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Heroes

Some Strange Things Are Happening To Astronauts Returning To Earth

Who would have thought traveling to outer space could be such a profound experience? OK, probably everybody, but these former astronauts really articulate it in a way that was just a little mind-blowing.

brown fish beside coral under body of water

The ocean covers more than 70 percent of our planet—yet there’s so much about it that we don’t yet know. Experts, in fact, believe we’ve only explored about five percent of the ocean so far—meaning that most of it remains completely unseen and undiscovered.

What we do know, however, is that the ocean is truly wise. Not only does it sustain all human and animal life on the planet, the creatures under the sea continue to give scientists insight that can transform human lives as well (just read about the amazing axolotl below to see what we mean).

A happy ocean makes for happy, healthy human beings (not to mention a healthy planet)—so this summer we’re helping our friends at Ocean Wise spread the word that no action is too small—holding a cleanup on a local shoreline, for instance. Learning about our ocean and all its wonders is another step anyone can take for conservation, so buckle in and prepare for a tidal wave of info that will blow your mind.

1. Playing music—specifically, recordings of healthy reef soundscapes—can help grow coral reef populations.

live coralsPhoto by QUI NGUYEN on Unsplash

Healthy coral reef populations are filled with diverse sounds, thanks to the fish, snapping shrimp, and other marine life that live there. Scientists have found that playing recorded sounds of healthy reefs actually attract coral larvae, since the sounds indicate a healthy, vibrant habitat. Using this knowledge, scientists have taken recorded reef sounds, played them near degraded reefs, and in doing so, have increased the settlement rates of coral larvae, helping the coral reefs regenerate.

2. Dolphins like to party with pufferfish.

Photo by Talia Cohen on Unsplash

How’s this for a good time? Dolphins, particularly younger ones, have been known to seek out pufferfish to play games with them, chewing on them and passing them back and forth between each other like a hacky sack. Not only is this entertainment for the dolphins, scientists theorize that they may intentionally be trying to get the pufferfish to give off a neurotoxin called tetrodotoxin (TTX)–which is a chemical they release when threatened. This chemical is highly toxic in large doses–but in small quantities, experts think that it might induce a mild, pleasurable effect in the dolphins, similar to a narcotic. Party on.

3. Male humpback whales are total crooners.

A male humpback whale breaches the water.

Photo by Thomas Kelley on Unsplash

All humpback whales can vocalize, but male humpback whales actually sing.

During mating season, scientists have observed male humpback whales making sounds that are distinctly different from other humpback calls. Unlike other sounds, these songs have a clear structure, and use small, repetitive “phrases” organized in a specific sequence—in the same way humans sing different verses during a song. Even more amazing? Male humpbacks all sing the same song together in “choruses,” in sessions that last from five minutes to several hours.

4. Axolotls have superpowers (and scientists think it could benefit humans one day).

a couple of animals that are in some waterPhoto by T K on Unsplash

Among biologists, axolotls are known for their ability to regrow lost or damaged tissue. When an adult axolotl loses a limb, they can actually grow it back in just a few months time, thanks to a substance they produce called retinoic acid, which plays a large role in regenerating skin cells. (If the name sounds familiar, it’s because retinoic acid is a derivative of Vitamin A, and it’s commonly found in skin creams.) While we already know that retinoic can make our skin look fabulous, scientists are currently studying whether it could someday help human limbs regrow, similar to the axolotl’s.

5. A healthy ocean can help reverse climate change

green algae underwater photographyPhoto by Brian Yurasits on Unsplash

The ocean generates half of the oxygen we breathe and absorbs nearly a third of the world’s carbon emissions. Phytoplankton, the microscopic algae that float near the ocean’s surface, are a big part of the reason why. But there’s another unsung hero—kelp. Unlike phytoplankton, kelp are large seaweeds that grow in dense underwater forests along coastlines, absorbing CO2 and supporting ecosystems. Ocean Wise is helping bring back these powerful carbon sinks one kelp forest at a time.

Help us #BeOceanWise by doing one small thing for ocean conservation in your community (because just one thing can start a huge wave of positive change). Visit ocean.orgfor tips and tricks to keep our oceans healthy because no action is too small.

