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"Thank you for being patient": Baby on first flight 'writes' adorable note to passengers

The note was so sweet. It was also completely unnecessary.

@callmebelly/TikTok
An excellent reminder to show kindness and patience.

Listening to a baby cry during a flight might be aggravating, but it’s nothing compared to the moans, groans, and eyerolls that the baby's parents must endure from other passengers when it happens. No matter what tips and tricks are used to try to soothe a little one’s temperament while 30,000 miles in the air, crying is almost inevitable. So, while having to ease their own child’s anxiety, moms and dads also must suffer being the pariah of the trip. What a nightmare.

Airplanes are a particularly tricky public space in which to take your children. First, unlike, say, fine dining or the opera, flying with a baby isn't always optional. Sometimes, a certain level of travel is required of your life and small children have to come along. Second, and probably worst of all, there is no escape from the airplane once you've boarded. No matter what happens; crying, puking, blowouts, or spills — you're stuck dealing with it, and the dirty looks, until the plane has landed.

Recently, one mom was apparently trying so hard to avoid upsetting her fellow flight members that she went above and beyond to essentially apologize ahead of time if her baby began to cry on its first flight.

It was a gesture that, while thoughtful, had folks really feeling for how stressed that poor mom must be.

In a clip posted to his TikTok, one of the passengers—Elliot—explained that the mom handed out small care packages to those nearby.

“She’s already so busy and took the time to make these bags for everyone,” Elliot said, before panning the camera to reveal a Ziplock bag full of candy, along with a note that made him “want to cry.”

The note read: “It’s my first flight. I made a deal to be on my best behaviour—but I can’t make any guarantees. I might cry if I get scared or if my ears start to hurt. Here are some treats to make your flight enjoyable. Thank you for being patient with us. Have a great flight.”

Elliot appeared to be choked up at the thoughtfulness on display as he examined the contents of the bags.

Like Elliot, those who watched the video felt some ambivalence at the well intentioned act. Many felt remorse that she would feel the need to appease people in this way.

“This is so sweet but also … kind of breaks my heart that we live in a world in which parents feel the need to do that.”

“Because jerk people have shamed parents into believing that they need to apologize for their kids' absolutely normal behavior. What a gem of a mom.”

“You know that sweet mom worried about this trip so much.”

“That poor mom probably spent nights awake … nervous about that flight, thinking of ways to keep strangers happy.”

"That's a mom trying so hard."

"the fact she took up valuable carry on space for these treat bags"

"Always wondered if we don’t bring kids out in public how can they learn to act in public? thank you for being so sweet to this mom"

Then again, who wouldn't appreciate some free candy and a friendly note?!


Many rallied behind the mom, arguing that making others feel more comfortable with her child being on board was in no way her responsibility.

“No mom should be apologizing. Adults can control their emotions … babies not …. Hugging this mom from a distance.”

“Dear new parents: no you don’t have to do this. Your babies have the right to exist. We all know babies cry. We know you try your best.”

Many commenters pointed out that a crying baby is far more stressful on the parent than other passengers. It's so easy to pop in your headphones and crank up your music or movie if someone else's baby is bothering you. Not so easy when you're the one responsible for soothing them!

The care package trend, sometimes called a "pre-apology", has become all the rage in recent years.

Passengers seem to universally find them adorable and fun. And some parents even enjoy the time and care it takes to make them. In a way, it can help ease the anxiety that naturally comes along with flying with a baby. It also creates a fun memory of that first flight.

But it's definitely not something any parent should feel like they have to do.

Etiquette expert Jo Hayes told What To Expect "Airplane goodie bags are all well and good for the craft-inclined or if you’re just excited to commemorate your little one’s first flight, but it's not the expectation that all parents must do this. Heaven knows, parents have enough pressure on them as is."

@xopolkadots34xo

the cutest lil flight package.. my jaw was on the floor so sweet 🥹 #babytok #travel #fyp

Luckily, there are just as many stories of fellow passengers being completely compassionate towards parents with small children—from simply choosing to throw on their headphones during a tantrum (instead of throwing one themselves) to going out of their way to comfort a baby (and taking the load off a frazzled parent in the process). These little acts of kindness make more of an impact than we probably realize. Perhaps if we incorporated more of this “it takes a village” mindset, flying could be a little bit more pleasant for everyone involved.

This article originally appeared in February. It has been updated.

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Mom of identical twins joked about mixing them up. Then real twin mix-up stories poured in.

Apparently, this is not a terribly uncommon occurrence with identical twin babies.

Photo credit: Canva

It's entirely possible for parents to mix up identical twins.

