A simple neuroscience brain trick to stay quiet instead of saying impulsive things you'll regret
Calm body, closed mouth.
A woman zipping up her lips.
There are times to speak up, moments when it’s best to say nothing, and opportunities be very considerate in your response. But when you’re on the receiving end of a back-handed compliment, a foolish remark, or a coworker takes you down a peg, and your emotions are up, it can be hard to have a thoughtful response. Often, we say something we shouldn’t.
How is it that some folks fly off the handle and say things they’ll later regret, while others can stay calm and remove themselves from the situation or take the high ground? One way to be less impulsive with your words is to use the “name it to tame it” neuroscience hack, originally coined by author and psychiatrist Dr. Dan Siegel. When used properly, it allows you to step back from the moment and choose the best response in a challenging situation.

How to use the ‘name it to tame it’ hack
When someone upsets you, the first thing to do is to go inside yourself and describe the emotion that you feel in your body. Are you angry? Are you sad? Are you afraid? Do you feel rejected? Are you disappointed? The moment you name the emotion, it will begin to subside and give you the emotional and mental room to respond to the person who caused the negative emotion, rather than impulsively reacting.
How to respond to a reactive emotion so you don’t fly off the handle:
Event happens:
1. Your body stiffens up
2. You feel an intense emotion
3. You examine the emotion and give it a name: “My body is telling me I am angry.”
4. You should feel the emotion beginning to subside
5. Choose your response instead of being impulsive

Why does ‘name it to tame it’ work?
“Name it to tame it” works because, when we have a strong emotional reaction, our lizard brain kicks in, and we go into fight, flight, or freeze mode. The lizard brain is not known for giving thoughtful and strategic responses to challenging situations. When we name the emotion, our prefrontal cortex, or the thinking brain, kicks in. The thinking brain looks at the situation and says, “Alright, we don’t need to run or fight here. It's best to give a strategic response.”
When we tune into the negative emotions by naming them, they relax because they feel heard, like when a child has hurt their knee or a loved one has real concern and you gives them undivided attention. Once the emotions are named, they are tamed. Then, you are more likely to respond to the negative person with grace and speak from the best part of yourself.
Dr. Dan Siegel, who coined the phrase “Name it to tame it,” explains the brain science behind the technique in the video below. He does a great job of explaining how it allows us to transfer our thoughts from the downstairs brain (the lizard brain) to the upstairs brain (the thinking brain), so we can calm down and respond appropriately to the situation.
- YouTube www.youtube.com



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Watch Colin Jost try Olympic bobsledding and gain a whole new level of respect for the sport
"I swear to God, I thought I was going to die. I thought my back was gonna snap in half."
Bobsledding is a lot more intense than it looks.
Some Olympic sports are obviously difficult and, clearly, inherently dangerous. You can't watch a snowboarder twirl upside down in mid-air, 17 feet above a 22-foot halfpipe wall, and not admire the heck out of the effort it takes to reach that level of courage, skill, and athleticism. Watching skiers barreling down a mountain at 60 to 80 mph with nothing but a thin suit between them and the ground, expertly avoiding obstacles as they do it, is objectively impressive to the average person.
But the challenge of other sports isn't as immediately appreciated. Curling may be hard, but it doesn't look that hard. And bobsled might take some level of athletic ability, but other than a 5-second run before you jump into the sled, it's really just about momentum and steering, right? Sure, they go fast, but bobsledders sit inside a protective metal casing, so it looks more like a thrilling roller coaster ride than a physically challenging and dangerous sport, right?
That's what Saturday Night Live's Colin Jost thought. Then he tried it, and thankfully, he took all of us along with him. In a clip from NBC Sports, Jost describes his bobsled ride in Lake Placid, New York, as "by far, the scariest experience I've ever had in my life."
First, watch his full run here:
Jost rode along with an experienced driver and didn't even have to do anything but feel it. And, boy, did he feel it. We can see how his body was violently jostled from the physics of flying down the track. As the driver said, astronauts take off in a space shuttle at about three Gs. In the bobsled, they did about 5 Gs, which means he was feeling five times his body weight pushing down on him.
We can see and hear the shift from "Wow!" to "Holy ____!" as Jost's thrill turned to terror on the track.
"I was in no way prepared for that," Jost said. "I truly thought my body was going to break apart. I'm not exaggerating. It was so much more intense than I expected."
Jost told Mike Tirico that he was "not prepared for the level of terror of this bobsled."
"I swear to God, I thought I was going to die," he said. "I thought my back was gonna snap in half. I thought my bones were gonna fly off my body and be littered all up and down the bobsled track."
People loved seeing an average person partake in an Olympic event, especially someone as honest about the experience as Jost was, as evidenced in the comments:
"Now THIS is the kind of commentary I want!"
"Huge thank you to whoever put Colin Jost in a bobsled."
"Can we have him do every event for a reference point?"
"This is what we've been asking for - an average person participating so we can get a real account! Thank you for your service, Colin Jost!"
"He was so horrified he couldn’t even be hilarious about it 💀"
"He completely lost his composure, 😂 you could tell he was scared, and it did look like the fastest thing anyone would ride."
"You know what... his explanation really helped me understand how scary bobsledding is and now I'm more interested in watching. Keep this guy on the air. That second scream shows me he's telling the truth 😂"
The video really does offer a whole different perspective on how difficult bobsledding actually is. Jost was just trying to keep his body together. Imagine having to focus and steer on top of handling those G-forces.
Retired NFL player and popular podcaster Jason Kelce also tried out the bobsled in Park City, Utah, and had a similar "holy ____" experience. He seemed to enjoy it a little more than Jost did, perhaps more accustomed to his body taking a beating as a professional football player, but he said it was far more intense than it looked. It didn't feel like a roller coaster, he said. The 1,400 pounds of pressure pushing him into the metal bars of the sled bruised his hips, and, at one point, it got so loud he couldn't hear his own screams.
- YouTube www.youtube.com
Seeing how careening down an ice track in an aerodynamic sled feels really does lend a whole new level of wow to a sport that some might mistakenly see as glorified sledding. It also lends more weight to 41-year-old Elana Meyers Taylor's run that earned her her first Olympic gold medal in her sixth Olympic Games in Milano Cortina. She had earned three silver medals and two bronze medals, making her the most decorated U.S. female bobsledder of all time.
Seriously, nothing but respect for the bobsledders from here on out.