Parenting

Millennial dad of 3 unloads on boomer parents over their unreasonable holiday plans

"Yeah, not this time," he said. "I think for the holidays I'm just gonna stay in and relax."

via Canva/Photos
A Millennial dad has had it with his boomer dad's expectations.

The holidays are supposed to be a time for enjoying special moments with family, but often they become a source of stress. Traveling, navigating familial relationships and tensions, talking politics at the dinner table, and handling the all-encompassing issue of "presents" can wear down even the most patient and even-keeled person. It can be especially challenging for parents with young kids who are expected to travel long distances in the name of "family togetherness."

A TikTok video posted by @carrerasfam is going viral, with over 300,000 views, because so many millennial parents can relate to the frustration of grandparents having unrealistic expectations related to visiting with the kids.

In the satirical video, a husband stages a conversation with his "practically retired" baby boomer dad, in which he explains politely but firmly that he’s not taking his 3 young kids on a 400-mile drive to their house for the holidays.

Carerras Fam is a popular TikTok page about “all things postpartum and mamahood.” Together, the mom and dad share funny skits and slices of their life with three little ones.

The husband opens the conversation with his dad by explaining all the inconveniences of taking 3 young kids on a long road trip. “I know you want us to drive down for the holidays, but it's kinda ridiculous that you want me to pack my 3 kids with their portable beds with my clothes, their clothes, the formula, everything that goes on with raising 3 kids and having them feel comfortable. Drive down for over four hours just so that we could spend some time in your house?” the husband says while absurdist music plays in the background.


@carrerasfam

Sorry it’s just so much work. But you’re welcome to visit us #millennial #millennials #parents #parenting #parentsontiktok #boomers #millennials

It’s obviously inconvenient for the couple to pack up their kids and drive 4 hours, but it’s also unsafe because the house is not baby-proof. "I'm gonna have to run around, make sure that they don't break any of your stuff, and which you will 'take care of them,'” the husband continues using sarcastic air quotes. Most parents eventually realize that visiting with the kids does not equate to getting help with them — no, it means chasing them around frantically yourself until it's time to leave.

The dad brings up another great point: His parents are in good health, so why don’t they drive to their house? “You could visit. You don't have little kids,” the dad continues. “You don't have anything going on.

"Why is it that every time I have to make the effort for you, yet you can't do the most basic thing for me?”

millennials, baby boomers, parenting, dads, moms, babysitting, grandparents, parenting tips, family, love, kidsAll parents feel like this when it comes to spending time with the grands.Giphy

It’s clear from the phone call the dad understands that traveling with the kids and staying in a house that isn’t correctly set up for young kids will make the holiday a struggle. Instead of making memories, they’ll most likely be running around bent over trying to save their kids from breaking something or hanging out at Target buying electrical socket plugs and a bottle brush because they left theirs at home. What's especially frustrating is the pressure and expectations. Parents are often guilted for not wanting to pack up the the kids and travel, even though it's not hard to see why they hate it so much.

The video struck a chord with many millennial parents. Nearly 500,000 people watched the clip with hundreds and hundreds pouring in to vent their own similar frustrations.


@carrerasfam

Something needs to change #parenting #parents

“First holiday with a kid… parents are confused why I won’t drive 9 hours with a 3mnth old for Christmas,” too_many_catz writes.

“The ‘not baby proofed’ part hit my soullllllll. It’s so stressful having to chase your kids around and ask to close doors, move pictures, block stairs, etc. And nobody takes you seriously!" OhHeyItsIndy added.

It’s also expensive for young families to travel. “Add to it they want us to spend money on gas, airfare, etc. when we live paycheck to paycheck and rent while they own homes and live comfortably off a pension,” another user wrote.

"My mom asked me to drive 13 hours with our 2 month old…she doesn’t work and has flight points," one mom added.

This one hit hard: “They always act like you're asking the world of them, yet they will willingly go on any other vacation that they choose,” Mackenzie Byrne wrote.

"They can never make the trip for us but they can make them trips to Europe and cruises to the Caribbean," another user noted.

