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“A balm for the soul”
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Heroes

5 times Leonardo DiCaprio's viral documentary gave me real feelings.

Leonardo DiCaprio's new documentary, "Before the Flood," has been on YouTube for just a few days, but it already has millions of views.

The documentary is a moving, uncompromising look at climate change, produced by both DiCaprio and National Geographic. In the documentary, DiCaprio, who's been an outspoken supporter of climate action, gives us a refreshing, very frank look at what the climate change situation is really like.

DiCaprio doesn't pull his punches on the big stuff, but what actually fascinated me were some of the smaller, simpler, more emotional moments.

"Before the Flood" is an hour and a half long, and I can't recommend watching it enough, mostly because of these five affecting, emotional moments that stayed with me once the movie was done.

1. The quiet moment when a researcher admits how much the natural world means to him.

All images are screengrabs from "Before the Flood"/National Geographic/YouTube.

Near the beginning of the film, DiCaprio goes up to Greenland to check out the glaciers and ice sheets. You'll get to see amazing footage of crevasses and ice floes, and he also does some really cool interviews, including one with a local hunter.

But one moment in this scene stands out: DiCaprio is standing with Dr. Enric Sala, a marine ecologist and National Geographic explorer, watching some narwhals come up before them. You can actually hear the whales click and purr.

Then, just at the end, Sala turns to DiCaprio and says, unbidden, "You know, I don't want to be on a planet without these animals."

2. The moment in Beijing that made me think about my own family.

A short while later, the crew is in Beijing talking to a Chinese woman who's holding an air mask in her hand. She explains what it's like to live surrounded by Beijing's legendarily bad air pollution, mentioning that her family puts on their masks when they step outside and feed the cat.

"When the air is bad it hurts my throat," the woman says.

The scene isn't as visually impressive as drone footage of smoke stacks or giant industrial machines, but it stuck with me all the same. It sounds like the kind of everyday comment someone in my family might make.

3. The moment when Sunita Narain called out DiCaprio's wishful thinking and told him to get real.

Later, DiCaprio goes to India to talk to Sunita Narain, an environmentalist and activist. About 30% of India — roughly 300 million people — still live with no electricity, so the discussion turns to how to bring power to people without resorting to fossil fuels.

If you're like me and like thinking about the nitty-gritty of climate change — not just the big goals but the hard truths and big questions — this is an amazing exchange. But the best part is when she calls out the U.S. for wanting India to move to renewables while the U.S. drags their feet.

"If it was that easy, I would have really liked the U.S. to move towards solar, but you haven't," Narain says. "Let's put our money where our mouth is."

It's real, uncompromising conversation and actually feels awesome. It's a "take that" to every simpering, milquetoast politician who's more concerned with firing up their base and talking pretty than getting results.

4. The moment I'll remember every time I watch a snowy movie from now on.

While they were filming "The Revenant," they actually had to have the snow trucked in. It was too warm. In fact, they ended up having to fly halfway around the world to frosty Argentina in order to continue filming.

I remember "The Revenant." I remember the snow and the cold and the biting frost of that film. To think of future movies having to truck in snow is just so ... weird. I'm not sure I'll be able to see any frozen, snowy landscape without wondering how much snow was there and how much had to be trucked in.

5. Finally, what might have been my favorite moment: when DiCaprio asked Obama a really uncomfortable question.

This is my favorite moment in the film by far.

"You are the leader of the free world," says DiCaprio. "You have access to information that most people do not. What makes you terrified for the future?"

Obama's answer? He waxes poetic about his kids for a moment, but when it comes down to it, he says, a huge amount of people live near the ocean. If the sea levels rise, those people will need to flee to somewhere — and that could be a problem.

"In very hard-headed terms, you've got to worry about the national security implications of this. And the capacity for the existing world order as we understand it to survive the kinds of strains that the scientists are predicting."

In truth, this movie is full of amazing moments. It was really hard to pick just five.

