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Health

8 nontraditional empathy cards that are unlike any you've ever seen. They're perfect!

Because sincerity and real talk are important during times of medical crisis.

True compassion.

When someone you know gets seriously ill, it's not always easy to come up with the right words to say or to find the right card to give.

Emily McDowell — a former ad agency creative director and the woman behind the Los Angeles-based greeting card and textile company Emily McDowell Studio — knew all too well what it was like to be on the receiving end of uncomfortable sentiments.

At the age of 24, she was diagnosed with Stage 3 Hodgkin's lymphoma. She went into remission after nine months of chemo and has remained cancer-free since, but she received her fair share of misplaced, but well-meaning, wishes before that.

On her webpage introducing the awesome cards you're about to see, she shared,

"The most difficult part of my illness wasn't losing my hair, or being erroneously called 'sir' by Starbucks baristas, or sickness from chemo. It was the loneliness and isolation I felt when many of my close friends and family members disappeared because they didn't know what to say or said the absolute wrong thing without realizing it."

Her experience inspired Empathy Cards — not quite "get well soon" and not quite "sympathy," they were created so "the recipients of these cards [can] feel seen, understood, and loved."

Scroll down to read these sincere, from-the-heart, and incredibly realistic sentiments.


Emily McDowell Studio

Pretty great, right? If you know someone who's in the less-than-ideal position of dealing with a serious illness, you can purchase any of these eight cards to share with them.

Visit Emily McDowell Studio's shop to select the card(s) you need. They're $5.00 each.

(We're not being paid to share these, nor were we asked to do so. We came across the cards and I loved them, so I reached out to Emily McDowell Studio and asked if I could share them with you. Unfortunately, a lot of us know someone who could use a card like one of these.)


This article originally appeared on 05.06.15







Canva

Feeling overwhelmed? Take a walk outside.

Regardless of what you're going through, self-care is important.

I once read something that said, "It's not the hard times that define you, it's how you respond." One important tool when it comes to dealing with personal challenges is self-care.

What is self-care? The University of Kentucky's Student Affairs Center describes self-care as "[A]ny intentional actions you take to care for your physical, mental, and emotional health."



In times of stress, trauma, or crisis, practicing self-care can help manage your health.

While self-care isn't the be-all and end-all to dealing with stress, it can be a valuable recovery tool. Here are a few self-care suggestions from Crisis Clinic.

1. Exercise — even a little bit.

yoga, fitness, mental health, psychology

A woman stretches on a yoga mat.

Photo by Dane Wetton on Unsplash

Don't worry, we're not talking about running a marathon here. Your form of exercise can be as light or as intense as you want it to be. Don't have access to a gym? No problem! Take a walk around the block, try a yoga routine on YouTube, climb the bleachers at your local high school track, go window-shopping at the mall, or give your home a speedy power clean. There are tons of ways to get your endorphins pumping, and any number of them can have a positive impact on your mood.

2. Give yourself permission to focus on someone outside yourself.

Making someone else feel good is a great way to lift your own spirits. Try volunteering or call up an old friend or family member you haven't talked to in a while and brighten their day.

3. Give and get physical touch: A hug can do wonders.

intimacy, relationships, friendship, sociology

Good hugs require you to really get in there.

Photo by Tani Eisenstein on Unsplash

4. Give yourself permission to feel bad: Schedule it in your day. Remind yourself that your reactions are normal.

Sometimes the worst thing you can do when you're feeling down is to beat yourself up for feeling down. Remember you're human and everyone has good days and bad days.

5. Give yourself permission to feel good.

Everyone's feel-good solution is different. Just be careful and make sure not to partake in activities that could cause harm to yourself or anyone else. Get some ice cream, watch your favorite movie, or laugh at a fart joke! Sometimes when we're going through something difficult, we keep ourselves from experiencing joy because we don't think it's appropriate or we think we don't deserve it. Remember that it's OK to laugh and feel good during times of sadness, even if it's only for a moment.

6. Structure your time and develop a routine.

Finding time for friends, family, work, play, and everything in between can be difficult, even on your best days. Too often when we're extremely busy or stressed, we forget to make time for even simple things like lunch or quiet time. To make things easier on yourself, try setting alarms on your phone or online calendar for everything from meetings and appointments to taking your vitamins. There are also tons of productivity apps you can use to set for daily, weekly, and even hourly goals if needed. Not a fan of digital scheduling? Try a paper planner or giant laminated calendar to help organize and structure your days.

7. Engage in practices that are meaningful to you, such as prayer, walking in the woods, sitting quietly, reading inspirational material, taking a bath, or writing in a journal.

meditation, spirituality, medicine, education

It's always a good time to check in with yourself.

Photo by Darius Bashar on Unsplash

8. Take breaks from periods of isolation.

Everyone needs alone time now and then, but try setting a timer for yourself so you can get some fresh air and connect with others.

9. Talk it out — even with a professional.

Don't have health insurance or access to a health care professional? There are tons of free resources that can connect you with someone online or by phone. Check out yourlifeyourvoice.org for videos, articles, and local resources for people struggling with depression. Also, the Crisis Clinic (the wonderful organization behind this self-care list) has a 24-hour hotline.

10. Get plenty of rest so that you feel refreshed and relaxed.

Don't underestimate the power of a good night's sleep! If you have trouble sleeping at night, try turning off the TV and electronic devices like your cell phone and computer at least one hour before you want to go to bed. A cup of hot (decaf) tea before bed can be helpful. Also, things like regular exercise, stretching, and calming music can help your body successfully power down before bedtime.