TX Travel Chick may have hit the nail on the head with her explanation for why boomer parents expect their children to road trip it to their house for the holidays. “Because we are used to following their orders!!! REVOLT,” she wrote.

millennials, baby boomers, parenting, dads, moms, babysitting, grandparents, parenting tips, family, love, kidsSee ya next year, grandpaGiphy

Ultimately, it would be interesting to learn why boomer parents want to inconvenience their kids when it would be much easier for them to take a trip to see them, especially if they can afford a hotel. One wonders if they are being entitled or if they’ve forgotten how hard it is to travel with young kids. In some cases, it's a little more complicated — many baby boomer grandparents are still working and have less time and resources than previous generations did to help with the kids.

"Yeah, not this time," the dad sums up in the video. "I think for the holidays I'm just gonna stay in and relax."

It's a hilarious and relatable video, but ultimately, it's a skit. The power of boomer-grandparent guilt remains undefeated in many households, so the smart money says the Carreras family sucked it up and traveled for the holidays despite their annoyance. Here's hoping that together, we can eventually break the generational curse when our kids become parents one day.

This article originally appeared last year. It has been updated.

Canva Photos

The "worst rap cliche" actually makes a ton of sense when you learn about its history.

If I were to put you on the spot, right now, and force you to perform a freestyle rap, how would it go? If you're like 99% of the people on the planet who aren't naturally gifted in lyrical storytelling, you'd probably say something like, "My name is Mike and I'm here to say..." to get you off and running, and then your brain would scramble for something easy to rhyme with "say." Probably doing something in a "major way," right?

It's the first thought that comes into almost all of our heads, and it's a heavily used trope on sitcoms and in film. It's deeply embedded in pop culture lore, so much so that we've all absorbed the rhythm and cadence of the rhyme practically by osmosis—even kids who weren't even born during the early hip-hop of the 70s and 80s know it! But where the heck does it actually come from? Certainly, not a lot of real rappers use the line; not anymore. I heard it used on an episode of one of my favorite sitcoms the other night and got to wondering about its origin. I'm always fascinated by our sort of shared consciousness, how we "all" seem to intuitively know and understand things without ever understanding why—so I decided to do some digging.

When it comes to "My name is...and I'm here to say," one of the earliest known uses of the phrase came from, wait for it...a Chiquita Banana commercial created in the 1940s.

The specific line in question, sung by a sultry and unnecessarily-sexy cartoon banana in a low cut dress, goes like this:

"I'm Chiquita Banana and I've come to say / Bananas have to ripen in a certain way / When they're flecked with brown and have a golden hue / Bananas taste the best and are the best for you."

The commercial became iconic (the YouTube clip below, for example, has over three million views) and a staple moment in pop culture. If you can believe it, at that time bananas were relatively new to Americans. The fruit had been around for decades but different distributors and producers jockeying for position had kept it from really reaching the mainstream. The song was catchy as all get out and also helped Americans understand how to store, eat, and use this new exotic fruit; it was a reintroduction of sorts. Chiquita also desperately needed some positive press after the horrific Banana Massacre in 1928.

It's one of the most famous commercial jingles of all time.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

In 1988, Barney Rubble took a page out of Chiquita Banana's playbook and helped further cement the catchy rhyme into the zeitgeist.

If you don't remember the Fruity Pebbles commercials of the 80s and 90s, most of them feature Barney Rubble trying to trick or distract Fred Flintstone in order to steal his cereal. In this clip, Barney pretends to be a rapper, allowing him to (nearly) swipe the Fruity Pebbles while Fred is busy dancing to the beat.

"I'm the Master Rapper and I'm here to say / I love Fruity Pebbles in a major way ... But to get that fruity taste / I've gotta trick Fred"

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Those are two of the earliest iterations of the rhyming intro. But around the same time, the catchy catchphrase was beginning to show up in early hip hop.

Yes, honest to God rappers actually did use the phrase, contrary to popular belief.

In 1979, the legendary "Rapper's Delight" by Sugarhill Gang featured the line: "You see, I am wonder Mike and I'd like to say Hello / To the black, to the white, the red and the brown, the purple and yellow."