There were so many awesome scenes, like when DiCaprio visits the mayor of Miami Beach, which is already experiencing flooding, or when he feeds rescued orangutans in Indonesia and tried his Italian on Pope Francis.

But in the end, "Before the Flood" has two simple messages.

One, we have to consume differently. We need to think about where our food and lifestyles are coming from. In many ways, though, we're beyond the stage where simple actions can solve everything. So two, and perhaps more importantly, we all need to vote. We need world leaders who will invest in renewables and put taxes on carbon.

The final segment, by the way — where DiCaprio gives a speech to the United Nations — might be the most affecting. I found it hard to not tear up. But I'm not going to link to it because you really owe it to yourself to watch the whole movie.

Parenting

Man asks how to help his wife who works full-time with a baby at home and keeps getting the same answer

More and more families are trying to scrape by — by trying to do it all

Photo by Katie Emslie on Unsplash

There are times in parenting where you just feel kind of useless.

You can't carry the baby, take a late-night breastfeeding shift, or absorb any of the pain and discomfort of childbirth.

Sometimes the best you can do is to try to take care of your partner.

That's what brought user u/DietyBeta to the AskParents subreddit with a well-meaning question.

"My wife watches our 1yo, works, and is 12 week pregnant. How can I make her daily life easier while I'm away at work?"

He says that when he gets home from work, he takes over all parenting and homemaking duties.

But yeesh! That's still... a lot to handle. No wonder his wife is stressed out.

A few folks chimed in to pat the OP on the back. After all, it's great to see a dad who realizes how much is falling on mom's shoulders and actively looking for ways to lighten the load!

Some helpful suggestions rolled in, like taking over meal prep and making her easy lunches to heat up, hiring cleaners, or paying someone to walk the dogs.

woman in black shirt lying on couch Photo by Alexander Grey on Unsplash


But then even more people came in to the comments asking the same question over and over: If mom is working, why isn't the 1-year-old in daycare?

u/young-mommy wrote: "Is the one year old in daycare? If not, I would start there. Working from home with a child gets harder and harder as they enter toddlerhood"

u/min2themax said: "It’s nice of you to be asking how to help her but she really is getting the fuzzy end of the lollipop here. It sounds like she is literally always working or parenting. Sometimes both at the same time. Walking the dogs and making her lunches and prepping meals and doing laundry is all well and good but this is not at all sustainable."

u/alternative-box3260 said: "Have the one year old in daycare. I was in a similar situation and it’s impossible. I was able to breath after that, not before."

And u/sillychihuahua26 wrote: "She’s caring for your 1.year old while working? That’s a horrible plan. You guys need childcare like yesterday."

We have a legitimate childcare crisis in our country, and stories like this one really bring it to life.

Childcare in the United States isn't nearly accessible or affordable enough for most families. Period.

ChildCare Aware found that that average cost of childcare in 2022 was $10,853 per year, or roughly 10% of a median family income (in 2024, it's likely even more than that — yet the actual workers at childcare centers are somehow severely underpaid).

But even that eye-popping number is conservative. Anyone who lives anywhere close to a city (or in California or New York) knows the number will be way higher. It's just not feasible for most families to put their child, let alone multiple children, in full-time care while they're young.

And yet! The percentage of households with two parents working full-time has been rising for decades. Life is more expensive than ever, and the extra income from two working parents really helps, even if it's offset by those child care costs.

More and more families are trying to scrape by — by trying to do it all

woman in white shirt sitting on brown wooden armchair Photo by Keren Fedida on Unsplash

Now we don't know whether the OP's family can afford childcare for their 1-year-old or not, although in a later update to the post he wrote:

"As far as daycare, she doesn't want to because she feels like she would be missing out on the time"

So even if you can afford childcare, there's the still the crushing guilt of shipping your child off to be raised by strangers to deal with! Classic.

(Take one guess who shoulders most of the daycare guilt — dads or moms?)

The work-from-home revolution has been a Godsend for parents in certain ways — flexibility, balance, less commuting time — but its also saddled many of them with double duty.