Self-care shouldn't just be for the tough times. Make it a habit worth keeping.

The tricky thing about self-care is that when you're feeling down, exercising or going to see a doctor is usually the last thing on your mind. That's why it's important to make self-care a part of your daily life. Self-care can be an important tool for times of crisis, but it's much easier to implement if you're taking care of yourself during the good times, too.


This article originally appeared on 12.22.15

Identity

Here's what it'll look like if trans people aren't allowed to use the right bathroom

No woman should be forced to use the men's restroom, and no man should be forced to use the women's.

Picture pulled from YouTube video

Transgender man posts photos protesting a series of bill across the U.S. and Canada.

This article originally appeared on 03.31.15


This is a man named Michael Hughes.

Why is he in a women's restroom?



Michael is protesting a series of bills across the U.S. and Canada that, if passed, would ban men like him from using men's restrooms and leave him no choice but to use the women's room.

Bizarrely, these laws have been proposed as a way to protect the privacy and safety of women.(I know. It doesn't make sense, but hang with me.)

Michael is a transgender man, meaning that when he was born, the doctor looked at him and labeled him a girl.

As Michael can tell you, he's not a girl and he's not a woman.

Inspired by a woman from Canada, Michael has been snapping selfies in women's restrooms to show people just how out of place he looks.

biological sex, legalizing discrimination, public restrooms

Michael Hughes advocates for Transgender freedoms and rights.

Photo pulled from YouTube video

If these types of bills become law, people like Michael and other trans men would be forced to use women's restrooms.

Is this the type of guy you want in your restrooms and locker rooms, ladies?

Several states have proposed laws legalizing discrimination against transgender people this year alone.

The main focus of these bills has been whether trans people should be allowed to use public restrooms, though they're often part of a larger effort to deny rights to trans people.

Texas' bill would have denied trans people entrance to public restrooms, showers, or changing rooms.

The penalty for using a restroom that doesn't match the gender "established by the individual's chromosomes" is up to a year in prison and a fine up to $4,000.

Even worse, the bill stated that an "operator, manager, superintendent, or other person with authority over a building" who willfully allows a trans person to use restrooms that match their actual gender will be charged with a felony and could serve a minimum of 180 days in prison and be fined up to $10,000.

The bill remains in committee awaiting action.

Florida's language would have established gender as one's "biological sex, either male or female, at birth."

The bill's sponsor, state Rep. Frank Artiles, brushed off backlash by arguing that going to the bathroom is a choice.

The punishment for a trans person who uses the correct bathroom in Florida would have been up to a year in prison and a fine up to $1,000. The bill died in committee, and did not become law.

Kentucky's bill would have denied trans students the ability to use the correct restroom.

The bill came in response to a Louisville school's decision to allow a trans student to use the restroom that matches their gender.

While the bill didn't specify punishment for using the "incorrect" restroom, it did put what some are calling a "bounty" on catching trans students in the "wrong" restroom. The bill did not become law.

The groups pushing to deny trans people the ability to use restrooms simply spread misinformation.

Opponents of trans-inclusive environments argue that allowing trans people to use restrooms that match their gender invites and allows men into women's restrooms to leer and assault women at will.

Their arguments aren't based in reality.

(Still with me? The laws are pretty ridiculous, but now you know why they're being proposed.)

It's just as ridiculous for a trans woman to have to use the men's restroom as it is for Michael to have to use the women's restroom.

Trans women are not men, and Michael is not a woman.

When it comes down to it, trans people just need to pee. That's all.

Watch Michael Hughes' appearance on MSNBC's "Out There" with Thomas Roberts below:

"It takes me like a half an hour to shave my father because I have to be so careful," a middle-aged man declares.

The man, identified as New Jersey native Kristian Rex, presses the razor to his elderly, disabled father's face — a face he loves. With great care, he glides the blade across his father's chin, upper lip, and cheeks, taking pains to listen and follow instructions.

"He's really particular about his sideburns." he says, as his dad smiles.


The ad, which recently won six Lion Awards at Cannes, is the centerpiece of the launch of Gillette's Treo, which the company calls the "first-ever assisted shaving razor."

The blade, which is designed specifically for a caregiver to use on clients or family members, is currently in testing. The company plans to distribute 10,000 razors free as part of the trial. The data they gather will help inform the final design.  

"When we spoke with our partners like [the American Society of Aging], we learned that the primary goal of family members and professional caregivers alike is to help maintain a sense of normalcy and to support lost functions — like the ability to shave oneself," Melissa Monich, Procter & Gamble's vice president of research and development, global grooming, said in a news release.

Adapting the Treo for caregiver use meant redesigning the company's traditional blade to optimize for one person shaving another.

The most drastic change is to the handle, which works "like a paintbrush" and includes a divot that operators place their fingers on for a steadier shave. The handle also contains built-in shaving gel, allowing caregivers to lather and shave in one motion.

Some caregivers plan to waiting and see if the Treo will really work as advertised.

While others are cautiously optimistic.

The company hopes the innovation results in a "dignified shaving experience" for those unable to shave themselves.

"We were struck by how important these day-to-day activities are in supporting the dignity, pride, and morale of those who need assistance," Monich said.

Soon, a few thousand people will have a chance to see if the blade delivers that boost — and a clean shave, to boot.

People interested in receiving a free razor as part of the pilot program can register here through Nov. 30, 2017.