In 1983, Melle Mel drops the exact line to perfect in "The Birthday Party" by Grandmaster Flash & The Furious 5: "Melle Mel and I'm here to say / I was born on the 15th day of May"

But you might not have picked up on those if you weren't a big hip-hop listener at the time, so many people actually credit the commercials with "My name is..." catching on beyond the rap world.

At some point soon after, the rhyme became a trope used in sitcoms, more cheesy commercials, and films to portray someone who knows nothing about rap trying to rap.

Think of it like when parents start using their kids' slang, thus ruining it for everyone.

My personal favorite example has to be Will Ferrell's devil character from a Saturday Night Live sketch, struggling to write music, when he finally spits: "I'm the devil and I'm here to say / I'm the most evil rapper in the USA"

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Announcing your name at the start of a rap may seem like a cheesy trope now, but it actually had significance in the days of early rap.

Chaz Kangas writes for The Village Voice: "Whether literally tagging their name in graffiti in public spaces or mastering signature break dancing maneuvers, it was about getting your name in as many eyes and ears as possible. Of course, when it came to rocking the mic at a party to the break-a break-a dawn, there was no better way to have people know who you were than by identifying yourself."

Rappers still do it today, though the script has changed a bit. Most artists find a way, especially early in their career, to work their name into certain songs. It helps give them notoriety and it gives them some recognition for listeners who may have liked one of their guest verses on another artist's track. For crying out loud, one of the most famous and influential rap songs ever is literally called "My Name Is" by Eminem!

And as for the "I'm here to say" part? Well, it's a great segue into whatever comes next, and there are endless words and phrases you can rhyme with "say," so you're pretty much set if you decide to go with the cliched opener.

So, maybe it's not the worst rap trope ever. When you think about the storied history, the importance of name recognition, and the flexibility the rhyme gives you...maybe it's actually the best.

Pop Culture

Real women trying on 'micro shorts' is the comedy gold we didn't know we needed

Proof we don't need to force ourselves to fit into trends…unless we're needing a good laugh.

Women are trying Free People's 'micro shorts' with hilarious commentary

With every season, comes a new trendy fashion item that retailers push as the must-have piece. But as we know, no trend is universally flattering.

Case and point, last year, when Free People, a specialty lifestyle brand for bohemian styled fashion, released its "micro shorts," which, as you can probably guess, are teeny tiny. They might check off all the requirements for a pair of shorts...except, they appear to be about the length of underwear.

If you're thinking "there's no way those would look good," you're not wrong! And to prove that point, a couple of women bought some to try on so you don't have to. The videos are not only honest but hilarious.

In one video Nicole Walters, a New York Times best selling author and mom to three girls, decided to order the shorts to see how they looked on someone with, "thigh meat." She wears a size 12 and often jokes about being a curvier on the bottom. When she pulled the shorts out, it looked as if she was going to have to perform a magic trick to get them on. They looked to be the size a small child would wear, but they seemed to have gone on easily even though they looked extremely uncomfortable. She looked uncomfortable. The viewers likely looked uncomfortable.

"Oh wow. They're in there and by in there I mean everywhere. There's a lot of thigh meat happening right now in the, this region," Walters says as she gestures at her upper thighs. "There's some thigh meat, um...uh...I feel like they're definitely in some places that I didn't know I had."

Walter's review of the shorts has people in stitches as she jokes about her Christianity falling out of the shorts.

"It’s the Barbie walk for me lol!!! Thank you for your service," one person says.

"The way you warn us that you’re going to turn around almost made me scream with laughter," someone writes.

"I'm just going to go ahead and dial 911 for help bc looks like you may need the jaws of life to come out them shorts...lol!! Your commentary had me dying laughing..lol," another commenter jokes.

In another Free People "micro shorts" try on video, Nicole Story Dent braved the itty bitty shorts to show her audience the summer trend they can look forward to seeing. The first pair of shorts has multiple flaps that appear to be large pockets which inspires Dent to pretend to fly in them before the discomfort sinks in.

"It's kinda giving waitress...if they ever want to make a Waffle House-Hooters hybrid, we have their uniform, "she said. "We have been asking for more pockets so they delivered. Speaking of delivered, you could deliver a baby without having to take these shorts off."