'Hey how about you work full-time because we need the money AND keep an eye on the kids, since you're home anyway!'

But it doesn't work like that, and trying to do both is crushing modern parents.

In fact, the Surgeon General of the United States just put out an official advisory based on the plummeting mental state of today's parents.

We know parents are having a hard time and that it's getting picked up in the national conversation. But hearing about a mom working full-time with a 1-year-old on her hip while pregnant, and a dad stuck working out of the house who's at a total loss for how to make things better really paints a pretty bleak picture.

No one should have to work full-time and parent full-time, at the same time.

A fridge full of microwavable lunches and a fleet of dog walkers isn't going to make it any better until things start changing from the very top.

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20-year-olds are sharing their 'hardest pills to swallow' about becoming adults

"You have to decide what you want to eat for every meal for the rest of your life."

Photo credit: Canva

Sometimes these harsh truths ultimately help us become better people.

When we’re kids, we can’t wait to finally be grown up. Then, before ya know it, BAM! You get your wish. You’re a grown up. And you learn the hard way that while having more freedom and independence is awesome, being an adult isn’t all perks. Not by a longshot.

Recently, Redditor u/BluebirdIll6390 asked, "What's the hardest pill to swallow in your early twenties?"

While answers varied, one huge theme was the harsh reality of having to hold ourselves accountable. It’s up to us to manage our health and finances, continue learning, live by our values and generally create a life that fulfills us. And even then, there are no guarantees—another harsh reality.

And while these responses might be a little sobering, there’s also some relief to be had in knowing that these are “hard pills” we all must swallow in order to continue being well adjusted adults.

Scroll below to check out some of the most interesting answers.


1. "You have to become the driving force making the next steps of your life happen. There’s a pretty clear, direct pipeline from childhood to university. After that, it's all open. A lot of people get stuck floating around in post-college purgatory, waiting for something to happen, but you just have to be the one to make those things happen now. It’s very easy to get sucked into the rhythm of the first job you get out of college, setting up wherever you’re situated, having ideas of what you’d like to do with your life with no urgency to get started because you’re under the false assumption you’ve all the time in the world. You’re young, but the days are long, and the years are short. Don’t wait to start living." —u/shroom_in_bloom

2. "The hardest thing for me was realizing that some of my friends and family were objectively bad people who would never change and/or grow up." —u/Mirraco323

3. "You have to decide what you want to eat for every meal for the rest of your life."

growing older, ask reddit, deciding what to eat, eating healthyForever in menu paralysis until the day I die. Photo credit: Canva

—u/Niramarsk

4. "For me, a hard pill to swallow was realizing how much I actually have to make to have the lifestyle to which I was accustomed and how far I was from that as a recent graduate." —u/Smgt90

5. "Some careers don't start till you're in your 30s." —u/Neither-Historian227

6. "Your parents are getting older and won't be here forever.” —u/themagicbong

7. “Holidays won't be magical unless you make them magical. You have to go out of your way to decorate and do themed things to get that sense of excitement you had as a kid.”

growing older, ask reddit, halloween decorBut hey, at least you can decorate your home the way YOU want to. Photo credit: Canva

—u/Little-Bones

8. "You will either cultivate habits, willpower, study, exercise, and routines for success, or you will slowly watch yourself fade. No one is protecting you from yourself anymore." —u/phoenix14830

9. "This is likely the best your body will ever feel. Put in the work now, and your body will thank you. I'm talking about flexibility work, strength work, skin and teeth."—u/myic90

10. "Remember how, as a kid, a year took forever? Like the week after Christmas, had this crushing reality that it would be forever before it happened again? Now, remember how fast this last year went? Yeah. That's your life. You'll be 30, wondering what happened to time. It just keeps getting faster. Don't try to speed through, even in the bad times. Take time. Don't live for the weekend, don't put things aside for 'another time.' People say you won't be young forever, but nobody prepares you for how short 'not forever' it actually is." —u/MentalSewage

