for a reason and to please don’t take it personally, and please give me my space.” — Bailey S.

4. Spending Less Time on Social Media/Limiting Screen Time

“Temporary Facebook breaks by uninstalling the app. I can still browse through the mobile site, but it’s more inconvenient and makes me less likely to spend hours on there.” — Randi D.

“I limit my social media. It seemed my anxiety would rise every time I went on, because I was comparing my life to everyone’s highlight reel and it was doing a number on my self-esteem.” — Jen S.

“I try my best not to reach for my phone first thing in the morning. It’s not easy when it’s the alarm going off, but I turn it off and then I reach for my dogs. I try to spend a few minutes cuddling with them before I do anything else, like check my emails or Facebook. Before reality gets a chance to get in, I give my girls a chance to get their love in. They are far more important and loving them sets a better tone for my day.” — Nicole R.

“Having complete days where I switch off. No phone, internet or leaving the house. Ultimate recharge, in my place of security and serenity, without distractions.” — Capri B.

5. Saying “No”

“Being honest and telling people no. Saying ‘maybe’ doesn’t help… I’m telling you no for a reason, respect that and don’t come back at me for it. I’m trying my best, but I have my limits on what I can do. If I can do it I will do it.” — Saige D.

via Henry Burrows / Flickr

6. Using Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Techniques (a.k.a. Jedi Mind Tricks)

“I basically do a Jedi mind trick on myself. (Being a nerd helps with my anxiety too lol.) Here’s how it works: I try to objectively reflect on and assess my day. For example, I’ll think about what happened that day and rate how good the day was. However, I have to be able to provide ‘evidence’ from the day to back up my rating. Since anxiety convinces me I had a crappy day, when I make my day concrete by reflecting on the specific goals I did meet and the specific things I did accomplish and the specific little surprises that were positive, I see it was actually a good day. My attitude towards the day improves. It’s cut down on how often I claim I had a crappy day. I can tell if it was just the anxiety or actually a crappy day. If it was just the anxiety, reflecting has helped me see anxiety was lying and my memory of the day becomes positive. I guess it’s a type of daily gratitude practice. I even have an app that I can use to track how I rated my days so I can see patterns and I can visually see that I actually have more good days than bad ones.” — Jessica R.

7. Starting a Mindfulness Practice

“Yoga and meditation! Mindfulness is really helpful, it helps you stay in the present moment. also focusing on my breathing, deep breaths. They help me stay grounded.” — Eirenne E.

“Gratitude and mindfulness have worked really well and after being repeatedly told in therapy this works, I hesitantly tried it out. And it does work. Anxiety is often so future-focused about what may or may not happen. Mindfulness and gratitude keep you in the moment and help you appreciate what you already have. For example, every morning on my way to work, I have a gratitude mindfulness exercise. I notice the sunrise and appreciate it beauty, different colors, textures, etc. In that moment, I am not worried about work that day or remembering something that didn’t go well the day before. It is just me and the sunrise.” — Alyssa P.

“I’ve taken up meditation. I decided to download a few guided meditation sessions and I now meditate twice a day. My first is a general session in the morning, and at night it’s a session about whatever bothered me throughout the day. It helps a lot.” — Brianna N.

via Sebastien Wiertz / Flickr

8. Writing Down Your Schedule/To-Do List

“I have a daily planner, but I also use a chalkboard wall, sticky notes and an app on my phone to make reminders and notes of encouragement more visible. It’s one of the best things I’ve done to cope with both anxiety and ADHD.” — Kami L.

9. Working Out

“The gym. Mostly on the treadmill or the bikes. Simple but slow workouts. I do it early in the a.m. If I start having an episode, walking or running in place helps.” — Jordan S.

10. Practicing Acceptance

“Accepting this as part of who I am. It allows me to step back when needed, totally guilt-free. Also letting go of how it makes others feel, guilt-free. It doesn’t change the level of anxiety, it only takes away the guilt of having it.” — Kathi F.

11. Cutting Toxic People/Things Out of Your Life

“I dropped all the toxic people in my life. Block. Delete. So simple. I unfollowed all the news and political pages on Twitter and Facebook. Life is so much better being a little selfish and putting my needs first. You can’t pour from an empty cup. As bitchy and heartless as I may sound, I’m actually able to love and care for those who actually care about me better after getting rid of the draining relationships.” — Naoko P.

“Cutting out people who are negative and bring me down not just on social media but I’ve had to tell former friends I’m done. It was hard when there was still so much there, but the constant disappointment was not worth it.”– Allison M.