Dent guessed that the shorts would be more like "jundies" or "janties" than jorts, the shorthand term for jean shorts. Commenters couldn't stop laughing at her description of the shorts while others provided her with words of wisdom.

"Do NOT drop it low in these jundies, that kind of contact with the club floor is NOT hygienic," someone wrote.

"'There is nothing vegan about these. There is absolutely a cat being harmed!' I’m cackling! You really should win something from Free People for this! @freepeople we found your next model," another person joked.

"This is the kind of content the internet was made for, it’s just so good. However my thighs started getting chafed just watching this," added a third.

If you're brave enough to give these micro shorts a try, go ahead and stock up on some baby powder for all the chaffing. However, it's all about long Bermuda shorts this year. And since no one can keep up with fashion's rapid pace anyway, why not just stick with what feels good?

This article originally appeared last year.

Humor

Comedian Jason Salmon explains the one joke Boomers and Millennials can laugh at together

"I think the key to understanding a generation is you've gotta understand the world they grew up in."

Canva,

A boomer, comedian Jason Salmon, and a millennial.

It's no secret that comedian Jason Salmon is an expert on generational differences. His stand-up is riddled with insightful jokes that perfectly encapsulate how many of us are, in part, a product of the times we grew up in.

He's a proud (fellow) Gen X-er and feels lucky to have been born to that generation. In his stand-up special Biscuits and Gravy, he discusses the many ways that Gen X is super special.

"It's easy to spot that we're a lucky generation, because we're sandwiched between the two most dynamically angry generations currently alive. Boomers and millennials hate each other. I hear it all the time! 'You're an idiot.' 'No, you're an idiot!' I'm like, 'Hey, you're both right.'"

But the truth is, he gives a graceful pass to all generations. "I think the key to understanding a generation is you've gotta understand the world they grew up in."

He admits that timing is everything. "Gen X was in that sweet spot in American history. After the Boomers had taught us to 'just say no' but before millennials taught us that 'no MEANT no.' But we were having a good time, we were!"

Upworthy spoke to Salmon who talks about how Gen X can help bridge generation gaps. "I think Gen X is uniquely positioned to help bridge divides, because we have one foot in the old school world of institutions and collective consciousness and one foot in the new age of social media and individualism."

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

In his comedy special, he also jokes that it's his calling to help generations understand each other. For example, "Boomers experienced Spider-Man only as a comic book and millennials think that his superpower is that every time he takes off his mask he's a different actor. That's too big of a chasm, so I feel like it's my job to translate between the generations."

He also gives a profoundly existential reason for that "chasm" between the two generations, using how they grew up getting directions as another example. "Millennials grew up with GPS. Every time they went on a journey, sitting next to them was this robot navigation butler, just whispering precise step-by-step instructions in the soothing voice of their choosing. And then when they look at the map, it's telling them they're the center of the universe. No matter how far they go or which direction they're headed, they're just this bright blue orb of hope that the entire world just arranges itself around. That's gotta mess with your sense of self."

Boomers, he claims, had quite the opposite experience. "Of course it's gonna irritate boomers because every time they went on a trip, the thing giving them directions was a disappointed spouse or parent. And NOT in the voice of their choosing, but in the voice they hated the most in the whole world."

maps, baby boomers, confusion, generations, gifConfused person looks at a map. Giphy GIF by Lidl Voyages

He points out how many of them were anything but universe-centered. When Boomers went on trips, "they had to start preparing the night before by unfolding a map sometimes the size of their house. And the first thing they had to do was figure out where they were on the map. Think about that! If every time you went on a trip, your first step was to find yourself? Do you realize the level of existential stability that requires?"

When we asked Salmon what his favorite part of being a Gen X-er is, he answered unequivocally: "We were the only generation not tied to a phone. Boomers had to stay home or miss a call. Younger generations depend on their phones for everything." But Gen X "had answering machines—like a babysitter for our phone. We'd go out for the night and leave our phone at home. When we came home, we'd know if something happened because a red light would be flashing on the answering machine. Then we'd press the button and get the lowdown on what happened while we were out."