11. "Your comfort zone quickly becomes a prison if you indulge in it. You need to push your boundaries and only fall back into your comfort zone when you absolutely need it. Staying in your comfort zone will breed anxiety when you leave it. You have to put yourself into uncomfortable situations to build up resilience for the future." —u/Crackracket

12. "That feeling of being a kid who is just figuring shit out never actually ends." —u/Former-Finish4653

13. "Realizing that adulting is a full-time job with no time off."

growing older, ask redditDay off? I don't know her. Photo credit: Canva

—u/FrostyGameKnight55

14. “Everything you think is so unique about yourself has been done a million times over by other humans.” —u/Fishfishbirdbirdcat

15. “At the end of the day, you are on your own. No parent, teacher, or camp counselor will swoop in, resolve conflicts, and guide you to the next step. You have to figure it all out. You can ask people for advice, but the problems are infinitely more complex and never have a 'right' answer, only a 'best we can figure' answer given what you have available. Yes, close friends or a significant other can be there to aid you when you need help with projects, moving, or a shoulder to cry on. But at the end of the day, it's your life, and you must steer the ship."—u/adunk9

16. "All the fun of going to school, having summers off, having 'breaks' for fall or winter...that's just about over. Time to go to work every day until you're ready to retire. Hope you enjoyed your school years!" —u/cibman

17. “Friendships grow out of proximity- once that proximity is gone it requires effort to maintain.So once you leave school those people whom you thought were ride or die for life, will move on without you. Your best friends at work will forget about you 6 months after one of you leaves the job. To maintain friendships, you need to maintain shared interests. The corollary of this is also true- to gain friends, take an interest in their interests and use that to gain proximity.”

growing older, ask redditLook how much fun they're having. Photo credit: Canva

—u/The4th88

And last, but certainly not least…

18. "'You can be the sweetest, juiciest peach in the world, and there will still be people who don't like peaches.'"—u/HazelGhost

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Joy

Man attempts to rescue stray kitten and quickly discovers he got more than he bargained for

Here kitty, kitty! Oh wait, there are 12 more of you?

Photo by Dorothea OLDANI on Unsplash

It's kitten season!

Who can resist a sweet little kitten trying to cross the road? Even if you’re not a fan of cats, you’d likely stop for a baby animal in the street. That’s what happened to Robert Brantley of Louisiana. Brantley was on his way to work and spotted a tiny white and gray kitten trying to get across the street. Being a kind human, he stopped his car to bring the kitten to safety. But he got more than he bargained for, because as he was scooping up the little thing, several more kitty cat siblings came running out of the nearby grass.

In all, Brantley counted 13 kittens. Twelve more than he planned on caring for, but by the looks of his Instagram page, his family has taken their role of cat rescuers seriously. With kitten season being in full effect in these warmer months and pet surrenders remaining high since the return to work from the pandemic, Brantley taking on fostering 13 kittens is much needed. Humane societies across the country are reportedly full or even over capacity. My own local humane society currently has nearly 150 animals over its limit and is begging for foster families and adopters to help clear the shelter.

It’s not only humane societies that have reached or exceeded capacity. Animal rescues across the board are in dire need of people to take animals to make room for the inevitable drop off of puppies and kittens from the current litter season. Mating season, which subsequently turns into puppy and kitten season, starts in early spring and lasts throughout the summer. This inundates local shelters and rescues.

Some shelters, like my local humane society, are asking people who find litters of puppies or kittens to do exactly what Brantley is doing.

Foster them and attempt to adopt them out on their own. It looks like Brantley's wife decided to get these now cleaned up kitties in their Sunday best to have a photoshoot in her makeshift studio. One kitten sported a bow tie while the others climbed around the enclosure patiently awaiting their turn. It also seems Brantley himself is having fun with the situation—in one video he talks about what he packs to go on a marksmanship match and includes 13 kittens along with his tripod and toolkit.