Having twins is unarguably a wild ride straight from the get go, but having identical twins is a whole other layer of fun. Two babies at once who look exactly alike right down to their little DNA strands and who share a bond like no other on Earth? It's an adventure for sure.

People like to joke about mixing up identical twins, and twins themselves will often play practical jokes swapping identities on people who can't tell them apart. But what happens if a parent literally loses track and doesn't know which baby is which? Does that actually happen? And what do they do if it does?

A video from @thetwinniesmom shows her twin babies dressed in identical "BEST BUDS" shirts with the text, "They don't know it yet but in 30 minutes I will be taking them to the hospital because I mixed them up." It got nearly 9 million views and thousands of comments.

@thetwinniesmom

#identical #twins #babies #brothers #parenting #hospital #birth #birthstories #pregnant #delivering #funny #comedy #silly #satire #baby #mom

The post was hash tagged as satire and comedy, but judging by the comments that poured in, mixing up identical twin babies is a real thing that can happen, and more easily than you might think. As one commenter wrote, "Do I have twins? Nope! Did this unlock a new fear? Yep!"

People's personal stories of twin baby mix-ups show how it happens:

"My identical twins bracelets fell off beside one another at about a week old...I made a good guess...lol. Twin A may now be twin B."

"My mother left my father home alone with my twin sister and I once when we were infants. He took off our bracelets to bath us. My mother came home during the bathing process, took one look at the bracelets and asked if he knew which twin was which. Look of horror, and then a stab in the dark. So, I might not have the name I was given at birth."

identical twins, babies, twin mix-up, twin swap, parenting, newborn babies Newborn babies have bracelets with their identity on them, but once those come off parents are on their own.Photo credit: Canva

"My father's baby book says that he was born first, and that he was the heavier twin. He and his twin brother were looking at it one day and my grandmother remarked that that couldn't be right -- she remembered the doctor being surprised because the heavier one was second. Those two have been mixed up since day 1."

"This actually happened to a pair of twins I know, they only found out around age 17 because of an invisible physical variation (I cannot remember what it was, but it occurred to the second twin during birth, torn something or other) that supposedly belonged to X that belonged to Y. The names switched between the hospital and home."

"I have a friend with identicals. She kept nail polish on one's big toes to tell them apart. To her dismay, at 2 months old, the nail polish wore off before she could reapply. They are older now and have extremely different personalities. But she took a leap of faith and called one A and the other B though she wasn't sure. Still not sure, lol."

"I once fed the same twin twice.🤣 They were a few days old. 😬🥰"

identical twins, babies, twin mix-up, twin swap, parenting, newborn twinsFeeding the same newborn twin twice? It happens.Photo credit: Canva

Some twins shared that they may have been switched without knowing.

"I'm a twin who was supposedly born having seizures for days. I am now 'fine,' while my sister gets seizures, severe migraines and has two autoimmune disorders. Forever wondering if we got switched. Our drs insist I just grew out of it 😭 They SWEAR our bloodwork matches up."

"Identical twins here 🤣 I always liked my sisters name better. Maybe it was mine first. 🤔"

"My twin and I were raised by hippies. I’m pretty sure they have no clue to this day who’s who."

"My mom used to say that only my older sister could definitively tell my brother & I apart as babies when both she and my dad struggled. My sister is only 18 months older than us, so I suspect the validity of this, and that she may have just been randomly picking and may parents took her judgement as truth."

identical twins, babies, twin mix-up, twin swap, parentingbaby twins GIFGiphy

It's actually totally understandable that parents would mix up twins. Parental instincts can only go so far, and when you're trying to manage life with two infants at once, phew. But people did share methods for trying to keep them straight:

"I always wonder if I mixed up my twins they look different now, but when they were little, they looked identical I didn’t take their hospital bracelets off for like a month because I was so scared, I was gonna mix them up."

"I painted one of my twins’ big toenail green because his name is Seth and i could remind myself Seth Green, like the actor. This worked until they both ended up being transported to the hospital in an ambulance without me and by the time I got there, the polish was removed for a pulse ox monitor. I worried for months that they had been mixed up, but finally spotted the tiniest fleck of green on Seth’s toenail as it grew out. 😅"

"My mirror image identical twins were 6 ounces apart, I had to weigh them to see which was who lol."

identical twins, babies, twin mix-up, twin swap, parentingIt's not easy to tell identical twins apart if they don't have any distinct natural markings.Photo credit: Canva

"I saw someone say they put temporary tattoos on one baby."