“I remove all toxic people from my life. And I try to avoid encounters with people like that as often as I can. The biggest change I’ve made is breaking up with the most toxic ex-boyfriend I’ve ever had and getting out of the most toxic relationship I have ever been in. Reminding myself to breathe every day is extremely important. Relax. And to remember that things take time.” — Jessa P.

12. Establishing a Bedtime Routine

“I’ve established a bedtime routine. May sound silly, but after brushing teeth, etc., I wash my hands with a lavender soap. And use a good smell on my hands. Then climb into bed and take a few deep breaths. While repeating my mantra, ‘You are physically, mentally, emotionally safe. The world is not out to get you. Nothing is as bad as it seems.’ It really helps me.” — Niki T.

“I get everything I need for the day ready the night before so I don’t have to think too early in the morning. I also make my bed before I leave in the morning which is great because coming home after a long day to a made bed is fantastic. My room stays neat and clean which helps keep my mind at ease.” — Alexis H.

“I write down all the things I need to do the next day before I go to bed. It helps me fall asleep because I’m less worried about forgetting a responsibility.” — Maisie B.

via Sam Javanrough / Flickr

13. Journaling

“I keep a journal now to track what was happening when I began to feel myself getting overwhelmed. Inside the cover is a list of grounding techniques. This helps me track my triggers and find ways to cope/avoid those situations.” — Megan K.

14. Finding Something to Do With Your Hands

“I take my crochet with me everywhere I go now. It helps me while I sit and talk to people. Even if I’m not talking to someone, it can help bring a great conversation starter and helps ease my tension, as I keep my hands busy.” — Tatauq M.

15. Cutting Out Caffeine

“I’ve cut the majority of caffeine from my life. I stick to herbal tea, and occasionally will have a green tea or decaf coffee. Since this change, I’ve had significantly fewer panic attacks.” — Ashley S.

“Cut out caffeine and drink more water. I was told by a therapist that it would help and it does. I noticed without the caffeine I don’t feel as anxious. Not only does it help with my anxiety, but I know I’m hydrated.” — Amanda W.

“I quit caffeine! Not having that extra jolt when I get anxious has really helped keep my panic levels lower. Yes, it was hard — but worth it!” — Polly B.

16. Giving Yourself Time in the Morning to Prepare for the Day

“Giving myself enough time in the morning to prepare for the day. It has made a huge difference in being able to have the right mindset before leaving the house.” — Stephanie Q.

“I wake up an hour earlier to get some alone and free time in my home before everyone else wakes up.” — Alicia H.

17. Practicing Gratitude

“Listing three things I’m thankful for every day (no repeats, if I’m thankful for the sun one day then I can’t say that ever again) and going on a walk.” — Crystal G.

“When I think something negative, I have to stop and think of something I am grateful for. Example — I got a flat tire and I would’ve normally been upset, but I remembered I had the foresight to get AAA two years ago because I was scared about something happening. I said thank you to my anxiety because now I was covered. Sounds weird but it works.” — Karri H.

This article was originally published by our partners at The Mighty and was written by Sarah Schuster.

Russian novelist Leo Tolstoy.

Leo Tolstoy was a Russian novelist known for epic works such as War and Peace and Anna Karenina. His life experiences—from witnessing war to spiritual quests—profoundly influenced his writings and gave him profound insights into the human soul. His understanding of emotions, motivations and moral dilemmas has made his work stand the test of time, and it still resonates with people today.

Julian de Medeiros, a TikToker who shares his thoughts on philosophy, recently shared how Tolstoy knew if someone was highly intelligent—and his observation says something extraordinary about humanity.

intelligence, thinking, thought process, humanity, humansAn intelligent man's thought process.Canva Photos

“The more intelligent a person is, the more he discovers kindness in others,” Tolstoy once wrote. “For nothing enriches the world more than kindness. It makes mysterious things clear, difficult things easy, and dull things cheerful.”

@julianphilosophy

Intelligent people are kind #intelligent #intelligence #kindness #smart #tolstoy #men #women


De Medeiros boiled down Tolstoy’s thoughts into a simple statement: “Intelligent people are unafraid to be kind.” He then took things a step further by noting that Tolstoy believed in the power of emotional intelligence. "To have emotional intelligence is to see the good in other people, that is what Tolstoy meant, that to be intelligent is to be kind," he added.