In one of Brantley’s most recent updates, he says that two of the kittens, Michael Scott and Nala, have been adopted by a family in Alexandria, Louisiana. In the same update he informs his followers that one of the kittens still left to be adopted is currently on daily medication and the family is keeping up with check-ups for the rest of the furry crew.

Here’s hoping that all of these little guys get adopted out soon. And may more people take Brantley’s lead to foster the kittens or puppies they find if they have the means. This can also serve as a reminder to spay and neuter your pets and any strays you may be caring for outside of your home.


This article originally appeared on 6.16.22

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Health

Bill Maher says smartphones are deadlier for kids than school shooters. Where's the logic?

He supports taking phones away from kids at school.

via Warner Brothers PR and Pixabay/Pexels

Kids staring at their phones and HBO's Bill Maher.

The September 4th school shooting at Apalachee High School in Georgia that killed 2 students and 2 teachers prompted an interesting discussion about how to protect school children on the September 6th episode of HBO’s “Real Time with Bill Maher.”

In the wake of the tragedy, Maher was encouraged that the shooter’s father has been charged with murder for buying his 14-year-old son an AR-15 that may have been used in the shooting.

“It's America. So we had a school shooting. When schools go back into session and we're gonna have to talk about this 'cause it happens a few times every year. I think it's happened 45 times already this year, by the way. Here's the new wrinkle in this one. Now they're blaming the parents as I think they should,” Maher said on a segment featuring John Avlon, a Democrat running for Congress in New York’s First District and Rich Lowry, Editor-in-Chief of the conservative National Review.

Maher says that the shooter’s parents were “derelict” in their duty and extended that critique to those who let their kids bring smartphones to school. “And we can't also talk about taking phones away from kids in school. It's funny. I think the problem here is that parents just don't have the ability to say no to kids for anything,” Maher said to a big round of applause.



In a country where liberals and conservatives are at odds over gun control laws, Maher sees charging parents as a sensible, bipartisan way to improve the situation. He equated this to the recent rise in bipartisan laws nationwide that ban students from bringing their smartphones to class.

“This is an issue of bipartisan support,” Avlon said. “There shouldn't be smartphones in schools because nobody likes 'em. Not good for the kids, not good for the teachers, not good for learning. So that's an area where there is bipartisan agreement. Let's act on that. Let's keep advancing it.”

Studies show that since 2010, when smartphones became widely used by young people, the U.S., and other developed nations saw an astronomical spike in mental health problems, including self-harm, suicide, psychological distress, anxiety, and depression.



Smartphones and social media are also associated with bullying, decreased attention span, diminished social development and trouble with sleep. Collectively, these issues have resulted in an unprecedented mental health crisis.

A study by the Centers for Disease Control found that the suicide rate among young people rose 62% between 2007 and 2021. The problem has been especially bad for teenage girls, who are at higher risk of suicidal ideation and behaviors than their male counterparts. In 2021, 3 in 10 female high school students said they had seriously considered attempting suicide.

While there’s yet to be a study that confirms a direct, causal link between smartphone use and the dramatic rise in suicide among young people, studies show that when smartphone use is reduced, their mental health improves.

Maher made a bold point during the discussion that’s worth examining. He says the mental health problems caused by smartphones may pose a greater danger to America’s youth than school shootings.

“But a point to [Avalon’s] point about the guns being obviously more dangerous in the immediate than the phones. Yeah, true. But if you did a really long-term study, I mean over decades. I'm not sure that would come out that way because suicides alone caused by the phone. We know this happens; lots of other bad things happened because of that godd**n phone. And now, 9 states are on board with taking away the phone for the day.”



“I'm a Neanderthal on this,” Lowry added. “All screens are the enemy. They are distraction machines. Even if you're just sitting and watching TV all day, is that a happy person? No. And we've conducted this mass social psychological experiment on teens with social media. And it's been a disaster.”

It’s not fair to the victims of teen suicide or school shootings to say that one problem is greater than the other because the loss of every young life is an unquestionable tragedy. But when it comes to the space these issues occupy in the public consciousness, all 3 panelists agreed that we should treat mental health issues caused by smartphones as seriously as school shootings.