"My husband is a twin. His mother put a dot of nail polish on his twin’s big toe nail until they were like 4. lol"

"Simple trick : get a fingerprint reader, could be an old iPhone for example. Register the fingerprints of only one of the twins. In case of doubt, scan both of them, the one who unlocks the iPhone is the good one (the other one is the evil twin of course)."

""If I had twins they’d definitely wear specific color wristbands until I could finally figure out which is which.""

"I’d mix them up and just start using their names interchangeably until they were old enough to tell me."

identical twins, babies, twin mix-up, twin swap, parentingIdentical sneezesGiphy by America's Funniest Home Videos

And really, at the end of the day. does it really matter if they get switched around as infants? Barring any known health issues, it's really just a name.

"I'm an identical twin. If our parents ever mixed us up and we've lived our whole life as the wrong one, it's no big deal. 😁"

"I’m a twin and this is what I’ve always said! 😂 It doesn’t change who you are if you were mixed up at some point, just your name lol."

"I asked a friend of mine how she could tell her twins apart when they were a few weeks old. She said she couldn’t a lot of the time and just figured whatever name they had when she could tell them apart would stick. I strive for that level of laid back."

Seriously, having twins is such a wild ride.

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Mom sparks debate when she says she no longer brings snacks and water when out with her 3-year-old

The teachers loved the idea. Not all the parents were convinced.

Canva Photos

A mom went viral for explaining why she won't bring snacks and water on short outings with her 3-year-old

It's a struggle all parents run into eventually. It becomes too much, and far too annoying, to be responsible for every aspect of your children's lives and well-being. At some point, they need to start taking ownership over the things that are important to them. When they hit the age where they begin to really care about what they wear? They better be involved in doing their own laundry! Got soccer practice? Better remember to get dressed and pack your bag before it's time to go.

Mom and dad can't be the only ones keeping everyone on track 24/7. But, of course, this is a battle that's fought both in our homes and in American culture at large. Kids are less independent now than the were in previous generations. Fewer kids walk to school or play outside unsupervised. And some say that it shows.

One mom is using a "harsh" parenting technique to instill this kind of independence in her kids from an early age.


moms, mothers, parenting, kids, toddlers, babies, consequences, punishment, psychologySome argue that kids need tough love from an early age to learn independence and responsibility. Photo by Gabe Pierce on Unsplash

Chelsea, a professor and homesteader, recently took to TikTok to share some words of wisdom that have helped her in raising her 1- and 3-year-olds without collapsing from constant overwhelm.

"I don't know who needs to hear this but if you have little kids, you have to try one of my favorite recent parenting techniques," she says in the selfie-style video. "This might sound a little crazy or a little crude, but i promise if you listen, I will explain how this has added so much value."

She begins by offering an example of a scenario most parents can relate to.

"The other day we were driving in the car and from the backseat [my 3-year-old] calls 'Mom, I'm hungry!' My response to her when she said she was hungry was 'Oh, did you bring a snack?'"

The essence of Chelsea's independence technique is that she no longer brings snacks, water, or entertainment like books and games on short trips out with her kids. Instead, she pushes them to remember to bring what they need.

"I know, this sounds a little harsh. I promise, I'm not letting them go hungry, I'm not letting them go thirsty," Chelsea says. "They are very hydrated, well fed kids. This is used in very specific scenarios. But what this does is it puts a little bit of the responsibility and the ownership on them."

"Number one, it helps her understand that she has to take some responsibility in bringing something [she needs.]" Though, the mom of two adds that she helps remind her daughter before they leave the house to make sure she has everything she needs.

"I'm helping her prepare, but i'm also teaching her a little bit of a natural consequence. Because if she doesn't bring her water or her snack, then her natural consequence is she doesn't get snack."

After using this technique for a while, Chelsea notices that her daughter will remember on her own far more often. And if she does forget, mom's often got her back. Chelsea states that if her daughter forgets her water and mom just so happens to have one for her, her daughter is incredibly grateful and appreciative. I think all parents would like more of that sentiment from their kids!

Watch the whole clip here:

@sunny_acres_regen_farm

My small contribution to making the next generation less entitled #mom #toddlermom #toddlers #parenting #homestead

The video racked up over 400,000 views and left parents, teachers, and other commenters extremely divided.

Some loved the idea. Teachers, especially, were keen on the idea of kids coming into their classrooms having learned more responsibility and independence at home from a young age:

"I’m a teacher and this will help your children so much. A lot of kids don’t know how to solve problems or take responsibility"

"I’m a kindergarten teacher and I approve this message"

"As a teacher, thank you. I can tell asap when a child had never been responsible for a single thing in their life. Then they get to kinder and are lost bc someone has always done everything for them"

Teachers have a great perspective because they see and work closely with so many kids. They're really plugged in to bigger trends and concerns that affect the entire age group and not just one single kid or family. So when they say kids need to learn more independence early, it's usually a good idea to listen.