It seems that, according to de Medeiros, Tolstoy understood that intelligent people are kind and perceptive of the kindness in others. The intelligent person is conscious of the kindness within themselves and in the world around them.

In a 2024 opinion piece for Inc., author and speaker Jeff Hayden cites organizational psychologist Adam Grant, who says, "Generosity isn't just a sign of virtue. It's also a mark of intelligence. Data: people with high IQs have more unselfish values, give more to charity, and negotiate better deals for others. They prioritize the long-term collective good over short-term self-interest. It's smarter to be a giver than a taker."

Hayden adds on to this statement, saying, "...You can also be smart enough to be generous, thoughtful, and kind. You can be smart enough to build people up instead of tearing them down. You can be smart enough to give before you receive (or better yet, with no expectation of reciprocation.) You can be smart enough to shift the credit from yourself to others."

kindness, intelligence, humanity, human condition, be kindKids showing kindness through sharing. Canva Photos

In other words, these findings certainly line up with what Tolstoy's take on the correlation between kindness and intelligence.

Through Tolstoy's musings, de Medeiros (and Hayden and Grant) makes a point that is often overlooked when people talk about intelligence: truly smart people are as in touch with their hearts as they are with their minds.

This article originally appeared two years ago. It has been updated.

Kids

5-year-old getting blood drawn psyches himself up through tears with the best pep talk

"Heck yeah!" This little cancer warrior is helping everyone who hates needles find courage.

Screenshots courtesy of @morganprains/TikTok

Reece has become a viral hero for how he handles his biweekly blood draws.

Very few people enjoy being poked with needles, and a good percentage of the adult population is actively afraid of it. So it's no surprise when young kids cry when it's time for a shot or when they have to get their blood taken. Who can blame them? It sucks.

For Morgan Handley's son, Reece, that discomfort is not just a once-a-year ordeal, but a biweekly one. The five-year-old was diagnosed with leukemia three years ago and has to get his blood drawn regularly. The way he psyches himself up for it—despite clearly being upset by it—has people cheering him on and inspired to take the same approach to hard things they don't want to do.

Watch:


@morganprains

Just my 5 year olds version of a pep talk for his lab draw this week…. He’s had his labs done at least bi weekly for almost 3 years 🥹🤣 #fyp #childhoodcancerawareness #roarlikeReece #fcancer

His "Heck yeah! Do it. Just do it." would be enough on its own, but the enthusiastic "Yeah, boy! That's what I'm talkin' about!" is such a flex. The little warrior clearly knows what works for him, and his courage through his tears is exactly what we all wish we could muster when we're going through something hard.

Handley tells Upworthy that it's something he's internalized from the family. "We pep him up, always, but it’s carried over over the years," she says. "And now he just naturally does it, even to us when we have things that have to get done!"

People loved how he handled it:

"Him crying while cheering himself on broke my heart and made me laugh at the same time."

"He figured out it's mind over matter!"

"He handled that better than some grown men I know! Hahah"

blood draw, needles, fear of needles, trypanophobia, getting blood takenMany grown men don't handle getting their blood taken very well.Photo credit: Canva

"I don't even have kids and I want to get him whatever toys he wants after this."

"Look at that brave little guy! He pep talked himself through the anxiety and pain!!"

Handley shared that Reece is set to ring the bell—declaring that he's cancer-free—in July of 2025. It's been a long road to get there. He was diagnosed with leukemia in September of 2022 after going to the ER for fever blisters that had turned into a rash around his mouth and what seemed like an allergic reaction. Noticing Reece looked pale, the ER doctor took his blood and found a white cell count of 80,000, which was an indication of leukemia. After being transferred to the children's hospital, doctors rechecked his blood cell count and confirmed it.

That's where the family's cancer journey began, meeting with doctors, coming up with a plan, and starting treatment. Thankfully, he was able to start immunotherapy treatment as part of a St. Jude's trial, which has been shown to reduce relapse rates. Immunotherapy treatment is now part of standard protocol, says Handley.

"Treatment has been decently smooth," she tells Upworthy. "He has sensitive skin so lots of rashes to every medicine ever. Steroids do a number on kids. In the beginning he stopped walking, but he overall hasn’t had terrible reactions. Immunotherapy was a smooth part of treatment."

@morganprains

Replying to @Hannah Fountain sorry it’s so long 😆 #fcancer #childhoodcancerawareness #diagnosis

Reece's specific form of leukemia is acute lymphocytic (or lymphoblastic) leukemia (ALL), a cancer of the bone marrow and blood that progresses rapidly and creates immature blood cells rather than mature ones. It's the most common form of childhood cancer, according to the Mayo Clinic. Thankfully, it's now more treatable than many other forms of cancer, with a high survival rate, especially for those diagnosed as young children.