At the end of the day, he believes that people are responding so positively to generational humor, because "most people are dealing with similar things in different incarnations." He adds, "For me, Gen X comedy helps to parallel those generational similarities because the two most dynamically different generations—and the biggest—are millennials and baby boomers. One just dipped a toe in the analog world and the other did the same in the digital world."

Gen X, Mario Brothers, 1980s, 1990s, generationsMario and Luigi stand with their arms crossed.Giphy, GIF by Bombay Softwares

A commenter under his YouTube clip backs this up. "Gen X was the first generation to become familiar with the VERY rapid development of technology, and grew up knowing they had to keep up… We can set up a VPN, beat Super Mario Brothers in one life, fix a roof and toilet, and were there when Tool and Rage Against the Machine were brand new (not just being 'rediscovered'). Fear us—we're bulletproof."

Humor

Comedian perfectly sums up everything you need to know about Gen X in three definitive words

"If y'all don't like this joke, guess what – you're only giving me more cred."

Photo supplied by Jason Salmon

Jason Salmon talks about generations through comedy.

Jason Salmon has his finger on the pulse of just what makes Generation X tick. But in typical X fashion, his own promotional YouTube page boasts that he's been "described as like getting the best advice you’ve ever gotten from the dumbest guy you know."

His humility only makes him that much more charming. But the truth is, what we think doesn't really matter to his X Generation. In his comedy special, Biscuits and Gravy, at one point he asks the audience if there are any Gen X-ers. A few people clap and cheer and he responds, "Yeah. I don't even care. That's how Gen X I am. That's a calling card to our generation."

@jsalmoncomedy

Gen X would like you to leave us alone #genxtiktok #dontcare #genx #genxtiktokers #lucky #Standupcomedy #Jokes #fyp #CleanComedy #jasonsalmon

He points out the unlikelihood of a Gen X-er even being offended by that. "That's not even dismissive to a Gen X-er. It's like 'I don't care.' 'I don't care, also. Nice to meet you.'"

He then points to a person in the crowd and asks, "What generation are you?" But before they have a chance to answer, he jokes, "It doesn't matter. I don't care. That's the beautiful thing." He adds that if an audience member doesn't like the joke, guess what? Doesn't care. "If y'all don't like this joke, guess what, you're only giving me more cred as a Gen X-er. You're only making me more powerful."

The truth is that some of the stereotypes about Gen X aren't exactly true. Sure, we had director Richard Linklater calling us slackers. And Ben Stiller's film Reality Bites didn't exactly help dissuade the argument that we were ultra prepared for adulthood.

Gen X, Reality Bites, Winona Ryder, Ethan Hawke, gifConvenience store dance scene from the film Reality BitesGiphy, Universal Pictures, Jersey Films

But in an article called "8 Things That Gen X Gave the World" (via The Arrow, via – gasp – the AARP website) Esquire editor and radio and television personality Dave Holmes dispels some of those myths. "Generation X is exactly like corn. We’re largely ignored in the broader culture, disregarded in polling, a demilitarized zone between the boomers and the millennials. But we’ve actually contributed a great deal to the society that has spurned us."

He goes on to list some of those contributions, which in part include: blogs, alternative comedy, "comic books as our new global religion," and a little something called the Internet. Of the latter, he writes that in 1994, after he'd graduated from college and moved to New York, he had a friend who was "writing code for the Sony Music website."

He shares, "At the time, I had no idea what the word 'website' meant. My understanding of the Internet came entirely from Prodigy, a rudimentary content delivery network. But then one Saturday afternoon, Mike and I went up to his office, he turned his monitor on, and after that 20-minute connection process, he opened Netscape and typed in 'http://www.yahoo.com.' 'There,' he said, 'search for anything.' 'Anything?' I asked. 'Anything at all. Someone will have made a website for it.'"

Gen X, early internet, The Internet, Netscape, the WebA GIF of what the early Internet looked like.Giphy

So while apathy might not be the best description for Gen X, Jason Salmon proves one thing we can all agree on: they (we) have a sense of humor.

Many of the comments agree. One commenter under his YouTube clips proves that maybe we DO care a little. "Why is Gen X trending so much lately? Are we finally getting the recognition that we don't care about?"