Some commenters chimed in that they, themselves, were raised this way, or had used similar approaches successfully with their own kids:

"Seriously, I don’t remember being offered snacks and drinks constantly or having them always around anywhere all the time. If we were out and about a lot of times I had to wait (within reason)"

"I did this with my now adult children. My youngest (18) is constantly shocked by his friends who aren’t like him and his siblings."

Some people, however, had concerns with whether this technique was age-appropriate for a toddler:


moms, mothers, parenting, kids, toddlers, babies, consequences, punishment, psychologyIt can be tough for toddlers to think ahead about the future consequences of their behavior.Giphy

"my boomer mom said things like this and it created a lot of anxiety that I had to remember to take care of myself and I felt abandoned"

"I dont like this at all! Why should a THREE year old need to be concerned with bringing her own water?"

"a good technique for older kids but i think your kids are too young so it's not a developmentally appropriate expectation"

"A more age appropriate way would be have her help you pack her bag."

These commenters are right in that natural consequences is a very effective parenting technique, but it can also be fraught. There's a fine line between teaching kids responsibility and making them feel like no one is looking out for them. 3-years-old is a really tricky age for this kind of parenting. Toddlers can understand immediate cause-and-effect relationships, but have trouble linking their actions with future consequences. So while there's nothing wrong with introducing concepts of consequences, independence, and responsibility to kids 3 and under, it's important to keep expectations in line with what's age-appropriate.

It sounds like Chelsea's got a good handle on the right balance, but in less-careful hands this kind of approach could be a disaster.


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Mom comes up with the perfect way to describe baby kicks, and minds are blown

Now everyone is trying it.

Photo credit: Canva

A pregnant woman feeling her baby kick (left) an astonished woman (right)

What exactly does it feel like to have a baby kicking inside of you? For those of us that have never been pregnant, and wish to remain childless, this will remain somewhat of a mystery forever. Even those who have been pregnant and felt their bab kick might have a hard time quantifying the sensation.

And yet, thanks to a now-viral video posted by self proclaimed ”boy mamma with good ideas” Kat (@__mmkayy), we have an analogy that depicts this phenomenon perfectly. Or at least, millions of viewers seem to agree that’s the case, anyway.

In the clip, Kat explained how she had been asked by a coworker “What does it feel like when the baby moves?” When an answer didn’t come straight away, the mom-to-be became determined to come up with something that fully encapsulated the experience.


 
 @__mmkayy How to explain how it feels when a baby moves inside when pregnant! #howdoesitfeelwhenthebabymoves #babymovinginbelly #explained #babymovement #pregnant ♬ original sound - kat 
 
 


Then, she found it. A clear, precise, incredibly specific, tangible answer.

“It’s like when you put your hand on your cheek and move your tongue,” especially if you do a “soft but firm, slow kind of movement” with said tongue. Badda bing, badda boom.

It’s easy to see how almost anyone could immediately understand what Kat means on a visceral level, which makes it such an appropo description.

Down in the comments, people’s minds were a little blown…if not nostalgic.

“Everybody rn 😮”

“You need to get paid for this info somehow because it's absolutely correct.”

“This makes me want to be pregnant again. I’m suing you.”

“Shakespeare could never do this.”

baby kicking, pregnancy, moms, motherhood, moms of tiktok, first trimester, babies, being pregnantmedia2.giphy.com

“YOU CRACKED THE CODE!!”

“Ma’am you deserve a 🏅best description I ever heard.”

And of course, many folks joked about how they would be trying out her little analogy themselves.

“The way you’ve got a few hundred thousand people pressing their hands on their faces and wiggling their tongues against it. You hold a lot of power ma’am.”

“Me having two children, also checking out how it feels per your instructions.”

The first sign of baby kicks, aka “the quickening,” begin between weeks 16 and 25 of pregnancy, and start off very subtle, but tend to become stronger and more noticeable. And while the experience is generally a neutral, if not pleasant one, they can sometimes be painful for the pregnant woman, especially as the baby grows and has less room to move during later trimesters. In these instances, the kicks can feel like sharp or dull pain, or even numbness, and are often felt when the baby's limbs press against the ribs or abdomen.

But, for the most part, baby kicks are just one of those cool “my body is a freaking miracle of nature, look what it can do” moments for moms. Hard to quantify, but amazing to experience.

baby kicking, pregnancy, moms, motherhood, moms of tiktok, first trimester, babies, being pregnantmedia2.giphy.com

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