Handley shared another video that illustrates how much of a day-by-day process it is go to through cancer treatment as a child. She said how Reece deals with blood draws "depends on the day."

@morganprains

Replying to @Morgan Handley truly an inspiration. I’m so proud of this kid. He is a literal hero. The unfortunate reality is needle pokes are a frequent occurrence in cancer treatment. Most days he just makes the best of it 🥹🤪❤️‍🩹 #childhoodcancerawareness #roarlikeReece

People in the comments have been encouraging and some have even shared their own stories with childhood leukemia, offering hope to Handley and her family.

"My brother was also diagnosed with leukemia at 2 - remission at 5. I was born right after he was diagnosed. So much similarity. He’s been cancer free for 35 years…praying for y’all!"

"My sister was diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia at age 2 as well and beat it by the age of 6. It stunted her growth significantly but other than that she’s 25 and thriving!!"

"I had a hemoglobin of 4 the day I was diagnosed with ALL at 6 years old. Very pale, very weak. Biggest clue was I couldn’t keep up in PE & my mom had a gut feeling. I’ve been cancer free for almost 28 years now. I also became a nurse because of this experience. Much love to you all."

"My oldest boy was 3 when he was diagnosed with stage 3 Clear Cell Sarcoma. He is now cancer free and 8 years old. We had another boy and expecting our little girl in October. I pray your little boy a long healthy life he deserves."

However, an increase in positive outcomes doesn't make treatment any more enjoyable or the process any easier for a parent.

"I want people to know how hard it is to watch you kid lose himself and struggle with simple kid things because you’re trying to save his life," says Handley. "I want people to know that the reality is living in fear of death for your child. Everyday. Relapse, everyday. But celebrating every single good thing that comes."

@morganprains

Replying to @Belinda_H12 thank you for this 🧡 #childhoodcancerawareness

She calls Reece "a literal superhero," and people agree. Seeing how this kiddo had learned to take on his challenges with gusto-filled resilience and enthusiasm is something we can all learn from.

You can follow Morgan Handley for more updates on TikTok.

How are these both high schoolers?

Have you ever looked back at your parents’ high school yearbook and thought that all the 11th graders looked like they were in their early 30s? Whether they were in school in the ‘60s and the kids had horn-rimmed glasses or the ‘80s with feathered hair, they looked at least a decade older than today's high school kids. One wonders if in 30 years, kids look at a yearbook from 2025 and see boys with broccoli cuts and girls with nose rings and they think, “What are they, 35?”

The folks at Bright Side did a deep dive into the phenomenon and found a few reasons why people looked so much older in the past than they do now. It’s a mix of how our minds perceive older fashion and why people age more gracefully in modern times.

Why did people look older in the past?

“Specialists have looked into this phenomenon, and it does have some scientific facts to back it up,” the narrator states. “It's not necessarily that our ancestors looked older; it's more that we appear to look younger. And younger as generations go by, that's because over time humans have improved the way they live their lives in the us alone over the last 200 years.”

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

A big reason people looked a lot older when photography became common in the late 1800s is that it happened at a time when we were making tremendous advances in public health. The 1880s to the 1920s were a time of rapid advancement, when we began to understand infectious diseases and how they spread. “We gained access after safer types of foods, and we understand the importance of clean water. Our individual lifestyle choices can impact the way we look,” the video says.

The way we work has also drastically changed how people look. Working in an office for eight hours a day in air conditioning will keep you a lot younger-looking than working all day as a Victorian chimney sweep. Plus, for people who work outside, sunscreen has made it much easier to protect our skin and decrease wrinkles.

Let’s not forget the importance of a straight, white smile. Advances in dental care also help make people look younger.

1970s girls, high school girls, girls in uniforms, old high school photos, nostalgiaA "girl gang" in 1976. via Earthworm/Flickr

Why do people wearing styles from the past appear older?