Every year, an average of 6,500 young Americans between the ages of 10 to 24 years old die by suicide. Over the past 10 years, an average of 38.5 Americans were murdered at the hands of school shooters every year.

The school shooting epidemic has inspired millions of Americans to take political action by backing gun control legislation and red flag laws. It has also deputized countless citizens to create school preparedness plans so that educators, students and law enforcement agencies have all the resources necessary to combat an active shooter situation. The problem persists, but concerted efforts are being made nationwide to make schools safer.

Smartphones don’t appear to be as dangerous as AR-15s, but their abuse can lead to the same devastating results. What if we take the same energy to help reduce suicide rates and improve mental health among young people by creating phone-free schools and childhoods that are more about sunshine than screen time?

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Culture

Pro-choicer gets called a 'murderer,' responds with questions about what it means to be 'pro-life'

Now that's what you call a "life" lesson.

Calling a pro-choice person a "murderer" is a sadly common inflammatory insult hurled by pro-birthers. In true medical terms, terminating an embryo is terminating a multicellular diploid eukaryotic organism, not murdering a person.

Nonetheless, people still invoke images of infanticide in order to demonize people advocating for reproductive health care access. Normalizing a debate around whether abortion is murder has only further stigmatized the very real existential threats women face without birth control and safe abortion access.

A recent screenshot posted on the Murdered by Words subreddit showed a heated exchange between a pro-choicer and the pro-birth person who called them an advocate for murder.


Screenshot via Reddit

The pro-choicer ignored the initial insult of "murderer" and continued the conversation by grilling the pro-lifer about how they intend to help build a world where people can healthily raise children.





The response read:

"What happens next? Once you have succeeded in your quest to stop the termination of a pregnancy - disregarding the circumstances for why the woman or couple wants to terminate (failed birth control, rape, lack of financial stability, unsuitable environment, domestic violence, mental health issues, lack of employment, medical issues, lack of comprehensive sexual education) - what happens next?"
"Who pays for the prenatal or postnatal care? Surely not a couple working a minimum wage who can barely afford their rent. Who provides healthcare and funds medical bills for a single woman with no place to live? Or a married couple who struggle to afford the children they already have? Who assists the millions of children in foster care, still waiting to be adopted? Who helps them when they hit the street at 18 with no money or life skills?"


Will you and your ilk - the self-proclaimed 'pro-life' community help to fund comprehensive sexual education for teens? How about access to affordable birth control? Why not promote a vasectomy as a viable option for men who don't want children? How about funding scientific research so men can have more birth control options than just condoms? Is your community going to help pay for healthcare and education costs? Once you have succeeded in stopping the termination of a pregnancy, what role will you have in ensuring a quality of life for the foetus you so desperately wanted to save?"

The pro-life person simply responded by claiming it's the parents' responsibility, which ushered in a final call out of the hypocrisy of many factions of the pro-life movement.





The pro-choicer's rebuttal ended with a bang, calling out all the ways the pro-birth community fails to support life after conception:

"And there's the money shot. Here's a wakeup call - you don't get to come into my inbox and shit all over my Sunday with your over-inflated Messiah complex with your Facebook profile filled with delusions of superiority declaring yourself to be on the side of "life." when in reality your compassion stops just inside the vaginal canal."
"Don't embarrass yourself and pretend that you give a flying fuck about what happens once a foetus is born, or about the people who aren't equipped to raise them. Don't pretend you give a shit about children when you aren't prepared to do a damn thing about the millions of struggling families on welfare, or the millions of children in foster care."


Don't pretend you give a shit about life, when you would rather just sit by and smugly proclaim women should 'close their legs' because it's less energy to do so than it is to lobby for resources that would make it easier for people to become parents. Go away."

Suffice it to say, the pro-birther had no rebuttal after that.


This article originally appeared on SomeeCards. You can read it here.



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