Finally, there’s the clothes issue, and, yes, this does have a big impact on how we view the age of people from the past. “Our brains are wired to associate old trends with being old,” the video says. “For example, your grandpa might still have the shirt he wore in that 1970s picture, and it's because of that shirt that you retroactively associate that trend with being old, despite the fact that your granddad does look younger in the picture than he looks today. “

girls in school, '60s high school girls, class room, old-school cool,GIrls in class in the 1960s.via Phillips Academy/Flickr

In the end, the fact that people look a lot younger today than they did in the past is a testament to how the quality of life has drastically improved since cameras were first invented. However, that doesn’t mean that fashion has improved at all. You have to admit that your dad with that fly butterfly collar in his 1977 graduation photo looks better than that multi-colored, Machine Gun Kelly-style hoodie you see guys wearing in high schools today.

Love Stories

Bride planned an autism-friendly wedding so her daughter could fully participate in the moment

"Weddings aren't about perfection–they're about love. And for us, love meant creating a day that felt good for Sofia, too."

@jodiebevan08/TikTok (with permission)

Bride has an autism-friendly wedding so her daughter with special needs can be a part of her big day.

Weddings are beautiful, sentimental days–but wedding days can also being *extremely* chaotic. So when bride Jodie Bevan (@jodiebevan08) began planning her wedding to groom Matthew, every detail revolved around making it an autism-friendly day for her teenage daughter Sofia.

In a series of TikTok video, bride Jodie documented exactly how she made Sofia comfortable on her wedding day. From her outfit choice to glam, every detail centered on Sofia's needs.

"We planned our wedding day around Sofia's needs as a teen with autism and special needs. From her dress material to a calm hairstyle, to a sensory toy bag. How Sofia would be on our day was my biggest worry but she was honestly incredible and I couldn't be more proud of her 🤍," she captioned the post.

@jodiebevan08

We planned our wedding day around Sofia's needs as a teen with autism and special needs. From her dress material to a calm hairstyle, to a sensory toy bag. How Sofia would be on our day was my biggest worry but she was honestly incredible and I could be more proud of her 🤍 Thankyou again @BTS | Luxury Wedding Content for capturing all these beautiful videos 🤍. #AutismAcceptance #InclusiveWedding #SofiaStrong #SensoryFriendly #SpecialNeedsParent #NeurodivergentLove #WeddingWithHeart #weddingday #weddingdress #weddingflowers #autismawareness #senmum #senmumlife #fyp

"Planning our wedding with Sofia's needs first. We made all of our vendors aware of Sofia's needs beforehand, including the photographer. We got Sofia's photos done first so she could relax," she shared in the video.

Next, she noted the detail paid to Sofia's clothing as the video showed her helping Sofia get changed for the wedding ceremony. "This was the first time she's worn a dress in over 10+ years! We made sure it wasn't an itchy material, not too fussy or long," she added. "She had her comfort clothes to change into after photos were done. These are the shoes she wears every single day but in a white version." (Sofia also held a teddy bear that was dressed in a suit.)

@jodiebevan08

Reading the comments in my last video has made me realise how much more awareness we need for special needs children. I know I am doing a good job at being Sofias advocate. I am her safe place, so what ever I am doing, I’m doing it right 🤍 #sen #autismawareness #autismacceptance #senparentsoftiktok #senmum #specialneeds #fyppppppppppppppppppppppp #weddingtok #weddingday

After explaining Sofia's clothing, Jodie went on to give details on hair and makeup. "Hair is a BIG sensory trigger for Sofia, so we went for something very simple, no fuss and went at her pace," she shared. "The amazing hairdresser even managed to curl it! We asked for minimal makeup, just skincare and brows. This wasn't needed but she enjoyed this and I wanted her to feel included."

Finally, Jodie shared how she made Sofia feel comfortable during the wedding reception with sensory toys. "I packed a bag of all things she likes. Toys, pens, paper, iPad, etc and placed this on her eat at the wedding breakfast," she wrote.

@jodiebevan08

Having special needs we’ve always known Sofia will never get married or walk down the isle in a white dress - I cant tell you how much this moment means to me🤍 The moment she spots Matthew too "my matthew"🥹I couldn’t be more proud of her, not only walking into a room full of people she doesn’t know but even wearing a dress when she lives in leggins and jumpers daily! Thank you for capturing this @BTS | Luxury Wedding Content I will forever be grateful 🤍 #senmum #weddingdress #weddingvibes #specialneeds #autismawareness #weddingday #weddingtok #fyppppppppppppppppppppppp

Jodie ended the post with a sweet note about what it meant to include Sofia on her special day. "Weddings aren't about perfection–they're about love. And for us, love meant creating a day that felt good for Sofia, too."

And viewers absolutely loved every heartfelt detail Jodie paid attention to for Sofia's comfort. "I’m sorry but the teddy bear in the suit 😭😭😭💖💖💖💖," one commented, and Jodie replied, "He was her plus one 😂😂🤍." Another viewer added, "You say weddings aren't about perfection but I think this is the most perfect expression of love for your family ❤️." And another viewer shared, "My sister has autism and she was my bridesmaid, she’s 13 and it was first time she wore a dress in many years and to say she smashed it was a understatement 💗," and Jodie responded, "That’s amazing! I felt so proud of Sofia even wearing the dress as I knew how big even that was for her 🤍." And another viewer commented, "my goodness this made me so emotional. how amazing ❤️."

An angry man in front of the American flag.

America has never been a perfect place, but since the Civil War, it has been one where most people bought into the idea of the country and supported the institutions that keep it running. People may disagree on politics and culture, but when America was threatened, whether it was 9/11 or World War II, people came together to fight for the country they love, even though the reasons may have differed.

However, it’d be naive to say that sentiment is still as strong as it once was. Since The Great Recession, many people have felt that the vibes are off in America, and polls and research back those feelings. Right around 2012, when smartphones became ubiquitous, there was a considerable rise in the number of people who felt that America was on the wrong track and that racism and sexism were considerably worse than they were just a year before. There was also a big spike in mental illness.

So what happened in 2012? Did the world suddenly become drastically worse overnight, or had our perceptions been changed?

woman, dispair, smartphone, bad news, woman in kitchen, upset womanA woman is upset looking at her smartphone.via Canva/Photos

Why does it feel like America is on the decline?

Other developed countries have experienced similar vibe shifts since 2012, but it has hit America the hardest. Economics blogger Noah Smith explains why this feeling of malaise has hit America so hard, and he illustrates it perfectly in a viral Substack piece called “Social media destroyed one of America's key advantages.” Smith is an American blogger and commentator on economics and current events and former assistant professor of behavioral finance at Stony Brook University.

In his Substack post, Smith postulates that the technological change hit America the hardest because it punctured our geographical buffers. “A hippie in Oakland and a redneck in the suburbs of Houston both fundamentally felt that they were part of the same unified nation; that nation looked very different to people in each place,” Smith writes. “Californians thought America was California, and Texans thought America was Texas, and this generally allowed America to function.”

Why did America fundamentally change in 2012?

Here’s an excerpt from Smith’s piece. Please check out the entire piece on the Noahpinion Substack.

Like some kind of forcible hive mind out of science fiction, social media suddenly threw every American in one small room with every other American. Decades of hard work spent running away from each other and creating our ideologically fragmented patchwork of geographies went up in smoke overnight, as geography suddenly ceased to mediate the everyday discussion of politics and culture.

The sudden collapse of geographic sorting in political discussion threw all Americans in the same room with each other — and like the characters in Sartre’s No Exit, they discovered that “Hell is other people.” Conservatives suddenly discovered that a lot of Americans despise Christianity or resent White people over the legacy of discrimination. Liberals suddenly remembered that a lot of their countrymen frown on their lifestyles. Every progressive college kid got to see every piece of right-wing fake news that their grandparents were sharing on Facebook (whereas before, these would have been quietly confined to chain emails). Every conservative in a small town got to see Twitter activists denouncing White people. And so on.


protests, american protest, protest sign, demonstration, mass gatheringA group of people protesting in the street.via Ted Eytan/Flickr

It may sound cynical to believe that America was a better place when people were less likely to talk to people with a different worldview. But, given how things have gone in the past 15 years, it’s fair to say that putting every American in a proverbial ring to fight it out just makes everyone feel under attack... and the fight never ends.

The problem with the Like button

Another development around the same time that many believe negatively affected the country was the development of the Like button on Facebook. The button made its debut in 2009, and it, along with the share button, which came in 2010, incentivized people to create content that their audience agreed with, creating echo chambers. The buttons also incentivized people to make outrage-provoking posts and create fake stories to go viral and increase advertising revenue.

maga, trump supporters, trump flags, trump rally, american flagsTrump supporters at a rally.via Elvert Barnes/Flickr

The positive takeaway from Smith’s geographical sorting theory is that, quite possibly, many people’s perceptions about life in Amerca are wrong because we’re seeing it through the distorted, funhouse mirror of social media that shows us every bad deed in a country of 330 million people and amplifies the voices of the unscroupulous. By pinpointing the moment that America “went to hell,” as author Jonathan Haidt says, we also have a roadmap to get back to when people had greater faith in America’s institutions and people.